


Crafty Like A Fox

by flyingfoxtopus



Series: Domesticated Foxes [8]
Category: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Bucky Barnes Has PTSD, Civil War, Civil War Team Captain America, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Love Triangles, Multi, Mutual Pining, Pining, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Previous Relationship, Slow Burn, Suicide Attempt, continuing the grand tradition of not talking to each other, domesticated foxes, it's complicated - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-07
Updated: 2021-02-04
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:42:47
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 79
Words: 247,457
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24030760
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flyingfoxtopus/pseuds/flyingfoxtopus
Summary: The Avengers would protect the world, Steve would spend his life with Ayame, they would find Bucky and keep him safe. At least that had been the plan a few months ago.Steve’s world has changed a lot since then. Since Amy walked out on his marriage proposal. Since they lost what little trail, they had managed to pick up from the Winter Soldier. Since Tony got it into his head that if they can’t save everyone, they shouldn’t save anyone. Or whatever it is he thinks he’s doing.The world hasn’t seen any threats like Loki, or Hydra, or even Ultron, and the media is starting to look for a new villain in the Avengers. Tony’s pulled away from the team almost completely, only really talking to Rhody.Amy’s just gone. Even Nat hasn’t heard from her since their last night in Japan. She’s a ghost, the same way Bucky is a ghost. Steve’s bright future is gone with them. He’s back to just… existing. He’s got Sam and Nat. And it’s not like work has dried up, just reduced in scale. That doesn't stop him from feeling like he's missing something.What does a soldier do when the war is over and there’s nothing to go home to?
Relationships: James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers, James "Bucky" Barnes/Steve Rogers/Original Female Character(s), Sam Wilson (Marvel)/Original Male Character(s), Steve Rogers/Original Female Character(s)
Series: Domesticated Foxes [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1443574
Comments: 176
Kudos: 33





	1. Bucky likes the countryside

Three months of recon had led to this moment. Bucky stretched on his stomach on the roof of an apartment building in the outskirts of Omsk. Finally, he had the former Russian minister of defence in his crosshairs.  
  
Or almost in his crosshairs. At the moment the only thing he could see through his scope was a parking lot and the row of restaurants looking out on it. The minister was inside one of those restaurants having breakfast. Any moment now he would finish his meal. And then Bucky would get his shot.  
  
The grey-haired man emerged from the teahouse. His head centred in Bucky’s scope. Smiling down at the child holding his hand.  
  
Bucky's finger hesitated on the trigger. Why was there a child? Whose child was it?  
  
The minister returned the child to its mother. Bucky recognised her. The woman from the bath house. She worked the front desk. Probably provided other services in the back if you knew what to ask for. Damn the bath house. That place had been a weak spot in his intelligence from the start. With the fucking arm there was no way to get inside inconspicuously while it was open. He had broken in at night to get the layout and rule it out as a location for this action. But he hadn’t be able to observe and see how the minister interacted with anyone inside. He was obviously closer to the front desk girl than Bucky had thought.  
  
Which meant, the child was probably the minister’s and unacknowledged. Bucky was slightly surprised that she had been allowed to keep working after becoming a mother. The minister must be too cheap to take care of her and the child. Which made sense. He had a wife and a mistress already. It was bound to be slim pickings in the number three spot. The upside was she probably wouldn’t take too big of a hit when the minister went down. He would find out where she was staying and leave her a little money to be sure. There were too many innocents in all this.  
  
None of that was any comfort now though. The minister had moved out of the open and was getting into his car. Bucky didn’t have a clear shot anymore. The car roof was reinforced. He wouldn’t get through cleanly with the gun he had now. He needed to follow.  
  
That was why he had a driver waiting. Bucky dismantled his riffle and slid down the building’s drainpipe.  
  
Around the corner on the far side of the carpark from where the minister had been, sat a rusted-out pickup with a burly middle aged man in equally distressed pants and a sweater that was clearly home made. Bucky had found him at a local market for day labourers. His main qualification being he had his own truck. Bucky promised him more than four times his standard rate to drive him around in his work truck for the day and not questions. He had been hesitant at first. But the sight of a wad of American cash did a wonderful job of convincing people to do all sorts of things they wouldn’t normally.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky directed the driver. Winding them in and out of traffic so they stayed close to their target without drawing attention. The minister was speeding, dodging between cars, changing lanes without signalling. Bucky weighted the odds that he had been spotted and the minister was running versus him just being enough of a self-absorbed jerk to drive like a madman to save time.  
  
The erratic driving didn’t phase his driver at all. Then again Bucky was very aware that the rules of the road were really more like guild lines here. He turned to look at Bucky as they pulled through a red light without slowing. “You are American yes? I would love to move my family to America. So much safer.  
  
“I’m not paying you to talk. Just follow the car.” A sharp pain was growing behind his left eye. The minister was getting away. He should have taken the shot.  
  
*****  
  
The minister’s car led them out of town and deep into the countryside. The minister had a country house out here. One he didn’t visit often and one that Bucky hadn’t researched as much as he should have.  
  
The driver skidded to a stop in front of the closed gates. “Now what?”  
  
Bucky glared at the fence surrounding the secure compound. This would require more reconnaissance if he was going to avoid an out and out slaughter.  
  
The headache was getting worse. The Soldier part of his mind was telling him to charge in and kill everyone. Which meant he needed to do the opposite. He needed to find somewhere he could hole up for a few hours… or a few days. Somewhere where no one would question the sound of screams or things breaking. These breaks where why this was talking so long. His quarry would go to ground and it would take him ages to find them again. The pain wasn’t that bad. It would probably pass in a few hours if he got some rest. “We passed a farm a few miles back. Take me there.”  
  
*****  
  
The farm was dark. Its windows cracked and half boarded up. Abandoned. Good that’s what he had been hoping for.  
  
His driver was less comforted by the sight of the remote derelict building. “This is the part where you kill me isn’t? I knew I shouldn’t have taken this job. I have a family. I have children to feed and school fees to pay. I want them to have a better life than I did.”  
  
Shaking his head Bucky let himself out of the truck. “Shut up. I’m not going to kill you… unless you want to keep irritating me. Then I might.” Bucky peeled six US hundred dollar bills off of a stack. Two more than he had promised, he was a sucker for kids. And shoved them into the driver’s hand. “Go. Tell anyone about me and I’ll be back feeling less charitable.”  
  
He shrugged his gear bag onto his shoulder and waited for the taillights to disappear before he chose his hiding place.  
  
The house was the obvious choice. Through the dusty window he could see a table and chairs sitting in the kitchen. There was probably a mouldy mattress in one of the bedrooms. Maybe even a musty blanket.  
  
It was also the fist place someone would look if they were following him or his driver’s survival instincts weren’t as good as they seemed, and he told someone. They couldn’t be great; he had taken the job after all. Better to find somewhere less comfortable and more secure.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky could see the stars thought the tin roof of barn on the far side of the overgrown field. Barn was a generous description. If this place had ever seen an animal, it had died of depression. The crumbling cinder block walls were better suited to mechanical equipment than livestock. Waist high walls of the same rough brick divided the side wall into stalls or parking spots. The metal doors hung crooked. He could get an entire hand between the corner and the frame when they were closed. They only opened a few inches, and they did that with a noise that sounded like a banshee.  
  
It was dreary. It was drafty. He could _hear_ the vermin living in the scrubby weeds that were growing in the gaps in the floor and in the sagging rafters. One more good storm would collapse what was left of a roof.  
  
It was perfect.  
  
Bucky set himself up in the last stall. His gear bag as a back rest. His favourite rifle resting by his left hand. A ka-bar knife on his right. A canteen of water and a meal replacement bar. It looked like it would be one of the more comfortable nights he had spent out in the open.  
  
Physical needs taken care of he turned to the next step on the hierarchy of need. Thank you, Maslow, for helping him get his priorities in order. He hadn’t done anything with the top few levels since he had gotten his mind back. They were for better people than him. He was as secure as he was going to get for a while. He settled more comfortably against the lumpy bag. Time for his little dabble on level three. Love and belonging.  
  
He flipped open the notebook to the photo of Steve. It wasn’t just nostalgia. Seeing Steve’s face helped him remember. He needed to remember. He needed to keep Steve in his head, so he didn’t slip back into the unfeeling place. He had to stay himself. Had to finish this mission to protect Steve. These were the only people who knew how to do what they had done to him. And they wanted to do it to Stevie. He couldn’t let that happen.  
  
“I got you Stevie. No one is going to hurt you.” His mind gave him a memory of a tiny scrap of a human. Three hundred pounds of fight in a ninety-pound body. Big blue eyes glaring at him and telling him that he could defend himself. Course you can Stevie. He thought at the ghost. Better that Steve never know what he was protecting him from.  
  
He flipped a few more pages in the book to find what he was looking for. Two more pictures facing each other.  
  
On the left, a printout from a news website. Some guy who looked like Howard Stark standing at a podium in front of a shiny glass building. Behind him Steve and _Ryzhiy_ sat with their heads together. _Ryzhiy_ must have said something amusing based on the way Steve was suppressing a laugh. The headline that had gone with the article had read 'New Independent Avengers Facilities Open'. Bucky still wasn’t entirely sure what that meant.  
  
‘The Avengers' had been the group Steve had been with when something happened in New York. Bucky had been frozen for that. People said aliens had invaded. People said all sorts of things. He would believe aliens when he saw proof. Steve must still be part of the group, or maybe he had gone back to them after the fall of S.H.I.E.L.D. Why they were now independent and who they were independent from was somewhat unclear.  
  
Steve looked good. His shoulders were relaxed. Someone must have picked out his outfit for him because Bucky was sure he would have balked at how tight the blue dress shirt and grey slacks were. Not that Bucky was complaining, seeing more of Steve was better. How else could he tell if the other man was eating well.  
  
Yeah. Eating well. That was why he cared. He told the part of his mind that didn’t believe him to shut up.  
  
On the other page was a photo of the little Fox. She was looking directly at the camera. Head tilted to one side curiously. She was pretty with her lips slightly parted, eyes wide and bright. The photo was in back and white, so their colour was indeterminate. Bucky still wasn’t entirely convinced they really were as purple as his memory told him they were. Behind her, half cut out of the frame, was Steve. He wasn’t looking at the camera. He was looking at something ahead of them on the street. His face completely at ease. Holding hands with the Fox. He always looked so happy when he was with her.  
  
It wasn’t how pretty she was that was surprising about the photo. It was the source. Despite the magazine readiness of the Fox, Bucky had gotten it from a dump of Hydra surveillance. The man who had taken the photo had been found dead in a warehouse a few hours later along with one of Bucky’s primary targets. Dead with a bouquet of flowers on his chest. A gift for Bucky.  
  
Back in his safe house pressed between two books under a cinder block were a pair of dried flowers. A delicate Japanese iris and a magenta spider flower. His _Ryzhevolosaya Decochka, Ryzhiy_ and the little Fox did know what to get a guy.  
  
The girls would take care of Steve. He could finish his mission and then the Winter Soldier could disappear forever. Whether that meant Bucky would find Steve or if he would disappear too was something, he hadn’t decided yet.  
  
He was running out of time to decide. Only Six targets left to eliminate. General Truskin, the only one still in Russia. The former minister who had slipped away today. The Andretti twins in Bengal and Argentina. Colonel Karpov in Cleveland. Rumlow. Once he took care of them… he would have to decide.  
  
Bucky turned back to the picture of Stevie dressed as Captain America and propped the open book against the wall by his head. He kissed his finger and touched them to the photo. He could do this. He could save Steve before he even knew he needed saving. He could make sure _he_ was never the threat to Steve again. He just had to take it slow, so he didn’t lose himself again. One day at a time. He could do this. “Don’t you worry Stevie. I got this. You just keep yourself out of trouble punk.”  
  
He pulled his jacket closer around him. Last job for today. Rest. Rest so the darkness stopped biting at the edges of his vision and the Soldier part of his brain quieted down again.  
  
Tomorrow was a new day.


	2. The Tip Off

Amy was avoiding Steve. It was immature and petty. And not particularly easy since it meant avoiding Natasha as well. Having one of the world’s best spies for a best friend could be exhausting. All of Amy’s usual haunts were off the table. Too many of Nat’s informants knew Amy too well. She was recognisable at her preferred luxury destinations and the places she might go to get a good fight in were to obvious. Which was why she had ended up laying on the floor of a safe house in Accara.  
  
She had decided against spending time in the Balkans. If she was there, she wouldn’t be able to resist looking for Bucky and if she found him right now, she would probably have a breakdown, not something she wanted to do in front of the Winter Soldier, no matter who he was when he was in control of his own actions. Instead she had gone for the least Avengers related person she knew. Nakia.  
  
The downside of crashing with Nakia was the rudimentary living conditions. She made do without any running water, let alone air-conditioning. Even in the field Amy hadn’t subjected herself to these conditions for this long since she was a teenager. The internet was impeccable at least. Still three and a half weeks in and Amy was starting to get restless. There were only so many official targets for her on a continent with so few ties to her country and she was steadfast in her commitment to stay on official targets for the foreseeable future.  
  
The upside was no one knew her. Most people who operated at their level were on at least a nodding level of acquaintance with each other. Nakia was an outlier in the expert spy community. Because she worked almost exclusively in Africa and didn’t try to overthrow governments as much as try to keep powerful groups from remembering that Wakanda existed, Nakia didn’t have the same level of connection with the wider world. Amy wouldn’t even know her if they hadn’t literally run into each other while Amy was trying to extract her baby brother for an off books mission in Niger. A second run in, this time in Korea had made them fast friends. Nakia had taken to piggy backing on Amy’s network when she worked on different continents. Her network within Africa however, was better than anything Amy could put together. Amy hadn’t had to use any of her people since she had arrived. Which meant none of Amy’s contacts knew she was here. Which meant Nat didn’t know she was here. Which meant Steve couldn’t find her.  
  
Nakia swept into the room, throwing off the green scarf covering her hair and kicking out of her shoes. She was always at easy when she returned to the safe house. She had the utmost confidence in her counter security. They definitely worked. Amy couldn’t get a signal in or out except for though Nakia’s network. Amy trusted her, but she was bothered that she couldn’t figure out what those counter security measures were. “Do you know anything about a man named Rumlow? Also goes by cross bones. He’s an arms dealer.”  
  
Visions of Steve with broken ribs danced before her eyes. Of Steve’s head on her lap. Of a night with his arms around her. “I know _of_ him.”  
  
Nakia pursed her lips. “Hmm, I was hoping he was on one of your lists. I picked up some chatter about him while I was clearing Lagos for a trade delegation next week. It isn’t related so I’m not allowed to move on it.”  
  
Amy rubbed her face. Total avoidance had been a long shot anyway. He needed to know. “Leave it with me. I'll pass it on to a friend I know who is interested in him.”  
  
“Your friend's good?” Nakia wanted this problem to go away, but not if it put her people in danger.  
  
Amy considered. Steve had gotten hurt last time. This time he wouldn’t be alone. Between the two of them he and Nat could handle almost anything, and the rest of the team should be up to speed by now. Besides Steve wasn’t an idiot. He’d call in Tony for back up. They could handle Rumlow. “Very good.”  
  
*****  
  
Sam looked his phone curiously. What was going on? He never got unknown number calls on his work phone. Tony's system tracked NSA numbers back and gave you the department the call was coming from at least. Only one way to find out. He swiped to answer the call.  
  
“Its me. Don’t hang up.”  
  
Sam almost dropped the phone when he heard Amy’s voice. He pulled the phone away from his face, the caller ID was the same, unknown number, unknown location. He clapped it back to his face. “A--“  
  
“Don’t say my name.” Amy snapped. “Are you alone?”  
  
“Wanda is here.” Sam shot a look down the couch to where Wanda was curled around a book and a mug of tea. She had lowered both and was watching the conversation curiously. Sam didn’t know what to tell her. He was completely out of his depth here.  
  
“Well that’s alright she isn’t likely to interrupt. Do you think Tony has a voice recognition tap on this phone? No don’t answer that, he does. I’ll be fast. I’m about to give you information on someone your Captain has been trying to find for years.”  
  
Sam reeled she had found him. How had she found him? “Bar--“  
  
Amy cut him off again. “You are the worst at receiving covert information. You know that don’t you. Tell Nat you need extra lessons. Do you at least have a pen? You can answer.”  
  
“I have a pen.” Sam muttered chastised. Wanda raised her eyebrows questioningly and passed him pen and paper from the side table.  
  
“Good. Brock Rumlow is running a crew out of West Africa. Mostly small-time arms dealing to various militias. He’s got an eye on something bigger though. Next week he is hitting a target in Lagos.” Sam scribbled rapidly as Amy gave him specifics of Rumlow’s rally point and time.  
  
“What’s the target?” he asked when the stream of information ended.  
  
“I don’t have that information. You have a master tactician and one of the greatest spies of this century on staff. I’m sure they can come up with something.” Her voice grew faint as she went to hang up the phone.  
  
“Wait!” Sam was confused. Amy wasn’t supposed to call him. Not when Natasha still glared at Steve and Steve broke whatever he was holding when her name came up. “What am I supposed to tell Steve?”  
  
“That Rumlow is hitting a target in Lagos. Do you need me to go over it again?” It was said with the disappointed tone of a teacher asked to go over something the class should know.  
  
“No.” Sam rubbed his eyes. “What am I supposed to tell him about you calling me?”  
  
Amy sighed. “I don’t care what you tell him. Looking after his emotions isn’t my job anymore.”  
  
The line went dead before Sam could process what she had said. He collapsed back into the couch. “Shit.” Wanda raised her eyebrows at him. He met her look wondering how he could even begin to explain what had just happened. “Shit.”  
  
Wanda watched his face collapse. She didn’t know who had called or why, but it did not look promising from the outside. “Tell Natasha.”  
  
Sam tapped his phone against his chin. Wanda was right. That was the obvious thing to do. Natasha was way better equipped to deal with this sort of tip. Which raised the question. “Why didn’t _she_ tell Natasha?”  
  
“She?” Wanda prompted.  
  
“Ayame.” Sam figured the name was explanation enough.  
  
Wanda was suddenly very interested in her mug of tea. She had an answer to that question. She and Yuma had been talking a lot lately. “I think Natasha has been asking difficult questions of Ayame lately.”  
  
*****  
  
Chains rattled and snapped. Steve’s punching bag jumped wildly as he struck it again and again. Amy had called Sam. The man who had tried to kill him, who had helped to almost kill millions of innocent people, who had abused Bucky, was operating again. and she had called _Sam_.  
  
The punching bag swung back towards him and he caught it. Leaning heavily against the leather. He was back to using off the shelf bags, it was too light and too fragile. He tried not to think about why he only had one of his special extra heavy extra tough bags left, or why he wasn’t willing to take it out of the storage locker. She should have called him. If she loved him, she would have shown up here with plans and that sharp-eyed angry look she got when she was feeling protective.  
  
Extra back up never hurt. He could call her.  
  
Only Nat had said she wasn’t answering her _everyday_ phone. Said it while watching him intently like she thought he had a solution to that problem. He didn’t. If she wasn’t answering the phone, she wasn’t answering the phone. What was he supposed to do about it?  
  
The flip phone still tucked in his mission belt burned a hole in his memory. Nat had specified she wasn’t answering her everyday phone. But her emergency number was a different thing all together. She would always answer that. He poured cold water on the thought. This wasn’t an emergency and they didn’t need help. If his team couldn’t handle some mid-level arms dealers on their own, they weren’t worth their salt. They would be fine…. And he didn’t know what he would do if she didn’t answer when he called.  
  
*****  
  
Nat picked up her phone on the second ring. Her caller ID wasn’t blank, her phone registered Amy’s number automatically. She had to be careful when she held the phone to her face, she had hit her cheek hard when the bomb in the trust had exploded and the bruise was still tender. “I wasn’t sure if you would call.”  
  
“I almost didn’t. How are you?” Amy’s voice was soft and full of concern.  
  
Nat leaned back in her chair. It was good to hear from Aims. It would have been better to see her. There was a time she would have been back here before them. A time when she would have come to check on Natasha before she went to Steve. “We stopped them from stealing and releasing antibiotic resistant bubonic plague with minimal civilian casualties. I’ve been worse.”  
  
“And Wanda?” How many times had Amy watched the news footage now? Seven, no, eight times. The first few had been to confirm that Steve had made it out alright. The last few had been to see if she could come up with a better option for what Wanda should have done instead. She hadn’t come up with many plans that were reasonable for a beginner to think of on their own. Her leaders should have seen the explosion coming. They should have had more information so they could have anticipated it. She should have made sure they had it.  
  
“A little broken up. These were her first avoidable civilian deaths. She’ll pull through.” Nat sighed. Wanda would need to get used to the media turning against them. Nat just hoped she got used to it before but broke her.  
  
Nat waited for Amy’s next question. The silence on the other end of the line lingered. “I’m going to make you ask.”  
  
Amy mentally cursed Natasha in as many languages as she could think of. There really was only one thing she really wanted to know. “How is he?”  
  
“Not good. He blames himself of course. His nightmares have been bad. I’m pretty sure he's only had about 4 hours uninterrupted sleep in the last three days. He’s getting better about waking himself up before the screaming starts though so I can’t be sure. You could--“  
  
“No, I couldn’t. He doesn’t want to see me.” Amy answered too fast. It wasn’t that she hadn’t thought about it. It was that she couldn’t _stop_ think about it. About what she would do if he answered jut to tell her he didn’t want to talk to her. Or worse if he didn’t answer at all.  
  
“Didn’t want to see you. Things are different now.” Nat knew that if she opened the door to her office and leaned out, she would see Steve sitting at his desk staring at a blank price of paper. He had been trying to write letters of condolence to the victims’ families since they got back. He blamed himself. He had come up with the plan. He had failed to spot the vest. He was their captain; he was ultimately responsible. He wouldn’t talk to any of them about it. But he might open up to Amy. He saw her as a leader too. He would see it as a shared burden.  
  
“I have to go. You know what to do if you need me.”  
  
“Call him Aims.” Natasha was 80 percent sure Amy had hung up before she finished the sentence. She was also 100 percent sure that Amy knew exactly what she had said.  
  
*****  
  
Dai leaned against the office door frame and watched his cousin type. She was grey, the dye in her hair half washed out and her expression blank. Not the carefully neutral mask she wore so well. Blank, listless, hopeless. “You’re not answering your phone.”  
  
“I didn’t hear it ring.” Amy said without looking away from her screen. She wanted to get this article on modern experiments in biological enhancement done today. She needed to keep publishing if she wanted to keep up her network in the academic community. She had let it slip in the last few months. And she still had a threat assessment to finish for one of the other teams. And Matt had asked her to go over some mission parameters for him almost a month ago. She was better than this. She didn’t let things slip.  
  
Dai walked around her. On the far side of her desk sat her phone. Staked to the desk with a dagger through the screen. “Well there’s your problem.” He wrenched the dagger out and swept the broken bits of phone into the garbage can. “Sapphire crystal screens are expensive, you know. Did you at least call him before you smashed it?”  
  
“You don’t want me too, and he wouldn’t answer.” She was deliberately not looking at him now. Studiously staring directly at her screen where she had typed the same word four times now.  
  
Dai sighed and dropped into the chair next to her. “I don’t think you should, but I’m not the one going crazy not talking to him, and you don’t know that he wouldn’t. If you’re not going to call him, you should at least call your therapist.”  
  
Amy finally leaned back to glare at him. She was fine. She was handling it. This was why she had been hiding in Africa before she got the information on Rumlow. Gods she wished she’d never gotten that information. “I am doing exactly what my therapist told me to do. I was frustrated. I broke something. I could always start keeping a stack of cheap plates around again.”  
  
Dai stood and set a hand on the top of her head. He had to admit she was starting to make a comeback. This irritability was miles better than the disinterest of the last couple of months. “I brought you some reading material.”


	3. Friends Get You Where You Need To Be

The thick block of paper hit Amy’s desk with a thwack. Dai looked up from his reports. He had commandeered Steve’s old desk to work at. Amy had refused to let them take it away and at least this way it looked used instead of being a constant reminder of who she was missing. He looked from his cousin’s stormy expression to the accords she had tossed aside. “That bad?”  
  
Amy was staring out the open window, desperately wishing she could avoid everything to do with their stupid poorly thought out treaty. She couldn’t. Kiki and Hikarai were going to the signing ceremony. With Kiki pregnant Amy wasn’t going to let anyone else look after their security. That didn’t mean she was happy about it, especially now that she had read the full accords. “They won’t all agree.”  
  
Dai picked up the bound pages and scanned the introduction. “You mean _he_ won’t agree.”  
  
Amy swivelled her chair, so she was looking at Dai. She _was_ worried about how Steve was going to take this. Her sweet boy wouldn’t want to be beholden to a government agency, or even an inter-governmental agency. And the last time Steve and Tony fundamentally disagreed, killer robots came close to ending the world. She wasn’t willing to admit to worrying though. At least not out loud. “I mean we need to be ready for trouble.”  
  
Dai sighed and dropped the accords back on the desk. “We will be.” She was doing a better job of hiding her pain the last few days. He saw it, but to anyone else she would hardly even seem tiered. She was more engaged in her work at least. Her listlessness was getting better. She still got that far off look sometimes. She missed him and that wasn’t getting better.  
  
“Clear my schedule tomorrow. I don’t want to see anyone.” Amy shoved away from her desk and walked away from the cursed pages as quickly as she could without running. It would be a dark day on the sun before she gave anyone free reign to track her every move.  
  
Dai sighed. Maybe he could talk her into spending a few weeks in the UK again. Or going to stay with her grandmother. Getting away from the world for a little while. Possibly literally.  
  
*****  
  
N: Did you hear?  
  
A: I heard.  
  
N: Funeral is Friday.  
  
A: I know.  
  
*****  
  
He had expected Amy to call. He had been expecting her to call since he had last seen her if he was being honest with himself. When her flight landed. Or after she slept on it. Or when they had taken refuge in Katsura. Or after everything had gone sideways in Lagos... Nothing. She hadn’t talked to him in months. The only contact they had had since she had left, since he had yelled at her, had been the board meeting where she had quit. Where he had sent her away...Nat had talked to her. She had even called Sam to pass on information. Information that had led to disaster, but that was on him not her.  
  
He hadn’t called her either.  
  
He wanted her here now. Not so they could make up. He wanted to have already made up before now. Wanted her to hold him and let him cry without comment. Wanted someone to reassure him that it was fine for him to feel this lost. That he would find his way and help him do it. Wanted to not be alone when he woke up from nightmares tonight. Wanted her to wake him up before the nightmares took hold. Wanted someone to listen while he remembered. Someone who saw the real him not just the hero.  
  
Tonight would be bad. Maybe he wouldn’t bother trying to sleep. How was he supposed to get through this alone? Everyone he loved was gone. Everyone who loved him was gone.  
  
His eyes fell on the belt for his uniform, and the pocket with the phone Amy had given him. For emergencies.  
  
He wasn’t going to call her.  
  
*****  
  
Matt Winters: Hey brother. Troop transport flight to London tomorrow at 1700. Seats for you and Falcon if you want them.  
  
Steve: You sure?  
  
Matt Winters: You are one of us and we are always here for you. The thing with Kit not withstanding.  
  
Steve: Thanks brother. We’ll take that flight.  
  
*****  
  
The sleek modern hotel wasn’t the sort of place Steve would have picked on his own, but it was close to the church and the SEALs had recommended it. Distracted, he studied the minimalist wood and glass desk, the whole thing was insubstantial, was anything _not_ insubstantial these days.  
  
Sam touched his elbow and nodded when the girl at the end finished serving another guest and they could approach.  
  
He had to blink several times before he could speak. “Hi. I need rooms for the next couple days. Can I ask what you have available?”  
  
“Captain Rogers. Someone called for you earlier. We have you and Mr. Wilson in one of our junior suites, is alright?” The girl smiled softly and pulled a leather folder out of a drawer.  
  
Steve accepted the folder in a daze. Inside were two room keys, a list of hotel services, and a welcome letter. A peace offing from Nat or Tony. Probably both. Nat would have guessed what hotel they would end up at, she might even have told the SEALs where to send them. And Tony had the resources to secure them a suite without too many questions. “I.... Yes. That’s perfect. Thank you.”  
  
*****  
  
Steve slumped down on the couch with his bag at his side. Sam patted him on the shoulder reassuringly. It had been a log plane ride, but at least everyone had been quietly understanding. He left Steve staring at the fruit basket that dominated the coffee table and went to explore the rooms.  
  
The ‘junior' suite was still extensive. Two bedrooms with king-sized beds. A kitchen dining room combination with a table large enough for six. And a large sitting area.  
  
A pair of nondescript garment bags hung in the open hall closet. Sam inspected them curiously. One had Steve’s name on it and the other was for him. He unzipped bag the bag with his name. A plush black wool suit greeted him along with a crisp white shirt and a black silk tie. The red iris on the label wasn’t logo he recognised, but the craftsmanship was obvious. The fabric was the softest he had ever felt.  
  
Someone had anticipated their every need. Sam half expected room service to show up at the exact moment he started to get hungry. Assuming Steve ever got hungry, he hadn’t actually eaten anything that Sam had seen since he had received the message.  
  
He headed back to Steve. He was still on the couch, but he had extracted an orange and was eating it methodically. That was good. That was a start.  
  
*****  
  
“Hey brother. Hey Sammy.” Brian hugged them both. Lingering over the second hug to absorb as much comfort as he could. It was hard to raise his arms above his shoulders in the red wool tunic of his dress uniform, but he managed it. It was worth it to have his arms around Sam again.  
  
“Not a pallbearer?” Steve asked distractedly. Brian had been related to Peggy somehow. He couldn’t remember how off the top of his head. A nephew?  
  
Brian shook his head. Steve looked bad. “Left that for you boys out of uniform. Honour guard for me today.”  
  
Steve nodded made what he hoped were appropriate comments returning the condolences. He saw the rest of the pallbearers forming up in front of the church and made his excuses. Peggy had asked him to do one last thing for her. He needed to hold himself together just a little bit longer so he could.  
  
Brian slipped his hand into Sam’s. “Is he going to be alright?”  
  
Sam shook his head. It had been a bad few weeks _before_ Steve had lost Peggy and loosing her had hit him hard. “No idea.”  
  
“Are you?” Brain asked rubbing a thumb along the scruff of Sam’s beard. The funeral wasn’t the only thing going on right now. No matter how much it felt like the rest of the world should hold still while they mourned Margaret Carter. He might have lost his godmother and greatest champion, but Sam was losing his purpose in life.  
  
“Better now that I’ve seen you.” Sam hated to admit how attractive he found Brian in his dress uniform. He had wondered what the tall blond would look like in the red tunic since Amy had introduced them at Christmas. The answer was like a dream. A thought that it was _not_ appropriate for Sam to be having right now. He hoped that someday he would get to see it again in happier circumstances. He would look even better with a smile in those pretty blue eyes instead of unshed tears. At least he could be here for his boy at the same time he was here for his best friend. And maybe he could come back for a longer visit once he got Steve settled. Not like he was working anymore.  
  
Brian pulled Sam into a hug again. He was only a little desperate for the contact. “Come to my place tonight. Something tells me he is going to crash when he gets back to the hotel and lays down. Come over and… Just let me spend some time with you. I miss you fly boy.”  
  
“I’ll try to get away. Hang in there, pretty boy.” Sam hugged his boy hard. He knew the had been hard on Brian too. Peggy Carter had been his godmother and the only member of his family who had really accepted his sexuality. Brian had loved her to pieces. He had made a point of going to see her every time he was in the states no mater how out of his way it was. He had even been the one to guard Peggy during the DC Winter Soldier episode. It made total sense that he wanted someone to cuddle tonight. Sam would be there for him if he could.  
  
One more quick squeeze and Sam left to find his seat. Steve would be forming up with the other pallbearers and Brian needed to take his place at the church doors. They could hold each other later. Brian was right. All indications were that Steve would be catatonic after the wake.  
  
*****  
  
Steve felt the blonde’s eyes burn into him. She really was pretty. Not inhumanly beautiful, but purely and honestly pretty. And fierce, there was no denying that either. He should have seen that sooner. Fierce, but without the underlying broken and jagged edges that… some people… had. Peggy was gone, dead and out of reach. Amy was... But Sharon. Sharon was here, and she reminded him of so much of Peggy. Maybe he should give her a chance.


	4. Signing The Accords

Natasha zeroed in on Amy as soon as she entered the room designated for speeches. A number of dignitaries and their entourages were milling around waiting for things to start. Nat couldn’t deal with any of them just now. She didn’t want to hear about how brave she was, or how good it was that her team would have proper over site now. She didn’t want to deal with well meaning diplomats and their earnest ideas for things the Avengers could deal with. She needed a distraction and her friend happened to represent a non-accord related problem for her to solve. Amy couldn’t avoid her here.  
  
“You didn’t go to the funeral.” Nat kept her voice low so the rest of the room wouldn’t overhear. She wouldn’t mention who Steve had been talking to when she had left. If that was anything it was just a rebound. No way Sharon could hold Steve’s attention for more than a month or two. She didn’t have the same spark the people he really loved did. Peggy’s spark. Her _Otets’_ spark. Amy’s spark.  
  
Amy winced. That had been a hard decision, it hadn’t felt right to go. Not with things with Steve as they were. He needed space to mourn Peggy without complication. “I sent flowers. Matt was there to represent the family.”  
  
Nat nodded. She had expected Amy to have a ready answer. She always expected Amy to have an answer. The same way she always had an answer. “I saw. I also saw that Sam and Steve got new suits.”  
  
Amy was only half paying attention to Natasha now. Something in the parking lot was bothering her, she just couldn’t place what. Security was exactly where they should be. None of the diplomats that were still trickling in were acting suspiciously. “I suppose he would need one, most of what he owns are blue or grey. Not really the thing to wear to a funeral.”  
  
Nat snagged onto Amy’s wording. _He_ , not _they_. So, this wasn’t a completely lost cause. “They were excellently tailored suits. And you know the strangest thing. Sam took off his jacket while he was waiting for the car to take them to the wake and I could have sworn the label had Fredrick's logo on it. That red iris is pretty distinct.”  
  
“Hmm that is weird. Although, Fredrick does make lovely suits.” Amy moved closer to the floor to ceiling windows, carefully inspecting the street. What was it that was making her neck prickle?  
  
Natasha ignored the activity that had Amy so enthralled. Keeping her gaze fixed on Amy’s face. She wasn’t just using this as a distraction from the accords… She wasn’t. It was important. “Almost like someone who is close to Fredrick and has their exact measurements memorised arranged for the suits to be in their hotel room when they got to London. I wonder if it was the same person who arranged that hotel room and got them on the military transport flight with all those SEALs. Hey, isn’t that how your brother got there?”  
  
Amy pushed her hair back from her face. It never stayed up when it was freshly dyed. “It might have been. I’ve been busy, I haven’t been paying much attention to my brothers this week.”  
  
Nat pushed harder. “I wonder if that person realises that while Steve was too distracted by grief to pay attention to all the things that just sort of happened for him this week, he might start to think about them after everything calms down. And when he does, he might have questions.”  
  
“Whose Van is that?” Amy’s look of tense distraction changed to one of intent focus. That was it. The van hadn’t been there on her last pass twenty minutes ago, and there was no news crew hovering around getting ready to broadcast.  
  
Nat flicked her eyes to the parked vehicle. “One of the news crews. They were all searched before they were allowed inside the perimeter. You’re getting off topic.”  
  
“I don’t like it. I’m going to have them check it again.” Amy pivoted and stalked away from the window. Indecently leaving her friend and the awkward questions she represented behind as well.  
  
“How much of this is you being paranoid about security and how much is avoiding talking about him?” Nat called after her.  
  
“About 50/50.” Amy shot back as she walked away. The crowed parting around her like water.  
  
Nat sighed exasperated. She should have started meddling earlier. Maybe if she had, Amy would have talked Steve into signing and the accords wouldn’t be tearing her family apart.  
  
When an aid called for her to look at some papers, she replaced her political mask and moved back into the flow of people.  
  
*****  
  
Amy waved off another paramedic. It was getting harder now. The rate of people being pulled from the rubble had slowed and more of them were finding time to check on the walking wounded. She would get checked out later. For now, the rough triage bandage she had submitted to when she first got out would do. Kiki and Hideyoshi were safely on their way to the hospital with Dai to look after them, that was the important thing. Besides, her bleeding had stopped... Mostly stopped…. The shirt she had changed into was black. It was fine.  
  
She spotted Natasha sitting stunned on a bench. The redhead looked less worse for wear than Amy felt, but she had probably only had herself to protect from the blast while Amy had been shielding Kiki. Pregnant princesses trumped person safety.  
  
Amy sat down with less grace than she would have exerted with someone else. Nat wouldn’t send her away as long as she had work to do here. “Has anyone claimed it yet.”  
  
Nat shook her head. Ears still ringing. “No. They have security footage of the Winter Soldier setting the bomb though.”  
  
“The Winter Soldier? This doesn’t match his MO at all. Way too random, no way to make sure the target actually died. There was a perfectly good building across the street to set up. Kill our snipers and take their position, you’d have a full view of the dignitaries. If you just wanted to evacuate the building, you didn’t need anything so flashy. A gas leak would have been more efficient. I also don’t see Bucky doing this on his own. It also raises the question who got him back under control. There’s what? Three people left alive who could do it?” Amy looked at Nat who nodded in confirmation. She would know. They had killed almost half of the potential candidates themselves, and Nat had been tracking the others with intent interest.  
  
“Four, maybe five. We never could figure out what all the Minister knew.” Nat confirmed.  
  
“Send me the tape I want to look at it myself.” Amy was babbling. Tying to talk her mind into focusing on the task at hand rather than giving in to shock. Blown up and trapped in a pile of rubble was too familiar for her to be entirely okay.  
  
“CIA is running the investigation.” Nat scanned the crowd. She wanted to believe Amy. She wanted to think this wasn’t her _Otetes’_ fault. The evidence was pretty damning though. “Talk to Carter, the blonde by the command tent.”  
  
Amy winced internally. Of course, Sharon Carter would be the lead agent. Brian had warned her that Sharon and Steve seemed to be getting close during the wake. Bri's 'are you going to be alright if he starts dating' text had been an unwanted punctuation to her day. But Sharon didn’t know who she was, and she was trained not to give anything away. Might as well suck it up and add another layer of unpleasant to an already bad day, and wouldn't it have been nice if they were the worst part? She gave Nat's uninjured shoulder a squeeze of thanks before winding her way through the crowd. Ignoring the slow trickle of warm liquid down her back.  
  
*****  
  
Quick introductions and a confident air got Amy into the command tent. Sharon knew her by reputation and was happy to let her look at the footage they had.  
  
Amy watched the hooded figure walk away from the van four times. It definitely looked like the Winter Soldier, but something itched at the back of her mind. Something about the way he moved. “Something feels off about this. Mind if I take a copy and run some analytics?”  
  
Sharon waved invitingly to the computer. “Be my guest the more eyes we have on this the better.”  
  
“Any leads?” Amy leaned against the desk as she waited for the files to transfer onto her phone.  
  
Sharon sighed. Her bosses had been on at her to comb through the tips that were coming in. Hundreds of calls in the last hour. All of which needed to be checked. None of which meant anything. “A few. One good one. Berlin is putting together a strike team.”  
  
“Its going to be awkward as hell when the Germans run into Captain America.” The files were loading excruciatingly slowly. Amy wished she had the kind of relationship with Agent Cater that would let her just _tell_ her what Steve was going to do and what she needed to do to help him. Maybe she knew someone on the strike team? She would have to check.  
  
Sharron looked at the other woman confused. “Why would they run into Steve? He didn’t sign the accords. No one is going to ask him to go.”  
  
“Setting aside the fact that the target is his best friend?” Amy scoffed, ignoring the clenching in her chest when the other women used Steve’s first name so casually. Being jealous wouldn’t help him. Besides, she had no right to be jealous. Steve wasn’t anything to her anymore.  
  
“He has faced off against the Winter Soldier before. He knows that he is the person with the best shot of taking him down with minimal loss of life. Or he would be if he had all the available information going in. As is he will probably end up following the Germans in and mopping up.” Amy disengaged her phone. Gears were turning behind Sharon’s eyes. She hoped it would be enough. “Well, that’s not my mess to clean up. Thanks for this. Let me know when they capture or kill him.”  
  
Stepping out of the tent, Amy took a deep breath. That was all she could do for him right now. He shouldn’t be going in blind, that had to be enough. She would deal with fallout after Steve captured him. Hell, Steve was good. If they gave him a little time, he might be able to talk Bucky down and get him to come in peacefully. That would be for the best. Right now, she needed to get a better look at the recording in her pocket, get back up on the ground so she didn’t have to worry about Kiki and Hideyoshi, call in a team of lawyers. It was harder to send them away when they were there from the beginning than to never let them in…. And maybe get some medical attention. Whatever was stabbing her under the shoulder blade was starting to overcome her ability to ignore it.


	5. Bucky's Bad Day

There was something off about today. Not being able to figure out what, was starting to drive Bucky mad.  
  
He had a routine when he was at his favorite safe house. He got up, he went to the market, decided what he wanted to eat that day based on what was fresh, bought a newspaper. He came home, put his groceries away, did a sweep of his apartment to make sure no one was following him. In the afternoon he packed up his laptop, went to the café three blocks away, sat in the back corner by the kitchen, ordered the special, and spent a few hours working.  
  
It was the kind of routine that lead to people recognising you and writing you off as harmless. The café owner thought he was a writer working on a novel. He kept joking about making sure Bucky, or Christen as he knew him, didn’t make him look bad if he based a character on him. The weekend girl at the produce stand had slipped him her number last week.  
  
It was a good routine, at least most days it was good. On bad days he huddled in his safe house and ran through his escape strategies. Or tried to smoother his screams with a pillow.  
  
Today had seemed like a good day. He’d gotten almost a full night’s sleep. He'd whistled while making breakfast. This was his favourite shirt, soft, and stretchy enough that it almost never caught on the plates of his arm. The weather was good, sunny but not warm enough that people questioned his long sleeves and gloves. The produce girl had smiled at him, so obviously she wasn’t upset that he hadn’t done anything with her number.  
  
But something was still _off_. Something he couldn’t place had his hackles up. He felt like he was being watched… more than usual. Like people who hadn’t blinked at him yesterday were whispering about him today. Maybe today wasn’t a good day. Maybe today was the start of another break. He didn’t think it was. His head felt fine. His vision wasn’t blurry.  
  
An ambulance shrieked by, setting his teeth on edge. The sirens weren’t helping his nerves. He told himself they weren’t for him. That they had nothing to do with him. The back of his neck prickled anyway.  
  
He ran through some extra mental checks as he waited to cross the street. None of the other people waiting were people he had seen earlier in the day. There were no strange cars idling. No one was loitering pretending to be on their phone but actually watching the crowd. He made eye contact with the new stand vendor, hoping for a reassuring nod of recognition and greeting.  
  
What he got was too much recognition. Instead of the vague awareness of 'you belong here, I know you' he was expecting. A look of panic flashed through the other man's eyes.  
  
Bucky hurried across the street. Maybe it wasn’t him. Maybe the new stand vendor owed money to the Mafia and on of their enforcers was behind him. That would explain everything.  
  
There was a paper spread on the counter. A blurry photo dominating the front page. A blurry photo of him. How could it be a photo of him? Words from the headlines stuck in his mind. Bomb. Suspect. Information. Call. It didn’t make any sense. He hadn’t lost any time this week. He couldn’t have done anything in Vienna. Someone was framing him. Which wasn’t even the worst part.  
  
They were looking for him. The vendor had recognised him. They had found him. He had to get out of here.  
  
He dropped his groceries and bolted for the alley. Bucky sprinted down the narrow alleys and side streets. Ducking out of sight as sirens wailed along the main streets. He just had to get back to his apartment and grab his bag. Then he could disappear.  
  
There was an abandoned missile silo in Estonia. He could lay low there for a few months.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky’s day was not getting better.  
  
Steve was standing in his kitchen. _Steve_ was standing in his kitchen. Steve. Was. In. His. Kitchen. Steve had found him somehow. Steve was reading his journal. And there was nothing he could do about any of those facts because he had passed three S.W.A.T. teams on the way here, and if he didn’t get moving, they were going to corner him.  
  
A tiny stir in the air told Steve he wasn’t alone anymore. He turned around slowly. Bucky had appeared next to the bed. Looking wiled eyed and skittish, but more himself and alive than Steve had seen him this century. “You know me?”  
  
“You’re Steve. I read about you in a museum.” It wasn’t inaccurate. He had gone to the Smithsonian and read all about ‘Captain America’ and his brave friends. It just didn’t cover all the other answers to that question currently yammering for attention in his head. You’re Steve and I’ve been in love with you since I was a kid. You’re the only good thing I remembered for a very long time and sometimes you still are. Protecting you has been the reason I get up in the morning for the last two and a half years. And you weren’t supposed to be able to find me, because finding me puts you in danger. Bucky was trying very hard not to panic and if he was honest with himself it was only almost working.  
  
Steve kept him movements slow and no threatening as he set down the journal and moved towards Bucky. In his ear Sam was keeping up a running commentary on the movement outside. They needed to move, he needed Bucky to trust him at least a little. Amy had said he remembered. So why was he acting like a stranger now? She had also said he was staying away to protect Steve. That had to be it. But that strategy wouldn’t work anymore. It was Steve’s turn to protect Bucky. Which meant calling him on his bullshit. “I know you’re nervous. And you have plenty of reason to be. But you’re lying.”  
  
Shit. He knew. How much did he know? What had the little Fox told him? Bucky opted for avoiding the question rather than actually lying. There was only one reason that Steve would be in his kitchen today of all days. He could clear up that misconception at least.  
  
“I wasn’t in Vienna. I don’t do that anymore.” ‘That’ in this context being large scale bombings. Bucky would reluctantly admit that he hadn’t completely broken the habit of killing people. Although in his defence, they had all deserved it and the girls had clearly approved, even if Steve hadn’t.  
  
Sam sounded in Steve’s ear again. The German’s were in the building. They didn’t have time for this little dance of obviation. They needed to move _now_. “Well the people who think you did are coming here now, and they’re not planning on taking you alive.”  
  
“That’s smart. Good strategy.” Bucky resigned himself to fighting his way out. Steve obviously wasn’t with them or he would have led with that. He couldn’t just vanish and leave Steve to face the force that was coming for him. The idiot would get himself shot. There was no other option. It had to be clear that Steve had tried to capture him, and he had gotten away. Which meant he was going to have to fight off at least on team. He should have stayed in bed this morning.  
  
Steve watched the set of Bucky’s shoulders change. He wasn’t going to come quietly. “This doesn’t have to end in a fight Buck.”  
  
Bucky flexed his metal hand. Steve didn’t know. Steve still thought people generally tried to do the right thing and only hurt each other by accident or when their backs were against the wall. The world had never been that kind. And it had only gotten meaner in the last hundred years. His actions had helped to make it meaner. He could hear booted feet on the stairs. “It always ends in a fight.”  
  
Five seconds wasn’t enough time. Steve was running out of plans to get them both out of her safely. He couldn’t lose Bucky. Not today. He had lost too much this week. He needed to keep Bucky at least safe. “You pulled me from the river. Why?”  
  
“I don’t know.” He didn’t know why he loved Steve enough that it had broken through everything that had happened to him. He just knew that he had to keep him safe at all costs… Fuck. He was going to get shot again, wasn’t he?  
  
Where the hell were _Ryzhiy_ and the little Fox?  
  
Steve knew that look. It was the same look he gave himself in the morning when he told himself not to call Amy. “Yes you do…”  
  
The rest of his realisation was cut off by Sam screaming ‘breech’ in his ear and a flash bang crashing through the kitchen window. After that things started to move too quickly for Steve to consider Bucky’s micro expressions.


	6. The Best Laid Plans

Amy hissed in pain as the doctor irrigated the laceration on her shoulder to wash out any other small pieces of debris. He had been cleaning and patching her up for the past twenty minutes and she was starting to get restless. Only Dai's stern look from his perch next to the beds kept her still for this last bit. Left to her own devices she would have ordered the doctor to bandage the area after he finished removing the larger objects. The two-inch piece of wire had been the worst, with it gone her vision hardly even blurred when she raised her arm. Testing that had earned her and especially harsh glare from her cousin. She was fine really. She was also grateful that she had Dai in her life to look after her when she didn’t have the capacity to do it herself.  
  
She was less grateful that he didn’t approve of her plans to rescue Steve. He would help her. But he didn’t approve.  
  
The rest of the room’s occupants were studiously ignoring Amy’s discomfort as she hunched around the back of a chair and submitted to medical treatment. On an ordinary day the hospital would probably have insisted on doing this in a surgical theatre. Certainly, she wouldn’t have been allowed to stay sitting up in the prince and princess's room with her team perched around her. Today they were almost grateful that Ayame wasn’t fussing about proper procedure.  
  
The doctor conveniently didn’t speak Japanese so they could exchange information while he spoke. Her team was taking turns relaying the report from the team responsible for the winter soldiers capture and the new information coming of the command in Berlin. Yuma had just announced that the convoy with the prisoners was on the move and scheduled to be back in Vienna by morning.  
  
“They can’t bring them back here. We have no resources to help them here.” Amy closed her eyes considering her options and shutting out the sensation of ointment being spread on raw flesh.  
  
“Where then?” Kiki prompted when the silence stretched on. She was hooked to a fetal heart-rate monitor, but so far it looked like everything was alright. The little prince would be fine. Kiki would be on bed rest for the next three months as a precautionary measure. Which Amy knew she would hate, but which would also keep her nice and safe while Amy helped clean up the mess Steve had made.  
  
Amy took a moment to appreciate that her team didn’t even question her need to help them. Just accepted that Amy would do anything she could for Steve no mater what. The moment also gave her thoughts a chance to crystallise. “Berlin. It will be an easy sell. The CIA has more support there too. Don’t let them directly connect it to us. Call the Tai ambassador’s security and let them know that the plan is to bring the people who blew him up back to the city where he’s trying to recover so they can escape and finish the job. Slip Berlin into the conversation as an alternative. They are very protective of their princes even the minor ones. They will do the hard part.”  
  
*****  
  
Amy carefully angled herself so Steve wouldn’t see her face as he was escorted through the lobby. She couldn’t guarantee that he wouldn’t cause a scene if he saw her. She couldn’t guarantee that she wouldn’t do something stupid if he did. “I _understand_ that Wakanda has a claim on him. I want him.”  
  
“He killed our king.” The ambassador spat incredulous.  
  
Amy spoke over any additional arguments he might have. She had the upper hand here and she intended to exploit her advantage. “He almost killed our crown prince and his pregnant wife. Not to mention a princess of the blood and several close allies.”  
  
“King trumps prince.”  
  
“Look, who do you want to give custody of one of the worlds deadliest assassins to? A technically advanced nation who has put a significant amount of time and energy into researching enhanced persons and their containment? The same nation where the worlds foremost expert in the Winter Soldier currently resides. Or the lovely but reclusive goat farmers of Wakanda?” Amy made eye contact with the Wakandan ambassador as she said it. She knew Wakanda wasn’t as underdeveloped as they pretended. It was a gamble. She didn’t know exactly what they could do. But she was willing to risk that they wouldn’t be tearing down the veil just for a chance to be the ones to lock up the Winter Soldier.  
  
The ambassador blinked first. Something roared in Amy’s chest. At least something was going right. She was still the alpha bitch wherever she went.  
  
If she could just get Bucky somewhere safe, Steve would be able to talk his way out of everything else. She was sure of it.  
  
A mental institute in the States was not safe. Too many points of entry. Too many people who would want to keep him sedated. Too many others would want to try and use him. Katsura was safe. She just had to get him there.  
  
*****  
  
Amy smiled at Sharron as the blond crossed the atrium. She fell into step companionably. She was leaning pretty hard on what little relationship they had build in Vienna. It might all blow up in her face, but Carter was her best bet for sympathetic help on the inside. “Bringing them in was reasonably painless. I mean aside from the fact that pretty Plexiglas box will _never_ hold if he puts his mind to getting out of it, but we can’t expect people to actually _read_ any of the reports we write on these things can we.”  
  
Sharron smiled grimly. “I have to give Captain America a receipt that says we confiscated his shield, but you’re right it could have been worse.”  
  
Amy assessed the reaction. She didn’t seem to mind Amy’s assumed familiarity. If anything, she welcomed having an understanding female to talk to. No doubt she had just dealt with a bunch of angry men yelling about collateral damage. Two injured German Special Ops and a handful cars didn’t sound like a bad trade off for Captain America, Falcon, the Winter Soldier _and_ the Black Panther.  
  
Amy sighed dramatically. Time for a little nudge. Steve would need information. “Poor guy, he must be going crazy. Not knowing what is going on. Not being able to help with the investigation or the interrogation.”  
  
“You think he’d be able to help?” Sharron seemed to be considering the idea.  
  
“I think he the best resource we have, and he’s being wasted.” Amy waved a hand casually. The last thing she wanted was Sharron coming up with the idea to invite her along to talk to him, and she could see the idea forming behind her eyes. “Anyway, I’ll let you get back to work. Find me latter, I’ll buy you a coffee. I suspect we will all need a significant amount of caffeine before the day is done.”  
  
*****  
  
“How are you holding up?” Amy leaned casually in the door to the office Natasha had sequestered herself in.  
  
Nat pressed the heels of her hands into her eyes. She had a headache coming on. The past twenty-four hours had been among the worst in her life and it was a high bar. “The Winter Solider is in custody and Tony is going to talk Steve into signing the accords so we don’t have to formally arrest him.”  
  
“Mhmm, and how are _you_ holding up?” Amy handed her a cold water and a bottle of Advil. She had brought them thinking her friend would have been ignoring her personal comfort in favour of getting them through one crisis after another.  
  
The fact that Amy had bled through her dressings an hour ago and still hadn’t told anyone in no way made this the pot calling the kettle black. She had needed those files and climbing in the window was the best way to get them. Popped stiches be damned. Dark coloured shirts were a blessing. Fredrick was going to kill her when he saw her laundry.  
  
Nat chugged the water and swallowed the pain killers. The silence stretched. Both women waiting for the other. Nat finally broke, crushing the bottle in frustration. “Why couldn’t he just sign the damn treaty?”  
  
Amy wrapped an arm around her friend’s shoulder comfortingly. She understood where she was coming from. Nat had worked in the grey area surrounding governments her entire life. It wasn’t fair that as soon as she found a family and stepped into the light someone tore it all apart. She should have been able to live in the light for years.  
  
Amy wouldn’t lie to her though. As unfair as life was, lying wouldn’t make it any kinder. “I didn’t sign it either Nat.”  
  
“What?” Nat hadn’t even considered that possibility. Amy was here. She had to have signed. What kind of inane organisation would invite an assassin of Amy’s calibre, one who was clearly more than human, one that the US government actively _knew_ had enhanced abilities, to the summit and not have her sign?  
  
Amy exhaled deeply and leaned back into the corner of the couch, careful to keep the pressure off her injured shoulder. “Nobody asked me to sign. Because acknowledging my existence isn’t politically expedient.”  
  
“Your country signed.”  
  
“Because that _was_ politically expedient. Did you see the rebuilding clause? What country wouldn’t want to be able to count on the other signatories to help pay for reconstruction if they are invaded by aliens? But I guarantee that we aren’t the only ones that have tucked something like my family in the closet for now. You think everyone is just going to go along with letting some ‘taskforce’ decided when to use us. Because the UN makes the best decisions on things like that? And why would they even need to. I mean really, they keep using us in the shadows when we get caught, they disavow us, and the rest of the world works to clean everything up.” She pulled up short. She had been about to lean back into the couch. Which would leave a bloodstain she didn’t want to have to explain. A tickle in her lower back reminded her that she really should duck out and redo her dressings, at least if she wanted to continue pretending she wasn’t injured. “Steve hates playing politics. He was never going to sit down and let the international power players turn him into a pawn. That sort of thing is how he ended up dressed as a giant flag in the first place.”  
  
Nat sighed. Steve wasn’t the only problem they had. “He’s my _Otets_. I don’t want to see him stuck in some black site prison. I don’t think anyone will be safer if they try to lock him up.”  
  
Nat look at her friend who was nodding but not outwardly concerned. A little distracted but not _worried_ the way she would be if Steve and Bucky were on their way to some pit. “You have a plan?”  
  
Amy sighed. This entire situation was exhausting. She would do anything for Steve and just as much for Natasha, but she really needed a vacation after this. “I’m trying to get custody. We can keep him safe. You can come stay at the School. Steve can come stay at the school. I spent almost five years without going home regularly. I can do it again. Once we prove his innocence, we can find you all somewhere else to live.”  
  
It was a good plan. She spent about half her time in the field now. There was nothing stopping her from upping that percentage. Nothing stopping her from living with her grandmother in Inari or with Dai in Tokyo when she was in Japan. She could even go back into academia if she really needed something to keep her busy and safely away from Steve and the love of his life. Maybe Oxford. Or King’s College. Bri would take her in again. And there were other more drastic options she could fall back on if none of those panned out.  
  
Natasha chose to ignore the details of Amy’s plan. Steve wouldn’t let her abandon her home for him. In all probability Dai would force her to sit down and talk things out before Steve could move in. It was interesting that Amy’s plan hinged on Bucky being innocent though. “You still don’t think he did it?”  
  
“Neither do y--“ The lights went out.  
  
Nat did the math on the odds that the city would experience a blackout just after the winter soldier had been taken into custody. They weren’t good. There was a much better chance that this was someone breaking him out. With the three people who would be here for _Bucky_ all accounted for, that meant someone who thought they could control or at least direct the Winter Soldier. And so far, their plan seemed to be working. “Shit.”  
  
Amy followed Nat to her feet. Clearly on the same page. “Get to him. Make sure he’s contained.”  
  
Amy wasn’t about to throw herself straight into the fray. That’s where Steve would be. She would be more useful blocking his logical exit. Which meant she needed to get to the roof… And get a hold of Dai.


	7. Who Put All Of These Fans Next To The Manure Pile?

A: Plan C or whatever letter we are on now. And stay out of the building until I call you. I don’t want to risk you going hand to hand with the Winter Soldier.  
  
D: Copy. Remember you can’t do anything against his metal arm.  
  
A: Not my first dance.  
  
*****  
  
Fuck. The damn fake doctor had gotten away. ‘Bucky’ was back to kicking Steve ass instead of looking vaguely confused. Sam was going to go ahead and call this a very bad day. The kind of bad day he would have gotten a medal for back in the military. He was pretty sure that this time he would be lucky if he managed to stay out of jail.  
  
Sam started at the grip on his arm. A strong hand drew him out of the flow of evacuating people and into a sheltered spot along the wall. With the chaos around them abating he had time to actually look at his… rescuer? Captor? It wasn’t a crazed Hydra assassin he had been afraid of. It was Dai.  
  
He thrust a set of keys into Sam's hands before he could say anything. “Blue car around the corner. The warehouse on the corner of Gaußstraße and Goslarer Ufer.”  
  
“What?” Sam wasn’t keeping up. He only understood about two thirds of the words Dai was saying and the ones her did understand didn’t entirely make sense in that order. Why couldn’t people just ask him to do easy things. Like wind speed calculations. No one ever asked for wind speed calculations. He could do those.  
  
Dai looked at him understandingly and started again slower. “Cap just broke out with his wrongly accused best friend. We know that was at least partially accidental, but we also know that he probably isn’t going to just waltz back in and let them take Bucky away without a trial like they were planning to. So. Keys to the blue car around the corner and the warehouse on the corner of Gaußstraße and Goslarer Ufer. Use them.”  
  
Sam looked from the keys in his hand to the man in front of. “Is Amy going to be waiting in the warehouse?”  
  
“No.” It was a simple statement of fact. No information on where she would be. No explanation of why she wouldn’t be there.  
  
“And if we need help?” Sam pressed. Amy would be a valuable asset even is someone had to play go between for her and Steve.  
  
“Don’t call her.” The same flat delivery. Dai wasn’t leaving room for negotiation on this. Someone needed to set boundaries.  
  
Sam wondered who had decided that a clean car and a place to hide out was all the help they could offer. Steve would have a million questions about this once they regrouped. And now Dai was leaving without answering any of them.  
  
“What are you guys going to do?” He needed to be able to tell Steve something.  
  
“Figure out who blew up our friends and how he got close enough to activate the Winter Soldier.” Dai called over his shoulder.  
  
Fuck. Sam swore internally. Maybe Steve would be too distracted to wonder where Sam had found a car and a conveniently abandoned warehouse…. There was always hope.  
  
*****  
  
Amy tapped her phone against her lips. She hated reacting instead of acting. At least everyone seemed to have forgotten that she was anything other than a head of security. There were at least seven other people with that title waiting in small clusters around the control room.  
  
Dai wove his way through the bustling crowd of CIA and Interpol agents to take a spot on the wall next to her. Amy tapped her fist against his affectionately, he was upset, but her was her family. “You gave Sam the keys?”  
  
Dai sighed. It wasn’t that all of this was a _bad_ plan. It was that they didn’t need to have a plan at all. This wasn’t their fight. The rest of the team was leaving Vienna in two hours. They could grab a helicopter, be on that flight, and make it home in time for dinner. “I did.”  
  
Amy could feel her cousin’s tension. She knew what he wanted. She couldn’t leave until she knew they were safe. This was something she had to do. “Did they get out of the water alright?”  
  
They were staying then. Sometimes Dai wished she really was emotionless as people thought she was. “They did. The Winter Soldier was unconscious when Steve dragged him out. You’re sure he’ll be himself when he wakes up.”  
  
“Cognitive recalibration wipes the Soldier’s programming. It was always the biggest issue with controlling him.” Amy closed her eyes. She wondered how many other people knew that. Natasha for sure. Probably some of the other analysts. She didn’t need to bring it up. They would be looking for a person not a weapon.  
  
“Thank you for not following them in.”  
  
Amy shrugged. If she’d been closer maybe she would have been able to do something. But the Winter Soldier had defied her expectations and gone for the helicopter. She had thought he would run. She had been on the wrong roof. And before she had been able to get to the right roof Steve had shown up and crashed the helicopter.  
  
When Bucky had grabbed him, and they had gone over the edge… Her heart had stopped. It had taken all her will power not to dive in after them. She couldn’t burn her position here though. Someone needed to keep an eye on the situation.  
  
There were too many variables. She wished she knew who had started this. Then her plans might be less speculative and more substantial. There had to be something she could do that was more productive than standing around watching people try futilely to figure out where Steve would go. “Good. They’ll need there gear eventually. Bucky too, if they didn’t find any of his old stuff in his safe house, and it sounds like they didn’t…. we’ll have to slip some in for him. I’ll see about getting close enough to Carter that she thinks it is her idea to steal everything, arrange to have a conversation about how they are doomed with out their things.”  
  
“Anything else?” Dai kept his voice level. Letting his anger show would only irritate her.  
  
“Yeah.” Amy turned to face him. She knew he wasn’t entirely happy about this, but she couldn’t abandon them. Either of them. “I want that backpack. Whatever is in there is important enough that he grabbed it while running. I want to know what it is and be able to give it back after. Anything you think I should know.”  
  
Dai rolled his eyes. She was already working on how to convince agent Carter to let her into the armoury, he could tell. “I don’t approve of any of this.”  
  
“Duly noted.” Amy levered herself off the wall as agent Carter started for the exit. “Distract Nat for a couple minuets.”  
  
*****  
  
A whole country in one night. Bucky’s description reminded him vividly of Ayame. He was sure that if she put her mind to it, she and her Aunts could probably destabilise a whole country over night. And be crowned Empress of it by the end of the week. These were not pretty Foxes though, even ones made of silk and steel. These were brain washed assassins under the control of a man who was willing to blow up the UN to find one person. Something told him they wouldn’t be as benevolent as the Foxes.  
  
They needed help. Steve weighed his options. “If we call Tony…”  
  
Sam shrugged off the idea. “He won’t believe us.”  
  
Steve sighed. Sam was right, nothing was ever that easy. “Even if he did…”  
  
“Who knows if the accords will let him help.” Sam knew he was just confirming Steve’s worst fears.  
  
A memory was bothering him. A memory about Amy. She had said something, once hadn’t she? About there being more than one. About the frequency and signature changing. The weekend he had spent with the SEALs…. When he had first told her he loved her… He couldn’t remember exactly what she had said, all he could see were her elegant hands and how beautifully she gestured when she was passionate about something. He might not remember details it still counted as outside conformation. Bucky was telling the truth and they had to act on it. How could they act on it? Just the three of them. No gear. No back up. “We’re on our own.”  
  
Sam tipped his head noncommittally. The Avengers were out. Amy was off the table. He wouldn’t drag Brian into this to save his life. But they still had a few options. “Maybe not.”  
  
Steve stared at Sam, heart in his throat. Say it Sam. Say we should call her. Let her sweep in and make everything better. The Foxes might be able to overthrow a country in a single night, but stopping the toppling of empires is what they were really trained for. What Amy’s whole life revolves around. If Sam would just give him this excuse to call her… She would come. For him. For this she would…. Wouldn’t she?  
  
Sam shrugged. “I know a guy.”


	8. Getting The Band Back Together

“Not sure you understand the concept of a getaway car.” Sharon eyed the battered car suspiciously. She had expected a sleek inconspicuous town car. An Audi or a Mercedes. The little Volkswagen didn’t look like it would make it ten feet with the three burly men in it.  
  
Steve chose to ignore that. He wasn’t sure where Sam had gotten the car, but it had served them well. Not a single cop had so much as blinked at it as they drove around the city. They had been completely anonymous so far.  
  
More important was the threat to Sharon. She wasn’t involved in this. Not really. “They’re going to come looking for you.”  
  
“I know.” She shrugged. Captain America was worth the risk. She trusted him. If this was what he thought was right, she was sure it was.  
  
She was risking everything for him. And Amy was nowhere to be found. She would be here if you called her. Steve told the small voice in his head to shut up. He hadn’t had to call Sharon. She had called him. They could have been good together. And didn’t they match better than he and Amy did. A pare of optimists against the world. Amy was such a pessimist. He shouldn’t be comparing the two this much. It was probably a sign.  
  
“Thank you, Sharon.” He leaned in slowly. A taste. Something to get Amy out of his head. To get... Everything... out of his head.  
  
Her lips were soft. She smelled like flowers and sunlight. Her hand stroked the back of his head sweetly. It was a good kiss. It was an okay kiss. It could have been a great kiss if he didn’t have the memory of Amy burned into his skin. Sharon kissed like she wanted you to learn more, a pure first kiss.  
  
Amy kissed like a challenge. Even her sweet kisses demanding you prove your worth. Prove you deserved her affection.  
  
“That was…” Sharron was breathless. The kiss hadn’t been anything like she thought it would be. He had kissed her like he was drowning, and she was his last chance at air.  
  
“Late.” He was right. They could have been something. Before he knew what it was like to kiss someone who didn’t think he was the purest hero ever born, who challenged him even as she supported him. He should have kissed Sharon back then. Everything with her would have been so much simpler than things with Amy had ever been.  
  
Sam and Bucky were smirking at him from the car. Thoughts of Amy could wait. Deliberately suppressing thoughts of Amy could wait. He needed to save the world and Bucky first.  
  
…And figure out what to do about the fact that Bucky’s knowing grin was currently causing more butterflies in his stomach than the kiss with Sharon had. The little voice in the back of his head told him that he knew exactly why it was having that effect.  
  
It didn’t help that the voice reminding him that he had had this revelation already was Amy’s.  
  
One thing at a time. Save the world. Find somewhere Bucky would be safe. _Then_ examine his feelings and figure out what to do with them. He had a plane to catch.  
  
*****  
  
“Suit up.” Steve ordered the team. He would feel more confident in his uniform. It always helped him forget his all too human emotions and pretend to be the hero everyone thought he was.  
  
“Hey Sam?” Clint called adjusting his quiver. He had some questions and Steve wasn’t the person to ask.  
  
Same wandered over, leaving Steve and Bucky to check each other’s buckles and fastenings. “Yeah.”  
  
“I can’t help but notice a couple people missing from our team. Unless Amy sided with Nat.” He didn’t think Amy had. There had been a jet with a flight plan cleared to Germany waiting for him at La Guardia and he didn’t think Nat or Tony had sent it.  
  
Sam bristled protectively. “Bri just lost a close family member. I’m not dragging him into this.”  
  
“That’s cool. He wasn’t the person I was most interested in.” Clint adjusted a strap. He was all the sniper they needed. But another ninja was always a good idea. “So, where is she?”  
  
Sam had wondered when someone would ask about Amy. Steve hadn’t. Steve had made a very deliberated effort to avoid asking about her. Sam had seen him hesitate several times before they had seen Sharon. He hadn’t had that look since the kiss, but Sam had caught him fiddling with something in his pocket. It didn’t take a genius to figure out that it was the compass and fox statue he used as a good luck charms. “As far as I know she is… neutral in all this.”  
  
“You called and she said no?” Clint frowned. ‘No’ didn’t really seem to cover it. Amy had to have a reason if she wasn’t getting involved. She would have thought about it. Weighed both sides before making a decision. And Clint would eat his own bow sting if she had come down in favour of the side who wanted to low jack her.  
  
Sam shook his head. It wasn’t that simple. Nothing ever was when Steve was involved. “I was specifically told not to call her.”  
  
Clint rolled his eyes. That would do it. Proud idiot. They needed all the help they could get. “Steve’s an idiot. We should call Amy.”  
  
Sam shot a look over his shoulder at Steve and Bucky. They seemed to be struggling with Bucky’s jacket. Good. Sam was not in the mood to deal with Steve’s reaction to Amy not wanting to talk to him. “Steve’s not the one who told me not to call. It was 100% Dai. Gave me that death trap of a car. Told me not to call her for this.”  
  
Clint checked the tension on his bow string. That was disappointing. It would have been nice to have Amy on their side. Even if she couldn’t use that freaky mind power of hers, she was still a menace and a match for Nat. “She probably has a plan to rescue us after this all goes sideways. Nat would.” Nat probably did. At least for him.  
  
Sam shrugged. That was one possibility. “Or Steve broke her heart, the car was a guilt thing because she gave us the intel on the Lagos mission, and she doesn’t want anything to do with any of us.”  
  
“Maybe.” Clint nodded thoughtfully. By all accounts it hadn’t been a great break up. He knew Nat and Amy still talked, but Nat was on the other side of all this. Still, he didn’t think Amy would let anything happen to Steve, or the people he and Nat cared about. No, she was lurking in the background somewhere. “But then who will pay for my lawyer?”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky carefully unpacked the bag with gear for him in it. Unlike the others he hadn’t been captured wearing what he normally wore in the field. He didn’t even keep his field gear in his Bucharest safe house. Sharon wouldn’t have been able to ‘liberate’ his gear. Someone, he didn’t think it was Sharon, had taken care of him though. Filling a bag with a reasonable facsimile of what he usually carried. The black fatigue pants and combat boots were familiar if new, probably picked up from army surplus like his had been. The guns were all Belgian made, he had used the same make and model before, they had been properly cleaned and maintained. The knives were the real gems. Whoever had supplied him had packed five different styles, all razor sharp, with perfectly wrapped grips. Bucky was a little in love with the Fairbairn-Skyes they had included. The British combat daggers had always been works of art and this one was a particularly good example. Sharp enough to cut the wind, someone had lovingly oiled the whole thing to a soft mat black. It fit in his hand like it was made for him. Bucky strapped it to his leg without hesitation.  
  
The jacket was more confusing, stiff but soft, and strangely cushy. Bucky fingered the black fabric curiously. “What is this made of?”  
  
“Nylon, spider silk, and a non-newtonian gel. Some of the western militaries are developing them, they are supposed to be light weight and flexible as well as bullet proof. This one looks like the German model.” Steve tried not to think too much about how he knew that. Amy had owned one of the companies that made the spider silk fabric. She had been proud of how much progress they had made in the last year. They had sent her photos of the prototypes on a regular basis and she had pestered him to upgrade from the dragon scale bullet proofing in his uniform.  
  
Bucky flexed his left arm a few times. The edges of the plates plucked at the fabric. “The sleeve is a problem.”  
  
“Pass me a knife. I'll help you cut it off.” Steve held out his hand with a half smile. He hated everything about what was happening. Everything except having Bucky back.  
  
Bucky flipped the ka-bar knife end over end and offered handle to Steve. He was keeping the Fairbairn-Skyes. Steve could fight him for it later. He shouldn’t be as calm as he was right now. He shouldn’t be as centered as he was. Something about having Steve here, about Steve being real, helped him stay focused and in his own head. The little Fox had been right. He should have found Steve earlier.  
  
He wondered about the little Fox. She had said Steve was her friend. They had been photographed together fairly regularly. But no one had even suggested they call her. Where was she in all this?  
  
*****  
  
It wasn’t the most depressing apartment Amy had ever been in. But it was up there. There were hardly any personal items at all. Behind her Dai leaned against the door to the balcony watching her. The police were waiting on forensic experts from Germany and had left the room unoccupied for the time being. There was a guard in the stairwell. He wouldn’t hear anything unless they made a fuss.  
  
“We need to figure out where they are going. Then we need to figure out where we can take them after. Katsura is off the table, if Ross doesn’t have a team there by the end of the week, he is a bigger failure than I thought.” She stepped around an evidence marker on the floor. Ross showing up was bound to be a problem either way, but the Clan had been alerted to the risk, they would have everything cleaned up and looking above board by the time any investigators arrived. She went to pick up the journal on the corner of the counter. Something pulled under her shoulder blade and she switched hands.  
  
Dai frowned and shifted so he could watch her more closely. “Amy.”  
  
Amy ignored Dai. It wasn’t a warning. He must have noticed her favouring her left hand. She replaced the journal with a decoy and moved on to the bookcase. “I’m thinking South America to start. Who do we know in the Olivera cartel?”  
  
She was definitely tying to compensate. “Amy, did you pop your stitches?”  
  
She considered ignoring him again. It wasn’t worth it. He had gone along with everything so far, but she knew how he would react if he thought helping them was hurting her. She loved him because he looked after her when she couldn’t do it herself. No one would thank her if she didn’t let him now. “….Yes.”  
  
“Gods fucking damn it. You are supposed to tell me right away when you do that sort of thing.” Dai stormed over and pulled down the back of her gi. The fabric clung, stuck to her back by blood that had been trickling sluggishly for some time.  
  
Amy shrugged the jacket back up. “I’m fine. It’s only a little blood loss.” She was hardly even lightheaded, and if her heart was beating faster that it should be that was the stress.  
  
“I am going to slapping that man so hard.” Dai rubbed his temples. Why couldn’t they just hole up in front of the news and watch this from a safe distance.  
  
“One thing at a time.” Amy shoved the pillow into the bag and zipped it closed. “We need to get them to safety. Then you can slap him.”  
  
*****  
  
Dai had grumbled all the way back to their cheap hotel room. Muttering about Steve being responsible for Amy’s being in this condition and Amy being an idiot for letting herself stay that way. He hadn’t calmed down until she had shed her top and submitted to treatment. Cleaning away the drying blood and picking out the old sutures.  
  
Amy winced as the needle bit into her skin. “I think we need one of the Aunts.”  
  
Dai considered. She was probably right. Having a second person with the ability to control people along with them would be helpful if they were going to do this. And Amy wasn’t about to let this go. “Yuuki?”  
  
She shook her head. Yuuki was good, but Amy needed more than technical back up for this. “Sakura.”  
  
*****  
  
Steve and Bucky jogged to a stop in front of Natasha. The slow run exaggerated Bucky’s lopsided gate. His Swagger. Fuck. Natasha should have recognised his walk anywhere should have been able to tell when it was him walking in her sleep. Had the explosion given her a concussion that she had missed it?  
  
That was what Amy had been trying to tell her.  
  
It couldn’t have been him in the footage. Whoever had planted that bomb hadn’t walked with a swagger. Whoever had planted the bomb didn’t have the arm. Didn’t even know how the arm made him move. They had never seen him in person or even a good video of him outside of combat. Which meant they were working off written reports and still images. Which meant it was all a set up.  
  
“You’re not going to stop.” It was a statement. If it really was a set up and someone really was after more Winter Soldiers… If the person who had framed her _Otets_ knew where to find the other Winter Soldiers….  
  
“You know I can’t.” Steve said it reluctantly. He didn’t want to have to hurt Natasha. Especially not in front of Bucky. But if that is what it was going to take to get them out of here, he would. There were bigger things at stake.  
  
Nat bit her tongue. They couldn’t. She didn’t have a faster, better plan to stop a mad man like that. If anyone stood a chance of stopping him, it was Steve and her _Otets_. “I’m gonna regret this.”


	9. On The Run Again

“Are you incapable of letting go of your ego for one god damn second?” Nat was going to throttle Tony in a second. If he would just take a moment to think about the big picture here. To ask himself _why_ Natasha had let them go, then they could start talking about the next step. There was still a real possibility that Steve and her _Otets_ weren’t going to be able to stop a whole pack of Winter Soldier’s and if they couldn’t the rest of the team needed to be ready to move. Sam, Wanda, and Clint were all on their way to the Raft Prison. They needed to start talking about how to get them transferred somewhere else. They couldn’t just leave their friends in that place. Especially Wanda, the only way the grunts at NATO would be able to control her was to keep her drugged out of her mind. There were a million things to do. None of which were helped by Tony accusing her of being untrustworthy.  
  
Tony ground his teeth. This wasn’t about him. This was about the future of the Avengers and the safety of the world. Natasha had put both in jeopardy with her stunt in the hanger. Thankfully he didn’t have to be the one to turn his friend in. “T’Challa told Ross what you did. So, they’re coming for you.”  
  
Nat’s resolve hardened. They were coming for her and Tony hadn’t done anything to stop them. He would rather let her be arrested than ask if there was more going on here than he could see. He would rather alienate everyone who cared about him than admit for even a second that he might not be entirely in the right. “I’m not the one who needs to watch their back.”  
  
Natasha didn’t run from the balcony. Running was inherently suspicious. She did walk quickly and turn on the audio jammer she kept in her pocket. Most of her options at this point were bad. That was fine she was used to bad options. What was the least bad?  
  
Call the last of her friends who wasn’t currently convinced she should be arrested, under arrest themselves or on _everyone's_ most wanted list and see if they would be willing to commit treason for her. This sort of thing was supposed to stop happening when you went to work for the good guys, wasn’t it?  
  
She was back in the residence wing, emergency cell phone in hand before she had even finished her though. She punched in Amy’s emergency number without looking.  
  
She answered on the first ring. “Go.”  
  
“I have a problem.”  
  
“You have my attention.” Amy was as always unphased. Her voice was calm, the sound of people in the background fading as she either waved them to silence or moved away.  
  
Nat laid out the facts evenly as she stuffed a handful of clothes and documents in to a pretty but impractical backpack. Impractical was inconspicuous. Impractical had lots of areas that no one questioned being thick enough for a hidden pocket. “T’challa told the suits that I betrayed them at the airport. They are on their way to arrest me. Tony is pissed. Which means he’s burned all the covers he knows about.”  
  
“Which is pretty much all of them?” Amy asked. Nat could practically hear her mind working. Evidently Amy was behind her regardless of where they stood on the accords.  
  
“Which is all the ones good enough to get me out of the country in a hurry.” There it was. The real problem she needed Amy’s help with. Everything else she could probably handle for the next twenty-four hours. All she had to do was not get caught for that long and the search area would expand beyond practical limits and she could go to ground and find a way to connect with Steve. She still had responsibilities to take care of. Even if Tony seemed to have forgotten what was most important.  
  
“There is a bug out bag taped to the back of the bedside table in Steve’s room. His side of the bed.”  
  
And there was the solution. Nat let her heart rate settle adrenaline ebbing. With clean documents and the kind of untraceable supplies Amy was sure to keep in a bug out bag everything else was a minor detail.  
  
“She’s a little shorter than you.”  
  
Like that. The covers exact height was something she could fudge. She typed a few command lines on the computer terminal in the corner and pulled the hard drives out of her personal computer and her laptop. “I’ll wear wedges and try for a male TSA agent.”  
  
“There are coloured contacts in there, but the eyes might still be an issue.” Amy said into the silence of Nat working.  
  
At this point Nat knew Amy was coming up with these obstacles half as a method of making sure Nat stayed calm. “A little contouring, I should be able to make it work.” Nat patted under her desk until she found the envelope of thermite dust and a pair of magnesium strips taped there. She had disabled the smoke detectors in her room shortly after moving in, so it would be a few hours before anyone noticed the fire she started to melt the hard drives and burn the documents she wasn’t taking with her.  
  
“Good. Mongolia. Someone will be waiting.”  
  
“I love Ulaanbaatar this time of year.” Nat said drily in place of goodbye. Natasha’s everyday phone followed the hard drives into the fire.  
  
Natasha pocketed her emergency phone at the same time she let herself into Steve’s rooms. She hesitated, wondering if there was anything here that he would need. No. She wasn’t even sure she would be rendezvousing with him in the foreseeable future. Amy might just as easily hide Natasha at the school in Katsura until the heat died down as send her off with Captain America.  
  
The bug out bag turned out to contain documents for a Nico Minoru as well as a man named Johnathan Storm who was a dead ringer for Steve. Amy must have assumed that if she had to run form here, she would need to take him with her. Nat took both sets of documents, just in case.  
  
The bag also held a variety of disguise materials, including the promised contacts. There was even a 3D printed gun. Single shot, plastic, and Easily disassembled into parts that could pass through an X-ray it was the perfect last-ditch weapon. Nat stuffed everything into her bag and let herself out one of the third story windows on the far side of the building. Sam had a tracker-less dirt bike in a shed near the woods that would be her best escape option.  
  
Bike to the city. Hop a train for Canada. Fly from Toronto to Istanbul. Istanbul to Ulaanbaatar. The whole trip would take just under a day if she made her connections.  
  
*****  
  
Amy leaned back in the co-pilots seat of the jet and closed her eyes. Her mind racing with the mental calculations. This was going to complicate the timeline. They would make it work. That was why she stayed flexible. There was no time to get more team members. They were already in the air over China. They would have to make this work with just the three of them.  
  
“That was Nat?” Dai looked at Amy. She was stressed. He couldn’t blame her, if they had to get Nat it was going to complicate things.  
  
“Yeah.” Amy ran a hand through her hair. This changed things. She had a tentative plan. Dai wasn’t going to like it. Hell, she didn’t like it. She swivelled in her seat to look at the third person sitting calmly in the back of the jet. “Auntie. Natasha will be landing into Ulaanbaatar. Would you go pick her up?”  
  
Sakura smiled serenely at her nice. She was a bright-eyed fox. If she would just believe in herself, she would find she could move worlds “Of course, little Fox. You take care of our brave soldiers.”  
  
“Thank you, auntie.” Amy closed her eyes. If Steve could just hold on. If he could just not die for a few more hour. She could get them somewhere safe and figure out a long-term solution. She could get them the ending they deserved.  
  
Dai looked at Amy again. She couldn’t be serious. If Sakura went to pick up Natasha, that left just the two of them to go to Siberia, and if he was playing medic, and he would be, “That leaves--“  
  
Amy cut him off. “I know what that leaves. I will be fine.” She didn’t need a lecture right now. She needed to get through the next twelve hours without having a panic attack. Something she wouldn’t be able to do if he kept fussing at her.  
  
*****  
  
“This is a terrible idea.” Dai stared out at the snowy plain. Amy was just starting to recover from Steve breaking her heart. She was still madly in love with him, otherwise they wouldn’t be here. It wouldn’t take much for him to push her back over the edge.  
  
Amy joined him at the foot of the ramp. “I know.”  
  
A pair of figures waited near the entrance to the bunker. One hogtied in the snow the other sitting on a low boulder engaged in a conversation on his phone. The terrorist and T’Challa. Some quick lip reading on Amy’s part determined that he was talking to his ambassador, discussing what looked like terms for handing Zemo over to the Americans.  
  
Dai did a double take that was not who he was expecting to see. “Is that?”  
  
Amy couldn’t help the wicked smile that found its way onto her face. She did so love competence. And the Black Panther was nothing if not competent. “So, this is where he ended up. Come on Night Wind. Let’s go introduce ourselves and see what we can find out.”  
  
Dai fell into step just behind Amy’s right shoulder. At least someone had the situation under control. Maybe Prince T’Challa had already dealt with Captain America and the Winter Soldier too so they could just go home. Dai would put up with Amy living on his couch and interfering with his love life for a month all over again if it meant she wasn’t about to do something stupid like going on the run with Steve and the man he was in love with.  
  
They waited a few yards away while he finished his call then approached slowly.  
  
“Your majesty.” Amy bowed deeply. Her hand resting loosely on the hilt of her sword.  
  
T’Challa inclined his head in return. Recognising the woman who had antagonised his countries ambassador so. Nakia knew her somehow. He would have to ask exactly how the next time he saw her. “Your grace.”  
  
“I see you have captured our terrorist.” Amy eyed the restrained man dubiously. He seemed resigned to his capture. Not an attitude she trusted.  
  
“I have.” T’Challa said standing to talk with her on more equal terms.  
  
“Alive.” She prodded Zemo with the toe of her boot. He didn’t react at all. She definitely didn’t trust that. She didn’t trust anyone who accepted failure. “Not sure that’s the choice I would have made.”  
  
“He can not answer for his crimes if he is dead.”  
  
“True enough.” Amy turned away from the captive. She had bigger fish to fry just now. “Are any of the others still alive in there?”  
  
“The original Winter Soldier, the Captain, and Stark all were when I left. The other Winter Soldiers were all dead before we arrived.” T'Challa said, watching carefully for her reaction.  
  
Amy relaxed a hair. That was something at least. Her biggest concern had been the other Winter Soldiers. Given her track record with the original she hadn’t been sure she could handle a pack of them. She let herself look back at the entrance. Maybe Steve could still talk his way out of this. Maybe she didn't need to do this...  
  
T'Challa's next word reinvigorated her dread. “The Captain and his friend are fighting Stark.”  
  
Amy snapped her head around to face the prince. “Fighting Tony? Why? Even Tony has to see that Bucky is innocent.” That was why Zemo was resigned. He didn’t think he had failed. The little research she had managed on the way here said he had done all this to bring down the Avengers. If Tony was physically fighting with Steve, he had succeeded.  
  
“Of the attack that killed my father? Yes. Of the death of the Stark parents… that is more of a grey area.” T’challa shrugged and looked back towards the underground complex. “A shame. He does sound very remorseful.”  
  
Amy closed her eyes. She had counted on Tony being rational and hyper analytical. Part of her had also hoped that Tony _knew_ who had killed his parents. And Steve accused her of not telling people things. They could win. But if Tony was against them the search would be more extensive than she had anticipated, and the rewards would be higher. She would be hard pressed to match the kind of carrot and stick the world governments would be able to offer her underworld contacts. What they really needed was someone with full sovereignty and no former connection to Steve… Maybe even someone who had recently had a very public disagreement with the boys…  
  
She turned her attention to the man across from her. Flexibility was key. Sometimes serendipity was her best ally. T’challa had accepted Bucky’s innocence with surprising grace. All the reasons she hadn’t wanted Bucky in Wakanda when the Wakandens had thought he was guilty made it the perfect place to hide him now that they knew he was innocent. “They will need asylum somewhere more… private than I can offer it.”  
  
T’challa nodded in understanding. “I may be able to help with that. First I would like to get our friend here to the proper authorities.”  
  
“Did you need a ride?” Dai asked. He kept his voice level and his eyes fixed on the doors. He was with Amy. Kill the terrorist. What good was he alive? Maybe he was just in a vicious mood with Amy acting so recklessly.  
  
“I have a plane of my own.” T’Challa did something to the bracelet he was wearing, and a small jet shimmered into view.  
  
There was a suggestion of an African mask to the styling of T’challa’s plane. Amy appreciated the elegance of the sleek lines but was slightly unnerved that she couldn’t figure out what method of propulsion it was using. It obviously had vertical take off, otherwise there was no way it would be able to perch on the ledge above entrance like it was.  
  
“I will meet you once I finish with the Americans.” T’Challa assured her, hauling Zemo to his feet by one arm.  
  
Amy grabbed the man’s head. Wrenching it around so he was looking directly at her. He might be resigned now, but she wanted to be sure he would stay that way. No one needed the complications of him trying to escape. She poured a liberal amount of terror into him, just enough to make him whimper. “Behave yourself, or I’ll be the one to come after you next time. I’m not as nice as his majesty.”  
  
Amy stayed stone faced as the jet departed. She had the seeds of a plan growing in her mind. The only problem was no one else would like it and it would take all her skill and will power to get through it.  
  
“What now?” Dai asked. He had a vain hope that her answer might be ‘go home and forget all of this’.  
  
Amy tightened her grip on the hilt of her sword. She had come this far. She was going to see this through and save Steve and Bucky. “Now, we wait.”


	10. Everyone Needs Rescuing Sometimes

Steve limped slowly out of the silo, supporting Bucky as best he could. When they got to the surface, he would call Amy. Apologise for everything. She would come get Tony and then…. And then….  
  
A pair of dark figures waited just outside the blast doors. One bundled to his ears in a heavy parka, hood pulled up mittens tucked into armpits. The other with a large coat draped over one shoulder and sword held loosely in an ungloved hand, apparently indifferent to the cold.  
  
Amy.  
  
Steve stumbled to a stop. He was hallucinating. He must be more injured than he thought. He was tired, and sore, and now he was hallucinating. She couldn’t be here. He wished she was here. She would know exactly what to do. Why hadn't he called her before?  
  
Amy sheathed her sword in a fluid motion. Just the two of them. No pursuit. “Don’t look so surprised. Did you think I wouldn’t come for you?”  
  
Steve hadn’t thought she would come. Hadn’t even considered the possibility that she would find him. “A--“  
  
Amy cut him off before he could say anything stupid. “Dai will take you somewhere safe and ditch the jet. I'll meet you once I’m done here.”  
  
Dai dropped his hands to his sides, hands balled into fists. “I still think--“  
  
“I understand your concern.” Amy cut him off too. She didn’t want to discuses her feelings about Steve, or what she was about to do. She wanted to get them somewhere safe so she could stop worrying about him. “But it wouldn’t make any sense. Officially we think there are several live Winter Soldiers in there. There is no way I would let you walk into that alone. You have to take the boys. I have to deal with Tony.”  
  
Dai narrowed his eyes at her. She didn’t want to confess the reality of her being here? Fine. There was more than one objection to her plan. “Do you remember what happened the last time we left you alone in a place like that?”  
  
Steve was lost. He hadn’t called her. Why were they here? Why weren’t they trying to capture them? Or at least convince them to come in. He wasn’t surprised that they would send Amy after them. She was more than qualified for this sort of thing. But she wasn’t acting like she was on a mission. At least not a mission to capture. He was pretty sure if she wanted to capture them they wouldn't be standing around like this. It sounded more like she was on a rescue mission. Could Amy be here to rescue them? …but he hadn’t called her…  
  
“Better than you do, thank you.” Amy snapped. Of course, she didn’t want to go in. Nuclear silos had never been attractive to her, and personal experience had done little to change that. It was just over a year since the accident. She still felt the radiation prickling at her skin half the time. But it had to be her. She pivoted to face the other men. She needed to alleviate everyone's fears so they could get on with it. “Are there any missiles left down there?”  
  
The abrupt tone shift threw Steve off completely. “What--“  
  
Bucky kept up. She was going into the complex. She needed intel. She wasn’t actively attacking them. He might as well just give it to her. Then maybe the bigger threat would leave. “No. They moved them all. 97, I think. They woke me up to carry the cores.”  
  
Amy’s shoulders relaxed slightly. That was one worry off her list. It was still a very long list, but that was one. She wasn’t walking into another active nuclear site. “Thank you, Barnes. You are the only reasonable man here. Which is impressive considering you are going into shock right now.”  
  
Dai rolled his eyes. Amy was overreacting. He turned to get a better look at the soldier so he could better correct her diagnosis. “He’s not-- Shit.”  
  
He was wrong. Amy was right. That was shock. Barnes was ashen. Steve’s arm was the only thing keeping him anywhere close to standing. Steve wasn’t in much better shape and his grip was slipping. If they both went down, Dai and Amy wouldn’t be enough to get them on the plane.  
  
Dai switched into medic mode, the coat was whipped off Amy’s shoulder and wrapped around Bucky. A quick triage showed no external injuries, although he wasn’t looking forward to finding out how much damage losing the arm had caused.  
  
“Stabilise him.” Dai snapped without looking at Amy.  
  
“I’m sorry about this Barnes dear. I promise I will ask first next time.” Amy cupped Bucky’s face between her hands and poured relaxation tinged power into him.  
  
Bucky let out a shuttering breath and half melted into Steve. His pulse stabilised. His breathing evened out. He felt like he’d spent hours coming down from battle fever instead of stumbling out of the silo five minutes ago.  
  
Steve relaxed as Bucky relaxed. They were going to be alright. The wind blew the smallest hint of Amy’s perfume into his face. Or maybe that was just his memory. Either way a tentative feeling of safety started growing in his chest.  
  
Dai got them both moving toward the jet. He might not be Captain America’s biggest fan right now. But if Amy said keep them alive, he would keep them alive.  
  
Amy stopped Steve with a hand on his arm. He turned back to her. Foot skidding on the ice slick ramp. Amy’s heart flipped. Her boy looked so lost and broken. She wanted to wrap her arms around him and hold him until everything was better. She couldn’t. If everything was going to get better, she had work to do. “Where’s Tony?”  
  
Steve blinked at her perfectly smooth face. Geisha Amy. Commander Amy. No emotions. “He’s in the exhaust chamber at the bottom of the silo. Amy, I…. He's… I don’t know how hurt he is…”  
  
Amy softened around the edges. He was still her Steve. Always sweet. Always worried about other people. She squeezed his forearm gently. “I’ve got him. You just worry about getting your boy to camp safely.”  
  
“Amy…” Steve hesitated. He didn’t know what he wanted to say. He wanted to dip his head and kiss her, feel the steadying press of her lips against his.  
  
“Are you going to get in here or am I going to leave without you?” Dai growled storming down the ramp to glare at them both. Amy was looking at Steve like she wanted to forgive him. She was not allowed to forgive him. Dai hadn’t put her back together twice for Steve to break her a third time.  
  
Amy’s hand disappeared from Steve’s arm. The moment gone.  
  
Steve closed his mouth. He really had no idea what you said to someone who had come to rescue you after you had broken their heart. Especially when their very protective cousin was staring him down. Giving Dai a wide birth, he dragged himself into the jet.  
  
Dai bumped his fist against Amy’s and boarded the jet. He was mad. He still loved her. A sad wave from the cockpit and they took off. Leaving Amy standing alone in the snow.  
  
*****  
  
Amy found Tony exactly where Steve had said he would be. Crumpled at the bottom of an exhaust shaft. She took a moment to survey the destruction before he saw her. Scorch marks scared the walls where Tony’s blasts had gone astray. Shattered chunks on concrete and his abandoned shield were the evidence of Steve’s involvement. Bucky had left less of a trace on the environment, which was to be expected. He was the Winter Soldier after all. But if the gouges on Tony’s chest plate weren’t caused by metal fingers Amy would be deeply shocked. The idiots had been surprisingly evenly matched. It was a minor miracle that none of them had died.  
  
Tony struggled most of the way to his feet swaying dangerously. Amy lunged in to catch him before he fell and did more damage. Tony let her brace him while he got his legs under him. He didn’t seem surprised to see her as much as resigned.  
  
“Are you here to punch me too?” Tony asked his knees giving out again. “Because I’m kind of over it.”  
  
“No. I’m here to take you home.” Amy made him sit against the wall and started a preliminary examination. “Any abdominal pain? Tingling in your extremities? I need to get this chest plate of to check for a collapsed lung.”  
  
“I don’t have a collapsed lung.” Tony grumbled.  
  
Amy raised an eyebrow. “Oh yeah? Friday told you that despite the fact your suite is offline?”  
  
“Point taken.” Tony said popping the manual clasp on the body of his suit.  
  
The suite went into a pile beside Tony. Amy poked and prodded him searching for injury. Despite Steve’s fears he seemed largely intact. Significant bruising. A broken wrist. A couple of cracked ribs. But nothing life threatening.  
  
She pulled out a large string bag and bundled Tony's suit into it. A metallic glint in the corner drew her attention.  
  
“Hello beautiful.” Amy picked up Bucky’s scorched arm, she weighted it in her hands. It was an impressive piece of engineering. It may have been forced on him when he lost his individual identity, but it had been his arm for decades. She would take it with her. If he didn’t want it back, she would figure out something to do with it. She slipped it into her belt and cinched it tight.  
  
“You going to take the shield too?” Tony asked from his place against the wall. He had been tracking her movements around the room curiously.  
  
“You can keep it. Never know when you might need some vibranium.” She flipped the disk into the air, catching it neatly in her free hand and offering it to him. Given where it had fallen Steve had left it deliberately. And if he hadn’t… well she hadn’t forgiven him for what had happened between them and he rather deserved to lose something he cared about.  
  
Tony scoffed, accepting the shield and adding it to the bag with his suit. “Not here to clean up his mess then?”  
  
Amy sighed. Steve had managed to make an impressive mess. Dwelling on that wouldn’t achieve anything though. “You may have missed it, but Steve and I broke up.”  
  
“How did you know we were here?” Tony asked trying to stand again.  
  
She caught his arm and steadied him. Stubborn men. Why couldn’t he just stay down until she was ready to help him.  
  
“I’m very good at my job.” She was being short with him she knew. But she had opened her stitches and was bleeding down her back, _again_. There was going to be a very unpleasant lecture from Dai about not overdoing things when she got back.  
  
He seemed mollified enough for Amy to drape his arm over her shoulders and grab the bag with his suite. Everything was already beaten to hell, so she didn’t feel bad about dragging it.  
  
Tony’s thoughts coalesced around the time she finally got them moving. “So why come get me. We were never close. The only thing we had in common was Steve and now neither of us have him.”  
  
Amy stopped. Letting him lean against a wall so she could look at him. “Do you want me to leave? I came because I still owed Steve a favour. He might be mad at you now but when he cools down, he will appreciate the fact you aren’t dead in a hole in Siberia, and we’ll be even. I don’t like having a balance on the books. Not one that’s not in my favour.”  
  
“Natasha said something like that to Loki.”  
  
“Yeah?” Amy said dragging him through the door to the elevator. “I knew there was a reason we got along so well.”  
  
*****  
  
Getting Tony checked into the hospital in South Korea was easy enough. Both of them had connections and he was clearly injured. Less than an hour from when they landed, Tony had a private room and full staff of nurses assigned to him.  
  
Amy stepped back into the room halfway through his initial exam. She had managed to bully a resident into cleaning and reclosing her shoulder without admitting her. She was feeling significantly better now that that she wasn’t bleeding. “Oh, stop wincing. It’s like you’ve never broken a rib before.”  
  
Tony pouted, submitting as the nurse put a cast on his wrist. “Just because I have doesn’t mean I enjoy the experience.”  
  
Amy rolled her eyes. At least she was almost done here. A few more minutes and she would be on her way back to Dai and the boys. “Pepper is flying in, she should be here in a few hours. I made you an appointment with a couple’s therapist as well as one with my personal therapist for when you’re back in the States. Keep the appointments Tony. Delegate some of your emotional labour to someone who can deal with it.”


	11. A Temporary Sanctuary

Eight hours after Dai confirmed landing in Mongolia and programmed the auto pilot to crash it into the Caspian Sea, Amy’s jet descended a few feet from the camp. She surveyed the camp. Two neat round yurts perched atop a low hill. The cleared space in front holding a fire pit complete with posts and a stand for spit roasting. Clear sight-lines for miles around. The only ground access was a rough dirt track a few miles away. It was a good location. Secure. She took a deep breath. They could handle this.  
  
Three figures emerged from the tents the smallest jogging towards her, the largest walking slowly. The third, Dai, leaned against a pole and crossed his arms. Amy hand signed a quick confirmation that she had completed her part of the mission, he nodded and ducked back into the smaller tent.  
  
Amy snapped her fingers as Yuma jogged close enough to speak. “Report.”  
  
Yuma pulled herself into a sharp parade rest. “No sign of surveillance. All chatter is quiet. Lady Sakura checked in an hour ago. She’s safely in Ulaanbaatar. The Winter Soldier is asleep in the main tent. Captain Rogers is--“  
  
“Captain Rogers is right here and can make his own report.” Steve said patting the girl on the shoulder. His eyes fixed on Amy.  
  
“Yuma go home.” Amy ordered, spine stiff. She had known this moment was coming. She still wasn’t ready. “Cover for us as long as you can. Official diplomatic business, yada yada, you know the drill. Kiki will help. I'll be in touch.”  
  
Yuma snapped another salute and jogged onto the jet.  
  
Amy looked at Steve’s chest and swore. “Idiots. I am surrounded by idiots.” She drew her dagger and stalked towards him determined.  
  
Steve didn’t have a chance to react before the blade was flashing towards him.  
  
A deft twist of the wrist at the last second sliced the stitches holding the star in place rather than Steve’s flesh. Amy quickly broke open the moulded ornament and wrenched out the wires inside. She dropped the whole contraption on the ground and stamped on it hard to make sure everything was completely destroyed. “That should have been done while you were still in the jet on the way here. I know Dai has a jammer on the camp. But it was still reckless.”  
  
A tracker. There was a tracker in his suit. He had known that. Ditching his suit was one of the first things Nat had made him do the last time he had been on the run. He hadn’t known where it was though. Amy had found and destroyed that tracker. She had come to find them in Siberia. He was sure that she was the one who had helped Sam find them a refuge in Berlin. And now she had disabled Tony’s tracker so no one could find them. Every other thing she had done for him, big and small ran through his head. She loved him. He was an idiot, and she loved him.  
  
Steve stared at the mangled pile of electronics… and blurted out the first fully formed thought that came to him. “I kissed someone.”  
  
Amy resheathed her dagger with a flourish. Her heart falling back into a familiar rhythm. In love with someone else. In love with someone else. “How was it?”  
  
Steve pulled her against him with one hand. “Terrible.” He tipped his head and she responded instinctively, tipping her head the other way. Their mouths fit together perfectly.  
  
Amy cursed herself for giving into the kiss so easily. She wasn’t supposed to be making him fall back in love with her. She was supposed to be getting him to safety and setting him up for a lifetime of happiness with the man he loved. Oh, but it did feel good. She anchored herself against him, warping her fingers around the straps for his shield. She couldn’t resist his soft lips and she knew it. She should never have put herself in this position. Why had she let Dai leave them alone like this?  
  
Steve spread his hand over the small over her back, pressing her into him hard. This was the kiss he had needed. One that said the future would happen with or without them and now would be enough if it was all they had.  
  
When it was over, he pressed his forehead to hers. “I don’t know what I’m doing.”  
  
Her heart broke. She would forgive herself for this kiss. It would be the last one. He needed her to be here for him, taking advantage of his easy physical affection would confuse matters. From here on, they would be too busy for her to slip up anyway. “Don’t worry. I do. For the next little while at least. After that we’ll figure it out.”  
  
“Together?” It was an impossible hope. They couldn’t just pick back up like nothing had happened. He wanted her back though. Back at his side. With her quick wit and quicker strategic mind. With her soft cool hands and reassuring presence.  
  
She slipped her hand out of his, eyes flicking to the tent. There was a reason ‘together’ had been a bad idea before. It was an even worse one now. Especially since she was the second person he had kiss recently. He had to see that too.  
  
Steve followed her train of thought. She knew he loved Bucky. It was an obvious assumption. “It wasn’t him.”  
  
Amy eyes snapped up. “What? Why not?”  
  
“Because, if that happens at all, it has to be his decision. Just like this has to be yours.” Steve took her hand. He wanted this to be her decision. He desperately wanted Amy to choose him. To choose them. He needed her, she had to see that.  
  
Amy freed her hand again, under the pretext of pushing her hair out of her face. “Then who? Sam?” She would break Sam's arm if he had betrayed Brian like that. And Steve’s too for good measure, she didn’t care what he was going through. Some things were sacrosanct. You didn’t just go around kissing someone who was already in a relationship.  
  
Steve rocked back on his heels. He wanted to tell her everything, but he had hoped the conversation would involve less of her pulling away. “Sharon.”  
  
Amy gaped at him. Of all the people. “Sharon? Why would you…” She squeezed her eyes closed in frustration. “I can’t get into this with you. It isn’t my business and right now Bucky needs our help.”  
  
*****  
  
The round tent seemed smaller with Amy in it. Bucky was still laying tightly bundled on the raised bed platform. His breathing had slowed, and the colour was coming back to his face now that he was warm. Steve reclaimed his spot next to Bucky. Amy manoeuvred around him, careful not to touch him as she stepped over the gear strewn on the floor.  
  
Bucky blinked up at them. Something was going on between the two of them, he would figure out what it was later. “Look, Steve found a pretty girl. I thought all he could find was trouble.”  
  
Amy smiled. Teasing Steve, that was promising. “Hey handsome. How are you feeling?”  
  
“I’ve been worse.” Bucky put on his best devilish grin. Whatever was going on with them, the little Fox was attractive, and she was safe. It had been a long time since he had flirted with anyone real.  
  
Steve recognised that look. Bucky never could resist playing up for a pretty girl.  
  
Amy smiled and checked his pulse. “You seem to be coming back from the shock nicely. Did Dai give you anything?”  
  
Bucky let his head tip back. Her cool hands felt nice on his skin. “Morphine and fluids. Not enough morphine to screw me up. Which is nice.”  
  
“He’s good about that. I hate the stuff too.” Amy cupped his chin and tipped his head from side to side. “It looks like you managed to avoid a concussion.”  
  
“Good the last thing I need is more brain damage.” He winked at her, drawing another sweet smile from her. Damn but those eyes were hypnotic, even more violet than he remembered. He wanted to find out what all those little shadows fluttering behind them were.  
  
Amy kept her face serine. He was going to make her laugh at this rate. Bucky was a brilliant flirt. A brilliant flirt. Darkly attractive. Steve’s best friend and then man he was in love with. It was a dangerous combination. At least she had something she could focus on other than those pretty grey eyes. Or the pretty blue ones watching them both from the foot of the bed. “Let’s see if we can do something about that pain, shall we? I’m going to use my power to make you feel better if that’s alright. Same thing I did to get you here.”  
  
Bucky froze. He wasn’t sure how he felt about someone messing with his brain. Even if she could make the pain stop. It had felt great last time. But what if she did something different this time? She had made him feel something other than what he was actually feeling. Could she make him want things he didn’t actually want? “Steve?”  
  
Steve squeezed Bucky’s arm reassuringly. “You can trust her.”  
  
Bucky inspected the woman’s smooth inscrutable face. There were those shadows in her eyes. But nothing conniving. No greed. No glint of victory. “Okay. Do what you gotta do.”  
  
“Here we go.” Amy let her powers flow out through her fingertips. “You should feel calm and centred.”  
  
Bucky felt the tension drain out of his neck and shoulders. Fear and worry melting away. “Better than I have in years.”  
  
“That’s good. Deep slow breaths.” Amy stroked his hair soothingly.  
  
“Your hands are cold.” Bucky mumbled tipping his head into the caress. Forget flirting with a girl, he couldn’t remember the last time someone had pampered him like this. All soft touches and concern for how he was feeling.  
  
“They’re always cold.” Steve whispered taking Bucky’s hand reassuringly. He missed those cool hands after a nightmare.  
  
“Close your eyes.” Amy purred, voice low and smooth. “You’re safe. Everything is going to be alright.”  
  
Steve wished he could lean into her side and soak in some of that comfort for himself. Not even her power. Just the feel of her close to him. He had tried not to let himself miss her the last few months. Now she was back, and he felt her absence like a hole in his heart. Amy hadn’t looked at him since they had entered the tent though. That calm reassuring smile was only for Bucky. He forced himself not to dwell on that. To stay focused on Bucky and how he was doing.  
  
Slowly Bucky’s breathing grew steadier. The rhythm less forced. Steve could see the tension easy out of his features. He looked so much younger when he was asleep. More like the Bucky Steve remembered from before the war. Bucky’s fingers went slack and slipped from his hold. Steve rested his head against the edge of the bed. Bucky was safe. The world was safe. He had burned every bridge he had. But it was worth it. God, he hoped it was worth it.  
  
“He’s asleep.” The soft voice roused Steve from his existential dread. The cool hand on the back of his neck did even more to bring him back to himself. He could feel her pouring a dose of her fire into him as well. Little sparks of calm buzzing across his skin.  
  
Amy lifted Steve’s hand off the blankets turning it so the strip of light from the tent flap fell across his knuckles. The scabs were gritty with embedded debris. He had obviously ignored his own injuries in favour of looking after Bucky. That was Steve, caring for others before himself. “Come outside. I need better light to fix this.”


	12. Fire Side Chat

Nat suppressed a grin as she emerged from customs in Mongolia. Amy’s documents had gotten her here with out any problems. She had gotten a couple hours of sleep on the flight. And if the silver haired woman leaning against the pillar wasn’t here for her then it was a hell of a coincidence.  
  
“Auntie Yuuki.” Natasha called. Her backpack bounced against her back as she bounded across the arrival’s hall.  
  
The white-hair woman straightened up to her full height. Turning gracefully to face Natasha. “Auntie Sakura actually. I do hope I’m not a disappointment.”  
  
Natasha accepted cheek kisses, slightly surprised at the intimacy of the gesture. “Not at all. I am touched that any of Ayame’s honoured Aunts would greet me at the airport.”  
  
“I would like to think you can call us your honoured Aunts as well. You belong with the Fox Clan dear. Never forget that we are your family.” She smoothed a lock of Natasha’s wig. “Black really isn’t your colour, and I suppose you won’t be able to go back to red for a while. I’ll think on it.”  
  
*****  
  
Amy settled Steve on a log bench by the fire. A lantern hanging from a post by his shoulder. She knelt in front of him and reclaimed his injured hand, pulling it into her lap she inspected it carefully. Steve stared at her. She still wasn’t meeting his eyes.  
  
She raised a hand imperiously and Dai came around the fire. He spread the contents of a med kit within easy reach ending by placing a pair of tweezers in her raised hand. Steve noticed the lack of greeting between the cousins. Dai didn’t squeeze Amy’s shoulder on the way by. Amy didn’t tap her fist against his. It was the coldest he had ever seen them be with each other.  
  
Steve watched Dai walk away and close himself into the second tent. “Is he mad at you too or is it just me?”  
  
Amy closed her eyes. He was mad at her too. She understood why, but she needed to do this. She would never forgive herself if something happened to them and she could have helped. “Dai can be overprotective. I’m sorry about the lecture I’m sure he gave you.”  
  
Steve winced as she picked the first piece of shrapnel from his half-healed skin. She was being a gentle as she could, but the metal fragments were deeply embedded, and he had ignored them long enough for the flesh to start to knit together. Another shard joined the first on the cloth next to her.  
  
She had come for him even though he hadn’t called. She had said they would figure it out. She hadn’t told him anything about her motivations for any of it. He let her work in silence for a few more moments before his curiosity overwhelmed him. “Why are you here, Amy?”  
  
She flicked her eyes up at him before returning to her work. “You either know why or you still don’t.” She set the tweezers down and picked up a tube of ointment.  
  
He smiled sadly at her. He did know. She must have burned a huge number of her own bridges to pull this off. Pragmatic as she was there was no chance that she would have done that if she didn’t love him. God, he was an idiot for not seeing it months ago. “You’ve never said it out loud.”  
  
Amy bit off a harsh laugh. “I’m not saying it now.”  
  
She wrapped his knuckles neatly in soft white bandages. Smoothing them between his fingers so they wouldn’t impede his movements. He had such lovely hands. She missed them. The way they encircled her waist. How they felt combing through her hair. They way he lifted her chin so he could stare into her soul. All the cleaver ways he used them to tease or cosset her.  
  
He closed his fingers around hers as she tucked the end of the wrapping under. He kissed her hand softly. The knowledge that she loved him warmed him more than the fire ever could. “Why not?”  
  
Amy closed her eyes and took a deep breath. carefully She pulled away from him. “It will make the next part easier if you don’t know.” She couldn’t have those hands or those kisses back. It was too late. For her plan to work she had to give him up completely. He would have Bucky though. He could be happy. That would be enough for her.  
  
He frowned. She didn’t mean plausible deniability that she had helped him, her saying she loved him wouldn’t change that. It was just the two of them here. No one else would ever known. It had to be something else. “What happens next?”  
  
“You live happily ever after.” She finally looked up at him with a sad smile. He would have Bucky and they would be happy. She wouldn’t cry. There was nothing to cry about, her life had never been the fairy-tale people thought it was. But maybe his could be.  
  
Steve’s frown only deepened at that, how was not knowing that she loved him supposed to help him live happily ever after. That made it sound like she didn’t think she would be part of his life anymore.  
  
“When was the last time you slept?” Amy asked instead of answering his frown. He was thinking too much. He'd probably been thinking too much for the last few days. She smoothed the hair back from his forehead, there was still blood clinging to the roots by his temple. “There is a sleeping bag for you in the tent.”  
  
She stepped away from him rubbing the base of her skull, her headache was getting worse and she didn’t see it going away any time soon. She wished she could let Steve massage some of the tightness out of her neck and shoulders. His touch would be the next best thing to a hot soak. She couldn’t though. He belonged to someone else. He had always belonged to someone else. She needed to remember that, even if no one else seemed to be able to.  
  
Steve followed her back to the tent and let her spread blankets beside Bucky’s bed, while he stripped off his jacket and boots. He stretched out stiffly, it had been a long day. He couldn’t let himself relax just yet though. There was one more pressing question he needed an answer to. “Where are you sleeping?”  
  
Another sad smile greeted his question. “Don’t worry, I’m not going anywhere.” Amy perched herself on a stool by the sleeping man’s head. “I’ll be right here in case he wakes up.”  
  
The silence covered them, blanket like in the dim space. Sleep wasn’t coming. The tent was calm, but it was the calm after a battle, once the fighting had stopped but before the casualties had been counted. Tense and brittle. Steve alternated between watching Bucky’s chest rise and fall and studying Amy’s face as she stared into the flicking lamp on the table. She sat with one knee pulled up to her chest, her cheek resting against it.  
  
Bucky stirred in his sleep, muttering, fist clenching and unclenching. Amy started, but returned to her contemplation of the flame when he settled again. Steve watched as she rubbed at her forehead, recognising the pain and tension in her posture. He couldn’t just leave her there.  
  
“Come here. You need to rest too.” Steve lifted the edge of his blankets.  
  
“I’m fine.” She stayed deliberately still, watching the lamp flame and not him. She wasn’t here to win him back. She was here to protect them. She couldn’t fall back into bed with him in any capacity. No matter how temptingly warm his blankets looked.  
  
“I seem to remember you promising not to lie to me.” That promise coaxed out of an injured Amy seemed like a lifetime ago. So much had happened between then and now. He had no idea if the promise had survived the storm of the last few months.  
  
Amy closed her eyes. There had been a lot of promises. Why did that have to be the one he remembered? “I will be fine, once we get the future settled for the two of you.”  
  
“Amy….” Steve said softly. He sat up in the blankets.  
  
“Go to sleep Steve. Tomorrow…” Amy’s voice caught. Tomorrow she had to find them both a new home. And she would. She would find them somewhere safe. Whatever it took. “Tomorrow we'll work everything out.”


	13. Mornings

Steve woke to soft dawn light. This morning was much calmer than the one before. Bucky was still deeply asleep, breathing slow and regular. Amy was missing though. He had a brief moment to panic before he heard the murmur of voices outside the tent.  
  
“You need to eat.” Dai's voice was soft and low. The beseeching air clear in his tone.  
  
“I’m not hungry.” Amy sounded exhausted. Too tired to either comply or put up more than a token resistance.  
  
“I know. You still need to eat.”  
  
“I’ll just throw it back up.”  
  
“Its just congee. You’ll be able to keep it down. Eat. You need the energy, or you’ll burn yourself out.”  
  
“Dai….”  
  
“Don’t _Dai_ me. You insisted on doing this. You are conducting negotiations later today. How will it look if you faint? You’re no good to either of them if you don’t take care of yourself.”  
  
“How will it look if I throw up?”  
  
Steve pushed aside the blanket that was acting as a door. Amy was sitting by the fire, Dai kneeling in front of her a bowl of white mush held out imploringly. It took Steve a moment to realise what was odd about Amy’s position. She had her side pressed against a post that had held their lantern last night. Hanging above her head was a reddish bag. An IV snaked down to her right elbow. Someone, Dai, it had to be Dai, thought she needed a blood transfusion.  
  
“What’s for breakfast?” Steve asked, carefully avoiding looking at the IV as he approached the fire. He didn’t want Amy to know he had noticed her weakness, she hated being weak. He could pretend not to see if it meant she would feel strong.  
  
Dai continued to glare at Amy. “Rice congee. Do you think your friend can handle solid food? We also have broth. Or I’ve got a nutrient IV in the med kit.”  
  
“Bucky should be fine with some congee. Thanks for cooking.” Steve carefully ladled the rice porridge into two bowls. Amy cradled her own bowl but never lifted the spoon. “Are you not eating?” He asked casually.  
  
Amy grimaced and shoved a spoonful into her mouth. Damn him and his ability to make her feel guilty.  
  
“What’s the plan for the day?” Steve asked stirring a spoonful of jam into his bowl.  
  
Amy shrugged and prodded at her food. “We wait and we rest. We are expecting a few more people before we can make any solid plans.”  
  
Steve wanted to pull Amy into his lap and spoon feed her. Hold her in his arms and make sure she was taking care of herself. Roll back time to before he had messed up. When he’d been allowed to worry about her. Not that he wasn’t worrying about her now. Just that it would be nice if one of the things he was worrying about wasn’t heartbreakingly complicated.  
  
“Something smells good.” The gravelly voice made them both turn around. Bucky leaned heavily against the door frame.  
  
Steve half dropped half set down his bowl and rushed to help keep him upright. “You shouldn’t be up yet.”  
  
“Let him.” Amy used Bucky’s emergence as a distraction and dropped her spoon back into her bowl. Just the smell of the cooked rice was making her stomach roll. “If he is strong enough to get out of bed, he should. The sunlight will be good for him.”  
  
The next several minutes were a flurry of activity. Getting Bucky sitting comfortably next to Amy. Getting bowls of congee for both him and Steve. Steve found a coffee pot in the cooking things and set it to boil. Every time Steve tried to talk to Amy, either to see if she needed anything or to ask why she was here again, Dai stumbled into him. Given that Steve had seen Dai preform the same acrobatics Amy could, he didn’t think it was an accident. He ended up sitting as far away from Amy as was possible at the small fire to avoid the snarling that happened when he tried to sit closer. Which meant he was also far away from Bucky. Far away, but with a perfect view.  
  
Steve was pretty sure this was what going crazy felt like. Dai was watching him like he was trying to settle on the best way to skin him alive. Amy was pointedly not looking at him, stirring her congee to cover the fact she wasn’t eating. Bucky was eating, slowly and methodically lifting the spoon, the bowl balanced on his knees. Bucky leaned over to ask Amy a quiet question between bites. When he did her hair brushed against his cheek, he set down his spoon so he could tuck it out of the way. Steve could hear his pulse in his ears. The reality of the two of them in the same place was very different from anything he had imagined.  
  
“I’m going to… chop some wood.” He had seen a wood pile on the way in last night. It would give him something productive to do. He couldn’t just sit here.  
  
Kissing Amy’s hair when he walked behind her was largely a matter of habit. He didn’t even realise he was doing it until he felt the silky texture under his lips. He followed it up with an awkward pat on the shoulder. He expected a lecture about the slip later. Based on the glare Dai had levelled at him a long one, heavily featuring phrases like ‘leading her on’ and reminders of who broke up with who…. Twice.  
  
He felt more than heard Dai follow him around the tent. Apparently later was now.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky watched Steve walk away. Something was definitely going on between the two of them or maybe it would be closer to say something _had_ been going on between them and had ended awkwardly. “When you said he was a friend I assumed...”  
  
“You know what they say about assuming.” Amy grumbled. Leave it to Steve to pick the worst possible time to slip into casual affection. She sighed and poked despondently at the contents of her bowl. “We dated. That’s over now. He ended it.”  
  
She set the bowl aside, eating was not agreeing with her. Neither was this conversation. There was a duffel bag on the far side of her makeshift IV stand. Maybe she could distract him for the time being. “I have somethings for you.”  
  
She hooked a foot in the bags strap and half kicked half shoved it towards him.  
  
Bucky grinned when he saw what was sitting at the top of the bag. His things from his apartment. His backpack, all his journals, even his gloves. He touched the cover of a journal reverently. He thought they were gone forever when they took his backpack. “You got them.”  
  
“I couldn’t leave them behind. You might forget me.” Amy bumped her shoulder against him. She had flipped through some of them. She hadn’t really been looking when she found the passage about herself. He thought she was brave to stand up to him like she had. After that she had stopped reading. He deserved to have some private thoughts.  
  
“Not a chance.” He rummaged through the bag. She must have ransacked his safe house to get all of this. She had added a few pairs of clean underwear, the books from his bookshelf, his pillow. More than enough to make any place feel like home. Especially if that place had Steve too. His most recent journal was in here. He flipped it open to the picture of Steve. The stern man in the photo wasn’t the same one he had spent the last two days with. Real life Steve was more than he remembered. “He’s terrible at breaking and entering. I could have told you my lock was picked before I got to the landing.”  
  
Amy smiled. She knew Nat had tried, but he still scrapped the faceplate every time. “Is that a skill you think he should work on?”  
  
“I’d prefer if he’d never had to learn it at all, but he’s too stubborn to ever let life be that easy.” There was something large at the bottom of the duffel bag. A cloth warped tube that was large enough to be awkward to extract one handed. He appreciated that she didn’t try to help him. He would need to learn to do things for himself.  
  
He managed to manoeuvre the bundle into his lap and undo the knotted corners. He had to focus to unwrap the cloth without dropping everything. Inside was something shiny and soot streaked. Bucky dropped the arm like it had burned him. Shoving it further away from himself with a foot. “I hate that fucking thing. It hurts, and it’s what made me their weapon. I never want to see it again.”  
  
Amy nodded considering. “We can make that happen. I think we should hold onto it though.”  
  
“Why?” Bucky nudged the bulky at his feet with a toe. It looked less threatening when it was limp like this. He still hated it.  
  
With efficient movements Amy rewrapped the arm and set it back on the far side of the post. “I don’t really want anyone else getting their hands on it for one thing. It might come in handy for another. Adamantium can be very useful.”  
  
Bucky looked at her again. Beauty, brains, and given that she had gone toe to toe with the Winter Soldier twice, more fight than was good for her. No wonder Steve had liked her. Still liked her from his body language. He wondered what had gone wrong between the two of them. What was causing all those complicated emotions she was trying to hide? “You are a pragmatic one, aren’t you?”  
  
Amy turned to say something to that. The words caught in her throat. His face was very close to hers. His eyes were completely different from when she had seen them on the train. Sad, but surprisingly warm. They had more blue in them up close. Fuck these pretty boys and their pretty eyes. She needed to stay focused. He was looking at her lips now. And she was looking at his. Damn, damn, damn. This was bad. This couldn’t happen. She couldn’t do that to Steve.  
  
She blinked hard and fixed a concerned look on her face. She had to stay focused. The boys were assets to be protected. Nothing else. “Are you feeling alright? You look a little flushed.”  
  
She pressed the back of her hand to his forehead. “You’re warmer than I would like. Why don’t you and Steve go lay down for a little while. I might have a surprise for you later.”  
  
A slow smile crept across Bucky’s lips. Now that was interesting. She played it cool, but he recognised the signs of someone who’s defences were shaken. If he wasn’t crazy, a possibility he couldn’t rule out, the pretty girl thought he was pretty right back. “Whatever you say little Fox. I think I’ll like any surprise you can come up with.”  
  
She smiled reassuringly at him as he left to find Steve. As soon as he was out of sight, she brought up what little her stomach contained. Spitting up into the fire to hide the evidence. They were in love with each other. They belonged together. Everything she was doing right now was to ensure they stood a chance at happiness together. No one’s heart was getting broken in all this and that included hers. Which meant she had to be very careful, she knew exactly how fragile her heart was just now.  
  
She managed to straighten up and smile again in time for Steve and Bucky to come back around the tents. They ducked under the tent flap and Amy slumped back against the post holding her IV. Emotional roller-coasters were not her forte. Next time Steve got into trouble she hoped it could be solved with a simple assassination.  
  
She still had the hard part too. Dai didn’t know what her final plan for getting sanctuary for the boys was. He wouldn’t like it when he found out.  
  
As if summoned by her thoughts her cousin returned with an arm full of cut wood. She tried to smile up at him, but Dai had always managed to see through her masks.  
  
He recognised the glassy quality in her eyes instantly. She had thrown up again. That was the third time this morning. “You’re still not eating.”  
  
She rinsed her mouth with the tea and spat that into the fire too. “It isn’t sitting well.”  
  
“Fine. But you are back on solid food tomorrow. I won’t have you slipping into bad habits.” Dai stormed away. He returned a few moments later with a bright yellow IV bag.  
  
Amy sighed as the nutrient rich fluid hit her blood stream. Much easier than trying to eat with her stomach in knots. “I don’t know what I’d do without you Dai.”  
  
“Then maybe take my advice sometime.” He kissed the top of her head. Sweet, brotherly, and much more welcome than Steve’s had been. She closed her eyes and enjoyed the feeling of unconditional love. He was going to be so mad when he figured out her plan.


	14. Reunions

A jeep rattled into camp three hours later. Natasha behind the wheel, wig discarded in her bag, auburn hair fluttering in the breeze. Sakura sitting primly in the passenger seat, hands folded, unruffled by the jostling over rough ground or the wind.  
  
Amy disconnected her IV and went to great them. She hugged Natasha hard. “Good flight?”  
  
“Surprisingly.” Nat kissed Amy on both cheeks and dropped onto a log by the fire. It had been a good flight, but a long day. She was trying not to feel guilty about this reprieve. She would get Clint and Wanda out of the raft as quickly as she could. Getting herself arrested wouldn’t help either of them. “So, what’s the plan?”  
  
“Let me get the boys, I’ll fill you in after reunions.” Amy said gesturing to their tent. Not that she was avoiding sharing the plan. She was pretty sure she was going to be the only person who thought it was a good idea. Her Aunt would be on her side. At least she hoped she would be.  
  
*****  
  
Amy paused as she ducked under the tent flap. Bucky was stretched out on the raised bed again. Steve sitting on the floor by his head, leaning far enough over that his head was half on Bucky’s pillow. Their faces were inches apart, the kind of affectionate atmosphere that only came from a lifetime together covering them like a blanket. A murmured conversation rumbled between them. They looked so perfect. She fixed the image in her mind. It would help her through what she was about to do.  
  
She smiled and kicked Steve’s helmet out of the way. The movement drawing Bucky’s attention. “You’re awake.”  
  
“We are.” Bucky grinned up at her. He patted the bed next to his hip. She’d looked so pretty looking down at him last night, and then during breakfast those violet eyes, so full of emotion when she’d given him his things. He wanted another shot at figuring out what they were hiding. And Steve seemed more relaxed when she was nearby.  
  
Amy rolled her eyes at his flirtatious look, and how bad Steve was at hiding his reaction to that look. He was moments away from kissing Bucky. A good idea in the long run, but maybe not the same week he’d kissed two other people. And not when Bucky had someone else waiting to see him. “Feeling up to seeing someone other than Steve? There is a redhead outside that misses you.”  
  
Bucky’s face lit up. “ _Ryzhiy’s_ here? Is she…”  
  
“She fine. She hardly got in any trouble for helping you.” Amy’s heart fluttered. No wonder Steve wanted was in love with him. The way his eyes sparkled when he smiled was incredible.  
  
Bucky jumped over Steve with more vigour than he had show since before the fight with Tony. Steve moved to follow but Amy waved him back down. “Give them a couple minuets. It will give you a chance to wash the rest of the blood out of your hair.”  
  
There was a brief moment where Steve thought she might help with that. The eye contact between them felt brittle. As if their tenuous connection could break at any moment. Steve swallowed, trying to make his voice work. Somewhere were words that could fix everything. He just couldn’t find them.  
  
Amy muttered something about needing to talk to Dai and slipped back out of the tent. She couldn’t face Steve right now. Not when he looked at her like a lost puppy and her heart begged her to hold him and promise to make everything better. Holding him wouldn’t make anything better and would make many things a great deal more complicated.  
  
Steve huffed and rubbed the back of his neck. He couldn’t blame her for running away this time. Maybe kissing her yesterday had been a mistake. She seemed jumpy this morning.  
  
He thought of her lips on his and the feel of her pressed against him. No. It hadn’t been a mistake. Kissing Ayame was never a mistake.  
  
*****  
  
Natasha was cradling a cup of tea, chatting with Auntie Sakura. Who sat regally across the fire from her, Dai kneeling at her feet playing attendant.  
  
“ _Ryzhiy_!” Bucky almost tripped over his feet to get to her. His little red. She was alive. And she was here, which meant she was safe… Or as safe as any of them were.  
  
“ _Otets_!” Natasha threw her arms around him, sobs escaping her.  
  
“ _Blagosloveniye i zashchita sladkogo rebenka._ I’m sorry. I’m sorry for everything.” Bucky cradled her head against his shoulder. His hand stroking her hair, as if she was still the scared little girl he had met all those years ago. She had survived. Despite everything. Despite him. She had survived. “I’m sorry little red. I never wanted to hurt you. But you did it. You were so strong _Ryzhiy_. You survived.”  
  
“I know _Otets_ ,” Natasha sniffed and tightened her grip. He had been the only one who loved her for so long. And now she had sacrificed other people she loved so he could complete his mission. Her entire world was crumbling, but her rock was back. “You weren’t yourself.”  
  
Sakura blinked at the scene. Her voice was indifferent as she turned to her niece. “Your friend is upsetting our sister, _Kisune no koMukuchi_.” The silver haired woman muttered.  
  
Amy smiled serenely and refilled her aunt’s teacup. “Would you and Daisuki like to hear my plan while they catch up?”  
  
*****  
  
Pink from scrubbing and freshly dressed in the extra clothes Amy had left for him, Steve poked his head out of the tent. Washing up had mostly covered the sound of Natasha crying. A noise that he found viscerally upsetting and hoped never to hear again. Then there had been a lull where everything had seemed fine. Now the voices outside were getting louder. Steve couldn’t make out the words, but the tone was unmistakably angry.  
  
Bucky and Natasha were sitting calmly beside the fire with cups of tea. On the other side of the camp Dai had squared off against Amy and was yelling at the top of his lungs in Japanese. “What did I miss?”  
  
“Little Fox and her cousin are fighting.” Bucky tipped his head to the side listening intently as Amy offered her rebuttal at a lower volume.  
  
Steve blinked several times. Those words didn’t make any sense in that order. “Dai and Amy don’t fight.”  
  
“They aren’t fighting. They are debating.” Natasha said into her cup. They were definitely fighting. Dai was very unhappy with whatever it was Amy had told him. They didn’t want Steve and Bucky to know what it was about though. If they did, they would be having this conversation in English instead of picking a language they could be reasonably confident only she would understand at all and even she wasn’t even fluent. “See Auntie Sakura is refereeing.”  
  
Steve had noticed the silver haired woman raising her fan every few sentences. When she did, whoever was talking would cut their sentence short and started over. It was almost always Amy. Judging just by tone, Dai seemed to be getting away with a lot more. “What are they ‘debating’ about?”  
  
“No idea.” Bucky said sipping his tea. It had a slightly smoky flavor that he’d never tasted before. It was very good.  
  
Steve sat down next to Bucky eyes on the cousins across the fire. Amy could fight her own battles. She wouldn’t appreciate him jumping to her defence. For now, he just had to pretend that life was fine. “Oh, come on, Nat speaks Japanese. She should know.”  
  
Bucky snorted in his tea. He wasn’t worried about violence erupting in the camp. They were passionate, but you didn’t enlist a referee if you weren’t planning on playing by the rules. And _Ryzhiy_ knew these people. She would know if things were about to go sideways. “ _I_ speak Japanese. And if that is what they were arguing _in_ , I would tell you what they were arguing about. That isn’t Japanese. At least not modern Japanese.”  
  
“Imagine trying to understand someone yelling at someone else entirely in Shakespearean. Only worse.” Nat said, handing him a cup of tea in an attempt to distract him at least a little. It didn’t work. Steve was still staring fixedly at Dai’s clenched fists. The aggressive posture must have aroused his protective instincts. Which was ridiculous. Protection had never been what Amy needed.  
  
Bucky tipped his head to the other side. The argument, and it was an argument no matter what _Ryzhiy_ said, was providing an excellent distraction from his tender nerves. “It has to be about command structure. That is the third time someone has said something that sounds like _taii_ , and she definitely said prince earlier.”  
  
“It can’t be. I know them and they wouldn’t argue like this over something like that. Besides Amy definitely said _kekkon_ and marriage doesn’t have anything to do with chain of command.” Natasha was starting to piece together the gist of the argument, she wasn’t fluent in the archaic form of Japanese, but she had picked up a fair amount from Amy and her aunts. From what she had gathered she wondered if she should be trying harder to distract Steve. She was pretty sure he would object just as violently as Dai when he figured it out, for very different reasons.  
  
“What does _Taii_ mean?” Steve asked, a memory tickling the back of his mind.  
  
Bucky answered before Natasha could. “Commander. Like a military commander. The ranks don’t translate directly.”  
  
Natasha winced, the answer saved her from having to lie, but a few more clues like that and Steve would be able to guess the topic under discussion.  
  
“It’s about me. Amy called me that once. Just before Christmas.” Just once. When she had come to rescue him. It had been a slip. The kind of endearment she hadn’t allowed herself. Normally she only dropped into Japanese around him when she was out of her mind with pleasure. He would bet money that if he checked her emergency phone, he would find his emergency phone’s number saved as _Taii_. Fuck, he miscalculated so badly.  
  
Nat froze with her cup halfway to her mouth. He was close. He was too close. How believable would it be if she spilled her tea on him right now? It would distract him at least. It might raise more questions after, but it would buy time.  
  
“Fine!” Dai's rapid switch to English caught them all off guard.  
  
Steve stood quickly as the other man stalked across the camp towards him. Any attempt at conversation was ended before it could begin when Dai shoved him in the chest. “I hope you know what she is giving up for you. Hurt her again and I will hunt you down whether she tries to stop me or not.”  
  
He stormed to the smaller tent where he stopped, holding the door cloth aside expectantly.  
  
Amy followed more slowly. Head down, arms wrapped around herself.  
  
Steve reached for her arm as she got close. Dai was furious. Amy looked deflated. He needed to know what was going on if he was going to help. “What--“  
  
“I have to change. Our guests will be here soon.” Amy pushed past with out stopping. She ducked through the door and Dai closed it behind them. Steve was sure he would have slammed it if he could.  
  
Steve started to move towards the door. He needed to know what was happening. Needed to do whatever he could to make it better. It was his fault. Amy and Dai were two halves of a whole. They never fought. Now they were at each other’s throats and it was all his fault.  
  
The soft pat of a fan touching his shoulder pulled him up short. The firm shake of Auntie Sakura's head dissuaded him from following them.  
  
*****  
  
Amy emerged from the second tent just as a Wakanden jet shimmered into view outside the camp. She was resplendent in deep purple hakama that set off her eyes. The top was patterned with irises. Her fox mask hung next to her swords on her left hip. Steve recognised the outfit as the same one she had worn to the disciplinary hearing after her kidnapping. Had that really been almost two years ago?  
  
He pushed aside the memory. There were more pressing concerns. He caught Amy’s arm as she went by. “Do I get to know what’s going on now? The guy getting off that plane tried to kill Bucky _yesterday_.”  
  
Amy shrugged him off. “I have a plan.”  
  
Steve relented. The Wakandins weren’t acting particularly threatening. He had to trust Amy. She had gotten them this far. He took a seat between Bucky and Auntie Sakura. That put Bucky between him and Nat, the safest place for him if things did go sideways.  
  
Bucky leaned against Steve’s side. He was still soar, the remnants of his arm sent occasional shocks through his nervous system that made it hard to concentrate for very long. “What’s going on?”  
  
“Amy has a plan.” Steve muttered shifting protectively. He trusted Amy. He did. If she thought this was a good idea, he was sure it was. He just would have liked more information going into it. That was all.  
  
Bucky nodded slowly, eyes scanning the area for threats. “Good. The little Fox is wicked smart.” An amused smile touched the corners of Skaura’s mouth. She flicked her fan open and rolled it around her hand. “I’m glad you approve. Considering you are the only person to come close to besting her in the field.”  
  
Nat flicked her eyes to the side. Now that was interesting. Sakura was remarkably unconcerned that the Winter Soldier had just used the same pet name for Amy that she and the other Aunts did. Nat would have expected an imperious comment about respecting Amy’s status or proper address. Instead it was more like she was encouraging the familiarity. For that matter, Sakura didn’t seem to have a problem with Steve either. Dai was one wrong look from murdering Steve. But Sakura had taken his return to their lives with grace and ease. Had Amy opted not to tell her Aunts about the breakup? Or was it something else?  
  
Bucky cleared his throat. His run in with the little Fox in Prague. That was on his list. If he closed his eyes, he could picture her tumbling over the edge of a roof, blood staining the left side of her body. “I should probably apologise for that.”  
  
Sakura reached across Steve to pat Bucky’s knee. “My niece holds no grudge. Young people make mistakes. She learned her lesson.”  
  
Steve did a double take as he caught up with what they were saying. “You’re the one that shot Amy when she was sixteen?”  
  
Bucky started and swivelled to face Steve. “She was sixteen?” That couldn’t be right. Had she really been a child? It had been a fairly close fight. If she had stood her ground and really tried to kill him, she probably could have. Steve had to be wrong, she had to have been at least twenty. What year had that been, maybe he could work backwards...  
  
Nat shushed them. The Wakandin delegation was close enough to hear them now. “We are starting.”  
  
Amy stood confidently between her party and the approaching Wakandins. She had negotiated trade treaties before. This was just another step. There was no doubt in her mind that she could pull this off. There couldn’t be. Doubt was death to unstable negotiating positions. She felt Dai standing at her shoulder. He might not entirely approve, but he would still back her through anything. That unconditional love reassured Amy.  
  
T’Challa met her at the head of his delegation. His UN ambassador and Dora Milaje at his back. There were pleasantries and formal exchanges to open discussions. Both parties wanted this to work out, no one here was playing to win. There was a mutually beneficial solution here, they just had to find it.  
  
Steve watched Amy intently. The way she exaggerated her hand movements, the angle she held her head at. He had seen this Amy before. This was the Amy that came out at parties. The one he had seen in Paris. Work Amy. Vixen. The goddess.  
  
T’Challa brought them to the main issue at hand. “You want us to offer sanctuary to the Captain America and the Winter Soldier.”  
  
“And the rest of his team, yes.” Amy said confidently.  
  
“Taking them in would be quite a risky proposition. What is in it for us?” T’Challa knew what he wanted. The only question was whether it was something she could offer or not.  
  
Amy pulled herself up to her full regal height. Her most impassive political mask firmly fixed on her features. “I am authorised to negotiate on behalf of the Imperial House of Nippon, and her government. I can offer anything up to and including marriage to the highest-ranking imperial princess of an appropriate age.”  
  
T’Challa’s eyebrow rose slightly. That answered his question. If anything, he was aiming too low. The ambassador stepped forward. “The Emperor doesn’t have a daughter.”  
  
The corner of Amy’s mouth twitched. It looked like they were going to take the bait. “No, but he has a favourite niece by his half sister. A niece who is also the future empress' best friend. One who was recently formally legitimised.”  
  
Steve’s hand spasmed, cracking the cup he was holding. Highest ranking imperial princess. The Emperor’s favourite niece. The future Empress’s best friend. Legitimised. Ayame.  
  
This is what Amy and Dai had been arguing about. Not something he had done. But whether she would offer herself up as a bargaining chip. Whether she would sacrifice herself to protect him. His Amy was going to marry someone else.  
  
A tap on his knee interrupted his panic. Sakura’s fan was back. Another tiny shake of her head convinced him not to charge into the negotiations and stop Amy. Wordlessly she swapped his teacup for a fresh one. Steve thought he detected the smallest hint of disapproval around her eyes. Although whether it was directed at him for not remembering his place or at Amy for her decision he couldn’t tell.  
  
“I see. Anything up to and including marriage.” T'Challa exchanged a look with the rest of his group. They needed to reevaluate the extent of their plan. “Let us confer for a moment.”  
  
“Of course.” Amy smiled there were some more gentile pleasantries before they retreated to their plane. Dai walked most of the way with them, answering questions from the ambassador in a low voice. He would stand by to tell them anything they needed to know.  
  
Opening salvos had gone well. They were on track for a mutually beneficial agreement. She sighed and walked towards the smaller tent. Her stomach had finally calmed down and she needed to eat something. Preferably eat something and spend a little time alone to re-centre herself.  
  
Steve ignored Dai’s silent glares and hurried to stop Amy before she could disappear. He grabbed her arm and pulled her in so the others wouldn’t overhear. “You can’t.”  
  
Amy set her jaw. Dai hadn’t been able to change her mind and Steve wouldn’t either. This was the best plan. “I can and I did.”  
  
“There has to be another way. We can figure something out. I'm not worth it.” Steve was panicking. On some level that wasn’t fair. He wasn’t anything to Amy anymore. He had to be _something_ to her, otherwise she wouldn’t be doing this for him. But as long as he was something to her he couldn’t let her do this for him.  
  
“Is he? Are they?” Amy hissed nodding at Bucky who had his head together with Nat. That wasn’t even all of them. Wanda, Sam, Clint. She wasn’t doing this just for Steve.  
  
“We can figure something out.” Steve pleaded, rubbing her arm. She couldn’t marry someone else, not when he had just figured out that she loved him.  
  
“Don’t be an idiot. Being able to do this sort of thing is half the reason I couldn’t....” The memory of that disastrous night was too painful. Amy locked both the memory and her emotions down. Neither of them needed to think about that. The proposal hadn’t been the problem. She had been the problem. “This is my decision not yours. And I’m not doing it just for you. I pull this off and we have somewhere safe to hide Bucky, and Wanda, and Sam, and Natasha, and any of the other people your dragged into this mess. Or did you forget about them?”  
  
“I can’t ask you to…” Steve let his hand fall. Amy was slipping through his fingers. And he couldn’t even argue with her point.  
  
“You didn’t ask. I offered.” Amy pulled out of his grasp. He wasn’t going to let this go with out at least some reassurance she wasn’t throwing her life away. “T'Challa’s nice. His ex-girlfriend is a friend and I know they are still close. We can come to an understanding. This is my decision.”  
  
What did that even mean? Not that _he_ would be a part of the understanding, her tone made it sound more like she expected to be alone even while she was married. Maybe go back to the kind of recreational sex she had enjoyed before him. Steve looked down at the space between their hands. Inches and miles. Everything was falling apart this month. “Amy I….”  
  
Amy stepped further away. She didn’t want to hear whatever he was about to say. She wanted to eat something and hide long enough to regain her composure. “Bucky is looking for you.”  
  
Steve glanced back over his shoulder. Bucky was defiantly looking at them and looking worried. He mouthed a quick reassurance at Bucky, desperately hoping that Nat would distract him long enough for him to finish this conversation with Amy. Nat was apparently not feeling benevolent. She was watching curiously right along side Bucky. Steve hated when his life transformed into a stage show. He glared at Nat, willing her to figure out what needed to happen.  
  
She shrugged and whispered something that made Bucky turn towards her.  
  
Steve sighed. Just a few minuets, that was all he needed to make Amy see reason. How dangerous could Katsura be really? It was a royal residence in a sovereign country, no one was going to be going around kicking down doors. Or they could go on the run. With Amy with them they, he was sure they could avoid capture indefinitely. Or he could even turn himself in. Anything but this. He braced himself and turned back to Amy. There had to be a way to talk some sense into her.  
  
She was gone.


	15. Solutions

Amy leaned against the tent’s main support post. Negotiations with Wakanda she could handle. A sad eyed Steve who didn’t know what he wanted was another question. He had always been so confident. From wanting her back, to wanting her to stay, to wanting her to leave. She had no idea what to do if he didn’t know what he wanted. Doubly so when he clearly didn’t understand what she was doing and why.  
  
She pushed herself away from the post. She could worry about Steve’s emotions after she made sure he wasn’t going to be arrested. Compartmentalise and prioritise. That was the name of the game today. Priority number one right now, eat a meal replacement bar and drink a bottle of water. Priority number two, complete negotiations without showing too much of her hand.  
  
*****  
  
Negotiations resumed less than an hour later. Dai pulled Amy out of the tent and filled her in on what he had overheard. Amy listened intently. Dai’s eavesdropping hadn’t been particularly useful, he didn’t speak isiXhosa, let alone Wakandin. He had picked up a few tidbits that made Amy make a few quick recalculations on what she should expect from the rest of the conversation. She did her best to ignore Steve’s pleading eyes. She wasn’t about to let emotion overwhelm logic. She was in the right damn it.  
  
T’challa smiled warmly at his negotiation partner. The overture was finished. It was time to start the main body of their little dance. He hoped she would be caught pleasantly off guard by what he had to say. “We do not want a royal marriage. We want an official embassy and a trade agreement.”  
  
“I believe we can arrange that.” Amy said, a knot of tension easing in her stomach. Trade negotiations were firmly in her comfort zone. She really could do this. She might even be able to do it without breaking Steve’s heart.  
  
Steve zoned out during the rest of the negotiations. A combination of relief and overwhelming dread coursing through his veins. The good news was Amy was going to be the Japanese ambassador to Wakanda. They would have a suite of rooms in the palace, whatever that meant. His entire team of outlaws would be able to stay together. There was even some talk of medical advancements not available in the outside world. Steve didn’t dwell on that too much. Wakanda was a small isolated country how different would their technology be really.  
  
The bad news was Amy still wasn’t looking at him. And she kept making subtle comments implying her ambassadorship being a temporary measure, like she expected to bow out and leave them with a career diplomat at some point.  
  
The negotiations had gone better than he could have hoped. Wakanda was going to get everything T’Challa wanted for his country and more. At least theoretically. T’challa felt he had to hedge the promises he had made so far. “This is all contingent on my coronation. There are some formalities I need to complete before I can make any long-term promises.”  
  
Amy refused to let the relief she felt. This was going to work, and it was going to be less painful than she had expected. One more loose end and they could get one with it. “Can you house the Winter Soldier in the interim? We need to collect the rest of our party, but it would be easier knowing he was safely contained.”  
  
T'Challa nodded and turned to Bucky. “What does safely contained look like to you?”  
  
*****  
  
Nat paced restlessly along the edge of the landing strip. The view was stunning. Rolling fields on one side, valley filled with misty rain forest on the other. She couldn’t enjoy it at all. Her brain was back in mission mode. She wanted to be moving. Not waiting around for someone to freeze her _Otets_.  
  
Clint, Wanda, Sam, … that other guy that had been fighting with Steve, all of them were in serious trouble. The Raft prison was no joke. She had consulted on the security. She and Steve were going to have their work cut out for them, even with Amy to man the jet and stand watch.  
  
Behind her she could hear the rhythmic rasp of Amy sharpening her knives. Natasha didn’t need to turn around to know the exact position she had assumed, sitting on her heels, toes tucked under, blade braced against her right knee, smooth worn whetstone in her left hand. She was probably running through mission phases in her mind the same way Nat was.  
  
Natasha took a deep breath to re-center herself. T’Challa turning in Zemo should have given them some breathing room. They had a plan. They had a back up plan. They had layers of safety nets in case anything went wrong.  
  
The sound of metal on stone stilled. Nat snapped around to see why.  
  
Steve was back. Hands shoved into his pockets. Shoulders slumped.  
  
“All done?” Amy asked sheathing her knife.  
  
“He’s under.” Steve knew how exhausted he sounded. He couldn’t be bothered to hide it. The girls wouldn’t judge him. Bucky had spent years in and out of cryo. Freezing him again didn’t feel right. It had been Bucky’s plan. He just had to keep reminding himself of that fact.  
  
Natasha squeezed his shoulder. She didn’t like it either her. But her _Otets_ wasn’t stable right now. He needed to be kept safe, both from hurting others and from being hurt himself. “We’ll figure out a better plan when we get back.”  
  
Amy rocked to her feet. “Let’s get moving so we can get back.”  
  
*****  
  
The combination of intelligence pulled from the minds of Amy and Natasha, and a plan developed by Steve got them into the Raft with minimal complications. They arrived in the middle of shift change for the guards. Between Natasha’s widow bites, some well placed rabbit punches and a few choke-holds, they managed to knock out or restrain almost all the guards. The signal jammer borrowed from Amy’s gear stopped any outgoing calls for help. Nat handled the control panel outside the containment room while Steve broke into the armoury and liberated everyone’s gear.  
  
Steve jogged back to Nat just as she got the main door open. Nat flicked her eyes up to him. “The individual cells are being difficult.”  
  
“Is that necessary?” Steve asked. Different situations called for different tools. There was a time for subtlety and a time for bruit force. They might just have moved from one to the other.  
Natasha looked up at him sceptically. What was the alternative? They either got them open or they didn’t get everyone else. “They were designed by the same team that made the Winter Soldier’s transport.”  
  
“I don’t recall that giving Bucky to much trouble.” A tiny smirk twitched at the corner of Steve’s mouth. That answered his question. His way would set off alarms, but they had secured the building, so that didn’t matter anymore.  
  
Nat pursed her lips considering. One the one hand, he had used his metal fist. On the other, Steve was stronger than her _Otets_ and he would be coming at them from the side they were supposed to open from. “Point taken. After you.”  
  
*****  
  
Steve did a quick scan of the room. The main area was dark, the prison was running off emergency power. The cells were still brightly lit. Four empty, four occupied by the people they were looking for. He stepped further into the room, sensing Nat in the shadows behind him. Sam grinned knowingly out at him. Clint looked amused. Scott looked amazed. Wanda looked…  
  
Wanda looked like she had been beaten and drugged.  
  
“Wanda!” Steve lunged for her cell first. She was a child, and they had tied her up like some kind of animal. She hadn’t even reacted to Steve and Nat’s entrance. Her eyes didn’t seem to be focusing. Definitely drugged, probably in shock. Tony and Vision couldn’t know that they had done this to her. They would never stand for this.  
  
The hinges of her cell snapped readily in his hands and he hauled the door open the wrong way, half tossing the glass and steel frame across the room. “Don’t worry baby girl. We’re going to get you somewhere safe.”  
  
Nat held out her arms and Steve poured Wanda into them. She flicked a knife into her left hand and set to work on the straps holding Wanda’s arms.  
  
Steve turned his attention to the other occupied cells. “The rest of you have an option. You can come with us now. Or you can stay here. We have lawyers coming for you in the morning. They will be able to help but I don’t think they can get you off entirely.”  
  
Clint spoke first. It was obvious that he had been thinking about this even before Steve and Nat had walked in. “I’m staying here.”  
  
Nat had known that would be his answer. It still broke his heart a little. She sat Wanda on the steps to her cell and crossed to Clint. “I’m so sorry.”  
  
Clint smiled. He wished he could hug her goodbye. His case would be better if there was no attempt to break him out. “Still love you Nat, but my family needs me.”  
  
Nat met his eyes. She understood. “Your lawyer will be here in the morning. Amy says she thinks she can plead you down to house arrest. And don’t worry about money. The Cayman account is clean, and all yours. Your lawyer can get you access to that too. Tell them I love them?”  
  
“I will.” Clint rested his head against the door until Nat mirrored his pose. Palms and foreheads pressed together, separated the glass and bars, but still connected. “Be safe.”  
  
“Always.” Nat wasn’t going to cry. He was her best and oldest friend. This wasn’t goodbye. They would see each other again someday.  
  
Steve turned away so they could have their moment. There were two more answers he needed. “Scott staying or going?”  
  
Scott hesitated. “I don’t regret backing you Cap. But I have a daughter…”  
  
“Family first. The lawyer will be expecting you too.” Steve said smiling reassuringly. That was an expected answer too. “Sam?”  
  
“I’m with you. Always.”


	16. Nice is Just a Place in France

Nat sunk into the co-pilots seat next to Amy. They were out. Sam and Wanda were stable. They just had to make it back to Wakanda and everything would be fine. Amy turned over control and Nat punched them into subsonic flight.  
  
Getting back to Wakanda would require a circuitous route. No one wanted them to attract attention to the small country that was offering them sanctuary. They would have to ditch this Quinn Jet once they got over land. Nat had a hanger in the south of France where they could stash it. She also had four other jets squirrelled away around the world. Old habits were hard to break. Something she was grateful for at this moment since it meant with a little leg work, they would be operating with at least some resources.  
  
Amy leaned her chair back. She was glad they were moving again. Waiting in the jet had not been relaxing. She hated being out of the action. It had left her keyed up with no outlet for her energies. At least when they finally made it to land and went to ground, she could sneak away and squeeze in a run.  
  
Steve watched Amy trying to stretch. He had been looking for an excuse to touch her. This was his chance. He perched himself on the bulkhead next to her chair. Reaching out and massaging the back of her neck. He rubbed his thumb in a circle at the base of her skull. He had done this enough times to know where the knots formed in her muscles.  
  
Amy closed her eyes and let out a long slow breath. It felt so good, so familiar. It was wrong to still feel that way about it. He needed to be free for Bucky. That didn’t stop her from wanting to purr and melt into him.  
  
Steve kept massaging until Amy opened her eyes and looked up at him. He cupped her chin, thumb resting on her lower lip. She had come back. Her ambassadorship couldn’t be a temporary solution. He had her now and he didn’t want to lose her. “You’ll stay? To help figure out a way to help Buck?”  
  
“I will.” Amy smiled up at him until he nodded and went to check on Wanda again. There really wasn’t anything else to say.  
  
Nat stared after him in shock. “He can’t know what he’s asking.”  
  
“He knows.” Amy whispered closing her eyes again. He had figured it out. Not saying the words out loud was a thin buffer at best. Still. She would stay. She would spend the entire time on eggshells. But she would stay.  
  
“And you’re just fine with this?” Nat asked banking towards the coast.  
  
“He needs me.” Amy looked at her hands. Curling and uncurling her fingers. It wasn’t just Steve. There was someone else. Bucky. He had survived. His survival had driven her through some of the worst times. He deserved her protection. “They both do.”  
  
Nat sighed and check the instrumentation to make sure they were still avoiding detection. “It is a good thing I love you and Barnes, or I would make him bleed over this.”  
  
Amy glared ineffectually at her. Now Nat was falling into the same harsh attitude as Dai. Steve didn’t deserve that. It wasn’t his fault that things hadn’t worked out between them. “You love him too.”  
  
“Like a brother.” Nat replied crisply. “That doesn’t mean I can’t make him bleed.”  
  
*****  
  
The dingy hotel room was tight fit for all five of them, crammed into the small room with two double beds and a sad armchair. Steve paced restlessly, wearing a trench in the threadbare carpet. Sam sat very still in the armchair, taking deep slow breaths. Wanda was curled on the bed farthest from the door with her head in Natasha’s lap. Natasha gently stroked her hair, softly humming a Russian lullaby. Amy perched on the narrow windowsill. Her knees drawn up to her chest, studiously avoiding looking directly at Steve.  
  
Steve wished she would look at him. There was too much going on in his head. He needed someone to help him sort everything out. Most pressing was the thought he hadn’t been able to shake since he had hit the water in the Atlantic. “Tony needs a way to get a hold of us. If anything big happens, they’ll need all hands on deck and we’ll need to know about it.”  
  
Natasha’s hand stilled on Wanda’s hair. There was a solution to this problem. She and Amy exchanged a look. “Mine should still be clean.”  
  
Amy bit her lip. A clean break would have been better. Even the best security had flaws. Steve wasn’t wrong though. When things inevitably hit the fan again, they couldn’t wait around for public information. “Mine definitely is.”  
  
As one they both pulled flip phones out of their belts, twins to the one Dai had taken from him and destroyed in Mongolia. Nat started wiping all data off the one she held and reprogramming a single number. Amy was less fastidious leaving two numbers in her phone but changing the names on both.  
  
“This one is for Tony.” Nat passed him her phone.  
  
“This one is for you.” Amy tossed her phone the few feet to him. No risk of their hands touching that way.  
  
Steve flipped them both open. The one for Tony showed the single contact saved in the speed dial on the first screen. _Steve Rogers_. The one Amy had said was his showed two. _Tony Stark. Natasha Romanoff_. If Natasha had a back up emergency phone, then Amy almost certainly did. Her absence in his contacts was a deliberate choice. There was the possibility that Natasha’s number actually belonged to Amy’s secondary phone and that Amy didn’t have a new emergency number to program in right now. But the absence was still notable.  
  
He slipped his new phone into his pocket. He turned the second phone over in his hands. It wasn’t enough. Not after what had happened. “I need to write him a note. To apologise.”  
  
Amy pulled a pad of paper out of her gear bag and ripped off a sheet. “Untraceable. You can walk it over to Fedex when you’re done. I’m going to get some air.”  
  
Steve watched her slip out the window and disappear. Not ideal. But she had agreed to stay, that was a start. This letter was a start too. He needed to explain himself at least a little. To let Tony know that they weren’t enemies. That they might be on different sides of this, but he still cared and would be there if Tony needed him.  
  
*****  
  
Amy pulled a leg in against her chest, resting her cheek on her knee. Below her the city glittered. Windows glowing warmly. Little points of light that could only be car headlights, weaving around the steep hills. The waterfront blazing nearly as bright as day. Boats bobbing in the bay, painting the tops of the waves a soft gold. The salty breeze tugged a lock of Amy’s hair out of its bun, whipping it against her cheek. She tapped her phone against her ankle. She should head back to the hotel. Try and get some rest if not actual sleep. She wasn’t ready. There had been a time, not that long ago, when she would have been pleased to spend the night in a French hotel with Steve, even under less than ideal circumstances. Back then she would have spent the night dozing against his chest. The stress of everything that had gone wrong the last few days would melt away in the safety of his arms. In the morning her mind would be clear and the two of them would be able to come up with a brilliant solution.  
  
Natasha boosted herself onto the rooftop. Amy’s obsession with heights was getting out of hand. She had found the one building with an unobstructed five story drop within sight of their hotel. Getting to the roof without being spotted from any of the surrounding windows had been an absolute nightmare. Which was probably also a reason Amy had chosen it. She loved a challenge almost as much as a perilous drop. “Any chatter?”  
  
“Looks like you’re clear so far. They think you headed for Greenland.” Amy answered without looking up. She’d been listening to chatter and trying to distract herself from herself from everything else that was happening. Most of the main agencies had them tracking North-northwest, although Israel had them headed for Cuba, and North Korea was already claiming they had defected there. The Korean’s had even broken out some old footage of the Winter Soldier visiting Ryongsong Residence to prove it. They had forgotten to doctor the footage to change the size of the trees that lined the driveway to match anything from the last decade. He didn’t have the mask anymore either. Some days Amy wondered how North Korea managed to be any kind of threat.  
  
Natasha settled on the edge of the roof next to Amy. She’d given Amy an hour to get her head straight before she’d followed. Aims wouldn’t have ‘gone to get some air’ if she wasn’t having issues processing what she had gotten herself into. “You want to talk about it?”  
  
Amy raised an eyebrow. ‘Talking about it’ wasn’t exactly something she was known for. “ _It_ being the difficulties Wanda is going to face with her upcoming detox?”  
  
Nat leaned back to look at what few stars were visible here. She wondered if her _Otets_ remembered any of the stargazing they had done when she was a child. Pretty much all the constellations she could spot were one he had taught her. It was a minor detail in the grand scheme of things, and certainly not the reason Amy was avoiding their hotel, but she was curious. “I was actually thinking the fact you agreed to live with Steve and my _Otets_. Also known as your ex and the not entirely stable man he loves.”  
  
Right, the thing she was trying to forget. Forgetting wasn’t going well, and the more she thought about it, the more she started to see Dai’s point. This was a terrible idea. Steve had been able to get inside her emotional defences from the start. Living with him, watching him with Bucky. There was no way she wasn’t going to break her heart if she did this. Amy focused on the lights on the water. “You know, I’ve never yachted around the Mediterranean. People tell me it’s gorgeous, but I never had the time.”  
  
“He’ll understand.” Natasha said softly. He wouldn’t like it, but Steve would let Amy go if she couldn’t handle staying. “If you need to back out. Steve will understand.”  
  
“No. I made a commitment.” Amy's voice was calm and level. She had promised Steve she would stay until Bucky was better. Not that she knew what 'better' looked like. Chryo stabilised him, and he had managed on his own for the better part of two years. How much help could she be really? Enough. Even if her being there was only a placebo to reassure Steve, she would stay. She couldn't just leave, not when he needed her.  
  
A sailboat drifted gracefully towards the entrance of the harbour. There was a whole world out there that wasn’t Steve and his messes. So how did she keep getting drawn in?  
  
Natasha wrapped her arms around Amy, setting her head on Amy’s shoulder. Her friend was ridiculously stubborn. Nat was still glad she would have her friend with her while they figured out what their life on the run looked like. “So, how are we going to deal with Wanda’s detox?”  



	17. Wake Up Call

“We have the entire floor to ourselves.” Natasha explained as she helped Wanda down the ramp of the jet. Steve followed them hovering  
  
“Amy’s going to get some stuff sent to us, we should be able to set up something reasonably close to…” Nat trailed off. Something had gone very wrong while they were away. Scorch marks from energy blasts scared the pad the hover planes took off and landed from. Swathes of dirt and grass were torn up in the field beyond. Most concerningly Shuri and Nakia were waiting anxiously on the landing pad.  
  
“He woke up.” Shuri blurted as soon as their feet touched the pavement.  
  
Amy froze, the belt of her jacket half untied. “What do you mean he woke up?”  
  
“I mean the Winter Soldier is awake and in my lab.” Shuri was vibrating with anxiety.  
  
Nat and Amy exchanged picnicked looks. The odds of Bucky being awake and everything being fine were very low. They broke into a run at the same time.  
  
“Sam, look after Wanda.” Steve called over his shoulder as he rushed after them.  
  
*****  
  
A crowd of Dora Milaje circled Bucky, clearly reluctant to approach. An injured pair pulled out of the way on one side showed why.  
  
Steve was surprised to see Amy stripping off layers. Shedding all her gear. Arm guards, sword belt, gi jacket. Skin. He realised as her under shirt hit the floor leaving her in just her sports bra. Her power worked best through skin contact. She was sacrificing protection for the hope of being able to override his programming. His heart clenched. Amy was about to put herself in danger to help Bucky. Bucky needed all the help she could give him. And Steve had no idea how to help either of them.  
  
Nat darted in, yelling something in Russian. The word was lost in the buzzing that drowning out everything as far as Steve could tell. Bucky swung a powerful punch at Natasha. Steve yelped in panic, if he hurt her, really hurt her….  
  
Nat managed to dance out of the way, just as Amy moved on his other side. Natasha had been a distraction. The part of his mind still free from panic wondered when the women had found time to work out a plan or if they were just that in sync.  
  
Amy tackled Bucky. Sparks gushed out if her. Pouring into him everywhere they touched. Bucky’s movements slowed and he slumped to his knees. Amy curled herself tighter as he started to relax. Forcing more and more of the catatonic calm she was focused on into his mind. He struggled a little more, clawing impotently at the arm around his throat before he collapsed unconscious in a heap with Amy still wrapped around his head and neck.  
  
The sudden silence in the room was deafening. Natasha was very aware that the three of them were still surrounded by Dora Milaje with levelled spears. She pushed he hair back from her face. There was a lot of lingering tension in the room. And a lot of new problems. “So, freezing won’t work.”  
  
“I'll manage him until we come up with a better solution.” Amy rolled free of Bucky giving herself a moment to catch her breath before she rocked to her feet. “Steve take Bucky to the embassy.”  
  
“What about you? Are you alright?” Steve asked as he scooped Bucky up. She didn’t look entirely alright. She looked like a stiff breeze might knock her over. He could carry her too if she would let him. Or she could at least walk in front of him so he could catch her if anything did go wrong.  
  
“Before he wakes up, please Steven.” Amy snapped. The last thing they needed was Bucky coming to in chaotic hostile surroundings. Amy didn’t think she would be able to bring him down a second time today. She wasn’t sure she would be able to do a lot of things today.  
  
Steve looked between the unconscious Bucky and Amy’s steely glare. He nodded sharply. She was right. Deal with one problem at a time. Trust the girls to be able to take care of themselves and one another. If Amy needed anything Nat would be able to help her. He hefted Bucky a little higher in his arms and started for the elevator.  
  
Amy was trying to ignore the way her world was tunnelling and the way everything sounded like it was under water. If she just ignored it, it would go away. “Nat, would you be a dear and find me a chair?”  
  
Natasha took a serious look at Amy. All the colour had drained from her face. Her knees where locked to keep her upright. A tremor had started in her right hand. “You’re about to pass out, aren’t you?”  
  
Amy blinked slowly. Breath through it. She just had to breath through it. She pushed back at the blackness encroaching on her vision. “It would seem so.”  
  
*****  
  
She came to with Nat bracing her neck. Amy struggled into a sitting position on her own. She hurt all over, but she had functioned through worse. “Seizure or did I just pass out?”  
  
“Passed out for about five minuets.” Natasha said checking her pulse. “Was seizure an option?”  
  
“Always hard to say, I try not to drain myself like that. The blood loss complicated regulating. It will be a few days before my body stops hating me.” Amy accepted a glass of brightly coloured liquid from Shuri. A sip told her that it was an electrolyte drink of some kind, it tasted like fake raspberries and salt. She hoped there was more where this had come from. She needed to hydrate. “You can’t tell him.”  
  
Natasha glared down at her. She was getting very tired of hearing those words from Amy. At some point she was going to have to tell Steve something. “How exactly do you intend to explain why we didn’t follow them right away?”  
  
“Simple,” Amy took three long slow breaths to help settle her stomach. “We needed to ask Shuri about why he woke up. And what happened to the lab. Why is the window broken?”  
  
Shuri shifted awkwardly. “We had an incident while you were away.”  
  
“An incident?” Nat latched onto those words. In her experience ‘incidents’ were complicated things that spilled over onto anything they touched. She had seen ‘incidents’ topple nations. Hell, what had happened at the airport had been an ‘incident’.  
  
“An attempted coup, by my cousin, only we didn’t even know we had a cousin until he showed up with Claw, you know, the weapons dealer? … it’s a long story.”  
  
“Give us the highlights.” Amy sipped her drink slowly. It was hard to stop herself from gulping down the whole thing in one go just to get it over with. If she did that with her stomach in the condition it was, she would only make herself sicker. “What does that have to do with Barnes waking up?”  
  
“My lab was breached. Hence the window. He was fine during that. But when my systems reset afterwards, they also rebooted his chryo chamber. Something about the thawing and refreezing process woke him up and set him off.”  
  
“That makes sense.” Amy tried to stand, her knees buckled under her and she sat back down hard. “Fuck. I don’t have time for this. I need to go to them.”  
  
Nat pulled Amy’s arm over her shoulder so she could help her back to their rooms. “You need to clean up and get some rest. I will look after everyone tonight.”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky had fallen asleep as soon as Steve had gotten him into what currently passed as a bed in the embassy. He had curled into a tight ball, clinging desperately to a pillow. Steve needed to thank Sam for getting things roughly set up for them. Finding the bedding and food that they had brought with them from Mongolia. There was soup going in the kitchen. Gear, sleeping bags, and pillows had been distributed between the bedrooms.  
  
What he needed now was to talk to Amy. She had been looking peaky since Mongolia. When he had left her in the lab, she had been paper-white and looked ready to fall over. He was never going to be able to sleep if he didn’t make sure she was alright. She wasn’t in any of the bedrooms or the kitchen. But Nat was back so she had to be here. “Where is she?”  
  
“She’s in the shower.” Nat rubbed her neck and waved him off. It had been a long day and they should all be resting. Amy especially, Nat knew that she hadn’t really slept since before the explosion. It was no wonder she had passed out. Nat was considering passing out herself. What they all needed was a little space to get themselves together. “Steve….”  
  
Steve was already gone before she finished her sentence. He needed to see Amy. He needed to know that she was alright. She had been favouring her left side since France, maybe even before that more subtly. She’d been largely silent during the flight over Africa. Teeth gritted and arms held close to her body. And the bruises, they hadn’t been a priority when Bucky was in crisis. Now that Bucky was asleep Steve couldn’t get the purple and green modelling out of his head. That kind of bruises didn’t show up out of nowhere. What if she was seriously hurt? What if it was his fault she was seriously hurt?  
  
*****  
  
Amy leaned her head against the wall of the shower, letting an icy stream pour over her back. The cold water soothed her poor abused body. It helped. The chill chased some of the fog from her mind. Sharpening her senses. She was still a long way from her best, but she was more herself than she had been. A good night’s sleep and some more hydration, and she would probably be able to function at about 80% in the morning. And Amy was fully aware that her 80% was better than most peoples 110%. She shifted so a sheet of water washed over her shoulder and chilled the inflamed area around the cut under her shoulder blade. She had too much discipline to miss her bed when she was still technically working. But she wished she had a proper mattress and enough pillows to cradle her and stop her from rolling onto the cut tonight.  
  
Distracted by the ragged gash that greeted him, it took Steve a moment to realise what was off about the shower. There was no steam. “Does cold water actually help with the healing or are you punishing yourself for something?”  
  
“Fuck.” Amy jumped. Twisting in the air to face the threat. she stumbled on the slick floor and banged her shoulder against the wall. “Fuck.”  
  
Steve bounded across the room and grabbed her arm to stabilise her. “I didn’t mean to startle you.”  
  
Amy twisted out of his grip. Her head was throbbing almost as badly as her shoulder. That was the only reason he had managed to get a jump on her. She had been hoping to avoid him until after she had passed out for several hours and her mind was clear. At very least she shouldn’t have been caught off guard like this. He wasn’t exactly quite when he moved without thinking. “You shouldn’t have. I didn’t hear you come in. I must be worse than I thought.”  
  
The twist out of his hold had also turned her back to him again. “When did this happen?” Steve touched the skin beside her cut. There was only a little inflammation, nothing to suggest infection. The stitches holding it closed were neat and we’ll placed, but he could see marks where smaller sutures had been taken out and replaced more than once.  
  
“In Vienna. I’ve had worse.” Amy snatched a towel off a hook and draped it over her shoulder. No weakness. She had already shown too much admitting that she was tired.  
  
It was his fault. She had only been in danger because of him. She should be somewhere safe. Resting. Not dragging herself all over the planet to get him out of trouble. “You shouldn’t have come with us. You should have stayed here. I should have--“  
  
“Relax Steve. What’s done is done.” Amy wished she could cuddle against him and make everything alright. There would be no cuddling, no matter how tempting he was. She needed to keep him at arms length. This was a long game.  
  
“Where else? Where else are you hurt?” That ragged gash would haunt him. He knew it would. She had been hurt this entire time. How had he not noticed that she was hurt? He shouldn’t have let her come to the raft with them. He should have made her stay here with Bucky.  
  
Amy ran a hand down his arm soothingly. Who was she kidding? Steve looked at her with those big worried eyes and she would do anything for him. “Shhh. Just some bumps and scratches. You’d hardly even know I was blown up.”  
  
It was the wrong thing to say. Amy knew that as soon as she said it. Her being blown up was a sore point for him. Not that she liked it either. It was defiantly happening more than she thought either of them would prefer. Nothing would do except him checking all her other lacerations and bruises. Pressing gently on the areas slowly moving from purple to green, a few more days and they would disappear completely.  
  
She would never admit to it, even under torture, but his warm hands did feel good on her sore body. Especially after her cold shower. He was always so gentle. The heat of his hands sinking into her skin made it hard to stop herself moaning in pleasure. There was a nasty bruise on her ribs from a chunk of concrete. It was in the right place to indicate broken ribs. It made sense that he wanted to investigate it in more detail. Amy wasn’t worried about him smoothing his fingers over the area curiously.  
  
Until he spoke.  
  
“I didn’t see it after you got it redone.”  
  
Shit. Shit. Shit. Amy clutched her towel around herself. Her tattoo. She had completely forgotten. She was tired and making sloppy mistakes. What next? Was she going to hand the Bucky a loaded gun and tell him she was going to murder Steve? She wasn’t an amateur. She was better than this. At least she was when her head wasn’t spinning, and her stomach wasn’t trying to make a break for it.  
  
“Before or after?” Steve cupped a hand around her ribs over the towel. Thumb resting where that white star had glowed against her skin. Covered by the thick towel now, but it was seared into his mind. It wasn’t just _a_ star. It was _his_ star. His star etched on her side right next to her heart. The tattoo recorded the most important moments of her life and he was there.  
  
Amy winced. That spot also left the heel of his hand directly over that nasty bruise. It was too warm. He was too close. Now that she was thinking again, she was remembering what a bad idea it was to let him touch her. “Does it matter?”  
  
“Yes.” Steve smoothed his thumb over the thick fluffy fabric. It was another sign that she loved him. And if she loved him, she would stay. If she stayed, they could get through anything.  
  
Amy sighed and moved away. She wouldn’t lie to him. “Before.”  
  
“You didn’t get it removed.” Steve leaned against the wall. Shower spray peppering his pants.  
  
“It took me neatly six months to find time to get it done in the first place, and….” It was him. He made her feel safe. Which was why she was letting her guard down. Too far down. She had almost said ‘and I still love you'. She wouldn’t have been able to recover from that slip. She had promised herself that she wouldn’t do anything to complicate his relationship with Bucky and confessing her love was high on the list of things that would complicate it. She hadn’t told him before she wouldn’t say it now. She swallowed hard, shaking her head to clear it. “Never mind.”  
  
Steve raised and eyebrow. A lot had happened in that pause. “And?”  
  
Fuck, he would choose _now_ to be observant wouldn’t he. She needed to say something true. Something that would obscure the full extent of the situation. He couldn’t know. It would be easier for him if he didn’t know. She stepped away again. It was too hard think with his hand on her ribs. “And we still happened. You were still important to me. I’m not ashamed of that.”  
  
Steve let her go. Just because he wanted to crush her to his chest and never let her go didn’t mean she was ready for that. He had asked a question, back when she had first saved them, and she hadn’t answered. Instead she’d just thrown herself back into danger with him. She had answered every other question. Some of them derisively, but she had answered. He wanted to hear the words. “Why did you come Amy? Why are you here instead of safely at home in Japan? Or anywhere where you’re not going to hurt because of me?”  
  
Amy’s jaw tightened. She didn’t need this. Not tonight. All she wanted tonight was a cold shower and a soft place to sleep. Not to have him dissect her motives.  
  
“Because I keep _my_ promises.” She hissed pushing past him. She had gotten her cold shower. She wasn’t about to let him keep her from sleeping.  
  
“What promise didn’t I keep?” Steve asked jolting away from the wall. He hadn’t lied to her. He had wanted to spend his life with her. She was the one who had left. She was the one who had walked out. She was always the one who walked out. Just like now.  
  
Steve sigh and reached over to turn off the water. He wasn’t being fair to her. He’d pushed her away as much as she had run. And he couldn’t forget that he hadn’t called her either.  
  
Maybe things would look better in the morning.


	18. Midnight Visitor

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Should they just sit down and have a conversation? Probably. Are they going to? Not tonight at least.

Amy was trying to sleep. It was going very poorly. She had taken a cold cloth and a bottle of sports drink with her to an empty bedroom and arranged her gear bags into a back rest. With Sam and Wanda sleeping off their ordeal, Natasha understanding that she wasn’t up to any sort of real conversation, and Steve avoiding her after the awkwardness in the shower, she should have been in the clear for a couple of hours at least.  
  
Unfortunately for her, Bucky had no compunction about cornering her for more information. He had walked in and perched himself on her windowsill, with clear indications that he would be staying there until he got his answers.  
  
“I thought you said it was over.” He didn’t want it to sound like an accusation. But the second she had gotten back Steve had followed her into the bathroom and had come back looking like a kicked puppy. Steve had avoided talking about the little Fox, which Bucky had mostly been okay with since he had wanted to talk about what he had done while he wasn’t himself. Then Steve had fallen asleep.  
  
Steve had looked so miserable in his sleep. Maybe it was all because of Bucky and the situation they were in. But Bucky thought Amy could probably take at least some of the blame off his shoulders. Bucky really wanted someone to share that guilt. He hated the idea that he was the reason Steve was sad.  
  
Amy swore to herself again. She was never going to get a to sleep at this rate. She was tired. Too tired to juggle being genuine with hiding her emotions. Couldn’t they just let her get a few hours sleep? Then she’d be able handle all of this. Maybe. Probably. It would help at least. “Aren’t you supposed to be resting.”  
  
She had spunk. Bucky had to give her that. She was irritated, but she wasn’t scared. He liked that about her, but he wasn’t looking to be babied right now. “I spent days in chryo. I don’t need a nap. Stop trying to change the subject.”  
  
Amy rubbed her temples. She just wanted to sleep. Sleep, and to figure out what exactly she was doing. “It is over.”  
  
Bucky frowned at her. He was pretty sure it was more complicated than that. “You love him, and he loves you.”  
  
Amy poured more water over the cloth that she had been using to block out the light. The cold was helping dampen her headache, if not curing it. “And that doesn’t change that it’s over. He doesn’t need me anymore.”  
  
He slipped to the floor, crossing his legs so he was sitting close, but not quite touching her. “Does he know?”  
  
“Know what?” Amy asked pressing the cool cloth to her eyes.  
  
“Does he know that you still love him?” Bucky growled jostling her knees.  
  
“There’s knowing, and there’s knowing. I never told him, and I don’t intend to tell him now.” She took another deep drink from her bottle. She needed calories, fluids, and rest. So much rest. If she could fall asleep and not wake up until this mess worked itself out that would be perfect.  
  
“Why not?” Bucky knew why _he_ had never told Steve he loved him. But Amy didn’t have that particular barrier. She could have a future with Steve. They could live together as man and wife and have dozens of beautiful babies.  
  
Amy sighed. He soul hurt enough without her looking too closely at the mess she had gotten herself into. “Because he’s also in love with someone else.”  
  
“Who?” Steve wasn’t the kind of guy to cheat on his girl. Was it Peggy? Steve had said Peggy was dead while they were catching up in the tent, but it had sounded recent. Maybe Amy couldn’t handle sharing Steve’s heart with Peggy even if she had been too old to be more than a friend anymore. Histories could be a real burden on a relationship, and Steve didn’t have a lot of experience juggling them. No experience really. Peggy had been the only gal to figure out how great Steve was before he got all big and strong. Bucky should have helped him with that, maybe then he and the little Fox could have made it work.  
  
Amy raised her eyebrows. Wasn’t it obvious who Steve was in love with? He hadn’t defied the UN for her. “You.”  
  
Bucky’s lips made tiny involuntary ‘o’. Was that possible? Could Steve feel the same way about him that he felt about Steve. No Steve loved Peggy and the little Fox. He’d never looked at Bucky the way he looked at them… Except for the times he had. Like when he’d rescued him in Austria, or on the helicarrier, or that first night in Mongolia when he had thought Bucky was asleep. Steve might just love him. And from the way Amy was acting she thought Steve loved him more than he loved her. Which was obviously a lot.  
  
Amy dug her hand into her still damp hair. She was more than a little over the idea of pretty boys having revelations about love while she was trying to recover. Maybe it was just her vanity, but she found it especially galling that they never seemed to have revelations about being in love with her. At least this time she didn’t have to be reassuring about the situation. “Was there anything else bothering you?”  
  
Bucky shuffled closer so he could pillow his head on the bag next to hers. Steve trusted her, he wanted to. The question was would she protect him or tell him the truth. “How many people did I hurt when I defrosted?”  
  
“Three. None of them seriously.” Amy answered automatically. She was surprised, she was well inside his personal space bubble now, but he didn’t seem to care.  
  
Bucky nodded thoughtfully. Factual. To the point. Kind in her directness. He could definitely trust her to tell him the truth the way he needed to hear it. “That’s what Steve said.”  
  
Amy rolled slightly onto her side so she could look at him better. “You didn’t believe him?”  
  
Bucky shrugged. He didn’t really want to tell her that it had been a test. “Thought he might be trying to shelter me.”  
  
“A valid concern.” Amy said shifting so she wasn’t putting pressure on her injured shoulder. Steve frequently wanted to shelter the people he cared about, even when it wasn’t good for them in the long run. Take Tony for example. She was glad he hadn’t this time. Trying to shelter Bucky here ran the risk of making him think the losses of control were his fault.  
  
Bucky turned the idea of Steve being so in love with him that he was willing to give up a girl like Amy over in his mind. “We used to… We used to wear each other’s dog tags. It was my idea. I told him some bullshit about it being for luck. That we couldn’t be captured or die while we were wearing the wrong tags because the fucking pencil pushers would track us down and bring us back to deal with the paperwork.” The truth had been more complicated. He had just wanted something of Steve’s to call his own.  
  
“I know. He was still wearing yours when he went down with the Valkyrie.” It had been the primary piece of evidence for a paper she’d never be allowed to publish. And the second time Furry had called her in to clean up an Avengers issue. The first had been to go through doctor Banner’s research and figure out if she could work backwards from it combined with what notes they had from Erskine to figure out the super soldier serum. She had told him honestly that even if she could, she wouldn’t. There were very few people she trusted with that kind of power. Steve was a rare creature. Rare, and valuable, and wonderful, and Bucky’s. Before anyone else, he was Bucky’s.  
  
Bucky studied her face. The little Fox was unreadable. “Did he know? Back then, did he know that I loved him? That he loved me?”  
  
“Not consciously. He figured it out later.” Amy sighed. How much easier would life have been if he had? It would have saved her at least one broken heart if nothing else.  
  
Bucky nodded stiffly. That was probably better. It would have hurt too much to know that Steve had been pining for him the way he had been pining for Steve and neither of them had made a move.  
  
Conversation lapsed. The two of them sitting close together in silence. Bucky almost, but not quite, close enough to touch Amy. Bucky had to admit it was nice. Being around someone who knew who he was and wasn’t scared of him.  
  
Amy was getting frustrated. It wasn’t that the silence was uncomfortable. In fact, she was surprised by how natural if felt. She didn’t want to make him leave, but she very much wanted to sleep, and those two things were incompatible.  
  
Bucky watched her curiously. The little Fox’s eyes kept closing and then jerking open. Her breathing was slow, but every now and then it hitched. He kept waiting for her to drift off entirely, but it never seemed to happen. “You’re not going to sleep if I stay, are you?”  
  
The corner of Amy’s mouth twitched. He had noticed. It was amazing how few people did. “Probably not no.”  
  
“I’ll let you sleep.” Bucky tried not to let his devastation show as he stood up. Steve would let him sleep in his room. Steve thought he _was_ asleep in his room. Amy would have been safer. She could bring him down when he lost control before anyone got hurt. Steve could probably restrain him, but he would get hurt trying.  
  
Amy sat up and wrapped her arms around her knees. He looked so hurt. “Bucky?”  
  
He stopped in the doorway. Looking back at her sadly. He didn’t want to scare any of Steve’s people. The little Fox was the toughest, after his little _Ryzhiy_. If she was too scared to sleep around him, what hope did he have with the others?  
  
Amy’s heart hammered in her chest. She didn’t talk to people about her weaknesses. And this was a weakness. He needed to know though. He couldn’t think this was his fault. “It isn’t you. The reason I can’t sleep. It’s not you. It’s…. I don’t…. It’s me. It’s not because I’m scared of you.”  
  
Bucky managed a smirk. He almost believed her. Almost. “You’re not scared of me?”  
  
Amy smirked right back. Poor boy. He was so used to being the biggest and the baddest, he couldn’t comprehend when he wasn’t. “I almost beat you when I was sixteen. I’m a big girl now, very few things scare me.”  
  
Bucky softened his smile. She really wasn’t scared of him. For him maybe. But not of him. “Good night, Amy.”


	19. Options

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Going to go ahead and throw a quick trigger warning on here. Bucky is not okay right now. If that's not something you want to read, go ahead and skip everything between the first two sets of *****

Steve didn’t like instant coffee, would be more than happy to skip it if he wasn't in desperate need of caffeine this morning. He'd hardly slept at all and he was going to have to be on his game for today.  
  
He understood why instant was what Amy had in field kit. But that didn’t mean he had to like it. Although, like with pretty much everything Amy related, this instant coffee was better than most of the stuff he’d had.  
  
“What now?” Bucky concealed his ruined shoulder against the kitchen door-frame. He didn’t want to see the way Steve’s face fell every time he saw the place where the arm should be. Most of the pain was gone. The doctors and little Shuri had cleaned up the stump. Bucky didn’t really miss the arm itself. He hated that damn thing.  
  
“I don’t know Buck…” Steve looked down at the oily brown liquid that sloshed in his mug. How was he going to keep everyone safe? Sam, Wanda, Nat, they had given up everything to help him. And for what? All the other Winter Soldiers had been dead. How different would things have been if he had insisted, they turn themselves in after Bucky’s breakout? Would Zemo still have found a way to tell Tony about his parents? Would they be in jail right now? Or would they have been able talk their way into house arrest at the compound?  
  
Or Katsura.  
  
Amy was here now, if she’d thrown her power and personality into the effort, she probably could have convinced the powers that be to give her custody. House arrest at the Fox Pavilion sounded pretty good right now. Bucky would have liked Katsura.  
  
Bucky. What was he going to do about Bucky? He loved him. Right now, Bucky needed a friend, just a friend. Steve would do everything he could to protect him. Which today meant leaving him. Something told him, Bucky wasn’t going to love that idea. Steve didn’t. There weren't a lot of better options. He just had to convince Bucky of that.  
  
“Nat and I are going to go lay a false trail. After that… Well it isn’t the first time we’ve been thrown into a crazy new world.” Someone had tipped the UN off that they were in Africa. They needed to be seen somewhere as far away as possible as quickly as possible. Ideally all of them but him and Natasha, if Sam was up for it having him along would be ideal. Amy could hold the fort with Bucky and Wanda. Unless… “You gonna be alright without me for a couple of days?”  
  
“Don’t worry about me.” Bucky moved fully into the kitchen to lean against the counter next to Steve. Steve loved him. That was why he couldn’t just turn himself in and beg forgiveness. Worrying and trying to protect Bucky had essentially stolen Steve’s life.  
  
Steve took another long drink of his coffee. Bitter and gritty. He really hated instant coffee. “Yeah, that’s not about to happen. Amy should be able to handle anything a jerk like you can throw at her.”  
  
“I bet she can. Get out of here, you punk.” Bucky punched him in the shoulder. He had something resembling a plan. If it went the way he thought it would, Steve’s life would get a lot easier.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky focused intently at the gun resting on the table. He had liberated it from Natasha’s things on the off chance he would get this opportunity. It was for the best really. Everyone would be better off this way. He had tried staying away. It hadn't worked. They had tried containing him. It hadn’t worked. Trying to keep him safe was only putting people in danger. Steve, _Ryzhiy_ , everyone would be better off without him.  
  
A naked sword clattered onto the table, knocking the gun aside. “It’s down and to the left. If you’re going to do something do it properly.”  
  
He looked up at Amy. He had thought she was out of the suite. Wasn't she supposed to be figuring out how her ambassador thing was going to work all day? How had she known what he was doing? “This is the best option.”  
  
“If you say so.” Amy shrugged not letting herself give any of her internal thoughts away. “It’s rather messy though. You should put down a sheet. Otherwise you pretty much have to refinish the floor. At least it isn’t tile, grout is a pain.”  
  
That sounded like experience. He looked at the shining metal blade she had dropped in front of him. It was obviously razor sharp, the blade only about a foot and a half long, perfect for confined spaces... or for this. “Will it hurt?”  
  
“Yes. But not for long. That’s why I’m here.” She raised the second sword she was still holding.  
  
Bucky stared at the sword on the table again. Watery ripples ran the length of the blade, there were flowers cut out of the guard, and the grip was wrapped in soft navy cord. It was too pretty for this sort of thing, but this was what it was made for. Like the little fox. Beautiful, but cold. “Steve will be better off without me. He will be able to live his life if he doesn’t have to worry about me.”  
  
Amy snorted. “You’re clearly still delusional if you think Steve will survive this.”  
  
Bucky bristled. What did she know? Steve was a survivor, nothing had ever been able to kill him, and he had so much to live for now. Without him to complicate things everything would be easier for him. He could turn himself in. They would forgive him. He was Captain America after all. “He did last time.”  
  
“It took him 48 hours to destroy the people thought were responsible for your death and crash a plane into the arctic ocean. I’ve seen the maps. He could have landed it. He didn’t want to stay in a world without you in it.” Amy responded blandly. Steve hadn’t survived. Not really. How did you survive without half your soul?  
  
Bucky traced the pattern on the blade. On closer inspection it looked more like mountains than water. If he didn’t do this, he might kill Steve. If he did, it might kill him anyway. Amy’s face was still blank, not giving him anything to go on in terms of her real thoughts. She loved Steve. She would stop him from doing anything stupid. “You’ll be there to get him through. He loves you.”  
  
Amy shook her head. He really didn’t understand. Steve wasn't calm rational Captain America when it came to Bucky. If he was they wouldn't be in this mess. “When he finds out I didn’t stop you. Worse that I helped you. Steve will kill me for this. Probably not on purpose, but then it is you. He isn’t always rational when it comes to you. He’ll snap my neck and then he’ll take that gun you so thoughtfully brought with you and kill himself. He’s lost his county, his purpose, and most of his chosen family.” Amy knelt and folded her hand over his, pulling it away from the sword hilt. “You are all he has left. To say nothing of Nat. It would break her heart to lose you so soon after getting you back. People care about you Bucky baby. Doing this won’t protect them. It will only hurt them.”  
  
“I’ve caused so much pain in the world.” Bucky’s voice cracked. For the first time in years he was in charge of his own mind and didn’t have a mission. He had no idea what he was supposed to do with his life. Almost all of his memories were terrible.  
  
Amy took his hand and drew it further away from the blade. “The best way to prove you aren’t the unfeeling automaton they tried to turn you into is to be happy.”  
  
“How do you do that?” Bucky asked clinging desperately to her hand. She felt solid, stable, real.  
  
Amy smiled. Asking questions was a good sign. Wanting more information was a sign of planning for the future. “Reach for something you want, rather than run away from something you’re scared of.”  
  
*****  
  
The suite was too quiet today. Amy couldn’t wait for Nat and the boys to get back. Not just because she was worried about Bucky. Yesterday was not the sort of thing that you could just forget about. If Nat and Steve were here, she could be confident that he would be surrounded by people who loved and cared about him at all times. Instead she was doing her best to appear where he was at regular intervals without making him feel like she was following him. Conveniently he seemed to be trying to keep an eye on her too. Most of his morning had been spent sitting in the hall outside the room Amy had selected as a dojo, just out of sight if you weren't standing in the door.  
  
Amy had left him alone while she showered, expecting him to be sitting in the kitchen. The end of the island had a good view of the bathroom door. It was where she would have perched if she was trying to wait for someone without making it obvious that she was waiting for them.  
  
He wasn’t there. He also wasn’t staring out the window in the living room. Which left the bedroom wing. She padded towards the hall, towelling her hair. There was a strong possibility that he had thought her shower would take longer than it had, and she was going to catch him going through her things. She didn’t think there was anything she would be embarrassed for him to find. Everything in her bags was purely practical right now. She hadn’t even replaced her condom stash since that night in Paris.  
  
Bucky wasn’t rummaging through Amy’s things. He was staked out in the hallway, sitting on the floor, his back pressed into the corner of the wall. Barefoot, dressed in the sweatpants he had been wearing since he’d woken up and Steve’s hoodie, rolling the Fairbairn-Skyes dagger from the gear he had been given between his fingers.  
  
Amy slid down the wall next to him. He was clearly on edge, but more present than yesterday. He could never know how much he had scared her yesterday. Or that she had stayed awake last night listening for any movement in his room. “There you are. Do you want something to eat?”  
  
Bucky couldn’t tear his eyes away from Wanda’s door. Of all the people Steve had brought into his life, she was the biggest enigma. “She hasn’t come out since they left.”  
  
Amy sighed and leaned against his shoulder. He was right about Wanda. The drugs should have cleared her system by now. She needed to get up and move around. At least shower and put on some cleaning clothes. “She’s had a bad couple of weeks. They had her pretty drugged up to keep her under control. You know what that sort of thing can do to your mental stability.”  
  
Bucky tipped his head. If he was going to stay and be part of Steve’s life, he was going to do it right. If he was going to live, he was going to _live_. Part of that was looking after the people Steve cared about not just Steve. “Do you think I should talk to her? I know what it feels like to hurt people you care about.”  
  
Amy pursed her lips. In her experience the kind of mental strain Wanda was under led to poor control of one’s power. The last thing they needed was for Wanda to spook and give Bucky one of her nightmare visions. She did not want to know what the Winter Soldier’s greatest fear was, or what he would do to get away from it. He wasn't wrong though. Locking herself up like this wasn't helping anyone. “I think you should probably give her space until she has herself a little more under control. I'll talk to her.”  
  
*****  
  
“Hey boo.” Amy knelt next to Wanda’s blankets and rubbed her back. “Do you want to talk about it?”  
  
Wanda sniffed and peaked out from under her pillow. “I broke up the Avengers. This is all my fault.”  
  
“Oh?” Amy settled with her back against the wall. Miss placed guilt was something she understood. Wanda didn’t need to carry the weight of this on her own. “You wrote the accords? You made Tony sign? You made Steve not sign? You built Ultron? You made Steve and Tony so diametrically opposed, suborn, and convinced they are right? Figured out where the Winter Soldier was and triggered him?”  
  
“Lagos was me.” Wanda said defensively rolling over to glare up at Amy.  
  
“Lagos was not your fault.” Amy smoothed Wanda’s hair back from her face. Wanda needed soft reassurance, but she also needed to know why everything had gone wrong if it wasn’t her fault. Someday she would have enough experience to figure it out on her own, but they needed to support her while she gained that experience. “You want someone to blame. Blame me. I should have vetted the information I gave Sam better. Or I should have taken care of Rumlow myself. I of all people know how Steve is when people tug on the wrong heartstring. Steve should have kept his head. Nat should behave known they weren’t going for the police station. Sam should have done a better job of tracking them so Rumlow couldn’t surprise any of you. Baby girl, you’re still learning. Your teachers are supposed to protect you from this sort of thing. Your teachers didn’t do their jobs.”  
  
“There is a lot of blame to go around. It certainly doesn’t all rest on you.” Amy rubbed Wanda’s arm reassuringly. “I’m not saying you didn’t do anything wrong. I’m saying you’re a human and humans make mistakes. Even the great ones.”  
  
"I know it feels like the end of the world, but it will all be okay in the end." Amy gave her hair one last affectionate caress and rocked to her feet. "Call if you need anything, and try and get some real sleep."  
“Hey Amy?” Wanda’s voice was still shaky, but she sounded a little less devastated.  
  
“Yeah boo?” Amy looked back at her maternally.  
  
Wanda rubbed the heel of her hand over her eyes to scrub away the tear tracks. “Thanks.”  
  
“Keep that feeling in mind when I wake you up for naginata practice in the morning. This is your last day of moping.” Amy smiled down at her. She would be alright. It would take time and support from the people who cared her, but she would be.


	20. Daydreams and Nightmares

Bucky refused move while Amy was talking to Wanda. He stayed sitting in the hall, knife walking between his fingers and rolling around his hand. He was having a hard time keeping track of exactly how long had passed. He couldn’t decide if it was taking too long, or if she had only just gone in.  
  
Finally, the door clicked open. Bucky’s eyes snapped up. The knife spinning in his hand even without him looking at it. Amy was back. Intact and calm, if not actually relaxed.  
  
Amy slid down the wall next to him again. They were all pretty worn down today. If they were in Kyoto right now, she would be able to order them all comfort food and they could take a nice long soak. She shouldn’t be thinking about Kyoto. She would only make herself homesick.  
  
Instead she focused on the knife in Bucky’s hand. The way the mat blade caught the light as he flipped it over and around his hand was hypnotic. She didn’t know a lot of people who were as dexterous with a weapon as he was, fewer still who would be able to maintain that dexterity if they lost a hand.  
  
Bucky tossed the knife high, flipping it end over end twice before he caught it. Showing off for pretty girls had always been a weakness. “Is she going to be alright?”  
  
Amy fluffed her still damp hair. She shouldn’t stair. “With some time and some more reassurance, I think so.”  
  
Bucky sighed and leaned against Amy’s side. The knife stilling in his hand. “Can I sleep in your room tonight?”  
  
Amy squeezed his knee. “Nights are hard, hmm?”  
  
“Yeah.” Bucky turned his face into her neck, getting a lung full of the sent of her perfume in the process. She was sweet, slightly smoky. He liked that smell. It didn’t remind him of anything but the little Fox.  
  
The sensation of his breath tickling her neck crystallised her decision. There was something so soft an vulnerable about the feeling. If he needed her, she would be there. She could sleep later. “I’ll crash in with you.”  
  
“Will you sleep?” Bucky rolled the knife around his fingers. She had said she didn’t sleep around other people, but he needed someone tonight. He didn’t think he could handle being alone.  
  
Amy kissed the top of his head, the same way she would a small worried child. “You will.”  
  
*****  
  
A cool evening breeze wafted through the living room. Amy sat braced in the open French door, back on one side feet on the other, holding herself a few inches off the ground. Setting up a new embassy even as a cover required a lot back and forth with the Japanese foreign office. They were taking the whole thing more in stride than she had expected. Whatever apparently highly public stunt T’Challa had pulled in Korea had convinced them that allying her country with Wakanda was a good idea. She had spent most of the afternoon answering one email after another while Bucky poked around the kitchen trying to scrounge a meal out of the scraps they had on hand.  
  
The soup he had cobbled together had actually been reasonably good. The task seemed to have relaxed him. Now that all the dishes were washed and drying, he was slightly lost again.  
  
Amy was surprised when Bucky shoved his head into her lap and dragged her arm around his shoulders. She hadn’t realised he was a cuddler. She could fill in for now. He’d have Steve and Nat back to maul soon enough. She returned her attention to her phone absently stroking his hair. Amy enjoyed this, platonic cuddling was a peaceful way to spend an evening. Maybe they could still do it occasionally even after the others were back, and the things she had sent for arrived. It would be even more comfortable on a couch.  
  
She considered that thought for a second while a secure document opened. It was odd. She hated cuddling with guys she slept with, Steve was the only exception to that rule. Even Brian, who was unambiguously one of her best friends, got banished to the other side of the bed or couch when they were relaxing after sex. She didn’t mind Kiki or Dai when they wanted physical affection, but she rarely initiated it herself. Not that she’d initiated this, but she would consider inviting him to sit with her in the future. Less than a week knowing him and already she was willing to let one of the biggest threats she had ever encountered encroach on her personal space. Was it just because Steve loved him?  
  
No. It was because despite being incredibly dangerous, he was also incredibly helpless and sweet. Like a lion cub, or a wolf pup. She moved her hand from his hair to his arm. He was a predator the same way she was, and like her, he needed a pack to keep him safe. She could help with that, for a while at least.  
  
Bucky ran his hand absently up and down her shin. He wished Steve and Natasha were back. Or for the past week and a half to never have happened. He wasn’t picky really. He wanted his family back around him, or to be safely back in his apartment in Bucharest where he hadn’t been a threat to anyone.  
  
His fingers froze near Amy’s ankle. There was a strap there. He explored further. Secured to the inside of her leg, just inside the cuff of her tight pant like things, was a small flat blade. Little Fox was armed. Not that he wasn’t. But he was still a little surprised. Were there others? He wondered. He’d been watching her most of the day without noticing this one. There could be more. Would she let him search? Probably not. But she’d might tell him if he asked.  
  
Something moved outside the suite. Amy stilled Bucky’s hand before he could draw her knife. Three body’s moving slowly, but not stealthily. It was their people, not a threat.  
  
Natasha opened the door and ushered Steve and Sam inside. They were all tired, Sam had a large mud stain on his pants, but they were all uninjured and they were back safe.  
  
“Welcome back.” Amy smiled and let her hand drop from Bucky’s arm. She wouldn’t blame him if he wanted to throw himself at Steve and crush him until he couldn’t breath. She was almost tempted herself.  
  
“Anything interesting happen while we were away?” Steve asked shrugging out of his jacket. Amy and Bucky were cuddling. There was a small chance he had fallen asleep on the jet and this was all a dream. He didn't think he had though. Dreams didn't normally feature muscle fatigue.  
  
Amy looked down at Bucky still leaning against her legs. He would tell Steve when he was ready to tell Steve, until then it would be enough to subtly let the others know to keep an eye on him. That could happen in the morning. She wasn’t worried about him doing anything regrettable tonight. Not when all the tension had melted out of him at the sound of Steve’s voice. “Nothing worth mentioning.”  
  
“That’s not true.” Bucky squeezed her knee. He appreciated that she wasn’t going to cause a scene over his low point yesterday. He didn’t think the little Fox was much of one for scenes, she was too reserved and low-key for that sort of thing. A real lady, shying away from anything crass or uncouth. He was a Brooklyn boy though. Loud messy scenes were just a fact of life where he had grown up and he had one he kind of needed to get out of his system. “Amy told me about what happened after I fell off the train in Switzerland.”  
  
“Oh?” Steve shifted awkwardly. He had never missed his shield as much as he did right now. There was no way Bucky was going to approve of anything that happened between Switzerland and the point he hit the ice. None of it could be described as ‘looking after himself and steering clear of trouble’ which were what Bucky was always telling him to do.  
  
Bucky smacked Steve up the side of his head with an open palm. “You reckless idiot.”  
  
“Well looks like I successfully set a cat among these particular pigeons. I’m going to turn in.” Amy patted Bucky’s cheek softly. “Don’t be too hard on him, he’s only an idiot for the people he cares about.”  
  
“You do like causing trouble, don’t you?” Nat said following Amy towards the bedrooms. Behind her, Steve was desperately trying to explain himself. From the sound of it, Bucky wasn’t buying his excuses.  
  
Amy linked arms with her friend. “I’m terribly good at it.”  
  
*****  
  
It was a shout woke Amy shortly before dawn. It wouldn’t have taken something loud. She had been dozing more than actually asleep. The shout was loud, full of mixed surprise and fear. It had come from Steve’s room.  
  
Steve couldn’t move. He was tied up somehow. They’d been captured. They couldn’t capture Bucky. Steve needed to get him out of her. He didn’t care what happened to him as long as Bucky was free and safe. He thrashed and squirmed. Trying to free himself. Whatever they had him tied up in only twisted tighter around him. He hit his head against something hard. A wall? He struggled away from sleep and the nightmares that were at least half of what was trapping him. “Bucky! Where’s Bucky?”  
  
“In his room.” Amy said freeing Steve’s arm from the blankets before he could rip them. She’d let Bucky sleep alone tonight since Steve and Natasha were back. Maybe she should have made the boys move into the same room. Too late now. “Go back to sleep.”  
  
“I can’t I have to…” Steve trailed off. _In his room_. Amy was here. Bucky had a room of his own. Wakefulness bit at the edges of his sleep fogged panic. They were in Wakanda. Everything was fine. It didn’t feel like everything was fine. It felt like his heart was going to explode out of his chest.  
  
“Here.” Amy set her hand against his cheek. Sparks dancing on her fingers. “I’m not doing this all the time, so don't get used to it.”  
  
The wave of calm confidence hit him all at once, crushing his panic. The icy shock of her pulling her hand away hit him just as hard. He wanted to grab it back. Keep it against his face. Even without the magic it would help him stay grounded. She was drawing away already. Sitting back on her heels and unwinding the blankets wrapped around his legs without meeting his eyes.  
  
“Go check on him, it will help.” She hesitated. It wasn’t really her place to say anything. But the sooner they started leaning on each other the easier it would be one everyone. “Maybe think about bunking together. I bet he'd like to know you’re there and safe when he wakes up too.”  
  
“Are you….” Are you what? How did he think he was going to end that sentence? Are you going to be here when I get back? Coming with me? Sure we can do this? He couldn’t ask any of those questions. She had come for them. Found them somewhere safe. He couldn’t ask for anything more. “…going back to bed?”  
  
Amy shook her head. “No, I think I’m up for the day. I'll grab a coffee and then do some training.”  
  
*****  
  
Making coffee helped Amy find her centre. Adding a ton of almond milk would help her stomach from rebelling in a few hours. Thank the gods for individual shelf stable packets. They were the only thing that made the instant coffee drinkable in the first place. She leaned forward on her elbows cradling the warm mug. She could do this. She could keep them safe and help them find their way without breaking her own heart. She just had to stay focused and not let herself get distracted.  
  
The footsteps were almost silent on the hardwood floor. Even Amy might have missed them if she wasn’t so on edge. “You’re louder than Nat.”  
  
“You all call her that. Why?” Bucky boosted himself onto the counter opposite her. He had a lot of questions if he was going to stay with these people. Which he still wasn’t entirely convinced was a good idea. He could snap and kill them all at any moment. They didn’t need that in their lives.  
  
“It’s the name she picked.” Amy shrugged. She turned to face him. He looked awful. Dark circles under his eyes. An almost imperceptible tremor in his hands. He looked strung out. Like he was coming in from the field, not from his own safe bed. “Why are you up?”  
  
“Never went to sleep. Too big of a risk.” He had spent the night sitting quietly in his room, listening for threats. He could feel the nightmares waiting for him. And the dark place where he couldn’t control his actions.  
  
Amy frowned. He was a soldier. He should know better than to avoid rest when you could get it. If he wasn’t sleeping, it was because something was wrong. “Barnes...”  
  
Bucky cut her off. He didn’t really want a lecture. “Call me Bucky. I think we’re there.”  
  
“Bucky. You need to sleep.” Amy crossed the kitchen to lean next to his knees. He needed somewhere he could feel safe. Amy could only think of one place that would qualify without reservation. And it would help Steve get some real rest too. “Why not crawl in with Steve? He’ll look after you.”  
  
Bucky couldn’t look at her. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to hold Steve all night. It was that he didn’t trust himself. How would he forgive himself if something happened? If he hurt Steve… “You probably think I should have gone to him for help as soon as I started to remember.”  
  
Amy dropped her eyes to the creamy liquid in her mug. Going to people for help was a glass house she wasn't about to start throwing stones in. “I think you did what you thought you had to do at the time.”  
  
“I think I killed people to show them that killing is wrong.” Bucky grumbled clenching and in clenching his fist.  
  
“Really?” Amy looked up at him surprised. Sure, the people had been hunting had all killed people. But that was far from the worst thing they had done. “I had assumed it was the mind control thing that bothered you.”  
  
Bucky shrugged but didn’t say anything. His reasons had felt clear while he was moving. Everything was less sure when he was sitting still.  
  
“He had a nightmare about losing you tonight.” Amy stirred her coffee, looking out the window at the predawn world instead of at Bucky.  
  
Bucky hugged himself, rubbing his side. He felt cold. Not physically, more spiritually. “I heard.”  
  
Amy watched him in her peripheral vision. He had heard, and he couldn’t sleep, but he hadn’t gone to check on Steve. And Steve hadn’t gone to check on him. They were going to difficult about this, weren’t they? “He used to have them a lot.”  
  
Bucky leaned against Amy. “What does you mean when all your worst dreams are about someone else?”  
  
Amy downed the rest of her coffee. This was not the time for existential questions. It was time for the idiots who loved each other to curl up together so they could stop worrying about each other. “Come on. I already helped Steve relax so he could go back to sleep. Might as well do you too.”  
  
Amy tugged Bucky into Steve’s room. It was rarely too late to fix something simple like this. “Look who I found wandering around.”  
  
“Buck?” Steve rubbed his eyes. Was he dreaming again? Amy showing up with Bucky in the middle of the night. It had to be a dream. A better one than his last one at least. Amy’s visit earlier must have worked. He almost would have preferred a Peggy dream. Those were never as complicated.  
  
“It makes significantly more sense for the two of you to share a room than for me to spend my nights running back and forth trying to get you both to sleep.” Amy moved around the room confidently laying out more blankets next to Steve and subtly shepherding Bucky into them.  
  
Steve bumped his shoulder against Bucky’s. “You alright, Buck?”  
  
Bucky shifted a little closer to Steve. He was better than alright. Sleeping next to Steve sounded amazing. He hated being alone at night, he’d liked the idea of the little Fox keeping an eye on him, but he loved the idea of sharing a room with Steve. When they were in the same room Bucky could be sure his little punk hadn’t died in his sleep or snuck off to get himself into trouble. “I’m tired.”  
  
“And that is a fixable problem.” Amy reached for Bucky’s hand. Relaxation flowed down her arms in little rivulets of sparks. “Snuggle up, Bucky baby.”  
  
Bucky looked up at her confused. Snuggle up? He was already too close to Steve for polite company. Not that he didn’t want to be. He was just surprised that she was encouraging him. Did Steve know? Amy had said that Steve loved him. It was hard to really concentrate on the implications of that with Amy’s calming sparks washing over him. Slowly Bucky muscles unwound, and he slumped into Steve’s side. His eyelids heavy. He blinked slowly a few times and then sleep took him.  
  
Steve smiled softly at Amy. She was so good to his boy. Maybe she would stay until Bucky woke up. He would like that, they both would. He closed his eyes, tucked his head against Bucky’s shoulder. It wouldn’t be fair to ask her though. She wouldn’t get any sleep.  
  
“Sleep tight boys.” Amy managed to restrain her impulse to kiss them both on the forehead. She couldn’t quite stop herself from pulling the blankets up to their chins and tucking them in firmly. They looked so perfect together.


	21. Sweet Dreams

Amy collapsed on the floor breathing hard. An hour of sustained naginata practice and a half hour of sword had helped to take the edge off her anxiety. It had also left her injured shoulder screaming at her, but that was to be expected. She still wanted something. No someone. She wanted Dai. He was still furious for what he saw as her giving up her life for someone who had broken her heart more than once. If she called and confessed any hesitation on her part, he would just pressure her to come home.  
  
Kiki was on Dai's side. She wanted Amy to be her security and help raise her son when he was born, not live halfway around the world with people who were breaking her heart just by existing. Amy’s brothers were off the table. She couldn’t exactly tell them that her new job was largely a cover for her helping Captain America and the Winter Soldier. Something told her they wouldn’t approve of her living with several people wanted for what were officially being called war crimes, no matter how platonic she managed to keep things. She wasn’t even convinced she should tell her therapist about this. Not until he had been re-veted and she was sure he wouldn’t tell anyone, regardless of what the professional guidelines said one was supposed to do when your client was involved in a crime. She was pretty far down the list, but she still had one option. She didn’t have to give him details after all.  
  
“Did you forget the time difference or is this an emergency?” Brian’s voice was groggy over the phone.  
  
Amy grimaced knowing that he couldn’t see her anyway. If she was honest it was a bit of both. She had forgotten that he was two hours behind her, it was early to call someone here which meant it was indecent to call someone there. But she also needed to have this conversation before anyone else in the suite woke up. He would survive. And he still owed her for the appendicitis thing. “I need you to tell me I’m not an idiot.”  
  
Brian Hummed thoughtfully. She could picture him rolling over in bed and flipping on the light. Giving the call his full attention. He was a good friend. “If you’re calling me for that, then you have ruled out at least five people you trust because you don’t think they’ll give you the answer you want to hear, and I don’t think I can contradict them.”  
  
He was a terrible friend. She should have let him have his field appendectomy without her help.  
  
Amy’s vengeful thoughts evidently didn’t translate into something Brain could hear over the phone line. After a pause during which she could hear him moving to the kitchen, probably to make tea, he spoke again. Still calm and friendly. “Want to tell me why you’re _not_ an idiot?”  
  
She considered various ways of explaining her predicament. ‘well you see, I’ve decided to help the love of my life go on the lamb with the man he loves and now I’m actively encouraging them to get together.’ 'I heavily implied to Steve that I was over him and he should make a move on Barnes.’ 'I'm living with my ex and the deadliest assassin in a century, who is in love with him… did I mention said assassin is really cute and likes to cuddle?’ They all sounded terrible. “I really don’t.”  
  
Brian laughed it was obvious he had some idea what had her confidence so shaken. Amy suspect his idea didn’t even come close. “I’ll change the subject. Hypothetical question.”  
  
“Hypothetical answer.” Amy quipped back.  
  
“If someone knew where Falcon was, and knew that he needed somewhere to lay low long term, do you think that hypothetical person would tell him to try me?” The words came out as a rush.  
  
Amy pondered that suggestion. It wasn’t a terrible idea. Definitely something that it couldn’t hurt to have in their back pocket. Steve would hate it. “Hypothetically, I would think Falcon would try to stay with his team and his whole team would draw too much attention in the UK. But if, Hypothetically, they started talking about breaking into smaller groups, then I suspect someone would drop your name into conversation.”  
  
“God, I was so worried about him. I’m not saying I’m glad he broke out…”  
  
Amy knew where he was going with that train of thought. “But you’re so fucking glad he broke out before they started 'interrogating' him?”  
  
“Yeah…” Bri trailed off. Amy suspected he was panicking about all the things that could have happened to Sam if they hadn’t got him out in time.  
  
There were noises elsewhere in the suite now. “I should go.”  
  
“Aims?” Brian said before she could hang up.  
  
“Yeah?”  
  
“You’re not an idiot. You’re in love. It can look similar.” He reassured gently. Amy should have known he would take the romantic view over the practical one. “And call Daisuke, he might not understand but he loves you.”  
  
“Thanks, Bri.” Amy rubbed her eyes. She should get a hold of Dia today, check on how everything was going. Let him grill her on what exactly she was thinking. “Call if there are any developments in the man hunt.”  
  
“I will.” Brian disconnected the call on his end. Leaving Amy listening to someone making coffee in the kitchen and her own breathing.  
  
Amy set her phone flat on her face. Talking to Brian had helped a little. She still wasn’t sure any of this was a good idea.  
  
*****  
  
The chatter out of Serbia was very confused. The good news was most of the UN security council agreed that it was the most likely hiding place for the fugitives. The bad news was one of the stronger branches of the mafia was claiming to have the Winter Soldier on payroll, which was not ideal.  
  
Someone would have to stop by and talk to them about that. She made a note to tell Nat about it so they could start on a plan. She couldn’t be the one to go have that conversation.  
  
“Aims?” Bucky leaned nervously against her door frame. He needed her, but he didn’t want to impose. She had said come to him with anything. This was such a little thing though. He should be able to handle it on his own.  
  
“Yeah Bucky?” Amy smiled up at him reassuringly.  
  
“I can’t sleep.” She had helped last night. Bucky felt sure she would help again tonight.  
  
She knew the feeling. Really, she should be sleeping herself. Not combing through chatter, obsessing over whether Steve and Nat’s ruse had been successful. Well there was no reason for them both to be miserable, not when she could solve his problem at least. Amy set her computer aside and rolled to her feet. “Come on. I’ll keep the nightmares away.”  
  
She debated setting him up in his own bed. In the long run both he and Steve would sleep better if they just gave in and slept in the same room. They both _wanted_ to know where the other was at all times. They both liked having someone to cuddle. It just made sense.  
  
Steve was sprawled across the blankets. Amy knew that sprawl. Steve was looking for someone to cuddle. Even in his sleep Steve was adorable. Amy smacked the arm draped over Bucky’s pillow. “Shove over bed hog. Your boy needs his rest.”  
  
Bucky rolled into bedding fitting himself against Steve’s side. He made a point of taking Steve’s hand so the larger man couldn’t escape him. If he was allowed to sleep with Steve, he wanted to sleep in contact with Steve. When he woke up, he wanted to know instantly where Steve was.  
  
Amy pressed a hand to his forehead. Pouring dreamy calm into him. Let them both sleep tonight. The sweet uninterrupted sleep of two people safe and in love.  
  
Steve caught her hand as she pulled away. “What about my girl?” He asked stroking her wrist. Something had been shadowing her eyes since he had gotten back.  
  
Amy gently removed his hand. “ _I_ will be fine. Just… poke me or something if it looks like I’m having a nightmare.” Or a dissociative hallucination, which was more likely given her sleep habits. She could always steal a nap tomorrow.  
  
Amy curled a hand around the back of Bucky’s neck, a few sparks drifting from her fingers. Her eyes were heavy. She let them fall softly closed. She would just get herself centred and meditate a little in place of real sleep.  
  
*****  
  
Amy’s eyes snapped open. Birds. Those were birds singing outside the window. Dawn birds. I couldn’t be dawn. If it was dawn that meant she had slept. And she couldn’t have slept. Not with Bucky in the room. Probably not even with Steve in the room these days.  
  
She sat up and rubbed her neck. The muscles on the right side were completely knotted up and her stomach was trying to crawl out her throat. The stomach made sense. It was never happy with her the day after she used her powers. What had happened last night? Had she crashed and passed out? Was she that drained? She didn’t think so. Her headache wasn’t bad enough for that.  
  
“Hey.” The whispered word interrupted her panic spiral. Bucky was blinking up at her sleepily. “Did you hurt your neck?”  
  
Amy smoothed his hair back. So much worry in those scared eyes. This was obviously where Steve had learned to be a mother hen. “Bit of a crick. I should have grabbed a pillow. I didn’t think I’d fall asleep like I did.”  
  
“You should have just used me. Not like I’m going anywhere.” He lay back and bit his lip enticingly. Flirting with the little Fox was fun, and he felt especially flirty after a good night’s sleep.  
  
Amy snorted. If that wasn't an invitation to die for. “You’re feeling better this morning.”  
  
Before Bucky could respond, Steve grumbled in his sleep and rolled over, wrapping his arms around his waist. Amy took advantage of the distraction to slip out of the blankets.  
  
Bucky looked between Steve's arm and Amy. He didn’t want to leave Steve, but he also didn’t want to let the woman who was helping him suffer alone. If she needed help with her neck, he would go with her.  
  
Amy ran a hand through his hair again. She could see the conflict in his eyes. Let them stay where they belonged, together. “You stay with him. I’m just going to go apply some heat.”


	22. A New Normal

A heat pack for her neck helped with her physical discomfort. There was only one person she trusted right now to help with her mental state. No more hiding and avoiding the people who cared about her. It was time to call Dai.  
  
The phone rang three times without anyone picked up. Amy listened to each electronic burr with a lump in her throat. She needed Dai, why wasn’t he answering?  
  
Finally, there was a click on the other end of the line.  
  
“What am I doing?” Amy blurted before Dai could say anything.  
  
“I’ve been asking that since the beginning.” Dai always took her in stride. That was one of the things she loved about him. He never wasted time with silly questions.  
  
“They are safe now. I should just come home.” Amy couldn’t stay still. She needed to move. Ideally, she needed to run until she couldn’t breath anymore and all her limbs felt watery. She also needed to talk this out.  
  
“I can have a flight there for you in six hours.”  
  
“I have responsibilities at home.” The dojo room was 15 paces across. 12 and a half if she didn’t regulate her stride. 11 tatami mats across, with an uncovered border around the outside edge. That would bother her. At home rooms fitted things properly. At home things met her exacting specifications and nothing was _uncomfortable_.  
  
Here even her skin felt too tight, too warm. That might be the cut on her shoulder as it finished healing, or it might be the way Steve had looked at her when he was falling asleep.  
  
“Kiki is going a little crazy on bed rest of nothing else.”  
  
It wasn’t just work. She had a life outside of Steve, and Bucky, and all their issues. “I have my academic work.”  
  
“Oxford was just asking about having you come in and do a lecture series to provide context for the accords.”  
  
“And it isn’t like they _need_ me for anything.” Amy tossed herself onto the floor. Ignoring the fact she had just done the math on how to cover it if she was staying. They _didn't_ need her. There were other options. She just happened to be the best and easiest temporary solution.  
  
“They are grown-ups. They will be fine on their own.”  
  
There were so many reasons for her to go home. “If I stay, I’ll end up missing London Fashion Week.”  
  
“You haven’t missed London in years.”  
  
Amy rolled back to her feet. She really couldn’t sit still. “Staying is a terrible idea. I don’t want to sit around while they fall even more in love with each other.”  
  
“Who wants to watch their ex start a new relationship?”  
  
fifteen paces one way, fifteen the other. “The embassy is officially open. We don’t have any citizens in the country. I probably don’t need to live here to be Ambassador. I could appoint a consul, there are loads of qualified people, and it would be so much easier to switch before everything is set up.”  
  
“Nobo speaks four African languages and it would mean he isn’t around to antagonist you. It’s basically win win.”  
  
There were reasons, good reasons, for her to leave. Excellent reasons. Dozens of them. “None of which even touches on the food situation. Let’s not kid ourselves. I can’t cook. I will starve to death without either chef or a robust restaurant scene, neither of which exist here.”  
  
“A new place just opened down the block from us in Tokyo. They have amazing _nabe_. You love _nabe_.”  
  
Amy did love _nabe_ and she loved her home country. The hyper futuristic bustle of Tokyo. The more refined antique grace of Kyoto. The tranquillity of the mountains. She was homesick just think about it.  
  
If she stayed there would be no trip to Shiroshi to watch the leaves change with her Grandmother. No sliding open the wall panels on the main floor of the Fox Pavilion to feel the cool autumn air and listen to the rain. No New Year’s Day trip to Fushimi Inari or Toyokawa Inari shrine for a blessing. No sitting in the moon viewing pavilion to watch the first full moon of the year. No hot springs. No tea with Dai.  
  
There would just be Steve and Bucky falling more and more in love each day while she tried to fade into the background and keep Bucky as stable as she could manage. Randomly interspersed with minor instances of political manoeuvring as she played ambassador. And her heart on the verge of breaking the entire time.  
  
The silence lingered on the other end of the phone line as Dai waited for her next point. “You’re not coming home, are you?”  
  
Amy bit her lip hard to give herself an excuse for why her eyes were watering. She didn’t have emotions. Not like this. She was steel. Silk and steel. Things just slid off her. “I don’t see how I can leave right now.”  
  
Dai sighed and Amy could hear him leaning back in his desk chair. “So what brought on this phone call?”  
  
Amy sighed. What indeed. Brian said she was in love. And maybe she was, but it didn't really matter since Steve loved Bucky and Bucky loved Steve. And yet... “I slept through the night, last night. Six and a half hours.”  
  
“Maybe this isn’t as bad for you as I thought it would be.” Dai sounded so much more relaxed hearing that she was taking care of herself.  
  
Only she hadn’t slept through the night because she was taking care of herself. This was something else entirely. “I was in Steve and Bucky’s room.”  
  
“Oh, are you fucking kidding me?” There was a loud thud as something hit the far wall. A book judging by the way it hit the floor. That wasn’t a good sign. Dai didn’t throw things. Normally he left that to her.  
  
She had expected the lecture that followed his outburst. Although ‘serious head injury that had obviously rendered you incapable of identifying a threat’ wasn’t exactly the angle she thought he would take. It was good though. Very eloquent and we’ll reasoned. There was a flow to his arguments that was almost soothing. He wouldn’t be this upset if he didn’t love and want to protect her. And he was perfectly timing the thrown objects as punctuation. Seriously, when had he picked up that habit? It sounded like her aim was still better at least.  
  
“Are you even coming home when Kiki has the baby?”  
  
“For a little while at least.” Amy made the promise to herself as much as she promised Dai. The idea of the trip would give her an anchor to cling to for the next couple of months. Her real life was still out there. She could always go back to it if this was too much.  
  
Steve poked his head into the room. “Aims?”  
  
“ _I have to go Dai. I’ll call in a couple of days._ ” Amy switched to Japanese and turned partly away from the door. Her expression and sate of mind were too open right now. She didn’t need Steve to know she was having a crisis.  
  
“ _Love you_ Vixen.” Dai said reassuringly in the same language.  
  
“ _Love you_ Night Wind.” Warmth bloomed in Amy’s chest. Dai was mad, but he still loved her, and nothing was going to change that. She would be okay.  
  
“Dai?” Steve asked nodding at the phone. It was a terrible way to start any of conversations he wanted to have. But talking to Amy was high on the list of things he didn’t seem to know how to do lately.  
  
“Just checking in.” Amy waved the phone distractedly.  
  
Steve leaned against the wall as casually as he could. This was important. He and Bucky had both slept straight through the night. Something he’d only been doing sporadically since he had broken up with Amy, and something he didn’t think Bucky had done without chemical assistance for even longer. If Amy could pull that off on a regular basis it could make a huge difference. But he wouldn’t even suggest it if she’d had to spend all night sitting up draining her power into them. She looked reasonably rested, there were no big bags under her eyes at least, maybe she’d only had to get them under before she’d been able to go to her own bed. “What time did you leave last night?”  
  
“I… didn’t. I kind of…” Amy bit her lip. ‘I kind of fell asleep cuddled up with you and the man you’re in love with’ sounded ridiculous. And too much like she missed him. “…stayed. I fell asleep. I hope that’s alright.”  
  
That made Steve freeze. He hadn’t even considered the possibility that she had stayed. He didn't know why, she had always slept fine with him, for all she said she didn't sleep around people. If Amy could sleep, he didn’t have to feel guilty about wanting her there. And he did. He wanted Amy and Bucky both back in his bed more than he could say. “If… if you can sleep around both of us… maybe you can sleep in my, our, room again tonight?”  
  
Amy hugged her arms around herself. Too much like she missed him and too much like admitting she was in love with him herself. “Yeah. Maybe.”  
  
*****  
  
For the next week Bucky fell asleep with Amy’s head on his chest and Steve holding his hand.  
  
They slept, but none of them were peaceful sleepers. They woke up as a tangle of limbs. Half the time Steve would come to with Amy wrapped around him, the other half he was cradled under Bucky’s arm. Both were wonderful. His favourite was waking up with one on either side of him, Amy’s legs thrown across his, Bucky nuzzling at his neck, their hand clasped in the centre of his chest. It was a dream come to life. At least until they woke up.  
  
Amy always left in the morning. The second Steve or Bucky stirred she would be awake and out of bed. He had taken to pretending to still be deeply asleep, sometimes she would press a kiss into his cheek or run a hand through Bucky’s hair before she disappeared.  
  
Bucky didn’t feel the need to run away in the morning at least. Although his cuddling tended to take on a more fraternal attitude when he was conscious. Half the time he would sling an arm around Steve neck and pull him closer. They could spend hours talking in the morning. Steve was doing his best not to stare at Bucky’s lips during their talks. Bucky was recovering. He needed Steve to be his friend, not confuse him with his own emotional shit. As dependant as Bucky was on Steve, he might end up giving himself to Steve just to keep him happy. It was hard not to stare, not to think about kissing him when Bucky kept mauling him for hugs and smiling at him like he lit up the world. Maybe once Bucky was more stable, they could talk about it.  
  
Afternoons were rough. Bucky got tired easily. He was usually fine if he napped. But if he fought it, if he tired to stay vigilant, that was when he lost track. Sometimes it was just what day it was. Sometimes he couldn’t remember what language he was speaking. Sometimes, the worst times as far as Steve was concerned, he completely lost track of where he was and who they all were.  
  
When it was bad, a little bit of Amy’s power usually helped. She objected to controlling him more than was necessary though. Conceding to a douse of calm to help him sleep through the night and an occasional top up during the day.  
  
*****  
  
Sparing with the Dora might not have been the best plan Amy had ever come up with. Her shourlder was only _almost_ healed, and she had jarred it pretty badly during a last ditch parry. If Dai was here, he would have stopped her and reminded her that she needed to pace herself while she was recovering. She knew she occasionally ignored her physical well-being in favour of distracting herself. Not that it had worked. She was physically exhausted, but her mind was still racing.  
  
Bucky was bouncing back better than Amy could have expected. He had every right to be completely broken, but aside from a few mild dissociative episodes and nightmares most nights, he seemed to be doing reasonably well. A little clingy and touch starved. But he was spreading himself between Steve, Natasha, and Amy for that, so it wasn’t reaching a level that irritated her. Besides, Amy had been a little touch starved herself the last few months and the frequent cuddling was more welcome than she was willing let on.  
  
Unfortunately, all that cuddling wasn’t doing anything to help Steve remember that she wasn’t anything to him anymore. Amy caught him looking at her lips anytime they were alone together. And sometimes even when they weren’t, he kept doing it when she was helping Bucky get to sleep. Bucky seemed amused by the situation, which also wasn’t slowing Steve down the way she thought it should. He didn’t even seem embraced by the fact she kept catching him. It was more like he was waiting for her to make a move.  
  
Which was not going to happen. Amy didn’t give second chances. Let alone third. There were too many excellent reasons for her to keep her distance for her to forget and let him kiss her…again.  
  
Her family was one. Ambassadorship aside, her Grandmother had expectations for what she would do with her time now that she had turned her collar. Expectations that anyone she was with long term would be on the hook for too. She wasn’t about to drag anyone into that particular mess. Even the little time she had let herself have with Steve the last year had probably been a bad idea. Letting him meet her Grandmother definitely had been. Not that she'd really had a choice in the matter.  
  
Sweet cuddly Bucky was another. Amused as he was by Steve’s attempts to win her back. Long term she wasn’t the one either of them was going to want stealing their blankets. Regardless of how his eyes sparkled when she blushed.  
  
Amy hopped onto the counter in the kitchen and grabbed an orange out of the fruit bowl. Her blood sugar was dropping. Dai really would be telling her off for neglecting herself this week. Nutrients and hydration. That was what she needed right now. Then maybe a nice long shower, she wished she had more of her things here. Wearing something other than her gi, or the leggings and tee-shirts she had in mission bag for cool down, would also be very welcome. Soon hopefully. She and Dia had exchanged several emails on subject, and he had promised everything she and her ‘house guests’ needed was on the way.  
  
It would be easier to keep away from the boys once they all had properly outfitted bedrooms. Bucky wouldn’t be able to mover her futon into the room he and Steve were sharing the way he could with her sleeping bag.  
As if her thoughts had summoned him, Bucky appeared in the kitchen. Sliding along the edge of the counter, until he was positioned right by her knees. “How do I show him that I'm in love with him?”  
  
Amy sighed. Bucky had an amazing ability to find her when her defences were at their lowest. “If I knew how to answer that I don’t think the two of you would be living as fugitives right now.”  
  
He rested his head on her shoulder. A solid week of sleeping together and reaching for her when he felt off balanced had led to him craving physical contact with her even when she wasn’t helping him with nightmares or through an episode. She was safe, like Steve and Natasha, but he didn’t have any triggering memories of her. Little Fox was also amazingly soft, to touch, but also just with him in general, she never expected him to be anything other than himself. “I’m serious.”  
  
Amy offered him a segment of her orange. He was pretty bad about feeding himself too. “I really don’t know. Have you tried just telling him? Steve hates dancing around an issue.”  
  
“Why didn’t you tell him?” Bucky traced the seam on the side of Amy’s shirt absently. Everything she wore was so soft. Hydra had never let anything that soft near him. Just having his hand on her was grounding.  
  
Amy closed her eyes. She wasn’t going to lie to him. And he would only push harder if she tried to avoid the question. She was going to have to tell him the uncomfortable truth. “Because the last time I told someone I loved them they used it as leverage to turn me into their pet assassin.”  
  
“Who?” Bucky growled and tightened his hold protectively. The idea of someone using the little Fox the way they had used him. Of anything even close… It made his blood boil.  
  
Amy rubbed his arm reassuringly. She appreciated the sentiment, but she really could look after herself. “I took care of him.”  
  
Bucky made a mental note to ask Natasha about that later. If whoever it was wasn’t _taken care of_ to his satisfaction, he might just have to see what he and Steve could do about it. He was doing a lot better. He could handle a field trip. He could handle that one at least. Having a mission helped keep his mind focused. And he didn’t doubt for a moment that Steve would go with him.  
  
He pressed his face into Amy’s hair and took a handful deep steadying breaths. His little Fox was good at what she did. If she said the person who had hurt her was taken care of, he was probably taken care of to a degree that would satisfy him. He wasn’t here to interrogate her on her past anyway. He was thinking about his future today. A future Amy seemed very supportive of. He just hoped he’d read the situation right. Otherwise he was about to tip his hand to a dangerous degree. “What do you think would happen if I kissed Steve?”  
  
“I’m willing to bet he would kiss you back.” Amy shifted so she could look at him. Which had the added benefit of putting him back at arm’s length. The sensation of his arm around her and his hot breath on her neck were causing disconcerting flutters in her stomach, ones she couldn’t entirely write off as her body’s displeasure at her using her powers as much as she was. “Do you want to kiss him?”  
  
Bucky blushed and ducked his head. She was very direct about her questions. Worse, he really wanted to tell her the truth. “All the time. Always have.”  
  
“So, kiss him.” Amy smiled and offered him another piece of orange. The road to happily ever after really could be very straight forward.  
  
He inspected the segment carefully before taking it from her. Not because he didn’t trust the fruit, as much as to give himself time to consider her answer. She made it sound so simple. “What if I hurt him?”  
  
“The only way you would do that, is if you lose control again.” Amy pointed out grabbing another orange. She wasn’t about to eat less than she wanted to just because she was sharing, and it gave her something to do with her hands while other than crush the edge of the counter. “He has the best chance of restraining you and he will always forgive you.”  
  
“You really think so?” Bucky asked letting her pop another sweet juicy bite directly into his mouth.  
  
Amy gave him a disappointed look. All the evidence was right there in front of him. Steve couldn’t stay mad at Bucky if he tried. A blind man could see that and Bucky was not blind. “You shot him repeatedly, shoved him down an elevator shaft, nearly choked him out while dragging him off the roof in a helicopter crash, and he still went to the literal ends of the earth for you. If you want to kiss him, kiss him.”  
  
“I think I will.” It had been a long time since he had kissed anyone. Maybe the little Fox would help him practice.  
  
“Good.” Amy tossed the half orange into the air forcing him to catch it. Those eyes were very disconcerting.  
  
Bucky snatched the orange out of the air. Maybe she wouldn’t let him practice with her. At least not today. But she was thinking about it too.


	23. Moving Day

The call from T'Challa could not have come at a better time. Amy’s heart soared as she caught sight of the big blue shipping container waiting on the landing pad. The bright red circle of the rising Sun shone out of a crisp white rectangle on the side. She was getting terribly tired of wearing what she had in her go bags. Especially since she was sharing with Nat and Wanda. There were only so many times you could put back on the same clothes even if you did get to wash them in-between.  
  
“I believe these are yours” T'Challa grinned at her obvious excitement and swung half of the metal door open to reveal her prizes. Inside the container was stacked to the roof with boxes, crates, and carefully wrapped furniture.  
  
Amy let out a contented sigh. New clothes, an actual bed, a full selection of toiletries. Her day was looking much better.  
  
Steve was surprised to see that everyone had a trunk neatly labelled with their name. “That was a risk.”  
  
“Not really. Technically this is a diplomatic parcel. Anyone other than embassy staff opening it is breaking at least three international treaties.” Amy was only half paying attention to who she was talking to or what she was talking about. Somewhere in here was the box of ambassador gifts for the royal family. “Ahh here it is.” Amy pulled a smaller trunk out of one of the stacks. She passed it to T’Challa with a small bow. “Gifts for our hosts. Metallurgical samples for your sister, silk and pearls for your mother, and swords for you.”  
  
“Trying to soften me up before you open the one labelled armoury?” T'Challa asked inspecting the cat shaped metalwork of a sword hilt.  
  
Amy tipped her head, so she was looking at him through her lashes and winked. “Only if it’s working.”  
  
Steve stiffened. Was Amy flirting with the king? He thought they had moved passed the idea of a political marriage. And T'Challa was in love with Nakia. Why would Amy flirt with the king?  
  
T’Challa laughed. The Captain was obviously completely besotted with Ayame. Even if they were pretending that they were only friends. Equally obvious, his new ambassador was a flirt. “It is. And don’t tweak your Captain’s tail. He has had a hard week.”  
  
“He’s not my Captain.” Amy replied automatically.  
  
“Oh? Then why are you doing all this for him.” T'Challa smirked. These foreigners were going to be deeply amusing if nothing else.  
  
“I think I liked you better when you were moody.” Amy replied dryly, studiously not looking at Steve unloading furniture.  
  
T'Challa laughed and clapped her on the shoulder. “I will leave you to unpack. I have to go find Nakia and see how plans to address the UN are going. You must join us for dinner tomorrow now that you will all have something to wear. I will invite all of the chiefs so they can meet you.”  
  
“We’d love to.” Amy beamed at him. Fresh food cooked by someone else would be very welcome.  
  
“What was that about?” Steve asked as Amy climbed back into the container.  
  
“Nothing. Just T'Challa being in a good mood, we’re invited to dinner tomorrow night.” She grabbed one of the boxes labelled with her name and hefted it onto her left hip. From the size and shape it should be her bathroom supplies and makeup. She was going a little crazy not being able to re-dye her hair. She might have issues with the silver, but right now she would actively prefer it. Grey was definitely not her colour.  
  
Amy’s shoulder clenched, unable to bare the weight. He fingers slipped and the box tumbled from her grasp.  
  
Steve lunged in and grabbed the box with one hand. His other hand shooting out to stabilise her.  
  
He caught the flash of pain that crossed her face. He wasn’t about to forget that she was hurt. He smoothed his hand down her arm. She needed some to be gentle with her just now. “I’ll get these. Just tell me where you want them.”  
  
Amy sat down heavily on the trunk next to her. She might still be irritated with him. But she also knew her limitations. She shouldn’t be lifting things until she recovered, especially when she had already worn herself out today. “Thanks.”  
  
Steve looked at her sitting there. Shoulders slumped in defeat. The edge of her bandage poking out of her shirt's neckline. He wondered if he could get away with carrying her inside too.  
  
*****  
  
Steve didn’t end up asking Amy to let him carry her inside. Instead some gentle prompting convinced her to go inside and help direct where the boxes and furniture went. He roped Sam and Nat into helping with the actual lifting and carrying. Before long Amy was the calm centre of a flurry of activity. Steve re-positioned the couch four times before Amy was satisfied. The minimalist modern furniture reminded him of Amy’s apartment in Washington, although the overstuffed leather and oak armchair was straight out of the Fox pavilion in Katsura. He tried not to think of all the hours they had spent in it together.  
  
Bucky kept poking his head out and then retreating back into the bedroom. Steve smiled at him reassuringly when he emerged but didn’t push him to do more.  
  
The sound of so much movement coaxed Wanda out of her bedroom.  
  
“There you are.” Amy smiled and nudged a box with her toe. “I have a present for you.”  
  
Wanda edged closer until she could see the label on the box. “Clothes!”  
  
“Yes. I’m sorry my dear I’m not sure how well yours will fit. We had to borrow. Buying new would have aroused suspicion. Natasha and the Captain were easy, we had wardrobes for them already. I had some things on hand that should work for Sam and Barnes.” More accurately her brothers had some things and she didn’t think either of them actually knew what clothes they had in Japan, and if they did notice she could always make up some excuse about Fredrick thinking they were out of style, which was true. “Yuma did what she could, but you’re a slightly different size so you might have ended up with a bunch of leggings and shapeless pieces.”  
  
“As long as they are clean and mine, I don’t really care.” Wanda cried cracking the box open and diving in.  
  
Nat took a moment to appreciate Wanda’s simple enjoyment. Sometimes it was the little things that helped you get through the big things. Her smiled warmed even more as her _Otets_ slunk nervously into the suites main room, slowly creeping towards Amy and her eye of calm.  
  
Bucky set his chin on Amy’s shoulder. He like the chaos of today more than the silence while everyone had been gone. But it was still a lot. He wanted to bury his face in Steve’s chest and hide away from the word. He wasn’t sure how the rest of the suite’s occupants would feel about that though. You had to be careful about these things. Just look at all the trouble Fallsworth had gotten himself into. For now, he would settle for mauling the little Fox. She didn’t seem to mind, and he couldn’t see anyone having a problem with it as long as he didn’t peel her clothes off in public.  
  
He wrapped his arm around Amy and squeezed her a little closer. There were a lot of things he needed to figure out about their new lives. Like, why were all of Amy’s things going into a different room than his and Steve’s, and would she be okay with sharing Steve with him. Him with Steve? Either way. Figuring out their cover and or overall romantic situation could wait.  
  
Now was a time for little victories. Like how much better Steve’s youngest teammate seemed to be doing today. “She seems happy.”  
  
“Clean clothes will do that. Did you want some?” Amy reached back and massaged his scalp absently. He needed a shower. So did she, for that matter. There should be good soap in one of her boxes, and hair dye. That sounded heavenly.  
  
*****  
  
The shower had been magnificent. Locked in the bathroom with steam all around her Amy had been able to escape the hubbub of moving for at least a little while. The hubbub, _not_ Steve’s worried eyes or Bucky’s surprisingly flirtatious ones. When she came out, she was please to discover that Natasha had taken over unpacking the public spaces. She didn’t have to posture for Nat.  
  
“Have I mentioned how grateful I am that Shuri had a civilised bathroom installed?” Amy twisted her hair into a fluffy towel. Having Japanese style showers and a hot pool was surprisingly comforting. A good shower and soak and a fresh coat of hair dye. She felt infinitely more centered. “That girl is an angel.”  
  
Nat pulled her head out to the fridge to look at her friend. Unpacking the food Dai had sent and she had noticed something interesting. “You realise that you can’t live on fresh fruit and cliff bars, right?”  
  
Amy grinned and leaned against the counter. “Of course, I can’t, that’s why there should be a box of instant yakisoba in there too. It comes in multiple flavours now.”  
  
Natasha shook her head at Amy’s diet. “How did you survive this long?”  
  
Amy snagged one of the cliff bars. She did need to eat. “It is amazing what you can do when you have a full staff.”


	24. Steve Loves Bucky and Vice Versa

Amy knelt at her dressing table rubbing lotion into her hands and arms. She had her bedroom mostly set up, her favourite nightgown unpacked, a full-sized toothbrush and toothpaste in place of always inferior travel supplies from her gear. She fully intended to get back to her nighttime routine in an attempt to find some normality again. That meant taking the time to carefully brush out her hair and moisturise all over.  
  
She was trying not to preen too much at the feeling of the cool lotion sinking into her skin. She had gained an audience a few moments ago and it wouldn’t do to put on a show for him.  
  
Bucky fluffed his wet hair. He had expected Amy to be ready for bed before him. His married friends had always told him it took women longer to get ready for things than it took guys. Given that he and Steve had both showered in the time it took her to change, they may have been right. Strangely, it didn’t entirely look like she was getting ready to come to _their_ bed. He sat down next to her scuffing his stubble against her shoulder. She was especially soft tonight, and smelled like expensive flowers, jasmine, he thought.  
  
Amy reached back and rubbed his chin affectionately. She had expected at least one of them to check on her before they turned in for the night. In all likelihood Steve would have forgotten himself, knelt with his knees on either side of her, wrapped his arms around her waist and pressed his face into the middle of her back. Really Bucky was the better option.  
  
“Are you sleeping here tonight?” Bucky eyed the bed thing in the middle of the room. The mattress looked firm and the blankets were fluffy. But it didn’t look nearly as cosy as the big bed Steve had made up in his bedroom. He didn’t want his little Fox to be cold all night.  
  
Amy sighed and massaged a streak of lotion on her elbow. “You make it sound like it would be weird for me to sleep in my own room.”  
  
Bucky frowned. It was weird. Who would want to sleep alone when they could sleep with _Steve_? And not to toot his own horn, but he’d like to think he was a bit of a draw too. Especially freshly showered and sweet smelling like he was tonight. She’d seemed perfectly happy when the three of them were sprawled on blankets on the floor. “Is the bed not big enough? It seems huge to me, but then Steve and I take up a lot of space these days…”  
  
“I’ll be there in a second.” Amy sighed. Why was it so hard to say no to those soft grey eyes?  
  
Bucky looked at her again. She was definitely dressed for bed, in a pretty little night gown no less, dusty purple silk held together with tiny straps and lace panels. It was so short he was willing to bet if she bent over, he would be able to see her underwear. Which where sure to be matching lacy and purple things. There were definitely parts of this century he liked. “Is that what you normally wear to bed? It’s pretty.”  
  
Amy laughed and shoved him playfully. “Go get into bed you flirt.”  
  
“Do you not like flirting?” Bucky ran a finger under the thin strap of her nightgown. Her real clothes were even softer than the things she’d had with her gear. If she was going to be this touchable, he was going to end up spending all night stroking her side.  
  
“I love flirting. It is one of my favourite hobbies.” Amy lifted his hand away from her shoulder. “I don’t generally do it with people who are in relationships though.”  
  
“Mmm. I see.” Bucky closed his fingers around hers and kissed her knuckles softly. He wanted her in bed. Steve wanted her in bed. She wanted to be in bed. Flirting was a logical extension of that. Maybe what they were doing wasn’t typical, but none of the people involved were typical either. He would stop when it stopped making her eyes shine. “Exceptions are always confusing.”  
  
She had made an interesting point. One he was definitely going to think about while he waited for her. Was he in a relationship? He loved Steve. Steve apparently loved him. Did it count if they had never talked about it? They should talk about it. He should kiss Steve.  
  
*****  
  
Amy was missing when Steve woke up. She'd been curled on the far side of the bed, right on the edge of the mattress, when he had fallen asleep. But the woman who used to be such a late riser, was consistently waking up before him these days. He sighed and lay back against the pillows. At least Bucky was here. Here, and staring at him from his side of the bed. Very serious staring, like he was worried about something. “Buck?”  
  
“You love me.” Bucky said watching Steve’s face intently. Amy had said just tell him, but the risk still made his chest clench. If this went wrong, he could lose everything.  
  
“What?” Steve’s heart skipped a beat. Maybe he wasn’t as awake as he thought he was. But Bucky’s eyes weren’t usually so worried in his dreams. He wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. Bucky wasn’t supposed to know that Steve loved him. Not until he was recovered enough to make his own decisions on things. He couldn’t lie, wouldn't lie, Bucky deserved the truth. He'd hedge, that was all he could do at this point. “Of course, I love you Buck. You’re my best friend.”  
  
“No.” Bucky said evenly. He had expected Steve to try and spare his feelings, to try and protect him. He knew this wasn’t smart, or safe, or reasonable. But since when had real love even pretended to be those things. “You _love_ me. You want to kiss me and hold me and spend the rest of your life waking up next to me like this.”  
  
“Bucky. I….” Steve wasn’t sure why he was denying it. Bucky had figured it out without Steve pushing it on him. Everyone else knew. It wasn’t like it had to lead to anything other than Bucky knowing he was love. And how could knowing he was loved hurt? “Yeah Buck. I love you. I’m in love with you. Everything. I everything you.”  
  
“Good. I love you too.” Bucky sighed and rested his forehead against Steve’s. It would be complicated. But they had figured out how to hide from every investigative agency in the UN, they could figure it out. “And I’m tired of second guessing myself when I want to kiss you. We’re alone enough we can probably find time to steal at least a few kisses. And Aims seems like she’s okay with it. She’d probably even help cover for us.”  
  
“Oh.” Steve blinked. He hadn’t been expecting that. He should have remembered that Bucky hadn’t spent as much time in the new world as he had. “Oh no, that’s okay now. Or Sam and the girls would say it’s always been okay, and the rest of the world is finally figuring that out. You can kiss me whenever you want, we don’t have to hide. I guess what I’m trying to say is--“  
  
Bucky crushed his mouth against Steve’s. Caramel. His Stevie tasted like caramel and sunlight. It was even better that he had imagined. He wanted more. So much more. He curled his hand into Steve’s hair and pulled him even closer.  
  
Finally, breathing hard, Bucky let Steve fall back against the pillows. “You talk to much.”  
  
When Bucky started kissing him again Steve had to agree. Talking was not a good use of their time. Why had they been wasting so much time?  
  
They had to pause to breath several more times before either of them was willing to stop.  
  
Bucky nuzzled Steve’s ear. He was allowed to kiss Steve. He was allowed to kiss Steve whenever he wanted to. There were going to be a lot of kisses in their future, but right now he was going to set a new precedent for how they were going to start their morning from now on. “Hey Steve?”  
  
“Yeah Buck?” Steve was still a little overwhelmed. He had kissed Bucky. Bucky had kissed him. Bucky loved him. He was pretty sure he was going to get to kiss Bucky again.  
  
Bucky grinned and kissed Steve again. Just a short kiss this time. “I want coffee.”  
  
Steve laughed ran his thumb along Bucky’s jaw. Bucky loved him. Bucky wanted to kiss him. Bucky had kissed him. Now Bucky wanted coffee. Steve would go out and grow coffee if he needed to. “We can do that.”  
  
*****  
  
Natasha raised an eyebrow as Amy emerged from Steve’s bedroom.  
  
Amy flinched. She had managed to avoid her friend's judgement so far by slipping out before anyone else woke up. Everything was too complicated. She didn’t want to explain it before she had it figured out in her own mind. “I don’t want to talk about it.”  
  
Nat ignored her. They were talking about this. “You’re sleeping with Steve?”  
  
“No.” Amy said emphatically. Natasha’s eyebrows rose even higher. “Okay, yes, but it’s not like that.”  
  
“Then what is it like?” Natasha stirred her tea as she watched Amy. “Because Steve and Bucky are defiantly something. I won’t stand for you breaking my _Otets_ heart any more than I will stand for either of them breaking yours.”  
  
“I note Steve isn’t under your protection.” Amy reached across Nat for the tea pot and filled a mug for herself.  
  
“Are you or Bucky going to break his heart?” Natasha asked over the rim of her mug.  
  
Amy sighed swirled her tea. “I don’t want to break either of their hearts. I am sleeping with them-- literally sleeping, you can keep that knowing look to yourself thank you, because it makes it easier to use my powers to help Bucky. I’m not going to do anything more than sleep with either of them.”  
  
“Because you don’t find them at all attractive.” Natasha didn’t believe her for a second. Amy like sex. It was why so many agencies wrote her off, instead of treating her as the threat she was. She couldn’t keep her hands to herself. Especially around Steve. How many times had they had sex before they had gotten back together?  
  
Amy took a sip of her tea. It was still too hot. “Because I keep messing things up when I let sex slip in. I swore off men when Steve broke up with me the second time and I have done a good job of sticking to it so far.”  
  
“Four and a half months. Wow. That is a long dry streak.” Natasha snorted.  
  
Amy glared at her. These things were relative. “It’s the longest I’ve gone since I was 15.”  
  
They stood together in silence for a few minutes. Stirring their tea and watching the city come to life outside the windows.  
  
Finally, Natasha sighed and tossed the last of her cooling tea down her throat. “Be careful _Kisune_. There’s a lot on the line if you get this wrong.”  
  
“I know.” Amy whispered. Steve and Bucky emerged from the bedroom. Smiling. Happy. Perfect for each other. “I know.”  
  
Nat’s eyes went even wider. Steve was holding Bucky’s hand. Bucky was grinning ear to ear. Steve was blushing slightly. They both looked so… _happy_.  
  
“Steve loves me.” Bucky announced beaming at the girls.  
  
“Oh good, he finally worked up the courage to tell you.” Natasha said refilling her tea. Her work out could wait, she had evidently wandered onto the set of one of her soap operas.  
  
“I told him.” Bucky kissed Steve’s shoulder. Steve loved him. He loved Steve. And they didn’t have to hide.  
  
Amy shared a quick look with Nat, picking up her own cup of tea. This was exactly why she couldn’t risk messing things up for them. They were too good together. Too pure. “Well he is a bit of an idiot when it comes to this sort of thing.”  
  
“He is also standing right here. You know where he can hear every word your saying.” Steve watched Amy’s face. Was she hurt? Was she excited for them? Her face was as serine as it had been since she met them in Siberia. There were no cracks in her mask to give away her inner thoughts this time.  
  
“I know.” Amy patted his cheek as she slid by him on the way to her room. She needed to go for a run. A long one.


	25. Baggage Needs Unpacking

Steve stopped in the door to the room Amy had claimed. Damp strands of her hair clung to her face, newly inky black. The stark ebony colour only emphasised how pale she was by comparison. His eyes fixed on her shoulder. Had someone helped her change the bandage on it after her shower? Or had she struggled to put one on by herself again? From the way her shirt draped close to her body it almost looked like she'd taken it off all together.  
  
It had to be too soon for that. Assuming she had gotten hurt in the UN explosion, it had been a little more than a week. Maybe it had healed enough that she felt more comfortable without the bandage. His Amy didn’t like the feeling of tape pulling at her skin.  
  
He should ask.  
  
No. She would accuse him of worrying about her to stop himself from worrying about Bucky. Which he was. But that didn’t mean she hadn't earned some worry all her own.  
  
A subtly raised eyebrow broke into his mental debate. Amy had stopped what she was doing and was watching him watch her. How long had he been standing here staring without saying anything? Too long.  
  
He had come here for a reason, not to check that she wasn’t about to collapse… not _just_ to check that she wasn’t about to collapse. He held out a silk bundle he had brought with him. “I think this is yours.”  
  
Amy recognised what the bundle was immediately. A crested kimono Jacket. A black jacket with _her_ crest on it. A white iris inside a white circle. The same image Fredrick had adopted in red as his logo. It was too big to be one of hers. It was the one she had ordered for him. It was supposed to be a birthday present. A little something to claim him as her own. She probably should have gotten rid of it once it was obvious they weren’t getting back together.  
  
Amy sighed. Too late now. “No. It was supposed to be for you. I’m not sure why it got packed. You can… Just toss it if you don’t want it….”  
  
Dai must have let Fredrick help with packing. There was no way her cousin would have packed the jacket for Steve, he was still far too angry at the super soldier. His hopeless romantic of a boyfriend on the other hand would think the idea of Steve being marked as hers was delightfully melodramatic. Star crossed lovers, so close to being happy… So close. He wasn’t hers anymore though. It would be better if he got rid of it. It would be easier on her than seeing him in it.  
  
Steve traced the white flower on the sleeve. For him. Regardless of who had packed it there was only one person who could have had it made. Amy had wanted him to be visibly hers, even if only a few people would recognise the signs. Amy loved him and wanted the people who understood her to know that she loved him. “The…. The fabric… is really nice. I wouldn’t mind keeping it.”  
  
“Then do that.” Amy folded the camisole she was holding and studiously avoiding looking at the pile of tee-shirts and sweaters still in the box next to her, another surprise courtesy of Freddy. She didn’t need to give Steve's knowing look any more ammunition by drawing his attention to them.  
  
They had all been his at one point. she had stolen them, or he had insisted she keep them, either way they had never migrated from her drawer back to his. She could return them now. Claim that they had gotten miss packed. But they were all older, almost worn out, Steve was irrationally hard on his clothes, Amy knew that nothing else that had been packed for Steve would be in the same condition. Most of it would be brand new or worn once or twice at most. He would notice the inconsistency. He might even figure out that these items weren’t things she had purchased for him or he had left in Japan deliberately, they were things he had loaned her, and she had kept. She couldn’t give them back without him asking questions about why she still had them at all… also she didn’t want to.  
  
She really should work on letting him go. Maybe tomorrow. Would it be easier or easier to give him up once Bucky started kissing him?  
  
“I’ll… I’ll let you finish unpacking…” Steve hesitated. He wanted to wrap himself around those stiff shoulders, kiss her neck until her felt her relax into him. Apologise and have things magically go back to the way they had been. At very least he wanted to know that she wasn’t going anywhere. “This plan is going to work. We can get through this… together. We can do anything.”  
  
Amy closed her eyes, taking a deep centring breath. “Yeah. We can do this.”  
  
*****  
  
“Hey Aims. I think some of your things got mixed in with mine.” Nat leaned on the door to Amy’s room with a bundle of swords tucked under her arm.  
  
“Yeah there is some of that going around.” She muttered reaching for the bundled. Amy checked the tang of the longer sword. Etched into the metal was a set of kanji identifying not just the maker but the owner of the swords. It was something Amy’s grandmother insisted on, with eight or more foxes active at any one time it reduced confusion. “No arctic fox. These are yours.” She snapped the blade back into its sheath.  
  
Natasha looked at long sword in Amy’s and the short one she still held. Light glinted off the silver chased fittings. “You got me swords?”  
  
“My Grandmother got you swords.” Amy corrected passing the swords back to Natasha. “You are a Fox and deserve everything that implies. I got a note by the way, she wants to see you. The next time I go home I’m supposed to take you with me. Auntie Sakura thinks she wants to turn your collar.”  
  
Natasha considered the implications. Amy had changed since she had turned her collar. Gotten stronger, faster, her powers had grown, she knew things she shouldn’t know. “Can she do that?”  
  
Amy shrugged. Who knew exactly what her grandmother could and couldn’t do. If great grandmother was in on the plans, odds were even better that they could make something work. “She’ll do what she does. And at the end you’ll be a Fox with full standing.”  
  
Nat nodded. That was exactly the kind of non answer she expected from a Fox. “I think I’d look good with white hair.”  
  
*****  
  
Sam knocked on Amy’s door softly. She was late for dinner, but she was also kneeling at the little shrine in the corner. A stick of incense burning in front of her. He didn’t want to intrude if she was praying. She and Steve had been on eggshells around each other since the rescue. Maybe a little spiritual guidance would help with that. “Change your mind about dinner? I wouldn’t blame you.”  
  
Amy squeezed her eyes shut tighter. She still had no idea what she was doing. Meditating hadn’t helped. “No. Just lost track of time. I'll be right there.”  
  
“Nat made pasta.” Sam hesitated in the door. She was one of Brian’s best friends, and she had done so much for them these past few days. He should say something.  
  
"Thanks for all this. It can't be easy watching..." Sam cleared his throat. She hadn't addressed the elephant in the room, and neither had Steve. He really didn't want to be the first on to say it out loud. "Well I can't be easy. If you need someone to talk to..."  
  
"Thanks, Sam." Amy smiled at him. Hiding in her room wasn’t fooling anyone. She needed to put on her best geisha face and act like everything was perfect. “I’ll be right out.”  
  
*****  
  
The living room and dining room were only half unpacked. Crates still cluttered the space. Boxes of books stacked in front of partly assembled bookshelves. Bits and pieces scattered around. Amy settled herself between Wanda and Natasha with her bowl full of bright green pesto covered pasta. She tried to focus her mind on what was left to do. There were more linens to unpack for the bathroom and for bedrooms. Her armoury was still in boxes. The weapons racks broken down. They would need putting together. Anything to stop herself watching Steve and Bucky make eyes at each other without realising what they were doing.  
  
A foot brushed hers under the table. She looked up. Bucky was grinning right at her.  
  
“Do we get to find out what is in the box called 'at least act like a civilised adult'?” Bucky asked slurping down a long noodle. Something had Amy all worked up. She needed a distraction. That kind of label meant whatever was inside was interesting.  
  
Amy stabbed at her food. It was a box she didn’t want to deal with, it’s contents would also be a litmus test for how mad the most important person in her life felt right now. “That will be my art. Probably some other decorative pieces. I couldn’t tell you what art exactly. Dai is pretty pissed at me, so probably not my favourite pieces.”  
  
Nat set her fork down. “Oh god. He's pissed at Steve too. It’s going to be all postmodernist and serialism. You two fighting has doomed us to rooms full of Breton for the foreseeable future.”  
  
“He doesn’t hate me that much….” Her last phone call with Dai flashed through her head. “We can always hang my kimono in place of art if it comes to that.”  
  
“Let’s see. It might not be that bad.” Steve scooped the last of his pasta into his mouth and shoved away from the table.  
  
“You collect a lot of art, baby girl?” Bucky winked at her and turned so he could watch Steve work. Someone knew exactly what Steve looked like in a slightly too tight shirt. He was going to have to find a way to send that person flowers.  
  
“It’s what comfortably well-off people do.” Amy crossed her ankles delicately under her chair. Steve opening a crate without a crowbar was exactly the sort of thing that made most women swoon. She was not most women. Therefor she was not about to swoon. She was going to email Fredrick and remind him what size tee-shirt Steve wore.  
  
Bucky shot another amused look at the little Fox. Her subtlety was almost as attractive as the way Steve’s arms looked right now. “Something tells me you are slightly more than comfortably well off.”  
  
“You’d think that, but after expenses I barley break even. Private jets are not cheep.” Amy tossed her head imperiously. Rich girl with no idea how the real world worked was a familiar mask. “I can’t even buy more than three Birkin bags a year.”  
  
Her slightly overblow caricature made everyone break down laughing. That might just be the tension of last week and a half. But they needed some release.  
  
Steve’s laugh cut off when he pulled the first painting out of the box. His portrait of Amy. Had her eyes looked that hurt when he gave it to her? He thought he had captured her cool mischievous glint. This girl looked so fragile. Silk over cracked porcelain not steel. He cleared his throat. “Portrait of the ambassador. I think it would look good over the desk.”  
  
Everyone else joined Steve’s unpacking as they finished their food. There were no other major upsets among the art. Nothing else painted by Steve. It was mostly landscapes. There was a beautiful scroll of calligraphy that Steve thought might be in Amy’s own work. Some prints from Fredrick’s Vogue feature last year, with Amy looking ethereal and fierce. A few candid photos of Amy, her family and friends.  
  
It took Steve a moment to figure out why Sam was so drawn to the one particular photo, Amy, Ken, and someone else standing in front of a Humvee in a desert somewhere. He knew why it made his chest flutter. How did she look so good in fatigues and a tee-shirt? The shirt made Steve’s heart flip again, his shield was splashed across the chest. Then the third face in the photo clicked in his mind. That was Brian, standing on Amy’s other side with an arm around her waist. Between the accords and the breakout, Sam was probably worried sick about what was going to happen to Brain. “He’ll be alright.”  
  
Sam weighed the framed photo in his hands. It felt heavier than it should. “I was supposed to spend that night with him. He was so broken up over it all. I said I’d go over after the wake and instead… I can’t be there for him at all now.”  
  
Amy pulled her knees up to her chest watching them. “He loves you. He understands why you did what you did.”  
  
Sam looked at her. She had talked to Brian. How had he not even thought to ask if she had talked to Brian? “Is he in trouble because of the Accords?”  
  
Amy shook her head with a smile. “Bri’s day job is government sanctioned and most of his extracurriculars don’t happen on what you would call earth.”  
Sam closed his eyes and said a silent prayer of thanks. "Good. That's good."  
  
"If you are very good, I'll see of T'Challa will let him come visit. Maybe for my birthday." Amy rested her cheek against her knees. Maybe more love would help keep her from getting jealous of Steve and Bucky's happiness. She'd never had a problem with other people's love before. At very least, Bri would distract her. There weren't a lot of swordsmen out there who could last any length of time against her, Brian was one.  



	26. Dinner With the Ambassador

Dark rusty rose silk swirled around Amy’s legs. The pearly crepe so light it fluttered in the slightest breeze. Thin straps held up the blousy bodice, crossing between her shoulder blades. The back dipped low and the skirt hugged her hips before flaring out from mid-thigh where the high slit also started. Tiny pink pearl buttons ran down the front of the dress from the neckline to the top of the slit.  
  
“Is that what you’re wearing?” Steve couldn’t tear his eyes away from her. She was beautiful. She was always beautiful. Did she have to be this beautiful when they were going to dinner with the king she had proposed to and all the important chiefs in the country? The dress had no back, and did the slit need to go that far up?  
  
“What’s wrong with what I’m wearing?” Amy asked securing a pair of petal shaped pearl and diamond earrings. Their delicate pink matched her lipstick and complimented her dress perfectly. She thought she had chosen a simple and elegant outfit. Did she have a stain? Or maybe he thought she should be wearing Wakandin colours? She had a black dress she could change into. She had thought the pink felt more casual though. She didn’t want to overdo it. This wasn’t an official State dinner after all. Or maybe it was the half-healed scar under her shoulder blade. It was shiny new skin now. Pretty much everyone they had met so far were warriors of some description. One reasonably small clean scar shouldn’t be scandalous or revolting.  
  
“Nothing. You look amazing.” Bucky said following Steve into the main room. What was wrong with Steve that he couldn’t go five minutes without antagonising the girl? If he kept this up, he would push Amy even further away. And then she might leave. Had it always been this much work to save Steve from himself? Or had it been easier when he could pick him up and physically carry him away when he was being self-destructive?  
  
He stepped between Amy and Steve. Steve needed to take a breath and get himself under control. He could distract Amy while he did that. “Help me with this damn tie?”  
  
Amy fingered the silk thoughtfully. For some reason he had picked a rose-coloured tie and a dove gray shirt that would look great with both her pink and Steve’s navy. She closed her fist around the strip of fabric and pulled it away from his neck. The tie landed in a corner. Amy popped open his top two buttons and gently spread his collar for a more casual look. A look that also happened to match Steve better than it matched her. “You don’t need a tie. We aren’t being that formal.”  
  
Bucky looked at her sceptically. That didn’t sound entirely true. “You’re in a floor length gown.”  
  
Amy straightened her shoulders. She had to remember that this man was one of the best operatives of the century. For all his main activities these days were cuddling and staring worriedly at Steve’s back. She had to be careful or he would see through her mask. “It is a very casual gown. Fashion has changed a lot. Want me to do your sleeve?”  
  
“Please?” Bucky relented, turning his shoulder towards her. He preferred to let Amy or Natasha help him pin up the empty flap of fabric. They were both practical and efficient about it. Steve always looked like he was about to apologise for not saving Bucky sooner. As if he hadn’t made his choices knowing he was probably going to be seriously injured or killed. What Bucky really wanted were clothes he didn’t need help with at all. He didn’t think he could get away with wearing sleeveless undershirts all the time though.  
  
“Looking good, _Otets_.” Natasha said wafting into the room and draping herself over Amy’s shoulder as she worked to pin Bucky’s sleeve. He did look good. More fragile than the man who had raised her, but happier too. At least something good had come of the mess the accords had caused.  
  
“I could say the same, _Ryzhiy_.” Bucky kissed her cheek and made her twirl for him. Her Burnt orange wrap dress flowing behind her the way only silk could. Ornamented with a wide black sash and classical figures embroidered around the edges. She looked like a Greek urn come to life in the best way possible. An impression complimented by the lion shaped gold jewellery she had chosen. His little girl was all grown up and looking happier than he had ever seen her. If he could get Steve to relax into their new life the way she had everything would be great.  
  
Wanda followed more sedately. Her dress was far less dramatic than the other women’s. A washed-out red linen with black flowers embroidered over the bodice and around the hem.  
  
“Was there a colour memo I didn’t get?” Sam asked rolling his light blue dress shirts sleeves to the elbow.  
  
Steve bristled slightly. Didn’t any of them notice that Amy was only half dressed? One stiff breeze and everyone would be able to see…. Steve cut off his train of thought. Amy was free to make her own decisions on what she wore. She always had. Nothing had changed. Not really. Just because she wasn’t thinking about him when she picked her clothes these days didn’t really change anything. At least it wasn’t see through.  
  
“We’re going to be late.” Steve grumbled his shoulder bumping against Amy’s on the way to the door.  
  
*****  
  
They arrived at the grand dining room slightly early. Shuri met them at the door with a wave of youthful enthusiasm, she even coaxed a fist bump out of a bemused Bucky.  
  
Natasha rubbed his back. “What’s wrong _Otets_.”  
  
“ _She’s not scared of me_.” Bucky whispered in Russian.  
  
Natasha tipped her head curiously. “ _Should she be?_ ”  
  
Bucky frowned. None of them seemed to really understand what a threat he was. “ _You all should_.”  
  
Natasha chuckled and smoothed his shirt over his shoulders. “ _I’ve always been terrible at doing what I’m supposed to. And you know Steve is worse._ ”  
  
“How much would it blow your minds if I spoke Russian?” Shuri asked rocking back on her heels.  
  
“Not all that much.” Amy smothered a smile at Bucky and Natasha’s banter. Steve _was_ worse than Natasha. “It would be a good language to learn if we are going to be staying with you.”  
  
“Which reminds me.” Shuri presented them with metallic grey bracelets. “You'll need these if _you’re_ going to be staying with _us_.”  
  
“Thank you, princess.” Bucky slipping the beads onto his wrist, a few of them glowing to life briefly before fading back to sleep. “We are staying, right? I think I like it here.”  
  
“It is so weird having you awake. I liked talking to you when you were frozen. You were great to bounce ideas off.” Shuri grinned and started towards the door.  
  
Bucky smiled shyly. She wasn’t afraid of him at all. She had seen him completely lose control, and she still wasn’t scared. “I can still do that for you, I can make interested and impressed noises too. I wouldn’t mind learning more about your process. Everything I’ve seen so far is amazing. I especially like your plane-car things. They are much better than the one Stark made back in our day.”  
  
Shiri whipped back around to face him. “You saw the Stark flying car? How did it work? We use vibranium's repulsion properties to make things hoover. He would have had to use electromagnets or some kind of palladium-based force field.”  
  
“Oh my god. She’s a tiny Stark.” Nat muttered to Amy.  
  
Amy rolled the beads between her fingers. There was no obvious connection, each individual bead rolled freely in any direction, it looked like you could even remove them if you needed to. But the bracelet held its shape as a single ring of beads. They wouldn’t even change places is you squeezed them in your hand. “She might be smarter than Stark. I have no idea how these things work.”  
  
The Queen Mother ushered them into the dining room and started the formal introductions. There was no sign of T'Challa, but then Amy hadn’t expected him to be. In her experience royalty didn’t show up until they absolutely had to. She smiled, bowed, shook hands, and did her best to memorise names, faces, and the tidbits of personal information the Queen Mother doled out.  
  
Introductions dragged on. The time dinner was supposed to be served ticking closer and then passing them by.  
  
The queen mother clapped her hands. “I have no idea where my son is. But it is unfair to make you wait.”  
  
No one seemed particularly put out as they settled around the long table. Amy assumed that court manners were relaxed at this sort of informal evening. She was also gratified to discover that the Wakandins didn’t insist on the silly western custom of alternating sexes along the table. She claimed a spot between Natasha and Shuri. Sitting as far from Steve as she could while staying with her party. Shuri proved to be an enjoyable conversationalist. Bouncing from one topic to the next with a light untroubled air.  
  
There was a stir as the Dora swung the grand doors open.  
  
T'Challa strode in. Looking handsome and regal, a black and orange sarong tied at one shoulder and a necklace of stylised silver panther claws resting across his chest. He waved for them all to stay seated and moved to greet his mother first.  
  
She tipped her head so he could kiss her cheek and patted his arm warmly. “You are late. Your sister has been talking the ears off our guests.”  
  
“My apologies.” He kissed the offered cheek and moved on to bother his sister before he took his seat at the head of the table.  
  
The conversation picked up again as soon as T’Challa sat down. Steve was having a hard time focusing on what the girls were saying. Something about tensile strength and compensating for compression. Bucky had gone stiff next to him. Steve looked over at him. His eyes were fixed unblinkingly on the King. “You’re staring Buck.”  
  
“What is he wearing?” Bucky muttered back. It was loose and flowing. And _it didn’t have buttons_. Or sleeves or any of the fiddly bits that had been driving him crazy the last few days.  
  
“It’s a sarong.” Ta’challa said, noticing the eddy in the flow of conversation. He didn’t want to regret offering these people sanctuary, but after the incident in his sister’s lab it was hard not to be at least a little on edge.  
  
“It looks so comfortable.” Bucky tipped his head to one side. He wanted one. “Do you think I could put one on one handed?”  
  
Natasha turned her attention to the boys’ conversation. She knew Bucky was deeply frustrated by how hard it was to put on some of the clothes Amy had brought for him on his own. She had heard the yelling in the morning. And the argument with Steve to let him do things on his own. “Probably. It might take practice to get it to fall right.”  
  
Bucky laughed. “Not like I don’t got the fucking time.”  
  
“Language.” Steve chided in exasperation. They were eating with royalty, if there was a time for best behaviour this was it.  
  
A tiny snort of a laugh escaped Amy. Bucky glanced at her. She was focusing intently on her plate the smallest smile curling her lips. Next to her Natasha smirked evilly at Steve. A grin spread across Bucky’s face. The girls _knew_ and from the looks of it, Steve would be hearing about it later. Bucky couldn’t wait. They could all tease Steve, it would be fun. Maybe he could get Amy to sit in his lap while they did. That would be really fun. He could tease Steve in two ways then. And figure out of there really was a knife causing the little wrinkle in the back of her dress, and if it was as big a knife as he thought it might be.  
  
*****  
  
The party milled around after dinner, breaking into smaller conversations. Steve stayed with Bucky as he talked with T’Challa and Shuri about sarongs and other simple drapey garments. He couldn’t help stealing occasional glances at Amy as she made her own rounds.  
  
Amy was grateful for the geisha training her aunts had drilled into her. It wasn’t a huge party, but the stakes were high. She moved gracefully around the space, introducing herself to every chief and their entourage. Most of them were reasonably pleased to see her. The kingdom had been slowly working towards being more open. Despite the complications surrounding her, Amy felt confident that she was putting herself forward as another gentle step in that direction.  
  
“Ambassador.” M’baku called as she drifted by his entourage and their spot at the table. So far he was impressed by this foreigner his king had opened their kingdom to, but he wanted to form a more personal impression. “What do you think of our country so far.”  
  
Amy settled gracefully into the chair facing him. If there was anyone she needed to impress tonight, it was the chief of the Jabari. “An isolated country with highly developed technology and a strong foundation of tradition? Feels like home. The view of the sunset from the palace is amazing. I will confess I always preferred a sunrise though.”  
  
M’baku laughed. A promising start. “There is nothing like watching the sun rise over the eastern mountains. From my throne room you can see clear across the kingdom. When the sun gilds the glaciers. Ahh it is pure heaven.”  
  
“I’d love to see it some day.” Amy crossed her ankles under her chair and leaned forward, using her eyes to express her sincerity.  
  
M’baku considered. If he really wanted to read this woman, he needed to get her out of her comfort zone. “You must. You and your friends. We have a planting festival every year. You will come as my guests and we will feast. You'll have to work for it though. Either in the field to help bring in the harvest or by providing entertainment.”  
  
“Oh, I’m sure we can work something out.” Amy smiled. Oh, this man. He might as well bribe her to get her to spill her secrets. A festival with entertainment was the perfect enticement for her. She could dance. Steve and Bucky would have fun working in the field. And she and Natasha could _dance_. How long had it been since she performed? Too long. She would have to do something impressive. Maybe the story of Princess Hase.  
  
Steve watched Amy lean closer to M’baku. Her eyes were glittering. Whatever they were talking about she was enjoying the conversation. Did she have to touch his arm like that?  
  
Steve stood up abruptly. He couldn’t watch this anymore. “Amy. Bucky and I are going to bed.”  
  
Amy flicked her eyes towards him. He looked tense. Bucky must be getting overwhelmed with the night and the tension was spilling over to Steve. It would be better if they turned in. “I'll be up in a few minutes.”  
  
“Now Amy.” Steve growled.  
  
Amy sat back in her chair. Eyes flashing. Had he just ordered her? “Excuse me?”  
  
Steve set his jaw. She was too stubborn for her own good. “I said we’re leaving now.”  
  
“And I said I'll be up in a few minutes.” Ice flooded Amy’s voice. He had. He thought he could order her around. No one ordered her around. Especially not a man.  
  
“Amy!” Steve almost shouted in frustration. He just wanted her to come upstairs with them and stay out of trouble. Was that so much to ask?  
  
Amy pursed her lips. She was ambassador here. She couldn’t afford the loss of face from a public fight. Whatever had gotten into Steve it would be better to deal with it in private. Stone faced she turned back to her conversational companion. “Forgive me lord M’baku. I’m afraid my companions are distressed at the idea of leaving me alone outside of our suite. An unnecessary fear, as I am more than capable of looking after myself. But they have had a hard couple of weeks, and I don’t wish to be the cause of further distress. May I write to you to formalise our plans? Or perhaps just to set another informal meeting?”  
  
“Of course, Ambassador. Which ever works better for you. Any of the palace messengers will be able to reach me.” M’baku said graciously. He offered her a hand which she shook professionally before bobbing a perfunctory curtsy.  
  
“Thank you, my lord. It was an honour to meet you.”  
  
Amy swept out of the dinning room ahead of Steve. She wouldn’t suffer the indignity of walking behind someone who had publicly told her off. She was a goddess and deserved to be treated as such.  
  
*****  
  
Amy stormed into the suite’s kitchen. She needed to break something. It was either going to be the plates or Steve’s face. And there was already too much public dissent in their party. She wouldn’t leave visible marks.  
  
The first plate landed the sink with a satisfying crash.  
  
“Something you want to say?” Steve said, following close behind her. He wanted an explanation. What had that dismissal been? Why on earth had she been so buddy buddy with the chief anyway? She could have ended her conversation when he had said they were going to bed the first time.  
  
“How dare you talk to me like that.” Amy punctuated her sentence with another smashed plate.  
  
Steve reeled. _She_ was mad? What did Amy have to be mad about? “What was I supposed to do? With you sitting there _flirting_ like that.”  
  
Amy rounded on him. Flirting? That was his problem? He thought she was _flirting?_ “First of all, I wasn’t flirting. And second, you have no right to be hurt if I was.”  
  
Steve was not about to back away from someone half his size just because she was scowling at him. Amy was the one who started this. “Don’t I? If I don’t get to have an opinion on you flirting who does?”  
  
“No one. I’m not--“ Amy vision flashed red. The plate she was holding snapped in her hand. She dropped it into the sink. Squeezing her fist around the trickle of blood that welled in her palm. “Everything. _Everything_ I have done in the last few weeks has been for you. Do you know how much of a claim that gives you over me? None. We are not a couple anymore, Steve. If I decide I want to climb M’baku like a fucking tree, you don’t get to say a _thing_. If decide I want to sleep my way through the Wardogs, _you don’t get to say a thing_. You don’t get to act like a little boy who is surprised when someone else wants to play with the toy you put down. I am my own person. Not your fucking plaything.”  
  
Bucky eased his way into the kitchen. He didn’t like seeing the two of them fight. It was obvious that they were both hitting each other’s weak spots even if they didn’t realise that was what they were aiming at. “If I say the noise is making me anxious will you two stop fighting?”  
  
“Don’t worry. We're done. You can take your idiot to bed now.” Amy grabbed a tea towel to roughly bandage her hand and headed for her room. Thank the gods Wakanda had such claimable architecture. She needed to be on a roof, with a knife, as soon as possible. Was there anyone as infuriating as Steve Rogers?  
  
Bucky watched her go. She was pissed. And she was _hot_. Another beautiful person filled with a righteous furry. No one could accuse him of not having a type. He sighed and turned back to Steve as her skirt whipped out of site. “She’s right you know. You shouldn’t talk to her like that.”  
  
“But she’s….” Steve deflated without Amy's presence antagonising him. Amy was her own person. She didn’t owe him anything. “Yeah. Yeah I know Buck.”  
  
Bucky sighed. “I’m going to shower and get into bed. You can join me after you apologise. Amy deserves better than a jealous prick.”  
  
Steve rubbed the back of his neck. “How mad do you think she is?”  
  
Bucky grew quiet. Long second passed while he thought. “Do you remember that time the Conner brothers beat me up because I wasn’t good enough for their sister?”  
  
Steve rolled his eyes and leaned against the counter. “She’s not going to sick her brothers on me Buck.”  
  
“Amy has brothers?” Bucky did a rapid double take. He hadn’t even considered the little Fox might have family beyond what they had met in Mongolia. How was she going to explain her new life to them? He knew he would be anything but okay with Rebecca running off to live with outlaws. He shook his head, that was a different problem. “No, I don’t think she is going to sick her brothers on you. She can fuck you up all by herself. I just remembered the other thing and I wanted to make sure it had really happened.”  
  
“Yeah. Yeah that happened. Probably the only time I was the one to drag you out of a fight. You insisted you had them on the ropes. You didn’t. I took you to that coffee place you liked on Union and Massie Donaldson patched you up. I think you went home with a date and by the next weekend the Conner brothers were your best friends again because their sister had started seeing some banker they thought was stuck up.”  
  
“Hu. I don’t remember Massie. I do remember you.” Bucky pecked Steve on the lips again. He wasn’t about to let his boy drive the little Fox away. They needed her. “Go talk to Amy. _Apologise_. Make her think you might actually like, respect, and want to spend time around her as a person and not just a pair of admittedly spectacular legs.”


	27. Steve Is Not Good At Apologising

It didn't take long to find Amy. Even with stopping to give himself a pep-talk in the hall leading to the bedrooms. She was kneeling in her room, half changed into workout gear. His heart clenched at the sight of a fresh bandage wrapped around her left hand.  
  
Steve leaned against the door frame. “Bucky says I need to apologise.”  
  
“Apology accepted.” Amy refused to look at him as she secured her hair in a high bun. She should have changed faster. “Run off and tell him you were a good boy and can have your cookie now.”  
  
“What the hell is with you lately?” Steve snapped. He was trying to apologise, and she was being needlessly hostile.  
  
“What is with _me?_ ” Amy hissed, eyes going dark. “I’m not the one who keeps forgetting that we broke up. That _you_ broke up with _me_.”  
  
Amy shoved by him into the hall. “Go take a shower Steve. I'll get Bucky to sleep and get out of your way.”  
  
“I don’t want….” Steve trailed off. She was gone and he had no idea what he actually wanted anyway.  
  
*****  
  
The extensive library that had been unpacked had been calling Bucky since he had seen the labelled crates. There was something so normal about reading before bed. He had been ecstatic when the books had actually been unpacked. So many titles he hadn’t read mixed in with old favourites. So far, this Jason Borne guy was pretty fun. Not a great spy, but Bucky understood his motivations. He stretched out on the bed, leaning back into the pillows and crossing his ankles. He was comfortable. He was safe. He had a good book to read. The only thing he was missing was someone to cuddle. Steve’s arm around him or Amy’s head in his lap while they read a book of their own sounded amazing. Or both. Both sounded even better.  
  
They just had to kiss and make up first. Steve had gone to find Amy ten minuets ago. It shouldn’t be too much longer. He could read until they joined him.  
  
Finally, the door to the bedroom opened and Amy came in… Alone.  
  
Bucky sighed when he saw the state Amy was in. This was not the appeased relaxed girl he had been hoping would join him. She was still furious and based on what she was wearing she wasn’t staying. He closed his book and set it on the bedside table. “He's not very good at apologies is he.”  
  
Amy perched herself carefully on the edge of the bed, tying her wrapped over-shirt tight around her. “No, he isn’t. It doesn’t matter though. I’m a big girl. I'll be fine.”  
  
Bucky traced the quilted pattern on her knee. She looked like she was on her way to get into trouble. “You’re not staying tonight.”  
  
Amy shook her head and brushed his hair back, sparks trailing from her fingers. “Not tonight. I think we need a little space to help us remember what our relationship is these days. Call if you have a nightmare okay? I'll come back and help you get settled again.”  
  
Bucky leaned into the caress, her hands were always so cool and soft. He though she could put him to sleep like this even without her powers. “Amy?”  
  
“Yes?” Amy said smiling down at him. None of this was Bucky’s fault. The only thing he was guilty of was being captured, something that wasn’t a failure in his world, only in hers. And maybe having poor taste in men, not that hers was any better.  
  
More calm spread through Bucky, making his limbs feel heavy and loose. He closed his eyes, sleep already tugging him under. This girl. This girl was something else, Steve was an idiot to mess things up with her. “I’m sorry he's as thick as two short planks sometimes.”  
  
“We all have our struggles. If anyone can whip him into shape it’s you.” Amy kissed the top of his head and let a few more sparks sink into him. “He’ll be good to you.”  
  
Bucky’s fingers slipped off Amy’s knee as he drifted off. She kissed his cheek one last time and eased herself carefully off the bed. He looked so sweet when he was asleep. She hoped Steve appreciated what he had.  
  
*****  
  
Amy let herself out the balcony doors and climbing her way to the ground along the outside of the building. From there she took off at a dead sprint towards the forest. She cleared every obstacle she encountered without breaking stride. Vaulting low walls, running up and over larger barriers, swinging from low hanging branches. Running helped. The exercise clearing her mind. The pain when she grabbed something with her injured hand focusing her thoughts.  
  
Once she was well within the forest left the ground entirely. Running, swinging, jumping, trusting herself to find her footing on the smooth wood even in the dark. she fixed her attention on a large tree and scaled it as high as she could go before the branches grew too thin to hold her. Winded and with legs that protested the sudden exertion after so much comparative inactivity the last few days, she sat and stared out at the tops of waving trees. Mentally mapping a path across the canopy, all they way to the mountains and the faint haze of the concealing forcefield.  
  
She couldn’t run forever, and she knew it. Eventually, she started back towards the palace. Her return trip was less frantic, more deliberate. Her feet just as steady, but her movements were controlled, reserved.  
  
She was calm again. In control of herself and her emotions.  
  
She let herself into her own room and made up her futon. She didn’t let herself sigh or regret her decision, as she stripped to her underwear and tumbled into the sheets. It would be good to sleep in her own bed. There wouldn’t be the jarring moment in the morning when she had to remind herself that she wasn’t allowed to feel good about where she was.  
  
If it took her longer to fall asleep than it had the night before she would blame it on the evening’s conversations. Obviously, her mind was too busy cataloguing all the new information she had gleaned to find rest easily.  
  
It had nothing to do with how cold her bed was or her missing the weight of Steve or Bucky’s arms around her. Nothing.  
  
*****  
  
Steve looked up from his computer. Bucky was standing frozen in the middle of the room. He’d been restless all morning, but Steve thought he had finally gotten back into his book and relaxed. The ridged way he was holding himself made Steve think he wasn’t relaxed at all anymore. “Bucky? What’s wrong?”  
  
“I won’t kill her. They can’t make me.” Bucky said sharply balling his hand into a fist.  
  
“Kill who Buck?” Steve abandoned the hacked report he was reading and slowly moved towards Bucky.  
  
Bucky blinked several times when Steve stepped into view. Steve shouldn’t be here. He didn’t look captured though. If Steve was free, he could help. Not him, it was too late to help him. But _Ryzhiy_ had made it out she still had a chance. “You have to warn her. Tell her not to take the mission with Doctor Prnomarenko. It isn’t safe.”  
  
“Bucky.” Steve said stepping even closer. Bucky had obviously lost track of where and when he was. Steve wasn’t entirely sure how to help. But he knew step one was stay calm and step two was don’t abandon him. Where were Sam and Amy when he needed them? They would know what to do.  
  
Bucky grabbed a fistful of Steve’s shirt. This was important. He had to understand. “She’s my daughter. I won’t do it. You have to get away. You have to save her.”  
  
Amy stepped out of the bathroom, piling her hair on top of her head.  
  
Steve motioned for her to come over and help him, trying to keep exactly how frantic he was feeling out of his movements and probably failing.  
  
Amy had managed to avoid the boys all morning. She had managed a full set of drills, a quick breakfast, and an indulgently long soak in the hot tub. Unfortunately, it looked like her relaxing was over. She let go of her hair and stepped in beside Steve, setting her hand over Bucky’s and gently loosening his fingers. “Bucky baby?”  
  
“Amy? Why are you in Odessa? You shouldn’t be here. I don’t want to hurt you either little Fox.” Bucky’s brow furrowed. Something wasn’t adding up. He didn’t think he was hallucinating. They both felt solid.  
  
“Do you know what day it is?” Amy asked rubbing his arm soothingly.  
  
“I don’t know. Some time in May.” Bucky snapped. That was a stupid question. She wasn’t taking this seriously either. Why were they even here if they weren’t going to help? “Does it matter, you have to take Steve and get out of here. Warn _Ryzhiy_. Keep them safe.”  
  
Amy made a decision. He needed help if he was going to find himself again quickly and gently. Help only she could really give him right now. “I will. You know I'll do anything to protect them. Just look at me for a second.” Amy cupped the side of his face and gently turned him towards her.  
  
Bucky cupped her face back. The little Fox had such amazing eyes. So bright and full of dancing sparks. She would keep Steve and _Ryzhiy_ safe. Something calm washed over him. Calm meant he could think again. He wasn’t in Odessa. He was safe in Wakanda.  
  
Bucky sat down hard. His heart-rate levelling out. Steve and Amy knelt on either side of him. Steve gently chafing his hand. Both of them looked worried, but unhurt. He felt like he’d been running for hours. “Fuck. How long was I out of it?”  
  
“Not long Buck. Nothing bad happened.” Steve squeezed his hand and tried to smile as reassuringly as he could.  
  
Amy chewed her lip. She hadn’t gone to bed with the boys last night. She had been punishing Steve and had slept in her own room. If Bucky had had nightmares. If he had decided to be stoic and suffer through rather than bother her when she was upset… “How did you sleep last night?”  
  
Bucky blushed and refused to look at her. He had woken up a couple of hours after she had left. Steve had started a nightmare and his twitching had woken Bucky. Bucky had stroked his hair until he settled back down. Then he had spent the rest of the night watching him to make sure another one didn’t start. “Not great.”  
  
Amy sat back on her heels. In her experience ‘not great sleep’ was the same as no sleep. Bucky hadn’t slept the first night either. “I don’t think your brain likes it when you don’t get enough rest.”  
  
Steve pressed his forehead to Bucky’s. He hadn’t noticed. He should have noticed that Buck wasn’t sleeping well. “You have to tell one of us if you’re not sleeping, Buck. Otherwise we can’t help you.”  
  
“Okay.” Bucky rubbed the back of Steve’s neck. Neither of them slept well before you added him interrupting with his own problems.  
  
Amy knew that okay. She had used that okay anytime she had no intention of listening to the person telling her to do something. That okay, meant I know what you’re asking and why, but I’m still not going to do it. She couldn’t call him on it. They weren’t that close. She looked over at Steve. He could. Bucky wouldn’t lie to Steve. “Make him promise.”  
  
"Bucky?"  
  
The guilt hit Bucky hard. His little Fox saw right through him. If he promised Steve, he would move heaven and earth to keep the promise. They were both looking at him. Steve imploringly, Amy expectantly. It looked like he was going to be waking someone else up when he couldn’t sleep. “I promise.”  
  
Steve looked up at Amy. They could handle this. As long as they were on the same side, they could handle anything. “You’ll help him get to sleep tonight? And maybe a nap right now?”  
  
“You know if I wanted I toddler I could go home and pop out a few babies to keep my family happy.” Amy sighed. Bucky could probably use a nap. The same way she could used a break from people looking at her like she had all the answers. She didn’t have any answers. Not for them. Not for herself.  
  
“Amy?” Steve reached out and cupped her elbow. He was an idiot. He shouldn’t be pushing her away. They needed her. In whatever form she was willing to let them have her.  
  
“Of course, I will.” Amy combed her fingers through Bucky’s hair. He would have made beautiful toddlers. So would Steve.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky woke from the enforced nap with his head in Amy’s lap. He did feel better when he slept.  
  
Amy smiled down at him serenely. This boy with his breakdowns and grateful eyes was really testing he ability to maintain her geisha mask.  
  
Bucky traced her jaw line. He suspected most people never saw anything in those eyes if she didn’t want them to. That only made him more curious about her inner thoughts. “Were you serious? About the babies?”  
  
Amy let out a relived breath. He remembered. That was good. It can’t have been that bad if he remembered what she had said before he passed out. “That my family thinks I should have some? Yeah, they do. They’re worried I left it too late.”  
  
“What about you? Do you want kids or are they an obligation?” Bucky shifted up the bed, so he was leaning next to her.  
  
Amy let him slip his arm around her and pull her head onto his shoulder. Going by his heart-rate he found it steadying, she was oddly soothed by it too. It helped soften the blow of this conversation. “I wanted to find the right person to have them with. Not sure what that person even looks like anymore. Maybe I should just do it on my own. Well not on my own. I’d have Dai and a full staff.”  
  
“I wish I could help.” He purred rubbing her back. His fingers slipping under the hem of her shirt. He was never going to get used to how soft she was.  
  
Amy captured his hand and pulled it away. His touch felt too good. It was only a short step from there to letting him kiss her and she didn’t think her logical brain would win any arguments after that. “Flirt. You have a boyfriend in case you hadn’t noticed.”  
  
Bucky slid his fingers against hers. He had Steve. Boyfriend didn’t seem like a big enough word to cover what they were to each other. Steve wasn’t the reason he couldn’t help Amy make beautiful babies though. “I couldn’t do anything about it anyway. Nat isn’t the only one they took that away from. All I have left are the showy parts. They seem to work at least, even if I haven’t been willing to risk having a partner help me test them.”  
  
Amy kissed his cheek softly. They had taken a lot away form Bucky. There was only one thing she could give him back that might almost make a dent in that pain. A life with the man he loved. They could be happy. She would give almost anything to make them happy. “You wouldn’t even need that to keep Steve happy. He'll love whatever you can give him.”  
  
Bucky nuzzled the side of Amy’s head. Steve would make beautiful babies. “He could help.”  
  
“I think last night proved why that is a bad idea.” Amy cut him off. She didn’t want to think about that. The idea of Steve’s children had been painful when she and Steve weren’t at each other’s throats all the time. It was excruciating now.  
  
“They’d be pretty though.” Blond hair and purple eyes. Bucky loved that baby already.  
  
"Sure they would be." Amy rolled her eyes. He was sappy when he woke up. She really should leave this part to Steve… and get out of here before she cried and undermined the air of graceful calm she had cultivated. “I’m getting up.”  
  
“You mean you’re avoiding the conversation.” Bucky laughed kissing her fingertips as she pulled away. She didn’t want to talk about it right now, that was fine. But they would talk about it at some point. Bucky had some ideas about the future and making Steve happy himself, and Amy featured prominently in many of them.  
  
Amy patted his cheek. “You can’t prove anything. Send Wanda to get me when dinner is ready.”  
  
Bucky watched her walk away. Things were great when Steve and Amy forgot to be mad at each other. Those early mornings when they were all tangled together. Or the ‘family’ dinners when they all ate together. The few times Steve had made Amy laugh. The light in Amy’s eyes when Steve did something sweet for her.  
  
If they would just kiss and make up, his life would be so much easier. He could remember that he loved Steve through serious brainwashing. How could they both forget that they were in love so easily?


	28. Sparring Season and Second Attempts

Amy collapsed to the floor, breathing hard. Running drills on her own wasn’t nearly as effective as sparing with a partner. They were too formulaic. There was too much room to _think_.  
  
Steve felt like an electrical current was coursing through him, pinning him to the floor just outside the door. How many times had he seen Amy's morning workout? He could only think of a handful. No wonder he had forgotten how she looked with her blade whipping around her, face expressionless, except for her eyes, which blazed with vicious pleasure at the exercise. She was beautiful. It also looked like she was done for the day.  
  
Amy debated getting up from the floor. She had known she had an audience for the last few minutes. She had been determined not to let him throw her off. She had started the pattern it would take more than one sad pair of eyes to keep her from finishing it. Now she had. She could acknowledge him. She didn’t have look at him though. Instead she draped an arm across her eyes to block out the light. “Rogers.”  
  
“I have terrible timing.” Steve wished he could lay next to her. Rest his forehead against hers and just breath her in for a few minutes. But there was no way she would let him get away with that right now.  
  
“You do.” Amy rolled to her feet. She didn’t like the softness of his voice. He was going to try and be sweet again. At this rate he was going to give her emotional whiplash. She rummaged through her gear bag. Waiting for him to either say something or leave her to her misery. “Was there something specific or are you just going around announcing your deficiencies now? Because I don’t hate that plan.”  
  
Steve winced. She was still mad. “Okay, I deserve that.”  
  
He edged into the room slowly. He’d been an asshole. He knew that in retrospect. He was hoping she’d be willing to hear him out today. Amy was reasonable, she would see logic, and she had always forgiven him in the past.  
  
“I was hoping you would let me spar with you, I need more practice fighting without my shield.” Steve watched her shoulders rise and fall. She was still recovering from the last few weeks. He shouldn’t push her. “You’re clearly wrapping up here. I'll uh… I'll figure something else out.”  
  
“No. No, it’s fine.” She closed her eyes to centre herself. He needed to practice. And she hadn’t worn herself out enough to still her mind yet anyway. She wiped a towel across the back of her neck. Of course, she would say yes. She had only said no to him once... “Give me a minute to catch my breath and I’ll be good to go a few more rounds.”  
  
Steve hesitated. She seemed reluctant. He needed to train, and he needed to talk to her. “Are you sure?”  
  
She wasn’t. It was a terrible idea. Every time they spared together, they ended up rolling around on the mats. It hadn’t been a problem when they were together. It would be now. “Grab a quarter staff before I change my mind.”  
  
Amy took one look at his hold and changed her mind about what weapon she would be using against him. His grip and stance were both terrible. She would need to be in close to fix them regularly. She hung her naginata back on its rack and grabbed a wooden practice sword instead.  
  
“We missed you again last night.” Steve said softly. Had she slept at all? He hadn’t. Amy must have sat on his side when she was getting Bucky to sleep. He’d spent all night unable to concentrate on anything other than the fact his pillow smelt like her.  
  
Amy adjusted his hands and kicked the back of his leg to get him to bend his knees. “Did Bucky sleep?”  
  
Bucky had slept like a baby, nuzzling into Steve’s pillow and muttering about pretty babies in sleepy French. Listening to him had helped lull Steve into the little sleep he had gotten. “That doesn’t mean we didn’t miss you.”  
  
“It means you didn’t need me. Guard up.” Amy started the exchange. Slashing at Steve’s right side.  
  
Steve dodged, stuck, fumbling his guard. She was fighting offensively today. Hitting fast before retreating. Not exactly her normal style. “You’re favouring your left side.”  
  
“I was recently blown up. If you were any kind of threat, I might go harder, but as it is, there is no reason not to be kind to my body.” Amy said crisply before smacking his ankle. “Feet apart.”  
  
Steve was remembering how frustrating it was to fight Amy when she was actually trying. No matter what he did he couldn’t seem to connect at all. She danced around him. Smacking any limb he let slip out of position or jabbing him in the side if he didn’t bring his guard up fast enough.  
  
“Sticks have two ends, watch your back hand.” Amy rapped his knuckles with the flat of her blade. He was still such a brawler. No form to speak of.  
  
Steve shook out the hand, that had stung. “I have almost a foot and close to 100 pounds on you. How do you keep getting inside my guard with that short little thing?”  
  
“I’m better at this than you are. Shoulders back.” She lunged past his guard again. Stabbing him in the offending deltoid.  
  
Steve considered her attack pattern. She was faster too. Not necessarily faster than him. But faster than he remembered her being. And showing off a little. She could have stepped out of the way of his strike instead of diving over it. “You’re trying to distract me.”  
  
“I’m trying to stop you getting yourself killed if you go into the field carrying one of those.” Amy paused her attack and moved his hands back to a proper grip; they had been drifting apart. He really was going to get himself killed if he didn’t get better at this. “You know, Shuri would probably make you a shield if Bucky asked. She has a soft spot for him.”  
  
Steve smiled at her. She did still care. “Don’t we all? She offered. I don’t know. It doesn’t feel right. I think that part of my life is over. I’m not Captain America anymore. I’m someone else. Someone unmoored. Someone lost.”  
  
“I think a lot of us feel that way right now.” Amy confessed spinning away again. She couldn’t hope to match his strength if he got her in close. If she wanted to win, she needed to stay mobile…and she was pretty sure she wouldn’t be able to stop herself kissing him if he wrapped his arms around her and looked down at her all vulnerable. Head firmly on her shoulders. Attractive man firmly at arm’s length. She was mad at him and she was going to kick his ass. That was that.  
  
“Is it alright if I had an ulterior motive for training with you?” Steve asked side stepping a slash, but not quite managing to get his staff up in time to block her back swinging.  
  
“Depends on what it was. Your feet are too close together.” She squatted and swept a foot towards his narrow stance. How many times did she have to say feet apart before it stuck?  
  
Steve jumped the sweep landing with a better footing. “I also wanted to try apologising again. And you know I’m better at talking when I’m doing something.”  
  
“You really don’t have to.” Amy dropped her eyes. She didn’t want another apology. The last one had cut too close to the bone.  
  
“I do. You deserve an explanation.” Steve adjusted his grip. He wanted her to look at him. What he really wanted was her to step into his arms and let him hold her. That felt like a few steps to far.  
  
Amy shrugged and gestured for him to continue with the tip of her sword. “If you insist.”  
  
“I get jealous. You know that. I was stupid, and vulnerable, and I don’t like the idea of other guys looking at you like they want to take you home to bed. I especially don’t like it when I know there is a chance, you’ll let them.” Steve shifted his grip on his staff. The only bed she belonged in was his. Which had recently turned into his and Bucky’s bed, but that didn’t change that Amy belonged there, not fooling around with someone else.  
  
“Well I can help a little there. I’m not going to sleep with anyone el--,” Amy cut herself off. Not anyone else. She wasn’t going to sleep with Steve. She wasn’t going to sleep with Bucky. She was going to keep herself under control. “With anyone. While I’m here. No one needs the extra complications.”  
  
“I-- Thank you, Amy… that’s… generous of you.” That was a huge weight off his shoulders. He wouldn’t have to watch her fall in love with someone else. Except Bucky. Bucky treated Amy like a teddy bear. Rubbing up against her, nuzzling her skin, resting his head in her lap when they were sitting together, finding ways to make her laugh and smile. That didn’t bother him the way the thought of anyone else touching her did. The opposite. He loved seeing them together.  
  
When she was here at least.  
  
“It’s practical.” Amy replied blandly. She rolled the practice sword around her wrist and launched another assault on Steve’s sloppy guard.  
  
They ran through another few exchanges. Steve was finding his rhythm, actually managing to block most of Amy’s strikes. Or maybe she was just lulling him into a false sense of security.  
  
Amy flicked her wrist and Steve’s staff went flying. “You’re a mess. Have Nat show you the basic drills. You need muscle memory.”  
  
Tucking her sword under her arm, Amy turned towards her gear bag. She needed a shower. A long cold shower… and a drink.  
  
“I’m still in love with you.” Steve called before she could get too far away.  
  
Amy set her face firmly in a neutral expression. She wasn’t going to give him the satisfaction of snapping at him. This was just cruel. Tugging at her heartstrings. He had Bucky now. There was no reason to string her along anymore. Especially not when he had cut their limited time together short in the first place. “What exactly am I supposed to do with that information, Steve?”  
  
“I don’t know. I don’t even know what I want to do with it. I just thought you should know.” He wanted her to know and say she loved him too. Say she was with him through all of this. That they could get through anything. That she forgave him. That he didn’t have to worry about other guys even when she was away. Something. Anything. He took a hesitant step towards her.  
  
Even if she yelled at him right now. That would still be something. It would still show she cared. Instead the geisha mask slid across her eyes. Hiding any and all emotions, and she turned away from him.  
  
“Stop dropping your guard before a strike and looked at everything not just where you’re trying to hit.” She couldn’t look at him. Who just said that sort of thing? She started shedding her gear. Hand wraps off. Practice sword back it it’s place. She had to get out of here. There was only so long she could keep her face impassive around him before the cracks started to show. She couldn’t run. She could abandon her gear bag and come back for it later. She did, keeping her face turned away from Steve as she made for the door.  
  
Steve grabbed her arm. “I love you. I'll try to do a better job of letting you go if that’s what you want. But I never stopped loving you. And I’m not about to.”  
  
Amy looked up at him silently. He would be able to see the pain from this close if he was looking for it. She didn’t care. Let him know that this conversation had hurt her. Maybe it would stop him from trying to have it again. Gods, she couldn’t have it again. Not without breaking. He was in love with Bucky. For fucks sake, he had burned his entire world to keep Bucky safe. Why the hell was he tormenting her like this?  
  
Steve let his hand drop. He knew it wasn’t as easy as it sounded. He still hoped they could work something out so they could stop making each other miserable. He wondered if she would let him kiss away some of the suffering he could see in those lovely violet eyes. No. If he tried, she’d just put him on his back. Probably break his wrist while she was at it given how much anger was there too. “I love you.”  
  
“Stop saying that like it changes anything.” So much for not snapping at him. Amy ground her teeth. She had absolutely no self-control around Steve. It was a problem.  
  
“It’s true.” Steve said defensively. Love should have been enough before, but he’d been an idiot. If she would just give him one more try it could be enough now.  
  
Amy rubbed her eyes. She knew he could be smart when he tried. So how was he this blind? “It doesn’t _matter_ if it’s true or not. Because you know what else is true? You’re in love with Bucky.”  
  
Steve blinked at her. He was. But she had been okay with that. Hadn’t she? “That’s not--“  
  
Amy cut him off sharply. “Not what? Not true? Do you usually tell the girl you’re sleeping with that you’re in love with someone else when you’re not? Repeatedly.”  
  
“No. I--“ He'd told her because it would have been wrong not to. She’d needed to know before she made plans to spend the rest of her life with him….  
  
A realisation struck him. He had told her so she could plan for their life together, and afterwards she been very careful not to promise him forever. Even when she'd talked about kids, she'd talked about _his_ children, not _their_ children. She’d avoided any guarantees until he forced her hand…  
  
Amy pushed on without waiting for his explanation. “Even if you hadn’t told me, an idiot could see it. The way you look at him. The way you talk about him. The way you just know when someone else is talking about him. It doesn’t matter if you love me. If you ever loved me. You love him. He loves you. And here’s the thing. The big thing that you seem to be wilfully ignoring. He needs you. I don’t. I never did and never will. So it truly _does not matter_ if you love me. Or I love you. It doesn’t even matter if I did all of this because I’m head over heels for both of you, or if I only did it because I felt guilty. He loves you. He needs you.”  
  
“Amy--“  
  
Amy took a deep centring breath. She needed to use her training. Keep him off balance. Use his strength against him. Keep herself in one piece. “You said you’d do anything for me. Is that still true?”  
  
“You know it is.” Steve almost whispered. Had he really hurt her that badly? He never wanted to hurt Amy. He wanted…. He had no idea what he wanted anymore. The last month had changed everything. He knew he wanted Amy and Bucky safe and happy. Beyond that he was lost.  
  
“Good. Then go. Go cuddle with the man you love. Make sure he knows how much you love him. Stay with him. Live happily ever after. And leave me out of it.” Amy whipped around and stalked out of the room. Shoulders back head held high. She still had some pride. She needed to get out of here if she wanted to keep it.  
  
“Where are you going?” Steve called after her.  
  
“Out.” Forget the shower and the drink. She was going to find a something taller than a tree and climb it. Wasn't there a waterfall around here somewhere?  
  
*****  
  
Steve didn't follow Amy's instructions right away. He wasn't in the right place to be with Bucky right now. He needed a long cold shower, and to have a serious conversation with himself.  
  
Amy had been right. Bucky was the one who needed him right now. Everything else had to come second to making sure Bucky was alright. He knew that. It was just hard, seeing Amy every day, knowing that they both had feelings and not being able to do anything about it.  
  
The cold shower helped clear his head, even if it didn't do anything for the lump in his stomach. He stepped out of the water, and wrapped a towel around his hips, draping a second towel over his shoulder. The soft fluffy cotton smelled like Amy, or her laundry detergent at least. How was he supposed to put her out of his mind when she was everywhere?  
  
"So." Sam leaned against the sink, crossing his arms over his chest and putting on his best councillor's face. "You want to talk about why Ayame stormed out of here looking like someone insulted her mother?"  
  
Steve sighed and rubbed the towel over his head. "Not really. I did something stupid."  
  
Sam raised an eyebrow. When it came to the ‘Amy situation’ that didn’t narrow it down all that much. "Like what? You didn't propose to her again, did you?"  
  
Steve winced. He hadn't gone quiet that far. "Not quite. I told her I love her. It didn't go down well."  
  
"Yeah, I imagine it didn't." Sam shook his head. Captain fucking America. Save the world? No problem. Fight aliens? Easy. Talk to the girl he liked? Disaster. "It's good to know you're bad at something, Rogers."  
  
"I just wish I wasn't bad at the girl sleeping in my bed every night." Steve sighed. Or if everything was actually as easy as he made it look.  
  
Sam snorted. "Oh, I don't think that will be an issue tonight."  
  
Steve clapped him on the shoulder and grabbed his pants. "Weren't you supposed to be reassuring me?"  
  
"I don't remember saying that. I'm obviously here for a shower." Sam laughed and stripped off his own shirt.  
  
******  
  
The soldier was back. Electricity buzzing through his head. The other one had lost control. The other one had been in control for a long time without the handler punishing them. That was bad. That meant they were supposed to have returned to base and didn’t. It was one thing for the other one to steal a few hours here and there. But it had been… days? Weeks? The soldier wasn’t sure. But it was too long. They would be punished if they went they went back now.  
  
But they had to go back. No matter what the other one said they always had to go back. If they didn’t go back the handler would find them and that would be worse.  
  
He curled tighter into a ball everything hurt. Maybe that was why he hadn’t gone back to base. Maybe he had been hurt too badly to make it back. The other one tended to take over when they were hurt.  
  
He needed to return to base. They would make the pain go away at base. Moving hurt too much. He would stay here. They would find him eventually. They always found him. If he was too hurt to make it back to base on his own, the handler probably wouldn’t punish him too badly… which handler did he have right now?  
  
“Buck? Hey. Bucky, you doin' alright?” Stupid question, Steve could have kicked himself. It was obvious from the hall that something was wrong. Bucky looked like he was in pain and he wasn’t responding at all. Just shaking and rocking in the fetal position on the floor.  
  
The voice sounded far away. Like it was coming for underwater. The soldier stiffened. Another shock jolting through him, both electric and mental. He knew that voice. That was his Stevie. He needed to get away from that voice. If they found him and Steve was here. They would take him too. He couldn’t let the handlers take Steve.  
  
Steve fumbled his phone to his ear. Grateful that an 'everyday' phone had been among all things he had unpacked, and that it had Amy's number in it. Even more grateful when she answered on the second ring, even if he was met by stoney silence from her and a full background roar he couldn't place. Bucky needed help. Help he couldn’t give. “You need to get back here. Something is wrong with Buck… He won't answer me…. If I knew what was wrong, I would tell you…. I’m not freaking out…if I am it's justified.”  
  
The voice wasn’t talking to him anymore. The soldier looked around in panic. His eyes weren’t working right. He needed maintenance. There was something big and warm in the direction Steve’s voice was coming from. Too big to be Steve. Too big… and Steve wasn’t talking to him… Was someone else in the room? Had they found him? He needed to protect Steve. How could he protect Steve?  
  
“Its going to be alright Buck. Amy’s on her way. She can help.” Steve tried to keep his voice a reassuring as possible, even though he was only about 80% sure it was true. She’d been able to help before. He didn’t know what he would do if she couldn’t help.  
  
The voice was coming from the big warm thing. The soldier remembered. Steve was big now. Steve was. No. No. Don’t think about that. They hurt him if he thought about that. He just had to get to Steve. Protect him. The soldier grabbed the big warm thing's arm with his flesh hand. The arm was missing. Did they remove it for maintenance? Unimportant. Protect Steve. Cover his head and vital organs. Everything else was unimportant.  
  
The foot sweep caught Steve off guard. He went down in a heap. Bucky landing on top of him and immediately curling around his head and chest, pinning him to the ground. Bucky seemed more stable now that he had Steve under him. The shaking had stopped at least.  
  
Steve wrapped his arms around Bucky protectively. They could stay here on the floor if that’s what Bucky wanted. Amy was on her way. They could just hold each other until she got here. Whatever Bucky wanted.  
  
*****  
  
A cool hand on his head. The soldier didn’t flinch away from the touch. The other one knew that touch. The other one liked it. That hand never hurt him.  
  
“Bucky baby. Look at me. Everything is alright. But I need you to look at me.” Amy poured her power into him a steady stream of sparks.  
  
Steve could just make out Amy’s face through Bucky’s hair. Her eyes softly concerned. Her voice relaxed and authoritative. He covered Amy's hand with his own. He could feel the calm spill over into his skin as well. They would be alright. They would all be alright. Dimly, he noted that Amy's hair was wet.  
  
Look. Yes look. That voice belonged to the good feeling. Listen to it. The voice would take the pain away. The soldier lifted his head. Just a little. Not enough that anyone could get to Steve. Glowing purple eyes found his and he fell into them. Calm. He felt so calm looking at those eyes. The pain didn’t go away entirely, but the panic receded, and he could think again.  
  
“There. That’s better isn’t it.” Amy stroked Bucky’s hair. Gently working his grip on Steve’s collar free and sliding him into her lap. “We’ve got you.”  
  
The soldier could feel his grip slipping. The other one would have control of the body soon. That was okay. The other one was even more vicious when it came to protecting Steve. And the voice would keep the handlers away.  
  
Steve leaned heavily against Amy’s side. They should get off the floor now. Move out of the living room. Bucky would feel safer in the bedroom. Amy passed him Bucky’s hand and he stroked it gently. In a minute. They could move in a minute.  
  
Bucky blinked up at them. Steve’s worried face. Amy’s serine one. And burst into tears. Harsh racking sobs shaking him.  
  
Steve wrapped his arms around Bucky, catching Amy in the hug. Dragging both of them into his lap, he rocked them gently. “Shh. Shh. It’s okay. Nothing bad happened. You’re safe.”  
  
“I could…” Bucky’s voice broke. He buried his face in Steve’s neck. “I could have killed you.”  
  
“Didn’t even try Buck.” Steve whispered. He was on the edge of tears himself. Bucky was in so much pain and he had no idea how to help.  
  
Amy wiggled out of Steve’s arms and reached a hand down to help them up. “Come on. Let’s get you both cleaned up and into bed.”  
  
Amy stayed with them. Passing Steve soap in the shower and gently towelling Bucky’s hair dry.  
  
She was the one who found them both pyjamas, matching the colours automatically. Steve managed a small smile at that as she tucked the blankets firmly around them. That was his girl, subconsciously making sure he always looked his best. He wished she would let herself change into something comfortable too. She had put a clean new gi on after the shower. Leaving the jacket untied, but carefully cinching the pants tight around her hips.  
  
Amy knelt on the edge of the bed so she could lean in and kiss Bucky on the forehead. She pulled back with a serine smile. “Rest. You'll feel better.”  
  
Buck caught her wrist. Dimly he recognised her quickly concealed flinch. He would try and remember to ask about that when his brain didn’t feel like pop rocks. “No.”  
  
“No? You don’t think you’ll feel better?” Amy shifted so he was holding her hand rather than her wrist and stroked her thumb over his reassuringly.  
  
“No. Don’t go.” Bucky pleaded in a whisper. He tugged on her hand earnestly. He wanted her to curl up with them too. When he woke up, he wanted to know that they were both with him and safe. He didn’t like that she hadn’t slept with them the last few nights. This was where she belonged.  
  
Amy brushed his hair back from his face tenderly. She was absolutely helpless in the face of those sweet grey eyes. “I’ll stay until you’re asleep.”  
  
“Thank you.” Steve mouthed over Bucky’s head. He was still an idiot, and he couldn't seem to have a conversation with her without making her want to kill him, but having Amy here would help him sleep as much as it helped Bucky. He wouldn't have to worry about either of them as long as they were both safely together with him. Every time the three of them curled up in bed together Steve’s heart unclenched. A feeling of rightness washing over him.


	29. Taking Care of Each Other

Steve woke up an hour later with a distinct sense of something wrong. Pressed against his side, Bucky was still sleeping exhaustedly. That wasn’t what was wrong. The far side of the bed was empty.  
  
Amy was gone.  
  
*****  
  
Amy rested her head against the cool side of the toilet. She felt awful. She had been doing such a good job of not draining herself so much that she got sick. Finding the balance between enough power to help calm her boys down and not so much that she ended up throwing up.  
  
Steve closed the door softly behind himself. He had hoped that Amy had just gone to her own room to sleep. Seeing her like this hurt him. She was pushing herself too hard to help Bucky, and he didn’t think he could ask her to go easier. “You alright?”  
  
Amy twisted her head just enough that she could see his face. “When was the last time you asked someone in this position that question and had the answer be a genuine yes?”  
  
“It’s been a while.” Steve sunk down next to her. The fact she hadn’t told him to get lost was a sign of exactly how bad she was. Amy didn’t like to be coddled through little things.  
  
Amy let him lift her into his lap. His warmth felt good on her aching muscles.  
  
He pressed the back of his hand to her forehead. “You’re clammy, but I don’t think you have a fever.” If anything, she felt too cold.  
  
Amy groaned and shifted so her back was against his chest. Sitting like this made her heart flutter less than when he cradled her in his arms. “Darn. I was hoping I had malaria. Otherwise this is just my own stupidity.”  
  
“Well your own stupidity has earned you a nap where I know you’re warm and safe.” Steve scooped her up and stood carefully so he didn’t jostle her too much.  
  
“Steve.” Amy whispered as he shifted her against his chest. This was terrible idea. He’d said he still loved her. She couldn’t let him baby her. She so wanted to. She was doomed when it came time to extract her heart.  
  
Steve ignored her pleading and tucked her head against his neck. “Don’t fight me on this. I want you both where I can see you for the next little while.” It had been a hard day for him too. He was going to be selfish and find comfort where he could. She could yell at him again tomorrow.  
  
She couldn’t fight him on it. She was exhausted. All she wanted to do was sleep for a week, and Steve’s bed sounded like a reasonable place to do that.  
  
Back in Steve’s room she stripped down to her tank top and panties. They had both seen her in less and given the condition all three of them were in right now she didn’t think either of them would get ideas. She would rather be comfortable than modest.  
  
*****  
  
Nestled between Steve and Amy was a great way to wake up. The shadows on the ceiling danced, almost in time with the breathing on either side of him. Steve’s deep and regular. Amy’s a little shallower, with tiny breathless hitches when something happened in her dreams. Bucky could get used to this very fast. Even if it was still to early to be awake. Now that he was his mind was too full to go back to sleep right away. Steve had done something to piss off the little Fox all over again. He hated when they fought. Life was so much better when they were getting along. At least, he thought it was, he hadn’t experienced that much of it. So why had Steve undermined all his progress in getting back to it.  
  
When he was out, Steve could sleep through anything, and it sounded like he was out. That was alright. The little Fox had the answers he needed. And she slept like a predator, like him, always alert. “Amy?” Bucky whispered.  
  
Amy rolled onto her back and stretched. She was starting to feel a little better, but she could have used a few more hours of sleep. She didn’t think she was alone in that. “You should be asleep.”  
  
Bucky twisted a lock of her hair around his finger. He didn’t like when Steve and Amy fought. “What did Steve do?”  
  
Amy bit her lip. She couldn’t not tell him. Fuck Steve for putting her in this situation. “He… He told me he still loves me. Which was… Just stupid. He loves you more than he loves me. He does. And it’s not fair that he keeps acting like he doesn’t.”  
  
Bucky waited, gently stroking her hair while he did. There was more. There was something big she wasn’t telling him. Maybe something she hadn’t told Steve. Something that would help explain why she and Steve were so tense around each other when they so obviously cared about each other.  
  
Amy closed her eyes. Why did she want to show him her scars? She had never felt the need to tell Steve. She had known he loved her, and that seeing the broken pieces of her heart would hurt him, and that he would hold the pieces together without needing to see them all. Was it because deep down she knew he was one of the few people as broken as she was? Or was it just because of those soft questioning eyes? Whatever it was she did. She wanted to pour her heart into his hands, say ‘here mine is broken too’, and let him see if any of the pieces could be put back together. “I died. Literally died. That is what it means when a Fox turns her collar. She has to die and find her way back. It isn’t something most people are strong enough to do. I died, clawed my way back to life, spent months dragging myself across hostile territory. The first person I asked for when I got back was Steve. He made me feel safe, and warm, and cared for, and then everything went wrong… I was almost over it. I was almost okay again. And now he wants to act like none of the bad stuff every happened, like it wasn’t inevitable. Which isn’t an option, because again, he loves you more.”  
  
Bucky pulled his hand out of her hair. Why wasn’t it an option? They were all pretending that his bad stuff didn’t matter. Why should whatever happened between her and Steve? She had found a way to live for Steve. Couldn’t she find a way to live with both of them? Steve might love him more, but he did love Amy. And Bucky didn’t want her to leave either. When they weren’t fighting, she was good for Steve, and for him. Maybe it was just the middle of the night talking, but he didn't see the issue. “Maybe…”  
  
Amy rolled over so her back was towards Bucky. She wasn’t going to cry in front of him and she had said too much already. “Go back to sleep, Bucky baby. Everything will make more sense in the morning.”  
  
Bucky sighed and pulled her into his chest. What was he going to do with these stubborn beautiful people? “Nothing has made any sense for a very long-time, baby girl.”  
  
On his other side a sleeping Steve snuggled closer, tucking his head into Bucky’s shoulder, his hair tickling Bucky’s cheek.  
  
“Almost nothing.” Bucky amended, kissing the back of Amy’s head. This made more sense than anything had a right to. They just needed to… fine-tune things a little.  
  
*****  
  
The sunlight coming through the window had moved far to the west when any of them stirred in the big bed. Amy groaned and rolled onto her stomach, her shirt riding up and twisting around her awkwardly. She felt better but it was still too early to wake up. Sneaking out in the mornings had completely screwed up her sleep schedule. At least Nat knew now, she didn't have to keep sneaking around if she kept sleeping here. That was a big if. A cold ball of ice grew in her stomach. Why had she told Bucky all of that last night?  
  
“Morning beautiful.” Waking up between Steve and Amy twice in one day. Maybe he should lose control more often. He stroked Amy’s side softly. Okay, that was a stupid plan, but there had to be a way to have this turn in to a regular occurrence.  
  
A flash of colour made him focus on where his hand was. There was something bright and inky on Amy’s ribs. Bucky pushed the hem of her shirt a little higher, revealing the full extent of her tattoo. Each element drew his eye in turn. A twisted cherry tree, blossoms blowing in the wind. A rope knotted around the trunk. A delicate fox seated under the fall of blossoms, looking up at… At a north star that could only represent Steve. It was beautiful. A story, her story, inked directly onto her skin. He wondered if Steve had ever kissed each blossom and asked what it all meant. “How have I never seen this before?”  
  
Amy choose to ignore the flirting in favour of figuring out how Bucky was holding up. Rolling back over put her practically nose to nose with her target. His eyes were brighter, maybe too bright. He seemed alert and in the moment. The flirting and the way he kept Steve’s hand on his knee meant he was feeling like himself, which was the important thing really. “How are you doing?”  
  
“Better. Still… raw.” Bucky thought of facing the rest of the world. Even the empty suite seemed like too much right now. He wanted to stay in this soft bubble with these safe people and forget about everything else, at least for a while. “Can we stay here for a while?”  
  
“Of course, Buck.” Steve murmured pulling him in closer. He liked when Bucky was his little spoon. They could stay here all day if that was what Bucky wanted.  
  
Amy tucked Bucky’s hair behind his ear with a soft smile. They would be okay. These were just little speed bumps. The boys loved each other enough to overcome pretty much anything. She slipped out of the sheets. Where were her pants again?  
  
Bucky’s hand shot out and grabbed her again, this time wrapping his fingers tight around hers. “Don’t run away. I want you too.”  
  
The ball of ice in Amy’s stomach cracked and groaned. “I’ll come back. But you have to let me feed you. You both need calories.”  
  
*****  
  
Amy climbed back into the bed carefully balancing the tray of sandwiches and juice. She passed a drink to each man. Orange juice for Steve. Cranberry juice in a spill proof tumbler for Bucky, that way he could set it down wherever when he wanted to eat. With the sandwiches balanced on Steve’s knee, she settled against the pillows with her own ginger tea and packet of rice crackers.  
  
“You’re an angel.” Steve said around a mouthful of peanut butter and sweet strawberry jam.  
  
Amy shook her head. She was no gentle messenger. Maybe if he had figured that out before they wouldn’t be in this mess. “Goddess. And I’m still mad at you.”  
  
“There’s a difference?” The words were muted by another sticky mouthful. Amy had been right. Now that he had food, he was starving.  
  
Amy sipped her tea considering how best to answer. “Angels have to be good. Goddesses are allowed to be more…. Complicated.”  
  
Steve wanted to argue with that. She was good. Better than almost everyone else he knew. Even if she didn’t seem to believe that. She had made mistakes sure, but she had worked hard to make up for them. She was also still mad at him, so attempting to convince her she was a better person than she thought she was would only lead to another fight.  
  
Bucky nuzzled into Amy’s neck. This was so much better than the mornings where one of them just disappeared. When Amy disappeared. Steve always waited for him to wake up, even when Bucky could tell he wanted to start his day. “Let her be complicated. As long as she stays.”  
  
Amy pushed his head away gently. “She won’t stay if you spill her drink.”  
  
Bucky grinned and nipped at the strap of her shirt. He tugged it off her shoulder, so it fell down prettily. She was staying. His little Fox was going to stay and take care of them. “You’d come back though. After all, Steve loves you.”  
  
Amy glared at him. This flirting thing could get out of hand very quickly if he kept doing that sort of thing. Steve had almost choked on his sandwich.  
  
“Too soon?” Bucky pouted and batted his eyelashes at her.  
  
“Too soon.” Amy confirmed taking another sip of her tea. Her inability to stay irritated at him might be more of an issue than the flirting.


	30. Eggs and Baskets

Bucky drifted off sometime between Steve starting his second sandwich and Amy finishing her tea. He was still more than a little exhausted. His head dropped onto Steve’s chest. His cup tipped over in his lap. Liquid sloshing, but not spilling thanks to the sippy cup.  
  
As far as Amy was concerned that was her signal to leave. She wasn’t about to spend all day lounging around with two people who were in love with each other. She had better things to do. She had left a sports bra in here before bed a couple of days ago. It should still be here.  
  
“Where are you going?” Steve asked as Amy slipped out of the bed. It didn’t look like she was just dashing to the bathroom or to get a refill of her tea.  
  
“Naginata practice. Two hours. Everyday. Any of this ringing a bell?” Amy scanned the room for her bra without looking at him There it was. She grabbed it out of the corner and yanked it on over her tank top.  
  
Steve looked between Bucky’s soft sleepy features and Amy getting dressed. Bucky had wanted her to stay. He wanted her to stay too, but he wasn’t sure how convincing that argument would be. “He’ll be upset if he wakes up and you’re not here.”  
  
“He has a boyfriend who can explain it to him.” She shimmied her top out from under the bra and pulled it back on. That would do for now.  
  
Steve frowned. There was a lot of bite in the way she said that. “You’re still pissed at me.”  
  
“Yup.” Amy popped her ‘p’ irritably as she twisted her hair into a topknot. She wasn’t sure if the elastic she had grabbed was hers or Bucky’s. It didn’t really matter. It would serve its purpose either way.  
  
Steve stomach flipped. He didn’t know what to do around Amy anymore. Everything was so complicated. She had let him carry her into bed last night. Her fingers had curled around his in her sleep. Was she only nice to him when she was sick? “I thought we were better.”  
  
“When exactly did things get better?” She asked hopping into her gi pants. The way she remembered it Bucky had needed them, and then Steve had thought her sleeping on the bathroom floor was a bad idea. A sentiment she agreed with, although now that she was awake and feeling better, she would have preferred if he’d taken her to her own bed.  
  
Steve sighed and rubbed his eyes. Things were better when they weren’t fighting. Thing were better when they were curled up all in bed. They had been better this morning. If she just got back into bed, they could keep getting better. “Come on Amy.”  
  
“Don’t ‘Come on Amy’ me.” Amy growled tightening the drawstring on her pants.  
  
Bucky grumbled in his sleep and rolled over into Amy’s empty spot. Steve scrambled to grab his cup before it could get lost in the covers. Knowing their luck, Bucky would manage to unscrew the top, and Steve didn’t think waking up covered in a sticky red liquid would help Bucky’s recovery, even if it was just juice.  
  
Amy’s heart melted a little. There was a reason she was putting herself through all this. Steve was an idiot. But he needed her help right now. “Look, just make sure he eats some more when he wakes up?”  
  
Steve sighed and lay back in the bed. He made a mental note that vulnerable middle of the night Amy, and cold light of day Amy weren’t always the same person. Why couldn’t things just be simple between them again? Like they had been when they had been dating.  
  
Bucky's hand slapped him in the face before curling into his hair. Steve closed his eyes and leaned into the touch. That was right. They had never been simple. They had just been able to ignore how complicated they were for a while.  
  
Steve rolled Bucky into his arms. Bucky was complicated too, but he thought they could figure it out. Kissing Bucky felt right. They fit together perfectly when they slept. They hadn’t fooled around more than kissing. But that could wait. Bucky wasn’t in the right place for much more than that.  
  
Steve kissed the back of Bucky’s neck and closed his eyes. Complicated wasn’t the end of the world. If anyone could figure out how to make this work, it was Amy and Bucky. The sound of Bucky’s breathing, and the feeling of his heartbeat under his hand lulled Steve into a half sleep. There was no rush. They had all the time in the world.  
  
He wasn’t sure how much time had passed when his new phone buzzed its text alert. He fumbled it off the nightstand. There was always the possibility that Tony needed them. Or that Amy wanted to talk.  
  
Nat: Family meeting. Living room. Twenty minutes.  
  
*****  
  
Amy lounged in her favourite armchair. She hoped whatever it was Natasha wanted to talk about wouldn’t take too long. She had things she wanted to do. Like visit the market. People needed to start getting used to her being around. And if most of the things she wanted to do also involved avoiding Steve and by extension Bucky until it was time for bed, well that was just a coincidence.  
  
“What exactly is this family meeting about?” Steve asked as he settled into the chair next to Amy's.  
  
Amy kept her eyes on her phone. There were ten other places to sit in this room. Why did he want to sit next to the one person who was pissed at him? “Maybe she wants to tell us something stupidly obvious and unhelpful. No wait, Nat wouldn’t steal your thing.”  
  
“Really? Now?” Steve looked at her incredulous. Maybe things weren’t all the way better. But she could at least avoid dragging everyone else into their fight. This was between the two of them… three of them, he mental amended. Amy was right. Bucky had a voice in all this too. Still. This wasn’t the time or place for them to start arguing again.  
  
Bucky considered the available seats. Sitting _on_ either Steve or Amy would probably be considered distracting. He didn’t want to sit on the couch alone. Everything else was too far away from his people. He settled on the floor between their chairs. Leaning against Amy’s legs, his feet on either side of Steve’s feet. If he reached up, he would be able to reach Steve’s hand without stretching.  
  
Amy’s hand automatically went to Bucky’s hair, combing through the soft locks. Bucky might be acting like his adorable cuddly self, but that wasn’t to go stop Amy’s being mad at Steve. If anything, it heightened her irritation. He had this sweet wonderful man who needed him. And he was still acting like they could just work out their differences and get back together. It wasn’t fair. “You’re right. I should have thought about the timing of what I had to say, and how it might affect those around me.”  
  
“What did Steve say?” Wanda asked curling her feet under her on the couch.  
  
Steve ground his teeth. She was trying to antagonise him now. It was probably a ploy to get him to 'leave her out of it’, and he hated to admit how well it was working just now. “Can we talk about this after we deal with whatever Nat thinks is important enough to call a family meeting for?”  
  
“I mean we can wait if you two want to have it out right now. I can make popcorn.” Natasha tossed a handful of files on the table before dropping into her own chair. She propped her feet on the edge of the table and rocked her chair onto its back legs. Steve and Amy finally having it out was something she wouldn’t mind watching. And someone should probably be on hand to referee so they didn’t _physically_ hurt each other.  
  
“Feet off the table.” Bucky scolded Natasha automatically. He looked up at Amy and Steve. If he was going to scold people he might as well go all in. “They aren’t going to fight. They are going to wait and talk about it like civilised adults. Right Stevie?”  
  
Steve softened, reaching down to pat Bucky’s leg affectionately. “Whatever you want Buck.”  
  
Amy squared her shoulders. She wasn’t going to fall for those sad grey eyes again. Or the pleading blue ones. “If I need to throttle Steve, I’m going to throttle Steve, and you can’t stop me.”  
  
“That’s probably true.” Bucky kissed her knee. Stubborn opinionated girl. He was more than a little infatuated with her. “Try?”  
  
Amy sighed. Maybe she was going to fall for those eyes again. “I will try, because you asked nicely.”  
  
“Great.” Steve sighed and rubbed his eyes. It sounded like that was the closest they were going to come to a truce. It would have to do for now. “Nat what is this about?”  
  
“There’s been a hiccup in the plan. Okoye and I had a talk about what happened while we were away. Some new details have come to light. Details that make me wonder if we are putting all our eggs in one basket.”  
  
“What do you mean more details? The two of you were talking to Shuri for the better part of an hour that first night. What could you have missed that is big enough to disrupt the plan?” Steve hated when they didn’t tell him things. How was he supposed to make informed decisions if he didn’t have all the information?  
  
Nat and Amy shared a quick silent argument about whether to tell Steve what had actually happened after they had returned to Wakanda. Amy emerged victorious. Natasha shrugged and continued without an explanation. “The plan relied on the fact that Wakanda was completely isolated. That’s not true anymore. An agent from the CIA has been here and helped stop the coup and the associated attacks on the rest of the world.”  
  
“Who?” Amy asked already running through a list of possibilities and everything she knew about each of them  
  
“Ross.” Nat said slumping just a little in her chair. Unless Amy's intelligence was drastically different from hers, Ross was squeaky clean. Irritatingly clean. The kind of clean that made it nearly impossible to turn someone.  
  
Sam blinked a few times. Ross. The CIA agent that had formally arrested them in Berlin. The CIA agent T'Challa had turned Zemo over to. The CIA agent who had it out for them… “Shit.”  
  
Nat looked away from Amy, her expression was still impassively smooth, not devious not triumphant. Which meant her intelligence was the same as Nat's or close enough. “My thoughts exactly. And since he did help save, Nakia, the Queen Mother, and Princess Shuri, the royal family feels there is a debt. They are talking about letting him open an embassy.”  
  
Steve clenched the first farthest from Bucky. That wasn’t good news. But the fact it wasn’t good was why Nat was bringing it up at all. “How bad is it.”  
  
“Not as bad as it could be.” Nat said reassuringly. She fished an internal State Department out of one of the files and slid it across the table towards Steve. “They're only willing to accept Ross. Terms would be the same as Amy’s official ones, so it would be him and maybe a staff of five, and no military. It looks like State is balking at the idea. There is no precedence for that kind of breach of protocol. And there are still standard negotiations to go through. We have at least a few months before the shit really hits the fan. There is a risk of personal visits in the meantime.”  
  
Amy drummed her nails against the screen of her phone. She didn’t like that their best defence was a mess of bureaucracy. “I have some contacts at State. I can see about sewing a little extra dissent there, but too much is suspicious.”  
  
“Which brings us back to eggs and baskets.” Bucky sighed reaching up to slip his hand into Steve’s.  
  
Nat nodded sharply. He was absolutely right, and she was willing to bet that if he thought about it, he would be able to figure out what her recommendation would be. “We should separate the two biggest threats.”  
  
Steve bristled. He did not like where this plan was going. “I’m not leaving Bucky.”  
  
“You’re not one of the two biggest threats.” Amy said coldly. “No one has ever brainwashed you into almost ending the world.”  
  
“You don’t think I should stay here.” Wanda said meeting Nat's eye sadly.  
  
Natasha’s heart felt like it was breaking. Wanda had been through so much in the last few months. Nat had promised herself when she turned herself over to S.H.I.E.L.D. that she would do everything in her power to protect children from being used the way she was. Wanda was evidence of how badly she had failed. She deserved better than to be uprooted again, there had been too much pain in her young life. “No dear, I don’t. They are going to pull out all the stops to find my _Otets_ , and the last thing I want is for them to find you too.”  
  
Steve ran his thumb over Bucky’s knuckles. Bucky’s hand in his felt like the only thing stopping him from falling. Nothing was simple, and he never had enough information. “What are our options for staying together?”  
  
“Not great. There is reason we ended up here in the first place. With Katsura off the table we’re down to…” She looked at Amy. A lot of the contingency plans had been hers. Nat had mostly focused on misdirection up until now. Too many of her contacts were known entities.  
  
“Venezuela or Borneo. Both have serious logistical issues of their own, most relevant to this conversation being, you would be effectively off grid, which isn’t ideal.” Amy said tersely She wanted to get up and pace, but Bucky was still leaning against her and she didn’t want to disturb him any more than this conversation was going to. Him disassociating now would be unhelpful. She settled for rolling her knife around her fingers.  
  
“You?” Bucky looked up at her concern creasing his forehead. She had definitely said ‘you’ not ‘we’. If they left, she had to come with them. He didn’t want to lose the little Fox, and he definitely didn’t want to see Steve’s face if they had to leave her.  
  
Amy stroked his hair back from his face. Her poor boy. He needed more stability in his life, not less. “It would be… difficult… for me to join you in either local without rousing suspicion.”  
  
Natasha pushed on before they got bogged down with what she personally thought was the worst plan. “If we split the party there are better options.”  
  
Steve sighed. Off grid wasn’t ideal. Apart from the damper it would put on their work, he didn’t love the idea of no medical facilities and no Amy. They might have to split up. “What is our option?”  
  
Natasha nodded to the files on the table. She’d spent the last few days working out the answer to that question. “Sam has an offer. A good one. We can place Wanda close by. We'll need airtight covers for both of them, which might take a little time to put together. Aims?”  
  
“Once we know what we need, I can get it. Digital is more of an issue.” Secure covers weren’t just about having the right physical documents these days. People needed a whole online presence, or they looked suspicious.  
  
Nat nodded. She had expected digital to be the weak spot in Amy’s abilities. “Shuri has already said she'll help with that.”  
  
Wanda bit her lip. There was an opportunity here. She would have to be bold if she wanted to take advantage of it. Bold the way Natasha had taught her to be. “Could… could my cover maybe be a university student?”  
  
Steve frowned at her. “We decided it was too dangerous for you to go to school.”  
  
Amy tapped her knife against her lips. “That actually might be part of what makes it a good idea. The others know about that decision. They know you’d never let her, so they won’t be looking there. It would also explain why she doesn’t have family in town and give her an excuse to leave at regular intervals without raising suspicion.”  
  
“Hold up.” Sam interrupted before Amy could snap and actually throttle Steve. “Is that even an option? Where is this offer.”  
  
“London.” Amy leaned back, pulling one foot onto the seat of her chair. “Brian offered to take you in.”  
  
Steve considered that idea. On the one hand he trusted Brian to protect Sam with his life. On the other hand... London. “Is that a good idea? London is heavy on surveillance.”  
  
Nat nodded at the files she had dropped in the table. “Dane’s wife, Falsa works IT for Scotland Yard. She can alter the meta data, so facial recognition won’t register them as Sam and Wanda. I’ll bounce around to make sure there are credible rumours in other locations.”  
  
Bucky squeezed Steve’s hand reassuringly. His little girl had worked hard on this plan and from where he was sitting it looked solid. “The heavily surveillance is also a flaw in their security. It makes them overconfident. They have so much data to sort through they can really only look for suspicious activity and anomalies. If you know what you’re doing, you can be basically invisible. I spent the better part of a month there last year.”  
  
“Okay.” Steve squeezed Bucky’s hand back. “Sam and Wanda move their primary residence to London. We'll need to talk about how they are going to stay in touch, but I agree to your premise.”  
  
*****  
  
Sam wondered if it was too soon to start packing. Probably, good as they were Amy and Nat would need time to put everything together. He could start deciding what he needed to take though. There was nothing to stop him from sorting the few possessions he had. That was a reasonable thing to do. He dumped all the clothes onto the bed and started organising them into piles.  
  
A delicately cleared throat made Sam look up.  
  
Amy stood in the door to Sam’s room holding out her phone. “I thought you might want to be the one to ask.”  
  
Sam blinked at her confused. “Ask?”  
  
Amy waggled her phone at him. “Ask your boyfriend if you can move in with him. Little weird if Nat and I do it for you.”  
  
Sam sat down before his knees could give out. He hadn’t actually considered that aspect of the plan. They had only ever talked about that kind of future in the broadest most speculative way. Neither of them had been willing to give up their jobs to move. That obstacle had been removed he supposed. But still it was a big step. What if they weren’t ready? What if they didn’t make it? “…I’m moving in with Brian…”  
  
“Freaking out a little?” Amy teased rubbing his back sympathetically. Poor Sam. This morning he had probably thought he would be stuck loving Brian from afar for the rest of his life. Now he was going to have to put up with the way he left half full cups of tea everywhere.  
  
Why wouldn’t they be able to make it? Brian loved him enough that he didn’t care that he was on the run from pretty much everyone. They had a shot. Sam was crazy if he didn’t go for it. “I’m moving in with Brian.”  
  
“Not if you don’t call him you aren’t.” Amy laughed and pressed the phone into Sam's hand. “Bring my phone back when you’re done.”  
  
Sam found the number he was looking for right away. CB🇬🇧-secure. His heart thundered in his chest. He was moving in with Brian.  
  
Brian answered on the second ring already spitting fire. “Aims. I swear to god if you are calling because you are having another existential crisis on the meaning of love, I will charter a plane and...”  
  
“Hi.” Sam whispered, smiling so wide his face hurt.  
  
“Flyboy?” Brian sounded breathless.  
  
Sam understood the feeling. He was a little overwhelmed too. Had it really only been a few weeks since they had seen each other? It felt like a lifetime since he’d heard that sexy accent.  
  
“It’s me.” Sam wished he could wrap his arms around his boy. “I’m so sorry Bri. You needed me and I…”  
  
“You will always do the right thing. Regardless of personal risk or political fallout. I could never be mad at you for being you.” Brian soothed. Sam could almost feel Brian’s hands cupping his face.  
  
He couldn’t wait for that feeling to be real. “So, I kind of need a place to stay for a while. Mind if I crash with you.”  
  
“I wouldn’t have it any other way.” Brian’s warm smile radiated down the phone line.


	31. Comfort Food and Questionable Ideas

Amy inhaled deeply. The entire suite smelled like home. Someone was making ramen. Real ramen. With pork belly and lots of fish sauce from the smell of it. Hesitantly Amy poked her head out of her room. There was no sign not Steve waiting to accost her. Not a trap then. She followed the sent towards the kitchen. Even if it was a trap, she would put up with a lot for a good bowl of ramen.  
  
*****  
  
Natasha was waiting in the kitchen watching an Indian reality show and stirring a large pot.  
  
Amy leaned against Natasha’s shoulder. The smell of Bonito broth bringing back waves of childhood memories. “I think I love you.”  
  
Nat laughed and bumped her head against her friends. “Think of it as my way of buttering you up before you murder Steve. I became a fugitive for that man. Although second time round is much more comfortable than the first. I hardly ever have to worry about rats here.”  
  
Amy perched herself beside the sink. She'd never been alone like Nat had been, but she’d spent her share of time in dilapidated safe house and hovels to maintain a cover. “If rodents were an issue, I'd see about having Ōjo brought out. Maybe I should anyway. It would give me someone to cuddle without feeling guilty.”  
  
Nat looked at her exasperated. Between Amy’s attempt at aloof distance, and Steve’s long pinning looks, Nat was over living in this soap opera. “There is no reason you should feel guilty about cuddling either of them. They both asked for it.”  
  
Amy shook her head. They didn’t know what they were asking for. “Neither of them is in the right emotional place for a no strings relationship.”  
  
Natasha snorted. “All your relationships had strings.”  
  
“True.” Amy twisted her hair off her neck and secured it with a stray hair elastic. “They were investments, neither of them currently has the kind of resources my usual trysts offer me.”  
  
Nat found it hard to be irritated with Amy. She understood her too well. “Steve would help you overthrow a moderately sized government, if you showed him they were corrupt and no longer had the People’s mandate.”  
  
Amy tossed her hands in the air. “What do I have to do to convince people I’ve never been the Belize?”  
  
Nat rolled her eyes. “Help me serve.”  
  
******  
  
Amy practically inhaled the fragrant soup, slurping the noodles down with chopsticks in one hand bowl in the other. The soft-boiled egg had been perfect. The bamboo shoots were crunchy and tangy. She felt warm and soothed to her very soul.  
  
Bucky set his chopsticks down to push his hair back again. He liked it long, but it did get in the way. He’d already dipped a chunk of it in his soup while he tried to tear his pork belly apart with his teeth. Steve was helping solve that little problem by cutting his meat into bite sized pieces.  
  
“Now you’re just trying to make me sad.” Amy sighed and set down her own bowl and utensils. She pulled the elastic out of her hair and fluffed it to remove the crease. She could watch him struggle or she could just fix the problem.  
  
She scraped the top half of Bucky’s hair into a ponytail. Doing her best to ignore the way he leaned into her touch. It was just because he had been touch-starved for so long.  
  
“Guess I’m still not used to only having one hand.” Bucky said, melting into the feeling of her fingers on his scalp. He could probably figure out how to tie it up one handed. But why would he when Steve or one of the girls would help him?  
  
“You say that like you had table manners before.” Steve leaned over and slid the newly cut up meat back into Bucky’s bowl.  
  
Amy’s heart did the somersault she was starting to expect from being around the two of them. They were so soft with each other. Just the way Bucky was smiling at Steve was enough to melt her heart. It was also a good reminder that he wasn’t the big bad wolf the intelligence community seemed to think he was these days. Something she was especially offended by considering how many of them had brushed of her reports on him in the past. “How was anyone ever afraid of you?”  
  
“I’m the deadliest assassin in a century.” Bucky slurped a long noodle that whipped around as the tail end cleared the bowl. “No one can catch me. I’m a ghost story.”  
  
“You’re not even the deadliest assassin in this room.” Amy snorted and picked up her bowl. She was going to need more of Natasha’s bribery soup. “And you have broth on you face.”  
  
*****  
  
Someone shouted in the living room, interrupting Bucky’s reading.  
  
Bucky set down his book. They were fighting again. It was like clockwork. Everything would tick along fine for a few day, Steve and Amy circling one another, it would look like maybe they were going to patch things up and make his life that much easier. Then one of them would do something that set the other off and they would start fighting against.  
  
He hated it. There had to be a way to get them to stop…  
  
A way to remind them that they loved each other…  
  
A way to make them remember…  
  
Of course. He should have thought of it sooner. There was a way to make them remember. Amy wasn’t the only one who could mess with people’s minds.  
  
*****  
  
“Hello Wanda.” Bucky smiled his most charming smile. There was nothing like a brilliant plan to perk you right up. “How would you like to help me solve a little problem?”  
  
Wanda almost spilled coffee all over her book. When she looked down, she had been alone. Now Bucky was less than three feet away. His silence was unnerving, no one that big should be that quiet. At least Steve occasionally sounded like he was breathing. Seriously Sam was the only one in the group who made a normal amount of noise. “Problem?”  
  
*****  
  
Steve had no idea how these arguments kept starting. One minute he was glaring down a Wardog that thought making a move on Amy was a good idea. Then next he was back in their rooms getting yelled at for being jealous and overprotective.  
  
Which was unfair. Okay, maybe he was a little jealous. But she was the one who had looked ready to rub against some guy like a cat the minute they promised to show her how the shield cloaks worked. He was sure she hadn’t missed the subtext in the comment about cloaks and protection.  
  
All he had done this time was wrap an arm around her shoulders. He in no way deserved a lecture at the level she was giving him.  
  
Amy was moments away from tearing her hair out. Or maybe clawing out his eyes. There was almost certainly a way to duplicate those personal force fields without vibranium. She had been so close to getting the kind of technical information that would be useful if she wanted to do that when he had pulled his caveman stunt. Not to mention how much it had undermined her repour building with the Wardogs. She needed these people to like her. They were an important faction to have on their side in case the council started second guessing sheltering Interpol and the CIA's most wanted. “If you keep pulling this shit I will…”  
  
Steve stepped closer to her. She wasn’t going to do anything and they both knew it. If she was going to leave, she would have done it already. “What Amy? What are you going to do? Admit that you still have feelings for me? Stop flirting with every vaguely attractive male that comes within ten feet of you? Are we in this together or not? You sleep around us. You’re constantly cuddling with Bucky. And don’t think I don’t see how you look at me and Bucky when you think we aren’t looking. So, are we in this together or not?”  
  
“Together? Together! You keep forgetting that _you_ broke up with _me_. That was your choice, not mine. Realistically, I shouldn’t be here at all.” Amy growled balling her hands into fists. Claw his eyes out. Definitely claw his eyes out.  
  
Steve took another step towards her. He knew he had messed up. But it was a fixable mistake. She was here. She slept in his bed every night. She was soft with Bucky and flirted back with him. They could figure something out if they just tried. “That was stupid of me. Let me try again. Come on Amy. I miss you.”  
  
Amy pushed against his chest. It was hard to remember all the reasons she was mad at him when he stood so close. And she was mad at him. She had every right to be mad at him. No amount of sad eyed looks and soft touches was going to change that. “I agree. It was stupid. But actions have consequences. This is yours. You wanted to break up, so we are broken up.”  
  
Steve blinked hard. Something was going on with his eyes. Hadn’t Amy been wearing workout gear a second ago? How had he not noticed that she was wearing the same coppery slip dress from last Christmas? And she was smiling now. The same radiant loving smile he remembered from their best days together. He should kiss her. Why wasn’t he kissing her already?  
  
Her lips were soft. So perfectly soft. Her hair like silk under his hand as he cupped the back of her head.  
  
Anger roared through him like a forest fire. Steve stumbled away from Amy. An icy shock hitting him as hard as the anger had.  
  
“WANDA!” Sparks rolled along Amy’s arms. Dripping from her hair and flashing out of her eyes. “I know when a thought isn’t my own.”  
  
Wanda edged into the living room. This had seemed like such a simple and obvious plan when it had been laid out for her. Now she was having some second thoughts on the matter. “I can explain?”  
  
“ _It’s not her fault. I talked her into it._ ” Bucky said in Japanese, stepping between Amy and the younger girl. Maybe he hadn’t thought this all the way through. Little Fox was only getting angrier.  
  
Amy’s powers sunk back into her skin. Her aura deflated leaving behind an icy calm. “ _I see Hydra took your manners along with your independent thought. Meddling with people's minds without permission is not acceptable behaviour._ ”  
  
Bucky shrugged. Her rage seemed to be ebbing into irritation, he could handle that. “ _Manners were something for the lazy and decadent West to waste time on. They made me more results oriented. How else was I going to get the two of you to cooperate?_ ”  
  
“ _We will discuss boundaries and consent later._ ” Amy replied tersely. Now was not the time to have this fight. Instead she rounded on Wanda again. There were other people who needed to learn more life and death lessons. Switching to English she growled in a voice dripping with ice. “And you. You want to mess with my mind. Mess with it. You. Me. Dojo. Now.”


	32. Wanda Messes With Amy's Mind

Wanda chewed her lip anxiously. She was never going to listen to anything Bucky told her again. Her quiet afternoon had somehow transformed into her standing unarmed in the middle of the Dojo while a very angry Amy carefully changed into full battle dress.  
  
Amy strapped a sword to her hip. It was time to find out just how much control Wanda actually had over her powers, and how much power the infinity stone had given her.  
  
“Are you sure this is a good idea?” Nat asked passing Amy one of her armguards.  
  
“Almost certain.” Amy replied calmly. She understood Nat’s concern, but really this should have been done ages ago. “No one has ever challenged her on this before.”  
  
“Yeah, because we’ve never encountered anyone who can stand up to her.” Nat grabbed Amy’s arm. Her friend wasn’t taking this seriously. When Steve had explained he had probably downplayed how bad it had been. “She dropped Thor, Aims.”  
  
Amy patted Natasha’s hand reassuringly. “I know. I also know, he saw the future when she did.”  
  
“He said himself he’s not sure it was the future.” Nat said flicking her eyes back towards Wanda. Amy had no idea what she was getting into. She still woke up with the aftereffects from her nightmare vision. “Curiosity will be the death of you.”  
  
“Or I’m about to save us all.” Amy smirked. So little faith. Amy seriously doubted anyone could mess up her mind as thoroughly as she had.  
  
Nat sighed and raised her hands in surrender. “It’s your head.”  
  
Amy squared her shoulders. Across the room Wanda shifted nervously. Amy crooked two fingers at her. It was time to start.  
  
A wave of red fire washed over Amy. The dojo disintegrated around her.  
  
*****  
  
Red tinged shadows shrouded the edges of room, concealing any identifying detail. Amy’s feet were rooted to the spot wherever she was.  
  
“Sweet little bird. Come back and be my good girl. I know you can be good. You just have to try harder. You never tried hard enough.” A dark voice Amy knew too well echoed out of the shadows.  
  
Jun’ichi steeped forward. Scared face twisted in an evil smile. To think she had once found him entrancing.  
  
Amy snuffed out the spark of panic that bloomed in her chest with cold calculating ease. He couldn’t hurt her anymore. She didn’t need to be afraid of him or the personal failings he represented.  
  
“Oh you poor fool. You aren’t what I’m here for at all.” Amy ran her sword through the man she had thought she loved. The corps explode in a cloud of bubbles.  
  
Amy was surprised. The shadowy room didn’t dissolve with him. Her mind must not be done with this fear yet.  
  
Two bulky forms loomed behind her. Amy refused to turn around. She knew who it was, and she didn’t want to deal with the implication of their presence in this vision. “I’m not here for you either."  
  
The rest of the world exploded.  
  
Shards swirled until they reformed into the throne room in Tokyo. Amy found herself on the dais standing next to the left arm of Chrysanthemum throne. The walls of the room fell away. The roof blew off, torn away by the storm raging around the room.  
  
Beyond the boundaries an army roiled. Faceless and bristling with weapons. The roar of the crowd muffled by the roar of the storm.  
  
The world shook. The sky burned. The throne stayed empty. A dragon rolled out of the clouds. Huge and burning under his scales. The world snake.  
  
A tiny smirk twitched the corner of Amy’s mouth. Now that was more like it. She knew her fears had gotten more interesting when she had turned her collar. This was a fear worthy of a goddess.  
  
Amy shifted her grip on her sword. Fear was good fear was your body reminding you that you were alive. The dead had no fear. The important thing was not to let it paralyse you.  
  
Amy had already died. She wasn’t in a hurry to do it again. Something tickled at the back of Amy’s eyes. The vision trying to pull back.  
  
The dragon landed. Claws sinking deep into the broken stones in front of her. Amy released her grip on the back of the throne. This was an old trick she knew exactly what to do here. She closed her hand around her sword hilt and brought the blade up to guard position.  
  
Behind the dragon the army surged. Amy’s smile grew. Let them come. A bright-eyed Fox was never really alone. She couldn’t see them, but she could feel her family. Strong hearts backing hers holding her up when the world pushed in.  
  
The dragon sunk his claws deeper into the dirt and _pulled_.  
  
The earth shattered. Huge crevasses opened between Amy and her enemies. Amy grabbed the back of the throne again as the ground around her crumbled into nothingness.  
  
Throne first everything else second.  
  
The rocks under the dragon splintered sending the beast careening into the endless blackness along with his army.  
  
More of the floor around Amy crumbled. Leaving her standing on the barest ledge of rock, hand firmly on the back of a throne that teetered half off the edge.  
  
Above the fires in the sky dimmed and went out revealing start and spaceships. One by one the ships engines sputtered out and they crashed into the yawning voids around her. Stars started to wink out. Some flared and went supernova taking their neighbours with them. Some just faded to black. Half the sky going dark.  
  
Some pinpoints of light shone bright and even out of the inky blackness. Deep in her heart Amy knew that they represented others holding strong like she was.  
  
The vision crumbled into tiny fragments and blew away.  
  
Eight pairs of bright purple eyes regarded Amy coolly from the depths of her mind. Her Aunts and Grandmother had seen. They would figure out what to do with the new information.  
  
*****  
  
Amy gagged and choked, her knees hitting the floor as she came back to her senses. She had the answer to some of her questions. But this little adventure had raised a whole lot more. She was going to need to meditate on this.  
  
“Well that was interesting.” Natasha said blandly handing Amy a bottle of ginger tonic.  
  
“Could you see?” Amy swigged from the bottle. The spicy sweetness coating her dry mouth.  
  
“No, you were sparking, and your eyes were glowing. Wanda could see.” Nat nodded across the room to where Wanda was slumped against the wall. “You freaked her out. She couldn’t break the connection.”  
  
“And I thought Tony’s nightmares were bad.” Wanda mumbled sliding into a sitting position.  
  
Amy sat back on her heels pulling herself into a dignified kneeling position. “Tony’s vision is limited by his experiences. I have no such hindrance.”  
  
“You used the hive mind?” Nat asked. That would explain why Amy was handling it so well. She hadn’t been trapped in her own mind. She’d had the strength of the other Foxes to draw on.  
  
“I had to if I wanted to see anything new. Little girl is 2/3 of an infinity stone all on her own.” Amy cracked her neck. Even with the hive mind backing her up she felt like crap.  
  
“Learn anything interesting from your little experiment?” Nat still didn’t approve. There had to be a better way to find the extent of Wanda’s powers.  
  
“Wanda thinks I’m cute.” Amy said rocking to her feet. She wouldn’t have been able to hold Wanda for so long if she didn’t.  
  
Nat raised her eyebrows. If that was all they had discovered this had definitely been pointless and needlessly dangerous. “Anything else?”  
  
“They’re getting closer.” Amy flexed her fingers. Whispers and rumours from across the universe were starting to make sense. The planets were aligning. Amy hated destiny.  
  
Nat bit the inside of her cheek. That didn’t sound good. The dangers facing their world had been getting progressively worse. Some of that was just humans getting better at causing chaos, the Stark affect as she called it in her head. Large parts of it were coming from outside. Nat had a horrible vision of animals fleeing before a forest fire. They might be in real trouble.  
  
Amy rubbed her jaw. Wanda would be fine, and there was nothing she could do about the larger problem tonight. “Gods, you really feel it in the molars, don’t you?”  
  
Natasha rolled her eyes. “Personally, I felt it all over. My nightmare sent me into a panic attack that it took Clint’s kids to snap me out of.”  
  
“Why couldn’t I stop it?” Wanda’s voice was a little shaky as she looked up at the other women from he place on the floor.  
  
“Your power wants to get out. It wants to play with the fabric of the universe. I used that against you. Not everyone is weak minded and untrained. You need to be prepared for that.” Amy explained helping Wanda to her feet.  
  
“Did you learn a lesson about using your powers on allies without permission?” Natasha asked. Amy’s method may have been unorthodox, but it was a lesson Wanda needed to learn. If you didn’t get permission from people you needed to trust you before you did things that would affect them, they would stop trusting you. And then you were in trouble. If some of the other people in her life had learned that lesson, they wouldn’t be topping the FBI and Interpol's most wanted lists right now.  
  
“Yes ma'am.” Wanda said sheepishly.  
  
“Good then go.” Nat stepped aside so Wanda could make a break for the door without having to go around her and Amy. Let her go think about what had happened for a while.


	33. Babysitting

Nat rapped sharply on Wanda’s door frame. The timing on this was truly awful. That was their lives though. A series of horrible events happening at the exact worst time. For most people when it rained it poured. For them, when it rained, they built an ark or they drowned.  
  
“I don’t need a lecture. I shouldn’t have done it. I know that.” Wanda said laying on her back on her bed. Whatever Amy had done to stop her breaking their mental connection had left her with a massive headache.  
  
“Good. I’ll skip the lecture and get straight to the point. Something’s come up, we’ve got a mission. Steve and Sam are gearing up now.” The ten rings were acting up again. With Tony and Rhody still out of commission, thanks to their injuries and the exact UN bureaucracy Steve had been worried about, someone had to stop them from kidnapping and recruiting a new batch of civilians.  
  
“Where are we going?” Wanda asked sitting up. She was ready. Wherever they were going she could bounce back before they got there.  
  
“We are on our way to a small town outside Baghdad. You are staying here. Amy has to leave too. You get to babysit Bucky.” Nat said evenly. Wanda would probably feel like being left behind was some kind of punishment. The truth was more complicate. Bucky wasn’t stable enough for them to leave him alone. Wanda was one of the only people who could reliably stop him with out killing him if things went really wrong. They couldn’t risk Wanda getting captured. And yes. There was a small element of penalisation. Wanda needed time to fully absorb her lesson.  
  
“What! That isn’t fair.” Wanda wanted to make up for what she’d done. She wanted to work.  
  
“You’re right. It isn’t.” Nat patted her cheek sympathetically. “Use the time to finish your university application, you need to have one for your cover. And don’t let him out of your sight for too long.”  
  
Wanda slumped back onto her bed. She couldn’t believe she was stuck on babysitting duty. Bucky was harmless. He blacked out occasionally, but anyone could check on him every couple of hours. She had skills. She could be useful. What if they needed crowd control or something? No one else could hold people the way she could.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky shifted awkwardly in the door to Amy’s room. She’d disappeared after whatever had happened in the dojo. Wanda and Natasha had both been quiet about what had happened. Steve hadn’t asked him to check on her, but he had definitely looked at her door with a certain level of desperation on his way out. Plus, Bucky felt responsible for whatever state she was in. The way Steve had explained it she would be in rough shape.  
  
“I know you’re there.” Amy didn’t look up from the armour she was inspecting. _Sode_ were probably a bad choice. More likely to provoke aggression than provide protection. This would require finesse. Her geisha face, not the Fox Demon. Although she would be wearing her spider silk _haori_ over whatever outfit she chose. Something fireproof and stab resistant would be very welcome.  
  
Bucky cleared his throat. Her perception obviously hadn’t been affected. “I want to apologise.”  
  
“Yeah?” Amy snorted. These boys and their apologies. “Are you better at that than your boyfriend?”  
  
Whatever had happened the little Fox didn’t seem _too_ badly shaken. A little brisk and slightly distracted, but she seemed to have come through in one piece. “I have more experience at it.”  
  
Amy sighed and turned to face him. The least painful solution to this conversation was to do it herself. Story of her life. “You don’t like when we yell. You thought you had a way to remind us that we don’t hate each other. Your intentions were good. Your execution left something to be desired.”  
  
Bucky opened his mouth silently a few times. That did pretty much sum up everything he had wanted to say. Her wording was little... Sterile, but she’d hit the main points. He didn’t know why she’d explained his apology. In his experience women liked when you groveled a little. But then Ayame wasn’t exactly a typical member of her sex. “I want both of you to be happy, but it was wrong to try and force your minds to do something without your permission. I should know that better than anyone.”  
  
“You are forgiven. But do keep in mind I’m not usually one for second chances.” Amy went back to choosing appropriate swords. She didn’t have time to put anything new together, which limited her options.  
  
“I'll try not to disappoint you again.” Bucky watched her sheath and unsheathe swords with familiar ease. When she was tucked against his side in bed, it was hard to remember that she was the same girl who had almost managed to take down the Winter Soldier alone on a roof in Prague. When she was standing in front of him appraising weapons like she’d been born with a blade in her hand, it was hard to imagine how she’d failed. “You’re kind of scary when you want to be, aren’t you?”  
  
“Most people think I’m kind of scary all the time.” Amy said selecting a set of swords with a _sukehiro_ pattern etched on the blades. The hilts were wrapped in olive green at the moment which complicated picking what she was going to wear with them, but they were the best set she had ready.  
  
“And Wanda… she’s….” Bucky was trying to get used to the idea of not being the most dangerous person in the room. He didn’t think he liked it.  
  
Amy leaned against the rack so she could get a better look at Bucky. “Bucky baby, I’m going to tell you a secret. I am a goddess, raised by other goddess, I have seen things you would not believe, things that would keep you up at night.”  
  
“Not hard, I don’t like to sleep, at least not without you and Steve there.” Bucky said. He kind of wished the dangerous girl would stop whatever she was doing and let him properly apologise. With eye contact and soft kisses or at least a hug.  
  
Amy glared at him for interrupting, but she knew there was no real ice to it. “But the amount of raw power that girl has terrifies me.”  
  
Bucky nodded. He was starting to understand that. He hadn’t considered why Steve and Nat avoided talking about the details of how they met Wanda. He knew why now. Steve had explained while he paced and waited to see what happened. The worry in his shoulders said more than his words. Steve had been worried that Amy, beautiful fierce Amy, would break under what Wanda could show her.  
  
Amy sighed. She couldn’t stay mad at him. Not when he had pushed her into finding out what her family needed to know. Her grandmother had contacted her an hour ago, just before Steve and Nat had left, confirming all her fears. And giving Amy a mission to complete. One her fealty to her family demanded she drop everything for. The throne of Nipon must not fall. That meant they needed to topple another throne. Amy had to sow the seeds that would topple it. No matter how much she hated the idea.  
  
Bucky settled against the wall. He didn’t want to be alone. Steve and Nat were gone. If Amy wasn’t mad, this was where he should be.  
  
He pulled a knee into his chest as he watched Amy move around the room. This was the little Fox's natural habitat. She was more graceful stalking between racks of weapons than most women were gliding around a dance floor in a ball gown.  
  
It took Bucky a minute to realise that Amy wasn’t just inspecting and sorting her gear. Only one set of anything was going into the bag at her feet. One long sword. One short. One set of throwing knives. One dagger as long as his forearm. Two flat blades that would sit against her thighs under whatever she was wearing. One set of arm guards. One chest guard. She was packing.  
  
“You’re leaving.” Not just leaving. Based on what she was packing she was on her way to battle.  
  
Amy checked the blade on a tanto before rejecting it and grabbing another. “I’ll be back before Steve and Nat are. Stay out of trouble. Don’t worry, Wanda can drop you if you lose control again.”  
  
“Will it be dangerous?” Bucky studied the set of her shoulders. Proud and determined. Whatever she was going to do she wasn’t scared. At least, she wasn’t so scared she couldn’t hide it.  
  
“Negotiating with people you’ve been to war with generally is.” Amy said dismissively.  
  
Bucky hooked the strap of her bag around his wrist and pulled it towards him. He unpacked the weapons, ignoring the armour. Little Fox was going to be in danger. Amy wasn’t a brute like Steve. Her best defence was a good offence. He lined the blades up in front of him.  
  
Carefully he picked up each one, inspected it from end to end. If he was satisfied, he put it back in the bag. He set aside two of the throwing knives. They were sharp. Not sharp enough.  
  
Amy turned around with a whetstone in her hand. “What are you doing?”  
  
“Checking everything is sharp.” Bucky touched his thumb to the edge of the tanto. Sharp enough to slice a hair end to end. She knew her way around a blade.  
  
“And?” Amy crossed her arms over her chest. Was he doubting her weapons care?  
  
Bucky reached up to take the whetstone from her and sharpen the rejected throwing knives. His little Fox wouldn’t go into battle with anything less than razor sharp if he had a say. “They’ll do.”  
  
Amy tipped her head curiously as he ran the stone over the edge of her throwing knife, the hilt braced under his knee. He wasn’t doubting her. He was worrying about her. Steve’s sweet darling Bucky was worrying about her. Because Steve was already in danger? Or because he cared about her in her own right? It was impossible to tell. It made her feel warm either way.  
  
Bucky slid the throwing knives back into their sheath. That was as safe as he could make her right now. His little Fox was fierce, she was smart, she would be alright. He didn’t know what they would do if something happened to her. Or what Steve would do. He looked up to find her studying him with soft contemplative eyes. “Come here for a second?”  
  
Amy sat down next to him. She would need to leave soon, but she could take a minuet to reassure him first.  
  
Bucky wrapped his arm around her waist and dragged her into his lap. There was a time when he would have gone with her. When he would have been able to look after this girl, who did so much to look after him, and who Steve loved so much. He tucked his face against her neck and took a few deep breaths. He couldn’t do that anymore. He had to trust that the people he cared about could look after themselves.  
  
Amy tucked his hair behind his ear. She wouldn’t leave him right now if she had a choice. He was still so fragile. The last few weeks of calm had helped, but it wouldn’t take much for him to back slide. There hadn’t been any big dramatic breakdowns recently, but he’d been losing time in the evening fairly regularly. “Are you going to be alright? Wanda is here if you need her.”  
  
Bucky returned the gesture, running his fingers through her long ebony hair. He was going to miss her while she was away. “Come back, okay?”  
  
Amy kissed his forehead softly. “You won’t even notice I’m gone.”


	34. Filial Duty

Amy sat calmly at Brian’s dining room table. A small mirror propped in front of her as she carefully applied something in the family of traditional geisha makeup. She’d opted for pale translucent foundation rather than stark white.  
  
On the other side of the table Brain and Dane sat dumbstruck by the plan she had spent the last two hours explaining.  
  
“Amaterasu wants us to what?” Dane finally spat.  
  
“Me.” Amy corrected, painting her eyelids blood red. “She wants me to return the crown.”  
  
Brian pursed his lips. It sounded easy when you ignored the details. There were some important details. “The crown that your family stole from _Oden_. The crown that my family has been keeping safe for close to _two centuries_. The crown that, if he gets it back, Surtur will use to destroy the home of some of the most powerful old gods. That crown?”  
  
“It’s like you’re trying to make it sound like a bad idea.” Amy smudged pigment into her cheeks.  
  
Brian banged his head on the table. “It says a lot that moving in with the most wanted people in the world is the second most dangerous plan you’ve come up with this year.”  
  
Amy sharpened the points of her eyeliner’s wings. “This isn’t my plan. It is my great grandmother’s plan. Are you going to help or not?”  
  
“I feel the need to reiterate that point about destroying the home of the gods.” Dane said drumming his fingers on his knee.  
  
Amy glared at him around the mirror. Did he seriously think this didn’t feel like a massive betrayal on her end? “They are gods. They will--“  
  
“They will either survive or they didn’t deserve the title.” Brian finished before she could. He'd heard it before. Ayame had been saying it since she first earned her nickname. She was a goddess. She had survived. Now she was going to kill other gods. Maybe not directly, but she would be the reason they died. “That is cold considering your relationship with at least one of them.”  
  
Amy had the grace to look ashamed. She had argued for filling Thor in on the plan. She had been emphatically overruled. “She specifically forbade me from warning him.”  
  
“Why does the Lady of the Lake want this done?” Dane sounded like he was in physical pain.  
  
“She said it was time. That’s all I know and all I want to know.” Amy checked he edges in the mirror. Questioning her Great Grandmother’s plans was a good way to make her reconsider whether you were expendable or not.  
  
Brian rubbed his temples. At his side his sword stirred, the power within eager to take on a quest. “Get your gear Dane. We’re going to Muspelheim.”  
  
*****  
  
There were few things that made Amy as anxious as waiting for the door of a strange throne room to open. She'd done it a handful of times on earth, there weren’t that many throne rooms left on that planet. She’d done it twice before now for her Great Grandmother, always with her aunts, always as the most junior member of the delegation. Once on Sakaar, where they had been greeted as old friends by the Grandmaster and she had spent two days lounging around looking elegant and drinking exotic cocktails. Once on Knowhere, where the collector had groveled at their feet and professed his loyalty to the Sun Goddess while her Grandmother and Auntie Sakura had checked the security measures, he had put in place around the Reality Stone.  
  
Today she wasn’t visiting an old ally to the family. She wasn’t shielded by her Grandmother or even her Aunts. She was the leader of their little delegation. And they were about to walk into the dragon’s lair.  
  
“I do not want to be here.” Dane muttered behind her. He and Brian were both wearing shiny armour and tunics with a sun burst embroidered on them. They looked ridiculous. Standing here with a huge chest between them like legendary knights of old.  
  
“And I want a full retinue as befits my station. No one is happy about this.” Amy said tossing her hair. It had been bleached white by the portal they had used to travel here. She didn’t know if that was just the power of the energy used to transport them running through her, or if her Great Grandmother had done it deliberately because she didn’t approve of Amy continually dying it black. She also didn’t have time to worry about that right now. She had a role to play. Today in this place, she wasn’t Amy, or Ayame, not the ninja assassin, or the princess, definitely not the reclusive academic. She was Amaterasu’s child. She was a bright star in the sky. She was a goddess.  
  
“Focus.” Brian snapped his hand on Excalibur’s hilt. “We get in. We give him the crown. We get out. No complications. No one gets hurt.”  
  
It felt like an eternity before the doors swung open. Pushed by beasts that looked like dogs made from volcanic ash.  
  
Amy smoothed her grey patterned kimono with its red and gold obi. She shifted her grip on her naginata. Game time.  
  
On the other side of the door a vast cavern stretched. The ceiling and most of the floor bristling with jagged stalactites and stalagmites. Chains spider webbed through the air, supporting rusty cages dangling from the ceiling. A roughhewn path cut down the centre, leading inexorably towards a huge stone throne set on a low stone platform.  
  
A giant of a man sat on the throne. Skin like cooling magma. Tongues of flame licking out of cracks anytime he moved. Across his knees lay a huge broadsword. The blade made of shimmering flame.  
  
“The last time any of my people faced the Foxes they died in droves. Now you dare to walk into my hall as if we are old friends. Speak quickly. Before I decide to take revenge for my servants' deaths.” His voice boomed, filling the dark space.  
  
Amy wasn’t about to let bluster and hot air shake her. That sort of thing was the same on any planet. And as he pointed out, the last time she had faced his forces, she had killed his dragon. “Her ladyship Amaterasu sends a gift.”  
  
Amy nodded to the boys. Moving as one, Brian and Dane flipped open the lid of their chest. Inside was an iron crown shaped like arching horns.  
  
Surtur leaned forward in his chair. Obviously interested. “The Sun does not see into this hall. What is there to stop me from taking my revenge and the gift you bring me?”  
  
“My Grandmother is always watching.” Amy ignored the fact that watching and helping were two very different things. Amaterasu could be capricious, even when you were acting as her agent. Instead she shifted her naginata. The blade caught the fire light and glowed blood red. “The Sun will shine on you again, Surtur. Never doubt it.”  
  
There was a long silence while the flaming man considered her words. All three of them remained perfectly still. Waiting.  
  
*****  
  
Brian slumped into his favourite armchair. They had walk into hell… and they had just walked back out. There hadn’t been a fight. He hadn’t even drawn his sword. It was the transit that had exhausted all of them. A kind of quick and dirty portal that felt like being electrocute, but got the job done. “That actually worked.”  
  
“I can’t believe that actually worked.” Dane said voice muffed by the couch he was sprawled face down on.  
  
Amy stretched out on the floor in a patch of sunlight. Her head was spinning and she still had to make it back to Wakanda. This whole charade taken two days, she was anxious to get back to Bucky and find out how Steve’s mission had gone. “My plans usually do.”  
  
Dane turned his head towards Ayame. “Hey goddess?”  
  
Amy draped an arm across her face. “Yeah Black Knight?”  
  
“How do you get us into these situations?”  
  
“I have no fucking clue.”  
  
All three of them dissolved into laughter. The tension, not just from the day, but from everything that had happened over the last few months, melted away. Amy felt twenty again. The world was ridiculous. Too small and too big all at the same time. But it was her world and she would protect it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Little surprise for you all tomorrow. Another First Avenger's era prequel. This one's a little different, but I think you'll like it.


	35. Further Complications

Amy and Natasha had probably though Bucky would stay in his room while they were gone, maybe move to the living room during the day. Bucky disagreed with that plan. The inactivity and silence in the suite was driving him crazy. He was used to being busy. At least when the suite was full there was always someone to talk to or observe. Wanda had barely emerged to eat and when she had she’d been surly and standoffish. Not that he entirely blamed her, it was definitely his fault that she was in trouble with the girls and probably also his fault that she’d been left behind. Still he couldn’t sit still. He needed to find something useful to do. Preferably around other people. Being treated like a human helped him remember that he was.  
  
The exact situation he was in just now wasn’t helping with that as much as he had hoped. Bucky blinked at the spear aimed at his throat. Which he understood. The Dora were jumpy around him, that was to be expected. He should have made more noise on his way into the basement lab. “I would have knocked, but the door is missing….”  
  
There was a clattering noise as Shuri emerged from under a workstation trailing wire. “My favourite former popsicle! Come in! How are you? How are things in the embassy suite after that…” She waved her hands to indicate Steve and Ayame’s fight.  
  
“Quiet.” Bucky edged around an overturned table. “It’s just me and Wanda up there right now. And she’s sulking because Aims gave her spanking she doesn’t think she deserved.”  
  
Shuri cleared her throat to avoid making a comment about _that_. He probably didn’t mean a literal spanking. “I’ve been down here cleaning up too much. I didn’t realise everyone had left.”  
  
“Sorry about that.” Bucky said guiltily shifting away from a smashed chair.  
  
“Oh. No.” Shuri waved away his apology and reattached a monitor. “Most of this wasn’t your fault. Didn’t they tell you? We had another issue while you were out.”  
  
“Still.” Bucky shrugged. Nat and Amy had said something over dinner the first night they had all been in the suite, he hadn’t been paying attention. He’s been leaning against Steve trying to figure out how to eat spaghetti with only one hand. “Anything I can do? It will help fend off cabin fever.”  
  
Shuri considered for a moment. She had bins full of screws that had spilled and mixed together. They needed to be sorted by size and style. “How do you feel about mindless repetitive tasks?”  
  
Bucky grinned. “love them.”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky flicked absently at a screw. Maybe a mindless repetitive task hadn’t been the right choice. Too much room for thinking. He didn’t like being left behind. He had thought helping the princess in her lab would help distract him. It wasn’t working. Steve was off putting himself in danger. _Ryzhiy_ was off putting herself in danger. Even the little Fox was in danger... Probably, she'd been vague about the exact nature of her reasons for leaving... Not that it really mattered. He knew them her well enough to know that she wouldn’t have abandoned him to have a tea party or something, she was bound to be getting into trouble. And he was stuck here. Sorting screws.  
  
Shuri slid her chair across the room. The back of the chair bumping against the edge of his table. “You are like the most depressing thing I have ever seen. Seriously you look like a puppy that got kicked into a puddle.”  
  
Bucky shrugged. “Not a fan of getting left behind. That’s all.”  
  
“Really?” Shuri asked surprised. “My brother had his money on you not being entirely okay with the fact your best friend hooked up with your ex.”  
  
Bucky frowned and looked up from his work. “Natasha _Kroshka_ and Steve have never dated. At least I don’t think they have. And she is my daughter, not my ex.” That thought at least could still make him smile. His little girl. All grown up and free. “She used to be the tiniest scrap of a thing. All fight and no sense of scale...”  
  
“Not Natasha.” Shuri rolled her eyes. “ _Ayame._ Come on. We all see the way she looks at the two of you. And Steve is obviously guilty about something involving both of you.”  
  
“Nah. That’s… the two of them having their own problems.” Bucky flicked another screw. It would almost be easier if that was all it was. Steve and the little Fox couldn’t seem to decide if they wanted to kill each other or kiss each other. He knew which side he came down on, but he wasn’t sure the world would be okay with him kissing both of them at the same time. Even if he was allowed to kiss Steve now. “Aims and I have a history but not that kind.”  
  
Shuri leaned forward intently. There was some juicy gossip there. “Then what kind?”  
  
Bucky’s lips curled up wryly. Little Fox was an enigma, he liked that about her. “The kind where I tried to kill her, pushed her off a moving train, and she still saved us.”  
  
Shuri’s eyes went wide. “You tried to kill Ayame by pushing her off a train?”  
  
Bucky shook his head. “Separate incidents. Pushing her off a train would be a terrible way to kill a Fox.”  
  
Shuri ran through several variations of the other questions she wanted to ask. They all sounded ridiculous or passive aggressive. She wanted answers, not to upset him. She could wait. Natasha or Ayame would be able to help her once they got back. They were both so viciously sharp and quick on their feet, like the Dora. She knew she could trust them, and they would help. She still wanted answers.  
  
They worked in silence for a while. Shuri bent over his table helping him sort.  
  
Bucky poured a sorted handful back into their container. “Just ask.”  
  
Shuri drew a pattern in the mess in front of her. “Would you have killed my father? If that madman had found you first and done… whatever it is he did to you in Berlin, would you have killed him?”  
  
Bucky toyed with a screw. “I wouldn’t have had a choice. I’ve never really be able to resist when they use the command words. I can only think of two times when I did anything other than what they ordered me too. Once when they told me _Ryzhiy_ had escaped and they wanted me to go after her… I hurt a lot of people that day. And I probably still would have gone after her if they had doubled down on the order instead of putting me back in the freezer. The fact I love her didn’t even slow me down the next time I ran into her. Thank god she is as good as she is.”  
  
“And the second time?”  
  
“Was Steve… he…” Bucky’s voice caught. ‘with you till the end of the line.’ It had been his way of confessing his love to Steve. A way to promise to spend the rest of his life looking after the little punk that had stolen his heart so thoroughly. No one was supposed to know what it meant. And Steve had said it back. “Steve has always been able to get through to me…”  
  
They fell back into silence. A more thoughtful one this time. Shuri turning over the things he had told her. She liked to consider facts carefully before categorising them.  
  
Bucky leapt to his feet. A familiar sharp pain was blooming behind his left eye. He shoved away from the table. He shouldn’t have left the suite. He stumbled towards the door, darkness biting at the edges of his vision.  
  
He could hear the Dora scrambling to contain him. Yelling at one another and at Shuri to stay clear of him. Good. They would keep her safe from him. He didn’t want to hurt anyone. He tried to move towards them, away from the kind princess. His limbs didn’t seem to be working.  
  
“Don’t be stupid.” Small hands shoved the small of his back, tipping him away from the wall of tools he had stumbled into. “He's having a seizure.”  
  
He landed on something soft. After that everything went black for Bucky. No more sound or light made it past the wall of pain.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky’s eyes felt like they were full of sand. The light above him was blinding. A head of wavy hair moved closer, blocking out some of the brightness. “Wanda?”  
  
“Oh, thank god.” She sounded overwhelmingly relived. “I don’t know which one of them would kill me first if something happened to you while they were all away.”  
  
“ _Ryzhiy_ , Steve and Ayame would be too busy getting mad at each other for leaving me in the first place. Oww.” Bucky rubbed the back of his head. He hurt all over. “Who did I hurt.”  
  
“No one. You just had a seizure.”  
  
“Really? Hu. Wonder how many of those I’ve had. Feels the same from this side.” Bucky pushed himself into his elbow. Someone had carried him back to their suite. Even tucked him into bed.  
  
They had put him on the wrong side of the bed though. Steve slept on the right side, closest to the door. Bucky slept on the left, by the window. That was the side any real threats would come from. Or maybe he slept in the middle and Amy slept on the left. That was normally where she ended up, with her head pillowed on the ruins of his ruined shoulder. The way she disappeared made ‘her’ spot harder to define.  
  
Bucky was having a hard time making out exactly what Wanda was talking about. Her voice kept fading in and out. “…Scan…. Reprogram…. Steve and Amy…”  
  
A distant part of his brain told him he was focusing on irrelevant details to stop himself from freaking out. He told that part of his brain to shut up. It was working.  
  
Wanda’s voice faded back in. He tried to make out what she was saying. It sounded important. “… if you actually wear the Kimoyo beads she gave you; she can program an alarm to go off before you have another one so you can try and make sure you’re on something soft. She also says you’re welcome to come back to the lab and help sort the bins of screws you knocked over.”  
  
“She’s a good kid.” Bucky gave up on trying to sit up and let himself sink back into the pillows. “Tell her I'll wear the bracelet.”  
  
“And the brain scans?” Wanda asked worriedly.  
  
Bucky closed his eyes. Phantom lights crowded around him, the memory of pain shooting through him. “I can’t handle scans right now.”  
  
“Okay. I can tell her that too.” Wanda pulled her knees up to her chest.  
  
Bucky shifted deeper into the softness warmth of the bed. He was so tired, and the blanket smelled like Steve, with just a hint on Amy on the pillows. It was hard to keep his eyes open. “I think I’m going to sleep for a while.”  
  
“But you’re alive?” Wanda was still worried about him. He was nice, Natasha and Steve both loved him, he didn’t deserve to die.  
  
Bucky smiled without opening his eyes. “Yeah kiddo. I’m alive.”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky didn’t wake up again until the next morning. He opened his eyes to find Steve asleep next to him. He stirred sleepily like he sensed Bucky was awake.  
  
“Hey.” Bucky cupped Steve’s face, running his thumb along his jaw. “What time did you get in?”  
  
Steve kissed the tip of his nose. Eyes still heavy with sleep. “About three. No Amy?”  
  
Bucky sighed. That side of the bed was cold and empty. He missed the feeling of Amy’s small form nestled between his shoulders. “She wasn’t back when I went to sleep. That doesn’t mean much. You know she’s weird about coming to bed without an invitation.”  
  
Steve ran his hand through Bucky’s hair. He understood where Amy was coming from. Even if he didn’t agree. “She doesn’t want to intrude.”  
  
“She’s not intruding.” Bucky frowned. “Do you think she’s intruding? Did you tell her that?”  
  
“No. Bucky. God.” Steve flopped back in the bed. That was the opposite of what he’d told her. “I love the girl. I want her here all the time.”  
  
Bucky took a deep breath and nuzzled into Steve’s chest. He’d missed his boy and his too big heart. “We should check her room. We can all eat breakfast together at least.”  
  
Steve kissed the top of his head. Breakfast was a good idea. He and Amy needed to have a conversation. “Yeah. Let’s see.”  
  
*****  
  
The door to Amy’s room was closed which it hadn’t been yesterday. Bucky let out a breath he wouldn’t admit to holding and pulled Steve down the hall towards it.  
  
The door opened before either of them could knock. Amy stood there wrapped in one of her silk robes, this one patterned with leaves falling into water. Steve knew that robe. He had peeled it off her a few times when he’d visited her last fall. The robe was definitely not the most striking thing about her this morning though.  
  
Bucky stopped dead. His little Fox was back. And she was even more stunning. “Your hair.”  
  
Amy sighed and started to push past him. Her hair. Irritatingly white again, although at least it was still long. “I know it’s…”  
  
“Like starlight.” Bucky said reverentially. She had transformed into an alabaster statue. He slipped his hand into the silver strands. As soft as ever, it flowed between his fingers shimmering hypnotically. Athena, or Atremis, or some older wilder goddess, because that was what she was, it was impossible to miss with this ethereal hair. She was a goddess.  
  
“Not for long.” Amy pulled her hair out of his grip. That fascinated look made her feel things she didn’t want to deal with. Instead she turned to glare at Steve. He was almost doubled over in silent laughter. “Do I amuse you?”  
  
Steve cleared his throat. He didn’t even try to wipe the grin off his face. He knew it was a lost cause. How much did he love these people? “Sorry. Just wondering if that makes me turnip head.”  
  
“You are a turnip head.” Amy grumbled. Back on earth for less than twelve hours and they were already back to flirting. Did neither of them realise that they had a good thing? That they didn’t need her?  
  
“So, I’m your soul mate?” Steve teased tugging a lock of her silvery hair.  
  
“Gods, I hope not.” Amy tossed her head and shifted out of his reach. Where they just here to drive her crazy with their hands in her hair? “Did you need something?”  
  
Steve shoved his hands in the pockets of his pajama pants. She'd asked for space. He should at least try to keep his hands to himself. “Kind of. Can we talk?”  
  
“Come on.” Amy sighed. Needing to talk right after a mission was never a good sign. “I need to dye my hair.”  
  
Bucky watched Amy stride determinedly towards the bathroom. No 'can it wait' or 'you can talk to me through the door'. Steve didn’t seem surprised either. He was following her with the same air of ‘I know where I’m going'. Like they did this all the time. Which they definitely didn’t. He knew both their schedules by heart. There was no way they were sneaking off the shower together without him knowing. Still they were treating this as natural. It had to be something they had done before. _Before_ , before. From the way Amy had pulled away when Steve had played with her hair it wasn’t romantic. Which didn’t mean he was interested in the procedure. Amy wet and soapy was something he was very interested in, especially if an equally wet and soapy Steve was helping wash her back... Or his back, or some combination there of.  
  
He took a few jogging steps to catch up with Steve. “Are you telling me, we could have been showering with the pretty girl this entire time, and you’re just telling me now.”  
  
Steve wrapped an arm around Bucky’s shoulders. Thanks to the multiple shower stations Bucky had figured out pretty fast that they could shower at the same time. Steve hadn’t even thought to mention that Amy would probably be fine with it too as long as he kept his hands to himself and didn’t stare. “Communal bathing is a thing in Japan. Amy doesn’t think it’s sexual...” A morning in the Avenger’s tower flashed through his mind, rivulets of water tracing Amy’s perfect curves, a wicked smirk looking up at him from her knees. “Except when it is.”  
  
Bucky licked his lips. Something had just happened behind Steve’s eyes. Something very interesting. “You’ll have to tell me _that_ story later.”  
  
Steve shook Bucky playfully with the arm around his neck. He probably would. Bucky had always enjoyed a risqué story and Steve finally had some of his own to share. He was pretty sure it didn’t count as kissing and telling, given that Amy slept in their bed most nights.  
  
*****  
  
By the time the boys made it to the bathroom Amy had stripped down to a towel and wrapped a plastic cape around her shoulders. Bucky was slightly disappointed. He would freely admit he hand hoped this adventure would involve a fully naked Amy. At least those long pretty legs were out on display, as she moved gracefully around the bathroom preparing for some kind of potion making ordeal.  
  
Bucky poked through the myriad containers Amy had spread over the counter. Had these all been hiding in the cupboard? He picked up a narrow purple and white bottle and took a sniff. Sweet floral notes over something nutty. “Do you really use all this shit? What does it even do?”  
  
Amy flicked her eyes to the bottle before pulling on a pair of surgical gloves in pale blue. “That’s conditioner. It makes your hair soft.”  
  
“You don’t have to dye it you know.” Steve crossed his arms over his chest to stop himself from burying his hands in her hair and running his finger through the silky strands. Amy’s white hair had a special place in his heart. He knew she had issues with it, but to him it was a symbol of the way she had come back to him after she had died. “The sliver looks good.”  
  
Amy made a non-committal noise and started mixing the dye components together in a small bowl.  
  
“What about this one?” Bucky asked picking up another bottle that looked very similar to the first.  
  
“That’s my shampoo. What have you been using?” Amy asked distractedly as she checked the consistency of her dye.  
  
“Whatever is in that green bottle Steve uses. It smells like apples.” And Steve’s pillow. Bucky liked that part. He wasn’t sure he liked how bubbly the stuff was. Soap had always been good enough for them before the war.  
  
“That’s probably fine. Your hair is longer than his though, you might want to try conditioning. Who doesn’t want touchable hair?” Amy carefully smeared a border of oil around her hairline.  
  
“Will you play with my hair more if I do?” Bucky grinned and winked at her in the mirror.  
  
“Steve almost certainly will.” Amy ignored the wink. Ignoring Bucky’s flirting was getting harder. He was very good at it, and very persistent.  
  
“That’s not what I asked.” Bucky slipped his arm around her towel wrapped waist and nuzzled the back of her neck. He like the idea of falling asleep while Amy played with his hair.  
  
“If you get dye on yourself and it stains, I’m not going to apologise.” Amy flicked him on the ear with a comb and started sectioning her hair.  
  
Bucky kissed her spine before he let go. That wasn’t an answer. Which was a kind of answer all on its own. She had a point about the dye though. He perched himself on the counter where he could watch both her and Steve and keep picking through the bottles. What was ‘scalp revival scrub’ and when did you use it?  
  
Steve leaned against the counter next to Bucky’s knees. He had always liked watching Amy’s beauty routine. It was the small quiet moments that made him feel close to her.  
  
Two pairs of intense eyes watching you would be distracting no matter who they belonged to. It was especially distracting when they belonged to the two men who insisted on flirting and cuddling with you all the time. Amy could feel all four eyes taking her in. Her skin prickled with something she refused to call anticipation. She needed to shut them down before she got goose bumps or something equally ridiculous. “Fascinating as I'm sure this process is. You’re the one who wanted to talk.”  
  
Steve let out a long breath. He was getting distracted. He didn’t want to. He needed to. He was putting her in danger, and he didn’t know how to stop without asking her to leave. “They know. Or at least they suspect.”  
  
Amy twisted a finished segment of hair into a little knot and pinned it in place. “You’re going to have to be more specific.”  
  
“They know you’re helping us...” Steve found Amy’s eyes, searching for understanding and finding only the blank mask she wore so often lately. It wasn’t just that they thought she was helping the fugitives. No one was worried about her ties to Nat. “They know you’re helping me.”  
  
Amy looked at him sceptically as she painted dye into another segment of her hair. It was unlikely that anyone had any real suspicious. There was nothing that linked her and Steve since their breakup, and given that Bucky had tried to kill her no one was going to guess that she was helping him.  
  
Steve sighed. “Just listen.”  
  
He fiddled with his kimoyo beads until he figured out how to play the audio file he wanted.  
  
“What about Ayame Winters? Has anyone checked to see if he contacted her?” Tony’s digital voice echoed out of Steve’s wrist.  
  
“You think he would?” Amy recognised the new voice. The CIA director.  
  
“I think he loved and trusted her.” Tony sounded more irritating than anything. “If they need help, she’s someone that might be able to do something.”  
  
“Carter?” The CIA director again addressing someone else in the room.  
  
“She hasn't been in contact since Berlin. As far as we know she’s in Wakanda.” Amy wondered how Sharon could sound so wholesomely all American even in a recording. She shouldn’t be jealous. Sharon was a lovely woman, and Amy didn’t have any claim on Steve anymore. She leaned ever so slightly into Bucky’s knee. He shouldn’t be jealous either. Steve loved Bucky more than anything, a blind man could see that.  
  
“Someone reach out. I want confirmation that she hasn’t done something soft like offer one of her foreign apartments to her ex.”  
  
A deep male voice chuckled. That voice belonged to an old friend of Amy’s. One who had been an Army Ranger before he joined the CIA. “You’ve never met the goddess, have you? She isn’t capable of being soft.”  
  
The recording burbled and cut off.  
  
Steve studied Amy’s face intently. She was impassive as always. She should be panicking. If they found out she had helped them... How good were Amy's contacts? If they arrested her, could she pull enough strings to get them to let her go?  
  
It didn’t really matter. The moment their suspicions got any less speculative they would have to leave her. He wouldn’t put her in the kind of danger she would be in if they came for him and his team and she got caught in the crossfire.  
  
Amy wrapped a stained length of linen around her head to cover her hair while the dye set. “Well I can’t say that is ideal.”  
  
“Not ideal?” Steve growled. “I think it is worse than _not ideal_.”  
  
Amy waved a hand dismissively. It was inevitable that someone would think to check. “They don’t know that you’re here. They just want to know if you reached out to me. Which is a fair assumption. You reached out to Tony after all.”  
  
“God damn it, Amy.” Steve slapped a hand on the counter. She wasn’t taking this seriously. If they came for her, they would come for Bucky. He couldn’t lose either of them, let alone both.  
  
“Would you have?” Bucky leaned forward, elbows on knees. Yelling wasn’t going to get them anywhere. “If Amy hadn’t come for us. If we were on the run and you didn’t know if she was alright, would you have reached out? They way you reached out to Stark?”  
  
Steve considered. What would he have done if Amy hadn’t come for them? Nat would have found them somehow; he didn’t doubt that for a second. They would have broken Sam and Wanda out, although it probably would have taken longer. He would have found a way to apologise to Tony. And then.... All the bluster rushed out of him. He was so scared something would happen to the people he loved he was pushing them away himself. Again. “I would have come for you. I would have tried Katsura first. I would have come looking to make sure you were safe.”  
  
Amy arched an eyebrow delicately and stripped off her gloves. “I get more than a letter? I’m flattered.”  
  
“Amy.” He leaned towards her, running his fingers down her arm. Of course, she got more than a letter. She could have everything he had if she’d just let him in again.  
  
She pulled away. That look was too tempting. “I doubt Tony, or the others, would believe you didn’t even try to get a hold of me if you reached out to him.”  
  
Bucky didn’t miss the silent subtext to exchange. They could deal with Steve and Amy's issues later. Right now, they needed to make sure she could stay with them at all. “So, he contacts you. You’re a wild card and they know it. What would you do? If you didn’t--“  
  
“I would have rejected the overture.” Amy cut him off before he could say the _L_ word. She didn’t want Steve to hear it at all, let alone dropped so casually while she was in a state of undress. “If it was anyone other than Steve and Natasha. I don’t know if I would have bothered to tell any government other than my own, but I would have rejected it.”  
  
Steve’s heart clenched. He knew where Bucky was going with this. “So, you should publicly reject it.”  
  
“You’ll need to write the letter. Make it good.” Amy shed her plastic cape and towel, replacing them with the silk robe. Her mind already ten steps ahead of her on a plan. “And let Shuri and Nakia know I want to see them.”  
  
“Where are you going?” Bucky called after her. That was the walk of a woman on a mission.  
  
“To pick an outfit.” Amy called back over her shoulder. She had fifteen minutes before her hair was ready to rinse. She could make plenty of progress in that time.  



	36. Important Messages to Pass Along

The call rang four times before Fredrick answered. Amy unpacked her gear while she waited. Swords back on their stand. Makeup neatly back int the dressing table. Everything had a place, and her mind was more at ease when it was in that place. Her emotional world was in turmoil, but her physical world could be in order.  
  
“Ayame, my sweet beautiful muse. How are you? I miss you.” Fredrick sing songed when he answered. He sounded relaxed and happy. Which made sense. He would just have gotten home from the studio. They were between seasons, so he was working at his own pace not scrambling to meet deadlines.  
  
“I miss you too, Freddy.” Amy crooned back. She missed living close to Dai and Fredrick. Fredrick was a breath of fresh air. No one else in her life was so optimistic and unaffected by the dark parts of the world. “I need some fashion advice.”  
  
“No, swords are not an appropriate accessory for a sun dress.” Came the dry response.  
  
“That was one time.” Amy said feigning indignation. “I need an outfit to publicly reject a guy in video format.”  
  
Fredrick didn’t so much as pause before rattling of the precise list of garments. “The lavender silk tee, give it a French tuck. The charcoal grey jeans with the ripped knees. The Louboutin button booties. And do you have the McQueen skull bracelet there?”  
  
“No, but I’ve got the Tina Chow spike cuff.” Amy said grabbing the box off a shelf next to a collection of shuriken. As much as she missed him, she was also deeply grateful that he couldn’t see how she had arranged her closet/armoury. Frederick would be horrified if he found out she had basically mixed the two together. Weapons sitting alongside accessories. In Amy’s defence there was actually a lot of overlap in her collections, sundress and swords incident aside.  
  
“That will do.” Fredrick chirped. Amy knew he was probably going crazy wondering who she had to reject. He adored drama. “Go with a topknot for your hair and a sharp cat’s eye. You'll look fierce and untouchable.”  
  
“This is why I love you.” Amy sighed. Fredrick really was a gift. She would look fabulous.  
  
“Wear nothing but Gabbana. Your life before me was a dark place.” Fredrick was matter of fact about it. It was true of course. Amy had always loved clothes, but she hadn’t been 'effortlessly chic' until Fredrick had taken over managing her wardrobe.  
  
“Is that Amy?” Amy perked up at the sound of Dai’s voice. He was far from the microphone and slightly out of breath. Probably just back from his evening run.  
  
“Yeah.” The sound of a gentle kiss hello drifted down the phone line, making Amy’s heart let out a pang of longing for that kind of simple love and affection. “She’s got boy problems.”  
  
“She’s got cousin problems.” Dai said in mild irritation. The next time he spoke his voice was closer, like he had taken the phone from Fredrick. “Did you seriously think you could go to space without me finding out?”  
  
“I had hoped.” Amy refused to feel sheepish. She hadn’t _gone_ , she had been _sent_. It was different.  
  
Dai obviously felt the ice in her voice and softened when he spoke again. “How did it go?”  
  
That was a question Amy would very much like an answer to herself. If everything played out the way her Great Grandmother seemed to think it would she might not have to hate herself for what she’d done. “Too soon to tell. I either sewed the seeds for a vindictive goddess to kill my grandfather and uncle and take over the universe or arranged for the family to stage a coup and gain sovereignty over hell.”  
  
“So, as well as you could have hoped.” Dai sighed. Amy could picture him rubbing his eyes in frustration perfectly. “What now?”  
  
“Now I convince the world that Steve tried to get in touch, and I told him to go fuck himself.” Amy said making sure her the makeup on her dressing stand was all perfectly aligned. “Life on earth doesn’t stop because of interplanetary drama. Would you mind terribly if I asked you to hack into the UPS servers for me?”  
  
*****  
  
Amy lifted her chin determinedly. Her hair was washed, dried, and piled into a messy raven black bun on the top of her head. It had taken a few hours to get everything arranged, but this plan would work. She had already sent an email to Sharon at the CIA with a summery of what the letter had said and an apology for not letting them know about the contact earlier. She had used the excuse that the package had gotten mixed up in a diplomatic parcel and had only just gotten into her hands. There would probably be push back on her decision to not share the original letter. She had planned to.  
  
Then she had read what Steve had written. When she had said make it good, he had taken it as a direct order. He had poured his heart out to her. Apologising better on paper than he had managed in person. Explaining why he had done what he had done since being presented with the accords. Promising to be there if she needed him. Reminding her that he loved her. She would let the CIA analysts pick his beautiful words apart when they managed to get a court order for it. Something that would be particularly hard given that in most situations, she would be the person they sent the letter to for analysis. A fact she had pointed out in her email.  
  
Now it was time for the second half of this charade. The half that had brought her to a field outside the palace. On either side of her Shuri and Nakia waited for her signal. Behind them was a barrel full of accelerant. Around their heads a camera drone hovered. Even the concept of this felt vicious. Attacking Steve in a medium that gave no context and left no room for him to respond. It was coldly brutal. It had to be done. Shuri and Nakia had helped produce a script for their little propaganda film, one that was a gentle as they could make it without showing any softness towards the wanted criminals. She just hoped it would work. It would break her heart if she did this and they still came looking for her boys and Natasha in Wakanda. At least Sam and Wanda would be safely out of the way by the end of next week.  
  
Amy tightened her grip on the spare emergency phone she was holding, the same kind Steve had sent to Tony, and nodded. The sooner they did this, the safer everyone would be.  
  
The drone’s record light blinked on.  
  
Amy looked directly into the camera. “I don’t give second chances.”  
  
Amy tossed the phone into the barrel. Flames exploded. The roar almost drowned out as music blared out of nearly invisible speakers. _I don’t need a man--_  
  
All three woman danced, throwing their hands above their heads and swaying along to the early 2000’s beat. Bright, poppy, but aggressive. _\--I get off doing my thing--_  
  
_\--To make me feel complete--_ Shuri’s drone whirred to the ground and the record light blinked off. The dancing stopped abruptly.  
  
“Think there is a solid six seconds in there?” Amy asked coolly. She didn’t know why she had agreed to the song choice. The message was good. The main course line about not needing a ring hit too close to home.  
  
“I think we are about to go viral.” Shuri grinned evilly. Already editing the video on her holographic interface. “What’s your Vine account?”  
  
“Princess Kitsui, no space, the P and K are capitalised. Do you want the password?” Amy asked watching the younger girls finger fly.  
  
Shuri looked at her like she had suggested she needed training wheels.  
  
Amy bowed her head apologetically. It had been a silly question. Shuri was the smartest person she had ever met. Why would she need something as inconsequential as a password to a social media account?  
  
Steve had been hovering out of camera shot the entire time. Watching as the woman he loved told the world she didn’t care about him. The only thing that might soften the blow, would be her throwing her arms around his neck and laughing at their farce. It wasn’t going to happen, and he knew it. She could barely look at him as the group broke up.  
  
Amy started away from their filming location, following the curve of the palace wall towards the door that would take her back to their suite. Her outfit was pretty, but she wanted to be back in her gi, running through slow lazy drills with her blades. Something simple and uncomplicated.  
  
“What does it say that that hurt even though I knew it was fake?” Steve asked falling into step next to her.  
  
“Who said it was fake?” Amy stretched and felt the joints pop in her neck. She was going to regret skipping Bucky’s nap this afternoon. “I really don’t give second chances. Contrary to popular belief, I rarely give first chances, and never to someone who is already in a relationship.”  
  
Steve looked between the still smouldering barrel behind them and Amy’s proud expression. She did deserve better. She deserved to be someone’s whole world. He couldn’t give her that. He had Bucky. Bucky needed him. Bucky loved him. Someday Amy would meet someone who could give her the kind of love and devotion she deserved. His feet faltered. How would he let her go when that day came?  
  
Amy sighed. Her sad puppy of a man. She stepped closer so she could rub his arm comfortingly. “It means you care. I don’t know why, or how to get you to stop, but I know you care.”  
  
“I don’t want to stop.” Steve whispered setting his hands on her slim waist and holding her the way he used to. He had no idea what he did want. All he knew was the idea of losing either her or Bucky felt like a shot to the gut. It was selfish. It was stupid. It was true.  
  
Amy cupped his face, smoothing her thumbs over his cheeks. “You should. You have someone who’s a better fit these days.”  
  
Steve covered one of Amy’s hands with his. She fit so well with them herself. It was hard to picture what her meeting someone who deserved her would look like. There was no way she’d be able to sleep in their bed once she started a new relationship. But what about the quiet moments when she was helping Bucky fall asleep? Would they lose that right away too? Or would there be a long painful period as she drifted away? And breakfast. Amy and Bucky ate breakfast together most days. Amy perched on the counter with Bucky leaning against her side eating whatever fruit he had selected off the point of her knife. Would that strange domesticity disappear?  
  
A shadowy figure pounced on them from around the corner. Bucky had been waiting for them. His nap had been disappointing without either of them there. Then after he had woken up it hadn’t taken long for watching Natasha work to get boring. Plus, he worried about leaving his stubborn people alone. Things tended to get tense when they were alone. They weren’t fighting at least. Whatever this quiet staring into each other’s eyes was, it wasn’t fighting.  
  
Bucky pressed himself into Amy’s back, wrapping his arm around to hold Steve too. He nuzzled Any neck softly. “What are we talking about?”  
  
“How much Steve loves you.” Amy answered evenly. A slight obfuscation, not a lie.  
  
“Mmm. Good conversation topic.” Bucky tightened his hold and nipped at her ear. “When do we move on to how much he loves you?”  
  
“We don’t.” Amy said stiffly slipping out of their hold, leaving Steve’s hands empty and Bucky with his arm just around Steve.  
  
That was better. It made more sense. Why was she suddenly cold all over?  
  
*****  
  
“Do you have a moment?” Amy asked leaning against the end of the desk next to Nat. She had intended to do this as soon as she’d finished dying her hair. Covering their tracks had taken precedence.  
  
Nat didn’t pause her typing. So many of her contacts needed reassuring these days. “I always have one if it’s interesting.”  
  
Amy resisted the urge to drape herself dramatically over the desk. Too much of her life was interesting. She would kill for a little normality. She wasn’t going to get it today. Today she was going to ruin Nat's life with interesting. “How would you like to be a full-blooded Fox?”  
  
Nat froze with her hands over the keyboard. Amy had mentioned it before, so had Sakura, but Nat hadn’t been entirely convinced that it was a genuine offer. Bringing it up again now meant something big had happened that Amy couldn’t share with anyone outside the family. “Well, that is interesting.”  
  
*****  
  
Amy poured three small cups of sake, pushing the first one towards Natasha. In most adoption ceremonies the sake was symbolic. In this one it was slightly more. A gift from her Grandmother on the off chance she needed to do things this was instead of bringing Nat home.  
  
They both took a small sip from each glass. A soft buzz started in the tips of Natasha’s fingers. The sensation travelled up her extremities. Tingling along her spine. Prickling at the back of her eyes. The sensation crystallised just behind her sternum. Forming into ball of what felt like cold light. She exhaled and the light dissipated, spreading through her entire body, leaving her feeling centred and energised.  
  
Nat flexed her fingers. It was an interesting feeling. A cross between shards of ice and sparks coursing through her veins. The closest thing she had experienced was hugging Thor immediately after a fight. Unnerving and reassuring at the same time. “That’s all it takes?”  
  
“That’s the quick and dirty version.” Amy said studying her friend for aftereffects. The ritual itself was simple. How people reacted to it was more complicated. Nat didn’t look like she was about to pass out. She wasn’t glowing or shaking uncontrollably. From where Amy was sitting it looked like it had taken.  
  
“Why rush things?” Nat narrowed her eyes. There was something Amy wasn’t telling her.  
  
“A lot of things happened while you were off chasing people flying a flag they don’t understand. Let me catch you up.” Amy closed her eyes and took a deep breath. If the adoption had worked, she should be able to find Nat's mind.  
  
It was exactly where it should be. A shimmering red and black veil, just on the other side of the dove grey one that separated Amy from the hive mind. Amy gently pressed her memories from the last couple days against the veil, along with all the context she could find.  
  
*****  
  
Nat lowered herself to the floor, laying on her back. She needed to feel the world _not_ shifting around her for a moment. “Holy shit.”  
  
“Yup.” Amy said stretching out next to her.  
  
Nat blinked at the ceiling. “The entire planet?”  
  
“Pishoom” Amy mimed an explosion above her head.  
  
Nat chewed her lip. They couldn’t just let an inhabited planet get destroyed without trying to help. “And you can’t tell Thor.”  
  
“Physically can't.” Amy was exercising all her self-control to avoid grinding her jaw.  
  
“Loki?” Nat asked hopefully. Amy’s grandfather was a devious bastard. If they could let him know what was going on, he could throw the full force of his scheming mind into finding a solution.  
  
“Dito. Don’t worry though. I am assured that he will be filled in on his roll.” Amy carefully enunciated each word.  
  
Nat turned her head to gape at Amy. And she thought Fury was bad about compartmentalisation. And to think a few hours ago she'd been worried about the Peruvian elections. “That sentence means literally nothing.”  
  
“I am aware.” Amy said coldly. She was a little tired of everything in her life being furtive and underhanded.  
  
They lapsed into silence. Nat trying to absorb the new information and adjust to her new mental situation. Amy brooding on her life and the forces both internal and external that had brought her to this point.  
  
Nat tapped her fingers meditatively against her lips. There was an angel. There was always an angel. “What if we tell someone… _else_?”  
  
“What?” Amy groaned without moving the arm covering her eyes.  
  
“What if we told…” Nat snapped trying to remember the name. It was on the tip of her tongue. There was far too much going on in her brain for information to come easily to her just now. “The bridge guy. What’s his name? Thor says he’s always watching. Maybe I’m projecting, but he sounds like Asgard's version of us.”  
  
“Heimdall.” Amy supplied. She turned the idea over in her head. She knew him by reputation more than anything. “That could work. At very least he can probably evacuate the civilians.”  
  
Nat tucked her hands behind her head. One problem led to another. Telling him was all well and good in theory. Practice was a different issue. “Now we just have to figure out how to have a conversation with someone neither of us has been introduced to, who isn’t on this planet, and we have no direct line to.”  
  
Amy rolled onto her stomach and pressed up. That was actionable. “We need a sacred pool.”  
  
*****  
  
Finding an appropriate body of water was reasonably easy. Nakia showed them to the garden of the heart shaped herb, as soon as they explained what they needed and why. The temple garden was scorched, the wall smeared with soot, but the pools at the base of the giant panther statues were intact.  
  
Getting a hold of Heimdall was also less of an ordeal than Nat would have guessed. A lump of incense burning in a silver dish, a hand gesture with a two fingered ring Amy had fetched from deep in her jewellery box, a whistling breath shifting the surface bid the water, and Amy and Natasha were looking down at a rippling image of a dark-skinned man with glowing golden eyes.  
  
Explaining who they were and why they were bothering him was slightly more complicated. It took the better part of an hour before either Amy or Nat felt convinced that he trusted them, and another hour to lay out the facts as they understood them.  
  
When they were done, they waited expectantly while he considered.  
  
It was a long silent pause while he weighed the information. “Oden is dying. He isn’t strong enough to fight Hela.”  
  
Amy felt Nat shift subtly next to her. She agreed. That news complicated things. They had been counting on there being a strong hand on the wheel to guide the population through the upcoming turmoil. Thor was lovely, but he wasn’t exactly a _king_.  
  
“Well then we had better hope his sons are.” Amy met Heimdall's eyes in the liquid reflection. Inscrutable purple to ineffable gold. They both knew that this warning was all she could offer. If her grandfather and his brother needed help, they would have to go through more senior members of the family than her.  
  
Heimdall nodded slowly. “This day was always going to come. I will do what I can.”  
  
The image shimmered and vanished.  
  
Amy let herself slump. Her powers were completely drained. Bucky had better be alright for the next couple of days, because she wouldn’t be able to do anything about it if he wasn’t.  
  
She still felt like she was playing with half a deck. Everything was catch up. They hadn’t been able to get ahead of anything since the bomb had gone off in Vienna. “The problem with grand plans is they tend to involve a lot of people. People are always so unreliable.”  
  
“Do you think I should have asked him about Bruce?” Natasha leaned against Amy. How many opportunities did you get to talk to a being that could see everything at once? There had been no sign of him in a year and a half. What if something had happened? Bruce was such a soft touch. She couldn’t decide which would hurt her more. If something had happened or if he was actively avoiding her.  
  
Amy wrapped her arms around her friend and squeezed reassuringly. “I’m sure he's fine. He can take care of himself.”  
  
“What are we doing?” Nat asked the ceiling.  
  
“The best we can?” Amy’s words were a question not a statement. She had no idea what they were doing. Everything felt like sand running through her fingers lately.  
  
“Fuck.” Nat swore rubbing her temples. She had a headache. “I hate being out of my depth.”  
  
Amy would drink to that. At least they were keeping their heads above water... So far.  
  
*****  
  
Steve pulled up short at the sight of Amy slumped on the couch. She was still wearing the clothes from the afternoon video shoot. Button fly open on her jeans, accessories and shoes abandoned at some point. It was late. He'd changed for bed. Bucky was already in bed. He'd expected to find Amy in the bathroom making sure all the dye was out of her hair before she stained the pillows.  
  
Instead she was here. Looking like she had just stumbled in for a wild party. The bottom six inches of her pants were soaking wet.  
  
“Where have you been?” It came out sharper than he’d meant it too.  
  
Amy closed her eyes. If that wasn’t the kind of question that would start a fight between the two of them these days, she didn’t know what was. She hated fighting with Steve. “Can we not do this right now? It has been a long day.”  
  
Steve sighed and sank onto the couch next to her. He didn’t want to do this at all. At least not if ‘this’ was another fight. It didn’t matter where Amy had disappeared to this time. She only felt the need to disappear because they were doing such a bad job of communicating. He didn’t want to know where she’d been or who she’d been with. He wanted to know that she was alright. “Have you eaten?”  
  
“I had a smoothie.” Amy said rubbing her eyes. She was so tired. Food felt like too much work. Everything felt like too much work. She had no idea how she was going to make up her futon. Steve’s second question had been softer. Maybe she didn’t have to sleep alone. Maybe she could fall straight into a warm already made bed.  
  
“Good.” Steve scooped her into his arms and stood up. Dai wasn’t here to look after her, he would have to. “Then it is bedtime.”  
  
“I’m not a child.” Amy glared at him but didn’t struggle. Bed sounded like heaven.  
  
“No. You’re just falling asleep on the couch.” Steve shifted so he could hold her with one arm and strip her jeans off with the other. The fact she didn’t resist was evidence for how worn out his girl was. The rest of her clothes could stay, they were close enough to what she normally slept in. “Come on. Bucky's reading _White Fang_ tonight.”  
  
Amy didn’t get much of a chance to listen to Bucky reading in his soft low voice. She fell asleep almost as soon as Steve lay her down on her side of the bed. The last thing she remembered was a soft press of lips to her temple. “Sleep tight, little Fox. We'll keep you safe while you do.”  
  
She didn’t know who the kiss was from, or who had muttered sweet words that just reached her exhausted mind. It didn’t really matter either way. Soft dreams pulled her under. Dreams of being cradled safe and warm. A real fox curled between a huge white wolf and an equally large golden bear.


	37. Always Hard When They Leave The Nest

It was a perfect day. The sky was bright and clear. It looked like it was going to be warm, but not too hot. Looking on the bright side was not helping Steve’s nerves. The sky might be clear, but he was mired under a cloud of worry. Wanda didn’t seem to be under the same cloud. She had her bag slung over one shoulder and was obviously done listening to Steve’s final instructions.  
  
Steve pressed on anyway. She needed to know this. He would never forgive himself if something happened because he hadn’t drilled these lessons into her head. “The slightest hint that someone recognises you, and you call us. You even think that someone is watching, you call. You don’t miss any check in. If you’re going to be away from the house overnight, you tell Sam. Anyone in any of your classes starts acting suspiciously, you call us. Understand?”  
  
“Yes _dad_.” Wanda rolled her eyes. “Nat and Amy think I can do this.”  
  
Steve pulled her into a bone crushing hug. The girls were one thing, his gut was another. “Just call.”  
  
“If I do will you stop worrying about me?” Wanda grumbled. Hugging him back.  
  
“You’re going to be living in the lion’s den. Just because one of the lions has promised to keep you safe, doesn’t mean I’m going to stop worrying.” Steve kissed her forehead and let her go.  
  
Wanda jogged towards Natasha and the waiting jet. Steve watched her go anxiously. She was almost definitely going to be fine. The was no way Amy or Natasha would have agreed to this plan if she was in any real danger.  
  
“How much are you freaking out right now.” Sam asked hefting his bag, so it sat more comfortably. Steve didn’t do well with not being able to protect his team himself.  
  
Steve gave his head a sharp shake to clear it. “I didn’t think I could have an asthma attack anymore.”  
  
“She’s going to be alright. I'll be there to keep an eye on her.” Sam reassured his Captain. They would be alright.  
  
Steve looked at Sam intently. He had been so busy worrying about Wanda he hadn’t paid enough attention to the risk Sam was exposing himself to. “All that checking in stuff goes for you too, Sam. I want status updates twice a week. With full threat assessments. And if Brian is anything less than a perfect boyfriend--“  
  
Sam laughed out loud at that. “I’ll call Amy. She’s way more likely to remove parts of him to prove a point than you are.”  
  
“Good point.” Steve hugged Sam. “Stay safe. I'll talk to you soon.”  
  
Sam pounded Steve’s back affectionately. “Same goes for you. And if you need to get away give us a call. We can find you a cover that will hold for a weekend at least.”  
  
Steve flicked his eyes back towards the palace and their suite. The suite where Bucky and Amy were waiting. Bucky reading with his head in Amy’s lap. Amy trying to work without disturbing him, her computer balanced on the arm of the couch. “I’m not--“  
  
“Not leaving Bucky. I know.” Sam sighed. He wasn’t suggesting Steve abandon his best friend and the man he loved. He was suggesting that Bucky had a lot going on and Steve might need a break. “Standing offer. Don’t burn yourself out.”  
  
Steve rolled his eyes and punched Sam in the shoulder. “Get out of here, before Nat yells at us both.”  
  
“Oh, now it’s 'get out of here', I see how it is.” Sam walked backwards towards the jet. Someone had to look after Steve. “Sending me away isn’t going to stop me from trying to get you to manage your emotions in a healthy way. You’re stuck with me man. Get used to it.”  
  
*****  
  
Sam’s black cab pulled up in front of a classic Georgian town house. The white limestone gleamed, the wrote iron fence contrasting starkly. A small potted yew tree sat next to the shiny black door. And pacing excitedly in front of the whole affair, looking incredibly British in slacks and a button up with rolled sleeves, was Brian.  
  
Sam found himself pulled into a tight hug before he made it all the way out of the car. Strong arms crushing his ribs. Brian’s face pressed into his neck. “Thank god you’re safe. Do you have any idea how worried I’ve been?”  
  
Sam tipped his own face into Brian’s hair. His boy smelled like soap and expensive cologne. Like sunlight and sweat. Like safety and home. “I know pretty boy. I’ve been worried right back.”  
  
Brian pulled Sam bodily through the door, dragging his kit bag with them.  
  
“Amy pulled some strings and got me a job at Doctors Without Borders. Logistics, working out of the London office. I might have to check in with my team in the field sporadically though, if anything concerning looks like it is going on.”  
  
“Well I’m glad you got the transfer put through.” Brain said kissing down Sam’s neck. “I always worried about you working in that refugee camp where we met.”  
  
“You’re up to speed then?” Sam was glad he didn’t have to explain. He could think of way better ways to spend his first couple hours living with Brian.  
  
“Aims and Nat gave me a very detailed briefing.” Brian growled untucking Sam’s shirt.  
  
“There is a debriefing joke there, but I can’t think of it right now.” Sam mumbled into Brian’s mouth. He couldn’t think of anything other than how good Brian’s hands felt just now.  
  
*****  
  
The garden flat behind Dane and Falsa’s house was perfect for a student. At least, a student who could afford the kind of rent a private flat in this neighbourhood could command. It was better than perfect for a long term safehouse. Everything about it screamed nonthreatening, while still being easily defendable. Big airy windows, with terrible sightlines thanks to the taller buildings surrounding the flat. A private entrance the let out on the back lane via a narrow staircase, that could be easily monitored with one camera. A back exit into the main house that could be ‘locked’ for appearance sake, without cutting off escape. One bedroom that looked into the garden not out onto the street.  
  
Natasha made one more pass to check that the security monitoring was all in place. Wanda was in the living room, hanging her carefully chosen curtains.  
  
“You’ve got your class schedule?” Natasha asked crisply. It was time to let the chick leave the nest. That didn’t mean she wasn’t going to worry.  
  
“Yes.” Wanda rolled her eyes. They had gone over things enough times on the plane.  
  
Natasha ignored her irritation. The smallest slip could put everything at risk. “You remember your name?”  
  
“Rada Petrov.” Wanda answered as soon as Nat voiced her next question. Seriously she _knew_ all of it. “My father is a mid-level oligarch in the fuel industry. I choose Kings College because I want to go into hotels and having connections abroad is important.”  
  
Natasha nodded. That was good. Quick answers. “And Sam?”  
  
“You mean Mr. Hayes? I don’t really know him. I’ve met him a couple of times in passing when my landlord throws a party, like the BBQ tonight. He does something for Doctors without Borders, I think. He seems nice.” Wanda answered careful to make herself sound like a typical college student. Natasha would appreciate the conformation that she had her cover personality down too.  
  
Natasha had been doing this too long to think everything would go smoothly. “Call if anything happens. If you even think something might be happening.”  
  
“Nat! I will be fine!” Wanda groaned flopping onto the couch.  
  
Natasha bent down to kiss her forehead maternally. “And keep us up to speed on how your classes are going.”  
  
Wanda sat up to glare at her. “You know if I had wanted someone to act like a mother dropping their child of at kindergarten, I would have let Steve come.”  
  
“Alright, I’m going. Stay close. Check in.” Natasha gave her one last hug. Wanda would be fine. Splitting up the group would make them all safer in the long run. And Wanda would flourish at college.  
  
*****  
  
Amy stalked around her prey. An imaginary opponent in the centre of the room. He had a gun with four shots left. She had her tanto. The benefit of an imaginary enemy was they were fully capable of shooting her, and she didn’t have to hold back. On the other hand, every move was completely arbitrary. But Amy was getting frustrated with running drills and needed something more freeform today. She closed her eyes, the better to focus.  
  
Amy dive rolled over a shot and under a wild punch. She jammed her dagger in under his ribs. Three stabs in quick succession, then spring away. The other thing about imaginary opponents was they didn’t go down easily.  
  
He shot two more rounds at her chest. Amy ducked and froze. Tense, close to the ground, one leg posted to the side for balance. One more shot.  
  
He levelled the gun at her head. She held her position. Watch the eyes not the hand.  
  
The last shot fired. She could almost feel the bullet ruffle her hair. Amy launched herself forward.  
  
She plunged her dagger into his back and twisted it. Angle up and too the left. Strike for the heart.  
  
The illusion vanished from her minds eye.  
  
Amy opened her eyes and turned her attention to the audience that had arrived before her last attack. “Everything alright, Bucky Baby?”  
  
“You’re good at that.” Bucky said stepping all the way into the room. “How many were there?”  
  
“Four originally.” Amy flexed the hand holding her dagger.  
  
“I don’t like thinking of you as violent.” He took the knife from her and flipped it over in his hand. It was heavier than he had expected. Heavier than the Japanese style knife that had been included in the gear he had been gifted in Berlin. Heavier than Bucky would pick for combat, but an appropriate weight for training. Train with a heavier weapon to compensate for the fact that in combat you would probably be fatigued. Bucky had taught _Ryzhiy_ that lesson. Amy had obviously learned it too.  
  
“I am what I am.” Amy watched the blade flash hypnotically. His muscle memory was impeccable. He might not like it, but he was pretty good at being violent himself.  
  
“I know. I don’t like thinking about Natasha or Steve having to be violent either.” Bucky shrugged. In an ideal world none of them would have to be. They didn’t live in an ideal world. He flipped the knife one more time and offered it back to her. “Did I kill President Kennedy?”  
  
Amy curled her fingers around the tanto’s hilt. She wouldn’t lie to him about something this important. “Yes. It was quite an impressive shot really.”  
  
“They framed someone else.” He sat down heavily on the floor. The memories had always been in his head. Jumbled, confused, lacking order or context. The more time he spent safe and well fed, the more they came into focus. Not just the horrible parts, all the things surrounding the horrible parts. He couldn’t decide if it was better or worse.  
  
Amy knelt next to him, just close enough that he could lean on her, if he wanted that kind of comfort. “They did. He was a mid level Hydra agent who had become problematic, even before the assassination.”  
  
“I killed him too.” Bucky leaned heavily against her side. Her appreciated her steady presence. She knew what he had done, and she was never afraid of him.  
  
“Yeah, Bucky Baby, you did.” Amy rubbed his back soothingly. “I don’t know if it helps. But Kennedy's death made a real difference and not the kind Hydra had planned on. Most of his civil rights legacy only passed because he died.”  
  
“It helps a little.” Bucky buried his face in her long dark hair. It helped more when she smiled with her eyes. No one really evil could earn that smile. He was sure of that, deep down in the same place he knew that Steve would never abandon him.  
  
“They wanted to capture Steve. Those were my last orders. Capture or kill. They were going to do _this_ to him.” She wouldn’t be able to see the gesture to his head, but she would feel it. She would know what he meant.  
  
“That’s why you had to finish your mission.” Amy’s heart hammered in her chest. Steve turned into a mindless killing machine. Her sweet boy doing terrible things that would break his heart. And not being able to save him would break Bucky.  
  
Bucky shook his head against her neck. She thought he was better at this sort of thing than he was these days. “Still have to finish it. I never got the Defence Minister. If he gets his hands on Steve….”  
  
“They won’t.” Amy said confidently. She would take care of the Minister herself if she had to. No one was going to hurt either of the boys if she had any say in the matter.  
  
Bucky pulled Amy all the way into his lap. Wrapping his arm around her and pressing his face harder against her neck. Time for the hard part of the conversation, the part he had been putting off. “I can’t keep living like this, baby girl. I want to fix my brain. I… I already talked to Shuri. She thinks she can help. It might not be… safe… for anyone…. I haven’t told Steve yet.”  
  
Amy shifted so she could get her arms around him in return. “Okay. What do you need from me?”  
  
Bucky lifted his head to meet her eyes. “Promise you’ll be on my side?”  
  
“Easy.” Amy tucked a lock of his hair behind his ear.  
  
Bucky needed more than just Amy on his side. He needed to know someone would tell him the truth about how things were going. “Promise you won’t lie to me?”  
  
“About what?” There was no reason to hide the truth from him on most things. But there were a few subjects, specifically relating to her, that she wasn’t prepared to completely bear her heart on.  
  
“Anything.” Better not to give the Fox any wiggle room. She was clever enough to get around anything.  
  
Amy licked her lips. He already knew her too well. It was still a reasonable request. “I promise. Although, I reserve the right to not answer.”  
  
Bucky smirked at the answer. That was his little Fox, he should have known she’d still find a way around his questions, at least this way he could infer from the questions she wouldn’t answer. “I can live with that. Promise you won’t fight with Steve?”  
  
Amy laughed and kissed his head. “I promise I will _try_ not to fight with Steve.”  
  
“Guess that’s all I can expect. He is a stubborn punk.” Bucky nuzzled her shoulder. That was everything important. But there was something else he wanted from her. “One more thing?”  
  
“What else could you need?” Amy said shoving at his head. She would give him anything if he kept looking up at her with those puppy dog eyes.  
  
“Come to bed?” Bucky pulled her back in close. Burying his face in her hair and it’s reassuringly sweet and smoky sent. “It is too big without you there.”  
  
Amy leaned into the arm wrapped around her. What were the odds? His bed was too big and hers was too cold. She wondered if Steve had any problems with his lately. They would all have to get used to it at some point. But not tonight. “Okay Bucky baby. Tonight, I'll sleep in your room.”  
  
He meant every night, not just tonight. The little Fox was skittish though. It might take time to ease her into the idea. Assuming his plan didn’t lead to his mind snapping and him killing the people he cared about. “We’re going to be alright… right?”  
  
“Everything is going to be just fine.” Amy rubbed her hand along his jaw.


	38. Bucky Has A Better Plan

The door to the bedroom crashed open.  
  
Bucky and Amy were both on their feet before the door was fully open. Bucky went to one knee by the bed with a gun drawn. Amy stood by the pillows with a knife in hand.  
  
“It is very difficult to scan your brain, without your brain. I have been calling you since seven. Where are your beads? Why aren’t you wearing them?”  
  
Steve sighed and put himself between them and the intruder. Where had they even gotten weapons? He loved them. His wonderful paranoid people. “You need to learn to knock.” He set a hand on Bucky’s arm and gently pushed it down. Even from here he could hear Bucky breathing way too fast.  
  
Shuri rolled her eyes. “Are you going to let me help or not.”  
  
“What does helping look like?” Steve asked shifting his bulk in front of Bucky. Helping Bucky seemed to involve locking him up more often than not. Steve didn’t want to see Bucky locked up again.  
  
“Like seeing if she can figure out why my brain keeps making me do things I don’t want to do. I asked for her help, Steve.” Bucky said exhaustedly. He had wanted to break this to Steve gently. He should have known that Shuri wouldn’t give him long once she got the bit between her teeth.  
  
Steve turned around to face him. Bucky was leaning against the side of the bed. He looked so drained.  
  
Amy was the one who moved towards him first. Sitting next to him and guiding his head onto her shoulder. Bucky automatically turned his face into her neck. At the same time laying his hand in her lap and letting her take the gun from him.  
  
Steve knelt next to them. He looked at Amy who gave him a tiny nod. She knew. She agreed. “Okay. We'll get you any help you need.”  
  
Bucky took Steve’s hand. “I love you, Stevie.”  
  
*****  
  
Steve wished Amy and Shuri would stop muttering in the corner and get on with it. They had been in the lab for almost twenty minutes already and the longer Bucky spent sitting on the exam table the more stressed he looked.  
  
Steve rubbed Bucky’s leg reassuringly. “You alright Buck?”  
  
“Fine. Fine just me and hospitals don’t really get along, ya know?” It was strange. He had spent time in the lab without getting anxious. The exam table was soft and warm, completely different from any of the ones in his memory. But sitting here still made him jumpy.  
  
“I’ll be right here with you the entire time.” Steve squeezed his knee and looked back at the women. The sooner they started the sooner this would be over.  
  
Amy and Shuri were finally on their way back over. At least Amy was. Shuri was fidgeting with some tablet thing near the side of the alcove.  
  
Bucky perked up a little as Amy swept up to the table looking far more relaxed than either of the men. The silk skirt wafted around her knees lending her an especially ethereal air. “What about you, baby girl?”  
  
“I’m your anaesthesiologist, Bucky baby. I will be quite literally holding your hand the entire time.” Amy settled on the stool and tangled her fingers with his.  
  
Steve leaned himself against the wall where he could watch them both and Bucky could see him.  
  
Shuri flipped a control tablet into her hands. She swiped at the screen and a small glowing scanner clicked out of the wall at Bucky’s feet. Whirring softly as it floated over the table towards the other end of the table. The whirring got louder as it reached his shoulders and started recording data.  
  
Bucky twitched violently. It was too close to his head. They were going to wipe him. He didn’t want to go away again.  
  
Amy hummed tonelessly rubbing Bucky’s arm and forcing more of her power out of her hand and into his.  
  
Bucky whimpered and tighten his grip on Amy’s hand. Steve saw her flinch at the pressure. If it was tight enough to make Amy flinch, Bucky had to be holding on for dear life. By Steve’s estimate, he was seconds away from breaking and running. He couldn’t watch this anymore. “Stop.”  
  
Shuri froze. Amy flicked her eyes towards him, before immediately focusing on Bucky again. Bucky turned his head a locked his attention onto Steve, desperation obvious in ever line of his face.  
  
“This isn’t going to work.” Steve shoved away from the wall. Bucky didn’t feel safe. What was the point of rescuing him and hiding them away from the world if he didn’t feel safe? No one here wanted Bucky to lose control right now. And if Bucky did lose control and hurt either Amy or Shuri he would never forgive himself. There had to be something they could do. Well maybe not they. He wasn’t any kind of medical professional and he didn’t possess an innate talent for manipulating moods. Luckily, he was a trained Captain, and if there was one thing Captains had to be good at it was delegating. “Amy?”  
  
Amy consider the unspoken question for a second before deciding on a course of action. She shoved the pillow out of the way and inserted herself in its place. Carefully she arranged it so she was firmly in contact with Bucky and as little of her would appear in the scans as possible. Bucky’s neck resting over one leg, the other dangling off the edge of the table. Skirt hitched up so they had skin contact. More skin and closer to his head she should be better able to fine tune her effects. Especially if they had eye contact. She set her hand gently on her knees and settled her features into the calm mask of a peaceful goddess statue.  
  
Steve took Bucky’s hand and squeezed. “We’ve got you. Just hang in there a little longer.”  
  
Bucky seemed calmer with his head in Amy lap. Sparks danced from her leg into his neck and sparkled in her eyes.  
  
Steve curled his free hand around Amy’s calf, grounding himself. She looked at him curiously and allowed a few sparks to drift over to him. An immediate sense of calm and safety washed over him. If this was how she made Bucky feel every night, it was no wonder he had started treating her like a teddy bear.  
  
“You’re going to be in the scans.” Shuri grumbled. She could edit the extra bones out, but a clean scan would have been better.  
  
Amy smoothed a hand over Bucky’s hair. It was amazing that he was still so trusting after everything he had been through. If she could help prove that his faith in the world wasn’t misplaced, she would. Sweet terrified wolf pup. She would keep him safe. “You’ll figure it out.”  
*****  
  
Bucky had taken up residence on the suite’s couch and refused to leave when they finally got back. Steve had tried to get him to go to bed. But he insisted that they wait in the main room. He had seen Amy after one of his attacks enough times to know she wouldn’t be at her best. He wanted her to know that they were there for her, without her having to look for them.  
  
Amy on the other hand, had only waited long enough for the boys to get settled before she retreated to the bathroom. Using her powers for an extended period of time always left her feeling rotten. Almost two hours of keeping Bucky _and_ Steve calm had left her drained and deeply sick.  
  
Steve fretted, scuttling back and forth between Bucky on the couch and the closed door, trying to comfort both of them at the same time. About a half hour in Bucky started to look a little better, he was still peaky, and his hand hadn’t stopped shaking. But his eyes had brightened again, and he wasn’t cold to the touch anymore. He was still needy, insisting Steve rub his neck and kiss his hair.  
  
Bucky was faking some of it. Out of the hospital, he felt miles better. But he like being pampered. Hadn’t he earned a little selfish hedonism?  
  
Eventually, a slightly glassy eyed and pale Amy stumbled into the living room and slumped over the back of the couch. Bucky huffed and tugged at her arm until she rolled onto his chest. He nuzzled her hair. She was soft and she smelled so _good_. He wanted her to kiss him again. He wanted to spend the rest of the day lazily kissing one or both of them. He wanted them to make him feel human again. He nipped at her ear, trying to get her to turn her face towards his.  
  
Amy pushed his head away softly. Aside from anything else, kissing sounded awful right now. She had brushed her teeth and used mouthwash twice and her mouth _still_ tasted acidic. “Were you always this bad?”  
  
Bucky tucked his nose behind her ear and chuckled. “If Steve had a nickel for every time he caught me necking with a dame, we wouldn’t have had a problem paying rent.”  
  
“Yeah only now you’re not necking with some girl from Vinegar Hill, you’re trying to seduce the emperor of Japan’s niece.” Steve shifted so they were more comfortable resting on-top of him. He liked this. The weight of the two of them. Their playful, if tired, banter. He wished they could have this all the time. The hot warm strength of Bucky’s back pressing into him. The silky coolness when Amy’s skin brushed against his. Piled together like this there was nothing that could hurt any of them. The people he loved most in this world were safe, protected, and they were only going to get better.  
  
Bucky twisted to look back at Steve in mock horror. “Steve. She threw up less than an hour ago. It would be highly inappropriate for me to try and seduce her... right now.”  
  
Bucky pushed Amy’s hair back from her face, it was sticky with sweat around her temples. She was looking peaky, like she’d survived a long night of drinking without any of the fun. “Seriously baby girl, do you need anything? Steve can get you something to drink. Or crackers, I think we have crackers.”  
  
Amy shifted so she was sitting across their legs with her back against the cushions. It was a little less dangerous than the full body cuddle Bucky had pulled her into first. She still felt awful, but the warmth and the way that Bucky was massaging her neck was helping. She reached over and rubbed his temple in return. “Now you’re ordering Captain America around? You are incorrigible.”  
  
“Order Captain America around? I would never. He is far too important to be bossed around by the likes of me. But there’s this punk kid from Brooklyn that I’ve been looking after since before he was all big and strong. Him I can boss around. He sometimes forgets how to treat a lady.” Bucky kissed Amy’s wrist affectionately. This. He could handle whatever recovery had in store for him, as long as he had this. “Don’t worry I’ll make sure he spoils you right.”  
  
She wrinkled her nose and gave him a half-hearted shove. They had talked about this. She had set rules for a reason and while he wasn’t technically breaking any of them, he was coming treacherously close. “I’m a strong independent woman. I do not need cosseting.”  
  
Steve caught her hand and tugged. Amy tipped over so her torsos was aligned with theirs again. He kept their fingers intertwined and kissed her knuckles. “Everyone needs cosseting sometimes.”  
  
*****  
  
There was a trilling coming from somewhere in the room. There was a strange trilling coming from somewhere in the room. Bucky couldn’t locate the source. Every time he got close the noise moved.  
  
“Buck?” Steve groaned and rolled over. “Why is your wrist flashing? Where’s Amy?”  
  
“My? Fuck.” It was the bracelet. Shuri must be trying to get a hold of him. He scrambled to flick the glowing bead into his hand. “Sorry princess, I obviously don’t understand how modern technology works.”  
  
“My technology is so far beyond modern it shouldn’t be a surprise. I just wanted to update you on the scans from yesterday. It took a while for my computer to edit out the Ambassador. We will need to come up with a better solution for next time. Other than that, there is a lot of hardware jammed into your skull. I don’t think it is all active and it looks like you healed around most of it. My best bet is something is shorting out and that’s what is causing at least some of your attacks. Give me some time to figure out what everything does. Some of it is probably for your arm and I can piggyback on it to build you a new one. That way you won’t have to learn a new interface.”  
  
“I don’t want a new arm.” He had hated the old one, and he was sure it was responsible for some of his attacks. The sharp jolts of pain that proceed the worst of them always started on the left.  
  
The holographic Shuri waved away his protests. “Mine will be better than your old one. I'll build it. You can decide later.”  
  
Bucky lay back against Steve exhausted by the day already. And where was Amy?


	39. The Worst Plan Nat and Amy Have Ever Come Up With

“That’s your plan.” Amy blinked at the dojo ceiling. A long training session had left both her and Natasha pleasantly tired but mentally energised. At least Amy felt energised. Natasha was apparently deranged. They were supposed to be laying here figuring out how to get Shuri the information she needed to figure out what was going on in Bucky’s brain. If they wanted to spend the rest of their lives chained to a wall being tortured for information, they could just turn themselves in. It would be more efficient, and Amy wouldn’t have to eat borscht.  
  
“That’s my plan.” Nat kind of hated it too. It was the last place she wanted to go. It was also the only place they could get the information they needed.  
  
“Steve’s going to kill us.”  
  
“Probably.” Nat agreed. “United front?”  
  
Amy rubbed her eyes. She didn’t have a better plan. If there was anywhere else, they would already have the scans. “At least he'll be quick about it.”  
  
*****  
  
A stunned silence gripped Shuri’s lab and its occupants. Amy and Natasha sat side by side at one of the worktables. Shoulders square, backs straight, matching determined expressions on their faces. Across the table from them the rest of their team was in various states of shock.  
  
Shuri had dropped her pen four minutes ago. T'Challa and Okoye had moved closer to her protectively. Nakia looked like she’d been smacked in the back of the head.  
  
Bucky had crushed a glass during the first five minutes of the explanation and hadn’t looked away from Nat's face for longer than it took to blink since.  
  
Steve had started pacing around the point they finished laying out the challenges with their proposal. “You want to break into the Leviathan Archives, and _that’s_ your plan.”  
  
“That is the plan we came up with, yes.” Natasha said. She didn’t let even a hint of emotion creep into her voice. They had to be coldly calculating about this. Fear and anxiety could wait until they had achieved their goal.  
  
“It’s terrible.” Steve wasn’t going to yell. Yelling wouldn’t help anyone. Neither would getting them all killed. Although the girls seemed to disagree. That was exactly what this plan would do, get the four of them killed. They didn’t want to call in Sam or Wanda, he couldn’t decide if that was a good thing or a bad thing.  
  
“Oh, it is the worst plan we’ve ever come up with,” Amy pulled one knee up to her chest. She understood his distress. They couldn’t go in silent. They couldn’t go in guns blazing. They couldn’t call for back up. They couldn’t even take their time and gather more intel. Nat's plan had a narrow window of opportunity, and when it closed things only got worse. “And I’m very much including the one that got me killed in that.”  
  
Steve slumped into his chair and rubbed his face. If this was the best plan the girls could come up with, this was the best plan. He’d gone over the original intel. He couldn’t do any better. “It’s your brain Buck. Your life. It has to be your call.”  
  
Bucky fiddled with the largest remaining shard of his glass. There were two options. The girls plan, or leave him the way he was. And he couldn’t stay the way her was. The way he was, was a threat to everyone in this room and a good chunk of the people outside it too.  
  
Which meant that wasn’t really an option at all.  
  
“I’m gonna need that new arm.”  
  
*****  
  
Volgograd was a miserable place in October. The Soviet architecture was oppressive. Everything was dreary and grey. The giant statues were probably dramatic in the summer, they were just bleak at this time of year. It wasn’t raining, but it had the night before and the damp concrete chilled Steve to the bone as he stretched out on the office buildings roof.  
  
Steve did his best not to fidget. It would be fine. The girls knew what they were talking about. Just because he hated this idea didn’t mean it wouldn’t work. He did hate it though. A lot.  
  
Bucky reached over and set a hand on Steve’s back. Rubbing small soothing circles with his new glossy black hand. He understood. Steve always worried about his team, but little Fox had earned a special level of worry. And sitting up here must make him feel especially helpless.  
  
At least Bucky had his scope to keep him in the loop. Or as in the loop as you could be three blocks away and twenty stories up. From here he had full view of the plaza, a clear shot at most of the lobby of their target and he could see Amy mingling with the lunch crowd from the surrounding building as they tried to pretend it wasn’t cold yet and enjoy their breaks. She looked to so small and delicate down there. A pearl on a pebble Beach. Her civilian clothing offered none of the protection of the mission gear the rest of them were wearing. He couldn’t let appearances fool him. His little Fox was fierce and strong. She had to be, or she would never have survived her first run in with him.  
  
On the far side of the plaza, Amy made her move. Swiping an access card off a passing employee, she walked confidently through the doors and proxed herself into the lobby. Bucky could see from here that the whole thing was sloppy. Amy was moving too fast. She wasn’t blending in. The lift hadn’t been smooth. The analyst noticed. Someone yelled. An alarm went off.  
  
Amy started to run.  
  
A pair of guards closed in on her.  
  
Bucky tightened his grip on the barrel of his sniper rifle. Hold. He had to hold.  
  
Amy seemed to panic, swivelling on her heel and trying to break for the other door. And running directly into a second pair of guards. The guards grabbed her arms and lifted her off her feet carrying her away. Deeper into the building. She struggled. Bucky could see her mouth opening and closing as she screamed.  
  
Five more steps and he wouldn’t have an angle on them anymore. Bucky stayed frozen. Two more steps. One. Bucky took his eye away from the scope. “They have her.”  
  
Steve took a long slow breath. Pressing himself into the hard concrete of the roof to stop the world from spinning. “Start the first timer.”  
  
*****  
  
Zip ties. They had the gall to try and restrain her with zip ties. Ayame was torn between being grateful that this would be easy and insulted that they thought it would hold her. She flicked a tiny ceramic blade out of the inside of the cocktail ring they had neglected to take off her and started work on freeing herself.  
  
She had a limited amount of time before one of the guards decided they wanted play with their new prisoner, or her interrogator showed up. One would be reasonably easy to deal with the other would blow her cover in the most frustrating manner. She probably shouldn’t even dismember someone out of irrigation. Steve was sensitive about that sort of thing.  
  
Regardless of who showed up first she had to keep up appearances as long as she was alone in the cell. Which meant huddling in the corner of her bench and whimpering pathetically. With a lifetime of training in how to look like she if feeling the exact opposite of what she’s actually feeling behind her, the deception hardly required any of Amy’s attention to maintain. She was perfectly aware of what she looked like in the moment and confident that no one was about to see through her. No one ever saw through her. Except her boys. They were infuriatingly good at figuring it what she was thinking.  
  
Not that she could dwell on that right now. The zip tie around her wrists snapped, and she snagged it before it could hit the bench. Right now, she was working.  
  
*****  
  
“Time?” It felt like a lifetime. Steve had been counting heartbeats, but his pulse was erratic right now. Spiking anytime the thought about what could be happening inside.  
  
“Plus seventeen minutes.” Bucky said without looking away from his scope. Seventy-two carefully controlled breaths down, two-hundred and four to go. He let himself take another one. Long slow inhale. Hold for four seconds. Long slow exhale. Hold for four seconds.  
  
Six minutes in. Even less time than Steve had thought. He couldn’t wait any longer, he needed to know what was happening. Steve touched the transmit button on his earpiece. “Nat check in.”  
  
“I’m in a vent. The same vent I’ve been in for the better part of an hour and will be in for the next.” There was a pause while she checked her read outs. “Sixteen minutes. It is very boring. I promise to let you know if it gets exciting.”  
  
That was good. Nat was still safely in position. As long as everything else was going as well as that was, they might be able to pull this off. “Did you get--“  
  
“If you finish that sentence, I will tell Vixen you doubted her.” Nat cut him off before he could finish the thought. “The data transmission came through right on schedule. I have codes to get us into every room in the building.”  
  
Steve let his shoulders slump and tried to control his breathing. When he looked up again Bucky had pulled a pill bottle from one of his pockets and was holding it in front of his face. “What’s this?”  
  
“Shuri's doctors gave them to me. For anxiety.” Bucky didn’t look away from his scope with its view of the lobby. He didn’t want to be the one to miss something, but Steve needed to calm down before he let his worry for the girls blow this whole thing... Girl. Bucky didn’t think it was _Ryzhiy_ in her vent that had Steve so on edge. “Take one before you vibrate through the roof.”  
  
*****  
  
Amy had curled herself into a tight foetal position. It was awkward with her hands behind her back. Her wrists may be free, but she couldn’t just go waving them around without giving the game away. She just hoped her guards had no idea how uncomfortable the position actually was. She didn’t need them thinking about the fact she could reach the bindings on her legs while she was curled up like this.  
  
She stopped with a sliver of plastic still holding the zip ties around her ankles. An easily snappable sliver.  
  
Amy kept up the charade of sobbing helplessly, one half closed eye on the door. Discipline was good here. She’d expected a visitor by now. Maybe she wouldn’t have to do this the hard way.  
  
*****  
  
“The Defence Minister's still not here.” Steve checked the time again. Negative two minutes. Maybe their estimates had been off. Maybe he wasn’t coming at all. Maybe they had smuggled Amy out a back exit and she was on her way to some black sight where they could torture her at their leisure. “What’s the chatter say?”  
  
“Traffic on the bridge. It isn’t time to panic yet.” Bucky said soothingly. It wasn’t. They had three and a half minutes before they had to start packing. Steve didn’t need to stress. Bucky was more than ready to panic when the time came.  
  
*****  
  
The lock on Amy's cell clicked and she flinched backwards. They would expect her to be afraid of that sound. So, she would be afraid.  
  
Two guards entered, speaking low and in Russian. “ _Are you sure we have to move her? I bet we could get all the information they want out of her if they gave us a chance._ ”  
  
Amy resisted the urge to roll her eyes. Everyone thought there was one good way to get information out of a female prisoner and they were all wrong.  
  
“ _You want to piss off the Defence Minister be my guest. He ordered me to take her to the interrogation room and get her ready, that’s what I’m going to do._ ”  
  
The tiniest of smiles quirked the corner of Amy’s lips. That meant he was here. She loved it when a plan came together.  
  
The first guard reached for her.  
  
Amy let her small smile grow. Now for the fun part.  
  
*****  
  
A fleet of cars pulled up in front of the building. Four jeeps and a sleep black sedan. Spetsnaz poured from the jeeps, scanning the area for threats. One of them gave the all clear. The Defence Minister stepped out and looked around.  
  
Bucky smiled, his cheek pressing against his rifle. “He's here.”  
  
Steve’s tension turned to readiness. The damn plan was working. “Timer two running. Nat you’re on.”  
  
“Already moving.” Nat shot back.  
  
Steve didn’t hear and sounds of movement on her end, but he wouldn’t expect to. Nat was better at her job than that.  
  
*****  
  
Amy stepped over a fourth body. Just unconscious. She’d been careful with her carnage. Nothing Steve would disapprove of. It did feel good to stretch after so much inactivity though.  
  
The question now, was where had they put her things? She wasn’t about to go wandering a hostile building barefoot with no weapons and no way to contact her team if she didn’t have to.  
  
She found what she was looking for in a clear plastic tray on the Sergeant's desk. Shoes. Knives. Radio. All carefully catalogued and waiting. The phone was missing, but she had expected that. Counted on it, in fact.  
  
Amy popped her earpiece back in. “Miss me?”  
  
Bucky’s dark chuckle greeted her. “You know we did baby girl. Steve’s on his way to get Nat out of her vent, then you’re up. I’ll see you in a few.”  
  
“Do you have a clear shot at the target area?” Steve asked, keeping his voice low as he scrambled down the side of the building.  
  
Amy took a quick look down the hall as she slipped her shoes back on. Two more guards waited at the end with submachine guns slung across their bodies. They weren’t alerted to the situation in the prisoners’ cells yet. She still had the element of surprise. “I’m not seeing any insurmountable obstacles.”  
  
*****  
  
Steve charged down the hallway towards the security centre. He was rushing. That was bad. Rushing was how you made sloppy mistakes. He didn’t really care as long as he got confirmation that Amy was alright. Why had he agreed to this plan in the first place? The ‘fake’ part of fake capture was too tenuous for him to be comfortable relying on it. At least when he wasn’t the one being captured.  
  
He skidded around a corner. There she was. Dark hair dishevelled from her abduction, but otherwise unhurt from the looks of it. He slowed. He couldn’t just go barrelling into her. There was a plan. One that would protect all of them in the end.  
  
Amy swore internally. Steve was too good at his job. He was early. They'd be off Camera. Or at least she would. Maybe that was better. It might feel more natural.  
  
“Steve?” Amy let a healthy dose of conflict lace the name.  
  
Steve pulled up short. Freezing in the middle of the hallway. Surprise distorting his features. “Amy? What are you…”  
  
Amy had to hand it to him. He was a pretty good actor. She almost believed their both being here was a coincidence. “I thought…. It doesn’t matter. Steve you need to turn yourself in. They’re looking for you. And if they find you, they have orders to kill you. All of you.”  
  
“Sounds like I shouldn’t let them find me.” Steve aimed for teasing. He knew it ended up more gruff than charming. That was fine.  
  
“This is serious Steve.” Amy sounded upset. She was upset. She hated thinking that someone might hurt Nat or either of her boys. They were good people. They deserved to be happy and safe. “Come with me. We can figure something out.”  
  
Steve looked at her sadly. “I’m sorry Amy. I can’t let them get their hands on Bucky or Wanda.”  
  
Amy covered her face just before the flash bang went off. When she looked back up Steve was gone. Amy smiled internally and took off ‘after’ Steve. She knew he had gone the other way. It was hopefully whoever watched the security footage would have a harder time deciphering where he had gone.  
  
The facility guards shouldn’t have to wonder too long though. Steve and Natasha were about to make a fuss on the other side of the complex. Hopefully the kind of fuss that left the Defence Minister with a snapped neck, although she could always tackle that herself later.  
  
*****  
  
“Well?” Nat asked as Steve re-joined her in the hall leading to the archives.  
  
“Well what?” Steve rubbed his temples and tried to resist the urge to pester Bucky or Amy for updates. They needed to maintain radio silence as much possible.  
  
Nat rolled her eyes. Did Steve forget he didn’t have his mic set to open broadcast? If she wasn’t standing next to him, she had no idea what he had been up to. The plan called for him and Amy to put on a little skit for the benefit of the wider intelligence community. The question was whether or not it had worked. “Well how did it go?”  
  
“I threw a flash bang at her and left her alone in the middle of an overturned ant hill, where it is entirely probable, they will decide it is easier to kill her than recapture her.” Steve growled. Had he mentioned that he hated this plan? “How do you think it went?”  
  
Nat thought that was exactly how it was supposed to go. She patted Steve on the shoulder. Poor Cap. Still so out of his depth. “She’s not alone Bucky’s on his way to her.”  
  
“That thought doesn’t help as much as you think it might.” Steve grumbled squaring up to the door. Bucky had always been a magnet for trouble. He hated to think what Bucky and Amy would get up to without supervision. The sooner they found what they were looking for the sooner they could all get out of here.  
  
He kicked in the door with a crash. Sending the archival staff skittering away. There was something viscerally satisfying about going in loud.  
  
Nat winged one of the fleeing workers on the arm. That should have them appropriately terrified and hopefully get them running to the right people.  
  
*****  
  
Amy found Bucky at the same time an explosion went off in the main security office. That was the cameras taken care of.  
  
If they had asked, Amy would have told them not to try and access any of the data on the phone they’d picked her up with. No one had asked her. It was hardly her fault if they couldn’t tell the difference between a protective case and nano explosives. They probably also wouldn’t notice the digital worm they had downloaded when they plugged her phone into a computer. Not a problem if they were smart and initially loaded everything onto a properly air gapped system, but that would take several extra steps and people could be so lazy about theses things.  
  
From his place next to the stairway door Bucky gave Amy a quick once over. Steve had definitely started to panic too soon. His little Fox was absolutely thriving in these conditions. It was kind of attractive.  
  
Bucky passed Amy the gear bag he’d brought with him. “Here you go, baby girl. Time to slip into something a little more comfortable.”  
  
“They took the bait then?” Amy asked stripping her civilian shirt over her head.  
  
“Looks like they completely forgot you were here. Steve and _Ryzhiy_ are pretty distracting.” Under other circumstances Bucky would be thrilled at the opportunity to watch Amy change. Right now, he was more worried about other people interrupting them. People with guns. He kept his head on a swivel, scanning for threats as she slipped into something more practical.  
  
“I am really starting to feel insulted by how little these people think of me.” Amy fished her actual phone out of the side pocket of the bag and checked for messages. Nothing. Nothing meant no one had informed the Americans she had been captured yet. Good. She wanted to let them know on her terms.  
  
The phone went into an inside pocket on her quilted gi jacket. Her two swords hung neatly on her left hip. A dozen throwing knives lined the rest of her belt. Amy tucked in the end of the cloth that covered her face and she was ready.  
  
Bucky took the bag back and slung it across his back. Amy didn’t need the extra weight. “Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth. We still have documents to collect.” There were a lot of stairs between here and where they needed to be.  



	40. From Bad to Worse

Nat scanned the archives shelves hopefully. The floor to ceiling shelves were lined with file boxes all neatly labelled in Russian. Dates of operations. Commanding officers. Scientists in charge of projects. “You have anything.”  
  
Steve flicked through the old-fashioned card catalogue. They might think that sticking with analogue kept their files more secure, but Steve had spent a good chunk of the forties riffling card catalogues to find intelligence. He might not be fluent in Russian. But he knew every key word that could be associated with Bucky by heart. “No. It looks like Amy was right and they didn’t keep his files where anyone could just stumble across them”  
  
Natasha sighed. They had known that this was a wild goose chase. Amy and Bucky were the ones with a real shot at the prize. Still it would have been nice to have something to show for their trouble. She ducked down an aisle with older boxes. It never hurt to be thorough. They had time to kill.  
  
“Captain Rogers. A pleasure to have you with us.” The Defence Minister entered the archive. Walking calmly with a pair of bodyguards flanking him.  
  
Steve slid the drawer he was looking in closed. Show time. “Minister. I think you know why I’m here.”  
  
The Defence Minister nodded. “The new experiments. I am curious how you found out.”  
  
Steve’s hand tightened on the corner of the cabinet. That wasn’t the answer he had expected. He summoned up Amy and Nat's lessons in how to reverse interrogate someone. Rule one. Don’t lie if you don’t have to. “I think the real question is why it took us so long to find out.”  
  
A pair of electric darts caught the guards in the neck. The dropped to the floor twitching and unconscious.  
  
Natasha stepped up behind the Defence Minister and levelled her gun at his head. “Let’s skip the pleasantries.”  
  
“Agent Romanov.” The Defence Minister didn’t seem concerned. “I agree, far better to cut to the chase.”  
  
The two squads of Spetsnaz burst into the room. Battle rifles at the ready. There was a beat while they took up positions. And they opened fire.  
  
Nat ducked behind a set of shelves and started working her way back towards Steve.  
  
Steve shoved over the card catalogues next to him to give them a shooting position. He dropped to one knee and fired into the crowd to cover her. Well just over the crowd. They were just doing their job. They didn’t need to die for it.  
  
Natasha vaulted the tipped over cabinets and slid down next to Steve breathing hard. “You know. I think we may have rushed recon on this.”  
  
Steve spared a half second to glare at her.  
  
Nat flipped over onto her stomach and resumed her fire. Picking of Spetsnaz’s with neat shots to the shoulder. It was efficient. Hit them just next to their vests and even the toughest went down or fell back.  
  
Steve opted for more of a suppressing style of fire. Aiming mostly above their heads or at their knees.  
  
The fire fight looked like it might dissolve into a war of attrition. Steve and Nat had better aim. But they were grossly outnumbered, and their cover left a lot to be desired. If nothing changed, they were going to be pinned down until one side ran out of ammo.  
A palm sized silver cylinders arced over the card catalogues.  
  
Steve and Nat registered the bomb for what it was at the same time. Nat threw herself into Steve’s arms. Steve threw them both behind a desk.  
  
Steve curled himself protectively over Nat just at the bomb exploded. The blast drove the desk hard into his left side. The side that would normally have been protected by his shield. Light blinded him. The boom made his ears ring.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky let out a long slow breath. Something about this basement had him on edge. It didn’t make sense. There was no sign of the expected troops. Just three doors. _Utility. Janitor. Soldier._ Bucky quickly discounted the first two. The third door was the one they wanted. He listened carefully for signs of life before he kicked it open.  
  
A ball of hot fear clutched at Bucky’s chest. This was a very bad place for him to be. Sitting in the centre of the room, sickly green and ominous…  
  
One of his chairs.  
  
He couldn’t breathe. Couldn’t move. Couldn’t do anything other than silently panic.  
  
“Hey.”  
  
A hand grabbed his shoulder and wrenched him around. As soon as the chair left his vision, he gasped for breath. His knees felt like jelly. His heart hammered in his chest.  
  
Amy cupped Bucky’s face and made him look directly into her eyes. “You don’t have to go anywhere near it, okay? You don’t even have to look at it. I’m not going to let anything happen to you.”  
  
Bucky let the power of her eyes center him. No sparks of magic this time. Just the force of a real human connection.  
  
Amy ran her hands over his head. Gently massaging his scalp to help him find himself again. He needed something to do. Something to keep his attention off the chair and what it represented. “Hold the hall. I’ll get what we came for.”  
  
Bucky nodded and shouldered his rifle. He could do that. He could hold the hall for his little Fox. She would be safe while she worked. Nothing would happen to her either.  
  
*****  
  
Amy hoped that the chair had distracted Bucky from what she personally considered to be the rooms more concerning features. Primarily the fact it had been recently cleaned and restocked. It had been years since Bucky had been anywhere near this base. This room should be covered in dust sheets. There definitely shouldn’t be fresh medical supplies on the shelves. Someone was using this room. That was not a comforting thought. They needed to get out of here as soon as possible.  
  
The upside to the room being in active use was the files and scans they were looking for were all neatly organised in the filing cabinet. It took less than a minuet for Amy to sort what they needed from the chaff and set fire to the rest.  
  
Amy a small brick of nano explosives to the chair. Taking extra care to make sure the detonator was secure. No one needed it anymore. The noise would draw attention. It would also create a distraction for Steve and Nat. It was more than worth the risk. Plus, it had upset Bucky.  
  
She took a few extra seconds to scan and upload all the hardcopy files with her phone. She had the same distaste for putting all her eggs in one basket that Natasha did.  
  
*****  
  
The ringing in Steve’s ears started to fade. The spots dazzling his eyes popped out one by one. He gave his head another shake to clear it and eased himself off Nat. His back and side were one huge bruise. Bucky was going to tell him off for forgetting he didn’t have his shield anymore.  
  
Nat rolled to her feet. Sweeping the wreckage of the room carefully for remaining enemies. They were alone. She moved among the few bodies littering the floor, flipping them over with her foot. None of them were the Defence Minister.  
  
Nat let her gun fall to her side. “Shit. We lost him.”  
  
Steve swore and stepped forward, babying his side where the desk had caught him. “How did he get out?”  
  
Nat pushed on a suspiciously soot free section of wall. It swung freely. “Hidden door.”  
  
“How the hell did we miss a hidden door?” Steve kicked a fallen bookshelf in frustration.  
  
“I was a little distracted by the guys shooting at me.” Nat snapped back. It was time to retreat and regroup. Amy and her _Otets_ were on their own. She was not looking forward to dragging Steve out of here kicking and screaming when he figured that part out.  
  
*****  
  
The door marked utilities burst open. Bucky swore to himself. He was off his game. Being off his game could get them all killed. He knew all the utility tunnels in the complex were connected. There were a series of security doors that locked when a building went into lockdown, but they could be opened by anyone with high enough clearance. The alarm might not have gone off, but someone knew, or at least suspected, that they were here. Bucky swore and prayed that Steve and Natasha were alright. He dropped the first two Spetsnaz before they made it all the way through the door.  
  
A more intimidating figure stepped over their bodies.  
  
The Defence Minister had found him.  
  
The Defence Minister had a copy of the book ready and open. “ _Zhelaniye, rzhavyy, semnadtsat’, rassvet, pech’, devyat’, dobroserdechny, vozvrashcheniye na rodinu, odin, gruzovoy vagon_.”  
  
Bucky’s rifle clattered to the floor. He clutched his head. It hurt. It hurt so much. The pain would go away if he let it. If he fell into the darkness the pain would go away. He knees gave out and he crumpled in on himself. He couldn’t do this. Not here. Not now. Steve. _Ryzhiy_. Amy. If Hydra took him now, they would all be in danger. If they were lucky, they would die. He would kill them. It they weren’t lucky they would get to share his chair.  
  
“Would you please stop tormenting my soldier.” Amy stepped into the room, her sword loose in her hand.  
  
“What are you doing with him Fox?” The Defence Minister spat the accusation at her.  
  
“He’s mine now.” Amy answered coldly, carefully positioning herself between the Defence Minister and Bucky’s huddled form. Throwing knives held between the fingers of her right hand. “Hydra shouldn’t leave their toys laying around if they don’t want someone else to pick them up.”  
  
A throwing knife caught the first Spetsnaz to level a gun at her in the throat. He went down gurgling. Of the next three, one got a knife to the eye, one got a long sword slash across the torso from collarbone to groin cutting straight through his Kevlar body armour, and the last was hamstrung before Amy severed his spinal cord. The smooth violent motions carried Amy to within a few feet of the Defence Minister and cleared the space around where Bucky was struggling to maintain control. Behind the Defence Minister, the remaining Spetsnaz struggled to regroup. Their squad commander had been one of the men Amy had taken out and his lieutenant’s barked orders weren’t rallying the survivors the way they should. It was clear they weren’t used to being decimated by a single opponent like this certainly not by a lone girl without a gun.  
  
Bucky dug the fingers of his metal hand into the floor. That was Amy. He could hear Amy fighting.  
  
The Defence Minister fired his pistol into the ceiling to silence the panicking men. He lowered the weapon until it was pointed directly at Amy’s chest. A smirk flitted across Amy’s lips. He knew that the quickest way to end the fear of a monster was to shoot it through the heart. That was why his government had made him a Defence Minister in the first place. The question was, had he learned the next lesson? Did he know what happened when shooting the monster didn’t work?  
  
That lesson was one of Amy’s favourites.  
  
“Dear silly fool. You'll never be able to hit me from there.” Amy walked forward until the barrel of his gun was pressed against her sternum. She closed her hand over his so he couldn’t pull away. “There. You need to get nice and close if you want to hit a Fox.” All eyes were fixed on her. Good. She could hear movement behind her. A slow smile spread across her face. Bucky was coming to. “Hesitating was a serious mistake too.”  
  
Fear flickered in her captor’s eyes. He hadn’t noticed the movement, but he could tell from her change of expression that something had happened. “Why? You think you can kill me before I pull this trigger?” He did an admirable job covering the fear. His voice was steady. Amy could feel the hand she was holding quivering just a little.  
  
“No.” Amy said gently. The crack of a gunshot sounded. A bullet flashed over her shoulder and struck the Defence Minister between the eyes. A second one followed before he could drop. “But he can.”  
  
Six more shots sounded and three more of the men in the room slumped to the ground with matching bullet wounds in their skulls. The rest broke and ran, crashing into each other in their haste to get back into the tunnels.  
  
Amy wiped a spot of blood off her cheek. A very neat job. “Feeling better?”  
  
“Much.” Bucky stepped up next to her reloading his handgun. He prodded the body at her feet with a toe. This time the Defence Minister was definitely dead. He plucked the book out of a growing pool of blood. The thick red liquid hardly even showing on the cover. It never did. “He could have killed you. What would you have done if I hadn’t pulled my self together?”  
  
“You did, so it doesn’t matter.” Amy said retrieving her throwing knives. Her hand had been on the Defence Minister, skin to skin. She could have used her powers to stop him pulling the trigger. Odds were the gun would have miss fired anyway. They tended to do that when they were aimed at her.  
  
Bucky took two lunging steps towards Amy and pulled her into a tight hug. “You weren’t supposed to put yourself in danger for me. Not like that.”  
  
Amy wrapped her arms around him and pressed her cheek into his chest. He didn’t need to know how scared she had been that her spur of the moment plan wouldn’t work. That the Defence Minister would take her out and recapture him. “I’m not about to lose you just because some asshole can read a book.”  
  
Amy’s earpiece had fallen out during the fray. She could hear a muffled voice coming from it where it dangled near her shoulder. She shifted in Bucky’s arms until she could pop it back in.  
  
A very angry Steve greeted her. It sounded like he had been trying to get a hold of them fore awhile. “…God damn it Vixen. Check in. Or so help me I’ll--“  
  
“Take a deep breath Steven. You’re going to hyper ventilate.” Amy replied in a soothing tone. “We’re on our way out.”  
  
Bucky turned his radio back on to figure out how bad it was. Steve sounded pissed. There was something very familiar about Steve getting mad at his team for doing something reckless. His boy was such a hypocrite. Bucky smiled and stroked the small of Amy’s back with his metal hand. That was alright. Between the two of them, he and his little Fox could manage Steve. “We’re alright Stevie. We’ll see you at the exfil.”  
  
*****  
  
There were no complications with getting out of the building. Steve and Natasha made it to the truck they had commandeered to get them to their pickup in the countryside. There had been a long lecture about ‘going dark without telling anyone’ courtesy of Steve. Bucky had smirked through the entire thing while Amy texted Dai and made a show of the fact she wasn’t really paying attention.  
  
Now Bucky was sitting in the back seat with his little girl tucked under his arm. Natasha leaned into her _Otets’_ side and flipped through the files Amy had retrieved. Steve drove, careful to stick to the speed limit and not draw any attention to them.  
  
“What do you think he meant by 'new experiments'?” Nat asked walking her phone between her fingers. It was a worrying thought. The Defence Minister's experiments were the sort that changed the face to the world. He was on the team that had attempted to create more Winter Soldiers. His predecessor’s experiments had led to her.  
  
“No idea.” Amy said without looking up from her phone. "My bet would be whatever they did to Rumlow."  
  
Steve adjusted the rear-view mirror. He hadn’t liked that part either. “We’ll look into it.”  
  
“ _On bol'she ne mozhet prichinit' nam bol', malysh_.” Bucky kissed her hair reassuringly.  
  
Steve made a few more turns, taking them towards the outskirts.  
  
Amy’s head came up as they drove down a street lined with seedy looking buildings. “Pull over here I need to make a stop.”  
  
Bucky followed her eye line. His heart stopped. This was not a place Amy should be wandering around alone. Tough as his little Fox was, there were some things you couldn’t fight your way out of. “That’s the bar the Interpol station chief drinks at.”  
  
Amy fixed her hair in the side mirror. “I know. He’s who I need to see.”  
  
Steve carefully parallel parked. He knew where she was going with this. “This is how she makes our run in real.”  
  
“I don’t like it.” Bucky grumbled. It left her uncomfortably exposed. What if he tried to arrest her? None of them could go in after her. She wasn’t supposed to know where they were.  
  
“You don’t have to. Back in ten.” Amy blew a kiss over her shoulder as she hopped out of the car.  
  
*****  
  
Amy leaned casually against the edge of the bar. The surface was sticky with spilled liquor under her elbows. Even in her civilian office wear she was horribly overdressed. This early in the day there were only a few other patrons. The man closest to her was nursing a pint of weak beer. Amy batted her eyes at him. “What’s a girl got to do to get a drink around here?”  
  
“What are you doing here, goddess?” The station chief didn’t look up from his drink.  
  
“My job. Which you would know if you were doing yours.” Amy turned around and signalled the bar tender. Looked like she was buying her own drink.  
  
The chief set down his drink. “Your job brought you to Vogalgrad?”  
  
“ _Vodka. Make it a double._ ” Amy told the bartender in Russian. She dropped a few bills on the counter before turning towards the chief. “One of them. Winter Soldier research. It looks like I wasn’t the only one interested in that particular subject. I ran into Captain America.”  
  
“Why tell me?” The chief lifted his beer again. His hand shaking slightly.  
  
Amy shrugged languidly and sipped her drink. He should be afraid. Steve as an enemy was a dangerous thing, and where he went the Winter Soldier and the Black Widow went. “I had to tell someone. CIA has Ploughman based here; we don’t get along. And you know the only MI5 agent I will talk to is Whitman.”  
  
The chief sighed into his beer. “Walk me through what happened.”  
  
Amy swirled the clear liquid in her class. It was simple really. “I was trying to get into the archives, you know the ones. Ran into Captain Rogers. He was not overly pleased to see me. We had a disagreement over whether he and the rest of his team should turn themselves in. He made a very persuasive argument. I took his point.”  
  
“Slept with you and left without saying goodbye?” The chief snorted.  
  
Amy shrugged. It was a fair comment. It was what she had done to him. It wasn’t what had happened with Steve. “Threw a grenade at me and used the chaos to lose me.”  
  
“Shit.” The chief said softly, glass halfway to his mouth.  
  
“Anyway, you’re filled in.” Amy tossed the last of her drink down her throat. “I’m going home to lick my wounds.”  
  
“I could help with that.” He glanced slyly at her out of the corner of his eye.  
  
Amy shook her head and shoved away from the bar. As a rule, she didn’t sleep with the same guy more than once. They start to expect things after the second time. She wasn’t about to break that rule when she had Steve and Bucky waiting in the car. She didn’t need to have sex with them to get more out of a night in bed with them than one with most of her boy toys. “You had your chance Liam. It was B- work at best.”  
  
“Happy Haloween goddess.” Liam called without turning away from the bar.  
  
“Still not American.” Amy shot back. There was a mirror over that bar. Not turning didn’t mean he wasn’t watching her. Very few of the men who had slept with her could resist watching her walk away.


	41. Slips in Self Control

Nat took Amy’s half of the files when they landed. She would drop them off with Shuri before she crashed for the night. And crash she would. There was nothing Nat liked better after a mission than a solid twelve hours sleep in a dark room with fresh sheets and her white noise machine. First, they had to get everything uploaded and see if Shuri could use any of what they had found.  
  
Steve and Bucky leaned on each other, arms around shoulders, heads together, as they followed Amy back to their rooms. Steve’s heart sang with relief. They'd all made it back. No one was hurt. Best of all they’d managed to get their hands on everything they were looking for. He let himself relax in the safety of the Wakandan palace. And if he indulged watching the figure eight sway of the tip of Amy’s swords, well, it would be hypnotic even without the matching sway of her perky ass.  
  
Amy shed her sword belt in the living room. She wondered if Bucky would insist on cuddling or if she could slip away for a few minuets before bed. She desperately needed some endorphins to help her shake off the last off the combination of panic and blood lust that were still coursing through her veins. Her vibrator, the shower, and fifteen uninterrupted minutes would solve the problem, even if that option was a little clinical.  
  
Steve was relaxed. Amy had started her post battle wind down. Stretching out her limbs in a way he would love to sit down and watch for a while. He didn’t think she’d go for that though. Under his arm he could feel Bucky practically vibrating. He didn’t think it was because Bucky was watching Amy. “How you doin Buck?”  
  
He didn’t know how he was doing. He’d gone up against he Defence Minister. The Defence Minister had tried to trigger him. A quick and dirty field reboot, but it was still a trigger. And it hadn’t worked. It had hurt like hell. He’d blacked out for a second. But he’d never lost control. “It didn’t work. They couldn’t touch me. I’m free.”  
  
“You’re free.” Amy echoed. Free and if the scans helped the way she hoped they would, soon neither of them would need her.  
  
“No one is ever going to control you again Buck.” Steve squeezed Bucky’s hand reassuringly. He’d make sure of that, and so would the girls.  
  
A flash passed behind Bucky’s eyes a realisation of something else. If they couldn’t touch him, he wasn’t a threat to his friends anymore. He could do whatever he wanted without worrying that he was going to be captured and have to kill the people he cared about. “Reach for something you want, rather than run away from something you’re scared of.”  
  
“That’s right.” Amy smiled at Steve. Bucky was all in for him now. No more fear. They would be happy together. So happy together. She just had to get out of their way.  
  
Steve’s eyes flicked between the two of them in confusion. They were obviously following up on an earlier conversation that he hadn’t been privy to. But what was it about? And why didn’t Amy’s smile quite reach her eyes.  
  
Bucky grabbed the back of Amy’s head and pulled her in for a fierce kiss. With his other hand he tugged Steve closer. What he wanted was everything. He wrapped his arm around Steve’s waist at the same time he let Amy come up for air. Bucky turned his head and claimed Steve mouth in turn. What he wanted was everything they almost had.  
  
Amy melted into the V made by the two men. Her knees weak and her heart pounding in her chest. The only reason she was still standing were the arms holding her against them. Above her head she could feel Steve and Bucky kissing.  
  
Steve cupped the back of Amy’s head and turned her face up so he could kiss her. Screw the people who thought he was the man with a plan. His plans were terrible. Bucky’s plans on the other hand. Bucky's plans were fucking great. At least as long as Amy was as on board as they were. “Sex?”  
  
“Sex.” Amy breathed. It was just sex. And she needed it right now.  
  
“Thank fuck.” Bucky growled kissing down Amy’s neck. He slipped an arm under her ass and lifted her, so she’d wrap her legs around his waist. He grabbed Steve by the belt and hauled both of them into the bedroom.  
  
He set Amy on her feet at the end of the bed. Keeping her trapped between his arms as he dragged Steve in for another kiss. The sooner he got them both out of their clothes the better. Bucky shoved Steve’s shield harness off his shoulders. He didn’t know why Steve was even wearing the thing. He popped the button on Steve’s collar one handed, the other still curled around Steve’s belt. There was a second hook an inch away from the first. Then a row of snaps that ran to the side of the jacket. Bucky fumbled with another clasp under Steve’s arm. “How many fucking fasteners does this damn thing have?”  
  
“Too many.” Amy growled tearing at the bottom of Steve’s jacket herself. She’d always hated that about his Captain America uniform. It was impossible to get off.  
  
Bucky left Steve’s infuriating jacket to Amy and started working on her clothes. They were much easier. The knot holding her jacket closed was simple and he snapped the drawstring on her pants with a quick jerk. She helped him, shimmying her hips so the pants slid to the ground. He ran a finger around the edge of her black panties. He loved the way the modern underwear hugged her smooth curves, much better than the loose flappy things of the past.  
  
At the same time Amy shoved Steve’s jacket off his shoulders and went to work on his belt. It was even more frustrating that the jacket was. She would like to have a word with whatever S.H.I.E.L.D. designer had failed to consider that someone might need to get Steve out of his pants in a hurry. She would forgive them for not anticipating the complication that was Bucky running his hands over her while she tried to work. It was a fairly unique situation. She fumbled a few times when Bucky found a particularly sensitive spot, but she managed to get the belt and pants undone before Steve took pity on her and stripped the rest of the way off himself.  
  
Bucky peeled Amy’s undershirt over her head. Disappointingly she wasn’t wearing one of the pretty lacy sheer things that so entranced him. This stretchy black sports bra was just keeping him from what he was sure were perfect perky nipples. He shoved it up and off as well. Leaving Amy in only her pretty panties and Steve completely naked.  
  
“I feel a little over dressed.” Bucky teased running his fingers over Steve’s abs.  
  
“You kinda are Buck.” Steve purred licking his lips. “Let’s get that jacket off you.” He unzipped the black jacket and dropped it on the floor. The tight shirt hugging Bucky’s torso made his mouth water.  
  
“And throw it away. I hate that makeshift thing.” Amy slid her hand up Bucky’s shirt and trailed her nails down his chiselled back. They could do better, and hopefully he wouldn’t have to be vicious anymore. With the files they had retrieved today, he should be able to stay safe and secure in Wakanda from now on. “I feel the same about this shirt for that matter.”  
  
“You want it gone? It’s gone baby girl.” He grabbed the back of his shirt and dragged it over his head. “What else?”  
  
“Hmm.” Amy studied him through her eyelashes. “I don’t much like those pants.”  
  
Bucky smirked and undid his belt. He didn’t like them very much right now either. “Do you like any of my clothes?”  
  
That smirk went straight to Amy’s nipples. Dear gods she couldn’t wait to ravage and be ravaged by these boys. “Not right now.”  
  
Bucky noticed how aroused she was.  
  
So did Steve.  
  
Bucky stepped out of his pants and into Amy’s space. He wrapped his metal arm around her waist and pressed her firmly into his side. Using the other hand to trace the curve of her collar bone. Her skin was so soft all over. “Is it selfish if I want to see a beautiful pair of lips wrapped around my dick before anything else?”  
  
Amy chuckled and ran her hands down Bucky’s chest. “I think someone has ideas along those lines.”  
  
Bucky turned to see what was amusing Amy so much.  
  
Steve was already on his knees. Smiling up at the two of them hungrily. His erection resting thick and heavy in his lap.  
  
“Steve always has the best ideas.” Bucky breathed. Lifting Amy off her feet and moving them towards Steve. A blowjob from the man he loved, while the most gorgeous woman he had ever met rubbed against him like a cat. It really was the best idea he had heard in a long time.  
  
Steve licked his lips. This hadn’t gone well the last few tries. But Bucky seemed more at ease this time. It probably helped that he had a mostly naked Amy rubbing against his side. Steve always felt better in that position. Steve curled his hand around Bucky’s shaft. He just hoped Bucky stayed in that good place long enough for Steve to make him feel even better. He licked the length of Bucky’s cock and sucked the head into his mouth.  
  
“Gods you’re pretty like that.” Amy buried her hand in Steve’s hair, making him moan around Bucky’s cock and look up at them through his lashes. “How much do you love those big blue eyes?”  
  
“So fucking much, baby girl.” Bucky purred directly into her ear. Steve looking up at him like that was a dream. One he’d had more times than he could count. One he’d lost all hope of ever realising after their first few disastrous attempts. It was real right now though, even better than most of his fantasies with the addition of Amy tucked under his arm.  
  
Steve locked his eyes on Amy’s and slowly started to move his head. The way she was looking at him was turning him on almost as much as the feeling of Bucky hot and heavy in his mouth. Her pupils had exploded, and he didn’t think she was conscious of the way she was licking her lips while she watched him. It wasn’t a show. Amy was more than a little aroused by the sight of him blowing Bucky.  
  
Bucky closed his eyes and tipped his head into Amy’s neck. Steve’s head bobbed. Everything was hot and slippery, and best of all he was still firmly in the moment. It wasn’t the most skilful blowjob he had ever received, but Steve was enthusiastic, and Bucky thought it might be the best. Top five for sure.  
  
Amy tightened the hand in Steve’s hair. “You’re going to choke if you keep doing it like that.”  
  
“You think you can do better?” Steve panted. She was absolutely right. But that didn’t mean he was about to give up.  
  
“I know I can, and so do you.” Amy slid down next to Steve.  
  
Steve grinned evilly and pulled Amy into his lap. He settled her with her knees on either side of his and her back against his chest. Bucky's cock brushed the side of her face. It was the prettiest thing Steve thought he had ever seen. Although that might be his cock talking. Setting Amy in his lap like this had trapped his erection under the curve of her ass. The soft fabric of her panties clinging to him. “That sounded like a challenge.”  
  
Bucky curled his fingers in her hair. “You show him, baby girl.”  
  
Amy gave him a couple long strokes. How did these boys both have such pretty penises? She licked a stripe up the vein on the under side of Bucky’s cock. Pretty and delicious. It really was completely unfair. She swallowed the entire length in one go.  
  
Bucky moaned at the feeling of Amy’s mouth. It was better. Baby girl knew exactly how to drive him crazy. It helped that every time she pulled off to breath Steve took over.  
  
When his mouth wasn’t full, Steve kept up a steady stream of praise for both of them. Telling them how much he loved them, how gorgeous they both were, how sexy they were fooling around like this. Bucky was looking down at him in ecstasy, and he could feel Amy soaking through her panties on his lap.  
  
He ground himself against her wetness making her moan around Bucky. They might like his sweet talk, but that was the noise that did it for him. He did it again. This time Bucky echoed her moan.  
  
“Fuck. Baby girl.” Bucky tightened the hand in Amy’s hair.  
  
“Do it Buck.” Steve purred, rolling Amy’s hips in his lap. “She’s worked hard, let her see how good she makes you feel.”  
  
Bucky swore long and fluently as he finished in Amy’s mouth.  
  
Bucky was pretty sure the image of Steve holding Amy while she sucked him was seared onto his retinas. He was more than okay with that. That was what he wanted to see when he closed his eyes. He rubbed his thumb over Amy’s cheek. Blood surging back to his groin as she looked up at him and licked her lips. Someone needed to make her moan and scream. Not him. Someone who could definitely make it all the way through without freaking out. Someone who was already kissing every inch of her he could reach while murmuring well earned praise into her skin. “Can Stevie fuck you? Please baby girl, I need to see him inside you.”  
  
Amy was aching. Steve’s teasing and sweet talk had her soaking wet. Combined with the Pavlovian way her body reacted to the taste of Bucky, she was too worked up to think straight. “Yes. Please. Steve. I want that.”  
  
Steve wasn’t an idiot. That wasn’t the kind of invitation anyone in their right mind turned down. Lifted her out of his lap with one hand and stripped her panties off with the other before setting her back in his lap, the tip of his penis resting against her soft wet opening. “You know I'll always look after you, sweetheart”  
  
Bucky knelt on the floor with them, kissing down Amy’s back to her tattoo with it’s shining white star and sweet little fox reaching around to trail his hands over Steve. Rubbing the heel of his hand from the base of Steve’s cock up to Amy’s stomach, making a point of grinding against her clit on the way.  
  
“Fuck. I don’t have a condom.” Steve had never felt so completely unprepared. Amy had been sleeping in his bed for months. Bucky had been sleeping in his bed for months. He was the one of the three who could have stopped at a pharmacy in that time. He should have picked up a box. Two boxes. He’d gotten used to Amy being responsible for them. That wasn’t fair. It took two people to mess around, three in this case, they should share the responsibility.  
  
“Neither do I.” Amy closed her eyes. She had to have one somewhere. A spare slipped into her makeup bag or in the purse she had been carrying the last time she had gone to visit Steve. She kept coming up irritatingly blank.  
  
Bucky growled in frustration and pinched Amy’s nipple. The first time he managed to fool around with both his beautiful people and none of them were prepared.  
  
Amy squirmed at the sensation, which worked her further onto Steve.  
  
Steve moaned at the slick sensation. All thoughts driven out of his head. His hips involuntarily rocking forward. The head slipped in.  
  
Amy’s eyelashes fluttered against her cheeks. She had missed him. Missed this. Steve felt amazing inside her. Touching herself didn’t even compare. She had always preferred sex with a partner to doing everything herself. And Steve had been her favourite. He was more than just and exercise partner. She wanted him to take care of her. To make her feel safe and loved the way he used to. “... Promise you’ll pull out?”  
  
“I can do that.” Steve panted. He’d better be able to because if he pulled out right now, without things going any further, he would probably go crazy.  
  
Bucky licked his lips. This was happening. All his dreams were coming true and this was happening. “Our baby girl is a lady, Stevie. You can’t fuck her on the floor like a savage.” Not the first time anyway. There would be time for that later. “Get your ass into bed.”  
  
“So demanding.” Amy grumbled twisting to the side so she could wrap her arms around his neck and sinking a little further onto him.  
  
Steve tightened his hold on Amy and stood up still holding her. It meant losing her around him for a second, but Bucky was right. Having her in the bed was worth it. “Yeah. But he always seems to have a point.”  
  
Bucky smacked Steve on the ass and threw himself onto the pillows. “Don’t keep her waiting either.”  
  
Steve chuckled and lay Amy on the bed next to Bucky. Arranging her so her head rested on Bucky’s left shoulder the same way it did when they curled up to sleep together. Sweet. Perfect. Exactly the way he had pictured it.  
  
Amy turned her head and kissed Bucky’s chest. She would admit this was nicer than the floor. Especially when Bucky palmed her breast and Steve slid all the way into her.  
  
Steve found a familiar rhythm. Long even strokes. One hand under the small of her back, the other planted beside her head, close enough he could feel the heat coming off Bucky. He loved this woman. She fit him so perfectly. It was different without a condom, with her wetness directly against his sensitive skin. Amy obviously felt the intensity too. Her eyes were closed. Eyelashes dark against her cheeks. He sped up a little once she had a chance to adjust.  
  
Bucky untangled himself from Amy. Holding her was fun. But he was craving something more tactile and involved. He cupped Steve’s jaw and dragged him in for a long kiss. Licking deep into his mouth and biting at his bottom lip, thrilled by the fierceness Steve returned the kiss. Hands on was definitely better.  
  
Amy whimpered. Her hands sliding over Steve’s chest and back arching.  
  
Bucky grinned down at Amy evilly. She was biting her lip to stop from screaming. He wondered who’s name she was stifling. He wondered if she knew. “You like that baby girl? You like watching me kiss Steve while fucks you?”  
  
Amy whimpered again and curled a hand around Bucky’s thigh. She did. She really did. She was so close.  
  
Bucky recognised that expression. He’d never seen it on Amy. But he wanted to see it every day for the rest of his life. More importantly he wanted to see the one that came right after it.  
  
He slipped his hand between them and rubbed a firm circle around her clit.  
  
Amy screamed, digging her nails into Steve’s shoulder and Bucky’s thigh as the first wave of her orgasm hit her.  
  
Steve moaned as Amy tightened around him. Dragging him towards his own climax. “God. Amy. You feel so good when you do that. I’m gonna--“  
  
“Not inside.” Amy gasped. One small spark of reason clinging to life in her mind.  
  
Steve remembered. He wouldn’t break her trust by forgetting. He finished just as he pulled out. Thick pearly strands painting her skin. He stretched out next to her breathing hard.  
  
“Now that’s pretty.” Bucky ducked his head and licked away a strand, catching Amy’s clit at the end of his stripe. “Mmm, baby girl, do you have any idea how good you taste right now?” He took another long lazy lick. This time darting his tongue inside her.  
  
“Bucky.” Amy moaned grabbing a fistful of his hair. How did he know exactly what she needed?  
  
“Awe, sweetheart. Do you want another one?” Steve asked stroking her cheek softly.  
  
Bucky sucked experimentally on the smooth bud of Amy’s clit. That earned him another spectacular noise. Amy was amazingly vocal in bed. He loved it. Bucky looked up at Steve. Based on how huge Steve’s pupils still were he loved it too.  
  
Steve ran a hand over the rippling muscles of Bucky’s back. They were so much more gorgeous together than any fantasy his mind could come up with. “Try two fingers inside her while you suck. She likes that.”  
  
Amy wanted to remind him that he enjoyed some penetration along with his oral too. Bucky wasn’t exactly a slouch when it came to following instructions though. With his cool metal fingers inside her and his mouth on her already sensitive clit, coherent speech was slightly beyond her, let alone sarcasm. Especially once Steve slipped an arm around her and closed his own mouth over one of her nipples.  
  
The hunger in both men’s eyes at the sound of her next climax was almost as delicious as the climax itself.  
  
Steve kissed her gently. Feeling her melt into the mattress as she relaxed. “That’s my girl.”  
  
“Our girl. You gotta share this time Stevie.” Bucky collapsed against the pillows and wrapped an arm around Amy. It was a good start. It had felt even more right than he had imagined. Next time he would push himself a little more. The three of them could do this.  
  
“With you? Always.” Steve said stealing a kiss from Bucky too.  
  
“I'm all sticky.” Amy grumbled nuzzling into Bucky’s side.  
  
“I’ve got you sweetheart. You just stay right there.” Steve kissed Amy’s shoulder. Pressed another quick kiss to Bucky’s smiling lips and hurried to grab a damp cloth to clean her up with.  
  
By the time he got back Bucky was snoring softly, Amy still clamped against his side. Amy looked a little drowsy herself, blinking slowly, her fingers tracing absent patterns on Bucky’s chest.  
  
“What are you thinking, sweetheart?” Steve asked as he carefully wiped every trace off her thighs and stomach.  
  
Amy blushed and looked down almost shyly. “I was greedy tonight. Neither of you even got a second turn.”  
  
He turned her chin up so he could see her eyes. “It’s been a long day for all of us. It might not have been anyone’s peak technical performance. But that was some of the best damn sex I’ve ever had.”  
  
Amy studied his face for a moment. Unsure what to say to that. “Bucky’s swearing is rubbing off on you.”  
  
“Get some sleep sweetheart. Tomorrow is a brand-new day.” Steve chuckled, pulled the blankets over them carefully tucking the soft cotton around Bucky’s shoulders then turning it down so it wouldn’t smoother Amy where she was cradled in his arms. He kissed both of his sleepy beautiful people on the forehead and snuggled himself against them. Slipping his arms around their waists and holding them both close. This was perfect. Or almost perfect. Next time he went out he needed to pick up condoms so he could properly fuck Amy and Bucky could fuck him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Have safe sex folks.


	42. Waking Up In The Real World

Amy woke in the small hours of the morning. The first bubbles of consciousness thought that surfaced were reasuring ones. She felt safe, curled between two big warm bodies. Then the full scope of her predicament hit her. She’d had sex with them. Both of them.  
  
Most of her clothes had ended up near the foot of the bed on Bucky’s side. Her spare robe was there too. That was the way she should go. Once she was out of bed, she could grab the robe and make a break for it. The only difficulty was getting out of bed without waking either of them up. With slow careful movements, she shimmied a little farther up the bed so she wasn’t as tangled in the blankets. It would be fine. She would get out of here, and they could all pretend it had just been a dream.  
  
Bucky woke up with a scared looking Amy climbing over him. A scared Amy running away. “Where do you think you’re going?”  
  
“I was just... Getting up...” The answer sounded hollow even to Amy. They both knew where she was going. Anywhere but here. Anywhere but the place where she had broken her own rule and made her heart vulnerable.  
  
Bucky frowned at her. “It’s the middle of the night.”  
  
“I know, but...” Amy felt all of her muscles lock up in panic. She didn’t belong here. What kind of selfish person got between two people who loved each other as much they did?  
  
“But nothing. Stay.” Bucky patted the bed next to him. He should have known his little Fox would be even more skittish than ever after they finally got her properly into bed.  
  
“Why are you awake?” Amy tucked his hair behind his ear. She’d been careful. She shouldn’t have woken him if he’d been soundly under.  
  
“I have more limbs then I’ve had for months. It is distracting.” Not distracting enough for him to forget her escape attempt.  
  
Steve stretched and blinked on his side of the bed. “What are we talking about?”  
  
_My leaving so you can fall even more deeply in love._ Amy bit back the words before she could say them out loud. “Bucky’s arm.”  
  
Bucky flexed the metal hand above his face. If that was what Amy wanted to talk about, they could talk about it. Especially if it kept her here. “I don’t think I want to wear it all the time.”  
  
Steve rolled over so his head was resting on Bucky’s good shoulder. “You don’t have to. That’s why Shuri made it removable.”  
  
Amy tucked her knees up to her chest. Maybe this wasn’t so bad. She could sit here next to them and be out of their way without having to be alone. “Do you want to take it off now?”  
  
Bucky reached over and pulled her close with the metal arm. There were some benefits to the thing. “Not just yet. Once we get up maybe.”  
  
Amy sighed. She really should leave them to get comfortable with one another. But Bucky was warm, and Steve’s hand had found the spot on the back of her neck that she loved. Naked, exhausted from great sex, curled up with the two most amazing men, it was to much of a fantasy to be believed. Just a couple of hours. Then she would get up and face the real world. She closed her eyes. Bucky's heart beat steady against her cheek. They could still pretend it was all a dream.  
  
*****  
  
Steve woke up before dawn. Bucky was pressed tightly into his side. Amy was half falling out of the bed as far away from them as possible. He reached out as best he could with the arm trapped under Bucky. He couldn’t quite reach her without disturbing Bucky. He ran his fingertips down her spine as best he could. She started away more violently than he had expected her to.  
  
The purple eyes that looked back at him were half panicked instead of sleepy and content. That happened sometimes, she could get jumpy when she was asleep. If they cuddled for a bit, the next time she woke up would be better. He smiled warmly at her. If the next time he woke up it was holding both of them everything would be better. “Get over here.”  
  
Amy shook her head. Morning made things too real. She couldn’t wake up naked in bed with them and pretended everything was fine. “I’m going to get up. I have some work I should do.”  
  
*****  
  
There were birds chirping outside the window. Bucky could hear them as he woke gently from a deep and dreamless sleep. Waking up slowly. It really was the little things he had never considered that made life here so much better than being on his own. Especially the mornings. Not jolting awake, just slowly letting his body change state. His head cradled on Steve’s warm shoulder. Mornings were the best. “Mmm. Morning punk. How are you feeling this morning?”  
  
Steve pressed his nose against Bucky’s temple. There was the face he loved to see in the morning. God, he loved Bucky’s husky morning voice. He used to think it was because it meant they had made it through another night. Now he was pretty sure it had never been his gut that had been reacting. It definitely wouldn’t be from now on. “Fan-fucking-tastic.”  
  
Bucky smirked at that. Now that was a state he could maintain. At least with a little help from their pretty Fox. Their pretty Fox who was oddly quiet through all this. Had they worn her out so much that she was still asleep? He'd worried about her escape attempt last night. But she'd cuddled back up readily enough. And she'd felt languid and relaxed in his arms when she had. He wouldn't blame her at all if she was still asleep. He rolled over with a sarcastic comment forming on his lips. The other side of the bed was empty. His brilliant plan for a repeat of last night was crumbling. “Where’s Amy?”  
  
“She had some work she wanted to do so she got up early. You know how it is with… time zones and stuff…” Steve’s heart plummeted, as good as things were with Bucky, he had no idea what was going on with Amy. Sometimes it seemed like she wanted to be with them. Sometimes he was sure that she wanted to leave and never see or talk to either of them again. He didn’t want to talk about it. He wanted to ignore it and hope it went away…. And that she didn’t. He cleared his throat and tried to change the subject. “I wanted to get a run in, but I didn’t want you to wake up alone.”  
  
Bucky more than liked Amy, but she had no idea how easily she shook Steve’s confidence. Bucky rolled Steve onto his back and kissed him long and hard. “I do prefer waking up next to you. Now get out of here. If you don’t work out how will you keep that ass perky for me.”  
  
Steve fell back against the pillows clutching a hand to his chest in mock distress. “Am I just a piece of meat to you?”  
  
“Nah.” Bucky chuckled and curled his hand around Steve’s neck. Sweet mother of God he loved this man. “You’re my home more than any place ever could be. When I find you, I find myself. I love you Stevie.”  
  
“Love you too Buck.” Steve rested his forehead against Bucky’s. He was right, this was where he belonged. Steve pecked Bucky on the lips and rolled out of the bed before he could start getting too sappy. A day being maudlin in bed wouldn’t help either of them. “I’d better pick up the pace if I’m going to keep my ass cute enough for you.”  
  
He was grinning as he hopped into his workout pants and headed for the door to the suite. It didn’t really matter what happened with Amy. He had Bucky. He could face anything as long as he knew he had Bucky.  
  
“Oh, but when I say it…. It’s a double standard and I won’t stand for it!” Bucky called after Steve departing back laughing. He lay back in the bed. Mornings were the best. Something about waking up safe with Steve next to him stopped his mind from slipping into the dark place at least for a while. This was a particularly perfect morning.  
  
There was only one thing missing.  
  
He detached his metal arm, returning it it the protective case it had come with, and went to find her.  
  
*****  
  
Amy had long since surrendered the suites' desk to Steve and Nat. She much preferred to curl on the couch or sit on the floor with her work spread around her anyway. Today’s project was more a work of fiction than a proper report. Which meant no real cross referencing or checking other people’s reports for confirmation. Just one notebook with the outline sketched in it and her laptop. Without the normal slew of data and intelligence to organise around her, she was firmly on the couch with a cup of tea on the coffee table in front of her.  
  
Steve had padded through shortly before. He had stopped to brush her hair back from her face, but nothing more intimate. Amy wondered if he was already regretting the night before. She should be. It had been a terrible idea. Exactly the sort of thing that would lead to the broken hearts she was supposed to be avoiding. She couldn’t.  
  
A new presence entered the room. Bucky moving slowly and silently. Amy didn’t look up from her typing. He would say something if he wanted to talk. She wouldn’t press it. If he was having a bad day, he was probably just checking the perimeter. She hoped he was having a good day. It would be hard on Steve if the day after their first time was a bad one. He would blame himself, the same way he blamed himself for their earlier fumbles.  
  
Bucky leaned on the back of the couch. Ayame at work made for a pretty picture. Fingers flying over the keyboard. Tantalising strands of hair escaping from her loose bun. It was strange how much it reminded him of last night, and how much he wanted to be kissing her neck again. She should have stayed in bed with them. They could have fooled around again before Steve got up. Maybe Steve wouldn’t have gotten up at all and they could have spent all morning sharing long slow kisses. “What are you working on?”  
  
“Writing up a plan to capture you. The CIA asked for one.” Amy tipped her screen so he could read over her shoulder. A good day then. That was excellent, if not expected news, yesterday had been a lot even without them fooling around.  
  
He leaned even closer, brushing his cheek against hers. She smelled like smoke and flowers again. Clean, delicious, he couldn’t wait to devour her again. “What are you going to tell them?”  
  
She reached back and rubbed a hand over his rough stubble. He had showered, but not shaved this morning. He’d taken his arm off too. In sweatpants and a sleeveless undershirt, it looked like he was settling in for a day relaxing in the suite. “That I’m pretty sure you’re in South America, and that you never would have gotten out if they had used the containment procedure I designed in the first place.”  
  
Bucky twisted a strand of her hair around his finger thoughtfully. “I’m pretty sure I like Columbia.”  
  
Amy smiled. He was joking about his past. He must be having a very good day. That was good, Steve would be relieved. “1964 would agree with you. Don’t worry I’m going to tell them to look at my old paper on Winter Soldier activity in developing nation proxy wars of the 60’s and 70’s. With situation and associated readings, it is over 200,000 words long before you get into checking sources so it should keep them busy for a while… Some of that might be on how guerrilla groups adopted and modified your techniques to make them efficient for non enhanced soldiers, but I can’t for the life of me remember which parts.”  
  
“Is everything you do to protect us?” Bucky kissed the hinge of her jaw and ran his nose down her neck. Sweet little Fox. Invisibly working to keep her boys safe. How could he not adore her for it?  
  
“I also have a day job." Amy smiled and touched their temples together. "Where is Steve? I thought you two would be joined at the hip today.”  
  
“Off on his morning run.” Bucky rolled onto the couch properly. He hadn’t come looking for her to talk about her work. There were other developments that he wanted to keep fresh in her mind. He also wanted to cuddle more. He lifted her computer out of her lap and replaced it with his head. “I had fun last night.”  
  
Amy beamed down at him and started stroking his hair. Sweet touch starved boy. Steve would fix that. “I’m glad. Think you can handle Steve on your own from now on?”  
  
Bucky closed his eyes and tipped he head into her hands. He liked thinking about next time. The three of them in bed together. Kisses and caresses from all sides. “Eye contact and talking helped. We can start with Steve on his back or he can ride me while you hold my head in your lap like this. Fuck, that sounds good. Let’s try that tonight. Then maybe we can work our way up to Steve deep inside you while I’m deep inside him. Ahh baby girl. I have so many ideas for all our next times.”  
  
Amy’s hand stilled. No. No, no, no. There was no tonight. There was no working their way up. There were no next times. There shouldn’t have been a last time. But she was weak. Either of them could bat their eyes and she would melt. The situation could only end in heartbreak. With any luck it would only be her heart. “Bucky... baby... you know last night can’t happen again right?”  
  
“Why the hell not?” Bucky growled sitting up in shock. It had been the best sex of his life. How could she not want to do it again? The three of them together, it was like fireworks.  
  
It wasn’t just the sex. It was sleeping with her and Steve both breathing sweetly in the room. It was knowing that she was there for him. Knowing that Steve wouldn’t wake up sure she was dead. Knowing that she wouldn’t be alone if she had one of those dreams that left her silently gasping and shaking. She belonged with them.  
  
Amy pushed his head back down and resumed her stroking. She didn’t want to upset him, but it wasn’t an easy situation. “You and Steve love each other, you need to figure out how to be together without me. I can’t keep cluttering up your relationship.”  
  
Bucky claimed her free hand in his and pressed it into his chest. Let her feel his heartbeat. It was steady when she was with him. Between that and the way Steve lost the look of the world bearing down on him when she climbed into bed with them, he wanted more of her in their lives not less. “Agree to disagree. You and Steve love each other almost as much as Steve and I love each other, and… you fit with us so well.”  
  
“Steve never told you why we broke up did he?” Amy took a deep breath. Bucky needed the full picture if he was going to understand, and she needed him to understand. Steve was an optimist. He would never give up on her if he thought there was a chance. Her Bucky was a realist. If he knew the facts, he would see how hopeless it all was. How she and Steve couldn’t stop hurting each other. Bucky loved Steve. He would to anything to protect Steve. Protecting Steve meant letting her go and convincing Steve to do the same. She should have told him months ago.  
  
She started at the beginning. Laying everything out from the night someone had broken into her apartment. To Steve not knowing about her being a Fox and breaking up with her the first time. Her ultimately doomed attempt to stay away from him after that. Her disappearing when he said he loved her. North Korea. Their reunion. Her commitment issues and Steve realising he was in love with Bucky. The long-distance relationship. The horrible proposal. Her attempt to make up.  
  
She tried to be gentle. To lay the blame firmly on her side without miss representing the facts. She hadn’t been able to tell Steve she loved him. She still couldn’t, not to his face. Her past had been too big, they hadn’t been able to work around it. She had said no when he proposed. She was the one who left. But she couldn’t shield him entirely. He was the one who had thrown her past in her face. He had rejected her when she tried to reconcile. He had wanted her to be something she couldn’t be.  
  
Amy sighed. She also hadn’t been able to hide how hurt she was by the whole affair. Even retelling it had worn her out. At least she’d managed not to cry. The hand in Bucky’s hair stilled. The story wasn’t enough. He needed to know what she had planned, but not how much she disliked that plan. “So, once you’re doing better, I’m going to go home, and the two of you are going to live happily ever after.”  
  
Bucky blinked up at her. They were both crazy. How was he the emotionally intelligent one in all this? “He still loves you.”  
  
Amy returned to stroking his hair, eyes fixed on the middle distance. Her heart ached. “And I still love him. But that doesn’t change the facts, and there are some things you just don’t come back from. It will be better for everyone if I leave.”  
  
Bucky rolled his face into her stomach and wrapped his arm around her. He wouldn’t believe it. Her being here was part of why he felt safe here. He couldn’t hurt anyone if she was here, she would stop him. He could sleep knowing that she was there to keep the nightmares away from him and from Steve. She made him smile and laugh. She was always there when he needed a shoulder. And he… He needed her. “You can’t leave. Not forever. I need you.”  
  
“I’ll stay until you don’t.” She bit the inside of her cheek to centre herself. No tears. She had known since Mongolia that this was temporary. She should never have let herself get as close as she had. “But I can’t stay forever.”  
  
Sweet cuddly Bucky. With his oddly charming combination of needy eyes and teasing kisses. He was so vulnerable, but he made her feel so inexplicably safe. He reminded her of the stories her aunts told about court romances. The balance of strength and weakness, the trust he placed in her inherent goodness. The idea of him had saved her once. The reality of him was so much more. She was more than half in love with him already. It would be so easy to tip over that edge, to fall in love with him like slipping into a warm bath. But he was already in love with Steve.  
  
And Steve was in love with him. More enduringly than he had ever been in love with her. Steve had burned the world for Bucky. Twice. Once when he thought he had lost him, once when the world tried to take him away again. She had driven him away in less than a year… twice. Even if he did still have feelings for her, she couldn’t compete. She wouldn’t try to compete.  
  
They could be happy together, if she didn’t confuse everything. At this point she could only hope that hers was the only heart that got broken. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have… I should have had better self control.”  
  
Bucky groaned and pressed his face into her harder. Couldn’t she and Steve just kiss and make up? The both wanted to. He needed them both. Wouldn’t life be easier if they made things work? “Why am I attracted to such stubborn people?”  
  
Amy smiled down at him sadly. She knew that frustration. She had felt that way a lot when things were going badly. “I know he can be a bit of an idiot but that’s part of his charm.” She loved Steve for his stubbornness and belief that he was in the right. She hoped that Bucky loved it too.  
  
“You’re impossible.” Bucky grumbled into her shirt.  
  
Amy smoothed his hair. They would be happy. It might hurt a little at first. But they would be.  
  
Nat took in the tableau on the couch. Amy soothing Bucky as he trembled in her lap. “Am I interrupting.”  
  
“No.” Amy said rubbing his neck. “Bucky’s just having a hard morning.”  
  
Nat frowned. She had run into Steve earlier and he had seemed more relaxed than she had seen him in months. There was no way Steve would be whistling and smiling if Bucky had woken up fragile. If her _Otets_ wasn’t feeling great it must have come on since Steve had left the suite. “How hard? Shuri wants to talk through some of the stuff we picked up. But if you’re not up for it I'll tell her to wait.”  
  
“Not that hard.” Bucky sighed and rolled off the couch. The sooner he got his brain in order the better. Amy would never stop planning to leave if she thought they only wanted her here because of what she could do for them. He and Steve were going to have a long conversation about pretty girls with commitment issues and pushing them too far.  
  
*****  
  
Amy knelt at the table in her bedroom. The suite was quiet this afternoon. Amy had taking advantage of the calm to clean up from their mission. Her gear needed attention, especially her swords. Getting the blood off the steel was important is she wanted to maintain the integrity of the blades. It had carried her through the afternoon and we’ll past dinner. Not that she was hiding… And if she was hiding she was justified in hiding. She had already had one hard conversation today. She was allowed to avoid the next one until at least tomorrow.  
  
“Are you coming to bed? Or is that something we aren’t allowed to do anymore too?” Bucky leaned against the doorframe.  
  
Amy sighed and lower her work into her lap. She should have expected him to be irritable after their conversation this morning. He’d had a shiny new toy and she had taken it away. She was in the right here though. He would see that eventually. “I’m not the one being irrational.”  
  
“No. You are being hyper rational. Which is just as bad.” Bucky knelt beside her and rested his head on her shoulder. “Come to bed Ayame. Please.”  
  
“I’ll be there before you fall asleep.” Amy returned to plaiting the silk cord. Under over around under. Minimum time in bed with them. That was the safest plan. She couldn’t cut them off entirely, it wouldn’t help anything if they had to come looking for her in the middle of the night. Come to bed late, get up early. She could nap when Bucky did in the afternoon, that should keep her well rested. It wasn’t the worst plan she’d ever come up with.  
  
Bucky looked like he wanted to say something more. Before he could, Steve slipped through the door. Bucky bit off his statement.  
  
Steve smiled at his people. Kneeling close together they made a cute picture. He lowered himself to the floor with them. “Are we in here tonight?”  
  
Amy kept her eyes on her work. She didn’t like the way he said we. No that wasn’t right. She liked the way he said we too much. His we encompassed her, folding her into the same warm mental space where he kept Bucky. That was wrong. They were too separate entities. Them and her. “My futon isn’t big enough for the two of you. Bucky was just about to come find you.”  
  
Steve kissed her neck. She'd been so nervous this morning, and then she'd just disappeared all day. He had thought she might be regretting their night together. But this little domestic tableau with her and Bucky sitting so close together made him think she was just playing shy. Giving them space I they needed it. He didn't need space. Not from her. And he didn't think Bucky wanted any either. “You missed dinner.”  
  
Amy shifted awkwardly. Her cheeks felt hot. Steve had clearly missed the separate entities memo. She should have taken him aside and had the conversation with him earlier. Awkwardness be damned. “I ate while the two of you were napping. You don’t have to worry about me.”  
  
Steve ran a hand through her hair. This was nice. Leaning against Bucky. Amy blushing prettily for him. Bucky had probably been teasing her about last night to get her to colour so easily. It didn’t really matter. As long as he didn’t have to feel bad about wanting to hold both of them now. And he did worry about Amy. Even if he worried about Bucky more. “Mmm. I have an email from Dai that says otherwise. It’s long. It’s ranty. It threatens me with bodily harm if I let you run yourself into the ground.”  
  
Amy closed her eyes. Yeah that sounded like Dai. She should remind him that she didn’t need a babysitter. He had her best interests at heart, but it was just encouraging Steve. “I’ll tell him to go easy on you. You don’t need to get dragged into my mess.”  
  
Steve curled a strand of her hair around his finger. Sweet girl. It was good to be allowed to touch her again. “I want to be in your mess. You’re in ours. It’s only fair.”  
  
“Don’t worry about me. Really Steve. I'll be fine.” She stayed looking down. She was pretty sure if she looked at him right now, she would start crying.  
  
“Whatever you say sweetheart.” His girl was pretending to be strong again. That was alright. He would be there for her anyway. He kissed her neck again and stood up. “Don’t stay up too late. Coming Buck?”  
  
“I’ll be right there.” Bucky said eyes fixed on the hint on colour in Amy’s cheeks.  
  
“Makin’ me go to bed alone? What am I gonna do with the pair of you?” Steve chuckled pressing a quick kiss into each of their heads.  
  
“A lot of fun things.” Bucky promised kissing Steve one more time.  
  
Steve grinned all the way out the door. It was going to be a good night. He wondered if they would let him sleep in the middle tonight. No, Bucky liked the middle too much. But he could hold Amy’s hand all night at least.  
  
Amy listened to him go, rather than looking. “You shouldn’t lead him on. I’m talking to him in the morning. I’m clearing all this up.”  
  
“Things are pretty clear from where I’m sitting.” Buck said toying with the loose end of her silk cord. The solution was perfectly obvious. He and Amy would keep Steve out of trouble. He and Steve would stop Amy from overthinking everything. Steve and Amy would keep him safe from the world, and the world safe from him. The three of them could be perfectly happy together.  
  
Amy’s grip tightened on the hilt of her sword. She had to stay strong. The options were a little pain now or breaking later. And she couldn’t handle breaking again. “It was a mistake, and it is not going to happen again.”  
  
Bucky cupped her chin and turned her head, so they were face to face. “You could never be a mistake.”  
  
The corner of his mouth twitched. She was such a bad liar. Her eyes had fixed on his lips as soon as he had turned her towards him. Just like they always did. There was no way he wasn’t going to kiss her when she looked at him like that. And he would bet she knew that, at least subconsciously.  
  
He licked his lips to make her eyes flash again. Slowly, very slowly he lowered his lips to hers. Gently working them together, until hers parted and he could slip his tongue in and taste her. “I'll talk to him. Set him straight. Just stay with us.”  
  
Amy sighed and flopped back on the tatami mats. Her fingers had gone slack on the cord. Two hours work undone thanks to one perfect kiss. He tasted like dark chocolate and sea salt, Amy was pretty sure she was slightly addicted to his kisses. Just like she was addicted to Steve’s burnt caramel and smoke. “Steve cheats too when it comes to stealing kisses.”  
  
“Yeah. I taught him well.” Bucky grinned evilly at her. She wanted to be with them. He just had to play the long game. He would wait. And eventually she would initiate. “See you in bed, pretty girl.”


	43. What Amy Needs Right Now

Bucky was washing dishes when Steve got back from his morning run. Scrubbing methodically at a pot wedged in the corner of the sink. Steve slipped into the kitchen. Pressing a soft kiss to Bucky’s shoulder and leaned against the counter opposite the sink. Careful to keep his posture casual and none threatening. The last thing he wanted to do right now was antagonise Bucky. Not with the atmosphere of the suite the way it had been since last night.  
  
“Is it just me, or have things been… tense?” Since they'd had sex. Or at least, since Amy had left in the morning and not talked to him all day. He had hoped that the, frankly amazing, sex had released some pressure and things would be easier between them all now. Instead it felt more like they had pulled the pin on a grenade with nowhere to throw it. He was tired of waiting for the explosion. He wanted to know what had gone wrong and why.  
  
Bucky set down the cloth he’d been using. Closing his eyes, he squeezed the edge of the counter to centre himself. He’d told Amy he would handle Steve. He owed her that much. “Amy’s out. She's staying until we know I’m not going to lose it, but after that she’s taking off. She says she doesn’t want to interfere with our relationship and that… that it was a mistake.”  
  
He turned to face Steve. An icy chill squeezing his chest. “She apologised Steve. Fucking best blowjob of my life and the person who gave it to me apologised for it.”  
  
Steve didn’t know what to say. Amy shouldn’t have felt like she needed to apologise. And Bucky shouldn’t have had to hear her apologise for what had been an amazing night.  
  
Bucky flexed his fingers. He could crush the counter if he wasn’t careful. “Worst part is it isn’t even because of me. I would get it if she didn’t want to deal with my brain shit. Or with us being with fugitives. But no. She doesn’t want us because she thinks _she’ll_ ruin things. You know where she got that idea? You broke up with her… twice.”  
  
“The first time I’ll give you. Hell, I’d do just about anything to protect her and I haven’t known her that long. But the second time…Why the fuck would you ask her to marry you like that?” Bucky shook his head.  
  
Steve shifted defensively. It had felt like the only option at the time. But he could have called afterwards. They could have made up. She hadn’t called him either. “It was complicated.”  
  
“You forced her hand you jerk. You promised she could always make her own decisions. You told her you were in love with someone else. And then you got mad when she tried to protect herself. What were you thinking?”  
  
Steve paced the far side of the kitchen like a caged animal. He knew he’d been stupid and insecure. “I was thinking I wanted to spend the rest of my life waking up with her. I was thinking that I loved her, and I wanted the world to know. I was thinking… I was thinking it was the one thing that would keep her with me after we found you… and that I needed her on my side.”  
  
He'd been thinking about an impossible choice and how to get out of making it. Which he had. Amy had made it for him. And he'd hated it. He still hated it now that it was back on the table. At least conceptually back on the table. It looked like Amy was trying to make it for him again. And he didn't want her to. He didn't want to have to make it at all. But what was the third option? Share? That wasn't fair to either of them. All three of them being an item. Impossible. Bucky and Amy liked each other sure, but they had only just met in the grand scheme of things. Expecting that to grow into something more --ever -- let alone so fast. It wasn't fair to them either.  
  
No. What it came down to was, Amy was right. It had been a mistake. A beautiful, perfect, life altering, mistake. But not on her part. On his. He should have stopped it. He should have protected the people he loved from his own pleasure seeking urges. He hadn't. He'd wanted to feel good and make them feel good. And what had it gotten them in the end? Just more pain.  
  
Bucky stepped into Steve’s path, stopping him in his tracks. Two could play the big and irritated game. “Did you tell her that? Did you tell her any of that sappy romantic shit?”  
  
Steve shrunk in on himself. “No…”  
  
“No.” Bucky jabbed him in the chest with one finger. “Because you’re an idiot who shouldn’t be allowed to talk to girls alone. Little Fox thought you want her because of politics. Because of _what_ she is, not _who_ she is.”  
  
Steve blinked. That was ridiculous. He hadn’t even considered the political effects of marrying Amy. “I didn’t…”  
  
“ _I_ know that, and _you_ know that. Shit Stevie, you hate politics.” Bucky slumped back against the edge of the counter and ran a hand through his hair. “You’d never use someone you care about like that. But little Fox has been a political pawn since the day she was born. And she’s paranoid. Paranoia she earned in blood. She’s gonna jump to conclusions if you don’t lay out the facts for her.”  
  
“Bucky…” Steve took a small step towards his boy. This was hitting Bucky close to home. Bucky was paranoid himself. He had earned his paranoia in blood too.  
  
Bucky sighed and grabbed the front of Steve shirt, pulling him into a vicious kiss. “I love you. But damn my life would have been easier if I could have just fallen for Daisy Killian. I would have been discharged out of the war. Gone home. Raised a gaggle of snot nosed kids, like my parents wanted.”  
  
“You would have been miserable.” Steve breathed into the space between them. “You couldn’t talk to her for more than an hour before your eyes glazed over.”  
  
“Yeah,” Bucky sighed and combed his fingers through Steve’s hair. There had never been anyone for him except Steve, not really. No one else made his heart flutter and his knees go weak like his guy did… except Amy. “But I would have two arms, and you and Peggy for neighbours, so it’s a toss up.”  
  
“I love you Buck.” Steve cupped Bucky’s neck and pulled him close.  
  
Bucky leaned into Steve. Letting him take his physical weight along with the emotional. Steve couldn’t have known how much they would both need their little Fox. And by her own admission Amy had hidden exactly how damaged she was from him. The only thing they could do now was try and pick up the pieces. “Love you back punk. Don't go giving our girl any more reasons to want to leave.”  
  
*****  
  
Amy’s practice was stretching out these days. Two hours turning into three or four. She stuck mostly to sword or naginata with an occasional foray into dagger or empty hands. Steve would stop in the doorway and watch her sometimes. It always looked like he wanted to say something. But he never did. If Amy stopped and looked at him properly, he would smile and slip away. She could feel his eyes on her now. If there was any day he was going to break his silence, it was today. She finished her pattern before she turned towards him.  
  
Steve stepped into the dojo. “I talked to Bucky.”  
  
Amy Dropped her eyes and started unwrapping her wrists. “Well if you talked to Bucky then we don’t really need to have this conversation, do we?”  
  
Steve sat down on the low bench next to Amy's gear bag. “I think we do.”  
  
Amy shoved her wraps into the bag. She had been hoping to avoid this. She should have known it was a vain hope. “You’re going to ask me to set aside my judgement and give you another chance.”  
  
“No." Steve rubbed the back of his neck with a sigh. He wanted another chance. Even if he didn't deserve one. But that wasn't what they needed to talk about right now.  
  
"I’m going to ask something you don’t want me to ask but I should have asked months ago.” Steve looked up at her intently. He was supposed to look after the people he loved and he’d been failing Amy at every turn. She wasn’t as strong as she pretended to be. She had let him behind the curtain enough times to know that. Just because he was back on the outside didn’t change how fragile she was on the inside. “Amy, when was the last time you called your therapist?”  
  
Amy bit her lip. He was right. She didn’t want him to ask. “I can’t call him. We don’t know if he’ll feel ethically obligated to turn you in.”  
  
“You need to talk to him, Ayame. It is worth the risk.” Steve leaned forward on his knees, still looking up at her. “Your being alright, is worth the risk.”  
  
He stayed like that. Watching her reaction. It was quiet, intimate. It reminded him of before, back when things were good.  
  
Amy dropped her eyes. He was right. It had been too long since she had talked to her therapist. She didn’t even have to bring up the boys. There was enough going on that would fill the time. Enough that she really should talk about. “I’ll call.”  
  
“Good. You have to look after yourself, sweetheart.” He wanted to pull her into his lap. Kiss her softly until she fully understood how valuable she was as a person. He managed to refrain himself. Keeping his hands folded between his knees. “It doesn’t matter if that means staying or going. Bucky and I can figure something out. You have to do what’s right for you, Aims. I love you. I want you to be happy. Whatever that means. Even if I’m not a part of that happiness. I’m here if you need me though. Always.”  
  
“Thank you...” Amy whispered smoothing the wrinkles out of the shoulder of Steve’s shirt. “For understanding.”  
  
Steve curled his fingers around hers. “We’re alright?”  
  
Amy squeezed his hand, before she slipped hers free. “We’re as good as we can be.”  
  
Steve closed his empty hand. A heavy sense of loss settling over him. This was it then. As good as things could be. He pushed aside the urge to kiss her one more time and started for the door.  
  
“Steve?” Amy called just as he reached the door.  
  
Steve turned back to her. “Yeah?”  
  
Amy felt more cracks forming in her heart. It was hard. Missing someone who was still in the same room. She had survived worse. But nothing hurt quite like this did. “Look after him. And make sure he looks after you. You've both earned a happy ending.”  
  
Steve leaned his forehead against the doorframe. They had. Especially Bucky. He deserved to spend the rest of his life happy and surrounded by the people he cared about. So did she. “Would we have worked? If I hadn’t messed everything up. Did we have a chance?”  
  
“You weren’t the only one who messed things up, Steve.” They should have talked. She should have made them talk. Maybe they wouldn’t have been able to work things out, but at least the what if of it all would hurt less now.  
  
“Maybe.” Steve shrugged. “Would we have?”  
  
Amy shook her head. She wanted to say yes. She wanted to tell him that they could have lived happily ever after with 2.5 children and a white picket fence. All the evidence was against that outcome. “I don’t know. All I know is you can’t change the past. Even water under a bridge changes where it has been.”  
  
A sad smile twisted Steve’s mouth. That sounded like his girl. He called him a man out of time. But she was the one born in the wrong millennia. She would have thrived as the power behind the throne in an ancient court. Instead she had exiled herself from her entire world for them. And asked for nothing in return. “Old Japanese proverb?”  
  
Amy smiled back just as sadly. “Thing I said just now.”  
  
Steve took two steps towards her and kissed the top of her head. She was brilliant. She was kinder than she thought. She gave so much of herself to the people she cared about. He loved her. And today that meant letting her go. “I’m going to make stir-fry for dinner tonight. I'll see you in a couple hours.”


	44. Nightmares?

Amy was hanging upside down. Chains holding her arms tight against her sides. Brick scraped her back. She tried to take a deep steadying breath but the bindings around her chest were too tight. The wall she was attached to was illuminated from above, the light somewhere just out of her field of vision at this angle. The rest of the room was dark. Too dark for her to see how large the room was. Someone was breathing in that darkness. Familiar breathing that set Amy’s teeth on edge.  
  
“Have you missed me little bird?” Jun’ichi stepped into her field of view. Not the scared Jun’ichi from the last time she had seen him. The beautiful Jun’ichi from when she had thought he loved her. Her breath caught. This was impossible. He was dead. She had killed him. Even before that he hadn’t looked like this. He had been scared. There was something off about his restored face. It was too perfect. His grin was too wide. His movements too jerky.  
  
Amy couldn’t get her lungs to work. Couldn’t stop her heart from beating too fast. Couldn't stop the panic building in her chest. He stepped towards her menacingly. She braced for a slap.  
  
A leather gloved hand closed around the back of Jun’ichi’s neck. He gasped and writhed as it tightened. There was a sickening crunching noise as his spine snapped. The body slumped to the ground, shoved forward by that hand.  
  
The Winter Soldier stepped over the body. He grabbed the chain around her shoulders with his gloved hand. Amy’s stomach flipped at his predatory grace. His metal arm flashed as he snapped the chains holding her. She twisted in the air, so she landed on her knees.  
  
Her rescuer knelt in front of her. He removed the mask covering his lower face. Eyes bright with mischief. Not the eyes of a mindless killer. Bucky’s eyes. “Hey baby girl. You need a hand?”  
  
“Well, since you’re here.” Amy let him slip one arm under hers and take some of her weight. Her legs didn’t seem entirely firm. Her mind was spinning. She wanted to blame the blood rushing back to her limbs. But that wasn’t it. It was him. James Buchanan Barnes. Bucky. Bucky. Bucky. He was here. Why was he here? How had he found her?  
  
He pulled her in against him. “I’m always here for you.”  
  
The kiss caught Amy off guard. It was hard and hot and completely different from kissing Steve. Different even from the few kisses Bucky had stolen before. There was nothing tentative or questioning about his lips or the way he crushed her into his chest. The closest thing to it was that first kiss the night they had spent together, but... More. He wasn’t careful with her. Didn’t hold back his strength.  
  
“No one threatens my baby girl.” Bucky growled running his hands down her sides. Amy growled back leaning into the kiss. She didn’t need protection. Right now, all she needed was him. He had her legs around his waist. His metal arm holding her up, his other hand cupping the back of her head, keeping her mouth against his.  
  
Their clothes had disappeared sometime during the kissing. Melting away into the same nothing as the room outside the spotlight. The same darkens that had claimed the chains and Jun’ichi. They were alone. Just the two of them, nothing between their skin but heat.  
  
Now he had her up against the wall one of his hands pinning one of hers above her head, fingers tangled together, metal and flesh. The other hand keeping her leg raised as he thrust into her hard. His fingers digging into her thigh hard enough to bruise. Bucky bit at her neck and shoulders. Amy dug the nails of her free hand into the flesh of shoulder, he didn’t seem to mind or even notice, even though she was sure she would draw blood soon. She was close. Electricity crackled over her skin.  
  
The world dissolved into sparkling lights. The silver white of light on Bucky’s old arm. The deep navy of Steve’s Captain America Suite. The blue grey slate of Bucky’s eyes. The Sky blue of Steve’s eyes. The bright amethyst of her own powers as they danced over and into Bucky’s skin. The gold of dawn sun light through their bedroom window.  
  
*****  
  
Amy woke in a sweat. She was shaking all over. This was not good. Bad enough that she was having nightmares about Jun’ichi again. Now Bucky was coming to her rescue in her subconscious. She was supposed to be forgetting she was attracted to either of them. Having sex dreams about Bucky was the opposite of that.  
  
She sat up, setting her head between her knees and taking deep breaths. She had to get herself back under control.  
  
A hand touched her shoulder, making her jump. Despite her involuntary reaction, the touch was gentle. The strength in the fingers carefully controlled. Exactly the same kind of touch from her dream. It made her anxious, even as it soothed her.  
  
“You alright, baby girl?” Bucky whispered to avoid waking Steve. She didn't look alright. Pale and shaky. He worried about her. She had been avoiding both of them for days. Even after he had made sure Steve wouldn't bother her about their future. Disappearing if she was alone in the room with either of them. Coming to bed late. Waking up early. She was burning the candle at both ends and eventually it would catch up with her.  
  
Amy shook her head to clear it. “Just a dream. I’ll be fine.”  
  
“Come here.” Bucky ran his hand up and down her arm, her skin was cool to the touch. She was definitely burning herself out. She gave them too much of herself to them, to him, he could give more of himself back. He could take care of her in return. “You protect me from nightmares, I can return the favour.”  
  
“It won’t work.” Amy sighed and shifted her head onto his chest. Nothing stopped the nightmares, not really. And while this had been a very strange version, it had still been her mind rebelling. For all that, she didn’t want to leave right now. Even if she wasn’t going to relax enough to go back to sleep, she felt safe with her boys. Bucky petting her hair soothingly. Steve breathing rhythmically, arms spread wide across the pillows. How he found that position comfortable she would never know. It did make it easy for Bucky to use him as a pillow, maybe that was enough. The fingers of the hand closest to her found their way into the ends of her hair. She would stay for a little while at least. Let herself calm down a little before she got up.  
  
“We’ll see.” Bucky kissed the top of her head. She was very stubborn, but she belonged here as much as he did. He would never have made it through all this with out her. He wasn’t willing to let her go anymore than he would let Steve or Natasha go. If he could, he would protect her from the horrors inside her mind as well as those outside.  
  
*****  
  
It did work. Amy slept soundly until dawn. She woke up gently, cradled against Bucky’s side. “Oh, I hate you.” She grumbled a comfortable fog still clouding her mind.  
  
Bucky chuckled deep in his chest and rolled her over him, so she was nestled between him and Steve. He always felt best first thing in the morning. Even better when he woke up with Amy and Steve with him. They grounded him. There was nothing unpleasant that even vaguely resembled waking up with the two of them. “Big talk for a sleepy girl.”  
  
“ _Est-ce le matin?_ ” Steve muttered rolling over and draping his arm over both of them.  
  
“ _Trop tôt. Va dormir, Mon Ours._ ” Amy whispered, kissing the bicep that was suddenly pressed against her face. It was instinct. A left over reaction from their time together. Steve was sleepy, he didn't have to get up.  
  
Bucky laughed out loud in shock. “What did you just call him? My bear? That’s adorable.” Adorable and perfect. Steve the big snugly bear. He couldn’t have picked a better pet name himself. He felt a flash of deep affection for her. They had been in real love before everything had torn them apart. Bucky could at least try and get them to talk about it again. Once they'd had a little more time to sit with the idea. Then Amy could stop running away and Steve could stop worrying. And _he_ could wake up like this every morning.  
  
Amy shoved his shoulder. It was another slip. She shouldn’t let herself be this comfortable around them, she made mistakes. She needed to be more careful. Just because she was curled in bed with him, didn’t mean she could fall back into the casual affection from before. She needed to find something to stop herself being complacent around them. “Shush. You’ll wake him up for real.”  
  
“He is awake already, and yeah, she calls me her bear. Don’t tease her.” Steve nuzzled closer, getting a face full of Amy’s hair in the process. He could have slept longer, but he didn’t want to miss out on a chance to cuddle both of them. If Amy was awake and talking maybe she would stay for a little while. Maybe they could even do more than talk. They hadn’t talked about it since she’d started talking to her therapist again. Who knew what he recommended.  
  
“I wasn’t going to tease her.” Bucky rolled Amy on top of him. Tucking her knees against his sides. “It’s cute that the little Fox gave you a pet name.”  
  
She sat back looking down at him, this was ridiculous. She couldn’t stay here. Not with both of them awake. Not straddling his hips like this. Not after that dream. It would only complicate things. But his hand felt good on her hip and flirting always seemed to make him feel more like himself. That was why he used it as a coping mechanism. Nat was his daughter. And Steve responded like a spaniel puppy, all big eyes and eagerness to please. She challenged him. That was the only reason she ended up as a target so often. Even if his flirting did give her butterflies. That was her problem, not his.  
  
“What’s mine?” Bucky reached up and brushed her hair back. He liked this. Steve pressed against his side. Amy on top of him. There were more pants than were ideal, but it didn’t due to rush these things.  
  
“Your what?” Amy asked distracted. His hand was stroking her side under her shirt now.  
  
“My pet name. If you gave me one, what would it be?” He let a feral grin creep onto his face. She liked that. He could tell. Liked when he was a little bit dangerous. She was a little bit dangerous herself. And she wasn’t scared of that part of him.  
  
“ _Mon Loup_.” The words came almost automatically, spilling out of a number of recent dreams. Amy almost bit her traitorous tongue off. Giving him a pet name was a terrible idea. It was too much encouragement. Not just casual flirting. Pet names were personal. Intimate. You didn’t just give them to people you were only casual with. Even if it did fit him nicely.  
  
“You’re a fox. Steve’s a bear. And I’m a wolf.” Bucky rolled them over, so Amy was trapped under him. Throwing her around like this was fun. It only worked because she let him. If she wanted him there, he'd have landed on his back on the floor the first time he'd wrapped his arm around her. He was tempted to dip his head and bite that soft neck. Nip and suck at it until he left a hicky. Leave her marked as his. “Does that make me the apex predator?”  
  
“It makes you trouble.” Amy kissed the tip of his nose.  
  
There was only one option that would get her out of here with her sanity intact. Leaving before this went any farther. She arched her back and slipped out from under him in a fluid motion. Keeping her strides regular and confident as she left the room. _Left_ not fled. She wasn't running away... She wasn't.  
  
“You know, I think she likes me.” Bucky grinned after her. He liked her calm competent handling of them, but this was better. She was more fun when she was off balance. The perfect illusion was pretty, but he liked these glimpses behind the veil.  
  
Steve rolled lazily onto his stomach, bumping his shoulder against Bucky. “You scared her.”  
  
“She’ll be back. She doesn’t like to lose.” Bucky leaned back and tucked his hand behind his head. It was times like this that he almost wished that he did have two arms. His old bad boy mannerisms lost something with only one. Teasing Amy. Steve shirtless next to him. He could almost pretend he was okay.  
  
“I like it, for the record.” Steve kissed Bucky good shoulder tenderly. That smirk had always made his stomach flip. Now that he recognised it as love and was allowed to be in love, he didn’t feel the need to resist its pull. “ _Mon Loup_. It suits you.”  
  
“She’s good at what she does, _Mon Ours_. What do you call her? _Mon Renarde_ or _Kitsune-chan_?” Bucky grinned at those warm blue eyes. He felt so much like his old self this morning. No. Not like his old self. His heart was open and unshielded. He could be as in love as he wanted to be. Which was almost easy, except for the _Ayame_ of it all.  
  
Steve twisted his head to look at the door. He could almost see Amy standing there. A phantom of his girl, smiling at both of them, mischief sparkling in her eyes. She wasn't though. She had left like they had burned her. Like she should, because she deserved a relationship that didn't come with all their complications. As much as he wanted to keep her close. “I call her sweetheart.”  
  
“Sweetheart…” Bucky rolled the name around his mouth. Tasting it like a candy. Like he wanted to taste her again. “No, she’s more spice than sugar. I’ll stick with baby girl for now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *What time is it?  
> *Too early. Go back to sleep, my bear.  
> *My wolf.


	45. Mixed Messages

Steve groaned and stretched as he let himself back into the suite. Working out with T’Challa was different from all the training he had done since the serum. It was nice, sparing with someone who was as fast and as strong as he was. T’Challa’s sense of humour was great too. It really was a shame that Sam had moved to London. They would have gotten along like a house on fire once they got past the circumstances of their initial meeting.  
  
Amy’s head snapped up from her computer. Steve. Exactly the person she wanted to see. “Are you going to be around for a few days? I want to go home to Japan, but I won’t if it will leave Bucky alone.”  
  
“I definitely can be. Is there a reason or just homesick?” A hundred reasons Amy might want to leave raced through his head. Everything from needing to lead her team personally, to an arranged marriage. The best scenario his mind could come up with was Fredrick launching a new line and Amy wanting to be there to support Dai.  
  
Amy couldn’t have stopped her smile if she wanted to. “It's Hideo, Kiki's baby. His’s _Omiyamairi_ is this weekend.”  
  
“Congratulations.” Steve smiled. That was fantastic news. She had mentioned something about Kiki having her baby, but they had been in the middle of planning their heist and the information hadn't really stuck. He was tempted to pick her up and spin her around. Laugh with her the way they used to when something good happened. Amy didn’t laugh enough these days. When she did it was usually followed by a dark shadow behind her eyes, like she didn’t want to enjoy herself.  
  
Maybe a few days away would help. She could spend some time with Dai. That was sure to cheer here up. And while he didn’t want to think about it, she had only promised not to sleep with anyone while she was _here_. That might help too, if she decided to go with that option.  
  
He _really_ didn’t want to think about it. And now it was all he could think about. His Amy and some Marine from Iwakuni. Someone else running their hands over her skin, making her sigh with pleasure. Bucky would be devastated if she slept with someone else. Hell, Steve was a little devastated just by the idea. Which he knew was unfair, but it was still true.  
  
And she was completely unaffected by his turmoil. Amy had met his smile and then gone right back to what she had been reading on her computer. He had always loved watching her work. She always looked so serine, surrounded by papers with a pen tucked behind her ear. She had fewer paper strewn around her today. Just a notebook filled with kanji and a single file.  
  
He took another look at the file. It was labelled with this week’s dates. It wasn’t Amy’s writing though, it was Nat's. “What is this?”  
  
“Nat is keeping an eye on Avengers chatter. That is what they are working on this weekend.” Amy said without looking up. There were things she needed to get done if she was going to go away tomorrow, and she wanted to go away tomorrow. Her family was important to her and she had been neglecting her filial duty to look after the boys. Her nephew, the future Emperor was going to meet the gods and she wanted to be there when he did…. And she had an errand she wanted to run on her way back.  
  
Steve settled on the couch with the file, letting his arm trail along the back, incidentally, letting his fingers brush the back of Amy’s neck.  
  
She kept her eyes down, but leaned back ever so slightly so he was cupping her neck, his thumb stroking absently over her spine. She shouldn’t, but it felt so good. It didn't help that she knew exactly what Bucky would do if he came in now. He would throw himself into their laps and demand attention and kisses from both of them. And she knew what she would do. She would laugh and kiss his cheek, which would make him growl and straddle her lap. Then Steve would cup the back of Bucky’s head and ease him into his lap, murmuring chastisements for ‘bothering the pretty girl' between kisses. Then Steve would look at her through his lashes with Bucky’s head tucked against his neck, he would lick his lips just a little and say something silly like 'unless you want to be bothered?’, and Amy would have to take a few deep breaths to stop herself tackling them both.  
  
A warm spot bloomed in Steve’s stomach. How was he going to get any reading done? He was going to be completely distracted by the feeling of being allowed to touch Amy casually. And there was no doubt in his mind that she was the one in control here, but then, that had always been true. If you loved Ayame, you accepted that. Any relationship would be on her terms. He smiled to himself and flipped the file open with his free hand.  
  
A few pages into the file and Amy’s skin wasn’t enough of a distraction.  
  
Who on earth had thought that genetically modifying rabbits to be the size of horses was a good idea? And why had they made them carnivorous? Based on the satellite photos, there were at least two dozen of the things. At least they seemed to be contained in the Arizona dessert for now. “I have to go. Tony is going to need backup.”  
  
Amy set aside her computer so she could look at him without any barriers between them. “At this point I feel the need to remind you that you once told me we couldn’t be together because you didn’t want to put a helpless civilian in danger. I’m not bringing it up to be cruel I just want to make sure you have proper context for my next statement.”  
  
Amy tented her fingers in front of her face and took a long slow breath. “Steve, that is the single stupidest thing you have ever said.”  
  
*****  
  
Everything was a little fuzzy tonight. Lights a little bright, edges not quite lining up. It wasn’t so bad that Bucky couldn’t follow the sound of Amy yelling. He found her and Steve facing off across the living room. “What now?”  
  
Amy set her jaw. They were absolutely not going to worry Bucky with the details of Steve’s stupid not a plan. Bucky didn’t need to have a panic attack because Steve felt guilty. “You’re in love with a reckless idiot who apparently has a death wish.”  
  
“I wouldn’t die.” Steve said defensively.  
  
Amy rounded on him again. “Oh? Have they changed the sentence for high treason? What is it now? A time out and a stern talking to?”  
  
“Okay. Okay. You’ve made your point.” Steve there his hands up in surrender. As much as he hated to admit it, she was probably right. He had given Tony the phone, he would call if he needed help. And between Tony, Rhody, and Vision there were very few terrestrial threats that could do any real damage.  
  
He didn’t want to fight with Amy. Especially right before she went away for a week. “Look it’s getting late and you have to be up early. Why don’t Bucky and I go read for a bit, while you pack.”  
  
“Pack?” Bucky asked confused.  
  
Amy let herself relax. Steve was offering her an olive branch. It would be churlish of her not to accept it. She would rather talk about her trip than his idiocy anyway. “Kiki's little prince is ready to be presented to the gods. I’m going home in the morning so I can be there for him and his mother.”  
  
“How long?” Bucky asked slipping his hand into hers. Let it not be long. How were he and Steve supposed to win their girl over if she wasn’t here? They needed her here. He needed her here.  
  
Amy combed her fingers through his hair. He looked so lost. That wouldn’t do at all. “A week if everything goes smoothly. Less if you call and tell me it is an emergency.”  
  
Bucky nodded thoughtfully and hugged her close for a few seconds. He didn’t like when she went away. He didn’t like when any of them went away. But they had to be allowed to live their lives.  
  
*****  
  
“Want me to walk you out?” Steve leaned heavily against the door to Amy's room, watching her tuck a few last-minute additions into her bag. Watching her get ready to leave was familiar, even this early in the day.  
  
“I'm a big girl. I can make it a couple hundred yards.” Amy said, shoving a sheathed dagger into her all black Birkin bag next to a flat velvet box with her favorite pearls.  
  
“I know,” Steve shrugged. She could more than take care of herself. He still wanted to be sure. Maybe even steal a goodbye kiss. Something so that even if she did go find that faceless Marine, she would be thinking about him. “But if you want some company, I’m around.”  
  
“You’re still worried out of your mind about the rabbit thing, aren’t you?”  
  
“No.” Steve tried to maintain his cool in the face of her delicately raised an eyebrow. He lasted for all of five seconds before crumbling. “I mean, okay, yes, but that’s not why I’m offering.”  
  
“And why are you offering?” Amy snorted.  
  
Steve shrugged, tucking his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants. Maybe the kiss was a bad idea. “Just want to say a proper goodbye. Make sure you get off all right.”  
  
Amy flicked her eyes up at him. “You never walk Nat out when she goes away for the weekend.”  
  
“You might be more important to me than Nat. No offense to her,” Steve pushed out of the door and took a few steps into the room. Bad idea or not, he still wanted his kiss. “Let me say goodbye. Like we used to.”  
  
“I have a rule about seeing people that are already in a relationship for a reason.” Amy steeled herself. Steve had always made her want to break all her rules, and sweet flirty Bucky with his wolf pup eyes didn’t exactly help her self-control.  
  
“You and me predate me an him.” Steve knew she had a point. But if it was that simple, he wouldn’t spend every evening worrying that this would be the night she didn’t come to bed.  
  
“Maybe on your end, but not on his.” Amy shook her head. Bucky had loved Steve for close to 100 year. And Steve had loved him back, even if he hadn’t realized it. All she had done was shown up later and been allowed to bask in his affection for a while. “Just... Stop being in love with me.”  
  
Steve took another step towards her, trapping her between him and the wall. “I have tried, Amy. I tried for months. I tried after I let you go the first time. I tried after you died. I tried after that stupid fight that we never should have had. I have tried to stop loving you over and over and it hasn’t worked at all.”  
  
“Steve.” Amy set her hand in the middle of his chest and dropped her eyes. She didn’t push him away, but she also didn’t let him get any closer.  
  
Steve didn’t need to get closer. He had her where he wanted her. He braced a hand on either side of her head, and waited for her to look back up at her. “I’m not asking for anything. I’m not suggesting you put aside any of your issues with the arrangement. But I do still love you. And nothing is going to change that. Not my relationship with Bucky. Not you call me an idiot every chance you get—”  
  
“If you stopped acting like an idiot, I’d have fewer chances.” Amy was impressed by how coolly sarcastic she managed to keep her voice. Certainly, keeping her heartrate slow was proving difficult with him towering over him. She really should feel confined, trapped. Not safe and wanted.  
  
Steve couldn’t help the smile that curled his lips. “Not a thousand smart aleck comments. Nothing is going to stop me quietly loving you.”  
  
Amy leaned back against the wall. It would be easy to kiss him right now. Just tip her head to the side and close the few inches between their lips. Easy, but for all his beautiful words it was a terrible idea. “You really are quite the orator when you’re worried.”  
  
Steve took the out. He’d said he wasn’t asking for anything. And she wasn’t giving him anything, other than a way out with his pride intact. He shoved away from the wall. “They are fucking big carnivorous rabbits.”  
  
Amy cupped his face deliberately. Things might be complicated, but they would get through it. Side by side, if not together. “Go blow off some steam. Tony and the others will be just fine. I'll text you when I land.” Steve squeezed her wrist gently. They would be alright. He would miss her like crazy. He would worry himself half to death over Tony. But they would all be alright in the end.  
  
Her hands disappeared from his face, she tossed her heavy gear bag over one shoulder, hung her Birkin bag from the elbow of the other, and she was gone. Not even the sound of footsteps in the hall to mark her leaving.  
  
Steve flexed his fingers. It was going to be a long week.  
  
*****  
  
Amy was right. Steve knew that. Tony didn’t need him checking up. The other Avengers could handle some rabbits. Hell, Tony was probably still mad enough that he would shoot first and ask questions later. That wasn’t going to stop him from worrying.  
  
Or from trying to distract himself from worrying. Thank God Amy had made sure he had more punching bags. He was definitely going to break this one today and with Amy away he was probably going to go through a few more this week.  
  
Bucky padded into the dojo, a piece of toast in hand. The suite was too quiet today. Nat had been in the kitchen and had made him breakfast, but she had been engrossed in transcribing something off her phone and obviously hadn’t wanted to talk. Steve was here, even if he did look stressed. But someone was still missing. “Where's Amy?”  
  
“She’s probably on her flight by now.” Steve said without pausing. Tony wasn’t going to get himself killed. He wasn’t.  
  
He flicked a look over his shoulder, Bucky seemed confused that Amy was already gone. They had talked about it last night, but then he’d been a little hazy last night. Maybe they should have woken Bucky up so she could say goodbye properly. Neither of them had really wanted to though. He'd had a rough night and a week without Amy around to sooth his nightmares probably meant the sleep he had gotten this morning would be the best he got for a while.  
  
Bucky blinked. Flight. Amy was getting on a flight. Had she told him where she was going?  
  
Fragments of memories from last night flashed in front of him. Amy and Steve yelling at one another. Steve throwing up his hands in frustration. Amy telling Bucky he was in love with an idiot. Steve reading to him in bed. Amy coming to bed much later.  
  
And one from this morning. Amy kissing his cheek while he was half asleep. ‘goodbye Bucky baby, look after yourself.’  
  
Now Amy was getting on a flight and Steve was working out the way he did when he was trying to ignore something that was bothering him… pieces clicked into place.  
  
“No. Nonononono.” Bucky dropped his toast and bolted from the embassy.  
  
******  
  
Bucky skidded to a stop on the landing pad. He was breathing hard, he had hit his side on a corner trying to get out here before she could disappear, he wasn’t used to running without his left arm, his balance was all wrong. None of that mattered. He had made it in time. Amy was still waiting for her jet to finish fuelling. “You can’t leave.”  
  
Amy turned to see what the fuss was. “Bucky?”  
  
Steve jogged onto the landing pad. He had been worried when Bucky had taken of running like that. At least until he had figured out where he was going. They should have known Bucky would need to say goodbye more than he needed to sleep.  
  
Bucky stumbled to his knees and grabbed Amy’s hand. “You can’t leave. I know he’s an idiot and he pisses you off pretty much everyday….”  
  
Steve started to reach for Bucky. It wasn’t just about not getting to say goodbye then. Bucky was worried about something bigger. “Bucky, she's not--“  
  
Amy waved Steve down. She was a little curious about where this was going. And more than a little amused by someone else calling Steve an idiot. “Let the man finish Steve. He's clearly trying to get something off his chest.”  
  
Steve rolled his eyes. Sometimes Amy’s playfulness was just frustrating. “Yeah, because he thinks you’re abandoning us.”  
  
“Stop acting like everything is fine.” Bucky snapped at Steve. Didn’t he see? Was he so irritated with her that he was willing to risk everything? “We can’t lose Amy. We need her.”  
  
That got Amy’s attention. “Loose me? Baby why do you think you’re losing me?”  
  
“You and Steve had a fight and now you’re leaving, what else am I supposed to think?” Bucky growled. Now she was doing to too. Did neither of them realise what was happening? How serious this was?  
  
Steve frowned. They had talked about why Amy was leaving and when she would be Back. If Bucky was acting like he had no idea what was going on, he probably didn’t remember what was going on. Which meant he didn’t remember the conversation. “How much time did you lose last night, Buck?”  
  
Bucky bristled. They were trying to distract him. He didn’t want to be distracted. He wanted his nice cosy life with the people he cared about to stay intact. He didn't want to lose Amy because of some silly fight over... He couldn't actually remember what the fight had been over. But it couldn't be more important than Amy. “I don’t know. A couple of hours. This isn’t about me.”  
  
“Yes, it is. I didn’t realise you were having such a bad day.” Amy bit her lip. Could she really abandon them if it was upsetting Bucky this much? “Maybe I shouldn’t go.”  
  
“She’s your best friend. You have to go.” Steve said firmly. It wasn’t fair of him and Bucky to keep her captive, she deserved a life of her own. One that wasn’t complicated the way whatever they had was. He wasn’t going to hold on too tight this time.  
  
“Steve!” Bucky shouted. He had to stop encouraging her to leave. No one would be happy if they let go of one another. The three of them belonged together.  
  
Steve wrapped an arm around Bucky and pulled him into a soothing hug. “It’s okay Buck. She’s not going away forever.”  
  
Amy slipped her arms around Bucky’s waist and pressed herself into his back. Steve’s other arm came around wrapping her neatly into the embrace. “Kiki had her baby, almost a month ago now. I’m going back to meet my little prince and make sure everyone okay. I'll be back in a week. I should have left you a note or something.”  
  
Bucky squirmed around so his back was against Steve’s chest and he could look down at Amy. “You’re not leaving?”  
  
Amy stroked the side of his face her poor sweet boy. Worrying because they hadn’t done their jobs and made sure he understood what was happening. “Not forever.”  
  
Bucky frowned. Was he remembering wrong? Or just missing pieces? “But you and Steve did have a fight?”  
  
The corner of Amy’s mouth twitched. When we’re she and Steve not fighting at least a little these days? “Your idiot wanted to do something stupid and reckless. I talked him out of it.”  
  
“Loudly. And I still think…” The force of Amy’s glare killed the words in his throat. “I think Buck and I will start _Girl with the Dragon Tattoo_ tonight. That should keep us busy for a few days.”  
  
“Good answer.” Amy smirked. Maybe her idiot could learn.  
  
Bucky cupped her chin and turned her back towards him. He was grateful that Steve still had his arms around both of them, otherwise she would probably have pulled away by now. “Promise you’re coming back.”  
  
A flurry of thoughts rushed through Amy’s head. How to reassure Bucky. It had to be something he wouldn’t be able to forget. Something he could check anytime he needed to. “Give me your hand.”  
  
A quick twist of one of his kimoyo beads and a hologram shimmered to life projecting a mirror image of herself back at her from his wrist. She fixed her most soothing smile on her face and started recording. “I’m going home to help present my nephew to the gods and our people. I'll be back in a couple of days. Don’t worry Bucky baby, you can’t get rid of me that easily. Take care of your boy. He’s probably going stir crazy.”  
  
Another twist turned the recording off. The bead stayed pulsing gently with the waiting message. Amy squeezed his hand reassuringly before she let it go. That would have to do.  
  
Bucky looked at the soft glow on his wrist. She was coming back. Amy had promised not to lie to him. A video of her saying she would be back was proof that she would be.  
  
He grabbed the back of her head and kissed her hard. When she pressed gently on his chest to make him let go, he only redoubled his efforts, nipping lips and tracing her mouth with his tongue until she melted into him. Only when he was certain she was completely breathless did he break off the kiss to nuzzle her neck. “Promise.”  
  
Amy had to swallow before she could speak again. It had been a very good kiss. “I promise I will come back to you as soon as I can.”  
  
Bucky flicked his eyes up to Steve still holding him from behind. Not just to him. “To us both.”  
  
Amy pressed her forehead to Bucky’s. “I promise I will come back to you both as soon as I can.”  
  
“Better.” He growled sliding his nose against hers.  
  
Bucky kissed her again. Quick fluttery pecks this time. Then he looked expectantly at Steve.  
  
Steve knew what he wanted. Gently he bent his head until his lips found Amy's. He went with a long slow kiss. One with all the love he felt for her in it.  
  
Amy found herself breathless and panting half off her feet with an arm around both boys’ necks. That was an interesting goodbye. She wasn’t sure how she felt about it. “Okay but I do have to go, or I'll miss everything.”


	46. A Good Bad Night

Four nights without Amy. Four nights of screaming nightmares. Three for Bucky, one for Steve.  
  
Bucky felt like a lost dog. Wandering back and forth between Nat and Steve. He’d spend the morning on the couch with his head in Nat’s lap. An afternoon sitting with his back against Steve’s desk. Try as he might none of the books in the suite held his attention. He couldn’t decide what he needed to do. He only knew that he needed to protect the people he loved. Even if he didn’t know how or why.  
  
Bucky didn’t have high hopes for a goodnight's sleep tonight either. Steve was just as fidgety as Bucky. He had washed the same pot four times. And looked set to scrub the floor if no one intervened.  
  
Bucky had an idea to distract both of them from what was missing. If neither of them was going to sleep, they might as well deliberately not sleep.  
  
“Hi.” Steve laughed as Bucky trailed kisses along his neck.  
  
“Help me relax?” Bucky rolled the last word around his tongue. It tasted good. He bit his lip and leaned against the edge of the counter. There were some other more interesting things he wanted to taste. Steve. Ideally every inch of Steve. Every inch that had been denied to him for so long. Steve was his now. All his to kiss, and cuddle, and do all the things he had always wanted to do. A lifetime of fantasies that he had only scratched the surface of.  
  
“What did you have in mind?” Steve asked, curling his hands around Bucky’s hips. He loved those bedroom eyes. He wanted to melt into them.  
  
Bucky guided Steve’s hand to the bulge in his pants. He could do this. He just had to stay focused on the moment. On Steve. On how good Steve felt and how long he had been waiting for this.  
  
Steve grinned and palmed Bucky. Bucky always had known how to relax. He slipped his hand down the front of Bucky’s pants and lowered his head to kiss Bucky’s neck. They could both use a good dose of endorphins to pick their spirits up.  
  
“Bedroom?” Bucky asked hoarsely. Steve’s hand was big and warm and perfect. The only problem Bucky could think of just now was the layers of clothes separating them.  
  
They stumbled to the bedroom, mouths all over each other. Bucky grinned evilly. He was going to get his taste. He pushed Steve onto the bed.  
  
Steve landed on his back. He propped himself on his elbows so he could watch Bucky looking at him.  
  
Bucky knelt and tugged Steve’s sweatpants down to his knees. He was greeted by tight fabric, black with thin red and grey stripes. Steve’s erection strained against the cloth. Just like a present waiting to be unwrapped. “Have I mentioned I fucking love these boxer brief things?”  
  
“Amy.” Steve gasped. Those fierce grey eyes made it hard to concentrate on anything other than what Bucky was doing.  
  
“Hmm?” Bucky nuzzled Steve’s thigh. Seriously this new-fangled underwear was high on his list of things he liked about this new century. They looked amazing and they were so soft to the touch.  
  
“Amy started buying them for me. She likes…liked,” Steve corrected himself. Amy had made it pretty clear after last time that she didn’t have opinions on his underwear anymore. “Them too.”  
  
“Likes.” Bucky said definitively. He rubbed his hand over that enticing bulged. He should have known that his little Fox was responsible. She had an aesthetic eye to rival anyone in the world. He would have to thank her next time he had the chance. Maybe he would go down on his knees for her too, she’d like that.  
  
Steve groaned as Bucky rubbed him through his underwear. “I shouldn’t be thinking about Amy.”  
  
“Yeah.” Bucky pulled the underwear down, exposing Steve. The sight made his mouth water. He closed his hand around the shaft. “I might not be as good at this as she is.”  
  
Bucky started at the base, kissing his way towards the tip, hand working the length at the same time. He knew what felt good, it wasn't hard to translate receiving into giving.  
  
Steve’s eyes rolled back. Bucky wasn’t quite as polished as Amy was. He was still damn fantastic. Between his hand and his mouth, it didn’t take Bucky long to get Steve teetering on the edge of climax. Steve’s girls had drilled enough manners into his head that he could remember to warn the person giving him a blowjob that he was about to finish. Even with fireworks going off inside his skull and his skin tingling with pleasure. “Buck. I’m gonna…”  
  
Bucky tightened his hand around Steve’s hip keeping him in place as the hot thick liquid filled his mouth. Bucky licked his lips. Steve was delicious. He tasted different when it was just him. Not as sweet as when Bucky had licked him off his little Fox. Different. But still delicious. “Had fun?”  
  
“Shit Buck. You know I did.” Steve said gruffly sitting up to rub Bucky’s jaw. Fun wasn’t the word he would use to describe it. He didn’t think it went far enough. But it was as good as anything he could come up with.  
  
“My turn?” Bucky kissed the center of Steve’s palm. He was achingly hard and a little desperate to get Steve’s hands on him in a more fulfilling way.  
  
Steve grinned and scooped Bucky up onto the edge of the bed. He couldn’t put how he was feeling into words, but he could show Bucky. “Do you even have to ask?”  
  
Steve on his knees was a glorious sight. One that, Bucky wouldn’t lie, had snuck into his dreams fairly regularly since he had started having that kind of dream. He reached out to touch Steve’s face. The reality was better than anything he had dreamed. His dreams had never pecked reassuring kisses into his skin while they helped him out of his clothes. Bucky leaned back on his elbow.  
  
This was about as far as they had gotten the last few times. This seemed to be going better than any of those attempts had gone. With any luck they would both get a chance to finish. Steve kissed Bucky’s hip and sent Amy a silent prayer of thanks for showing him how to do this last time. He didn’t want to embarrass himself in front of Bucky. He planned to give as good as he got today. Maybe even better.  
  
He started the same way Bucky had, stroking his length and kissing around the base of his shaft.  
  
“Stop.” Bucky's voice cracked. A grey haze was growing around the edges of his vision. Something acidic tickled at the back of his throat. He was losing himself. He couldn't lose himself. Not with Steve so vulnerable.  
  
Steve froze. “What’s wrong?”  
  
“I can’t. I just….” Bucky squeezed his eyes shut and tried to centre himself again. Fucking fuck. Every time his dick got involved his brain freaked out.  
  
“It’s alright.” Steve kissed Bucky’s knee reassuringly. Bucky had been through a lot. They needed to go slow. The needed to be realistic in their expectations and not push too hard. “Do you want to cuddle?”  
  
Bucky rubbed the back of Steve's neck. He hadn’t done anything. He was still himself and Steve was still safe. He took a long deep breath.  
  
“Yeah. Yeah, that sounds good.” He might not be able to fuck his boy, but he could spend all night wrapped around him, and he could kiss him as much as he wanted. That was something.  
  
Steve wrapped Bucky in his arms and shifted them both back onto the pillows.  
  
Bucky nuzzled into Steve’s chest. “I’m sorry. I should be able to do this by now. I want to do this.”  
  
Steve cupped Bucky’s face and made him look up at him. “You have nothing to apologise for. Recovery isn’t a straight line. And I don’t care about the sex.”  
  
He kissed Bucky long and slow and lovingly. This was enough. This was more than he could ever have hoped for. He would live like a monk for the rest of his life if it meant Bucky was safe and with him. “Go to sleep, Buck. Sleep always make you feel better.”  
  
“You make me feel better.” Bucky grumbled and pulled Steve closer. His eyes felt hot and gritty. Steve might not care, but he did. He wanted to be able to ravage Steve anytime he wanted to. It had been amazing when they had pulled it off. There was one variable that had been there when everything had gone right and missing when he broke down. “When is Amy back?”  
  
“Soon.” Steve said rubbing circles on Bucky’s back.  
  
Bucky scuffed his stubble against Steve’s chest. Not soon enough. Apart from anything else, he missed the weight of her on-top of them. “You love her.”  
  
Steve’s hand stilled. “I love you Buck.”  
  
“You can love more than one person, punk.” Steve loved her. Bucky… he didn’t know how to categorise his feelings for her. He had a lot of them. She was the safety net they needed. Bucky tightened his grip on Steve. No matter what he wouldn’t hurt Steve. And Amy wouldn’t let him hurt Steve.  
  
Steve kissed the top of Bucky’s head and started rubbed his back again. He could. But that didn’t make it fair to either of them.  
  
*****  
  
Amy dropped her gear bag by the door to the suite. The shaft of her naginata clattered against the floor. She dragged herself into the kitchen all her limbs felt heavy. These last few months were wearing her down. She couldn’t think of the last time she had gotten hurt this many times in quick succession. She needed time to rest and to heal. She was losing weight again and she didn’t have a lot of extra to spare. She had tried to eat more while she was at home, but even with the break from using her powers, her stomach had bugged her all week. Dai had noticed. He had worried, and grumbled about her not having anyone to look after her. Which wasn't fair. She didn't _need_ anyone to look after her. She was perfectly capable of taking care of herself... Theoretically.  
  
Food, rest, reduced stress, there were easily a dozen things she needed if she was going to claim she was looking after herself properly. But right now, what she needed more than anything else was ice. She had bandaged the hand shaped burn on her left arm, but the entire area was hot and throbbing.  
  
The kitchen wasn’t empty when Amy shuffled in. Nat was perched on the counter. She hadn’t bothered to turn on a light. Light by the glow of her phone playing a telenovela, a half-eaten bowl of ice cream balanced on one knee. She raised her spoon in greeting. “Hey.”  
  
“Hey.” Amy leaned against the counter next to Nat. She had had a very long day and it was good to see her friend. Of all the people in the suite she was the least likely to ask irritating questions about her injuries. “Did you know that there is a Bio lab out of Singapore making a bootleg version of Extremis?”  
  
“I did not. When did you find out?” Nat said eyeing her friends as she attempted to hide the fact she was favouring her left side pretty heavily.  
  
Amy held up her bandaged arm. “Later than I should have. Their primary research was Alzheimer’s drugs. Which was why I was there. I thought their most recent innovation might help.” A highly experimental drug that was supposed to rewired neural connections. She had dropped all the files she had managed to retrieve off with Shuri and sent an anonymous email to report the facility. Let Tony clean up that mess, if he could get permission. She hoped the drug would help otherwise she had wasted a lot of time and gotten hurt for nothing.  
  
Natasha made up a towel full of crushed ice and passed it to her friend. “They do not deserve you.”  
  
“Maybe.” Amy shrugged, she disagreed. She thought they deserved more than her. They deserved the world. They deserved a happy and peaceful life together. “But I do deserve a goodnight’s sleep.”  
  
*****  
  
Someone was knocking on Amy’s door. Three sharp raps, a pause, three sharp raps. Not incessant, but urgent. The sound roused Amy from a fitful sleep. Eyes still closed Amy ran through the list of possible culprits. Shuri’s knock was more erratic, Nat wouldn’t knock, Bucky would knock and then just come in. Which left Steve. Sweet determined, infuriating Steve. He wouldn’t give up until she answered.  
  
She grabbed a knee length silk robe and cinched it tight. This had better be an emergency.  
  
Amy yanked the door open irritably. It was Steve, hand raised to knock again. “What?”  
  
Steve pushed past her into her room and flopped on her futon. He needed his Amy. Ideally, he needed his Amy to let him rest his head in her lap and smile down at him in that perfect way she did, but he would settle for her listening and talking him through his problems. There was no one else he could put this on, and in a lot of ways they were her problems as much as his.  
  
“How do you make impossible decisions? Not life or death ones. Unfortunately, I have way too much experience making those. But ones about people I love... I suck at those. How am I supposed to know if he really loves me or if he just thinks he owes me? I know I love him, but what if I’m projecting? And then there is you. Where do you fit in to all of this? I love you. And you...are here...” He thought she still loved him. Was he abusing that love if he kept asking for her help? How did she actually feel about Bucky? She seemed sweet on him, but that could just be an act, or spill over affection because _he_ cared about Bucky. Should he be encouraging her to leave? To find someone who could love her with all the complications he represented.  
  
Not an emergency then. She scrubbed at her face. “What time is it?”  
  
“About three in the morning. I needed to wait until Bucky was asleep so I could talk to you.” Once they figured out what was going on, they could loop Bucky in. He was sure that the current state of limbo wasn’t helping with Bucky’s stability.  
  
She had gotten in at one, and it had taken her the better part of an hour to drop off. No wonder she was still tired. She needed new pillows or maybe more ice for her arm. There had to be a reason it had taken so long to fall asleep and she refused to believe the part of her mind that told her it was because Steve and Bucky were in the next room. “And the fact _I _was asleep?”  
  
“I couldn’t wait any longer.” Steve lifted his head to look at her. He had hardly been able to wait at all. He needed Amy. Any Amy. “Why didn’t you come to bed with us anyway? Don't you like sleeping in our bed?”  
  
Amy pushed her hair back from her face with her injured arm. It burned in protest and she mentally cursed herself for letting her opponent get a hand on her dominant arm. In her defence she had removed the hand at the wrist _before_ he had grabbed her, and limb regrowth wasn’t something she normally had to worry about. The physical pain was grating at her carefully constructed mental defences.  
  
She hurt and Steve being here was only reminding her of what she wanted and couldn’t have. He belonged to Bucky now. She might ignore that fact and indulge and let herself pretend that both of them could be hers when she was in bed with them. But right now, when she was hurt and vulnerable, she couldn’t pretend. The world had proved to her enough times that it was anything but kind and she didn’t want to be reminded of how often she still forgot. “Steve. Why exactly are you here?”  
  
“Who else am I supposed to talk to about this?” She should have come to him by now. Either to lay with her head beside his carefully not touching him. Or if she was feeling less standoffish to tuck herself under his head and rub his temples. He propped himself up on his elbows so he could see all of her. The sleeve of her robe had fallen back, leaving the expanse of white bandage visible.  
  
Bandage. Amy hadn’t had a bandage when she had left. She was supposed to be going home to hold a baby and attend some parties. Not getting herself into trouble. “What happened to your arm?”  
  
Amy bit her lip. She really couldn’t do this. Not now. Not while she was exhausted, and her arm was throbbing. “Okay. Okay.” She grabbed her pillow off the bed and stormed out of the room towards the room Steve and Bucky were sharing. There was a simple solution to this, and she was going to use it.  
  
Steve followed her. She was upset. He shouldn’t have woken her up. He hoped she didn’t think that he had only come to talk to her because he wanted her to come to bed. He did want her to come to bed, but he wanted her to come because she wanted to, not to appease him. He also still wanted to talk about things, but it was late. It was probably better to wait until they were both more awake. Maybe during Bucky’s nap. He should have waited in the first place he just... He needed her.  
  
Bucky was still sprawled in the bed. Hand stretched out looking for Steve in his sleep. He looked so calm and peaceful. Chest bare, grey striped boxers low on his hips, his damaged shoulder shoved under a pillow. A habit he had picked up when Amy started sleeping on that side. He didn’t like when she woke up with a mark on her face from his metal shoulder. Amy would feel bad about what she had planned if she wasn’t so irritated.  
  
Amy threw her pillow hard at Bucky’s head. “Wake up and get your ass out here.”  
  
Bucky shot up in bed, knife in hand. Amy ignored the brandished blade and stalked off to the living room.  
  
Bucky narrowed his eyes at Steve. Amy was back and she was already upset. He set the knife on the bedside table. “What did you do?”  
  
Steve offered him a hand to help him out of the bed. “Why does it have to be my fault?”  
  
“Because when a cute girl is mad at us it’s always your fault.” Bucky pulled him into a head lock and kissed Steve’s temple. Whatever it was, Amy always forgave them, and then he could talk to her about helping with his little problem.  
  
Steve wanted to argue with that. But it was hard to argue with anything when Bucky had an arm around his neck. Especially when he was at least partially right.  
  
Amy’s robe had come untied in her angry pacing. The crane patterned silk flapping open over her navy satin nightgown. Bucky took a moment to appreciate the sight of her legs as they shuffled into the living room after her. He always had been a leg guy, and hers were firm, toned, and perfectly shaped. He couldn’t wait to get his hands on them again…hand. He didn’t think that was going to happen tonight though.  
  
“Sit. Both of you. Just sit.” Amy pushed her hair back from her face the strands kept falling back into her eyes. She needed to start braiding it back at night. Or she could just cut it all off again. The black dye was washing out faster lately anyway. She had missed her long hair though, and it had taken so long to grow out. Thinking about her hair was not helping her irritation. She snapped her attention to the two men settled nervously on the couch. One problem at a time.  
  
Steve and Bucky huddled together like children called in front the principal. Something they had some experience with. Steve had more complicated feelings about Amy disciplining him than he had towards any of the nuns, but he would happily let her rap his knuckles if she promised to kiss them better after.  
  
“New rule. New rule that I honestly never thought I’d have to make.” She fisted the hand in her hair. All she wanted was a goodnight sleep. They could break her heart with how in love with each other they were tomorrow. She could be supportive tomorrow. She just needed one night. “If either of you, wakes me up while I’m trying to recover from an injury to talk to me about how in love with the other one you are, I will smoother you with a pillow. Do you understand?”  
  
They both sat very still for a moment. Struck by the vehemence of her threat. Neither doubted she was fully capable of it if she really put her mind to it.  
  
Bucky raised his hand tentatively. He wasn’t worried about the injury. She was up and walking around. It couldn’t be that bad. He'd make sure she got lots of fluid and protein in the morning. The important thing was she was home. “We can still talk to you about it at other times, though right?”  
  
She took a deep breath. “If you must.” Her life would be easier if they didn’t, but she couldn’t cut them off like that. If they needed her, she would be there for them.  
  
Steve thrust his hand into the air. Screw Bucky and his appeasing tone. This wasn’t him being an idiot. This was her being stubborn. “Can we wake you up to talk about how in love with _you_ we are?” That was why he had gone to her in the first place. Not because he was in love with Bucky… not just because he was in love with Bucky. Because he was in love with both of them and it was tearing him apart.  
  
“Seriously you want to antagonise her _now?_ ” Bucky hissed. Amy was moments away from washing her hands of both of them and leaving. Also known as the opposite of what he wanted. What they needed to do was placate her and go back to bed where they could cuddle her until her until her irritation fully dissipated. His fingers found the bead with the message she had recorded for him. Amy couldn’t leave.  
  
“I’m just trying to figure out the rules.” Steve growled back.  
  
Bucky looked at Amy with pleading eyes. He was in love with an idiot who didn’t know when to retreat. She loved him too, she had to understand that. “People don’t really think he was the well behaved one, do they?”  
  
“It’s a valid question!”  
  
Bucky elbowed Steve. “It is you being a shit disturber.”  
  
“You are both idiots.” Amy covered her face with her hands. Adorable idiots that made her want to laugh and throw herself into their arms. Gods, she needed sleep, or these invasive fantasies were only going to get worse.  
  
“I mean yeah, but we’re your idiots.” Bucky said stretching his arm along the back of the couch. It was good to have them both here, even if Steve was determined to cause trouble and Amy was angry at them. He could see the laughter growing in the corners of her eyes. She was all ready getting over her irritation.  
  
Amy softened. She never could stay mad at them. Not even when she really should. “Well my idiots need to figure stuff out without me, and I need to go back to sleep. I will see you in six hours.”  
  
She kissed the top of Bucky’s head, flicked Steve on the ear, stiffened her spine, and walked confidently back to her room. A good night’s sleep and she would be able to handle anything. Just one night.  
  
Bucky leaned back, the better to watch her leave. Yeah. He liked those legs. And that fire. Searing or gentle depending on how you caught her. No. Not fire. Ice. Jagged ice. Smooth on one side sharp on the other. And cracking under whatever strain Steve was putting on her.  
  
He looked back at Steve who was rubbing his ear. “What did you wake her up to talk about?”  
  
“Does it matter?” Steve sighed and propped his elbows on his knees. He might as well tell Bucky. If he couldn’t work through it, Buck should at least know why he was so off balance. “I was hoping she would help talk me through being in love with both of you.”  
  
Bucky sighed. He was going to be on Amy’s side on this one. That wasn’t new. And he could understand why she didn’t want to deal with it while she was hurt. “That couldn’t wait until she woke up? Or you could talk to me?”  
  
Steve sighed. Trust Bucky to not see the problem with that plan. “I can’t talk to you. How am I supposed to know if you are doing things because you want to or because you think you owe me?”  
  
“Ask! Literally ask. I have been in love with you since you were thirteen and punched Danny Banks for trying to look up Poppy Moore’s skirt. I wanted to kiss you every time you got all passionate and flighty. Do you know how many back alleys I had to drag you out of when all I wanted to do was press you up against a wall and make you scream my name? I see you in my dreams. When things got bad, memories of you would come to me and tell me not to give up, that as long as I was still fighting, they weren’t winning. I want you so much. God Stevie, I can’t begin to tell you how much and how long I have loved you. I love you. I want you. I just… can’t… I’m scared I’ll hurt you…” Bucky slumped a little in his seat. It had been a long speech, and not exactly the one he had been planning on. The words had just tumbled out of him once he started, but they were all true.  
  
Steve dropped to his knees in front of the couch. “Bucky. I don’t want you to do anything because you think you owe me. You don’t owe anyone anything. I love you and I want to be with you in anyway that I can, as much as I can.”  
  
Bucky cupped Steve’s cheek, smoothing his thumb along that perfect jaw. “I owe you my life and I would die to protect you. I don’t owe you my love. That you can just have. Fuck Stevie, you’ve always had it, till the end of the line.”  
  
Steve rose on his knees until he could kiss Bucky. A long slow kiss that he poured all his love into. Bucky's hand moved to the back of his neck and squeezed tenderly. Bucky loved him. Bucky had always loved him. Bucky with his smirk and his dancing eyes, even his lost needy cuddling, all of it was for him. Nothing in this universe was going to come between them.  
  
Neither of them could stop huge stupid grins spreading across their faces when they finally broke apart. Bucky combed his fingers through Steve’s hair. He loved this man so fucking much. “Let’s go back to bed.”  
  
Steve looped an arm around Bucky’s neck and pulled him in close as they walked. Bucky was right, they should have had this conversation ages ago.  
  
Bucky hesitated outside Amy’s door. It would be nice to have her with them. But she had been firm about her timeline. They would all be fine for one night. He would talk to her in the morning. He was better at talking to girls than Steve was.__


	47. The Inside of Bucky's Brain

Morning still came too early for Amy. She woke up stiff, with her arm throbbing hotly, and her stomach roiling. Combined with her lingering irritation from last night, it was going to be a hard day. She needed to take care of herself this morning. That’s what Dai always told her. Take care of herself first and everyone else second. Her morning stretches worked out the stiffness. A cold shower and new dressing helped with the arm. Food would get her the rest of the way to human.  
  
Amy leaned against the counter, carefully peeling and cutting chunks off her breakfast mango. Eyes closed she chewed slowly and methodically. The tanto she was using was larger than was strictly necessary, but the weight was comforting. Between it and the perfectly ripe fruit she was starting to feel better.  
  
“What are we eating?” Bucky slid in next to her bumping his hip against hers. He had been waiting for her to wake up for over an hour.  
  
“Mango.” Amy replied around a sweet sticky mouthful. She cut off a small strip and offered it to Bucky off the tip of her knife.  
  
Bucky adored the wide variety of fresh fruit Amy kept in the suite. Fresh food had been a luxury for so many years, that trying all the new kinds was always exciting. And if his experiments frequently involved Amy or Steve hand feeding him tasty morsels, well affection had been another rarity in his life. So far, he liked Saturn peaches and kiwi. Could take or leave her fancy giant strawberries. And very much did not like leechie.  
  
Mango was new. It looked promising. Firm and orange, a trickle of juice running down the shining steel of her knife, a second down her other wrist. Carefully he bit it off the blade. Flavor exploded in his mouth, it tasted like summer. “I like this one.”  
  
Amy continued alternating bites with Bucky as he leaned against her side. Very deliberately not looking at his mouth or thinking about how sweet his lips would taste covered in sticky juice... Or how if she let him, he would happily lick her fingers clean. Probably while Steve watched with those gorgeous fuck-me eyes. It was like he could sense when Bucky had her in a delicate position.  
  
It didn’t take long for the two of them to finish off the fruit. She tossed the pit neatly into the sink across from them. Bucky stayed leaning against her. His arm around her waist and his head on her shoulder. “Are you still mad at us?”  
  
“I was never mad.” Amy said extracting herself from his hold so she could wash the juice off her knife and hands.  
  
There was a pot of tea cooling on the counter. Bucky could read body language well enough to have realised that Amy liked when she didn’t have to pour her own drink. Probably a hold over from growing up in Japan. He poured a cup and pushed it towards her. “Just disappointed?”  
  
“Just exasperated.” She sighed. He was buttering her up. It would probably work.  
  
“He worries.” Bucky said kissing the point of her shoulder. He wanted her and Steve to figure their shit out. This constant back and forth was exhausting. He might be able to relax if they weren’t on eggshells around each other all the time.  
  
“He shouldn’t. Not about me. Not anymore.” Carefully she dried her dagger on a kitchen towel. Weapons care was easy. More muscle memory than conscious effort. She wished other things in her life could be as simple.  
  
Bucky let his fingers trail over her spine. It was ramrod straight. She was holding herself together by shear force of will. He wished she would just let herself be part of their lives. He wanted her with them. “You don’t have to be alone, baby girl.”  
  
“Maybe I want to be.” She said, sheathing her dagger with a click.  
  
“Not sure even you believe that.” Bucky sighed. She was impossible. Worse than Steve when it came to her stubborn pride. Let them be impossible and miserable. He was going to ask for help when he needed it. “Shuri wants to try something today. Will you come with me?”  
  
“Of course, Bucky baby.” Amy tucked his hair behind his ear. She might want to protect her heart, but she would do almost everything for her boys… Not her boys, _the boys_. She needed to be more careful about what she called them even in her head. “I’m always here for you.”  
  
He brushed his lips against her wrist as she drew her hand back. “Just not in the middle of the night?”  
  
“Not in the middle of the night for that _one_ thing. Anything else--” She pecked him hard on the cheek. No more soft kisses. Not until she got her emotions under control. “--I’m all yours.”  
  
“ _Anything?_ ” He curled his hand around her hip and held her close. If the last few days had proved anything to him it was that he needed his little Fox and even more that he wanted her. Starting with a few long kisses, preferably kisses shared with him and Steve. Kisses and more than kisses and if everything went to plan a couple dozen years of falling asleep with happily exhausted, fantastically stubborn, beautiful people on either side of him.  
  
“Stop waggling your eyebrows at me Mr. You apparently have a procedure this afternoon.” That wasn’t the main problem with what he was implying. But it was the one he was least likely to argue with.  
  
Bucky leaned in and planted a sticky kiss on her lips. What was it about stubborn people that was so attractive? “Worth a try.”  
  
*****  
  
Steve rested his head on Amy’s lap next to Bucky’s. It had been a long couple of hours. Sitting around while Shuri scanned Bucky’s brain again and they waited to see how some new drug cocktail affected him. So far it had made his eyes glassy and sent him into a near catatonic state. Steve didn’t think this was exactly the result they were looking for. “How you doin’ Buck?”  
  
“ _YA v proyadke, ne bespokoysya obo mne, Stiv*._ ” Bucky mumbled stroking Steve’s cheek.  
  
Amy bit her lip. Bucky dropping in the Russian wasn’t a promising sign. “Do you know where you are Bucky Baby?”  
  
“Home safe in Brooklyn. Steve gave me his stupid cold. ‘s warm though. Did Steve get a commission so we can afford heat?” Bucky nuzzled into her leg.  
  
“Not quite, _Mon Loup_.” Amy cooed in a reassuring tone. No need to worry him about something he couldn’t fully control. “You are safe though, and you don’t have to sleep cold ever again.”  
  
Bucky nodded sagely. “Good, Steve don’t do well in the cold. ‘s too hard on his chest. I’m gonna make him sleep in with me tonight just in case. I’m allowed to now. Are you stayn' over baby girl? You can help me keep him warm. 'S better when you're there.”  
  
“My chest is fine.” Steve smoothed Bucky’s hair back from his face. “You gonna be alright if we step away for a sec Buck?”  
  
“Yeah. Not too long though.” He was having trouble keeping his eyes open. He wanted his pretty Fox and his Stevie to curl up with him. They could all sleep warm and happy. And together.  
  
Amy slipped off the table and kissed the top of Bucky’s head. “Not too long. We’ll be right back.”  
  
Steve towed her impatiently out of Bucky’s ear shot. “He’s losing time. He's switching languages.”  
  
Amy shrugged his hand off her arm. “I wouldn’t worry too much about the languages thing. You do that when you’re half asleep too.”  
  
“Only no one used an eggbeater to put my extra languages in my head.” Steve growled. He wanted to break the people who had hurt his Buck like this. Most of them where already taken care of. Bucky had been on a mission and the girls had done a good job of sweeping up the ones he missed.  
  
“Okay here’s the plan.” Amy pushed her hair back from her face. Bucky wasn’t getting better, and not being able to help was starting to hurt Steve. She was irritated with him, that didn’t mean she wanted to see either of them suffer like this. “Take Bucky back to the suite. Take a nap. Things always look better after some rest.”  
  
Steve ran his knuckles down her arm and drew little circles on the back of her hand. She shouldn’t have to be the one to figure all this out. He just had no idea how to help her. “What are you going to do?”  
  
Amy caught his fingers and squeezed. He was worrying. Which was understandable. None of this looked like the kind of progress they were hoping for. “I’m going to talk to Nat and Shuri. We are going to figure this out.”  
  
*****  
  
Shuri enlarged a hologram of the new scans. Bucky’s brain shimmered as neurons fired. “We need a brain surgeon.”  
  
“We don’t have a brain surgeon. Focus on finding the problem.” Nat shot back. They had been staring at these new scans for the better part of an hour and she still couldn’t see a reason for her _Otets’s_ problems. Or maybe it would be more accurate to say all she could see were reasons. She didn’t want to admit it, but they might be getting to the point where they needed a real expert.  
  
Shuri glared at her. The problem was obvious. Problems rather. “There is smallish box in his head that keeps sending out electronic pulses, whatever that thing pushing on his frontal cortex is, and all the scaring in his central sulcus. The fact he is ever in his right mind is a minor miracle.”  
  
“What is this shadow?” Amy asked pointing to a dark area near the base of Bucky’s skull. Unlike the other dark spots, it wasn’t close to any of the boxes or wires that laced his brain. “It looks like more scar tissue.”  
  
Shuri glared at the offending spot. “That is his medulla, if it was scar tissue, he wouldn’t be able to regulate his breathing or his heartrate, let alone walk around like a functional human most of the time. It is probably a congenital anomaly.”  
  
Amy frowned. Congenital anomaly made the most sense, but... "It wasn't on the original scans."  
  
"The resolution on the original scans is bad enough that it probably got lost in the background noise." Shuri answered with a shrug. The scans had helped, but they were rudimentary at best.  
  
Nat touched the back of her own skull measuring the approximate distance with her fingers. She was remembering something from her past life. “Fuck. I think I know what it is.”  
  
Shuri looked at her expectantly. “And?”  
  
Nat shoved away from the workstation she was leaning against. “My _Otets_ is an idiot, Amy’s right, and I figured out at least one of our issues.”  
  
“What? Right about what? Where are you going?” Shuri called after Natasha’s departing back.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *I'm free. Don't worry about me, Stevie.


	48. Scar Tissue

Steve paced restlessly around the living room. Some days it felt like Bucky was getting worse not better. Shuri assured him that part of that was the fact he was doing more higher order thinking and that was triggering more attacks. That wasn’t going to stop Steve from worrying. The fact that Bucky being Bucky and not the Soldier was in some ways making him worse broke Steve’s heart. The exhausted sleep Bucky fell into once he was safely back in his bed didn’t reassure Steve either. It reminded him too much of the way he had slept when he’d been sick. How had Bucky made it through so many years of Steve nearly dying on a regular basis?  
  
The door to the suite clicked open. A fraction of the weight crushing Steve lifted. Amy and Nat were back.  
  
Nat ignored him and made a B-line for the bedroom where Bucky was sleeping.  
  
Amy stopped next to him, just far enough away that she wasn’t touching him.  
  
“Still mad at me?” Steve asked brushing his knuckles against hers. He hated that careful distance.  
  
“Furious.” Amy said eyes glued to the door Natasha had disappeared behind. She didn’t like the idea that she was right. If she was right someone had cut into the back of Bucky’s head, and not the surgical precise kind of cutting that had left all the other things inside him.  
  
Steve looked down at the spot where their hands met. She hadn’t pulled away. That was something. “Is that going to stop you from hugging me right now?”  
  
“No, _Mon Ours_. It won’t.” Amy whispered. Bucky's procedures were always hard on Steve. She completely understood why he might need a hug.  
  
Steve crushed Amy to his chest, breathing in the reassuring sent of her hair. He’d lost track of how many times he’d almost died over the years. He’d never been as scared as he was for Bucky.  
  
Amy nestled her cheek in the hollow of his shoulder. She squeezed him as hard as she could. People put too much on Steve. Especially Steve himself. He couldn’t carry the world all on his own. Someone needed to look after him. She couldn’t do much, but she could hold him.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky stretched and blinked. A good nap always made him feel better. He was surprised to find the bed empty. Normally he could count on at least one of his people to be curled up with him. Steve would read. Amy would either work or nap with him. He looked around. Natasha was perched on the nightstand. Bucky smiled. His little girl, so fierce, so free. She was by far the best thing he had been involved with in 70 years. “ _Ryzhiy_ , you’re a nice surprise. You’re almost never the one waiting for me.”  
  
“They worry.” Nat said dismissively. Steve and Amy’s coddling wasn’t what Bucky needed right now. “Why didn’t you tell us about the tracking device?”  
  
Bucky cracked his spine. He wasn’t fully awake yet. Had they found another tracking device during the scan and he had missed it? “What tracking device?”  
  
Natasha flicked him hard in the temple. “The one you dug out of your skull with a hunting knife from the looks of it.”  
  
“I didn’t think it was a big deal.” Bucky grumbled rubbing the stinging spot. Why did she care about that tracker? He’d taken that out as soon as he was back in his right mind. If he hadn’t Hydra would have recaptured him almost as soon as he’d gotten away, chaos or no chaos. “I got it out years ago. And it was a ka-bar.”  
  
Something snapped inside Nat. This was serious. “It doesn’t really matter what it what you used. You nicked your brain stem you idiot. Your body’s been compensating pretty well thanks to how much extra electricity there is in your brain and your healing factor, but it obviously can’t handle it when you’re stressed or excited. We couldn’t figure out what was causing the seizures because Shuri didn’t think you’d be able to function with that kind of damage and what she thought was a congenital defect couldn’t be causing them because you didn’t have them before. And you didn’t think to tell us that you dug around in the back of your skull with a knife.”  
  
The silence after Nat’s diatribe was fragile. Too much emotion trying to fill too small a space.  
  
Bucky took her hand and squeezed gently. He hadn’t meant to worry his little girl. She was so much stronger than he had ever been. “I’m sorry.”  
  
Nat sniffed. She was absolutely not going to cry. Even when he was the one who needed looking after her _Otets_ still made her feel like a little girl. “I don’t want to lose you again, you idiot. I don’t have a lot of family left.”  
  
Bucky pulled her into a warm hug. He didn’t want to hurt any of the members of his little family. He would do better. “You’ve got me, _Ryzhevolosaya Decochka_. I’m not going anywhere.”  
  
Nat sniffed again and hid her face in his shoulder. The last few months had been a lot. She was glad she had her _Otets_ back. She just wished it wasn’t at the expense of everything else she had built since she’d escaped the Red Room.  
  
Bucky rubbed her back soothingly. His poor little girl. He wondered how many people she let herself be weak around. Steve a little, and occasionally Amy from what he had seen. But was there anyone else? Had his little girl ever been in love?  
  
He really needed to learn more about what she had been doing with her freedom. He decided to start small. “How did you get your tracker out?”  
  
Nat tried to glare at him. It was hard to keep any ice in it when he was so earnest. “I bribed a vet. Who stabs knives into their own head?”  
  
Bucky smiled. The kid really was alright. “In my defence, I have a brain thing.”  
  
Nat flicked him in the temple again and pulled out of the hug. “Too soon _Otets_ , too soon.”  
  
*****  
  
Steve sighed and kiss the top of Amy’s head. The hug had helped centre him more than anything else he could think off. He might not be able to help Bucky right now, but someone else he loved needed some attention too. And her he might actually be able to help. “How is your arm?”  
  
“I should change my dressings.” Amy confessed pulling out of the too soothing embrace. She might have needed the hug as much as he did.  
  
Steve tangled their fingers together. That he could deal with. “Let me?”  
  
Amy looked down at their joined hands. She wanted to let him. He was always so gentle with his hands. Bucky wouldn’t mind, if he was awake, she could almost guarantee he would insist on her sitting in his lap while Steve looked after her. She would let herself have this. Let them both have this. “Only because you'll be able to get the bandage flatter than I would be able to.”  
  
Steve lifted her hand to his lips and kissed her knuckles. “Sure, sweetheart. Whatever you say.”  
  
Steve took extra care to make sure the new dressing was neat and secure. If Amy needed the excuse of having this done properly to let him coddle her a little, he wasn’t about to disappoint her. "Do you need antibiotics? Penicillin or something?"  
  
Amy closed her eyes, and ignored the part of her mind telling her to climb into his lap. "I'm allergic to penicillin."  
  
Steve's fingers stilled on her arm. Allergic. Had she told him that before? Had he asked?  
  
Amy opened one eye. He was frozen, frowning at the half finished bandage. "What?"  
  
Slowly, Steve started wrapping again. Hands busy, he racked his mind for details of her staying with him during her recovery. She had mostly been off antibiotics by the time she'd come to say with him. Of all the medications she had been on, he could only remember one antibiotic, Clarithomycin. Which he thought was a different strain entirely. He couldn't remember asking for details about why she was on all the medications she'd been on. He'd just figured out her schedule and made sure she stuck to it. "Why didn't I know that?"  
  
"Why would you?" Amy deliberately leaned back into the arm of the couch, rather than in against him.  
  
"Because..." Steve hesitated. Because she loved him, and he loved her, and that kind of allergy was important for your life partner to know about. Except, she had always thought she would have to give him up at some point, so why would she tell him... "I don't know. Just feels like something I should have known."  
  
He was terrified of losing one or both of them. That was what he’d been trying to tell her last night. He may have gone about it all wrong, but that was the main thing. He loved them both and he had no idea what to do about it. He knew, _he knew_ , that he should let her go. The very idea felt like cutting off a limb. He shifted closer to her, leaning his head on her shoulder. "I love you."  
  
“We really need to work on your bad habit of telling me that.” Amy whispered back but didn’t pull away. She couldn’t pull away. Not when it was obvious, he was drowning in the fear of losing Bucky and she could offer a little comfort, however superficial.  
  
*****  
  
Nat sighed at the pair on the couch. How these people could fawn all over each other without admitting to their feelings was beyond her. “He's all yours.”  
  
“Thoroughly chastised I trust?” Amy stat up straighter, putting a more respectable distance between herself and Steve at the same time.  
  
“I think so.” Nat sighed. It was always hard to tell with these boys. They were too hard-headed for their own good.  
  
Steve shifted his attention to the bedroom door. Practically vibrating with the need to go to Bucky. He and Amy had been having a moment though. It had almost felt like things were getting better. But if Bucky was awake again after such a rough day...  
  
Amy smiled and squeezed his hand before pushing it away. “Go on. I'll be in in a bit.”  
  
Steve kissed the top of her head. That would do. Bucky would want to see her too.  
  
Nat slumped into the couch and rubbed her eyes. “I think you are projecting when it is just the three of you.”  
  
“What?” Everything about Amy tensed up. She’d been stressed lately, but she didn’t think it was bad enough that her control was slipping.  
  
“Relax.” Nat rubbed her eyes and leaned back in the couch. “I don’t think it is a loss of control or anything. I think you are subconsciously reading him, and you know when he needs a little help staying level. If what I think is happening in his brain is really what’s happening, it wouldn’t take a lot of your power to keep him from overloading, especially not if what you’re projecting is just a steady confident love.”  
  
Amy considered. She was sensitive to people she cared about. It would explain why she kept waking up feeling like she’d been using her powers. Although projecting had never made her sick before, but then she hadn’t done anything sustained with that particular ability since she’d gotten her control back. There was just one problem with Nat's theory. “Without contact, I can only project what I’m actually feeling. If that were true I’d have to--“  
  
“Who exactly are you lying to?” Nat snapped. She was getting very tired of Amy’s aloof too cool for love act. “Because it isn’t fooling me, and I don’t think it is actually fooling you either.”  
  
*****  
  
Amy paused in the door to the bedroom. They looked so perfect. Bucky lounging in the middle of the bed. Steve curled next to him. Their hands and heads together. She knew Nat was right. They had her heart firmly in their hands.  
  
Bucky looked up and beamed at her. “There’s my girl. She'll agree with me.”  
  
Amy felt a knot I her chest untie itself. She had been worried about how he would bounce today. Sometimes these procedures knocked him off balance for days. This looked like it was going to be a good day. “I almost never agree with you.”  
  
“Bucky thinks I should grow a beard.” Steve said squeezing Bucky’s fingers tenderly. He'd also cut something out of his head and hadn't bothered to tell any of the people trying to figure out what was going on in his brain, so maybe not sharing health information unless asked directly was something the people he loved had in common.  
  
Bucky rubbed their linked hands over Steve’s jaw where a hint of tawny stubble was starting to grow in. He met Amy’s eyes, watching for the tiny flickers in their depths that gave away her thoughts. “Tell him he’d look good with a beard.”  
  
“You should grow a beard. A lot of the work you guys have planned is in the middle East.” Amy perched herself on her side of the bed. She knew exactly what he was trying to do and she wasn’t about to let herself get drawn into it. She’d already indulged too much today. “It will be easier to earn the trust of the locals if you don’t look like… What is it Shuri calls him?”  
  
“Coloniser.” Bucky grinned. Shuri was such a force of nature. She had gotten on the ‘teasing Steve is fun’ train right away. He kissed the place where his hand was linked with Steve’s. Everyone here seemed to just accept that he and Steve belonged together, it was nice, it still felt like a miracle to Bucky. Now they just needed Amy to figure out that she belonged with them too, and they would be all set. “Plus, it would look really sexy.”  
  
Amy smiled and curled her feet under her. “Yes, having Steve be harder to pick up with facial recognition would be very sexy.”  
  
“I feel like we are coming at this from very different angles.” Bucky shoved her with his knee. He wanted her to slide over and cuddle against his chest. That would be such a cosy way to spend the afternoon.  
  
Amy nudged him back. “I feel like you think you can pressure me into playing your game because you had a rough day.”  
  
“I feel like I’m growing a beard.” Steve sighed watching the people he loved flirt in his bed. They might have different reasons why they thought it was a good idea, but they did both think it was a good idea.  
  
“Yes. That is a win for Barnes. Tune in next week when our intrepid hero convinces the lovely little Fox that she doesn’t really need to wear shorts to bed.” Bucky said in something that resembled a vintage radio announcer's voice.  
  
Amy raised her eyebrows. Someone was feeling particularly frisky this afternoon. “I could start wearing pajama pants if you prefer.”  
  
“Shh. The intrepid hero needs his rest.” Bucky rolled onto his side. Dragging Steve with him by the hand and nuzzling into Amy’s lap in the same motion. More clothes was absolutely the opposite of what he wanted from either of these people, and she knew it.  
  
Amy sighed and stroked his hair. “Are you sure this guy is worth it? He’s kind of a jerk.”  
  
“Pretty sure.” Steve said smothering a laugh. That was the same voice Bucky had always used to make fun to his propaganda films either when they got to screen the films before they ran, or when they pulled of something stupidly impressive that would never make it to film.  
  
Bucky grumbled and tightened his grip on both of them. Despite everything this was definitely worth it.


	49. Different Kinds of Flirting

Naginata practice had done next to nothing to help Amy manage her complicated emotions. She needed to express not just repress today. That meant dancing. The first soft strains of the song Amy had chosen drifted through the air. She started to dance. Rolling onto her back. Contract three counts, hold one count, relax three counts, hold. Smooth slow controlled movements. Not the heavily regulated and symbolic gestures of her childhood. Graceful modern motions filled with the emotion of the song and the pent-up emotions she had been trying to repress. She arched her back, walking over on to her feet.  
  
Two controlled steps forward. Amy took a deep breath, waiting for the music to hit. The beat kicked int. She spun, feet barely touching the ground. Reached out, lengthening from the balls of her feet to the very ends of her fingertips, stretching up and forward until she reached the very edge of where she could balance without falling forward. Instead she twisted in on herself, coiling back to the ground.  
  
Someone was watching her. Probably Nat. She could wait until Amy finished. She needed to get these emotions out somehow. It was dance or scream and weep. She rolled onto her stomach. Her impossible boys. So in love with each other, but constantly looking to her. She couldn’t have them. She couldn’t. They would tire of her and losing them would break her. Or they would die, and her spirit would die with them. She had lost the chance at a happy ending when she had turned her collar. She was a goddess.  
  
She launched herself back into the air. A long leap, ending on one foot, using her momentum to turn her landing into a spin. Step out of the spin. One leg up into a perfect vertical split, toes pointed. Pivot on the supporting leg. Pushing off the ball of her foot Amy went nearly horizontal in the air, landed on her other foot and fan kicked into another set of splits. Another spin. Arabesque. She and gravity were passing acquaintances at best.  
  
Amy let herself drop. Sprawling full length on the floor. Her fingers closing into a desperate fist around the last strains of music.  
  
The wolf whistle and sound of someone slapping their thigh, made her snap into a sitting position.  
  
“Bucky?” Amy scrambled to her feet. How much had he seen? How much had he _guessed?_ “What are you doing here?”  
  
“I came to see if you wanted a sparring partner. Now I think I want to watch you do that again.” He licked his lips and sidled closer to her. This century was great, whoever invented leggings deserved a Nobel Prize. So did whoever bought Amy the tank top that hugged her curves and let her lacy little brallette peak out at the top, all straps and glimpses of skin.  
  
Amy dropped her eyes. She could feel a blush creeping over her chest. How did he do that with his eyes? She was used to men looking at her like they wanted to tear her clothes off. It had been happening since she was fourteen. By now it was more irritating than anything. With Bucky it was different. He definitely wanted to tear her clothes off, but it felt like it was to get to _her_ , not just her body. It was the same with Steve. The physical appreciation was there, but so was something _more_.  
  
Bucky wrapped his arm around Amy’s waist and pulled her in against him. Pretty little Fox. With her tempting legs and even more tempting eyes. And that blush. How could someone so deadly look so vulnerable? He wondered if he could drive her as crazy as she drove him. He could feel her breath heaving. A vicious glee grew inside him. She hadn’t been breathing that hard before he touched her. He dropped his head to her neck. Growling low in his chest as he nipped at her soft skin. “God, baby girl. I would take you right here if you let me.”  
  
“Bucky.” Amy breathed. The word catching in her throat.  
  
“Do you really think saying my name like that is going to make me think stopping is a good idea.” Bucky purred mouthing his way along her collar bone.  
  
“Bucky.” The name came out forceful this time. A stern rebuke. She set her hand in the centre of his chest and pushed gently. He knew they couldn’t do this. They had talked about why.  
  
“Yeah. Fine. You win.” Bucky relented. She didn’t want him right now. Or at least she didn’t want to want him. Either way, he would wait until she changed her mind. That didn’t mean he was going to let her go. He sank down the wall, pulling her down next to him with his arm around her. They sat next to each other, Amy’s head on his shoulder, Bucky's arm tight around her waist. He took a few deep steadying breathes. His face pressed into her hair. “Do you always dance like that?”  
  
“Like what?” Amy asked trying to get her heart-rate back under control. No jumping the boys. It was a simple rule. So why was it so hard to follow? “Modern lyrical isn’t my go-to if that’s what you mean.”  
  
“It’s not.” He kissed her temple softly. “You put your entire heart into it. Just like everything.”  
  
Amy shook her head. There were very few things she put her heart into. He just had a sampling error. “Where’s Steve?”  
  
“Working in the living room.” Bucky twisted a stray lock of her hair around his finger.  
  
Amy sighed and tipped her head into his hand. Her sweet boy. She did hate to let him down. They might not be allowed to fool around, but that wasn’t the only option he had suggested. The other option would burn off the energy almost as well. “Go get him. I want a safety net if we are going to spar.”  
  
Safety Net. An interesting choice of words coming from her. Amy was arguably safer around him than anyone else was. She could always stop him. Unless she was scared she wouldn’t want to stop him. “Safety net in case I lose control or in case I try to kiss you again?”  
  
Amy glared at him. He knew perfectly well that she wasn’t scared of him losing control. He hadn’t had a bad slip in the last month. A few nightmares. The occasional seizure since that damn implant in his prefrontal cortex was still throwing off sparks. The scar tissue in his medulla was still an issue. But he always knew who he was. Where and when we’re less important. “Are you going to get him or not?”  
  
Bucky smirked. That was as good as an answer. “Just curious how far under your skin I got.”  
  
He kissed her cheek again before he rocked to his feet and went to find Steve. One kind of workout was almost as good as another. In all likelihood he would still get to run his hand all over her this way. They could flirt and fight and he could pin her to the ground.  
  
Amy starred at the empty door. All the way. He always got all the way under. Climbed into her heart and curled up like he belonged there.  
  
By the time the boys got back she had wrapped her hands and made sure her bun was secure. Her defences were firmly back in place and she was ready for them.  
  
“How does this end? First point?” Steve asked sliding down the wall. He was curious to see how this went. Amy and Bucky both had that predatory edged to them. What would them fighting together even look like? His mind kept supplying him with scenarios, but since most of them involved them tearing each other’s clothes off, he didn’t think they were likely.  
  
Amy considered. Prowling around Bucky with long even paces. Finding her footing and her range. “First point or surrender. I doubt I’ll have much luck getting Bucky’s shoulders on the ground. He is somewhat stronger than I am.”  
  
“Any rules I should know about?” Bucky asked following Amy’s progress around the room out of the corner of his eye.  
  
She smiled and stepped out of view. Bucky turned his head to follow. He was watching. Good. Watching meant he was looking for signals of what she was about to do. Which meant he gave off signals. “No biting.”  
  
Bucky turned all the way around to face her. Right now, Amy was a predator, but she still wasn't a threat. It wasn't that she wasn't dangerous. He just knew instinctively that she wouldn't hurt him. “I thought you liked it?”  
  
Amy resisted the urge to lick her lips and purr something about how he knew she did. This wasn’t the time or place and she wasn’t the right person for him. “Are we going to spar or are you going to flirt?”  
  
“Can’t I do both?” Bucky grinned and made his first lunge for her. He caught empty air. Little Fox was fast.  
  
She ducked in. Landed two quick punches on his ribs. Amy followed the strike by trailing her fingers softly over the spot on the way out. A subtle reassurance that this wasn’t serious.  
  
Bucky appreciated the little teasing touches. There was always the risk of the soldier taking over in situations like this. Amy’s caresses helped keep him centred. He twisted. Turning a round house into a grab at her right wrist. If he could get a hold on her, he could get her to the ground. If he got her to the ground, he could get her on her back. If he got her on her back, he won. And he could claim a kiss as his prize.  
  
Amy sidestepped Bucky’s lunge. He'd over extended. A quick kick to the back of the knee threw off his rhythm and sent him stumbling away. “You used to be faster.”  
  
“I used to not have to think about what I was doing.” Bucky grumbled trying to get her lined up for another pass. She never stopped moving though. There wasn’t even the fraction of a second hesitation most people had while they picked their targets. She was liquid, violent liquid, for all she peppered in gentle touches and playful smiles.  
  
“So, don’t think. Your muscles remember. Let them.” Amy whirled out of his reach again, indulging in a quick stroke of his arm on the way by. He was good. Without the handicap of his missing arm she could have been in trouble.  
  
That was easy for her to say. Bucky couldn’t help trying to think two or three moves ahead of her. The problem was Amy didn’t seem to want to make the moves he expected. He’d move to intercept the obvious advance and she’d doge around him. She could have landed any number of shots to his spine. Instead she raked her nails down his back. He’d turn to meet her expecting her to retreat and she’d duck inside his guard.  
  
Two more passes ended in stalemate. Bucky was fast and strong. It was taking Amy longer than she cared to admit to find his precise patterns. She had expected him to fight like Nat. And that was there. But there was more Steve in his movements than she had expected. That same lack of refinement. The telltale wide swings of someone who learned to brawl in the streets.  
  
“You got this Buck. Pin her to the ground.” Steve called from his place against the wall. And then kiss her until she’s moaning with pleasure and writhing under you. Then ask me to come help. Steve managed to stop himself voicing the second half of the thought.  
  
Bucky appreciated the vote of confidence, but he didn’t think he was going to get Amy on the ground without her cooperation. He couldn’t get a grip on her to save his life. She slipped through his fingers like water. The way she darted in and out, he would be in the shit if she had a knife instead of empty hands.  
  
“Okay. I yield. You win.” Bucky panted leaning on his knees. This was more of a workout than he’d had in months. It was fun, but he was ready to laydown now.  
  
“You say that like there was ever a doubt.” Amy teased and kissed the top of his head.  
  
Bucky made a playful half-hearted attempt to grab her around the waist. Amy danced lightly away. Darting in on his left to kiss his cheek. He couldn’t help smiling. She called him an incorrigible flirt, but she was just as bad.  
  
Steve chuckled and rocked to his feet. He was a little tired of just watching. Bucky was down for the count, but Amy looked like she could handle another round. “You’re warmed up then, sweetheart?”  
  
Amy smirked and rolled her shoulders. She had missed this. Sparing with the Dora was fun, but none of them could really stand against her one on one. They were trained to fight as a unit. And against a unit big them, she was in trouble. Nat had been her only individual partner for months now, and they were getting too comfortable with one another’s styles. “Enough to beat you.”  
  
Bucky flopped onto his back. How could Amy still have energy? But she obviously did. She was still bouncing on the balls of her feet, eyes shining with anticipation.  
  
Steve squared off against Amy. Setting his shoulders with a playful smile. He had missed sparing with Amy. Especially since sparing normally ended with Amy’s arms around him. “Ready?”  
  
Amy kicked him in the left elbow before he could move.  
  
Steve hissed in discomfort and lunged for her. He wasn’t about to go easy on her. She wouldn’t appreciate it and he had someone else he needed to impress.  
  
Amy smirked and caught him on the hip this time.  
  
Bucky was enjoying the show. Amy fought like she was dancing, and it was clear who was leading. Steve might be faster and stronger, but she was kiting him around the space like it was nothing. It looked like her strategy was to wear him down with little hits, especially to his left side. Although that was probably because Steve was doing a terrible job defending his left side. The side he used to rely on his shield to protect.  
  
It really wasn’t fair. His little Fox tormenting his boy like that. Someone should do something.  
  
Bucky rolled onto his stomach. Waiting with a sniper’s patience for his opening.  
  
He didn’t have to wait long. Amy dodged away from Steve, and into Bucky’s reach. Bucky grabbed at her supporting ankle. Hand shooting out like a striking cobra.  
  
Amy lept over the snare. Landing on her back foot and pivoting.  
  
It was enough of a distraction for Steve to get his arms around Amy. He lifted her off her feet and spun her around until she squealed and surrendered.  
  
Bucky swept Steve’s feet dropping them both. Steve landed on his back with an oof as the wind rushed out of him. Amy twisted in the air landing on her hands and knees over him. Bucky tackled her from them from the side. Sending all three of them tumbling across the mats, ending in a messy pile of limbs and laughter.  
  
They sprawled out together. Steve in the middle, with Bucky and Amy on either side of him, their heads close together. Steve bumped his head against Amy’s temple affectionately. “I like sparing with you.”  
  
Amy fixed the lock of his hair that was falling across his forehead. “You’re still a disaster without your shield, and your boyfriend cheats.”  
  
“I’ll work on it.” Steve promised slipping his arm around her.  
  
Amy sighed and lay back, using Steve’s arm to help stretch out her shoulders. “If I was a good person, I would ask you to join me for my naginata practice.”  
  
Steve smiled and rolled her in against his side. “If I was a bad person, I’d take you up on the offer.”  
  
“Think you'll need a hand?” Bucky asked shoving his solitary appendage into Steve's hair.  
  
They all dissolved into laughter again. The sound shattering the pall of tension and unease that had been hanging over them for the last few weeks.  
  
Bucky kissed Steve’s temple. They had all needed this. His people needed to laugh more in general, but especially together. Together, Steve’s deep bass rumble and Amy’s bright bell sound were the most beautiful music he had ever heard. He could be happy listening to it all day. Although there were better things they could do with their mouths, he thought as Steve turned to kiss him. Amy slipped away, but that wasn’t the end of the world. She'd be back when she was ready. They just had to keep giving her opportunities. As long as they kept inviting her, she'd eventually figure out that they meant the invitation.  



	50. Tropical Vacation

Bucky closed his eyes and snuggled closer to Steve’s side. Across the room he could hear Amy talking on the phone. He didn’t know who was calling her, but her voice was light and calm so he could just enjoy having both of them in the same room. The tension had eased between the three of them lately, Amy wasn’t hiding as much. Staying in bed in the mornings. Grumbling sleepily about ungodly hours when Steve got up and letting Bucky, who personally agreed that Steve got up too early, snuggle her close. She was still coming to bed in the middle of the night, but Steve acted like that was her normal habit, so Bucky assumed that wasn’t her avoiding them as much as her relaxing and being herself.  
  
Afternoon had become Bucky’s favourite time of day. Steve was convinced that when he napped in the afternoon Bucky had fewer attacks. Bucky wasn’t entirely convinced, but since one or both of his people could usually be convinced to join him for said nap, he also wasn’t complaining. Any day he could fall asleep with Amy stroking his hair or Steve wrapped around him, was a good day.  
  
“Cuba? Well it isn’t at the top of my list, but if you’re information is good.” Amy drummed her fingers against her leg as she listened to the reply. “Yeah. I can be there tonight. No, no, I’ll just stick with your team.” She hung up with a long sigh and rolled her shoulders. This was good news. Even if she didn’t want to leave just now.  
  
“Who was that?” Steve asked, looking up from his book.  
  
Amy shoved her phone into her pocket and started mentally preparing a packing list. “Matt. Apparently Captain America and his band of fugitives are holed up in Holguin. The international task force is launching a strike and they want me there since I’m the world’s leading expert on the Winter Soldier.”  
  
Steve relaxed. Nothing to worry about then. She had to go, obviously. Joining in on the wild goose chase would reinforce her cover. But she wouldn’t be in any actual danger, not with her ‘enemies’ on the other side of the planet and her brother there to look after her. “I mean I worry about you going up against such a scary crew, but I know you can handle yourself. How long?”  
  
Amy considered. Travel time, briefing, debriefing, plus the actions itself... “Three, maybe four days.”  
  
Bucky caught her hand and kissed her fingertips. Too long and not long at all. At least they could be sure she wouldn't get herself into trouble. Not if all she was doing was chasing wild geese. “Take care of yourself baby girl.”  
  
“Back before you know it.” Amy squeezed his hand. She'd make sure to leave him a message, a little something to help him remember, this time. They would be alright. And maybe the people looking would stop trying so hard once they saw how futile their hunt was.  
  
Amy's eventual departure was delayed by several minutes, when Bucky pinned her to the wall and kissed her until he felt her pulse rate speed up. Then again for Steve's more sedate goodbye kiss. Feeling a little reckless from the flood of endorphins, Amy pecked them each on the lips as she finally slipped out the door.  
  
*****  
  
The lounge outside the briefing room was packed to the rafters. Dozens of operators from different branches of the US military. Amy recognised a good chunk of them, she even blew kisses to a few of her favourites. It was the maroon berets in the back corner that held most of her attention. A single squad of SAS tucked out of the way next to Matt's team. They all greeted her with warm calls of 'goddess' or invitations for the next time she was in the UK. Amy spared an especially warm smile for them. They were a very promising sign.  
  
The briefing room proper was just as packed as the room outside. All the seats at the table we’re taken, as were most of the spots along the wall. Amy made for a gap at the end of a sideboard. The perfect perch tucked between her older brother with his easy parade rest and the Captain of the SAS outside. Currently sitting on the narrow table with his own maroon hat pulled over his eyes. Amy couldn’t blame him the jet lag must be hell on him too.  
  
Amy hopped onto the sideboard. Jostling Brian in the process. He lifted his hat with one finger to check who it was, winked and replaced the shield against the florescent lights. Amy giggled at his cheek and pulled one knee up to her chest. “They dragged you into this?”  
  
“Takes a sniper to catch a sniper or some bullshit like that.” Brain said without bothering to lift his hat again.  
  
“Americans.” Amy scoffed in flawless queens English.  
  
Matt elbowed her in the ribs and nodded to the head of the table. The generals were standing ready to start reading everyone in.  
  
Amy didn’t even try to keep her expression neutral as they laid out their 'intelligence’. It was obvious they weren’t reading her reports. But had none of the people in charge even bothered to crack a book on Captain America and his tactics? They were acting like they were going after some midlevel drug runner with a few hired goons. Not the best strategist of the last two centuries and his diehard team of assassins. She had assumed this weekend was a bit of a joke, since none of the remaining Avengers were here. But she hadn’t even considered it was this bad.  
  
A few minutes into the actual plan Brian flipped up his hat and leaned forward, the same look of shock and horror on his face.  
  
One of the generals stopped in the middle of the explanation to stare at them. “Our consultants seem to have thoughts.”  
  
“Your plan is awful and is going to get your men killed.” Brian said without bothering to regulate his tone.  
  
Amy leaned back, crossing her arms over her chest. “Assuming they are even in there which I honestly see no evidence of.”  
  
“And what exactly do you suggest we do instead?” The general asked drumming his fingers on the table.  
  
Amy straightened her spine. They were paying her to consult and then just throwing away her work. It was an insult. One she would forgive if their intelligence was better than hers, but they were haring off after something that barely qualified as a wild goose. Nat had a safe house in Holguin, and that wasn’t even it. “Look in mainland Central America for one.”  
  
“Don’t corner them, for another.” Brian snorted. How stupid were these people? Maybe the teams they had assembled could take Steve and his group, but he didn’t like their odds if the Winter Soldier and the Black Widow decided they were trapped. It wouldn’t take much for it to turn into a blood bath. _He_ knew it was all an illusion, but they didn't.  
  
One of the other generals straightened his stack of papers with perfunctory taps. “We’ll take it under advisement.”  
  
Brian and Amy exchanged a look before settling back for the rest of the briefing. Amy wasn’t sure how she felt about this farce. On the one hand, it reassured her that Nat and the boys were safe. On the other, how were these people supposed to protect the world without Steve to hold their hands and walk them through everything.  
  
******  
  
Someone had shoved a cot into a broom closet. A broom closet with a leaking pipe in the wall based on the water stain growing near the ceiling. There was not airflow. She was pretty sure there was a mouse nest under the shelves in the corner. It would be a very interesting modern art piece, maybe titled ‘death of a dream' or something equally pretentious. If she saw it at a show, she would bid on it just to keep up appearances. But that didn’t explain why the corporal was showing it to her now. “What exactly is this?”  
  
The corporal cleared his throat nervously. No one liked being on the wrong end of the goddess disapproval. Rumour had it that it was very bad luck. And rumours about the goddess were true often enough that it wasn’t worth the risk. “We were informed you needed a room of your own.”  
  
Amy turned to Brian. Leaning against a wall shaking with silent laughter. He had known. That was why he had offered to walk with her. He had known they were going to try and shove her in a corner and had wanted to see her reaction. If this was what they thought constituted an acceptable ‘bedroom’ for her, it was no wonder he had wanted to tag along. “Where exactly are you staying tonight?”  
  
“The beach. They tried to stick us in with the cannon fod--“ Brain cleared his throat. “Sorry, enlisted infantry. We made other arrangements.”  
  
Amy took another look around the dingy space with its mouldy cot. “I think I’ll be bunking with you.”  
  
*****  
  
Brian and Amy retreated to the beach with a blanket and a six pack of cola. To outsiders it would look exactly the same as the relationship they had always had. They were in the same place. They were going off to fool around.  
  
Even when they had both been single, they hadn’t done that as often as people thought they had.  
  
“How’s London?” Amy asked cracking open her first bottle. The cola inside was too sweet. She should have brought her own whiskey. Dry bases were the worst.  
  
“Perfect.” Brian said opening one of his own. “I’m madly in love. Dane has a lovely student renting his garden suite, so Falsa isn’t stressed about it being empty anymore. Life is good.”  
  
The finished most of their drinks watching the moon rise on the water.  
  
“How is Africa?” Brian said eventually.  
  
Amy rubbed the back of her neck and wondered if she could get away with saying she didn’t want to talk about it. Probably not. Brian knew her well enough to call her out. “Complicated. The princess's best friend has a crush on me. But he also has a bodyguard that he has been in love with him with since they were children.”  
  
Brian raised an eyebrow. “Any chance the bodyguard also has a crush on you?”  
  
“He might.” Amy swirled the last of the syrupy brown liquid in her bottle. At least they couldn’t use names. Brian would see right through her laissez-faire attitude if he saw the way her eyes lit up when she said 'Steve' or 'Bucky'. She couldn’t help it. They made her happy, even when she was so irritated she wanted to skin them alive. Her failure to hide her emotions on the subject might be the most embarrassing part. She was better at her job than that. “But they just went through some stuff and I don’t want to mess up a good thing. You know my rule about people who are already in relationships.”  
  
“Ahh.” Brian downed the last of his soda and cracked another bottle. Love had always been Amy’s weak spot. Or at least it had been as long as he had known her. She thought she deserved the world when it came to everything except unconditional affection. “Do we need to have the you are valuable and worthy of love talk again?”  
  
“Three’s a crowd.” Amy shot back.  
  
“Parable time.” Brian took a long dink before leaning back on his elbows in the sand. “I once met these lovely old men at a party in Soho. They had been together since the fifties.”  
  
Amy rolled her eyes. She knew this one. “One of them was dying of cancer, they met a pretty young thing at a bar who looked after them for the rest of their lives. The end. Cute but not sure it’s relevant.”  
  
“All _three_ of them had been together since the fifties.” Brain corrected taking a smug sip. That she’d had that comeback ready meant she had been thinking about it. Just because she'd been the last to find them, didn't mean she was the least loved.  
  
“You’re saying I should give it a try.” Amy rubbed a hand through her hair. She knew there was precedence. She also knew that statistically it was going to lead to one or more of the participants resenting the situation. She didn’t want to hurt them, and she didn’t want to break her own heart either.  
  
“I’m saying you shouldn’t write off love just because it’s complicated. I didn’t.” He smiled at her reassuringly. Maybe it was because he was happy and in love, but he wanted to see the rest of the world in love too, Specifically Amy. She had been alone too long.  
  
Amy snorted lay back to watch the stars. Brian being in love wasn’t that complicated. Sam’s new identity would hold up to pretty much any background check. As long as they avoided people who had known Sam Wilson, they would be fine. They could spend the rest of their lives together without the world trying to come between them. “You’re a romantic.”  
  
Brian raised his bottle in an ironic salute. “You only act like you aren’t.”  
  
*****  
  
Brian lay face down in the second-best sniping position overlooking the 'safe house' one of the Rangers had tried to get him to take the best position, but he had rejected it. The best position also had an excellent position looking down on it from a high-rise 600 meters away. The Ranger had ended up listening and no one had taken that spot. There was nothing higher than this position, even if the sightlines were worse and the cross breeze off the water was erratic. Brian wasn’t about to be pegged by the Winter Soldier just because a shot was a little harder.  
  
As things stood, Amy lay next to him staring intently through a free-standing scope as she scanned the surrounding rooftops and windows for movement.  
  
His squad had this building and the ones on either side secure. His usual spotter was one floor down at the back of the building covering the street and roofs on that side. Chatter from the rest of the teams rattled through Brian’s head from his earpiece. If he really thought he was about to play duelling snipers with the best shot in a century he might have taken it out and trusted Ayame to fill him in on anything he needed to know. That was part of a spotter’s job. Deal with unnecessary distractions.  
  
The frequency went quiet. Someone counted down to the breach.  
  
“Front clear.” That was the marines.  
  
“Rear clear.” The Rangers.  
  
“Roof clear.” The SEALs.  
  
“Basement clear.” And the marines again as they cleared through the building.  
  
“There’s no one here.” Brian guessed that was one of the SEALs. They would have made the way from the roof all the way to basement by now.  
  
There was a pause while the team lead inspected the space. “...I don’t know that anyone has been here for a while.”  
  
Amy and Brian exchanged a long eye roll. No one ever listened to them.  
  
There was another twenty minuets of searching as the teams probed the walls and floors for hidden tunnels and inspected anything that could even potentially be a clue. That was probably a waste of time given that what they had raided was an Italian mob safe house with no connection to any of the Avengers. Amy rolled away from her scope for that. There was no point in her being uncomfortable while they looked for something that wasn’t there.  
  
*****  
  
The entire task force reconvened in the briefing room. The generals were on edge. The team that had gone in were anxious. Amy and Brian were making no secret of the fact they thought all of this was a waste of time. This time they had made a point of sitting at the table where they couldn’t be discounted. Both of them had their displeased nobility faces firmly in place. Brian had a chest full of metals. Amy had blood red lipstick and was walking a challenge coin around her fingers, one she had earned.  
  
If these people wanted to hare off after every willow of the wisp that could possibly resemble Captain America, that was their prerogative. But if they were going to be stupid about it and drag highly qualified professionals like Ayame and Brain into their mess, someone had to put a stop to that.  
  
“Anything else you two smartasses want to say?” One of the general growled glaring at them.  
  
“If you’re not going to read my reports, I’m not going to bother writing them anymore.” Amy said, her tone cold and imperious. She had invented the study of enhanced human warfare. She had written half of the textbooks and references these men taught or studied from, if any of the cared to check the contributors. When it came to Captain America and the Winter Soldier, her word should be gospel.  
  
Brain leaned back in his chair. He didn’t feel the need to deal with this kind of farce again. They could make do with snipers that weren’t quite as good. He would not be joining one of these taskforce missions again without direct orders from his own country’s military command. And certainly not at the drop of a hat. “I’m going to need at least three days’ notice next time you call us out for a wild goose chase. I have a live-in boyfriend to think about.”


	51. Murder on the Orient Express

If someone had asked Bucky, he would have told them he wasn’t exactly sure when he fell in love with Amy. He might even have told them that it was an overflow of his love of Steve that had caused it. He knew, deep down, that neither of those things was strictly true. Some of his love was because she loved Steve and some of it was how close she and Nat were. Most of his love was because of how wonderful his little Fox was all on her own. How kind, feirce, intelegent, and beautiful she was all the time. How soft she was with him and no one else. That blindly bright streak of mischief that she let show so infrequently. Just... everything... He also knew exactly when he had realised he was more than fond of her, even if he hadn't wanted to admit it.  
  
The moment she had stood between him and a Hyra kill squad bantering to give him time to recover. She hadn’t done that for Steve. She had done that for _him_. She could have just taken them out to protect him for Steve. Or taken him out like he had asked. Instead she had protected him until he could get control for himself.  
  
He had gotten used to having her to lean on when he was trying to figure out who he was now. And now she was gone. She had hardly left his side since he had woken up in Wakanda. The last time she had, she had comeback injured. And then fought with Steve badly enough that she had set new rules and hadn't come to bed with them. How was he supposed to look after her if she wasn’t with him?  
  
She would be back. Of course, she would be back. It wasn’t a dangerous mission. She had only been gone for five hours. He shouldn’t be this worried about her. He wasn’t this worried when Steve was away. He chewed his lip. When Steve was away, he was always with Nat. And Bucky could go to Amy and she could stop him from worrying.  
  
Steve wasn’t looking much better than he was. Sitting on the couch rolling a pen between his fingers. Bucky rolled over the back of the couch. Landing on his stomach with his face in Steve’s lap. “I don’t like when any of you go off on your own. We should use the buddy system.”  
  
“You seem stressed. Why don’t we take a nap?” Steve rubbed Bucky’s back reassuringly. He was worried about her too. But she was more than fine. She would be with her brother. The whole thing was a wild goose chase. She would fly to Cuba, sit on a beach for a while, eat some fresh food cooked by someone else, then fly home. Nothing was going to happen to her in that time.  
  
Neither of them had been into the bedroom since Amy had left. Steve had been actively avoiding thinking about how they were going to sleep without her tonight. Sitting in the centre of the bedspread was a package wrapped in a blue and white cloth. Steve felt his breath catch. His sweet girl. Even leaving in a rush like she had, she had thought of them.  
  
“What is it?” Bucky asked pressing against Steve’s back.  
  
“Something from Amy I think.” He said picking up the package. Steve almost laughed when he folded back the fabric. A copy of _Murder on the Orient Express_.  
  
The note tucked in the front cover was addressed to JBB. He passed it over his shoulder to Bucky and opened the book. He found Amy’s crest stamped neatly on the flyleaf, no additional inscription, just the neat black circle with an iris curled inside. “What does the note say?”  
  
“He still doesn’t know how it ends. See if you can fix that…If you don’t get distracted by his eyes.” Bucky reached around Steve to trace the title. “I don’t know how it ends either. I always stopped reading when you fell asleep and then you’d ask me to start over.”  
  
*****  
  
“We are never going to finish this book if you keep doing this.” Bucky sighed, leaning into Steve’s mouth as he kissed and nipped at his neck.  
  
“s’not my fault. ‘ow am I s’pose to keep my ‘ands off you with you looking all intellectual and shit.” Steve dropped into the Brooklyn accent of their childhood with out thinking. His hands roamed higher over Bucky’s chest. It wasn’t the book. Okay, it wasn’t just the book. Bucky reading _Murder on the Orient Express_ had brought back all sort of feelings. How on earth had he not realised he was in love with Bucky?  
  
“If holding a book is all it takes for you to think a guy looks intellectual it’s a miracle anyone is allowed to keep their shirt on around you.”  
  
“Not many people pull intellectual off as well as you do.”  
  
“Yeah?” Bucky raised his eyebrows questioningly and nipped at Steve’s lips. They hadn’t really fooled around since Shuri had fixed the nick in his brainstem. Turned out it was an easy fix once she knew what she was looking at. He hadn’t had a seizure since, and he’d gotten a lot better about keeping track of time. There was every reason to believe this would go wonderfully, or as wonderfully as it could without their girl. Which years of fantasies reminded him was pretty damn wonderfully.  
  
Steve kissed him back. “Yeah.”  
  
Bucky rolled them over, so he was on top. “Do you, know how long I’ve loved you?”  
  
Steve grabbed Bucky’s hips and crushed them onto his. “How long?”  
  
“For-fucking-ever.” Bucky growled grinding down on Steve at the same time he kissed Steve’s jugular. Steve was already half hard and Bucky was right behind him. Bucky found Steve’s mouth again, devouring him.  
  
Making out like teenagers was fun. But they hadn’t been teenagers for a very long time, and even when they had been Bucky hadn’t been one to take things slow. Give him a willing and excited partner, somewhere reasonably private, and no interruptions, he could get them both where they needed to go.  
  
Steve was panting and rubbing against him, desperate for friction. They were alone in their own bedroom, which was a damn sight better than some of the places Bucky had fool around, there was no danger of getting sand in delicate placed for a start. The only person would interrupt them, if it wasn’t an absolute emergency, was Amy, and she was welcome to join them. They even had a box of condoms and a bottle of lube. They could have damn good sex as long as Bucky could keep himself together.  
  
Bucky broke off the kiss. Biting Steve’s lower lip in the process. “Why are we still wearing pants?”  
  
“No idea.” Steve panted breathlessly.  
  
They both scrambled to peel off their clothes. Alternating between pulling of shirts and pants and kissing newly exposed flesh.  
  
Steve paid extra attention to the skin around Bucky’s shoulder. Gently kissing the sensitive skin between the scars. They were proof that Bucky had survived. That this wasn’t a figment of Steve’s imagination. Against all odds this was their real life.  
  
Bucky racked his fingernails down Steve’s abs to the dark gold curls and heavy erection. His own penis bumped against Steve’s hip. He whimpered as Steve rubbed a palm over his nipple. He’d always loved being touched like that. Which Steve knew, because Steve knew him better than he knew himself. Bucky grabbed Steve’s other hand and wrapped it around them. His hand was big, and warm. So warm. Things that hurt were never warm. It also meant he could have his hand on the back of Steve’s neck, holding him close.  
  
“Is this good?” Steve asked, staring at the way the two cocks looked together in his hand. He couldn’t think of anything sexier right now. In fact, he was having a hard time think of anything else at all. He hadn’t even moved his hand yet and already the feel of Bucky against him was driving him crazy.  
  
“So fucking good.” Bucky moaned as Steve started to move his hand. “Fuck Steve baby. I can’t wait to fuck you. I’m going to make you scream my name.”  
  
Steve bit his lip. If Bucky kept talking like that he was going to finish before they got to that. Not that he would let that slow them down. He would be hard again by the time he was prepped. The serum had been a blessing on that front.  
  
Bucky ran his hand down to Steve’s ass and squeezed. “Shit, look at you baby. You’re thinking about it right now, aren’t you? You’re thinking about how good I’m going to feel inside you.”  
  
Steve kissed Bucky viciously. “You have a fucking filthy mouth.”  
  
“Yeah.” Bucky grinned evilly and kissed Steve again. He didn’t want to jinx them, but this was the best this had ever gone without Amy with them. “You gonna get your ass ready and ride me or not?”  
  
“I'll have to stop stoking us.” Steve warned playfully. He didn’t want to stop. He did want Bucky inside him.  
  
Bucky groaned and tipped his head back. “Worth it if it means I get to fuck you properly.”  
  
That sounded right. Steve rushed through prepping himself. It might make the next part sting a little, but he wanted Bucky more than he wanted to take his time. Bucky lay on his back watching him the entire time. Lazily stroking himself and licking his lips.  
  
Ready enough, Steve helped Bucky roll on a condom and braced himself over him. “I need you inside me.”  
  
Slowly, with the slight burn he had anticipated, Steve lowered himself onto Bucky.  
  
A tiny seed of panic blossomed in Bucky’s chest at the pressure. “Don’t stop talking. It helps.”  
  
Talking wasn’t the easiest proposition for Steve. Not with his mind so very distracted by the glorious burn and stretch of Bucky halfway into him. If that was what Bucky needed right now, he would find a way. Hell, if Bucky asked him to do a backflip right now, he would find a way He licked his lips and managed to form a few words. “You’re so big.”  
  
“Yeah?” Bucky grunted, pushing a little farther up.  
  
Steve groaned. That was what he’d needed, he was so full, and Bucky was pressing against all the right places. “I want you inside me all the time.”  
  
“Fuck. Stevie. I’ve wanted to fuck you for so long.” He wrapped his hand around Steve’s knee, rocking slowly up.  
  
Now that the talking had started, Steve didn’t think he could stop. Words flowed out of his as he slowly sped up. “God damn. I used to think about what you and your date were doing when you came home late. I’d think about you fucking her up against some wall in a back alley and I’d touch myself. I probably should have known it wasn’t whatever girl you were going with that week that did it for me.”  
  
“Fuck baby. You were gone for me and you didn’t even know. Show me. Wrap your hand around that dick and show me how you played with yourself when you think about me.”  
  
Steve wrapped his had around his shaft and stroked himself. Buck's grey eyes setting his skin on fire with the intensity of his gaze. All of his senses were heightened. He could hear their ragged breathing. Feel the heat radiating of Bucky’s skin. Could almost taste the salty sweat coating Bucky’s chest.  
  
“Fuck.” Bucky moaned. His orgasm throbbing deep inside Steve.  
  
Steve groaned. He could feel Bucky pumping out inside him. It felt better than anything ever had. He stroked his fist along his shaft one last time and thick sticky liquid squirted over his hand.  
  
Bucky grabbed Steve’s hand and pulled it to his face. He licked a drop off one of Steve’s fingers. Sweet. Salty. Steve. He purred and licked more of the mess off Steve’s hand. Almost as good as when it had been all over Amy. Almost.  
  
Steve rocked forwards on his knees. Gasping at the shock of cold air as Bucky slipped out of him. He rolled off of Bucky landing heavily on his side. It took him a minute to catch his breath and for coherent thought to return. He rolled over to look at Bucky. It was hard to say how his boy was doing. Bucky was laying on his back with his arm over his eyes, from here it made it impossible to read his expression. Given how every other time they had fooled around had gone, that didn’t comfort Steve. “You doin' alright Buck.”  
  
Bucker threw his arm to the side and wrapped it around Steve’s head. “I’m fucking great. Shit, I knew you would look good riding me.” He did feel great. They had made it all the way through sex. Just the two of them. They’d managed it once that meant they could do it again. And again. And again. Preferably every day for the rest of their lives.  
  
Steve laughed and shoved him playfully. “You’re the worst.”  
  
“Fuck you. You love me.” Bucky shoved him back grinning.  
  
“God help me. I do.” Steve kissed Bucky, drinking in the taste he hadn’t known he wanted or needed but was sure he wouldn’t be able to live without from now on. “I should get us a towel. Amy always insists we clean up before we cuddle.”  
  
Bucky pulled Steve’s head onto his chest. “Lay with me for a bit. We can shower after.”  
  
Steve had to admit he did want to cuddle. He wanted to wrap himself around Bucky and have Bucky cling right back. He got that Amy didn’t like to feel sticky, but sometimes he just wanted to spend a little time laying still and holding the person he had just slept with. He tangled his legs with Bucky’s, holding him close.  
  
Bucky ran his hand through Steve’s hair. It was the little things that still amazed him the most. He was allowed these little tender moments. Even when they weren’t locked in their rooms. He could hold Steve’s hand or lean against him, even kiss him, and no one would bat an eye. Steve sighed and arched into the caress, make Bucky’s heat swell with love. “What are you thinking, _Mon Ours_?”  
  
That was a good question. He mostly hadn’t been thinking. Just enjoying the sensation of being held. “This part is different with you.”  
  
“Good different or bad different?” Bucky asked tracing the curve of Steve’s ear.  
  
“Just different.” Steve ran his fingers over Bucky’s chest. “Amy is softer. You’re warmer.”  
  
Bucky had to agree. Amy was amazingly soft, but the girl was always cool to the touch. That had only answered half of his question. Amy wasn’t the only love of Steve’s life. “And Peggy?”  
  
“You of all people know I never really got to have this with Peggy.” Steve snorted.  
  
“Hey Steve?” Bucky cupped the side of Steve’s face and tipped it towards him. “I love you.”  
  
Steve pushed up just enough to press his lips against Bucky’s. “I love you too.”  
  
They lapsed back into silence. Bucky tracing the muscles of Steve’s back. Steve half asleep enjoying the sensation and the sound of Bucky's heart beating under his head. This was an almost perfect moment as far as Steve was concerned. He was a little cold, but he didn’t want to move to pull the blanket over them.  
  
His mind flashed him a vision of Amy’s face inches from his own. Her head on the other side of Bucky’s chest. He could almost feel her cool hand tucked under his on Bucky's stomach. The soft skin of her leg tangled with theirs.  
  
He pushed the vision away. This was as perfect as he could hope for. He had his Bucky. He couldn’t ask for more…. Besides Amy had been clear about not having sex with them again.  
  
Bucky closed his eyes and let his mind drift. Amy was going to be so proud. And once she knew they didn’t just want her in bed for her powers maybe they could coax her back into fooling around with them. Bucky drifted off with dreams of Amy laughing and straddling his hips while Steve kissed him.  
  
*****  
  
Steve woke up still tangled with Bucky. Sun was streaming through the window casting the angles of Bucky’s face in a warm glow. There was a reason Steve’s teacher’s at art college had expounded on the virtues of golden hour. And none of them had seen the perfection that was Bucky Barnes in the morning light. Those cheekbones should be chiselled out of marble. “Morning handsome.”  
  
“Morning.” Bucky mumbled cuddling closer to Steve’s gloriously naked form. They should wake up like this more often.  
  
“Want to read some more?” Steve asked running a hand through Bucky’s hair.  
  
Bucky grinned wickedly at him. “I think I’m going to associate Istanbul with your mouth for the rest of my life.”  
  
Steve found that grin a little overwhelming. His blood couldn’t decide where it wanted to be, rushing from his cheeks to his groin and back again. He knew where he wanted his hands to be, at least in a general sense. He wanted them all over Bucky. “…Fool around some more and watch the movie so Amy doesn’t think we’re complete ingrates.”  
  
“Has anyone ever told you that you’re a genius?” Bucky growled kissing his way down Steve’s chest.  
  
“Yeah, but normally they aren’t actively going down on me.” Steve chuckled curling a hand into Bucky’s hair.  
  
A knock interrupted before they could get any further.  
  
Natasha gave them a full 30 seconds to extract themselves from any compromising positions before she let herself in. “If you two could stop making out for five minuets, we have a small emergency.”  
  
Steve and Bucky rested casually against the pillows. Doing their best impression of innocent lambs as Steve held their place in the book. The illusion was slightly undermined by the fact the sheets were still rumpled around their waists, but Natasha appreciated the effort.  
  
Steve took the file she handed him and flipped through it quickly. Ten Rings again. “Does she get her talent for understatement from you?”  
  
“She comes by it naturally.” Bucky smiled warmly at his little girl. She looked so serious and composed. Always a professional, but such a loyal friend and fierce protector.  
  
“I’ve got to go.” Steve said pulling on his underwear. If they hurried it would only take them a few days to locate the weapons stash and neutralise it. “Are you going to be alright on you own?”  
  
“I’ll be fine.” Bucky smiled and leaned back into the pillows. It was going to be a good day, even without Steve. “You don’t have to worry about me all the time.”  
  
Steve curled his hand around the back of Bucky’s head and pulled him into a long goodbye kiss. “Yeah I do.”


	52. A Productive Job For Bucky

Bucky was not alright. He spent the three days between Steve and Natasha’s departure and Amy’s return pacing around the suite restlessly. Desperately trying to find something to distract him from worrying about all of them. He visited Suri in her lab. He watched the Dora train and even offered some advice. He carried his black Fairbairn-Skyes dagger with him everywhere he went and practiced rolling and flipping it around his fingers as a form of meditation. Nothing stopped his mind from spiralling back to the worst-case scenario of what could be happening to the people he loved.  
  
_Murder on the Orient Express_ ended up buried in a bedside table drawer. He couldn’t face the sight of it. They hadn’t finished it and he wouldn’t without Steve.  
  
He woke the fourth morning to find Amy sitting at the breakfast table, still wearing her heavy navy gi jacket, but not showing any outward signs of injury. He felt his heart unclench a fraction. One of them was alive at least.  
  
Bucky sat down heavily. Amy poured him a coffee without looking up from her screen. He curled his hand around the warm ceramic. It was so normal. So domestic. So comforting.  
  
“I can’t do this.” Bucky was shocked at his own words. He hadn’t planned on just blurting it out like that. He couldn’t though. He couldn’t just sit around and wait for them to not come back.  
  
Amy turned off her screen nodding. She was careful to keep her expression smooth and serine. Of course, he would have had time to get used to being with just Steve, he would have realised that her presence was a needless complication. Who would want to share the love of their life with someone else? “Okay. When Steve gets back, I'll explain that I’ve been called back to Japan. That way if he is upset at all he'll blame me. The two of you will have an easier time of it without me here. And Shuri is making progress on how to deal with the things in your brain. You shouldn’t need me to keep you stable.”  
  
“That’s not what I mean.” Bucky cupped her chin and made her look at him. She was not allowed to run away from them. Her leaving willingly would be worse than losing her to her work. If she decided she wanted to leave, that would be one thing. One painful, gut wrenching, thing. But for her to leave because she thought they didn't want her, _he_ didn't want her. Just the thought was intolerable. He stared deep into her flawless violet eyes, trying to say with the intensity of his gaze, what he wasn't ready to say out loud. “That will never be what I mean.”  
  
He dropped his hand from her face. Lacing their fingers together instead. “I can’t handle being alone here with nothing. You all have jobs to do, and I would never ask any of you to stop, but I can’t just sit around and wonder if you’re going to come back or not. I need something to do. I don’t know if I’m stable enough. But I need something.”  
  
Amy frowned. Did he want to go into the field with them? He knew what a risk that was. The archives had been one thing, a calculated decision. Regular work was entirely different. “What sort of thing do you want to do?”  
  
Bucky rested his head on the table. He wanted to be useful. He didn’t want to kill people anymore. “Something peaceful. Something productive. Preferably something that leaves me too tired to worry about any of you.”  
  
Amy rubbed his arm. They could figure it out. She would help him. “I don’t have any ideas. Why don’t we ask Shuri? She always has something up her sleeve.”  
  
*****  
  
Shuri did have ideas, and her mother had better ones. Simple, productive, preferably outdoor. The answer was simple, even if it wasn’t something Amy would have thought of left to her own devices. The royals were giving Bucky a farm. An abandoned scrap of land on the outskirts of the city, it was an easy walk to and from the palace.  
  
A hut and some arable land tucked between the road and a smooth lake. A large tree sheltered the space in front of the hut. Chickens pecked at the dirt. In the Field behind the hut goats belated and gambled. A flock of children flitted around the open area. Laughing and shrieking as they played.  
  
It was all very idyllic and peaceful. Amy would be miserable if she had to spend any length of time here. This wasn’t about her. This was about Bucky, and Bucky didn’t seem to have the same reservations. He poked around, eyes smiling, posture relaxed.  
  
Amy picked her way delicately around a patch of mud to him. “What are you thinking, Bucky baby?”  
  
“What all would I have to do?” Bucky asked prodding a piece of farm equipment he didn’t recognise. Not that he had any reason to recognise it. He’s always been a city boy. He would just have to learn.  
  
Shuri picked up a chicken that had decided it liked her. “Look after the animals. Clean up some of the brush that is taking over. Maybe replant the garden if that goes well.” A pair of children pushed by her deeply engrossed in a game of tag. “Put up with the wildlife.”  
  
Bucky nodded and ducked his head into the hut. A narrow cot and small chest for belongings. Simple, a little run down, but cosy. “And this would be mine.”  
  
“All yours.” Shuri said letting the chicken flutter to the ground.  
  
“I love it.” Bucky wrapped his arm around Amy’s waist and spun her around. “What do you think?”  
  
Amy thought that the goat on the left had been eyeing her since they had arrived and that if she stayed much longer there was a very real chance it would charge her. That wasn’t what Bucky wanted or needed to hear just now. “I think if it makes you happy you should do it.”  
  
“You heard the lady, princess. We'll take it.” Bucky beamed. He had a farm.  
  
“Should we sleep down here tonight?” Bucky asked dancing her in another half circle. “I’ll carry you over the threshold.”  
  
Amy shrugged out of his hold. Letting Bucky literally sweep her off her feet was definitely a bad idea. “You can sleep wherever you want. I have a perfectly good bed. Two if you want to be pedantic.”  
  
“You’re no fun.” Bucky mock grumbled slipping his hand into hers. They could sleep where she wanted. As long as they got to sleep together. This had been a great idea. He felt less unmoored already.  
  
“Has anyone told you that you guys are adorable together?” Shuri said trying and failing to not laugh at their flirting.  
  
“We would have to be together for anyone to tell us that.” Amy said drily. She was hoping that everyone would just ignore the way Bucky was stroking the back of her hand with his thumb and completely undermining her point.  
  
Bucky kept Amy’s hand in his, towing her around as they did a more thorough tour. Bucky asking detailed questions. Shuri pointing out important features. At the end of an hour a plan for Bucky’s agricultural education was firmly in place and Shuri left them to their own devices.  
  
“What should we do first?” Bucky asked finally letting go of Amy’s hand so he could inspect some more of the farm’s hardware.  
  
“Hire a full staff who know what they’re doing.” Amy muttered. She had been raised a princess. This whole thing was a little too _le Petit Trianon_ for her to feel comfortable. Plus, that goat was definitely thinking about attacking her. Give her a Bengali shantytown over a farm any day, at least she knew what to do there.  
  
“What was that, baby girl?” Bucky asked fiddling with the pump handle. Water was important everywhere. It had to be important here. The pump seemed fine. It was just a standard piston. A little grease. Tighten up the loose nut on the handle. It would be good as new.  
  
Amy sighed. He looked so happy and enthusiastic. She hadn’t seen that look for anything in the time they’d been living together. Even his enthusiasm for kissing Steve was tempered by the fear that he would lose control and hurt Steve. This was something he was uncomplicatedly happy about. She would move heaven and earth to keep it that way. Which meant she was going to have to get on board with farming plans. This was going to require research. Better start small. “The thatching. You’re going to need somewhere to nap when you get tired and that roof doesn’t look secure.”  
  
*****  
  
Steve needed a shower. He had spent several hours wading through a mangrove swamp and the silt was everywhere. Changing clothes hadn’t helped. The quick rinse he had grabbed at the safe house had gotten most of the surface grit off, but everything still felt scratchy when he moved. He dropped his gear in Amy’s bedroom-come-armoury and made for the bathroom.  
  
The tiles were instantly comforting under his feet. Steam wafted around the room, gently perfumed with cedar and soap. Most reassuringly of all, Bucky and Amy were there. Bucky sitting on the little plastic stool, Amy kneeling behind him, hands buried in his soapy hair. He had a little towel draped across his lap. She was wrapped from neck to knee in a thick bath sheet.  
  
Amy murmured something Steve couldn’t hear, but that made Bucky smile at her. She drifted way from him to rummage in a cupboard.  
  
Steve hung his towel on a hook and wandered over to lean against the wall next to Bucky. “You know, we could always cut your hair short, so you don’t need help washing it.”  
  
Bucky indulged in a long lingering scan of Steve’s body. He was back, and he looked perfectly intact. Perfectly a lot of things. He grinned at Steve’s blush. This communal bathing thing was great. Amy was a genius for instituting it. “And miss out on a half naked Amy massaging my scalp twice a week? No thank you. Don’t tell her, but I can manage on my own if I have to. I did alright before you found me.”  
  
Steve laughed and cupped the back of Bucky’s neck affectionately.  
  
“You’ll get shampoo all over yourself if you do that.” Amy had returned with an arm full of bottles.  
  
“I’m here for a shower of my own anyway.” Steve smiled up at her. Maybe if he asked nicely, she would wash his hair too. Or his back. He would even accept her just sitting with him in the hot tub.  
  
“Well then you will need some soap.” Amy handed him the bar she was carrying and passed Bucky the bottle of conditioner. “Are you going to rinse or just sit there and gawk at naked Steve?”  
  
Bucky batted his eyelashes playfully. “You don’t want to gawk at naked Steve?”  
  
Amy sighed and started rinsing his hair for him. Bucky leaned into the touch feeling and let out a low moan of pleasure. Amy flicked the back of his ear and grumbled about him being a shameless flirt.  
  
Steve couldn’t stop stealing looks at them.  
  
Bucky caught Steve watching him and grinned all over again. “You know, what’s odd?”  
  
“What?” Steve asked lathering the soap over his chest. Bucky was hopeless. Whatever he was about to say, it was definitely going to embrace Steve. It would probably make Amy blush too. Then she would splash them and make an excuse to leave.  
  
Bucky licked his lips. “There are three people in this room. All in a state of undress. All of whom want to kiss everyone else in the room. And yet no one is kissing.”  
  
“You are welcome to. I’m going to take a soak.” Amy twisted her hair into a neat knot on the top of her head as she walked away from them.  
  
Steve sighed and watched her slim legs disappeared into the second room. “Do you think she has any idea what she does to people.”  
  
Bucky leaned over and kissed the side of his neck. “Do you?”  
  
Steve closed his eyes as Bucky nibbled from his ear to the point of his shoulder. Bucky tangled their fingers together and pulled Steve against his chest. “I don’t know what I’d do without either of you.”  
  
Steve rested his head on Bucky’s shoulder. “I love you Buck.”  
  
“I love you too, Stevie.” He combed a hand through Steve’s wet hair. “Let’s go soak. She’s stubborn and scared, but I think she’ll come around.”  
  
Steve kissed Bucky again and made a face. “You taste like conditioner.”  
  
Bucky laughed and wrapped Steve’s arm around him as he stood. Steve stayed draped around him as they tripped towards the steaming tub.  
  
“So why the mid day shower?” Steve asked leaning back in the warm water.  
  
“Slipped in the goat pen. Mud everywhere.” Bucky laughed.  
  
“Goat pen?” Steve stopped halfway through splashing water on his neck.  
  
“I needed something to do.” Bucky shrugged. Steve would understand that days of inactivity left him too much time to think. “Shuri found me a farm.”  
  
That made sense. Steve went back to cleaning himself. Bucky had always hated sitting still. They should have thought about finding him a job to keep him occupied ages ago. “A farm with goats?”  
  
“And chickens, and if I can get the ground cleared a kitchen garden, so we always have fresh vegetables. Hard to say how that will work. It’s only been three days. But we're hopeful. Right, baby girl?”  
  
Amy closed her eyes and tipped her head towards the ceiling. "Hector the goat wants to kill me. But yeah, I'm looking forward to fresh salad."  
  
Steve considered both of them carefully. He understood Amy's reticence. A farm was definitely not her native habitat. Bucky enthusiasm was something of a surprise. Bucky had always like the outdoors, sure, but he had also been born very much a city boy. Still, if it made him as happy as it looked like it did...“You like it?”  
  
“I love it.” Bucky buried a hand in Steve’s wet hair with a grin. He had a reason to get out of bed in the morning now. Not a big ‘purpose in life’ reason. A nitty gritty ‘I have to get up or there will be consequences’ reason. He had something to do everyday.  
  
They did manage to soak with Amy. At least for awhile. She left when they started kissing.  
  
*****  
  
Kissing lead to more than kissing. They were far to busy to talk more for the next few hours. Eventually exhausted and in need of another shower, they collapsed against the pillows together. Bucky pulled Steve’s head onto his chest. Eyes closed he combed his fingers through Steve’s hair. “How did it go?”  
  
Steve sighed. He wished he could say that everything had gone well, and he was back to stay for a while. He couldn’t lie to Bucky. “Not great. We missed them. Nat is working on a new location, I’ll have to go back out soon. You’ll be okay?”  
  
Bucky bumped his forehead against Steve’s. There would always be another reason to go out. There were still bad people in the world and his guy was still going to feel the need to stop them. The war had never really ended. Just changed. “I’m not the one chasing down a major arms deal bud. I have Amy and now the goats.”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky fell into the routine of going down to the farm readily over the next few days. He started getting up earlier, smiling more, he fell asleep right away when he came back for his nap in the afternoon. If he came back for his nap, there was a hut on the farm and sleeping there when he was in the middle of a project just made sense.  
  
He loved it. He also loved coming home to his people. Which he had everyday this week, twice most days, once for lunch and a nap, and again at the end of the day. The domestic bliss of Steve and Amy looking up from their work and welcoming him home would have made the farm worth it all on its own. It made him feel warm and loved all over. It also opened up a world of opportunities when it came to teasing them.  
  
“That is another shirt lost to the goats.” Bucky peeled off the offending garment and tossed it towards the bedroom hallway. “I don’t know what it is, they never seem to eat my clothes when a wear a sarong but the second the see a tee-shirt they are absolutely ravenous. I only have two left.” Bucky poured a glass of water from the jug and chugged it. He poured a second glass full over his head with a relaxed sigh before grinning at the room’s other occupants.  
  
Amy flicked her eyes up from her computer. Dropping them again immediately when they landed on his wet and glistening abs. Bucky running out of shirts would be a problem. If he ran out of shirts, he would start stealing Steve’s. And if the goats destroyed all of Steve’s shirts, then they would both start walking around shirtless, and then she’d never get anything done. “I will make sure to have Dai included some in my next care package. Put something else on for now. You’re making it hard for Steve to concentrate.”  
  
Bucky stretched, which earned him another little flick of her eyes as she tracked the motion. It was subtle, but if you knew where to look, she gave off dozens of little clues that she wanted more with him, and with Steve. “Steve is fine. If anyone is distracted it is you.”  
  
Amy snorted. She was only a little distracted. “Steve is not fine. That is his 'I need to put my mouth on that as soon as possible' face.”  
  
“Is it?” Bucky met Steve’s eyes and licked his lips. She was right. Steve was completely frozen, his pen a few inches above the table. Bucky leaned over the back of the couch and ran a finger down the back of Amy’s neck. “Think if we make out a little, we can turn it into his 'I need to fuck that as soon as possible' face?”  
  
Amy batted his hand away. She really couldn’t stay irritated at him. Struggle even to feel even feel irritated in the first place. “Keep flirting with me like that and your boyfriend will get the wrong idea about our relationship.”  
  
“And here I am hoping someone else will get the right one.” Bucky purred low in his throat. He stopped just short of kissing her behind the ear. She was trying to work, and he respected that. He peaked over her shoulder to see what exactly she was working on. His eyes settled on the plate next to her. Dry toast. Untouched dry toast. “Are you not eating?”  
  
Amy waved away his concern. “My stomach is bugging me again. I’m sure I'll feel better by dinner.”  
  
“I’m sorry, baby girl. I shouldn’t make you use your power so much.” Bucky rubbed her cheek. She gave so much of herself to them. It was selfish to want the part she was holding back. But he did.  
  
Amy smiled up at him. “I’d rather you get some rest. I don’t usually eat breakfast anyway. I only have toast right now because _someone_ is a mother hen.” She rolled her eyes at Steve’s back, making Bucky smile too.  
  
Steve swivelled to face them. “I am a mother hen.” He pointed at Bucky. “Your lunch is on the table. You can flirt with Amy after you eat.”  
  
Bucky ran a finger down Amy’s neck. Mouth close to her ear he whispered. “To be continued.” She would see reason soon enough, they just had to keep working at her. And if that meant he had to spend all his free time flirting with a beautiful girl? Well that was the kind of mission he was more than willing to accept.


	53. Not Exercising Alone

Steve tried to focus on the page he was holding, but the words kept blurring in front of his eyes. Even after a long day, he was restless. It had been a rough couple of weeks. Last night was the first time all three of them had slept through the night in almost ten days. Steve wanted to blame the extra stress of Bucky trying to run a farm, but having to feed the goats and chickens was the only thing getting him out of bed most mornings, so it was hard to feel too resentful.  
  
Bucky had been having detailed flashbacks of the things Hydra had made him do. On Tuesday he'd been halfway out of bed before Amy woke up enough to wake _him_ up. They had spent the next few hours cuddling while Bucky quietly explained what had happened, Amy reassured him that they knew what he had done and didn’t care, that he was still worthy of their affection, and Steve held them both.  
  
Steve had had the falling nightmare twice and the one where Tony failed to stop the bomb in New York once. That one had a fun new twist with Bucky and Amy running towards him away from the blast holding hands, he didn’t normally see specific people in that one. Bucky had been the one to hold Steve after his nightmares. Stroking the back of his neck and humming in a soft soothing way. They could have woken Amy up and let her use her power, but she’d been so sick the morning before, Steve didn’t want to strain her.  
  
Amy’s nightmare on Wednesday had been bad. Steve hadn’t seen anything like it since she’d gotten out of the hospital almost two years ago. She had woken up screaming and pleading for someone, Steve suspected Jun'ichi but hadn’t wanted to ask, to stop hurting her, that she would kill 'them', she could do it, if they would just stop hurting her. Steve hadn’t been able to tell if Amy was the one being tortured in her dream or if she was watching someone else and hadn’t been able to help. It had been an hour before they had gotten the shaking to stop.  
  
Then of course Amy’s nightmare had triggered and break in Bucky and none of them had gotten any more sleep for the rest of the night. Or the next night.  
  
Today, Sunday, looked like they were turning a corner. Last night they had finally all made it through a solid eight hours. They were all still a little ragged around the edges, but it was better. A sense of normalcy was returning. Bucky had gone down to the farm with a spring in his step. Steve had gone for his morning run. Things had started to relax again. Bucky had teased Amy all through lunch. All three of them had taken an afternoon nap. Which for Steve and Bucky’s part consisted largely of lazy kisses, and for Amy had been a good half hour with her dead to the world followed by waking up refreshed and smiling. And laughing so hard she nearly fell out of bed when Steve had looked guilty about the fact his shirt was now inside out. Bucky had scooped her into his lap to save her and offered to show her how he had managed it one handed.  
  
Now Steve was reading through the report on South America Nat had sent him, while Bucky had a lazy after dinner doze on top of him. Bucky’s hair was pulled back and the little tail of fluff kept brushing Steve’s chin when he moved. It was good. Peaceful. Less peaceful was the way Amy was fretting in the door to the room.  
  
Amy smoothed the folds of her wrapped workout shirt. This was a bad idea. She didn’t need company. And they looked so sweet together. Steve rubbing Bucky’s back. Bucky making soft contented noises. They belonged like this. Together. Relaxed and happy. She belonged… She belonged doing what she should be doing right now instead of agonising over whether she needed someone to hold her hand or not, keeping herself at her peak so she was ready when her empire or the people she cared about needed her.  
  
Steve looked up at her expectantly. Amy definitely wanted something, but she seemed nervous about asking. “Aims?”  
  
Amy closed and unclosed her hand by her left hip, exactly where her sword would be if she were armed. “Do you… do you want to go for a run with me?”  
  
“A run?” Bucky made a face. He was comfortable. A run would mean getting changed and more importantly, not laying on-top of Steve anymore. He would end up hot and sweaty, and for what? If Amy wanted to spend time with them, she could come cuddle with them. He would even put up with her working while she did. “Steve already went out this morning why would we –“  
  
Steve grabbed Bucky’s head and shoved it into a pillow. “Ignore him. We would love to. Just give us a sec to get changed. Even if this one decides he's too much of a layabout get some exercise, I'll come with you.”  
  
Amy opened her mouth to say something else but decided against it. Instead she just nodded and stepped out onto the balcony. Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth. She wanted company on her run. Now she had it.  
  
Bucky extracted himself from the pillow. Hair sticking up at odd angles. “What the hell? What if I don’t want to go running? I spent two hours cleaning up after goats this morning, not to mention fighting with one very angry chicken.”  
  
“What if I told you this is Aims testing the waters to see if we want to fool around?” Steve asked pulling Bucky to his feet.  
  
“How do you get sex from ‘do you want to go for a run’?” Bucky asked fallowing Steve towards the bedroom.  
  
Steve shrugged. Memories of Katsura, a smiling Amy in his arms, and the feel of sunlight on his naked back, filing his mind. “That’s how runs with Amy usually end.”  
  
Bucky sat on the edge of the bed. Watching as Steve dug out a pair of light shoes for each of them and two pairs of sweatpants. “You really think Amy wants to have sex again?”  
  
Steve sighed and leaned against the dresser. It wasn’t quite that simple. He didn’t think Amy had made up her mind, at least not consciously. “I think our girl is sexually frustrated, in bed with us all the time, watching us kiss but not letting herself join in, getting kissed by a certain incorrigible flirt.”  
  
Bucky smirked and stripped out of the tank top he was wearing. It was probably fine to run in, but he liked the way Steve paused his thought and licked his lips. There was nothing wrong with being incorrigible when you got encouragement like that. “No regrets.”  
  
Steve shook his head to clear it. “And maybe she is going to tell herself that it doesn’t really mean anything if we’re exercising, but yeah. I think there is a strong possibility this ends with sex.”  
  
Bucky stopped with his new shirt halfway on. If they were going to have another shot with Amy, he needed to put his best foot forward. “I should wear clean underwear.”  
  
“You should wear clean underwear.” Steve confirmed pulling on a pair of burgundy boxer briefs he knew looked good on him.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky took a moment to appreciate the sight of Amy stretching. One ankle resting lightly on the railing, her head pressed against her knee, the outline of a leaf shaped knife the length of his palm standing out on the small of her back. Their little Fox, beautiful and deadly as always. Maybe this run wouldn’t be so bad.  
  
“Ready when you are, sweetheart.” Steve said warmly, draping an arm around Bucky’s shoulder.  
  
“Try and keep up.” Amy winked and vaulted the balcony railing. One hand on the smooth steeply slanted surface of the building, she controlled the speed of her decent. Down three stories, onto that floor’s balcony and across to the other side. She zigzagged her way to the ground.  
  
From there it was a straight shot into the Forest. Amy threw cation to the wind and sprinted for the trees. Dodging tree trunks. Vaulting dead falls and the boulders that littered the jungle floor. She hadn’t decided where she was going, but just moving like this felt good. Running with the boys at her back. Her tension started melting away.  
  
She turned them north towards the river. She knew where she wanted to go today. The first of the truly large trees loomed ahead of them.  
  
Steve knew his girl well enough at this point to guess at what she had planned. It was about time they went vertical again. He cupped his hands and basket tossed Amy into the tree’s lowest branches. She flipped and landed without breaking stride. Steve grinned and offered Bucky a boost.  
  
Bucky opted to forgo the showy flip Amy had indulged in. Landing in a crouch on a thick branch. A quick glance down showed him Steve backing up for a running start. Back ahead of him Amy leapt from branch to branch with ease. She looked over her shoulder at him. Her violet eyes flashing and lips curling up in a heart stopping smirk.  
  
Bucky had a flashback of children playing tag. Hands that he thought might be his own clutching at petticoats. _Kissed the girls and made them cry._ He didn’t have a lot of childhood memories that weren’t Steve related these days. This felt like one. He liked having happy memories.  
  
Amy came to a stop at the top of her favourite tree walking all the way out to the end of the thin branch that overhung the gorge. The view from here was spectacular. Up the river all the way to the falls that marked the edge of M'baku's territory, down stream to where the river took a sweeping turn north around the planes. Across the gorge, the canopy was alive with birds and other animals all trilling and hooting their evening song. Sunset painted the sky and the tips of the leaves in scarlet and gold.  
  
Bucky stepped out on the slightly thicker branch below hers and curled his hand around Amy’s calf. He couldn’t remember the last time he had watched the sunset with a date. Let alone one he actually cared about. He was sure he had. It was cheap and dames went crazy for that sort of sappy romantic shit. Including Ayame apparently, although he didn’t think any of the girls he used to step out with would get to the romantic view by sprinting full speed along tree branches 50 feet in the air or look so cool and confident on standing on a three inch thick branch over this kind of precipice without any other support. She really should be carrying her sword. If Steve sketched this, and he should, he should add one. “It’s pretty up here.”  
  
“I like it.” Amy smiled down at him.  
  
“Could at least one of you stand on a branch thick enough to support your weight?” Steve grumbled from closer to the trunk. When they were moving was one thing but standing still hanging over the edge of a cliff… he couldn’t help the twinge of panic at the idea of either of them falling. Not when his nightmare was so fresh.  
  
Bucky grab the limb he was standing on and swung back towards Steve. “Worried about us, _Mon Ours_?”  
  
Steve slipped an arm around Bucky and pulled him in close. “I always worry about you, Buck. Aims too, for all she's loathed to let me.”  
  
“Come on little Fox.” Bucky called up to Amy on her slim perch. “We’ll race you back.”  
  
Amy dropped onto the branch next to theirs. She hated to admit how much she liked when Bucky called her little Fox. “That hardly seems fair.”  
  
“Because we’re super soldiers and you’re worried about how badly we’re going to beat you?” Bucky asked teasingly.  
  
“Not exactly.” Amy said with a wicked glint in her eye.  
  
“Because Amy doesn’t lose. And she sees better in the dark than we do.” Steve chuckled as Amy took off before anyone could say go.  
  
Bucky yelped indignantly and started after her.  
  
Laughing to himself Steve jogged after them. He loved them both so much. Ridiculous competitiveness and all.  
  
*****  
  
Amy did beat them back. Vaulting over the balcony rail a fraction of a second before Bucky did. Tripping Bucky right before they start climbing might count as cheating, but she didn't regret it. Steve swung over a moment later moving at a more sedate pace.  
  
Amy stretched, lengthening her spine until she felt everything click into place. “I don’t know about you, but I need a shower.”  
  
Bucky grinned. A shower sounded like a very good idea. “Lead the way, baby girl.”  
  
Steve wrapped an arm around Bucky’s waist and leaned his head against Bucky’s as they made their way slowly towards the bathroom. He hated to admit that he was watching Amy’s pert ass bounce down the hallway ahead of them, but he definitely was. Bucky slipped his hand down the back of Steve’s pants and squeezed. Steve thought he was looking too.  
  
*****  
  
Amy moaned as the hot water hit her skin. Everything felt more relaxed now. Her mind was light. Her limbs were loose. All she needed was one quick orgasm and she would sleep for at least ten hours, deep, and dreamless, and content.  
  
Bucky stepped under the shower head next to Amy’s, pulling Steve in with him. Warm water, the crisp smell of soap, Steve’s hands running over his body, Amy glistening wetly next to him. This was as close to perfect a moment as he could imagine. The weight of the last few rough days melted away. Washed down the drain with the steaming water. Bucky leaned into Steve. “You were right. That run was exactly what I needed to get my blood flowing.”  
  
“You boys have fun.” Amy teased, turning off her shower and reaching for her robe. She would feel guilty thinking about her boys fooling around in the shower while she got herself off. But there was no way she was going to get that visual out of her head, so she might as well just lean in.  
  
“Going to go play with that little pink thing you keep hidden under your futon?” Steve asked, watching Bucky’s hand on his hip instead of Amy’s face. He had a plan for this. He wasn’t sure how Bucky would feel about it, but he had one.  
  
Amy snapped back around eyes wide. “How do you know about that?”  
  
“Bucky snoops. He had questions.” Steve shrugged. It wasn’t a big deal. Amy should take care of her needs. She should also know that she had options. “I was just thinking if you were, we could help. I know you like playing with a partner more than playing alone.”  
  
Amy stared at him in disbelief. Her sweet boy could not be suggesting what she thought he was suggesting. It was tempting. It was also a terrible idea. Thinking about them was one thing, leading them on was another.  
  
“It doesn’t have to mean anything.” Steve met her gaze evenly. It was a compromise. He hated it. But if it made Amy and Bucky happy, he would get over it. And his body would appreciate it, even if his heart didn’t.  
  
Amy snorted and pulled her robe over her shoulders. He was getting better at lying, she didn’t know how she felt about that. “You always think sex means something.”  
  
“Yeah.” Steve agreed not breaking eye contact. “But you don’t, Bucky doesn’t, and we’ve already established that I love both of you, so showing you again with no expectations shouldn’t be an issue.”  
  
Bucky shot a nervous look at Steve. He didn’t think sex _always_ had to mean something, but it would this time and Steve knew that. This wasn’t some girl who understood he wouldn’t be taking her home to meet his mother. This was Amy. _Their Amy_. The only girl he'd ever _loved_.  
  
Amy gave them a look that could only be described as disappointed. “Like I said, you boys have fun.”  
  
She swept out of the bathroom in a swirl of indignant, fish patterned, silk.  
  
Steve sighed and slumped against the tile wall. He'd over played his hand. He’d gone all in, and she’d called his bluff. He rubbed his eyes. It had been a good day, and he had ruined it. “Sorry Buck.”  
  
Bucky knew why Steve was apologising. But the idea of being mad at Steve while he was naked and dripping wet felt like sacrilege. Would this have been better with Amy? Sure. But Steve on his own wasn’t exactly a kick in the head. “’s all right Stevie. We’ve to each other, at least.”  
  
“Blood still flowing then?” Steve chuckled as Bucky’s mouth latched onto his neck.  
  
“That a problem?” Bucky growled sliding his hand across Steve’s abs. How Amy had managed to walk away from this, he had no idea. All he knew was he wasn’t about to let a good thing go to waste. Plus, if they were happily exhausted there was less of a chance they would wake up tonight.  
  
Steve melted into the touch. “Nope. The opposite of a problem.”  
  
*****  
  
Two sloppy wet blowjobs later, Steve threw Bucky onto the bed and climbed on top of him. Kissing and caressing Bucky’s neck and shoulders while Bucky moaned and dug his fingers into Steve’s hip. The friction of Bucky rocking against him had him more than ready to go again. Somehow, they had both managed to keep towels around their waists on the trip from the bathroom. Despite roaming hands and sloppy kisses.  
  
Bucky shoved Steve’s towel to the floor and grabbed a handful of his perfect ass. Steve was his. Completely and undeniably his. “I fucking love you.”  
  
“Love you too, Buck.” Steve chuckled nibbling Bucky’s jaw.  
  
Bucky chased Steve’s lips. He wanted this to last forever. Steve’s shower warm body resting over him. Mouths and hands everywhere. Time didn’t matter. The rest of the world didn’t matter. It was just them.  
  
It wasn’t a noise that gave him pause. It was more of a feeling. A presence. The one thing that could matter right now. One person.  
  
Bucky sat up, knocking Steve off him in the process. “Baby girl.”  
  
Steve rolled to the side. Amy was wearing her robe, and he didn’t see the hem of her nightgown poking out. Maybe he hadn’t over played his hand as much as he thought he had.  
  
Bucky reached for Amy. Even if she wasn’t here for sex. At least she was here. “I know Steve can be a bit of an idiot – “  
  
Amy undid the belt of her robe. Letting it fall open to reveal the grey brallette and matching panties underneath. They were both shear, covered in a delicately embroidered flower pattern that left exactly the right amount to the imagination. The effect wasn’t lost on Bucky who stuttered to a stop partway through his sentence. Amy smirked. It was nice to know she hadn’t lost her touch.  
  
Steve grinned evilly and leaned back on his elbows. Now there was a view. “You were saying something Buck.”  
  
“Nope. Steve’s an idiot sometimes. End of statement. No follow up. What was it you wanted to talk about, little Fox?” Bucky reached towards Amy more urgently. He could say a lot of things. None of them felt important with those sultry eyes on him.  
  
“Are you sure there wasn’t more to that thought?” Steve teased absently stroking himself. The three feet between Amy and Bucky was enough to drive him crazy. They should be touching. And he should be touching them.  
  
Bucky looked over at him. Even if there had been, there was no way he’d remember with Steve doing that. “I have a brain thing. Sometimes I forget where I was going with an idea. If it was important it will come back to me.”  
  
Amy stepped a little closer so she could twine a lock of Bucky’s hair around her finger. It was so touchable since he’d started using conditioner. “You can’t just go around using your ‘brain thing’ as an excuse, Bucky baby.”  
  
“Can’t I? I'll work on that in…” Bucky hooked his arm around her waist and reeled her until she was straddling his lap, her knees on either side of his legs. “Two, maybe three, hours.”  
  
“Well, aren’t you optimistic.” Amy purred as Bucky’s hand roamed lower. He stayed outside her underwear for now, but the heat of his touch still sent a tingling rush of pleasure straight through her.  
  
“Right now, I fucking am.” Bucky pressed a line of kisses up her side over her tattoo. From the little fox to the white star. Visuals for both the people he loved inked into her skin. She was here, mostly naked. Steve was here completely naked. Why wouldn’t he be optimistic?  
  
Amy shivered. She had always hated beards. They tickled and scratched and left her skin raw and tender. So why did Bucky’s stubble feel like electricity pouring into her body and filing her with fizzling energy?  
  
Steve stroked her cheek softly. There was an edge to her easy sensuality today. He would say she was nervous, but he didn’t think Amy got nervous in bed. “You changed your mind?”  
  
“I did.” Amy tipped her head into his hand just a little. His touch was electric too. She was in so far over her head. She might as well just drown in them and deal with the consequences after. If they would let her. “Did you?”  
  
“No.” Steve trailed his fingers down her neck and arm to her hand. He slipped his hand into hers. “I want you here. On whatever terms you need to feel okay with it. And you can tell how Bucky feels.”  
  
Bucky nuzzled Amy’s chest. He loved her soft little bra things so damn much, especially the sheer ones. They did absolutely nothing to keep him from Amy’s perfect nipples. “Fuck, they look so pretty hard.”  
  
Amy curled a hand around the back of Bucky’s head as he nipped at her nipples through her bra. She kept her eyes focused on Steve. He was the one she was worried about right now. She could always put a stop to Bucky’s foreplay if this negotiation went poorly. “No strings?”  
  
Steve pressed her knuckles to his lips. “Just sex. We won’t expect anything to change in the rest of our lives. Or even for this to turn into a regular thing.”  
  
“Good. Because it’s not going to. I just…” Amy bit her lip. She was going to be selfish in bed again. She didn’t really care. She just wanted to feel good for at least a little while. Steve could give her that. Bucky could give her that. Then she could fall asleep in blissful haze and not have to deal with _why_ she wanted this until tomorrow. “I need this.”  
  
"I've got you, sweetheart." Steve kissed the inside of her wrist. He could feel her blood pounding just below the surface. She was scared. She didn’t have to be. If this was what she needed they could give her this much. “Let us help. Let us take care of you.”  
  
She dragged her fingers down Bucky’s jaw. Making him look up at her. Steve was resilient. He could handle her leaving again, Bucky she was less sure of. “You’re good with this, baby? You know it doesn’t mean I’m staying forever?”  
  
Bucky ran his hand around the back of her neck. “It means you’re here right now.” He dragged her down into a kiss. Working her lips open and letting their tongues tangle together before she could realize he hadn’t answered the question she had asked.  
  
Steve watched almost hypnotised. Bucky’s hand on the curve of Amy’s waist. The fall of her hair over his shoulder as she tucked her head against his neck. He wondered what it would be like to try and put this moment to paper. Did he even have a chance of capturing the length of Bucky’s lashes or the way Amy’s neck arched when Bucky tipped her head back. The dye in her hair was fading and growing out. Leaving her with a kind of ombre, from starlight silver through dove grey, all the way to midnight black. He loved it. The colour, the way it looked sweeping over Bucky’s skin, the amount of time it represented. He kissed the inside of Amy’s wrist again. He wanted to see her with pure white hair again, pure white hair twisted in Bucky’s fist while they took turns sucking him again.  
  
Amy sat back on Bucky’s knees breathing hard. She could feel Steve’s eyes burning into her. That same hot passion that always set her skin on fire when he watched her do something naughty. She couldn’t help the feeling that she was interrupting. The boys had clearly been enjoying themselves before she had arrived. There was a solution to that though. She just had to make sure they had as much fun with her as they would have without. She licked her lips. There was an obvious way to ensure that. She leaned forward to whisper her idea in Bucky’s ear.  
  
“You have a fucking filthy mind baby girl.” Baby growled. She painted the prettiest picture. He couldn’t wait to see it in the flesh. “Show me.”  
  
That was one of them on board. Amy ducked her head and looked at Steve through her lashes. She didn’t think he was going to be hard to convince either. “Want me to get you ready for Bucky, _Mon Ours_?”  
  
The last time Steve had felt this dazed someone had blown him up. Bucky was grinning wolfishly at him, Amy in his lap. Amy was going to open him up, then Bucky was going to fuck him. None of his blood was flowing to his brain right now.  
  
“Answer the lady, punk.” Bucky reached over and punched Steve’s arm. The movement forced Amy to cling to him to avoid being dislodged. He liked that. Amy’s fingers digging into the flesh of his shoulders.  
  
Steve rolled into the middle of the bed. Stretching out on his stomach. “Please.”  
  
Amy straddled Steve’s legs, gently kneading at his firm muscles, bottle of lube resting against her knee. He had the best ass. She always thought so. She kissed the base of his spine and pressed his cheeks apart. It was just so edible. She had missed it.  
  
Bucky peeled open his towel and lazily gave himself a few strokes. It was even better than he’d imagined. Steve rolled his face towards him, mouth already partly open and lashes fluttering in time with what Amy was doing to him. Bucky ran his thumb over Steve’s lower lip. Steve’s tongue lapped that pad of the thumb. It looked like more of a reflex than a deliberate motion. “She’s got your number, doesn’t she pretty boy?”  
  
Steve moaned and clutched at the sheets. She really did. He’d almost forgotten how good it felt when Amy prepped him. She was just so _thorough_. Her tongue. Her fingers. Everything.  
  
Bucky rubbed Steve’s back and shoulders. Pretty girl, pretty boy, pretty picture, and all his. He slid his hand down until he could curl his fingers into Amy’s hair. She looked up at him with mischievous eyes. Dear god, that sparkle. “You’re killing me here, baby girl. Makin’ Stevie make all those pretty noises. ‘s he ready yet?”  
  
Amy dug her nails into Steve’s hip growling possessively. She wasn’t done.  
  
Bucky's eyes darkened. If Amy wasn’t going to share, he would just have to find something else to keep himself occupied. Amy was still wearing those filmy panties. He could fix that.  
  
Amy froze as Bucky dragged her underwear down past her hips. The sudden scruff of his beard against the sensitive skin of her thighs made her gasp.  
  
“Don’t get distracted baby girl.” Bucky chuckled wrapping his arm around so he could stroke and lick her at the same time. His girl was delicious.  
  
Amy whimpered. How was he so good at this? This was only his second time with her, but he already knew exactly how to drive her crazy. It was hard to maintain the rhythm she had established with Steve. She gasped and squirmed as best she could without losing her grip.  
  
Bucky chuckled and plunged his tongue deeper. That’s what he wanted to hear, the beautiful noises that came back to him in his dreams. Steve and Amy moaning and gasping. He shifted his grip, so his thumb was resting firmly over her clit. It sounded like she was getting close. Steve sounded close too.  
  
Amy smothered a scream, hand spasming on Steve’s hip. The fingers inside him curling involuntarily. She was right on the edge. Bucky’s tongue, his fingers, the scratch of his beard. The heat and taste of Steve under her. She closed her eyes and let the sensations wash over her.  
  
Steve swore and tried to hold still. He wasn’t going to come from this. But god damn he was closer than he had any right to be. He wished he could see what Bucky was doing that was making Amy lose control like she was.  
  
Bucky grinned. Rubbing his thumb in another circle and making her twitch again. Another flick of his tongue, a slightly firmer circle. And she was more than twitching.  
  
Amy dropped to the side panting hard. Legs twitching in time with the contractions of her orgasm.  
  
Bucky licked his lips. That was a good look on her. He didn’t think she was done, but she would be alright to rest for a bit while he took care of his boy. “Ready Stevie?”  
  
“Get your ass over here.” Steve propped himself on an elbow and reached for Bucky. He was more than ready.  
  
Bucky grabbed a handful of Steve perfect round glutes and squeezed. “This _is_ my ass.”  
  
“Just fuck him, or I will.” Amy growled rolling over to kneel next to Steve’s head. She wanted her show… She wanted to climb on top and ride one or both until she couldn’t walk straight, but the show would be almost as good.  
  
Bucky leaned over and kissed her cheek. Steve had told him stories about Amy fucking him. It was pretty high on the list of things he wanted to see in real life too. “Next time, baby girl.”  
  
He maintained eye contact with Amy as he slid in. She’d done her job perfectly. He made it all the way in without feeling like he was forcing things. Bucky leaned forward on his elbow breathing long and slow as he gave Steve a chance to get used to his size. Wet. Slippery. Tight, but no resistance. “Fucking hell. You feel so damn good Stevie.”  
  
Steve grunted and pushed back onto Bucky. Bucky felt pretty good himself. If he would just _move_.  
  
The room filled with the sound of flesh on flesh as Bucky took the hint. Long slow strokes at first, then speeding up as they both adjusted to the sensation.  
  
Bucky looked up at Amy. She was watching them. Lower lip trapped between her teeth. Eyes bright with arousal. It didn’t seem fair that she was just watching. Not when they had worked so hard to get her here. She should be having fun too. She should be making those delightful noises again. He looked down at Steve’s back. They couldn’t keep neglecting their girl like this. Not when he could almost see her dripping from here.  
  
He pulled out of Steve and smacked him on the shoulder. “Roll over.”  
  
Rolling over sounded like a good idea. Laying on his stomach he couldn’t get the kind of friction his cock was begging for. If he rolled over, he could get a hand around himself, or Amy could, or even better than that, Amy could get her mouth on him.  
  
Bucky grabbed a pillow and jammed it under Steve’s hips to keep him at a good angle. When he had thought they would be sleeping together regularly he had wanted to build up to this. If it was going to be an infrequent thing, he wanted it now. He wanted to be able to close his eyes and see both of them writhing in pleasure.  
  
“Hmmm. Those baby blues really are something.” Amy massaged Steve’s scalp. They weren’t actually that blue right now, just a little sliver of iris showing. They were still very pretty. Blissed out as he was, Amy was surprised there was any blue left at all. She was also surprised that Bucky would decide to change position. It had sounded like he wasn’t that far from his climax.  
  
Bucky smirked. Baby girl had no idea what he had planned. Good. He loved a fun surprise. “They are. They’re not why he needed to roll over.”  
  
Amy made a startled noise as Bucky grabbed her around the waist.  
  
“Steve, you’ll need a condom.” Bucky growled, dropping his head to Amy’s nipples.  
  
Steve swore under his breath. Bucky was a fucking genius. He passed Amy the foil square Bucky had told him to grab. The sooner he was inside her, the better. “Put this on for me, sweetheart? I’ll make you feel good.” Bucky slid back inside him, making him moan. “So fucking good.”  
  
Amy tried not to drool. This was too good to be a dream. She should feel guilty, but she had come this far, and it would just be stupid to back out now. With deft hands she tore open the packet and rolled the sheath over Steve’s girth. She let Bucky do the literal heavy lifting with lining her up and sunk down onto Steve with a long sigh. Steve closed his hands around her hips rocking her gently to warm her up.  
  
She tipped her head back and found it rested perfectly on Bucky’s shoulder. Oh yes, this was exactly what she needed.  
  
Bucky growled in pleasure as Steve started to move with more oomph. When Steve thrust in and out of Amy it also worked him on and off Bucky. All Bucky had to do was hold still and Steve would practically fuck himself.  
  
That didn’t mean Bucky wasn’t going to help. He wrapped his hand around the back of Steve’s knee and started to move again.  
  
Ecstasy. Pure ecstasy washed over Steve. Amy, Bucky, Bucky, Amy. It felt so much better in reality than it ever could have in his imagination. He was no where near his climax, but everything already felt like fireworks.  
  
“Kiss me.” Bucky panted biting Amy’s shoulder. He needed her. He was getting close. But he wanted the taste of Amy in his mouth to help get him there.  
  
Amy turned. Steve still had a firm grip on her hips, so she could only twist halfway. It was enough. She got an arm around Bucky’s neck and crushed their mouths together. It was a disjointed sloppy kiss as they moved at different rhythms. It was desperate, and needy, and completely perfect.  
  
She gasped into Bucky’s mouth as Steve brought her down onto him harder. She couldn’t tell if he was frustrated because he wasn’t the one kissing her or aroused by the sight of them kissing. Either way it didn’t matter. As long as he kept doing that and Bucky kept kissing her like they were drowning. Pleasure started to bubble up inside her like a waiting geyser. She clung to Bucky gasping into and around their continued kiss.  
  
Bucky couldn’t take it. Steve squeezing him, Amy rubbing against him. It was all too much. He couldn’t hold it in any longer. He thrust hard into Steve, bottoming out as he shuddered and came.  
  
The feeling of Bucky twitching and throbbing inside him pushed Steve over the edge. He groaned and thrust up into Amy. Tightening his hands on her hips as he finished deep inside her. He could feel Amy clamping around him with her own orgasm.  
  
Amy slumped forward on Steve’s chest exhausted. Sparks of pleasure dancing behind her eyes. Good. She felt _so good_. Warm and loved. Like floating weightless through a world without pain. She rocked forward and to the side. Sliding off of Steve and sprawling across the blankets. A deep sense of contentment weighed down her limbs. She never wanted to move again.  
  
Steve snagged Bucky’s condom to tie off a long with his own. He dropped both in the garbage next to the bed, before wiping his hands on the sheet. He was a sore, a little worn out, and more convinced than he had ever been that this was where he belonged.  
  
Bucky climbed up Steve’s body, placing a kiss every few inches as he went. He stopped once their heads were level. “Have I mentioned that I’m in love with you?”  
  
Steve combed a hand through Bucky’s hair. “Yeah, Buck. It’s come up.”  
  
“Good.” Bucky rolled off Steve, into the space between Steve and Amy. Screw Steve and his ‘no strings sex’. This was where and how he wanted to fall asleep for the rest of his life. “Cuz I’m with you.”  
  
“Till the end of the line.” Steve replied kissing the point of Bucky’s shoulder. He loved them both so much. These stolen moments with them were the best parts of his life these days. He horded them to dream of when he needed something to keep away the nightmares.  
  
Amy rolled towards the edge of the bed. As much as she didn’t want to move, it seemed liked good time for her to leave and clean herself up. She would sleep better if she wasn’t sticky, and by the time she got back the boys would probably be asleep. Curled together like the loved birds they were.  
  
Bucky caught her around the ribs and dragged her back to them. If she got up now, she would find all sorts of excuses to avoid coming back to bed. Despite the fact bed was exactly where she belonged. “Nice try. I'm with you too, baby girl.”  
  
“I’m all gross. Let me wash.” Amy grumbled and squirmed. If she wanted to, it wouldn’t be hard to break his grip and slip away. She wasn’t trying that hard. She liked the feeling of Bucky’s calloused palm on her ribs.  
  
“Not willing to risk it.” Bucky scooped her up and rolled over and dropped her onto Steve. “I will get a cloth to clean you up.”  
  
Steve shifted so they were both more comfortable. Slipping his arms around her. “Your life will be easier if you accept that we are going to cuddle right now.”  
  
Amy sighed and leaned back against him. Cuddling didn’t exactly scream no strings, but she would stay, if they insisted. She had to admit, they were as good at keeping her warm as a shower. And the shower didn’t rub the back of her neck the way Steve did. She was already half asleep by the time Bucky came back with a warm damp cloth.


	54. Wake Up Calls

Amy squeezed her eyes closed against the morning light. It was too early. Her next bedroom was going to be west facing. With blackout curtains. And maybe shutters.  
  
There was a strange noise coming from somewhere in the suite. It wasn’t threatening, it was actually rather sweet sounding, she just couldn’t place it. She reached out for Bucky he would know. Only he wasn’t in bed. Steve was, her fingers brushed his warm side. Which meant the noise had to be Bucky. “Is he _whistling_?”  
  
Steve laughed at her incredulity. He wrapped his arms around her and pulled her over to his side of the bed. That was better. That was where she belonged. “ _Bye bye blackbird_ , from the sound of it. He does that when he’s in a good mood. God, it’s good to see him happy.”  
  
“Happy…” Amy buried her face in Steve’s chest. “Oh hell, I'm such a bitch.”  
  
Steve frowned. That’s wasn’t what you wanted to hear the morning after sex. “What’s wrong?”  
  
Amy took a shaky breath. Bucky was happy because of last night. But last night had been another one-time thing. She was going to hurt them because she was weak and had craved the feeling of warm bodies around her. “I shouldn’t have…. I just…”  
  
“Everyone wanted what happened last night. We all went into it with eyes open.” Steve stroked her hair softly. She was hurting herself. Being here. Being around them. It was hurting her, and he didn’t know how to make that stop. Or he did but he hated it. “If you… if you need to leave… to go home… you can. We'll…” Steve trailed off. He’d almost said they would be fine, and that wasn’t true at all. They’d be miserable and lost without her, but it would almost be better than knowing they were hurting her. “We’ll figure it out. Whatever you need, sweetheart. As long as you're okay.”  
  
Amy looked up at him. Her chest was tight. Her eyes were damp. “Do you want me to leave?”  
  
Steve’s arms tightened instinctively at the thought. “No. God no. But I don’t want to hurt you either. I want to see you happy too, and clearly, I have no idea how to give you that.”  
  
Amy bit her lip, dropping her eyes again. There was a lot of feeling behind that objection. He still cared about her. Still loved her. And she had used him for sex. Because she was a selfish hedonistic creature with no regard for other people’s feelings. Which hadn’t mattered. Until it did.  
  
The silence lingered for a long moment. Steve didn’t rush her. Just held her close in case this was the last time he got to.  
  
She traced the outline of Steve’s arm where it filled her vision. Home. Dai and Kiki and her team. Work. The ability to get whatever she wanted to eat whenever she wanted to eat. Her own room. No boys down the hall breaking her heart. No one stealing her covers or mauling her at all times of day and night. No more breakfast with Bucky. No more Steve making her laugh during her naginata practice. The loss of a thousand tiny things made her heart break. “I don’t want to leave.”  
  
“Okay.” Steve held his breath. ‘Don’t want to’ and ‘not going to’ weren’t the same thing when it came to Amy.  
  
Amy curled her hand around his arm. She had to give them up some day. But not today. “I want to stay.”  
  
Steve felt like a mountain had been lifted off his chest. That was a little better. “Okay.”  
  
Amy shifted to look at him again. He made it sound so simple. Asking to keep them was like asking for the moon. Gods, she had a better chance at the moon. Her grandmother could probably get her that. But she didn’t want the moon. “I want to kiss you.”  
  
Steve laughed and tucked a finger under her chin. “That’s okay too.”  
  
He rolled Amy onto him. Her weight felt good there. Right. He cupped her jaw and held her still while he pressed his lips against hers. Softly at first. Then harder and more passionately as she responded. Her hands sliding around the back of his head.  
  
Every time he tried to pull away, Amy tightened her hands in his hair and pulled him back in.  
  
Bucky leaned against the door frame watching them. This was what he wanted to see in the morning. The sheets tangled around their legs. Steve’s hand curled around Amy’s waist making her look absolutely tiny. “I made pancakes, but I can keep them warm in the oven if we’re not ready.”  
  
Amy started and slid off Steve feeling sheepish. Steve was grinning like a mad man. Bucky was watching her like he wanted to devour her. And she was sure she looked… well like she had spent the night with a pair of amorous enhanced soldiers and then kissed one of them like she was drowning as soon as she woke up.  
  
“No… ummm.” Amy combed a hand through her hair to try and make herself look presentable. “Breakfast sounds good.”  
  
She grabbed her robe and pulled it tight around her. Breakfast sounded like a good way to get herself centred again.  
  
Bucky grabbed Amy’s arm and pulled her in against his chest. Sliding his hand up to the back of her neck. He held her close and kissed her breathless himself. If Steve got to, he wasn’t about to miss his chance. When he finally let her go, she stayed pressed tight against him. Her hands tangled in his shirt. Her breath coming in pleasingly ragged bursts. Bucky gently rubbed his thumb over her lips. Now that was what his girl’s mouth should look like. Kiss bruised and perfect. “You’re cute when you blush.”  
  
That only made Amy blush harder. She carefully extracted her hands from his shirt.  
  
Steve laughed and wrapped his arms around their shoulders. “Leave my girl alone Buck. I’m starving.”  
  
Amy ended up eating breakfast sitting in Bucky’s lap. She told herself it was because it was easier to feed him pieces of the apple she was cutting up. The truth was his hand felt good spread over her stomach holding her in place. Steve had his arm draped over the back of their chair, leaning back in his seat, lips curled up as he watched them with eyes full of affection.  
  
*****  
  
Amy wasn’t hiding from the boys. She had things to do. Lunch with the queen mother. She had promised Nakia they could spar weeks ago. There was hand laundry she had been putting off. Weapons care. There were a million little things to keep her busy. It wasn’t hiding. She was genuinely busy.  
  
Could she have taken her sword out into the main room and fixed the wrapping on the hilt at there? Maybe, but she preferred the low worktable in her room. She was used to working kneeling. Standing or sitting in a chair would mess up her tensioning. Sloppy wrapping on a hilt lead to things slipping at inopportune moments. That was it. That was why she had shut herself away after dinner. Working the creamy silk between her fingers was meditative. She’d been wrapping her own sword hilts since she was six. It was one of the ways she relaxed.  
  
Cream bindings and silver fastenings in place, she moved on to sharpening and oiling the blade. The rhythmic rasp of metal on metal was even more soothing than the wrapping had been.  
  
Laundry day was a fantastic day in Bucky’s opinion. Everything in Amy’s room smelled like floral soap. She had lines strung between the weapon racks. Lines hung with filmy scraps of fabric. He moved slowly through the forest of hanging silk, brushing his fingers over the liquid softness. He hooked the strap of a bralette and tugged it off the line. He thought he liked this one more than the one she had worn yesterday. The black lace would look amazing against Amy’s skin.  
  
Amy eyed him curiously but didn’t move from her spot. She wasn’t hiding, so she didn’t need to run, just because Bucky had found her.  
  
“Back in my day good girls didn’t wear dark underwear.” Bucky said waggling the lingerie at her.  
  
Amy snorted and checked the edge of her blade. “No one has ever mistaken me for a _good girl_.”  
  
“No, I suppose not.” Bucky sat down next to her. He propped his head on his hand, inclining his whole body towards her. He thought he knew at least part of the reason she’d been avoiding them all day. If he was right, there was a least one worry he could lay to rest. “Can I tell you a secret?”  
  
“Always.” Amy set down her sword and turned her full attention to Bucky. A secret could be good or bad. Either way she shouldn’t be distracted when he was putting that kind of trust in her.  
  
“Steve and I had sex. Just the two of us, and I hardly freaked out at all." Bucky tugged at a lock of her hair. He and Stevie had clicked into place together so naturally, he was embarrassed to admit that he may have forgotten that things didn't normally work like that. He'd forgotten that even if his little Fox saw the space where she fit in their lives, she might not realize that the jagged edges that stopped her sliding in naturally could be sanded away. He'd forgotten that he needed to do that sanding. That if he wanted her in his life, in their life, he had to put in the work. "We’ve fooled around a few times since then. I’m doing so much better since our little Russia excursion. The farm is helping too, having something of my own to focus on. I'm getting better.”  
  
“Bucky Baby! That’s great.” Amy lit up unreservedly. She knew they could be happy together. Perfectly, deservedly, happy.  
  
“It was.” Bucky slid his arm around Amy and pulled her closer. Her side pressed against his. “But it was missing something. It was missing you. We want you. We need you. Not because of any of this. Because you're you.”  
  
Amy pushed at his wrist and shifted away. No. She wasn’t missing. If anything, she was in the way. Because they _could_ be perfectly happy without her. “Bucky.”  
  
“I know. But think about it.” Bucky pulled her flush against his side again. “Forget what we have now, it would have been illegal for Steve and I to _kiss_ when I fell in love with him. And you doll. You’re from a completely different century from either of us. Neither of us should ever have met you, let alone had anything like a chance at happiness with you.” He nuzzled her ear. So few things in his life had made him happy. But she did. Steve did. Together they made him feel like he could fly. Or at least like he could be more than what Hydra had made him.  
  
“Any individual combination of us should be impossible. You and Steve. You and me. Me and Steve.” He kissed Amy’s neck between each example. Her eyelashes fluttered against her cheeks. There was so much control there. She was holding herself in check, when she should be letting go. Letting herself love them the way they loved her. “Why should the three of us together be anymore impossible?”  
  
Amy leaned her head against his shoulder. She couldn’t begin to explain how much she wished he was right.  
  
Bucky tightened his hold on her waist. “Steve said you told him you want to stay.”  
  
Amy curled tighter against his side. “I do.”  
  
“So stay.” Bucky kissed her hair. Steve had been so happy when he’d told him about his conversation with Amy. He wanted the three of them to be together so much. Bucky wanted that too, but he could see why their girl was afraid. She was naturally risk averse, and regardless of what the payoff was, they were asking her to take a huge risk. If it worked, it would be worth it. If it didn’t, she wouldn’t be the only one broken by the experience. If she loved them the way he thought she did, she wouldn’t want to subject them to that. "Give us a chance, baby girl. Just a chance."  
  
Amy bit her lip. Steve had meant for now. Bucky meant forever. Forever was a very long time. They thought they needed her right now. What happened when Bucky recovered enough that he didn’t? When they wanted to take the next step with each other, and she was cluttering up their space? “It’s not enough, Bucky baby. Needing me. Being attracted to me. Saying those things. Steve saying he loves me… It’s not enough. It’s just… words. Words have power, but they also aren’t real.”  
  
That pulled Bucky up short. Not enough? If none of that was enough for her… “What would be?”  
  
“I don’t know.” Amy released her sword and rubbed her eyes. It wasn’t that she didn’t believe Steve when he said he loved her, it was that she didn’t trust that love not to shatter like the beautiful bobble it was when reality intruded on their life again. “Maybe nothing.”  
  
Bucky closed his eyes and rested his head against her shoulder. He refused to believe that there was no hope for them. “There has to be something, baby girl. There are people in your life who love you. I’ve seen them. I’ve heard you talking to them on the phone. How do you know they love you?”  
  
Amy shook her head. It wasn’t the same thing. “They’re my family. They’ve always loved me. They’ve always been there for me, and they always will be.”  
  
Bucky tipped his head to the side, studying her face. It was obvious really. Stability. That was what their girl wanted and needed. Not words. Not grand romantic gestures. Just stable, committed love. And life with Steve had given her the exact opposite, even before Bucky had come crashing back in.  
  
“Pretty boy never gave you a chance to get your feet under you, did he? He thought you were taking blind leaps of faith like he does,” It wasn’t Steve’s fault. Everything around them hade been moving bat the speed of sound. Every time they might have had space to breath, something else went sideways. He wouldn’t have noticed that Amy was off balance until they had a chance to stand still. And they still hadn’t had one of those. Not really. He tipped his head to the other side, softly touching her cheek again. He hadn’t noticed either. He’d been so blinded by her overt confidence in most things, he’d missed exactly how terrified she was of this part of their world. “When the truth is, you just see better than us in the dark.”  
  
Bucky tucked her hair behind her ear. "We'll do better, baby girl. We'll be there for you. No matter what."  
Amy traced the silk wrappings on her sword hilt. Each wrap neatly in place. Putting together a sword was easy. She’d been doing it practically since she could walk. Bucky and Steve made their future sound just as easy. “You're forgetting something.”  
  
“My own name half the time.” Bucky leaned against the edge of the table. Details slipped his mind all the time. But he was getting better about remembering the important things. The shaped of _Ryzhiy’s_ smile, the sound of Amy’s laugh, the feel of Steve’s breath on the back of his neck as they fell asleep. Things that actually mattered. “What were you thinking, specifically?”  
  
Amy kept her eyes dead ahead, deliberately away from the man next to her. “What if we don’t beat the odds?”  
  
Bucky cupped her chin and made her look at him. She had every right to be scared of that worst-case scenario. But not trying only ensured that outcome. “We'll figure that out when it happens.”  
  
“Bucky…” Amy brushed his hand away from her face. He was doing that thing where he stared into her soul again.  
  
“It will be okay, baby girl. We can handle it. All of it. Promise me you'll think about it? Think about how good the three of us could be together.” Bucky cupped her head and kiss her between the eyes. She wasn’t ready yet. She was scared. He would wait. They would wait. If she needed time to come to them, they would give her time. They would do the work to be worthy of everything she gave them. “And when you’re ready to take the leap. We'll be here to catch you. I will be here to catch you.” He kissed her neck again. He would wait. But he wasn’t about to stop trying to entice her. “And until then, I’m going to keep reminding you just how much fun that jump is.”  
  
He dropped the scrap of black lace into her lap. The build up could be just as much fun as the climax. And no mater what she decided in the short term, he and Steve would be there for her. "Don't be afraid, little Fox. I'm right here for you."  
  
*****  
  
The following week was calm. Bucky kept up his flirting, now mixing gentle assurances that they weren't going any where. His little Fox needed consistency, he could be as constant as the northern star for her. An easy and enjoyable mission, since it mostly consisted of kissing her every morning, and wrapping himself around her to sleep. He loved falling asleep with her cuddled against his chest and Steve curled around him from behind. And they did sleep. His was deep and dreamless most of the time. He caught Amy shivering in the shelter of his arm once, and kissed her awake quickly. Whispering reassurances as he pressed soft kisses to her forehead and cheeks. That had been two days ago.  
  
Tonight, she seemed perfectly at peace. Bucky knew he was, holding her close with his face buried in her silky hair.  
  
Amy’s phone made a shrill wringing noise, vibrating violently against the surface of the nightstand. Rubbing sleep from her eyes, Amy struggled out of her position as the littlest spoon.  
  
Steve made an irritated noise in his throat, trying to pull Amy back into the pile of limbs that was their sleeping position the last few days. Ever since they'd started opening up to each other.  
  
“That’s the emergency number.” Amy said peeling his fingers off her arm.  
  
Steve sighed and let her go. Cuddling closer to Bucky in compensation. She had to answer the emergency number. Even if it meant leaving the two of them in bed without her.  
  
Amy swiped to answer her baby brother’s call. “I was asleep. You’d better be actively dying.”  
  
“I won’t be if you can manage to talk me out of this mess.” Ken's voice had the strained quality of someone trying to stay calm in a bad situation. “How’s your Dogri?”  
  
“I can muddle through. My accent isn’t great.” Amy swung her legs out of bed and set her feet on the cool floor.  
  
“I suspect the fact your female is going to be more of an issue than muddy vowels. But you try finding a fluent male translator at this time of day.” Ken sounded calmer already.  
  
“Do I want to know why you’re in Jammu?” Amy sighed looking around for her robe. They weren’t actively in a fire fight. She could probably fix this without having to leave.  
  
“No phones in bed.” Bucky grumbled pushing on the centre of Amy's back. Steve’s rule. Bucky hadn’t understood it until he had figured out how much of a workaholic little Fox was. Give her an inch and she would forgo sleep in favour of doing 'one more thing’. Making her get up meant that they could usually guilt her into taking a break under the pretext of helping them sleep. And once they had her in bed they could usually get her to drift off at least for a few hours.  
  
“Shhh, I'm getting up.” Amy soothed grabbing her robe.  
  
“Who was that?” Ken asked distractedly.  
  
“A guy.” Amy said vaguely.  
  
“It sounded like he was asleep.” A touch of suspicion creeping into Ken’s voice. "You said _you_ were asleep."  
  
“Ghost…” A worried voice called in the background.  
  
Amy said a silent thanks for the distraction. She didn’t need either of her brothers getting ideas. “Do you want to talk about my love life, or do you want me to negotiate with the men I assume have guns trained on your squad right now?”  
  
“Negotiate please.” Ken sighed.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky woke up again two hours later. Steve was snoring softly on his right, but the left side of the bed was empty. Amy still wasn’t back.  
  
He didn’t bother pulling a shirt on as he padded into the wider suite to look for her. Or at least the note she would have left if she had to go away. His feet tangled a little in his too long pyjama pants, technically Steve’s pyjama pants but they weren’t really keeping track of whose clothes were whose when it came to things that fit them both these days. That was one of the benefits of being together he hadn’t considered. Any time he needed a little extra stability he could just slip on something that smelled like Steve and suddenly the world felt a little less out of control. The fact Amy fit inside Steve’s oversized sweaters with him helped too. Even if she did half-heartedly grumble about him mauling her when he tried to zip her in. She usually gave in and let him keep her there once he got her settled in his lap and she could slip her arm through the empty sleeve and work on her ever-present phone.  
  
He found his little Fox exactly where he had expected to. Cross legged on the couch. She was still on the phone. Eyes closed as she translated out loud in real time. A map of Himalayan foothills folded back on itself on the table. Splashes of red ink showing Amy’s notations. A pad of paper covered in notations in several languages rested under her left hand. Her computer was open in front of her.  
  
Amy consulted her paper map as well as satellite images of the same area. They only sort of matched, which was complicating the task at hand to an irritating degree. “You’re going to head north along that road for two kilometres.”  
  
Bucky listened and watched. She was giving directions to what sounded like a full squad moving at a forced march. Maybe a little faster from the distances and times she was giving. Her intelligence was coming half from the papers and computer around her and half from what had to be a local speaking a language he didn’t recognise, but she seemed to be fluent in. That he didn’t even recognise the language was a surprise, he could pick up at least a few words in most of the major world languages these days. He wasn’t surprised that she spoke it. He had yet to meet a language his little Fox didn’t speak.  
  
Bucky kissed the back of her neck softly. It was good to know they weren’t the only ones she occasionally had to rescue. “I’ll make you some tea.”  
  
“ _Thanks_.” Amy mouthed before turning her focus back to her notes. “There should be a T intersection. Let me know when you get there.”  
  
Amy could almost hear her brother's head snap up on the other end of the line. “Was that the guy again? Is he in your rooms?”  
  
Amy snapped her fingers next to the microphone. Her brother was getting of topic… and to close for comfort. “You are in the middle of contested territory on an officially unsanctioned mission. Can we focus on one thing at a time?”  
  
“You never let guys sleep in your room. You say it gives them ideas.”  
  
“It does give them ideas.” Amy said evenly. It had certainly given Bucky ideas. Agreeing to stay with him that first hard night had been the start of this mess she was in. “Are you at the intersection yet?”  
  
Bucky wrapped a blanket around Amy’s shoulders to ward off the early morning chill. She didn’t need any distractions while she was working. Her tea went next to her right elbow where it wouldn’t interfere with her notes.  
  
Amy smiled as the warmth of the blanket sunk into her. Maybe mess was too strong of a word. Situation sounded better.  
  
Bucky sprawled across the chair kitty corner to her couch. He hooked his knee over the arm, these low squishy chairs of Amy’s begged to be lounged in. From here he had an excellent view of Amy and the controlled chaos of her work. He rubbed his chest absently. This working face was different from the one she wore most days. More serious. More focused. He liked it. The little determined crease between her eyes. The way she rolled a dagger between her fingers while she was thinking. The sharp command in her voice when she reprimanded one of the men on the other end of the line, either in English or the lyrical language he didn’t recognise but could at least place as something either Indian or Middle Eastern. His heart fluttered, his love for her settling deeper into his bones.  
  
She shoved a note across the table at him without looking. Bucky stretched out and plucked it off the wood. Japanese katakana. The characters were rounder than the ones Hydra had shoved into his head. The lines curving in a way he could only call adorable. The femininity of the characters was such a stark contrast with the girl using a knife longer than his hand as a pointer, Bucky felt a bubble of affection for her swell and burst in his chest. It took him a minute to decipher the actual words of message.  
  
_Need an updated map of Northern Jammu. Floods._  
  
Amy wanted help. Help he could give.  
  
*****  
  
By the time Steve got up, Bucky was perched on the back of the armchair. Leaning forward on his knees as he swiped around a real time holographic projection from one of his kimoyo beads. Amy was communicating to him with subtle hand gestures while she alternated between directing her brother and translating for him with the locals.  
  
“What’s up?” Steve asked voice just above a whisper. Her wrapped his arms around Bucky from behind and rested his head on Bucky’s shoulder.  
  
It had taken Bucky a while to piece together the details, but he thought he was at least close to the story. “Helicopter missed it’s drop. They got lost. The locals were unamused by a squad of heavily armed men tramping across their pastures. Amy’s got a pickup flying in for them, and she’s directing them to where they need to be, but it’s tough terrain and it looks like they lost some roads and bridges in the last round of flooding. She was swearing about international infrastructure spending a few minutes ago.”  
  
“So I don’t need to gear up and get on a plane?” Steve asked studying the map projection.  
  
“She wouldn’t let you anyway.” Bucky reached up and scrubbed his palm over Steve’s beard. It had grown in thicker and darker than he had expected. He liked it though. Especially since Amy had given them both beard oil. Now it was soft enough that he was occasionally tempted to just spend all day playing with it. It was like everything Amy came in contact with became more touchable.  
  
“You’re probably right.” Steve kissed Bucky’s neck tenderly. “I’m going for my run. Call if anything big happens.”  
  
Walking behind Amy on the couch Steve pressed his cheek to the top of Amy’s heads. He wanted to make sure she knew he was there for her. “You’re good?”  
  
“I’m fine. Go.” Amy whispered back. She rubbed the big hand resting on her shoulder. It was odd how right this felt. Working like this, independent and unhindered, but supported by her boys. The closest thing to it was working in Dai’s apartment. This was different. There was a subtle air of domestic bliss over everything. It was… nice.  
  
“Okay, there is definitely a guy, who is it?”  
  
“Can’t a girl spend the night with someone who has close ties to the royal family without getting interrogated? Gezze. One more pass and you’re home free.” It was more than one night. There was more than one guy. And those ‘close ties’ were as new as hers and based mostly around the fact that Shuri thinking ‘the white wolf is amusing' and she likes the way he is amazed by everything she builds' as T'Challa put it. Her brother didn’t need to worry about that while he was deployed. Or while he was at home for that matter.


	55. Happy Holidays to You

Today was a good day. The middle of December and the weather here was still perfect. Bucky whistled a lazy version of _Body and Soul_ as he made his way back the embassy from the farm. He’d spent most of his day planting vegetables. With any luck he should be able to thin the lettuce in a week or two and by the beginning of next month he should have something to harvest. Natasha was due back in a couple of days, apparently even assassins like her got to take a break for the holidays these days. And Steve and Amy were waiting for him.  
  
His people were both in the living room. Steve bent over the desk compiling hacked reports into something actionable. Tee-shirt stretched temptingly over his shoulders. Amy paced the floor in the middle of a phone conversation. Sadly, she wasn’t wearing one of Steve’s shirts the way she sometimes did when they were having a lazy day in the suite. Her pencil skirt was almost as good, even if it did mean she would be skipping their nap.  
  
Amy rolled her eyes as her brother lectured her. Just because she had decided not to spend Christmas in the States didn’t mean she was isolating herself. She was _working_. He didn’t understand that there was more to her ambassadorship than just showing up at parties and being congenital. She was the _first_ ambassador to Wakanda. There was a lot to set up. “I’m not going home either.”  
  
“Dai and Fredrick won’t be there. Frederick is being featured at the Venice Masquerade.” That was another thing. If she went to Virginia, her mother would spend the week trying to find someone for her to date now that she was ‘putting herself out there again', and if she went to Japan she would spend the entire time teaching. Neither sounded relaxing. Not the ways staying here would be.  
  
Amy leaned over Steve’s shoulder and made a note on his work. Here at least she could relax. Maybe sleep in. And Nat would be back soon, she could get a couple good sparing seasons in. Hopefully the exercise would burn off some of her energy.  
  
Steve gave her arm a gentle squeeze as she pulled away. It felt a lot like it used to, back when they would sit and work together.  
  
“I’m staying here.” Amy said turning her attention back to Matt, and determinedly away from how normal the interaction with Steve was. “Because I have to work. There’s no diplomatic framework here. I’m starting from scratch.”  
  
Amy waited for the inevitable shift from worrying that she worked too much to stressing about her love life. It came right on schedule. Some days she thought she could set her watch by her brother. At least she could reassure him on that front. “I’m trying this new thing where I don’t sleep with every attractive male that crosses my path. I thought you’d be pleased.”  
  
Bucky untied the scarf he used to cover his bad shoulder when he was outside and rubbed it over the back of his neck. It was good to be home. There was something so blissfully domestic about Amy and Steve working in the same room, the way they both smiled quietly at him when he came in.  
  
Amy pretended she didn’t let her eyes linger on Bucky’s arm to watch the way the muscles bunched and flexed. Just because she had placed a moratorium on casual sex didn’t mean she was turning into a nun. Her prohibition was going terribly where the boys were concerned anyway. She needed to work on that if she was staying. For all Bucky and Steve both thought it was a good idea, she wasn't convinced. “I'm not saying there wasn’t a guy in my room.”  
  
Bucky grinned and shrugged his sarong off his shoulder, leaving him naked to the waist. He loved when his baby girl pretended she wasn’t watching. Her eyes did the most interesting things. He would happily be the guy in her room in the way the person on the other end of the call was implying as well as the way he already was.  
  
Steve blushed down at his work. Amy’s brothers would be even more scandalised if they knew she was sharing her bed with not one but two guys on a regular basis. Two very wanted guys. One of whom was blatantly flirting with her while she was on the phone. He didn’t know if Bucky’s antics were working on her, he couldn’t see her face from this angle, but they were working on him.  
  
Amy pointedly ignored both of them. Just because she had slipped in the recent past didn’t mean she was going to completely give up on the idea of self control. She needed to distract Matt before he started asking _who_ was sharing he bed lately. The less he knew, the safer he was. “Did baby sniper tell you _why_ he was calling me in the middle of the night?”  
  
Matt did know. He also saw straight through her attempt to distract him. Thankfully he guessed wrong when it came to what she was trying to distract him from. He though she didn’t want to talk about why she was avoiding going home. Which to be fair, she didn’t. She let him lecture her about the importance of family and not cutting herself off from her support structures for several long minutes. He had a point. Even if she wasn’t isolating herself quite as much as he seemed to think she was. Eventually he ran out of variations of 'damn it Kit, we love you and we’ll support you no matter what, but if you try to ghost us again I will personally hunt you down and give you such a thrashing'. Amy sighed. Her family loved her. “Tell everyone I’m sorry I had to miss the party and give May and the girls big hugs from me.”  
  
A few more quick affections and Amy hung up the phone.  
  
“Who was that?” Bucky asked kicking his feet up on the coffee table.  
  
Amy perched herself next to him on the arm of the couch. She rolled her shoulders and her neck popped. “My beloved big brother. He is deeply concerned that I’m going to be alone for my birthday.”  
  
“Well, brothers worry.” Bucky pulled her into his lap. He wondered how much more her brothers would worry if they knew the truth. If they were good brothers, they would be happy that she had found people who loved her so much. On the other hand, more than one military and police force had orders to kill them on sight, so it wasn’t all good news. “You don’t have to go cold turkey by the way.”  
  
“What’s that, Bucky baby?” Amy asked distracted as she fixed his hair into a bun. He looked good with his hair pulled back so you could see his face. Steve liked it. The scratch of his pen stopped the moment those soft silvery eyes appeared from under their veil of hair.  
  
Bucky leaned his head back into her hands. “Not sleeping with every attractive male that crosses your path. I’m not saying you should do that, but you deserve to feel good. Maybe you should relax the rule a just little. Only sleep with one or two attractive guys… say the two who are around you the most. I bet they’d be okay with it.”  
  
“Oh?” Amy laughed. In his lap while he was shirtless it sounded like a better idea than it was.  
  
“Yeah.” Bucky stroked his thumb along her jaw tenderly. “I bet they worry about you, and I bet they would be more than willing to help. With that, or with anything else you need.”  
  
“I’m sure they would.” Amy kissed his forehead and eased herself out of his lap. “I have a call with T’Challa and Tokyo in ten minutes. Do you need anything before I head down?”  
  
“We should be fine. We'll shoot you a message if anything comes up.” Steve assured her, swivelling his chair to face her as she started towards the door.  
  
“Hey baby girl?” Bucky called, not getting up from the couch.  
  
Amy turned back to him curiously.  
  
Bucky drummed his fingers on the back of the couch. Her brother was worried she was going to be alone on her birthday. That meant they should make sure she wasn’t. “When _is_ your birthday?”  
  
Amy smiled and shook her head. “Don’t worry about it. It's just a day.”  
  
“Her birthday is New Year’s Day.” Steve said as the door clicked shut behind Amy. He watched Bucky turn the information over, the corners of his mouth slowly turning up. “You have a plan, don’t you?”  
  
Bucky shrugged and pulled the elastic out of his hair. Amy could put it back up when she got back. Steve liked watching when she played with his hair, and he liked the way she massaged his scalp a little as she gathered the bun. “Depends. What did you guys do last year?”  
  
Steve blushed, suddenly very interested in the pen he was holding. “I missed it last year. Work came up.”  
  
Bucky let out a barking laugh. That sounded like Steve. A complete workaholic when it came to things he thought were important. “Not too hard to top then. You wanna take a walk?”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky dropped into a wheeled chair and slid across the lab. Ending with his elbow propped on Shuri’s desk. “Hello princess.”  
  
Shuri flicked her eyes up before returning to the circuit she was soldering. “White Wolf.”  
  
Bucky leaned forward so he was at her eye level. “You look nice today. Did you do something different with your hair?”  
  
Shuri sat back and crossed her arms over her chest. “You don’t have a procedure today. There’s nothing wrong with the farm. I didn’t ask for your help… what do you want?”  
  
Bucky batted his eyes innocently. “Can’t a guy just pop in to say hi to one of his favourite people?”  
  
Steve snorted. Bucky might avoid talking to people he wasn’t comfortable with these days, but he was still a flirt to the core once he was comfortable.  
  
Shuri raised her eyebrows sceptically. She wasn’t about to buy 'stopped by to say hi' as an explanation for why both of them were here. Bucky alone maybe, if he was looking for a distraction and the farm wasn’t cutting it. But not his ever-attentive shadow. Steve Rogers didn’t wander around aimlessly.  
  
“Okay. So, I – we want something.” Bucky confessed. Ideally, he and Steve would be able to do this all on their own, but their little Fox was a tough nut to crack. “But it is a fun thing and I think you'll like it.”  
  
Shuri waved for him to go on. It had to be interesting if it got them to break their strict schedule and come all the way down here to see her.  
  
Bucky grinned. He had her attention. “What are you doing for New Year’s Eve. It’s in two weeks?”  
  
“Nothing.” Shuri looked at him like he was crazy and hooked her circuit up to diagnostics. Maybe it wasn’t interesting. Maybe they were just being strange. Who knew with the broken white boys? “Our new year starts on a different day from the colonisers new year. Talk to me in May, we have a big festival then.”  
  
“That sounds amazing, and you know we will be there with bells on.” He’d hold Amy’s hand all day if that was what it took to keep him stable. Shuri and T'Challa had done so much for them the least they could do was go to a festival and enjoy themselves. “But you’ve got an ambassador here now, and New Year’s is an important part of her culture. You should throw a party. It will be fun. Think about it. Pretty dresses, good food, dancing.”  
  
“Give it up Buck. You've puked on her shoes. She’s not going to fall for your charming act.” Steve said patting Bucky on the shoulder. “January first is Amy's birthday. She’s insisting on staying here, I think she thinks she needs to look after us, and there is no way she'll let us do anything for her.”  
  
Shuri swivelled her chair absently from side to side. Waiting for her diagnostics to finish. See, that was interesting. She was a sucker for a good romance. The 'triangle of pining' as she called it when she dished to her friends was a particularly fun distraction. This was a good chance to push it towards some sort of satisfactory resolution. “But if my brother and I have a party she will feel obligated to go. Since that is officially her job.”  
  
“Got it in one.” Steve beamed at her. Shuri was a romantic. She would help. Hell, he wouldn’t be surprised if she contrived some ridiculous 'tradition' that would force the three of them to kiss.  
  
“And this one thinks he can sweet talk me into it.” Shuri said jerking her head at Bucky. He probably could. She had a soft spot for the poor lost puppy. They’d both lost something when that mad man had blown up the UN, he’d lost what little freedom he’d stolen back, and still he apologized every time the subject came up. It wasn’t his fault he’d done bad things, and he genuinely wanted to make up for it.  
  
“Promise not to puke on your shoes again.” Bucky waggled his eyebrows at her.  
  
“You don’t know what I have planned to deal with that short circuit next week.” Shuri snorted and shoved his chair away from her. They should be entertaining more anyway. It was good practice for when they had to go to things in the outside world now that they weren’t hiding. “I’ll see what I can do.”  
  
Bucky frowned as he spun to a stop. Shuri was already walking away. “There is a very real possibility I spend Christmas in a lot of discomfort, isn’t there?”  
  
Steve rubbed Bucky’s neck soothingly. “Yeah Buck, there is. And if you are, Amy probably will be too, and I'll be spending the day making sure you both have ginger tea and crackers. But we'll be together.”  
  
“I’m going to be pissed if my best Christmas this century was spent eating instant mac and cheese in a Warsaw attic.” Bucky grumbled as they waited for the elevator.  
  
“There’s always next year.” Steve wrapped an arm around Bucky kissing his temple affectionately. Together they started back towards the stairs and the security of their rooms. “Why were you in Warsaw?”  
  
“Tracking a guy.” Bucky sighed and leaned into Steve’s side. A string of bad nights, an Interpol raid, and Bucky had lost him. Hadn’t managed to pick him up for the better part of two months. By the time Bucky had found him again, he’d been dead, with a bouquet of flowers next to him. _Ryzhiy_ and the little Fox gave good Valentine’s day presents.  
  
*****  
  
Christmas week was exactly as miserable as Bucky expected it to be. Shuri’s attempt to fry the problem implant in his head, left him dazed and out of sorts. Memories of the days before ending up fuzzy and indistinct. Time was indistinct. He had to concentrate to remember what year it was. From the way Steve frowned he didn’t always get it right.  
  
Fuzzy memories made him clingy. He and Steve read the through all of _A Christmas Carol_. They watched _Shop Around the Corner_ , which he vaguely remembered dragging Steve and a pair of girls to, as well as some other soft Christmas movies Ayame recommend.  
  
Amy was doing better than Steve had predicted. She had been a little rough right after the procedure and again first thing in the morning, but by noon she had perked back up. She kept both boys constantly supplied with tea and little finger foods. Pressing tender kisses to the top of Bucky’s head or trailing her fingers along Steve’s neck. She even curled up in Bucky’s lap during _White Christmas_.  
  
With Amy's head tucked under his chin and Steve wrapped around him, he felt more like himself. At very least it was hard to feel like a threat to anyone while candy coloured people sang on the screen and he could feel Steve humming along to half the songs.  
  
During _Count Your Blessings Instead of Sheep_ , Steve kissed him behind the ear and held them both a little tighter. Bucky studied the big hand curled around Amy’s knee. Even in his groggy state, he thought it looked right.  
  
He felt Amy’s breathing slow, her muscles relax, her fingers curl around a fist full of his shirt. She had fallen asleep with their arms around her. He loved when she did that. The level of trust she showed them nodding off in a semi-public space. She knew they weren’t a threat and trusted them to protect her from anything that was.  
  
Bucky stroked Amy’s hair back from her face. She nuzzled closer without waking. She was so sweet like this. “I want this. I want us to be real.” He looked up at Steve. “All of us.”  
  
“Me too Buck.” Steve closed his eyes and pressed their foreheads together. He couldn’t begin to express how much he wanted the three of them to be happy. “Me too.”  
  
*****  
  
The next few days were lazy ones too. Steve and Bucky went down to the farm, both stealing a soft kiss from Amy on the way out, but didn’t do much more than look after the animal and do some basic maintenance on the hut.  
  
Natasha arrived in the middle of the week, along with an invitation to a New Year’s party. Bucky dragged her into helping feed the newest addition to the farm, a brand-new baby goat. Shuri had dropped her off, explaining that the kid had been orphaned and needed bottle feeding. So far, she was a hit with the children that hung around the farm, Bucky had to admit he was fond too.  
  
A couple of the human kids came to help them with weeding the little patch of garden. Steve and Natasha spent some time playing soccer with them, while Bucky cheered on the sidelines, the youngest balanced on his shoulder.  
  
Bucky wrapped his arm around Natasha and kissed the side of her head as they walked back. It was good to have his entire family here. Knowing they were all safe made him feel safer.  
  
*****  
  
Natasha threw a pillow at him when he tried to drag her back down to the farm with him the next morning. Bucky chuckled and kissed her on the head before he let her go back to sleep. Freedom was a good look for her.  
  
Bucky didn’t mind doing morning chores alone. The time before the sun was fully up was peaceful. Sleepy goats were sweet, butting against his legs and bleating to demand their breakfast. He fed the goats, and the chickens. Changed their water and turned the compost pile. There were a dozen other little things that needed his attention before he could call it a morning and get his shower.  
  
By the time Bucky got back to the suite all his people had moved to the living room. Steve was hunched over the desk, pouring over maps and intercepted reports, looking for anything that needed their attention. A whole batch of aerial surveillance photos had come in the day before. Steve was tying to match the photos to suspected weapons cashes. Natasha and Amy sat at opposite ends of the couch. Amy typing up a report for the CIA. Nat drawing diagrams for a mission brief on her tablet. Bucky warmed at the harmony of the scene. It was a good day.  
  
Steve looked up at Bucky and smiled. “Good morning?”  
  
“Pretty good, yeah.” Bucky grabbed an icy cold bottle of water out of the fridge.  
  
Natasha leaned back in her seat, tapping her tablet against her knee. She tipped her head from side to side, studying Steve the same way he was studying the aerial photos. There was something about that pose that sparked a distant memory, she just couldn’t put her finger on why. “Does Steve with a beard remind you of anyone?”  
  
Amy leaned out from behind her computer and watched Steve rub his chin deep in thought. The beard was a better look on him than she had thought it would be. If anything, it made his smile brighter. “A young Robert Redford?”  
  
“No. That’s not it.” Nat frowned and rolled the stylus between her fingers. “It’ll come to me.”  
  
“What will come to you?” Bucky asked, pressing the cool bottle against the back of Amy’s neck.  
  
Amy mock glared and batted him away. “Who Steve with a beard looks like.”  
  
“He looks a lot like my boyfriend, or maybe yours, baby girl.” Bucky grinned. It still felt good to say. Steve was his boyfriend. They had a life together. It was a strange kind of normal, but he loved it. He dipped his head and kissed away the condensation he had left on Amy’s skin. “What do you girls want for lunch? I’ll cook.”


	56. New Year, Old Memories

The morning of the party dawned overcast and drizzling. Bucky’s day at the farm left him chilled and coated in mud. He indulged in a long hot shower when he got back to the palace. Lathering his hair with shampoo and combing in thick sweet-smelling conditioner. He loved how human the little things made him feel.  
  
Bucky walked into Amy’s room towelling down his hair. He was hoping she would help him dry and put his up, so he was presentable. If she didn’t have time, he would bug Nat.  
  
Amy was kneeling facing away from her dressing table. Her hair was already done up in a sleek multi-lobed bun. Her eyes were fixed on the dress hanging on the front of her wardrobe. Fingers twined with silver chain.  
  
Bucky followed her eyes to a dress hanging on the rack across from her. “Is this what you’re wearing?” Purple silk with a wide metallic silver belt cinching in the waist. Based on the way it draped on the hanger, it would plunge low in the front and back. With the slit that ran up the front, the dress would show off what Bucky thought was an ideal amount of skin for her, most of it.  
  
Amy nodded. Swinging the pendant of the necklace in her hand like a pendulum. It was a beautiful dress. A masterpiece of modern fashion influenced by classic kimono lines. “I just have to figure out accessories.”  
  
“Doesn’t Fredrick normally send instructions for that sort of thing?” Bucky draped the towel around his shoulders. In the time he’d known her he’d seen her match notes to outfits enough times to think it was a regular thing. Something as fancy as this he’d expect at least a full page of instructions.  
  
“Yeah, but...” Amy wrapped the necklace chain tighter around her fingers. “I don’t know if he’s right this time.”  
  
Bucky sat down with his back against the edge of her dressing table. There was more going on here than just matching fancy dresses to jewellery. “What’s on your mind, baby girl?”  
  
Amy cupped the necklace in her left hand. The jade of her iris glowed against her skin. She had felt so loved the day Steve had given it to her. Like they had a whole life ahead of them. “Would you really have been okay with Steve marrying Peggy?”  
  
Bucky blew out a long stream of air. That was a hard question to answer now that he got to have Steve in his bed every night. Now that Steve could marry _him_. He let his head fall back, studying the ceiling and his heart at the same time. More than seventy years and he didn’t think his answer had changed. Not really. His circumstances had changed. But if they hadn’t... “Yeah I would have been. I would have helped him buy the ring. Talked him down when he freaked out about asking her. Stood up for him at the wedding. I would have been Godfather to their children. I would have been happy because he was happy. And maybe eventually I would have found a girl who could make that happiness feel real. Because what was the other option?”  
  
Amy nestled her head against his neck. “What does real happiness even feel like?”  
  
Bucky linked her fingers through hers and raised her knuckles to his lips. “A lot like this, I think.”  
  
Amy pulled away letting the necklace swing out of her hand again. She could wear pearls tonight. Or find some other necklace. She had a few options with her.  
  
Bucky fingered the dangling flower. An iris, like her name, the same purple as her eyes, timelessly elegant. Amy was obviously sentimentally attached to it. And equally obviously conflicted. “Steve bought this, didn’t he?”  
  
Amy nodded. Dai had wanted her to get rid of it. The third time he’d caught he staring at its box instead of getting ready for the day, he had pointed out that she could loan it to the Suntory Museum of Art, that it would make an excellent addition to their turn of the century collection. Maybe she should have let him take it. Then she wouldn’t be in this situation.  
  
“You should wear it.” Bucky said. Amy wearing the jewelery he had picked out would make Steve all gooey. Hell, the idea was making Bucky a little gooey himself. She would be beautiful. And she would visibly belong with Steve. With them.   
  
Amy shook her head and set the necklace on the dressing table behind her. “You love each other. The two of you will be happy together.”  
  
“What about you, baby girl?” Bucky picked up the necklace and slipped it over her head. Grateful that the chain was long enough that he could manage it one handed. “Will you be happy?”  
  
Amy stroked the pendant. She would have her friends, and her work, her family, and her life. The only thing she would be losing was something she couldn’t have anyway. “Why wouldn’t I be?”  
  
"Just think about that chance I mentioned, little Fox. You have options." Bucky kissed the side of her head. How could any of them really be happy if one of them was missing? He wouldn’t push her. His little Fox was too skittish for that. He and Steve would just have to keep gently showing her how much they cared. She would see it eventually.  
  
*****  
  
Steve hesitated in the door to Amy’s room. His tie held loose in his hand. He missed getting ready for formal events with her. He felt less ridiculous wearing a suite when Amy looked at him like she couldn’t wait to tear it off him. And he loved watching the dance of her getting dressed. Like this. Full skirt hiked up above her knee, strapping a knife to her perfect calf. “Hey.”  
  
Amy looked up at him. Dropping her skirt back over the leg sheath. Was everyone going to traipse through her room today? At least Steve didn’t look like he was going to try and peer into her soul the way Bucky had. He did look good enough to eat. She loved how he looked in a well fitted suite. Light grey linen, blue stripped shirt, and a tie that perfectly matched his eyes. If she knew her Bucky, someone was going to have a very good night. She’d try to stay out of their way. It shouldn’t be too hard, Nakia and Natasha could probably be coaxed into a late-night drink.  
  
Steve held out the tie. “Would you mind?”  
  
“You’re just trying to make me feel like you need me.” Amy plucked the tie out of his hand. She would always help him when he asked.  
  
Steve set his hands on her waist. Holding her at just the right distance for her to tie his tie. Maybe a little closer than where she would have stood naturally. “I do need you.”  
  
Amy tried to resist the smile that wanted to spread across her face. It would be nice to be needed the way he meant. He didn’t need her that way, but the thought was nice. “Chin up, you big softie.”  
  
“You look lovely tonight.” Steve stroked the silk of Amy’s dress. She looked lovely every night, but there was something special tonight. Maybe it was the way her necklace glowed against her skin.  
  
Amy blushed and smoothed the fall of the tie. He was staring She shouldn’t have worn the necklace. It was too late to change it now. “Frederick out did himself.”  
  
“No. The dress is beautiful. But there’s something about you.” Steve cupped her face. Her makeup was light tonight. Sharp black eyeliner and a bold red lip, but the rest was all her. The light in her eyes, the softness of her skin under his fingers. Those were her. As beautiful now as first thing in the morning or when she was fresh from the shower. “You’re... Luminous.”  
  
“Luminous?” Amy raised an eyebrow. What next? A sonnet about her eyes?  
  
Steve laughed and dropped his hands. “Leave me alone, I’m not good at talking to girls.”  
  
“What are you good at?” Amy teased. She tweaked his pocket square, so it sat a little higher. If this outfit didn’t get Steve laid there was no help for her boys. She would have made them late showing him how much liked it if they were still a thing.  
  
Steve liked the way those eyes were watching him. “People tell me I give an excellent inspirational speech.”  
  
Amy smirked. Inspirational enough to make people commit treason for him, and he knew it. “You do, but your flirting needs work.”  
  
Steve traced the curve of the chain around her neck. There were only a handful of people he liked flirting with. Most of the time it seemed like a waste of time. With Amy, or Bucky, or even Peggy, it felt like a fun game. The sort of thing you played at, the same way they played chess or go. Playing games with Amy was one of the things he missed the most. Not just the flirting. Chess, and go, and capture the flag, all the light ways she made him sure he stayed sharp without reminding him how dark the world could be. “This girl I know was going to help me learn, but I think she got distracted.”  
  
“Did she?” Amy smiled at the memory. Things between them used to be fun. Back before everything got complicated. “Well it is a very good thing you are dating an expert now, isn’t it?”  
  
“Yeah. I miss her though.” Steve said softly. She hadn’t moved away. That had to count for something. “She had the most beautiful smile. It was...”  
  
“Luminous?” Amy suggested. He didn’t really need any help. When he put his mind to it, he was a brilliant flirt.  
  
Steve smoothed a flyaway back into her bun with a brush of his fingertips. “That’s as good a word as any.”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky whistled when Steve and Amy appeared in the living room. Now there was a pair of beautiful people. He felt almost under dressed in his dark blue suite. The grey silk shirt under it was open at the throat. He couldn’t be bothered fighting with a tie one handed. Natasha had done a good job with his hair at least, the top knot she’d put in was sleek and clean. Vainly, he thought it was good look on him, that it made his jaw stand out. “Looking good.”  
  
“Am I standing in front of a mirror again?” Steve grinned and wrapped an arm around Bucky’s shoulders. That mischievous smile was the reason he’d been the bane of fathers all over Brooklyn back in the day. Steve liked being on the receiving end.  
  
“I’m feeling a little neglected over here.” Natasha said resisting the urge to laugh at the sappy boys. Now if Amy would just unbend enough to be sappy with them, Nat could relax and be confident that her _Otets_ was happy and protected.  
  
“Are you ever not breath taking?” Amy asked linking their arms. Nat was particularly stunning in her elaborately pleated gown. Knife sharp pleats spread like sun rays over the bodice and skirt. Silver was a good colour on Nat. It made the green in her eyes shine.  
  
Nat tossed her short bob, setting her long art deco earrings swinging. “That’s true.”  
  
Bucky smiled. Raising _Ryzhevolosaya Decochka_ was by far the best thing he had done in his life. He hadn’t even done that much, just helped keep her alive long enough for her to spread her wings. He kissed the top of her head like she was still the little girl he had carried through the snow all those years ago. “You are the most glorious creature. Inside and out. Never doubt that.”  
  
Natasha looked up at him affectionately. Her family was safe. Scattered to the wind. But they were all safe. “And never show weakness?”  
  
“No. You can show weakness to your family. Show them where you’re weak and let them make you stronger.” Bucky kissed her forehead again. “You are so strong, my darling daughter.”  
  
*****  
  
The party was already in full swing when the little group arrived. Clusters of guests laughed and chatted, clearly amused by what for them was a very strangely themed party. Drinks flowed and platters of finger food never seemed to empty. The ballroom had been decorated with swags of greenery and tall vases full of feathers and more greenery. Protea and African iris added splashes of red and pink to the displays. A curtain of anthurium flowers filled the door to the balcony. 1940’s dance hall jazz vibrated off the walls. Amy and Nat drifted in arm in arm, Steve and Bucky two steps behind them.  
  
Bucky grinned around the room. It was perfect. He had to wonder if the choice of music was going to give the game away. He clamped down on his expression when he caught sight of Amy’s bemused inspection. If she thought this was all for her, she wouldn’t let herself enjoy the evening. The last thing he wanted was for her to spend the night stressing about what this _meant_. It meant he and Steve wanted her to be happy, there was nothing complicated about it.  
  
A bouncing Shuri distracted Amy before she could call Steve and Bucky out, dragging her off to talk to the head of the merchant tribe. Bucky tweaked her skirt affectionately as she left, earning him a more affectionate quirk of her painted lips. He grinned and winked, gathering Natasha under his arm and towing the party away from where Amy was working and towards the bar. Let the wild creature be free and she’ll come back to you, it was a lesson he and Steve needed to learn fast and well if they wanted to keep their little Fox smiling.  
  
The three of them got drinks at the bar. A bright pink thing for Natasha, bright citrusy beers for Steve and Bucky. Steve tried not to watch Amy too closely, but he couldn’t help his eyes from following her at least part of the time. In his defence he wasn’t the only one. She could be hypnotic when she wanted to be.  
  
Nakia waved Nat over to introduce her to some friends, leaving Steve and Bucky alone by the bar.  
  
Steve leaned his back against the bar, half listing to Bucky expound on animal husbandry, while he tracked Amy’s progress around the party. It was different from when she had been his date at fancy parties. She wasn’t orbiting him this time. She was completely unmoored.  
  
Bucky elbowed him in the ribs. “Have you heard a word I said in the last two minuets?”  
  
“What?” Steve blinked, he hadn’t. He’d known Bucky was talking, but it had been a low relaxed kind of talking, small talk about his plans for the farm, talking to fill the space, and Amy’s earrings kept catching the light when she laughed.  
  
“You always were an idiot in love.” Bucky chuckled leaning forward on his elbow. “What’s she doing? We can’t both stare.”  
  
Steve grinned. He might have gotten caught, but Bucky wanted to do the exact same thing. “Just talking to some members of the Mining Tribe.”  
  
“I don’t know that that’s more interesting than my chicken story.” Bucky snorted into his beer.  
  
“She’s prettie—” Steve’s face fell as quickly as the smile had appeared. “Shit.”  
  
Bucky lowered his glass slowly. That wasn’t promising. “What?”  
  
Steve set his glass down hand shaking. Someone needed to rescue Amy, and he didn’t think he was the right person. “You need to go ask Amy to dance. Bump into her. Something.”  
  
“Do I want to know why?” Bucky raised an eyebrow quizzically. If he turned around and the problem was Amy talking to a guy, he and Steve were going to have words his jealous ass would not enjoy. Amy was _their_ little Fox, it would take more than a pretty Wardog batting chocolate eyes at her to change that.  
  
“Shuri just handed her a glass of champagne.” Steve closed his fist to stop his hand shaking.  
  
Now Bucky was just confused. Nothing in that sentence warranted any kind of worry, let alone the kind of drastic intervention Steve was suggesting. “Oh no?”  
  
“Amy doesn’t do champagne.” Steve bit his lip when Bucky stayed looking bat him quizzically. He knew it wasn’t enough information. But she had given him a rare piece of her heart when she had told him, and it had been their last night together before everything had gone wrong. He didn’t know how she would feel about him sharing the confession even with Bucky. She didn’t share her weaknesses with people lightly. “Someone waterboarded her with it once. Maybe more than once. I don’t know. She doesn’t like to talk about it.”  
  
Bucky set down his glass before he broke it. Whoever had done it, it had happened before he had been around to protect her. He could at least protect her from her own stubbornness now. “On it.”  
  
Steve grabbed Bucky’s arm. “Don’t tell her I told you.”  
  
Bucky nodded again. He understood. That was the kind of torture people saved for victims they were intimate with. Telling Steve had probably been a huge moment of vulnerability for her. Steve was breaking her trust, even if he was only telling Bucky, and only so they could help her. He wouldn’t tell on Steve. Not tonight. Not when his people were doing such a good job of not fighting over stupid things lately.  
  
There were fifty feet of open ballroom between Bucky and Ayame. He could run that in less that five second. He took a full thirty to carefully navigate the outside of the room, so it didn’t look like his was swooping to save her. He waited patiently for an opening in her conversation with Shuri. Now that he knew what he was looking at he wondered how anyone could miss her reaction to champagne. She was holding it like it was an angry venomous snake. Bucky snuck a look at Steve. Steve was watching Amy’s glass like he thought it was going to explode.  
  
He gave up waiting for an opening. His girl needed rescuing now. And so did his boy.  
  
Bucky plucked the champagne flute out of Amy’s fingers and draped his arm around her shoulders. “Sorry to butt in. I have a brain thing.”  
  
Amy sighed but made no attempt to take the glass back. Any other drink she might try for, but Bucky could steal her champagne anytime. “I keep telling you, you can’t just keep using that as an excuse for poor-“  
  
Bucky cut her off. He used to be good at flirting, he still was most of the time, as long as it was with Amy or Steve. “Do you want to dance?”  
  
“What?” Amy blinked at him. She hadn’t been expecting an invitation.  
  
“Dance.” Bucky set the champagne on a nearby table and offered Amy his hand. “Do you want to? With me, in case that wasn’t clear. I haven’t danced since ‘45. Used to like it. I want to find out if I still do.”  
  
“I...” Amy shook her head. She didn’t know why she was hesitating. She loved dancing, and Bucky seemed so excited by the idea. How could she say no? “Why not. I’ll dance with you.”  
  
“That’s my girl.” Bucky kissed her cheek before shooting a quick wink at Shuri. “Princess. Don’t worry, if I’m still any good at this I’ll take you for a spin later.”  
  
Amy laughed as Bucky slipped his arm around her waist and pulled her onto the dance floor. They fell into rhythm easily. The strains of vintage music stirred Amy’s blood. She leaned into his hold. She loved a dancing partner who knew what he was doing. It was a surprisingly rare talent. Bucky knew what he was doing. He moved to the music like he was born to it.  
  
Three songs passed with them dancing together naturally. Bucky was pleased to discover that Amy was willing to let herself be led on the dancefloor. In fact, she was good enough at reading her partner’s intent that he hardly missed his second arm. She would follow his eyes as much as the pressure from the hand on her back, or, when he was feeling bolder, the hand he slipped into hers so he could twirl her or dance her around in some fancier steps. That weightless grace and effortless special awareness she brought to her fighting, translated to the art better than Bucky could have hoped. The two of them could have won any dance competition they came across back in the day.  
  
He caught Steve watching them and winked at him. They had to look amazing like this. He wondered if he could talk Steve into drawing or painting them. He’d like to have a sketch of this to put up in the bedroom.  
  
The fourth song was slower. Bucky swept Amy in a lazy circle. “This hasn’t answered my question at all. I don’t know if I like dancing, or just holding you. Do you think we need a control?”  
  
“You hold me all the time.” Amy glared at him through her eyelashes. It was a problem really. One that had only gotten worse since she had slept with them the second time. It was hard to say no when he needed her though. Even harder to stop herself rubbing against him like a cat when he looked at her with those bedroom eyes.  
  
“Not nearly enough.” Bucky purred in her ear. He slid his hand lower. The dress was pretty, but the next time they danced it would be in the kitchen. With Amy in one of her filmy robes, something clingy and easy to push up. He’d skip wearing a shirt. He wondered how many songs they would get through before Steve broke and carried them off to the bedroom. He’d put his money on three.  
  
“Bucky.” Amy aimed for exasperated, but Bucky crushed her against him in a quick turn, and it ended up more breathless.  
  
Bucky kept her close like that pressed against him from sternum to knee as he waltzed them around for a few more bars. He wondered what would happen if he kissed her right now would she soften and melt against him? Or would she meet his challenge with one of her own? Or, and he thought it was the outside chance, but he couldn’t completely discount it, would he scare her off and send her skittering away to hide again?  
  
Bucky rested his head on her hair. He was a sniper. Waiting was what he did best. He would out last her. And when she was ready. When she decided she wanted to kiss them. He would be there. He felt Amy sigh and lean into his chest. He didn’t think he’d have to wait that much longer.


	57. Happy Birthday Baby Girl

Steve leaned against the edge of a table and swirled his drink thoughtfully. Sending Bucky had been a good idea. Amy was laughing as Bucky whirled her around. He doubted he would have been able to pull off such a smooth rescue. Given his recent track record, his attempt would probably have ended with a screaming match and him getting a drink dumped over his head.  
  
Watching Bucky dance with a pretty girl was very familiar feeling. Steve had spent almost every weekend from the time he was sixteen until Bucky left for the war sitting by the dancefloor trying to be invisible. He didn’t have to be invisible anymore. The little winks Bucky shot him anytime they caught each others’ eyes had a more flirtatious flavour too them now. Or maybe Bucky had always used his bedroom eyes and Steve had just missed it for years. This girl, his Amy, was looking at him too, at least some of the time. When he found her eyes she would drop them, look away, and if she wasn't blushing, it was sheer force of will.  
  
Steve finished the last of his drink with a sigh. He loved them both so much. He just wished he knew if he was doing the right thing with them. He didn’t want to give either of them up, but was that fair? Should he tell Amy to go home, let her live her life? Should he let them both go, let them be with each other? Or should he keep going with what he and Bucky had been doing and try to make the three of them work? Wanting the three of them to work was so selfish, but it was what Bucky wanted too, and Amy… Amy was completely unreadable. She had nuzzled into his chest this morning, a lot of mornings, and the few times they had all fooled around together… those fireworks had to mean something. Bucky kept insisting they just needed to give her time. But how much time?  
  
“Captain.” T’Challa appeared at Steve’s shoulder and passed him a new drink.  
  
Steve accepted the drink with an appreciative nod. “You’re majesty.”  
  
T’Challa leaned back next to Steve, watching what he was watching. “They make a handsome pair.”  
  
Bucky pulled Amy close to him on the dancefloor, his lips against her ear. Steve’s heart fluttered. “They do.”  
  
“You are a lucky man Captain.” T’Challa said, smiling at Nakia dancing with a member of the River Tribe.  
  
“I’d like to think I am.” Madly in love with two beautiful amazing people. Steve took a long sip of his drink. He was either very lucky, or very unlucky. It didn’t really matter either way, they were what mattered. “Thanks for this.”  
  
T’Challa laughed into his glass. “You try saying no to my sister. Apparently, it is 'totally adorable' how hard you all work to make each other happy.”  
  
Steve snapped his head around to face the king. If Shuri and her brother saw it too, that meant it wasn’t all in his head. That he wasn’t just imagining that they were working. “You think they’re happy?”  
  
T’Challa clapped Steve warmly on the shoulder. “I do.”  
  
Steve watched Bucky twirl Amy, her skirt tangling around their legs. He thought they were happy too. Or at least they could be.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky traced the line of Amy’s jaw, tipping her face up so she was looking at him with her big soft eyes. He loved those bright eyes, that violet that meant home and safety the way nothing else did. His brain was telling him to kiss her. Not just kiss her. Throw her over his shoulder and carry her off like a caveman. His little Fox was a lady. He couldn’t go all barbarian on her if he wanted this to work. Be patient. He just had to keep reminding himself to be patient.  
  
Bucky dipped his head, pressing his lips against hers softly. Amy had too much harshness in her life. They had to be soft with her. “Happy birthday baby girl.”  
  
Amy took a half step back. He was a good kisser. She would even describe it as swoon worthy. And those eyes. Intense. Fierce. Too focused on her. She licked her lips. It would be easy to press back against him and let those eyes do what they wanted to. Easy didn’t mean it was a good idea. Especially right now. This night wasn’t all about enjoying herself. “I should… I should uh…”  
  
Bucky slid his hand down her arm until he was holding just the tips of her fingers. His girl was a feral thing, just like he was, she would bite any hand that held her too tight. So, her boys would hold her loosely and she would get used to the idea of being loved. He was getting used to it. It was fucking great. He gave Amy’s hand one last kiss before extending his arm to set her free. “Go do your job, baby girl. You know where to find us.”  
  
*****  
  
Steve chuckled as Bucky slipped his arm around him from behind. He would never get used to how easy it was for Bucky and Amy to sneak up on him. And he would never stop being delighted by the sudden bursts of affection it allowed them.  
  
Bucky had danced with Shuri and Nat after he left Amy at the edge of the dance floor. He had even taken the Queen Mother out for a quick foxtrot. He was a good partner for all of them, but none of them had had the same effortless feel that him dancing with Amy had. Steve realised he might be slightly biased in the matter. He shot a quick look at Amy, deep in conversation with the chief of the River Tribe. It was nice to see them both put their skills to a nonviolent purpose.  
  
“I can’t decide if I want to tear your clothes off or just fall asleep on top of you.” Bucky purred nuzzling the back of Steve’s neck. He was in love. He was pretty sure he and Steve had managed to pull off a good birthday for their girl. But he was dead tired.  
  
Steve turned around, setting his hands on Bucky’s hips. “Why don’t we do one and then the other.”  
  
Bucky made a needy noise and leaned against Steve’s chest. One then the other sounded great. It sounded like everything he wanted from the rest of his life. There was just one problem with that plan tonight… maybe two, but one he would admit to. “Amy will be pissed if we get the sheets all sweaty and sticky before she sleeps on them.”  
  
Steve smiled and took a little more of Bucky’s weight. He was pretty sure that was code for ‘I want to fuck you into the mattress but I’m going to pass out if I don’t get some sleep'... Although Amy would be irritated by dirty sheets. “We’ll swap the order then. That way we can wash the sheets before she has to sleep on them again. She might even help us get them dirty in the morning.”  
  
Bucky pressed lazy open mouth kisses down Steve’s neck. He hoped Amy would join them in the morning. It was her birthday. This party was fun, but he hoped they would get a chance to show her how much they cared. She didn't trust words, they could give her better than words. “That’s why they made you an officer. Always thinking.”  
  
“Nah.” Steve shifted. Bucky was resting a lot of body weight on him. Enough that Steve wondered if he would have to carry Bucky to bed. “They made me an officer because the other option was court-martialling me, and my mug was already on the posters.”  
  
Bucky groaned and forced himself to stand up on his own. “Go tell little Fox we’re leaving and then take me to bed, you punk.”  
  
*****  
  
Amy was at the centre of a knot of Chiefs, including M’baku and Nakia’s father. She was in the middle of a story, one punctuated with broad graceful gestures and much laughter. Steve was reminded vividly of watching her dance in Japan, but he couldn’t place why. He’d watched Amy win people over at parties before, but not like this. Before she had always been playing a part. This was Ayame. Brighter than sunlight on snow. A goddess to the core.  
  
“Sorry to interrupt.” Steve set his hand on the small of Amy’s back. Not possessively just to make sure she knew he was there. She looked up at him curiously and he curled his fingers into the silk of her dress just a little. “Bucky and I are going to call it. You’re good?”  
  
Amy squeezed his arm. It was a late night for Bucky. Tomorrow would be rough if he didn’t get some sleep. “I’ll be up in a bit.”  
  
Steve ducked down and kissed her cheek. She was magnificent when she was working. He could see that when he wasn’t being a jealous ass. “Happy birthday, sweetheart.”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky stirred as the mattress depressed next to him. Amy finally coming to bed. He rolled over and pulled her in to be his little spoon, arm wrapping under her arm and across her chest to her other shoulder. Warmth spread through him as she sleepily nuzzled his fingers. His sense of contentment grew as Steve curled himself around both of them. He was more than safe here. He was loved. Deeply and from all sides. Soft warm breath on the back of his neck lulled him back to sleep.  
  
*****  
  
Fingers combed through Amy’s hair, long slow strokes. The fingers snagging on the remnants of hairspray still gluing some of the strands together. When they snagged, they stopped and carefully worked the knot free. Dimly, Amy’s brain told her she should have showered and washed her hair last night. It had been late, she had been tired, and bed with the boys had been too much of a temptation. Amy rolled over and found her face pressed into Bucky’s hip.  
  
The hand stilled. “Morning beautiful.”  
  
“We didn’t mean to wake you up.”  
  
Amy struggled towards wakefulness. Steve’s voice sounded close. He must be in the bed too, but something was off about the orientation of everything.  
  
“It was time.” Amy rubbed her face. As good as it felt Bucky shouldn’t be able to stroke her hair like this. She always slept on his left side, so he had his arm free to hold Steve. He put a pillow there to stop her from getting lines on her face. At least she started the night on his left. She didn’t always end up there. But she had been getting better about not chasing warm arms in her sleep. Damn these pretty boys and the way they made her feel too safe. They were in entirely the wrong order. “How did I end up on this side of the bed?”  
  
“I got up to feed the goats, you weren’t done cuddling. There was some... shifting.” Bucky chuckled and started stroking her hair again. “You kind of mauled Steve to get him to hold you.”  
  
“I’m sorry. You should have just rolled me away, or something.” Amy blushed and waved distractedly. She wasn’t doing a better job of not chasing them. They were doing a better job of not waking her up when she did.  
  
Steve caught her hand. Kissed her knuckles. Then set it back down on Bucky’s chest. “I like cuddling you. I just wasn’t ready because I was half out of bed to let Bucky get up.”  
  
“I’ll... Umm... I'll...” Amy stuttered. She curled her hand into a loose fist but didn’t pull it away. They were both looking at her now. Their eyes made her too warm. Didn’t they realise she was in the way? How could they sit wrapped around each other and still look at her at her like that?  
  
Bucky curled a chunk of her hair around his finger. He knew that look. That was her running away look. Last night had been too good to waste by running away now. “Don’t get up now. I came back to bed so I could sit with both of you. You're right where you belong, baby girl.”  
  
Amy shifted her head into his lap and curled her hand around his knee. If he really wanted her to stay, she could stay for a little while. “What are we reading?”  
  
“Lord of the Rings. The hobbits are just leaving the Shire.” Steve said reaching across Bucky to tuck the disturbed piece of her hair back behind her ear. How that one piece always slipped free he would never know, but he loved the excuse to touch her.  
  
“Go on then.” Amy closed her eyes again. She should get up and leave them to their bonding. Bucky looked so sweet with his head on Steve’s shoulder, and Steve seemed so peaceful with a hand on Bucky’s thigh. But she was still tired, and Steve’s voice was like honey. If they started kissing, she would slip away. For now, she would stay and enjoy the morning. Warm in bed with her boys. Bucky providing sarcastic commentary to Steve’s narration... It was her birthday after all. She deserved a treat.  
  
The hobbits were in Bree. Worried about black riders in a naive sort of way, more worried about 'Strider' and his gruff manners. Amy could feel Bucky getting restless next to her. She shifted out of his lap so he could get up if he wanted to.  
  
He seemed to take that as permission to move, shoving the blankets off his legs. “I’m getting coffee. Baby girl?”  
  
“Green tea, if you don’t mind.” Amy pressed herself into the bed so he could roll over her.  
  
“Anything for you.” Bucky ran a finger down her neck. Exactly the way he knew made her shiver with anticipation. She was so pretty when she did that. Steve saw it too from the way his pupils had just dilated. “Steve?”  
  
“Coffee for me.” Steve made long eye contact with Bucky. He was teasing Amy to tease him, and it was definitely working.  
  
Bucky took one more warm look at them before he left for the kitchen. He loved these people so much. They all deserved this perfect peaceful moment.  
  
Amy rolled onto her back with a sigh. Now that she was awake and thinking, her stomach was gurgling. Maybe tea had been a bad idea. Maybe she should have asked for something more mellow. Like coconut water. Or a handful of dry crackers. This waking up feeling sick thing was getting old. She hoped at some point her body would fully adjust to the new rate she was using her powers at and stop doing this too her all together.  
  
“Your stomach upset again, sweetheart?” Steve asked shifting closer to her in the bed. He worried about her. At least she was finally getting some sleep. She wore herself out looking after them.  
  
“Just a little. It will pass.” This was especially unfair. She hadn’t even had anything to drink last night, hoping that would help mitigate her symptoms.  
  
Steve felt her forehead. It was odd that she was still sick so often. Bucky was doing a lot better since Shuri dealt with the nick in his brainstem. They really only needed her to use her powers to get through one of Bucky’s procedures or when one of them was having a particularly bad night. “Did Bucky wake you up and I missed it?”  
  
“No.” Amy ran a hand over her stomach. Mornings had actually gotten better in the last month. She wasn’t throwing up anymore, everything was just vaguely unsettled. Consistent use of her powers was probably improving her ability to regulate. “I think it is more of a muscle memory thing. I've been using my powers so much lately; my body is just used to being sick in the morning. A few more weeks like this one and I'll be back to normal.”  
  
“If you’re sure.” Steve didn’t sound convinced. Being sick all the time couldn’t be good for her. At least she was finally starting to look like she wasn’t starving to death, even if she was still thinner than he thought was strictly healthy. Someone should start plying her with smoothies and food the way Dai did when she was overworking herself. And by someone he meant himself. "We'll see if we can't go easy on you for a bit."  
  
Amy smoothed the blanket between them. If anything was making her stomach feel weird it was Steve looking at her like that. Butterflies did not help with eating first thing in the morning. “You don’t have to worry about me.”  
  
Steve tucked her hair behind her ear, tipping her face up to his in the process. He pressed a gentle kiss into her lips. “I always worry about the people I care about. It’s one of the ways I show affection.”  
  
Bucky smiled at the pair as he eased his way back into the room. A tray full of mugs balance in his hand. They made a pretty picture and he knew exactly where he fit into it.  
  
“Budge up. I want to hear what happens with this Strider guy.” Bucky tucked himself behind Amy and wiggled until she was pressed against Steve’s shoulder and half in his lap.  
  
Steve wrapped his arm around them both and picked the book back up. “He’s great in the movies. Let’s see if he’s any good in the books.”  
  
Amy smiled and tucked her head against Bucky’s neck. Steve would like book Aragorn even better than he liked the character in the movies. She loved watching them read together. The way they devoured all the new books and information they could get their hands on. It was even better tucked between them like this. All warm from the press of bodies on either side. Feeling as much as hearing the deep rumble of Bucky’s comments and questions. The way Steve’s side bumped against hers when he laughed. Even the way she had to duck down a little so they could exchange quick kisses over her head when they caught each other’s eyes. She didn’t feel too bad about staying as long as they kept doing that. As long as they were short flirty things. And the little squeeze they gave her every time they kissed was nice. So was the way Bucky nosed her ear after half of them.  
  
Steve managed to drink his coffee slowly over the next couple hours. Balancing the book on his knees so he could grab a sip between paragraphs and kisses. He wished he was daring enough for some of those kisses to be with Amy, but she ducked her head out of the way every time he turned towards her. Not that Bucky seemed to mind the extra kisses. Even if Steve could see an amused glint in his eyes like he knew what Steve was thinking.  
  
Aragorn and the hobbits were deep in the wilderness the next time there was a disturbance. The tiniest creak outside in the hall.  
  
Bucky and Amy's heads both snapped towards the door.  
  
Natasha stood there. Phone in hand.  
  
“Nat?” Steve asked when he saw what had drawn their attention.  
  
Nat pocketed her phone. The picture had totally come out. She had proof that the three of them were perfect together. Exactly the sort of thing she would need the next time Steve or Amy had a freak out. “Sorry to interrupt. It’s Geneva.”  
  
Steve looked at the couple curled next to him. He hated to leave them like this. But Geneva was where they thought the Hydra agent that had blown up Wanda and the scientist he was protecting. “Sorry sugars. Looks like I’ve got to go to work.”  
  
“Be safe.” Bucky curled his hand around the back of Steve’s neck. “Come back to me. To us.”  
  
“Always, Buck.” Steve kissed Bucky. He looked at Amy, still tucked against Bucky’s side with her fierce protective eyes. He ducked down and kissed her too. “Love you, sweetheart. Take care of our boy until I get back.”


	58. Separation Anxiety

The sun was starting to set. Bucky sighed and collapsed onto the couch next to Amy. That meant another night without Steve. The fifth in a row. He had tried to wear himself out on the farm. But all that had done was left him physically tired without really distracting his mind. He hated when either of them went away. He knew his people. They were absolute danger magnets. At least Amy was safe. For now. Who knew how long it would be before she ran off and got herself into trouble.

Amy fluffed a hand through his hair without looking up from the email she was reading. “Relax, _Mon Loupe_. He'll be fine.”

Bucky leaned against her side. Breathing in the smoky sweet scent of her. At least she was safe. Even if no one else was. “You can’t know that.”

“He’s Steve. He's always fine.” She set aside her computer so she could look at him properly. He his cuticles we ragged. There were dark circles under his eyes. Bucky was worrying. Not that she wasn’t worrying. She was just better at hiding it.

What they both needed was a quiet night that would let them relax. She kissed his temple. “Do you want to watch something? I can make us tea.”

Bucky sat back so he could look at her. He did. As long as it was with her, he did. Anything they did together would be comforting to him. He wasn’t the only one who could use some comfort tonight. She put on a brave face, but he didn’t think his girl wasn’t as okay as she pretended to be. He hadn’t missed the fact that there had been a map and tracker up in the corner of her screen all week. Or the shaking nightmare she'd had last night, even I she hadn't woken up when he pulled her into his chest and stroked her hair until it passed. “What do you want to do, baby girl? How are you holding up?”

Amy smiled and combed her fingers through his hair. “I’m fine. I’m always fine too.”

Bucky caught her hand, pressing his lips to her wrist. The pulse there was slow and steady, which was something at least. “Promise?”

Amy rolled her eyes and shoved off the couch. “Pick a movie while I put the kettle on, you flirt.”

They curled together on the couch. Two mugs of tea and a plate of cookies on the table in front of them. Amy tucked into the corner by the arm of the couch, her legs across Bucky’s lap. Bucky stroked her calf as bubbly music played. But he was still worried. So was she. He could feel it in the tensing of her muscles.

That was exactly why he had chosen a good old-fashioned musical. Bright colours, bouncy songs, and nothing really bad happening to anyone. They would relax... They would be distracted at any rate. He hit play, starting the pastoral people on their trans-Atlantic journey.

Bucky spent half his time watching the movie and the other half watching Amy’s smooth features for the near invisible flickers that gave away her thoughts. He could read a lot there in an hour and a half with her in his arms. Like exactly how often her eyes drifted to the tracker now showing on the upturned screen of her phone. Or how much she watched him back. He leaned over to kiss her temple and settled deeper into the pillows. They would be alright. She would be alright.

Amy kept her attention firmly fixed on the screen. She wasn’t generally a Monroe fan. The saccharine sweet storylines tended to bore her, and the acting always felt stilted. The effect was softened by Bucky stroking her shin and the low chuckles he let out when something tickled his fancy. Or maybe it was the tender way he kept looking at her. There was a certain perfection to the way he worried and looked after her without acting like she was a delicate flower in need of rescue.

The screen, the heroines descended a grand staircase dressed in matching white dresses. Both beaming with joy at their futures.

“Stupid.” Amy muttered. She had forgotten how this one ended.

“Baby girl?” Bucky’s brow furrowed. He’d thought it was rather sweet. A double wedding for the couples who had been through so much. They’d proven they could make it through worse, why shouldn’t they be together for better?

“They shouldn’t get married. They hardly know each other. And look at what has happened in the last—what? Two weeks?” Amy’s nose scrunched in distaste. It wasn’t like Amy was unromantic. But not like that. Not rushed weddings or sudden grandly romantic proposal romantic. They were too manipulative. They didn’t give any room for nuance, or negotiation. They demanded an immediate and performative answer. She liked her romantic gestures small. A private gift here. A quietly supportive presence there. “That’s not a foundation for a life together. What if he snores, or she leaves her socks on the floor? They have to live together, not just survive huge one-off events. Why are people in these things never practical?”

Bucky chuckled low in his throat. Little Fox was one to talk when it came to big romantic life decisions. “You did give up most of your life and moved halfway around the world so they guy you love could be with someone else.”

Amy shook her head. She had. Because she was reckless and in love with both of them. Which she didn’t want to talk about. Bucky had a bad habit of getting her to say things she wouldn’t normally confess to. 

“Should I put on another one?” Amy asked, even as she cued up the next film. It was still to early for bed, and while she didn’t want to have the conversation Bucky was angling for, she also didn’t want to leave his lap.

Bucky ignored her question. Avoiding their feeling wasn’t working. He couldn’t ignore her trying to hide from them. “He loves you so much, baby girl.”

“I wish he didn’t. This would all be so much easier if it was unrequited.” Amy closed her eyes, the heat of Bucky’s hand burning into her leg. She had experience with unrequited love. From the other side. But experience. Unfortunately, she also knew exactly what it looked like when someone was only in love with the fantasy of her. This wasn’t that. For all she wanted to put Steve and Bucky in the same box as all her conquests, she couldn’t.

Bucky tucked a finger under her chin, tipping her head back to find her face. “But it is. Deeply, truly, completely requited.”

Amy shifted so she wasn’t looking into those too silver eyes. It would be so much easier to be able to put them in the box, wrap them up and shove them in some out of the way corner where she didn’t have to think about them. Write them off a long with all the guys who discounted her for one reason or another. The ones who thought she was all looks, or that her combat skills were all for show, or that her academic work was plagiarised. Who wanted her to cook, and clean, and be ‘the total package’. Who expected her to laugh at their jokes and be smaller than she was. They refused at every turn. Steve talked strategy with her as equals. Bucky watched her train with stars in his eyes. They were both more than alright with handling the cooking. Steve proofread her papers and reports. Bucky made her laugh. And they didn’t expect her to be alright. She could have bad days. Angry days or quiet ones. And all that would happen was Steve offering to be her punching bag, or Bucky curling up with his head in her lap. She trusted them enough to fall asleep in their arms. And they repaid her trust by chasing away the nightmares. 

And she still didn’t trust them enough to believe any of it would last if they saw how broken she really was. “Watch the movie.”

Bucky closed his eyes and breathed her in instead. Steady stable there for her. That was what she needed. He could handle that. “We’re yours. And we’re not going anywhere.”

“Movie.” Amy hissed, nestling deeper in his lap. Whispered in her ear like that. She could just about believe him.

Bucky tightened his hold on her. “I loved Steve for almost eighty years, little Fox. Give me the chance, and we can challenge that record.”

“Till the sun burns out in the sky?” While she packed her voice with derision, it was a genuine question.

“Longer. No matter what.” Bucky promised himself as much as her. Even if this didn’t work. Even if she left. He would still love her. Love her and miss her more than he missed his arm.

*****

A new pair of beautiful people fell into each other’s arms, their pot of tea was gone, Bucky felt Amy's breathing and heartrate slow. He couldn’t help smiling. He knew she had been lying about how much sleep she had been getting the last few days. His little Fox was exhausted. An early night was just what she needed. Probably what he needed too. He settled on watching one more episode to make sure she was really down, then he would carry her to bed and spend the rest of the night as her big spoon. “I love you too, little Fox. Every crazy reluctant inch of you.”  
  
The door to the suite squeaked. Bucky's head snapped around.  
  
Steve.  
  
Bucky leapt to his feet. Steve looking like he’d been dragged backwards through hell. Dirt and ash smeared his face. There was a tear in the sleeve of his jacket exposing a biceps covered in road rash. The part that worried Bucky most was his leg. His pants were shredded, and he had a blood-stained bandage around his calf. “What the hell happened to you?”  
  
“Ten Rings is trying to get back into the WMD business. We were intercepting a major shipment.” Steve groaned and lowered himself into a chair. He hoped Amy would help him out of his mission gear. He didn’t think he’d be able to bend over for a few hours and he needed a shower. “I was following their truck on my bike while Sam and Nat circled around in front. Would have been a good plan, only they had a rocket launcher.”  
  
Bucky ran his hand over Steve’s face and shoulders checking for injuries. He fumbled uselessly at the clasp closing Steve’s jacket, unable to get it open one handed.  
  
Eventually Steve took pity on him and opened the clasp so Bucky could move on to checking his ribs. He tipped his head back and continued his story. “Swerved to miss the rocket, but the second one took out the ground in front of me. I ended up completely whipping out. My bike is totalled. Cut my leg down to the bone. Bleed like a motherfucker. I think it has mostly stopped now. At least Sam got the chunk of break disk out. I’m fine otherwise. The suit is designed to handle this sort of thing, and I rolled.  
  
A tiny whimper behind him pulled Bucky’s attention away from the man he loved. Turning to see what it was, his hand dropped away from Steve. There might be a more pressing problem than the guy who healed overnight having a cut leg. “Steve.”  
  
Steve rubbed his eyes. Yes. A warm shower, maybe a hand massage from Amy, then bed with Bucky acting as his pillow. He would be right as rain by morning. “Slapped a bandage over it and ran the rest of the way. I wasn’t going to let them get away again. Not after what those bastards did last time.”  
  
“Steve, shut up for a second.” Bucky snapped.  
  
That made Steve pause. Bucky never snapped at him. “What’s wrong?”  
  
“Amy.” Bucky said starring at his girl crumpled on the couch.  
  
Bucky dropped to his knees in front of Amy. Carefully tipping her head up. Her eyes were glassy. Darting around the room in panic. Their girl was not okay.  
  
He didn’t think this was the first time something like this had happened. Which meant someone would know what to do to help her. Not Steve. He was looking lost and afraid. Frozen in his chair, his own panic obviously growing. He was out of his depth. Nat wasn’t here. Which left- “Where’s your phone, baby girl? I need your phone so I can call Dai.”  
  
With automatic jerky movements, Amy pulled her phone out of her sleeve and pressed it into his hand. Somewhere during the motion, she managed to unlock it.  
  
This was the kind of situation that left Bucky kicking himself for not wearing the arm all the time. Having two hands would make this much easier. How was he supposed to comfort her and work the touch screen? Bucky waved Steve over and made him hold Amy's hand while he found Dai's number. He answered on the second ring. “Amy’s having a panic attack.” Bucky skipped all niceties. He would apologise later if he had to. Right now, they felt like a waste of time.  
  
There was a pause that felt like a century but was probably only a couple of seconds. “Put me on speaker.”  
  
That was the answer of someone who had done this before. Bucky rushed to comply. Amy had been there for him during his attacks. The least he could do was help her now. He ignored the thundering of his own heart. She would be fine.  
  
“It’s me. Are you breathing?” Dai sounded tinny over the phone’s small speaker.  
  
“Yes.” Amy answered. Her eyes had found the phone as soon as Dai had spoken.  
  
“Good. Keep doing that. Five.” Tinny, but steady and calm. The reassuring tones of someone who knew what they were doing.  
  
Amy’s eyes focused and she took in the room. “Floor tiles. A tube of Chapstick. The place where the table meets the floor. The corner of the rug. Blood on Steve’s pants.”  
  
“We’ll come back to that last one. Four.”  
  
Amy let out a long breath. She could do this. “My pants. The couch cushions. The wood of the table leg. Steve’s hand.”  
  
“Better. Three.”  
  
“Birds. Blood in my ears. Bucky breathing.” The blood was very loud. Her heart pounding hard enough that it hurt. Bucky’s breathing was slow and rhythmic. Almost too controlled. If she didn’t know any better, she would have said he was trying to stop himself from panicking with her.  
  
“Just Barnes? Not Rogers?” Dai snapped. “Is Steve dead? I swear if you are kneeling over Steve’s corpse and that idiot didn’t lead with that, I will come over there and kill everyone who isn’t you.”  
  
Something between a sob and a laugh escaped Amy. “He’s alive. He's just not breathing.”  
  
Steve let out his breath with a shaky chuckle. He hadn’t realised he was holding it. “Yeah I’m all right Sweetheart. Takes more than a little scratch to keep me down.”  
  
“I’ll hold off on the murder for now then. Two.” Dai sounded sceptical. Steve was pretty sure he was going to receive the blame for this if Dai ever got a hold of him.  
  
“Steve and Bucky's shampoo. That’s only one. Give me a second.” Amy took three deep breaths through the nose. “Wood polish.”  
  
“You remembered they use the same shampoo. That’s good. You’re thinking. One.”  
  
“Blood.” Amy whispered, voice cracking.  
  
“A different one, Ayame. I’m never looking for that one.”  
  
Bucky recognised the signs of the panic creeping back up in Amy’s shoulders. He tried to remember if he recognised what technique they were using. He had done a lot of research on combating panic attacks when he had been alone. A count down through the senses. Five things she could see, four things she could touch, three things she could hear, two things she could smell. What was one?  
  
Taste. She needed to identify something she could taste. Why could she taste blood? And why did Dai think it didn’t count? Bucky pushed the thoughts aside. She needed something she could taste. Something good. An idea struck him like a jolt of electricity. He leaned forward quickly pressing a hard kiss into her lips before she could react.  
  
Salt, soap, something fruity, and sweet burned sugar. His lips had a distinctive taste all his own. Amy let out a shaky breath. “Bucky.”  
  
“Better. Are you calm?”  
  
“Calmer.” Amy hedged. It would take a little while for her system to full return to normal, but she could function now.  
  
“Are you safe?”  
  
Amy felt Steve and Bucky holding her hands. Neither of them would let anyone hurt her. They were safe in their rooms in Wakanda. Nothing was going to happen to her here. “Yes.”  
  
“Can your boys take it from here or do you want me to stay on the line and go through the stretches?”  
  
“I know the stretches if she says yes.” Bucky said quickly. She had done them with him after enough bad nights. Long slow stretches to keep the tension from setting in.  
  
“My boys have me.” Amy tipped forward so her forehead was pressed against Bucky’s. “I'll call you once I’m together.”  
  
Bucky let go of her hand to rub her leg as reassuringly as he could manage.  
  
“You’d better. That murder is only on hold.”  
  
“Love you Dai.” Amy said softly. She didn’t know where she would be without Dai acting as her rock. Aside from the fact he could bring her back from the edge, she almost certainly would have starved to death years ago.  
  
Dai sighed. Amy knew that sigh. He forgave her for how much she complicated his life. “Love you back.”  
  
*****  
  
Amy stirred, pushing the blanket away from her face. From the weight still pulling down on her limbs, it hadn’t been that long since she fell asleep. Someone had made sure the bedroom curtains were firmly closed, so she couldn’t use the moon to fix a more exact estimate. She wasn’t as sore as she could be. A half hour of stretching with Bucky had helped. She was also warm, tucked between the boys, Bucky’s arm under her head as a pillow. Steve on the other side a warm protective presence. She had told Dai they would look after her, and they had lived up to that promise.  
  
Steve woke up as soon as Amy started to move. He'd been more dozing than really sleeping tonight, propped up on the pillows. He was too worried about his people to sleep. He scooped Amy into lap, ignoring the twinge her weight on her leg caused. “How are you feeling?”  
  
“Stiff and a little sore.” Amy stretched and her neck popped. “I’ll be alright. How’s your leg?”  
  
“I’ll be fine. I’m always fine.” Steve stroked her hair softly. “What caused it? Whatever it is, I won’t do it again… probably. I’ve tried to stop people shooting rockets at me for years and it still hasn’t stuck.”  
  
Amy shook her head, avoiding his eyes. “You’ll do it again. I'll survive. Don’t worry about me.”  
  
Steve tucked a finger under her chin and tipped her head up so he could look at her. That wasn’t an answer. “Amy?”  
  
Amy let out a long shaky breath. It was hard not to bury her face in his chest and just sob for a while. He was okay. She was okay. Even Bucky, still breathing softly behind her, was okay. “It was the bike.”  
  
She curled her fingers into the front of his shirt. “You crashed your motorcycle. You could have died.”  
  
“I’m alright, sweetheart. My leg is almost better already.” Steve stroked his thumb along her cheek. He hated to see her distressed like this. “Does my bike really bother you that much?”  
  
Amy dropped her eyes again. “You love your bike.”  
  
“So yes, but you won’t ask me to give it up.” The corners of her mouth twitched. A tiny movement, but enough to give Steve hope. All he wanted was to see her smile again. He would give up his bike if that was what she needed He tucked her hair behind her ear. “I’m getting better at interpreting your non-answers.”  
  
“I don’t want you to give up the bike for me.” Amy traced the kanji for protection and long life over his heart.  
  
“I will be more careful.” Steve kissed the top of her head. The bike was gone. The one he'd been riding was trashed anyway. Not replacing it was the least he could do for her. He should be more careful in general. He had people to look after.  
  
“What are we doing?” Amy laughed and hid her face in his chest. This was ridiculous. She shouldn’t be here. She was supposed to be getting over her boys not panicking when they got hurt. And she had called them _her_ boys, in front of them. It was going to take weeks of careful distancing to get them back to where they had been. And she really didn’t want to start, at least not tonight.  
  
Steve managed a laugh of his own. He didn’t know either. But he liked it. At least when none of them were freaking out. “Right now? We are cuddling, because you had a rough night and could use the comfort.”  
  
A pair of soft grey eyes appeared over Amy’s shoulder. They were all awake. “Right Buck?”  
  
Bucky curled himself around both of them. He knew what they were doing. They were in love. All three of them. It was as easy or as hard as they made it. Right now, it was easy. He nuzzled Amy’s shoulder. Loving her was easy. Making her smile was more of a challenge in the moment. “Don’t do that again, okay? I’m the mentally unstable one who occasionally breaks down badly enough that they can’t move, you’re then strong silent one, and Steve’s the reckless one, ‘s not fair if you get to steal my bit.”  
  
“I’m sorry Bucky baby. I didn’t mean to worry you. I’m better now.” Amy kissed his head, unable to stop her smile at his gentel teasing. She really did feel better. Safe and cared for. For that matter this was the best she had ever felt after a bad panic attack. Once she’d had a goodnight’s sleep, she would have to brainstorm some ways to recreate the experience for next time. She doubted she would have the boys to look after her when the time came. A large heated and weighted blanket came to mind.  
  
"We'll be alright, sweetheart. We're safe." Steve whispered, kissing her forehead. 


	59. Endorphin Crash

The sparing dummy went down, Amy’s staff smacking its head hard. She whipped it around and brought the other end down on its throat.

“Easy there. He's dead.” Bucky laughed stepping into the room. His girl looked miles better than she had last night. The colour was back in her cheeks. Her eyes were bright. Her hair was still a little more grey than shining white, but it didn’t look lank today, it was probably just the last of the dye.

“Did you want something, Bucky baby?” Amy panted. A long workout was exactly what she had needed this morning.

“Just to see how you were doing. If you needed anything?” He leaned casually against the wall shoving his hand into his pocket.  
  
Amy licked her lips. There was something. A truly terrible idea, but she wanted it. Needed the endorphins and craved the contact. “If I wanted to have sex again. Simple, uncomplicated, no strings attached sex, would that be an option?”  
  
“ _Forgive me Lord, I am a sinner._ ” Bucky muttered in Latin, eyes on the ceiling. It was too much of a temptation. He was weak and mortal and starving for her, and here she was offering him so much of what he wanted.  
  
It had been his plan after her birthday. Coax her into more than bed, show her how he felt before he told her. His love, unquestioned and unwavering, the only thing her really could give her as a birthday present. Then Steve had left in a hurry and neither of them had been in the right place for the gesture.  
  
Steve was back, and reasonably intact. But after yesterday, he’d assumed it would have to wait. Now she was asking. Simply and directly. Not for what Bucky wanted to give her, but for something painfully close. And Bucky had no idea how to say no.  
  
“I didn’t catch that.” Amy might not have heard the words, but she knew that look. That was the look of a man thanking heaven even as he questioned the choices that had brought him to this moment.  
  
“There are strings, baby girl. So many strings. You’ve got me tied in knots I couldn’t cut my way out of.” He closed the difference between them, wrapping his arm around her. He dipped his head and ran his nose along hers. “But if what you need is sex, me to make you feel good, I can give you that. Say the word and I’m on my knees for you.”  
  
Amy grinned wickedly and nipped his bottom lip. She wanted them. Warm hands all over her. Sweet kisses from Steve. Gentle love bites from Bucky. What harm was there in pretending they could really be hers for just one more day? That was really all she was asking for. “Play with me, _Mon Loup_. Make me feel as good as I know you can. _Fuck me_.”  
  
It would take a better man than Bucky to turn down that invitation. He slid his hand up her back, holding her close as he pressed his lips to hers. The kiss was a far cry from what he had intended. Not sweet and romantic. Playful, challenging, filthy, licentious, and _hungry_. She kissed him like she was starving for affection. He poured all that he had back into her. Every drop of love he hadn’t voiced in the last six months. The love that had grown every time she had made him feel safe and whole and desired.  
  
Eventually, and reluctantly, he had to breath. He relinquished her lips, resting his forehead against hers as he gasped air. “Whatever you need, baby girl.”  
  
She pressed another hard, fast, kiss to his lips. “Catch me.”  
  
She was out of Bucky’s embrace before he could react to the kiss. The flash of an ankle in the doorway the only indication where she had gone.  
  
Bucky wasn’t surprised by the fact she vaulted over the first of the dining room chairs she encountered, rather than taking the time to go around. It was the fact that the chair didn’t so much as wobble when she pushed off it that he stored away as a later curiosity. Just now, he had to prove to her that he was worthy of the trust she was showing him. Which meant he wasn’t about to go around either. He planted his foot firmly in the centre of the seat, bounding over the chair without breaking stride.  
  
He very nearly collided with a dumbstruck Steve on his way through the living room. Steve had one hand raised to his lip, eyes wide in awe. Bucky would bet his left arm that Amy had kissed him on her way through. Bucky snagged Steve’s hand to drag him along. It would be fun with just him an Amy, it would be better with all three of them. Everything would be better with all three of them.  
  
Amy swung around the door frame into their bedroom, inches ahead of Bucky.  
  
Bucky dropped Steve’s hand to tackled her, expecting to land on top of her on the blankets. Somehow, she twisted them in the air. He landed on his back with her above him, pinning his shoulders to the bed with her knees. He should be offended by how easily she had taken him down. It was hard to feel anything other than lust when he was moments away from tasting her. He nuzzled the inside of her knee. “God, baby girl.”  
  
“See something you like?” Amy teased, running her hand through his hair and pushing his head into the mattress.  
  
“You know I do.” Bucky looked up at her through lowered lids and licked his lips in anticipation.  
  
Steve wrapped an arm around Amy’s ribs and lifted her off Bucky. He was up to speed with what was going on now. He untied her pants with one hand and Bucky pulled them off from below. “I do too, in case you were wondering.”  
  
Amy laughed and squirmed, linking her hands behind Steve’s neck. It was nice to be appreciated.  
  
Steve pressed an open-mouthed kiss to the hinge of Amy’s jaw. She arched pleasingly into him. Her loose semi-transparent tee-shirt falling off her shoulder, granting him access to the soft skin of her collarbone.  
  
That was the sort of daydream image that made Bucky want to drool. He reached up and tugged Amy back down over his face. Steve let him have her without a fight. He started with a soft affectionate kiss.  
  
Amy gasped with pleasure as Bucky’s mouth found her. He had obviously taken her direction to earn it to heart. She closed her eyes and tipped her head back. She’d been right. She needed this. Even through her underwear his attention felt amazing. A shiver of pleasure ran down her spine.  
  
Steve tugged at Bucky’s pants. He needed hands on both of them as soon as possible. Bucky had his hand curled around Amy’s thigh and was working on her first orgasms. Which left him to get Bucky ready for more. 

Bucky moaned and let his head fall back on the bed. Steve had his mouth on him, and all he could think of was how good it felt. No buzzing in his head. No risk of losing himself. Just Steve and Amy and bliss. Possibly too much bliss. He was literally laying down on the job and letting down his little Fox in the process. She had asked him for something, and he wasn’t giving it to her.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Amy’s leg swing away from him and he grabbed at it. He was absolutely not done with her.

“Relax pretty boy.” Amy purred, sliding Bucky’s hand from her thigh to her calf. “You started something and I’m going to let you finish it. Steve isn’t the only one who likes to watch.” 

She stood just long enough to slip her underwear all the way off and dropped back down over Bucky this time facing the other was. Her shirt and bra followed the underwear, thrown indiscriminately off the bed and out of the way.

Steve looked up at her through his lashes and winked, smiling as best he could with his mouth full of Bucky’s cock. Her eye glinted back with evil intent. Her teeth sinking into her bottom lip, the same lip he wanted to taste himself as soon as possible. This felt right.

Bucky purred and wrapped his hand back around her leg. As long as he got to keep making her make those beautiful noises, and Steve kept doing what he was doing. He took his time carefully exploring Amy with his tongue before he got down to the main event.

Steve switched to licking long stripes up Bucky’s length and swirling around the head. He loved the way Bucky tasted, but damn he was hard on his jaw.

Bucky growled. Steve was just torturing him now. He was so close.

Steve closed his mouth back around Bucky’s shaft. He still wasn’t sure how Amy managed to make this look so effortless. You practically had to hold your breath the entire time. She definitely made it feel effortless, although Bucky didn’t seem to have any complaints about how it felt.

Bucky moaned Steve’s name, clinging to Amy’s thigh hard enough that she would probably have bruises in the shape of his fingers tomorrow. He twitched and pulsed against the roof of Steve’s mouth. The relief of the climax making him shiver.

He pressed his face into Amy’s leg and took a few deep breaths to centre himself. He still had a job to do. He gave Amy another testing lick. She sighed and he felt her twitch. She was close too. He poured his heart into getting her that last little way there.

Amy’s eyes rolled back in her head. She shuddered all over. Tension melted away, replaced by wave after wave of unadulterated pleasure. She sat back on her heels, trying to catch her breath in between spasms.

Bucky grinned at her from between her knees. Nothing made you feel quite as accomplished and make a girl as collected as Amy completely lose herself in the moment. He looked down his body to where Steve was kneeling, looking hungry enough to start drooling. Bucky winked at him. It was a good start. They could do better.

That was enough of a signal for Steve. He scooped Amy up and tumbled them onto the pillows. Kissing her throat and rolling one of her nipples between his fingers to make her gasp in pleasure.

Amy laughed and snuggled against his side. She was very aware of Bucky’s eyes on them. Steve raised one knee, hooking Amy’s leg over it and presenting both of them to that hot gaze. Amy felt herself dripping. One of them was about to be thoroughly fucked, and she couldn’t decide if she wanted to watch or be on the receiving end more. “What do you think, _Mon Ours?_ Should we flip for it?”

“This is your party, Aims.” Steve grabbed Amy’s waist and rolled her on-top of him. Shifting her until her knees were on either side of legs and her hips were canted up exposing her to Bucky who grinned back wickedly. “We’re here to make you feel good.” 

“So good, baby girl.” Bucky growled, kissing her spine and stroking his thumb along her slit.

Steve’s hands wandered over her skin, teasing tickling touches. She closed her eyes and rested her head on Steve’s shoulder while Bucky rolled on a condom. That felt lovely. Rivers of warmth flowing through her.

Bucky took Amy with a low moan. Sliding all the way into her on the first stroke. She was tight and wet and perfect. He played with his pacing a little, until he found the one that made her whimper cling to Steve. He smiled and kissed her spine again as he figured out exactly what she was whimpering. His name. Bucky, Bucky, Bucky. Over and over again.

When Bucky thrust in Amy hips ground against Steve’s erection. The sensation more than enough to drive him mad. Steve grabbed a handful of her hair and kissed her hard. She tasted amazing. Everything felt amazing. And both his people were smiling again. More than smiling. Amy’s eyes fluttered with pure bliss and Bucky was biting his lip in ecstasy. He loved them both so much. He never wanted to see them any less happy than they were in this moment.

Bucky pulled Amy back against his chest. “Are you going to come for me baby girl? Come on. Let Stevie see what it looks like when you finish on my cock.”

Steve reached down and tweaked her clit.

That was all it took to get her there. Amy let out final breathless scream, and slumped forward onto Steve’s chest. Breathing hard and ragged.

Bucky tightened his grip on her hip. He grunted and thrust into her hard a few more times. The twitching and squeezing of her orgasm making his own rush up on him faster than he had expected.

Steve kissed every inch of Amy he could reach. “So beautiful. You’re so beautiful when you finish. I could watch the two of you do that all day.”

“I don’t have any plans.” Bucky said tossing the condom into the trash and dropping onto the pillows next to Steve. That wasn’t strictly true, but since a good chunk of his newly formed plans involved sex or cuddling with these two, he didn’t think it mattered.

Steve turned his head to kiss Bucky. Right now, they didn’t need plans. They had each other. The three of them. Just like this. It was perfection.

“You’re both hedonists.” Amy rolled off of Steve. She wouldn’t mind either. A whole day of kisses and caresses. And orgasms. So many orgasms. She loved not being responsible for her own pleasure. And the boys made it so easy. And maybe, just maybe, she would confess to feeling safe here. Only to herself.

Bucky wrapped his hand around Steve’s shaft. “You haven’t finished yet Stevie.”

Amy reached over lazily, rolling the palm of her hand around the head of Steve’s penis. “I think that means it is your turn.”

Steve gasped. Both of them touching him was a lot for him to handle. Bucky leaned forward to kiss him at the same time Amy bent down and licked the pre-cum off the tip.

Bucky fisted his hand in Steve’s hair. Holding their kiss, as Amy slowly undid their boy with her mouth. He knew they’d been driving Steve crazy enjoying themselves without giving him what he needed. He could feel the conflicting relief and urgency in Steve’s muscles now. Having been on the receiving end of one of Amy’s blowjobs he could only imagine how good it must feel after the better part of an hour worth of teasing.

Steve set his hand on the back of Amy’s head. Resting it there and enjoying the added sensation of her hair moving under his hand. It felt so good. He loved them. That love translated into an electric tingling all over his body. He thought he might be in heaven.

Bucky grinned into Steve’s moan. “She good at that? Are you going to come too?”

He did. The sudden gush catching Amy of guard and making her sit back with a gasp. She smacked his arm. “We have talked about your failure to warn a girl.”

Bucky laughed and rocked onto his knees to kiss her. Delicious. This was how he wanted to spend the rest of his life. Kissing these people while they tasted like each other. He combed his fingers through her sex mussed hair. “Look at you baby girl. So fucking perfect.”

Amy stretched luxuriously and lay back against the pillows. What was it about that husky growl that set her nerves on fire? “I’m just glad I could keep up.”

Steve leaned over and kissed her cheek. “You do more than keep up.”

Amy gave him a gentle shove and he collapsed onto his side of the bed grinning.

Bucky sprawled across the foot of the bed. He couldn’t remember every having a bed this big. Certainly not to himself. Not that he wanted it to himself now. He was much happier with Steve and Amy occupying the rest of the space. The world wasn’t so bad when the only question he had to ask himself was which of the two people he loved he was going to lay on, and if he could get Amy to scoot over, he could lay diagonally across both of them.

Amy stretched. It had been good, but it was time to go. Steve liked to cuddle after sex, and she didn’t want to make him feel awkward when he reached for Bucky and not her. Two hours, a long shower, a light snack, and she could come back for the night. It wouldn’t be awkward if she just slipped into bed once they were already wrapped around one another. Where had her clothes gone? Her underwear was wedged under the pillow next to her. She didn’t strictly need her bra. She could find it later. She wanted her shirt though. She spotted it hanging off the edge of the table on Steve’s side of the bed.

She leaned across Steve, and hooked a finger through the neck.

Steve caught her around the waist before she could slip away. “Stay.”

Amy bit her lip and looked away from him. He couldn’t keep doing this sort of thing too her. Didn’t he know it only broke her heart more when he was sweet about everything? She’d had her fun, now she should get out of their way. “I shouldn’t.”

“Why not?” Steve kept an arm around her, tangling his other hand in the fall of her hair. “I know you like to cuddle after sex, to have someone play with your hair. Why not just stay and let me? Let us.”

Not someone. Steve. She hated cuddling. Couldn’t stand the men she slept with playing with her hair. Or worse, touching her neck. She had always smacked their hands away when they tried. Always told them to leave, or left herself, before things could get this far. Until Steve. He made her feel safe and loved when he did it. But he had Bucky… Bucky the only other person able to tempt her with cuddling. “I can’t.”

“Why not?” Bucky rolled onto his stomach. He thought he knew why she was trying to run away. She was trying to protect his relationship with Steve, but she was missing two very important facts. He loved her the just as much as he loved Steve and she loved both of them both in return.

“I don’t want to talk about it.” Steve pressing the matter Amy understood. But Bucky? It was cruel. Letting her seduce him and then forcing her into this fight. If he wanted her to leave all he’d had to do was say so. He should have said so. And he should have said no to her proposition. This. This was unfair and unkind.

All she had wanted was a moment of self deception. Not to lose everything.

“Why not?” Steve sat up to watch her. He wished she just would tell him what she needed. He would do anything to make her happy.

Amy pulled a pillow into her chest defensively. She still didn’t have her shirt. She didn’t want to fight with Steve over whether they had a future together while she wasn’t wearing pants… not again. “I just don’t.”

“That’s not an answer, Amy.” Steve pushed his hair back in frustration. Sometimes the way Amy was physically incapable of giving a straight answer drive him crazy

“You know why.” Amy whispered curling tighter around the pillow. What about Steve or Bucky’s shirt, were either of them on this side of the bed?

“No. I don’t.” Last night she had a panic attack at the idea that he was injured. Today she wouldn’t stay in bed after sex. Steve was getting whiplash trying to track these mixed signals.

“You do.” Amy insisted a little louder. He had figured it out months ago. Before they even came to Wakanda. He had figured it out sitting next to a fire in Mongolia. Shards of metal in his knuckles and her heart in his hands.

“Just tell us.” Steve shot back. It had to be something stupid. Puritanical guilt over sleeping with both of them at them same time. A hold over from when the bastard had convinced her she wasn’t worthy of being love. Or maybe a potential political marriage being negotiated. They could work through any of those if they could just get on the same page.

“Because I’m in love with you.” Amy half yelled.

The words hung in the air.

Amy wished she could claw them back. Make them disappear. They were too much. She couldn’t stay now that they were out there. They wouldn’t be able to pretend she wasn’t a threat to their relationship anymore. She had ruined everything.

Steve was speechless. She had said it. The one thing he had been sure she wouldn’t say out loud. The one thing he had so wanted her to say. She had said it. It was real. Amy loved him. She _loved_ him, and she looked terrified of that fact.

“Good job, baby girl.” Bucky chuckled and crawled across the bed to her. There it was. They were almost all on the same page now. One more little push and they could get to figuring out how this was going to work. “How do you feel about me?”

“I hate you.” Amy croaked. She was crying now. She could feel the hot tears burning trails down her cheeks. It was too much. After yesterday, it was all too much.

Bucky kissed the tears off her cheeks. “No, you don’t.”

“I do. I-I hate your stupid grin. And the way you always want to cuddle.” Amy sniffed and scrubbed at her face in irritation. This was ridiculous. She didn’t cry, certainly not in front of people.

“Maybe I didn’t need to make you promise not to lie to me. You’re terrible at it.” Bucky chuckled, lifting her chin so she couldn’t avoid his eyes. “Say it, baby girl.”

Amy locked on his silver-grey eyes. She was leaving anyway. She had to. What did it matter if he knew? “I love you too. And that terrifies me.”

“That’s my little Fox.” Bucky eased forward and pressed his lips to hers. He rested his forehead against her. She didn’t need to be afraid. He didn’t need to be afraid. They we’re going to be alright. All three of them were going to be alright. “We’ll get through it together.”

Another sob escaped Amy. She was raw and vulnerable after yesterday. None of her defences were holding. She felt like she was shattering along all the hairline cracks that had been forming the last few months.

Warm arms wrapped around her pulling her close. “You love me? Us?”

Amy turned her face up. Steve gazed down at her his face full of wonder.

Amy lunged up and kissed him. She needed him. Everything was falling apart, and she needed him. Needed them. When Steve pulled away to breath she whimpered. Bucky cupped her cheek and turned her face to take his place. Amy wrapped an arm around his neck and pulled him closer. She knew her kisses lacked finesse and grace. But she was desperate. Desperate for as much of them as she could have before their little world finished ending.

They took turns kissing and caressing her as she sobbed inconsolably. Bucky muttering low words into her skin between kisses. Eventually the words managed to break through the fog of Amy’s desperation. “Nothing is going to keep us apart. We have each other. We don’t need anything else. I will follow you anywhere. I promise, baby girl. I’m yours forever.”

“What?” Amy croaked, trying to focus on his face through the veil of her tears.

“I didn’t tell you, did I? My bad.” Bucky chuckled, kissing her cheeks again. “Probably should have told you months ago, but I was terrified of scaring you off." He sat back a little so she could see the entirety of his serious expression and posture. Read his body language and see that there was no lie or deception there. "I love you.”

Amy hiccuped and buried her face in his neck, clinging to him. 

Bucky smoothed her hair back softly. “I love you, so much, Amy. That’s not going to change. No matter what, that’s not going to change.”

There were more kisses and gentle coddling until finally, Amy fell into an exhausted sleep.

Steve carefully tucked her in, so she was nestled between the two of them and reached for Bucky. He was exhausted himself. He felt like an elastic band that had been stretched too tight too long and had finally been allowed to relax. Finally, he wasn’t being pulled in two different directions. He had them both. He didn’t have to choose. His sweet stubborn girl was with them. Bucky had done that, somehow, he had taken a disaster and turned it into a dream. “This is going to work isn’t it? The three of us?”

Bucky stroked Amy’s hair softly. She was dead to the world. Asleep like this she looked so fragile and small. Poor little Fox. She’d had to be so strong for so long. “I don’t think we’re done convincing her. Our little Fox is stubborn and scared. But yeah. We’ll work.”

“Little Fox.” The pet name felt good on Steve’s tongue. “You know the only other people who call her that are her aunts.”

Bucky yawned and snuggled into the pillows. He needed a nap. “It’s what she is.”

*****

When they woke up again Bucky sent Shuri a quick message to get them all out of their responsibilities for the rest of the day. The evening was spent piled together on the couch watching calming cooking shows. All trading kisses and cuddling close to one another. The boys made sure that Amy was never out of arms reach of at least one of them.

Moonlight streamed through the bedroom window. Steve watched shadows dance on the ceiling. None of them had bothered to close the curtains when they tumbled into bed. In the hazy dark of midnight, the last few hours felt unreal. But Amy was here. Head pillowed on Bucky’s arm. Bucky had his face buried in her hair. Her hand was curled in the centre of his chest. Steve had his arms around both of them. It reminded him of heaven.

“Hey.” Steve woke Amy with a kiss behind her ear.

“Hey yourself.” Amy grumbled rolling over in his arms. She was warm and safe between her two boys again. And she was allowed to be. The howling pain inside her had gone quiet. Not gone. But at least silent.

“Say it again?” Steve whispered smoothing her hair.

“Say what again?” Amy leaned into hand. She definitely didn’t want to wake up.

“Say you love me. Otherwise I’m going to start thinking that this was all a dream.” Steve massaged her scalp softly. It had to be a dream. He had everything he wanted in this moment. He never got what he wanted.

Amy fully opened her eyes for the first time during this exchange. “You woke me up in the middle of the night to tell you I love you?”

Steve grinned she wasn’t even trying to sound like she was actually angry. “Well when you put it like that…”

Amy nestled against his chest, unable to hide her smile. Maybe she didn’t have to wake up from this dream. Maybe she was going to be allowed to keep them both. “I love you. You’re an idiot.”

“He's our idiot.” A sleepy Bucky cuddled closer. They were going to have a discussion about who slept where in the bed tomorrow. He missed being in the middle and they apparently couldn’t resist the urge to talk to each other regardless of the time. “And I love you.”


	60. The Talk

Amy jogged to a stop. The run was helping. A good workout always helped center her. Especially a good run with some height involved. Which was why she had found her way to the bottom of the waterfall. She’d told Steve and Bucky she loved them. There was no more denying it. They knew. They both claimed they loved her back. And she… She didn’t know what happened next.  
  
She always knew what happened next. Or at least she pretended she did. She might have to surrender control and trust her boys to get her through her uncertainty. Bucky was right. The three of them working was just as unlikely in the grand scheme of things as any two of them. And even if it did eventually lead to heartbreak, she would have happiness in the meantime.  
  
Her phone buzzed in her pocket. She fished it out of an inside pocket. Speak of the devil. Her big teddy bear of a former captain checking up on her.  
  
S: Did you go out?  
  
A: Needed a run.  
  
S: How are you doing this morning?  
  
A: Checking up on me, Rogers?  
  
S: I love you, and you kind of had a big emotional moment yesterday. Not to mention the day before. Let a guy be nervous when you sneak out after breakfast.  
  
A: I’m alright. I’ll be back in about two hours.  
  
S: I love you.  
  
Amy rolled out her joints, flexed her fingers, and considered the rock wall in front of her. The spray from the falls slicked the hand holds. Moss softened the grips, ready to crumble if she tried to grip them too hard.  
  
Her phone buzzed again. A phone call this time. She laughed at the id and swiped to answer. “Hello Steve. Can I assume nothing awful has happened in the last five minuets and you’re just calling because you wanted to hear my voice?”  
  
“I love your voice.” Steve purred. “You didn’t say it back.”  
  
Amy switched the feed to an earpiece and started up the cliff. “Didn’t say what back?”  
  
“I love you. I want to hear it, Amy. You said it. And now I want to hear it all the time. Every day. Preferably for the rest of our lives. Or see it, since, you know, text.”  
  
Amy rolled her eyes indulgently. She should have known words of affirmation was one of his primary love languages. He was such a verbal creature. Not like Bucky, who read volumes in tiny gestures and poured out his affection through touch. “I love you. And I’ll be home soon.”  
  
Steve had ended the call with another declaration and Amy was three quarters of the way up the cliff before she realised what she had actually said. Home. She had called their apartment home. And it was. There was no where she would rather be. At least, no place that didn’t also have them.  
  
*****  
  
Steve leaned back in his chair, his knee bouncing as he tried to keep his anxiety under control. This conversation had to happen. He knew it had to happen. It should have happened months ago really. But he was a coward and hadn’t wanted to deal with the consequences. Today, he had at least a little reassurance that it wouldn’t go as badly as his imagination told him it could. Amy had said she would be back in two hours, that had been a one hour and fifty minuets ago. Any second now, she would be back, and he could… poke a tender spot, because he never could resist poking a tender spot.  
  
Bucky’s foot bounced too. Not from nerves, he wasn’t entirely sure why Steve was so on edge anyway. Today, his baby girl and his punk were both willing to admit they loved him and each other, he’d slept wrapped around them both, and there was a quiche waiting in the fridge so he didn’t even have to worry about dinner. It was a good day, and nothing was going to shake him.  
  
The door opened. Steve froze.  
  
Amy raised an eyebrow at the scene. “Why do I feel like my parents just found out I’m failing a class.”  
  
“You ever fail a class, baby girl?” Bucky tipped his head to the side and grinned at her. He couldn’t see her ever doing anything less than brilliantly.  
  
The corner of Amy’s mouth twitched. “No. I did get a pretty stern talking to the time I crashed my dad’s vintage military Jeep into a tree.”  
  
“When did you do that?” Bucky was curious. She had to have learned to drive before sixteen, and her early life fascinated him.  
  
“When I was eight.” Amy leaned over the back of the couch and fixed his messy little bun. “I couldn’t quite reach the clutch.”  
  
Bucky smiled up at her adoringly, tipping his head into her clever fingers. His little Fox had been a little renegade. No one in their right mind would give an eight-year-old the keys to a military jeep. She must have stolen them. He couldn’t wait to here exactly how far she had gotten. And how she had gotten it moving in the first place if she couldn’t reach the clutch.  
  
Steve shook his head to clear it. This was important. He couldn’t let himself get distracted by the warm fuzzy sensation that filled his chest when Amy and Bucky flirted so casually. “We are getting off topic.”  
  
“You don’t want to hear about little Fox stealing a car at age eight?” Bucky nuzzled Amy’s wrist. He wanted to hear about it. He wanted to hear every tiny detail about her life. Every childhood misadventure, every thrilling mission, every fabulous story from fashion week. He wanted to be so familiar with her life that he forgot where she ended, and he started. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. Now without any silly unconfessed secrets to keep them apart.  
  
Steve gripped his knee to stop himself running his hand through Bucky’s hair and undoing all Amy’s hard work. Then pull her hair out of its bun to and spending several hours showering them with affection. It had to wait. “Not as much as I want to talk about having a future with the people I love.”  
  
Amy settled on the couch opposite Bucky with a leg tucked under her. “You want to have the talk.”  
  
“Given that ignoring it led to you being a sobbing mess the night after you had a panic attack?” No. Steve rubbed the back of his neck. He wanted everything to be alright without having to expose any weaknesses. But this was too important to leave to chance. “Yeah. I want to have the talk.”  
  
“We’re going steady.” Bucky leaned back, drumming his fingers on the arm of the couch. When Steve had said the three of them needed to have a sit down, he’d assumed it was about work, or the man hunt. Not a hard conversation that had the very real potential to drive his skittish little Fox away. “What’s there to talk about?”  
  
Steve searched Amy’s eyes. There was something complicated and conflicted there. He wished, not for the first time, that she was easier to read. He also wished he could be as confident of them as Bucky was. He wasn’t. He’d been so focused on work and getting Bucky better, that he hadn’t noticed Amy was one bad day away from a full-blown catatonic state. He’d been so sure that his strong girl _was_ strong, that he hadn’t noticed how hard they were leaning on her fault lines. “Are we?”  
  
“I—“ Amy hesitated, licking her lips and deliberately avoiding looking directly into Steve’s too blue eyes. Loving them didn’t change anything. “I’m staying.”  
  
Bucky’s head snapped towards her. “That’s not what Steve asked. Baby girl… You know we love you. And need you. Not need you because of the things you can do, but because you’re you. You know that, right?”  
  
Amy shook her head. He made it sound simple. It wasn’t simple. Nothing was simple. “I know you think that, but…”  
  
“Nat thinks you’re projecting, and you’re worried what we have’s not real.” Steve supplied.  
  
That made Amy look at him. Nat had told him. And he hadn’t told her she had told him. Which meant… Amy couldn’t even guess what it meant. “You knew?”  
  
“I did. But I didn’t take it seriously.” Steve leaned his elbows on his knees and maintained firm eye contact with her. “Aims, I’ve been able to tell when you’re messing with my mind from the beginning. The whole ‘I love you, but I shouldn’t’ conflict that means we keep snapping at each other. Buck and I sleeping through the night once you fall asleep. That's not you. It's just... Us. My feelings for you, the way I want to share everything with you, protect you, make your life better anyway I can? That’s all me. I know it is all me.”  
  
Steve dropped his eyes for a second. Considering the exact words he wanted to say next. Slowly, he looked back up at her. Bucky-- Bucky needed him. He wasn’t going anywhere. But Amy… she didn’t need anyone. Or at least she didn’t think she did. She would only stay if she wanted to. “I love you, sweetheart. And I don’t know what I’ll do if you walk away again. Especially now that I know for sure that you love me back. Us back.”  
  
Bucky reached for Amy, dragging her to his end of the couch. He pulled her into his lap and buried his face in her neck. “I love you, baby girl. So much more than I thought I could love anyone anymore.”  
  
“So. Are we going steady? Are we figuring this thing out? Because if we’re not…” Steve swallowed. This was the part he was dreading. Selfishly, he wanted to skip it. To just pretend that everything was fine. He couldn’t not if he wanted to do right by Amy. “I think we should let you leave. It isn’t fair for us to keep dominating your life, if we aren’t sharing it.”  
  
Bucky froze. Amy couldn’t leave. Above everything else, Amy couldn’t leave. He wasn’t about to let Steve drive her out of their—his—life like that. Amy was skittish around commitment. There was too much of a risk she would call Steve’s bluff. And Bucky knew it was a bluff. Steve spent too much time watching the door waiting for Amy to come home for it to be anything else. “If you make Amy leave, I’m going with her.” He looked up at her. It was easy to forget that she would be fine on her own. Maybe not entirely happy, but perfectly and unquestioningly fine. “If you’ll take me.”  
  
Amy wrapped herself protectively around Bucky’s head and shoulders. “I’m not going anywhere. I love you, and you need me.”  
  
A small smile crept across Steve’s face. That had gone… better than he had expected honestly. Amy had agreed. Bucky hadn’t freaked out too badly. He really did have everything he wanted. “Then I guess we’re dating.”  
  
Amy blushed and pressed her cheek into Bucky’s hair. “You’re such an old-fashioned idiot.”  
  
“Yeah. But he’s our idiot.” Bucky let himself relax, melting into Amy’s hold with relief. She was his, theirs, and she was she was staying. He curled his fingers into her hair and drew her down for a kiss. Not a kiss stolen this time. One freely and happily given. He nipped at her lower lip, pleased beyond words when she nipped back.  
  
“Not so fast you two.” Steve hated to be on the receiving end of two sets of disappointed eyes, but only having half a conversation was what had gotten him and Amy into trouble before. “If were doing this, there are things we need to actually figure out.”  
  
“Steve.” Bucky groaned, pressing his face into Amy’s shoulder. They’d only barely managed to convince her to stay. If he started expecting more from her, she would have every right to give up and wash her hands of them.  
  
“Don’t give me that tone.” Steve smacked Bucky’s shoulder and drew his chair closer. This was the important part. “Neither of us has been doing right by our girl.”  
  
Bucky deflated. They hadn’t. If they had, telling them she loved them would have come naturally, not been forced out in a moment of weakness. She wouldn’t have felt guilty about touching and kissing them. The sharp edges that made her worry they didn’t all fit would have worn away naturally. “We can do better. I love you. And we will do better.”  
  
“Sweetheart. We’re idiots. Both of us, don’t argue, Buck. You need to spell it out for us sometimes.” Steve folded her hand between his. “Tell us what you need us to do to keep you happy. If the big stuff scares you, start small.”  
  
Amy bit her lip. The big stuff did scare her. Absolutely terrified her. “I like reading with you or watching movies. I love that you take care of me without coddling me. I even like when you tell me I’m working too much and make me take a break.”  
  
Steve nodded and kissed her fingertips. “You do work too hard. We should look at spacing Bucky’s procedures out more, giving you more recovery time, or figuring something out so we aren’t relying on you so much.”  
  
Amy shook her head. She knew where he was coming from. But she wasn’t pushing herself so hard just out of love for Bucky. “That’s not a good idea. He’s a threat to everyone as long as he’s not in control of his own mind.”  
  
“Okay, we’ll play that one by ear.” Steve wasn’t going to give up on it without a fight, but he had to concede that she was right. And he might be able to schedule his time with Natasha and Sam better, give her breaks that way. “The other side too. What do we do that drives you crazy?”  
  
Amy smiled a little. “I hate kale.”  
  
Steve nodded. That was an easy fix. “Bucky can plant some spinach instead.”  
  
“And…” Amy trailed off. It was silly. A hold over from a long time ago. It was also on a very different scale from her vegetable preferences.  
  
“And?” Bucky asked softly. There was something big behind that single word. Quite probably the same dark thing that haunted Amy’s eyes any time it looked like she might be allowed to be happy for a while.  
  
Amy dropped her eyes to her hands in her lap, she couldn’t look at either of them. Although the heat of them warmed her skin soothingly. “Promise you won’t use it against me. My love for you. Your love for me. Its not leverage. You can’t threaten to take it away to make me bend to your will.”  
  
“It is all yours.” Steve rubbed his thumb over her lower lip. “Nothing is going to change it. Even when we disagree, my love is yours.”  
  
“Our love.” Bucky whispered, kissing her shoulder. He was going to talk to Nat again. Just to double check that whoever had made his girl so scared of emotion really was beyond this mortal coil. “We’re here for you baby girl. No matter what.”


	61. Commitment, Chores, and Hot Hot Water

Steve watched coffee trickle through the filter. Four days since Amy’s confession. Three since they'd all agreed to try. Pieces were starting to fall into place with the three of them. She wasn’t running away, and he wasn’t trying to repress his feelings. There was still a little hesitation before she kissed him, but it was getting shorter every time. There was no question of where she would sleep on any given night, or reluctance to curl into either of their arms. Steve hadn’t realised how much pain being torn about having Amy in their life was causing him until it had disappeared overnight. They had a future now. The question was what kind of future.  
  
Bucky leaned against Steve side. He wanted his coffee. He had to go take care of the animals, and he wasn’t about to spend an hour shovelling without caffeine. Even pre-coffee it was shaping up to be a good morning. Amy had grumbled and gone back to sleep when they had gotten up. Curling into the warm spot they had left. Bucky was sure by the time he got back she and Steve would be in the dojo running through morning naginata practice. Which, now that they weren’t pretending they weren’t in love, would end with kissing and if he timed it right, the three of them showering together. Hopefully with no extra towels this time. It would be good. Relaxing.  
  
On the other hand, Steve was definitely over thinking something. He reached across Steve to pour the coffee. “Penny for your thoughts.”  
  
Steve licked his lips. What was he thinking? “Buck I… I want to get married.”  
  
“Yeah? I would never have guessed. You’re not really the marrying kind.” Bucky teased filling Steve’s mug. Of course, Steve wanted to get married. That’s who Steve was. Commitment to the core. There was a third cup left in the pot. He poured it into an insulated mug for when Amy woke up. He and his girl had their work cut out for them with Steve.  
  
Steve’s heart clenched. It should be easy. He loved them both. They loved him. There should be a way for them to all be together. For the rest of our lives. “I don’t know how to do it. There’s two of you and--“  
  
Bucky grabbed the back of Steve’s neck and kissed him to cut off the panic spiral. It was nice to be the one on stable footing instead of spiralling himself. But then he had predicted this breakdown was coming and done some thinking on it already. “It’s not hard Stevie. Let’s practice. Step one, get on your knees.”  
  
“On my knees?” Steve sunk to the floor in front of Bucky. This sounded less like figuring out how to deal with wanting to marry more than one person and more like Bucky wanting to fool around. “Like this?”  
  
“That’s right.” Bucky cupped Steve’s chin, rubbing his thumb through his beard. Coffee be damned, this was the best way to wake up. “Damn, you’re pretty like that.”  
  
Steve chuckled and curled his hands around Bucky’s legs. Definitely more like Bucky wanting to fool around. “Is this supposed to help, or am I down here to deal with your dick?”  
  
Bucky slid the hand around to the back of Steve’s head. “I mean while you’re down there…”  
  
“Bucky.” Steve rolled his eyes. Good mornings were a mixed blessing. He loved his boy, but he could be incorrigible.  
  
“Okay, okay.” Bucky laughed and leaned against the edge of counter. “Step two, ask me what Shuri and I talked about during my first check up after New Year’s.”  
  
They were a little too far in for Steve to even pretend that he wouldn’t humour Bucky no matter what crazy tangent he led them down. He kissed Bucky’s hip. And yes, that included a morning blowjob. “What did you and Shuri talk about?”  
  
Bucky caressed Steve’s soft hair. “Marriage customs in Wakanda. Fun fact. They allow multiple marriage here as long as all the participants are consenting adults.”  
  
“They… we could…” Steve’s hands tightened on the back of Bucky’s thighs. They could get married. Legally married. No compromising. Just love. All of them. Together. For the rest of their lives.  
  
“And now you realise why you’re on your knees. Which brings me to step three,” Bucky leaned back against the edge of the counter. “Thank me for figuring out the answer to a question I knew you were going to have before you had it.”  
  
“Thank you, Bucky.” Steve purred, already working on the knot holding Bucky’s sarong closed at the waist.  
  
*****  
  
Steve made Bucky’s very late for his morning chores. To make up for it, he skipped his morning run to help out. They joked and shoved each other as the goats vied for their attention and the chickens scolded them. Steve liked the farm. He especially liked how alive Bucky was when he was down here. It was a calm sort of alive, wholesome, pastoral even.  
  
The animals fed; they turned their attention to the main task of the day. Bucky had made good progress getting the gnarled underbrush cleaned out of the little grove of trees by the hut. Dead bushes and small saplings had been chopped down. The half-fallen tree had been dragged out of the tangle. Everything was piled in the clearing, waiting to be hauled away. Bucky had a hand cart for the purposes, it just needed loading.  
  
They were halfway through clearing the pile, when Steve realised, he had forgotten and important part of their conversation this morning.  
  
He dropped his armful of twigs and branches into the waiting cart and leaned against the side to watch Bucky work. Was it possible, Buck was getting even more handsome? “Hey Buck?”  
  
“Yeah Stevie?” Bucky slung a bale of sticks into the growing pile. He liked that grin. There was a lot of promise in that grin. There was a reason Steve had been able to drag him into all sorts of trouble over the years and the way he smiled was no small factor.  
  
Steve slid around the corner and perched on the back of the cart. “I love you. Wanna get married?”  
  
Bucky snorted and tossed another bundle of brush past Steve’s shoulder. “You really know how to make a guy feel special.”  
  
“That’s not a no.” Steve caught his hand on the down swing, tangling their fingers together and pulling his knuckles to his lips. If Bucky wanted a formal proposal, with candles and him down on one knee, he could do that. This felt more right though. This was the part of their lives he wanted to celebrate. The little moments, not the big ones. The big moments in their lives tended to be the most unpleasant moments. More explosions and bullets than he thought were romantic.  
  
“Course I'll marry you, idiot.” Bucky laughed and dragged Steve into a headlock, kissing his temple in the process. “I’m with you till the end of the line. You wanna get married. I wanna spend the rest of my life with you. ‘s a no brainer.”  
  
“Do people normally call each other idiots when they accept proposals?” Steve shrugged out of the headlock and elbowed Bucky playfully. No one ever reacted to his proposals the way he thought they should.  
  
Bucky grinned back. He was going to spend the rest of his life giving Steve a hard time. Which had always been the plan, but now involved a lot more physical contact. He loved it. “It is a regional thing. Can you imagine Shuri accepting a proposal _without_ calling the other person an idiot?”  
  
“I think that might be generational, not regional.” Steve snorted and pulled the canteen off his belt. Not that Shuri was alone in her attitude. Amy and Bucky both independently picked up the habit of using idiot as a term of endearment. Steve had no plans to ever tell them how much he loved it.  
  
Bucky laughed. The rest of their lives. It sounded better every time he said it, even just in his head. “Point stands.”  
  
Steve sighed and passed Bucky the canteen. Happy as he was, there was no way it was that simple. Nothing in their lives was. “What’s the but?”  
  
Bucky took a long drink and splashed water down the back of his neck. “The but?”  
  
Steve leaned back on his elbows. “That ‘romantic’ speech of yours had a silent ‘but’ on the end. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, but…?”  
  
“I want to spend the rest of my life with you,” Bucky sloshed the water in the canteen. How had being in love with Steve become the easy part of his life? “But I was never going to be the hard sell here. Little Fox is coming around, but she is still skittish as hell. Not that I blame her. It's been less than a week since she agreed to give us a go. Less than six months since we started all this. She's not ready, and I'm not about to go through with anything until she is. Give her a chance to get used to us before you go throwing us further into the fire.”  
  
“You say that like you’re some kind of expert.” Steve sighed and let his head fall back. Bucky was probably right. He was trying to rush things.  
  
“I think I do alright with the ladies.” Bucky smirked into the canteen. That wasn’t quite the lesson, but it was close enough for now.  
  
“You would think that.” Steve shoved him, slopping the last of the water down Bucky’s front.  
  
Bucky glared and dabbed at the wet spot. “Name one time I’ve been wrong about how to handle a girl.”  
  
Steve had been sitting on an answer to that for the better part of a century. “Easter dance, 1938. Dottie and Eileen both slapped you.”  
  
Bucky cleared his throat. That sounded true. He had some pretty clear memories of Steve muttering 'Easter all over again' into a pint glass. That had been in London, so it had happened later, but it felt like a reoccurring joke between the two of them. “I don’t remember that.”  
  
“Yeah, interestingly you didn’t the day after either.” Steve bumped his shoulder against Bucky’s. Amy was a conundrum, but one he could figure out. Even if he was anxious to get to the 'rest of their lives' part.  
  
*****  
  
Steve had had every intention of broaching the subject with Amy after dinner. Not to push her into anything. Just to make sure they were all on the same page. He really had. Then she had suggested that they spend some time in the hot tub, and things had sort of spiralled from there. All three of them were having a good day. Probably the last one for a while, since Shuri had another round of tests and treatments planned for Bucky starting tomorrow. They’d been relaxed, the hot water made Amy’s skin glisten like polished marble, Bucky had been running his knuckles up and down the back of Steve’s neck...  
  
The exact chain of events that lead to Amy sitting on the edge of the tub with one of her leg over Steve’s shoulder was lost in a haze of endorphins and the feeling of skin against skin. Steve wasn’t about to question the process, not when Amy was sighing with pleasure and Bucky was pressed against his back murmuring truly filthy encouragement in his ear. Bucky reached past his head to tweak Amy’s nipple. She moaned and curled her fingers tighter in Steve’s hair. He pulled his head back to look up at her, chest heaving and lips slightly parted. She was gorgeous.  
  
“Bed?” Steve’s voice cracked, even on the single syllable. He needed her. Needed them. For the rest of his life, but also right now.  
  
“Gods. Yes, please.” Amy breathed. There was no reason to hesitate anymore. They were hers. And she wanted them both so much.  
  
Steve scooped her over his shoulder. What his girl wanted she got. He didn’t bother stopping to towel off. Leaving a trail of wet footprints behind him, his hand stroking her water slicked curves.  
  
Bucky cupped her face and dragged her lips to his as they trouped down the hall. Amy laughed into his mouth. Happier than she could ever remember being.  
  
Steve tossed her onto the bed where she landed with a squealing giggle. He was a little embarrassed by how much he loved that sound, he was willing to bet that you could count on one hand the number of people who had heard it. He grabbed Bucky next, burring his fingers in his damp chin length hair. The taste of his tongue was hot and sweet at the same time. Steve had to wonder how he had lived without it for so long.  
  
Bucky crowded into him until his knees hit the edge of the bed and they fell backwards. Steve landed on his back, Bucky on top of him. Bucky grinned as he pinned Steve to the mattress. Steve grinned right back, working a hand between them and curling it around both erections. Bucky moaned and dropped his head to Steve’s shoulder. That always felt so good. Steve’s hands were big and warm and the way he rubbed his thumb over the head at the end of each stroke drove him crazy.  
  
“Is he good at that, baby?” Amy laughed and ran her hands down his back. “Better than me?”  
  
Bucky snapped his head up. Eyes flashing as he smirked at her. “I don’t know about that.”  
  
He dragged her down between them, latching onto her left nipple while Steve lapped at the right. He stroked his fingers along her thighs. Making her twitch and moan was always so much fun. His boy had less patients than he did, his hand going straight for the heart of the matter and spreading her dripping folds apart eagerly. Bucky understood the urgency. Steve had been in the middle of something in the bath, and Steve hated to leave a task half finished. Bucky would just have to find another way to amuse himself. Or be amused. Amy’s hand had found him, cooler than Steve’s but amazing all the same.  
  
Steve pushed Amy’s knees apart. The walk to the bedroom was long enough that he was drooling to get his mouth back on her. Especially with Bucky working on driving her crazy. His first lick along her slit, made her clutch at Bucky and the sheets. He purred into her softness and set determinedly to work. Earning himself a stream of soft whimpers and moans muffled by Bucky’s lips.  
  
He slid two fingers inside her, she was slippery, hot, and tight. His cock twitched expectantly, remembering how she would feel around him. Swirling his tongue around her sweet clit, he told it to wait. His pleasure wasn’t important right now.  
  
Amy’s hand tightened in the sheets. The sensation that had been growing in the pit of her stomach since Steve had started teasing her in the tub crested. She let out more of a sigh than a scream. Letting Steve finish her, while Bucky held her close and kissed her was such a relief. She was addicted to them already; it was terrible and wonderful all at the same time.  
  
Bucky grinned at the sight of the panting girl under his hand. He reached over for a delicious kiss with Steve. “My turn.”  
  
Steve chucked and relinquished his place. Amy arched her back and stretched in anticipation. Both thinking that whatever Bucky had planned sounded like an excellent idea.  
  
Bucky knelt between Amy’s legs and pulled her into his lap. He let Steve roll a condom onto him, so he didn’t have to let her go, even for that long. As soon as it was in place, he slid into Amy’s welcoming embrace. Steve helped with the alignment, more to keep touching Bucky than because he needed the help.  
  
Amy opened her mouth and batted her eyes at Steve. She could multitask. Bucky shifted his angle inside her, making her moan and purr. She could delightfully multitask.  
  
Steve wasn’t about to deny that kind of invitation. He settled next to her head a let her tease the head of his cock with her tongue. She was very good with her tongue. It required her to twist half onto her side and prop herself on one elbow, but she didn’t seem to mind. He definitely didn’t mind when she wrapped her arm around his leg just above his knee to anchor herself. He slipped his hand around the back of Bucky’s neck again. He couldn’t decide if kissing Bucky while Amy sucked him was romantic or not, but it felt good enough that he was willing to set that question aside for now.  
  
He groaned into Bucky’s mouth as she gave up on teasing him and took more of him into her mouth. Without opening his eyes or breaking off his kiss with Bucky, Steve ran his hand over Amy’s chest. Finding her nipple took some groping, but her managed. He rolled it gently between his finger. Love and lust swirled together, casting everything in a warm velvety aura.  
  
Amy gasped and pulled her mouth away from Steve. She closed her eyes and let herself met into the feeling. She twitched and writhed. Hand spasming around Steve’s thigh as the pieces of another orgasm clicked into place. This time she did scream. Pleasure exploding out of her like a bubble bursting. She slumped bonelessly on the mattress, trying to catch her breath between waves of pleasure.  
  
Bucky pulled slowly out of her, kissing along her body as she shuddered. He wasn’t quite done, but Steve looked closer and thought his girl would enjoy the change. Watching them together was almost as much fun anyway. Besides, they would make it worth his while before they were done. “Will you fuck Steve for me, baby girl?”  
  
“Well, if you insist.” Amy panted, chest heaving between each breath.  
  
Steve lay back on the bed, holding his arms out towards her. What Bucky wanted; Bucky got. “Come here, sweetheart.”  
  
She stretched luxuriously and rolled on top of him. She swayed, a little drunk from bliss and the heat of her boys’ hands on her skin.  
  
Bucky stabilised her from behind, his hand resting over her tattoo, her racing heart beating under his palm. He could feel her shiver as she slid down onto Steve. He nipped at her ear. “Poor baby girl. I left you all wet and sensitive, didn’t I?”  
  
“Bucky.” Amy whimpered and reached behind her head to slide her hands into his hair. He had left her achingly sensitive. Between Steve’s thicker girth and the change of angle, she felt like her skin was on fire.  
  
“Steve’s got you.” Bucky kissed her neck and wrapped his arm around her. “You just lean back into me and let him take care of you.”  
  
She didn’t just lean back into him. Amy reached behind her, sliding her hand over his abs until her fingers closed around his shaft. If Steve was going to take care of her, someone should at least keep Bucky in a state of delightful torment.  
  
Steve wrapped his hands around Amy’s hips, moving her up and down in an easy rhythm. If Bucky said he was going to take care of his girl he’d better live up to it. Being inside Amy always felt amazing, and the way Bucky was smirking over her shoulder was enough to dive him crazy all by itself.  
  
Amy was glad Steve had taken control of their pace. With Bucky kissing her neck and her hand behind her back to stroke him, everything was fogged in a haze of pure bliss. She was losing coordination as Steve brought her closer to her climax. Not that Bucky seemed to mind. He was still holding her close, nipping at her jugular and murmuring a combination of sweet and filthy things in a verity of languages.  
  
“Steve.” Amy moaned her head falling back onto Bucky’s shoulder. She was so very close.  
  
Steve heard ‘I love you’. He would have heard it every time if he’d been paying attention. He tightened his grip on her hips. She would have bruises in the shape of his fingerprints tomorrow. It didn’t bother Steve the way it once had. Not when Bucky would match his finger to them and tell her how beautiful she was.  
  
Bucky winked at Steve, sliding his hand down Amy’s body and between her legs. A little tweak should be all his girl needed.  
  
He groaned as Amy’s hand tightened on him. He loved when he was right. She must have tightened up like that all over, Steve’s answering moan confirmed exactly how good it felt.  
  
The aftershocks of Amy’s orgasm were enough to bring Steve to climax himself. He slid his hands up to her waist and pulled her down harder. There was nothing he loved more than finishing deep inside her.  
  
Amy rolled off of Steve with long sigh. Now that was what she had need. Still needed, preferably two or three times a week for the rest of her life. She reached back to peel off Steve’s condom, before he got distracted and left a big wet spot in the middle of the bed they were about to share. It went in the bin by the bed and she stretched out on the pillows.  
  
Steve licked his lip, looking up at a grinning Bucky’s kneeling over him. He’d finished. The way Amy lay next to him purring made him think she was content for the night. Which just left Bucky. Bucky, who’s erection was pointing directly at him, like it was accusing Steve of neglecting it by not sucking it right now. Which did raise the question, why wasn’t he sucking it right now? He rolled onto his stomach to solve that problem.  
  
Amy rocked to her knees next to Bucky. She wouldn’t lie, Steve going down on Bucky was a hypnotic sight. She snuggled closer to Bucky’s side to get a better look. Her arms around his neck and head pillowed against his shoulder, she had an excellent view of Steve’s big blue eyes looking up at them. Definitively at them, not just a Bucky. He very deliberately met her eyes as he licked the length of Bucky’s shaft particularly licentiously.  
  
Bucky closed his eyes, Amy hanging off him, Steve’s mouth wrapped around him. Heaven. He curled his hand into Steve’s hair, and nosed the side of Amy’s face until she kissed him again.  
  
Steve felt Bucky twitch against his tongue. He pulled back to breath. Which was apparently the wrong thing to do just that moment. Bucky must have been closer than Steve had thought. He gasped into Amy’s mouth and finished over Steve’s face and chest. Steve sort of understood what Amy meant when she said it was polite to warn your partner.  
  
“Poor boy, you’re a mess.” Amy laughed and wiped his cheek.  
  
“I think it is a good look.” Bucky teased, fluffing Steve’s hair affectionately. It earned him an amused head shake from Steve and a visceral eye roll from Amy.  
  
Amy fetched a washcloth to clean them up. Once she was satisfied none of them were going to wake up unpleasantly crusty, she dropped onto the mattress next to Steve. She was exhausted and wanted to be cuddled. By the end of the night, she would probably be wrapped around Bucky, but right now Steve was crying out to be used as a pillow.  
  
He rolled her onto his chest, where she settled in contentedly. Her happy place, warm and safe in his arms, nose to nose with a smiling Bucky. She stroked Bucky’s cheek absently, letting her hand fall into the space between them. She was sleepy, relaxed, and completely worn out by her exertions with her boys.  
  
“I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” Steve rested his hand on the small of her back, holding her in place on top of him. Right where she belonged. Skin to skin, her slow breathing and even heartrate reassuring under his palm.  
  
“Me too. We’ll figure it out, _Mon Ours_.” Amy nuzzled into his neck, her eyes blinking closed. She felt like she was melting. The stress of denying she loved her boys gone, sleep was finding her much faster. She slept, she woke up refreshed, and when she woke up, she kissed whoever was closest without questioning the instinct.  
  
He tucked her hair behind her ear. “Don’t drift off on me, sweetheart. We’ve got plans to make.”  
  
She mumbled something that sounded confused, even to Steve who couldn’t understand the Japanese. Her fingers fluttered across his ribs. He felt the last of the tenseness drain out of her limbs, as sleep pulled her all the way under. Her expression peaceful, with her eyelashes resting against her cheeks.  
  
“Let her sleep, punk.” Bucky hooked his arm around Steve and dragged them both closer. “We’ve got all the time in the world.”


	62. Less than Perfect Day, Less than Perfect Plan

The next morning was a long one for Steve. Amy woke up enough to kiss them goodbye when he got up for his run and Bucky left for the farm. Then drifted off again right away, her arms still around Bucky’s neck when she did. Waiting for her to wake up when he got back was interminable. He prepped some chicken pieces for dinner, threw a load of laundry in the wash, followed up on a few emails from contacts, made tea so it was ready for her, and waited. He’d fully proposed to Bucky yesterday. They needed to have at least some conversation about their future.  
  
Finally, she drifted down the hallway, robe falling open over Bucky’s shirt in place of a nightgown. She rubbed the back of Steve’s neck as she slipped into the chair kitty-corner from him. “You’re looking serious this morning.”  
  
Steve slid a mug of tea across the table to Amy. “I wanted to talk to you about our future.”  
  
Amy sipped the tea. He’d scalded the leaves again. He almost always did. But the gesture was sweet enough to make up for a bitter tinge to her tea. “Our future?”  
  
“What would you think about making things…” Steve weighed his words carefully. He didn’t want to scare her off with the same question that had made her leave him in the past. “More formal?”  
  
“Formal?” Amy asked swirling her tea to cool it.  
  
“I want to spend the rest of my life with you.” Steve said softly, wrapping her small cool hand in both of his.  
  
“That’s what we’re doing.” Amy pointed out, gesturing around them with her teacup. “This, waking up together, eating together, arguing about who’s turn it is to do the dishes, bouncing plans and ideas off each other, waking each other up in the middle of the night because we had a bad dream, this _is_ the rest of our lives.”  
  
“You don’t want…” Steve drifted off, hoping she would finish the sentence for him. She met his gaze with open earnest eyes. He swallowed the words ‘get married’. He’d thought he was ready to say it to her again. Visions of her walking out of his rooms threatened to flood him. “…More?”  
  
Amy frowned at him incredulous. “What more? You want my power of attorney? Should I make Bucky my medical contact? In case you haven’t noticed, love, you’re kind of number one and two on every most wanted list. I can’t exactly go around making you my plus two to the White House cherry blossom party this year. Not without all three of us getting dragged in front of the Hauge.”  
  
Steve chafed her hand between his. Admittedly, he hadn’t really considered the ramifications of his plan in the context of the wider world. But, this wasn’t about all of that. This was about them. “I love you. I don't want to do any of this without you. Wakanda, being on the run... breathing... none of it means anything if I lose you.”  
  
“I love you too. And I love our life.” Amy set her cup down and folded her hand over his. “As crazy and reckless as it all is, I wouldn’t change a moment.”  
  
Steve stroked the back of her hand. She was trying to give him an out. Which was fair. If he was scared of his proposal, how much more afraid was she? This was why Bucky kept saying wait. “Are you going to the White House cherry blossom party?”  
  
“God no. It is always such a bore. The Clan is sending Yuma and Hakari. I found myself a big girl job, so I don’t have to go to pointless midlevel formalities.” She checked the time on her phone. “Speaking of my job. I am supposed to be in the throne room in fifteen minutes for formal audience time.”  
  
Steve sighed and leaned back in his chair. She was right. This was their life. Scared as Amy had been to be part of it in the first place, it wasn’t fair to ask her for more, at least not yet. Bucky said she needed time to get used to the idea. There was no rush. Not really. They had a lifetime, not a finger snap. They could take their time. “Remind T’Challa that we are supposed to be sparing tonight.”  
  
“I will.” Amy pecked him on the cheek. “Love you, _Mon Ours_. Give Bucky a kiss when he gets back.”  
  
Steve blew her another kiss as she wafted out the door eight minutes later. Beautiful, ethereal, brilliant, not the kind of creature you could pin down before she let you. Hadn’t he spared with her enough times to have learned that? Things happened when Ayame wanted them to. Not before. This was no difference.  
  
Amy managed to give Bucky his kiss herself. Just a quick brush of her lips against his as they passed in the entry.  
  
Bucky frowned, looking between the door and his guy. “Did you just ask Amy to marry you?”  
  
Steve blew out a long breath. He’d meant to. He didn’t think the conversation they’d just had actually counted in the end. “I didn’t not ask.”  
  
“And?” Buck asked searchingly. He had specifically told Steve to give her time. Rushing things wasn’t going to help anybody. But Amy had seemed relaxed. Not excited, but not terrified ether.  
  
Steve shrugged. He hadn’t really been expecting the same easy yes Bucky had given him. Amy was more complicated than that. Her life outside of them was more complicated than that. He and Bucky had lost everything. Which meant all they had was each other and Amy. Amy still had a life and family beyond and separate from them. She also had them and loved them. “She says she’s happy.”  
  
“And we’re waiting.” It wasn’t a question. Bucky didn’t care what Steve wanted. This was about what Amy _needed_. And their girl needed stability before they threw another curve ball at her.  
  
“We’re waiting.” Steve agreed, with another longing look at the door. Relationships meant compromise. Amy was more than worth waiting for. The three of them together was more than worth waiting for.  
  
*****  
  
Amy let herself back into the embassy. It had been a good day, if a long one. There was a very real possibility she would never really get used to formal audiences, even ones as relaxed as the ones here in Wakanda. But she had had managed to catch up with Nakia in a corner, and Shuri had spent a good chunk of the afternoon trying to make her laugh. Which hadn’t worked but had been amusing. She could definitely get used to coming home to the sound of Steve singing along with her J-pop playlist and only getting half the words wrong.  
  
“Your accent is getting better.” Amy used his broad shoulder as an anchor to reach his cheek.  
  
“Tell that to Bucky. He gave up trying to correct me and left an hour ago.” Steve turned and bumped his nose against hers. He hoped his Japanese was getting better. He wanted to understand Amy when she muttered under her breath. Better yet, he wanted to know what she was saying when she got all breathless in bed. He knew he was still struggling with the intonation. And his grasp of the grammar left a lot to be desired. But he was trying.  
  
She lowered back down, peering into the pot. Creamy yellow broth with bright slivers of red pepper and orange carrot floating in it. “Is that Thai chicken curry?”  
  
Steve looked up and smiled at her. It looked like he hadn’t scared her as badly as Bucky had been worried. “Yeah.”  
  
Amy slipped around in front of him, reaching for the spoon Steve had been using for tasting. It smelled delicious, bright with ginger, lemon grass, and fish sauce. And spice. A lot of spice. “I thought you hated it.”  
  
Steve shrugged, reaching around her to turn the stove down. It needed to simmer a little longer, but dinner was essentially ready. Thai curry might not be his favourite, but it was fine. “You don’t. Nakia finally got me the kaffirr limes I've been trying to find. I know you prefer the fruit to the leaves."  
  
Amy leaned against his chest. That was true. The zest and juice were just so much brighter than the leaves. And the instant version was worse than either. She was still slightly surprised. While Steve had learned to like spicy food, they still weren’t as familiar to him as the plain ‘healthy’ foods he had learned to cook right after he had been defrosted, so they didn’t get them very often.  
  
Steve looked down at the back of her head. Cooking her favourite foods was one way to make her feel safe and at home here. There were better options though. Although the best one Steve could think of didn’t actually happen ‘here’. “You should come with me. Next time I go out. You should come too.”  
  
Amy raised her eyebrows at him over a spoon full of spicy broth. She didn't hate the idea, but he’d been precious with her since she’d come back injured.  
  
“You’ve been cooped up here. You could use a little excitement.” Steve stroked her cheek. She wasn’t a hot house flower, to be pruned, watered, and kept at exactly the right temperature lest she wilt. She was a wild creature. It wasn’t that she shouldn’t spend her life wrapped in silks. It was that she deserved to stretch her wings and sink her teeth into something. “And I like watching you work.”  
  
She covered his hand with hers. “I’d like that.”  
  
Steve brought his other hand up to cup her face. Tipping her head back and kissing her long and slow. If this was waiting, he could handle it.  
  
*****  
  
*****  
  
Steve hated watching Bucky’s procedures. They were always too close to how he imagined the torture Bucky had endured. Amy did what she could, but he was still obviously in physical or mental pain for a good chunk of them. Today was especially bad. Shuri was trying something to deactivate the worst of the implants, the one that seemed to trigger the attacks that made him competently lose himself. From the frown on her face, it wasn’t working.  
  
It _was_ sending electric shocks through both of the people Steve loved. Amy was talking it better than she had any right to. Her face completely expressionless. Her hands firmly gripping Bucky's hand and shoulder. The involuntarily spasms through her back muscles were unmistakable though. Bucky was worse, flinching and shuddering, panicked eyes darting from Steve to Amy and back again.  
  
“Is this working?” Steve whispered to Shuri.  
  
“No, and I don’t know why it’s not.” Shuri frowned and swiped through the readouts on her tablet.  
  
“Then we’re calling it.” Steve announced, reaching over to turn off the shocks. “Don’t worry, Buck. We’re done for the day.”  
  
Bucky groaned and rolled off the table. He caught himself before his face hit the floor, but only just.  
  
Amy cracked her neck, unfolding herself from the exam table more slowly than Bucky had. Slow graceful movements gave her the illusion of being fine. Nothing wore you out quite like prolonged mild electric shock. She looked up as Steve’s hand closed softly around her elbow.  
  
“You alright?” Steve kept his voice low, not wanting to worry Bucky. Their girl was looking worn out. Maybe they needed to take a break from trying to help Bucky and give her some time to recover.  
  
“Nothing a hot shower and a nap can’t fix.” She knew her smile was tired. She was tired, tired enough that she would agree to anything Steve wanted in this moment. Up to letting him carry her back to their rooms if that was what he wanted.  
  
In the end Steve didn’t carry either of them. He had half supported Bucky, slinging Bucky’s arm over his shoulders to take as much of his weight as Bucky would let him, and towed Amy along with fingers linked through hers. There might not be much he could do to help them during these experiments, but he could take care of them both afterwards. He said a silent prayer of thanks that Amy had given up on her stubborn refusal to let anyone look after her around the same time she had admitted to loving them. She needed the help and Bucky always fretted when he didn’t know if she was alright. He’d get them tucked up in bed together, and then see what he could do about making food for when they woke up.  
  
*****  
  
It was a lazy, affectionate, shower. Amy and Bucky were both too worn out to do much more than stand under the hot spray of the water. They leaned together, gently scrubbing each other’s backs while Steve massaged their scalps. Big soft fluffy towels and a bare minimum of clothes got them the rest of the way to bed.  
  
Bucky recognised the prickling behind his eyes, from countless punishments. The feeling was disconcerting and made it hard to concentrate on anything, even sleep. Watching Steve and Amy together was comforting. All those, mother hen, overprotective, hero, instincts that they both complained about on a regular day, were very welcome when they were in this condition.  
  
Amy kept jolting awake. Bad dreams intruding even into the little pocket of piece that their afternoon nap normally represented. It was bad enough that she moved to Steve’s side of the bed to avoid disturbing Bucky. Not that the move helped much. Every other time she opened her eyes Bucky was blinking at her in sleepy confusion. Steve’s gentle hand on the back of her neck did help.  
  
*****  
  
The nap wasn’t as successful as Steve would have liked. He hadn’t slept, but he didn’t need the sleep. The real problem was Bucky and Amy had really slept either. They gave up trying after about an hour. Steve sat them both at the table while he started on dinner. Amy dragged her computer over to reply to emails and try to get at least a little work done. Bucky slumped next to her, his head on her shoulder as he read along, occasionally offering advice or commentary. Both of which she tolerated with a good-natured affection, rubbing his leg or massaging his neck. Steve couldn’t help smiling softly as he watched them.  
  
Dinner was a quiet affair. All of them focused on the food. Bucky looked like he was going to fall face down on his plate without Amy propping him up. Amy sat with one leg curled under her, never putting down her knife. Steve kept their glasses full, water for Bucky, cold barley tea for Amy, and made sure that both of them finished their vegetables.  
  
“What do you want to do tonight, Buck?” Steve asked, piling their dishes into the sink. He could wash them later, after Bucky was asleep. Or Amy would, she found cleaning relaxing, for all she hated doing anything else in the kitchen. Or they could do them together, with Amy tucked safely between his arms.  
  
“As little as possible.” Bucky groaned rolling over the back of the couch and landing heavily. He just couldn’t muster the energy to be graceful. He held his arm out, as Amy followed him. She looked tired too, but she was always graceful. By as little as possible, he meant basically the same thing they had done all afternoon. He wanted to curl up with the people he loved and not move.  
  
Amy slumped next to him, rolling her shoulders. She still ached like she had spent the day in strenuous combat. Her back ached, and while she wasn’t feeling sick as such just now, food still wasn’t _agreeing_ with her. She had managed the pasta Steve had made for dinner, but only because she needed the calories. The worst part was there was nothing here she wanted to eat. She was craving _Karē Raisu_ and spring pickles. Not to mention all the things she normally got as take out, fried chicken, and salt and pepper short ribs. Steve was and excellent cook, and Bucky was no slouch himself, but they did end up eating a lot of steak and steamed vegetables. Pasta Primavera had been a nice change, but the acid balance of western food was completely different from what she had grown up with.  
  
The shimmer of Amy’s hair as she rolled her neck out caught Steve’s eye. It had faded back to silver and she hadn’t rushed to dye it. That was an idea. One that would help Amy relax as much as Bucky. “Want to find out why I laugh every time you compare Amy’s hair to starlight?”  
  
“It is like starlight.” Bucky said, pulling her closer. Starlight and silk. Softness and light. He needed her protection more than she needed his, but he would give her everything he could, and he knew Steve felt the same.  
  
“It’s a lot of work to keep it black.” She grumbled curling into a ball in his lap. Watching one of her favourite movies and an early bedtime sounded ideal.  
  
Steve leaned over the back of the couch to kiss them both on their foreheads. “It is pretty like this. You put on the movie; I’ll make popcorn.”  
  
Amy perked up. She didn’t want popcorn, but she wouldn’t say no to something salty. “Do we have any—"  
  
“You and your fish.” Steve laughed, tucking her hair behind her ear. He didn’t get her affection for _iwashi senbei._ The little dried fish had such a weird texture, and he had thought that one of the benefits of this century was not eating the heads. Amy loved them though, and as long as she was eating, he wasn’t about to complain. “I’ll check.”  
  
There was a bag of _iwashi senbei_ in the pantry, right next to the popcorn. Steve brought both out to the living room, along with a jug of iced green tea out of the fridge. He spread the food on the coffee table and found himself a spot on the couch, Amy’s legs resting in his lap, his arm around Bucky’s shoulder. The soft quaint story was already playing. Amy had taken pity on him and put on subtitles. He brushed his fingers against her neck in thanks. She nuzzled against his hand and Bucky’s shoulder. A sense of rightness washed over Steve as the little old lady on the screen hauled herself into the back of the strange machine monster as it walked across the moor.  
  
Bucky was half asleep, half hypnotized by the waving field of wildflowers on the screen, when his bracelet started flashing. He shifted Amy against his chest so he could open the message. A text, not a video, which from Shuri meant bad news. Bright girl, no poker face. “Shuri wants to have a meeting tomorrow.”  
  
Steve frowned. Normally they made a point of having a few days between treatments. They all needed time to recover. “I don’t know if tomorrow is a good idea, Buck. You and Aims are both in pretty rough shape. Maybe we should take a few days.”  
  
Bucky bumped his head against Steve’s affectionately. His boy did worry, there was no reason too this time. Steve was right, he and Amy needed rest. Amy more than him, not that she would admit it. If Shuri had suggested another round of treatment, he would have put her off. That wasn’t what she was asking for. “It’s just a meeting, Stevie. It isn’t even in the lab.”  
  
Amy’s hand found Steve’s and squeezed. She could handle a meeting. If she put her mind to it, she could probably have rallied enough for another round of scans and treatment. She was grateful she didn’t have to, but she would have for her boys.  
  
Steve curled his hand around hers. He lifted her knuckles to his lips. A meeting was alright. He could always pull rank and shut it down if he thought they were flagging. “Okay.”  
  
*****  
  
The palace council room wasn’t one Bucky spent a lot of time in. High up in the tower, the entire city stretched out beyond the windows. Inside everything was warm dark wood and soft earth toned tapestries in bold geometric patterns. The centre of the room was dominated by huge mahogany table, everyone important to Bucky sat around that table. Shuri, his little genius saviour. King T’Challa and Nakia, both of whom had been great friends to them the last few months. Even Sam and Natasha were here in a manner of speaking, their holographic presences shimmering in chairs next to Shuri and Steve. And on either side of him, straight backed like guardian statues, the loves of his life. Steve on his right Amy on his left. He was glad to have his loves close. There was something very reassuring about having his family around him.  
  
Speaking of his family. Natasha had changed her look since they had last talked face to face. His pet name didn’t fit as well anymore. He wasn’t sure that the white blonde hair would help her blend in any better that the bright red had, but it suited her. The sharp short style emphasised her stubborn jaw, the light colour brought out the intelligence in her eyes even more than the copper had. It was harsh compared to her old look, but she didn’t have to be sweet and enticing these days. She wasn’t a plaything or a tool anymore. His little girl was free, with no one to tell her how bright to shine. “Your hair looks good, _Ryzhiy_.”  
  
Natasha smiled at him and patted the softly curling ends proudly. “I’m glad you like it. Upkeep is a pain, but I like it.”  
  
Bucky relaxed a fraction. If upkeep was a pain and she was still managing to keep it looking sharp, then she was staying somewhere secure and safe enough that she had time for vanity. He knew she could take care of herself. He had taught her everything he knew, and she had learned more besides. But it was a father’s prerogative to worry about his little girl, no matter how grown up she was.  
  
“Can we get to the reason we’re all here?” Sam said, his fingers drumming an inch above the physical table.  
  
“I figured out what White Wolf’s biggest problem is.” Shuri said fiddling anxiously with her stylus.  
  
A heavy silence followed her declaration. No one wanted to be the one to break it. No one wanted to ask. It was Sam that broke the silence. Sighing and rubbing his eyes. “Lay it on us.”  
  
Steve nodded stiffly. The sooner they started, the sooner they got this over with. He shifted his hand onto Bucky’s knee. The sooner Bucky wouldn’t have to worry that he would hurt the people he cared about.  
  
Shuri pulled up a projection of Bucky’s brain, spinning and enlarging it to find the area she wanted. She jabbed her stylus at a hexagonal metal box and the wires curling out of it like tentacles. “It’s this implant. It shorts out at random intervals. That is what is causing the relapses and disassociation. I can’t figure out why it shorts out, and I haven’t been able to fry it.”  
  
“What does that mean?” Natasha ask, her frown deepening.  
  
“It needs to come out.” Shuri said evenly. That was the only solutions she could come up with. Everything else, all the other hardware in his head and body, she had found a way to neutralise in place or hijack and turn to their own purposes. This one piece was defying her.  
  
“So, what’s the problem?” Steve asked, hand tightening on Bucky’s knee. He didn’t like the idea of someone preforming more brain surgery on Bucky, but if it had to happen in had to happen. They would need Amy of course. No one else would be able to keep Bucky calm and under long enough for any major surgery.  
  
“It runs through the left temporal lobe, and the corpus callosum, and the brain stem.” Shuri drew lines along all the tendrils growing out of the box. Memory, speech, basic motor functions, involuntary processes like breathing and heartrate. The darn thing hit all of them. Shuri hated problems she couldn’t figure out.  
  
“And it has been in there long enough for large amounts of scar tissue to grow around it.” Amy drew a dagger from somewhere inside her shirt and rolled it between her fingers. Nothing was ever easy. It had to be one of the earliest implants. The stamp on the side marked it as being pre Khrushchev soviet technology. The same era as the arm. The same era as the technology that shouldn’t exist, that still didn’t exist outside of Wakanda. It was original then. It was what they had used to control him from the beginning.  
  
Nat was unnervingly still. There was only one solution. “We need a brain surgeon. A good one.”  
  
“Yeah.” Steve rubbed his eyes. It really was that simple. Sadly, simple did not mean easy. “You know a lot of black-market doctors that were top of their class, do you?”  
  
“Actually.” Amy flipped the knife in her hand. It wasn’t a simple solution, but she could make it work. “I do.”  
  
“What are you thinking, baby girl?” Bucky plucked the blade out of the air as she went to flip it again. The tanto shimmering as it caught the light. His black Fairbairn-Skyes was back in their bedroom, he should have brought it.  
  
“I think… I need a reason to visit New York.” A reason beyond question or reproach. Something that no one would question. That would give her the time she needed to make arrangements. Preferably something that could only happen in New York. Amy turned to Shuri. “Have you ever been to the Met Costume Institute Gala?”


	63. Hopes Past and Future

As soon as they got back to the suite, they tangled together on the couch, Steve with an arm around Bucky’s shoulders, Amy under his other arm, her legs across their laps. The last two days had been stressful. They all needed to unwind and watching a movie together would force them to focus on something other than what was happening. Steve had banished Amy’s laptop and even her phone.  
  
Bucky stroked Amy shin absently, his head tucked against Steve’s neck. He was enraptured by the screen. The soft pastel colours and pastoral charms. The story was sweet and hopeful. Steve was right. He liked Haku. Bucky kissed Steve’s neck. He understood wanting to protect the people he cared about, even when you didn’t remember why you cared about them. He felt warm all over as Steve absently brushed his lips against his forehead.  
  
Amy smiled, watching them was better than watching the movie. She liked these calm quiet moments. She still wasn’t sure about what they were doing. But she liked these moments. Everything almost felt simple in moments like these. She stretched lazily. Bucky grabbed her legs and pulled her further into their laps. Amy laughed and shoved him with her knee. “We should do this more often.”  
  
“I should take the people I love out on an actual date.” Steve said tracing a circle on the back of Bucky’s neck, his other hand curling protectively around Amy's ankle. They all needed more good memories, and they would have time during the next couple months while they prepared for Bucky’s surgery.  
  
Bucky leaned into the caress. A date with Steve. That ended with a goodnight kiss and maybe even more. That had been one of his favourite fantasies for longer than he could remember. With their little Fox along for the ride too, he had to have died in that bunker in Siberia, because this was heaven. As evidenced by the goddess in his lap. “How about a picnic?”  
  
Steve beamed. That was perfect. Heads together they began debating the logistics of the three of them having a picnic at the farm.  
  
Something fluttered in Amy’s stomach. Not the butterflies that she sometimes got when she thought about her boys, or the twisting she had been experiencing in the mornings from regulating Bucky’s emotions all the time. She froze, one hand creeping over the offending area. That had felt like. But no, it couldn’t be… Could it? She sat up very slowly. He brain desperately counting days. “You boys figure that out. I need to talk to Shuri.”  
  
“Amy?” Bucky turned away from Steve and the movie to look at her. Her eyes were blank. Her posture was ridged. Was she running away again for some reason? That didn't make sense. A minute ago she'd been relaxed and smiling in his hold.  
  
Steve frowned and rubbed her cheek. His girl looked like she'd just had a bad nightmare. “What’s wrong?”  
  
She shook her head. She gave them bother her best reassuring smile. Let them think it was just a sudden Idea. Let them not worry until she knew for sure. “Nothing, it’s nothing. I just need to talk to Shuri. I’ll be right back.”  
  
She managed to stop herself from running to the lab, but only barely.  
  
*****  
  
“Well?’ Amy lay still on the exam table, covering her eyes with an arm. Silly, hedonistic, girl. She had chased her own pleasure without consideration for the consequences. There were rules for a reason. No condom, no sex. It was simple. It was especially simple since she wasn’t on any sort of back up at the moment. She hadn’t had a new IUD implanted after her accident. She’d taken stupid risks with nothing to gain but temporary distraction. Stupid, reckless, irresponsible. Her teachers would never forgive her, she would never forgive herself.  
  
Shuri examined a hologram of Amy’s abdomen. “You were right. The development is good, everything where it should be. She’s a girl by the way. It looks like you’re about four months along.”  
  
“Sixteen weeks 4 days.” Amy whispered. She should have thought. She should have checked. Then she could have… Could have what? She was keeping the baby. She wasn’t in a position where she was conflicted on that point. Her family would support her. Most of them probably wouldn’t even ask who the father was. It wouldn’t matter as long as the child was hers. She was expected to give the Fox clan heirs, how she got one was less relevant. She had more than enough resources to take care of a child. And it was _Steve’s_ baby. This wasn’t the result of some one-night stand, where she had to consider whether she wanted the father involved in her life. She loved Steve. She Loved Bucky. And they loved her. There was no way they would use their child as leverage to manipulate her.  
  
“What?” Shuri looked up surprised. “You knew?”  
  
“No, but there aren’t a lot of times it could have happened. Not if I’m far enough along to notice.” Amy took a deep breath and swung her feet to the floor. She couldn’t hide in the lab forever. “I have to tell them.”  
  
Shuri bit back more questions. Amy seemed stressed enough without added pressure. Besides, White Wolf would probably tell her soon enough. This didn’t feel like a planned addition to their lives. She was curious if they had ever gotten around to discussing getting married, and what they had decided.  
  
*****  
  
The boys weren’t on the couch when Amy got back to the suite. She was surprised. She had expected them to still be in the middle of debating egg salad vs tuna for sandwiches. She found them in the armoury. Steve was wearing his uniform. Bucky was fretting and checking everything was secure and all his pockets were full.  
  
Steve smiled and shrugged on the harness for his shield. He knew it was pointless, and that Bucky disapproved of the extra weight, but he didn’t feel right going out without it. “There you are. I was worried I would have to leave before you got back.”  
  
“Leave?” Amy was having trouble focusing on any other than the news she had to share. Steve was gearing up for a mission. And all she could concentrate on were the words ‘you’re going to be a father’ sitting on the tip of her tongue.  
  
Steve accepted and extra clip from Bucky. Tucking it into a belt pouch a few slots down from the one with his compass and fox charm. He should think about getting a trinket for Bucky. Maybe a wolf, Amy and Shuri both called him wolf, even he did from time to time. “Nat caught a break on those arms dealers. Narrow window before they relocate again. We’re moving tonight. Did you want to come with us?”  
  
That broke through Amy's panic. Arms dealers. Columbia. She’d helped Nat draft the mission brief. He was going to be running headlong into danger. She couldn’t distract him right now. He needed to be sharp if he was going to come back to them. “I don’t think you’ll need me. They’re small time, even if their connections are better than average. Hurry back though. I have… news.”  
  
Steve tucked her hair behind her ear. Amy was coming back from Shuri’s lab with news. It could be huge, or it could be nothing. He wished she’d told them why she’d ducked out on them. “Is it urgent?”  
  
“It can wait until you get back.” Amy smiled. She could feel the warm presence of her other boy just behind her. “I’m telling Bucky though. He’ll figure it out anyway.”  
  
Steve beamed and gave them both one more kiss. “Something that can be figured out hmm, I can’t wait to find out what it is.”  
  
Bucky punched him in the shoulder. “Well get out of here so you can get back to us sooner.”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky let Amy fret for most of the afternoon. She had said she would tell him. She would, once she got her thoughts straight. He started to get concerned when she missed dinner but let her have another hour or so to stew, while he did his evening chores on the farm. He tracked her down on the balcony, watching the sky turn from rosy pink to black.  
  
“So, you have news. You think Steve will be excited about it, it can wait until he gets back, but I will figure it out. And despite how you acted when he was here you aren’t entirely sure about whatever it is.” Bucky leaned against the railing next to her. “What’s the problem, baby girl?”  
  
“Not a problem exactly. Just…” She smoothed a hand over her stomach trying to figure out how to word what she was thinking. “I worry that Steve puts honour ahead of practicality sometimes. I don’t want either of you to try and make any commitments for the wrong reasons.”  
  
Bucky’s eyes widened. Honour over practicality. Making commitments for the wrong reasons. That sounded like… He took a half step back, so he could take her all in. “Oh My God. You’re pregnant?”  
  
She nodded, throat tight. It sounded so real when he said it. Their lives were about to change so much. All because she had no self control when it came to her boys.  
  
“Oh My God! Amy! This is….” Hundreds of questions rushed through Bucky’s head he didn’t know where to start. “Is it Steve’s?”  
  
Amy nodded. “She has to be, I’ve only been with you and him and we know she can’t be yours.”  
  
“She?” Bucky lit up. “It’s a girl? Oh My God, Amy!” He wrapped his arm around her waist and spun her in a circle. They were going to have a baby girl. A littler Fox. What were baby foxes called? Cubs? Pups? He would figure out what to call her later.  
  
Something between a laugh and sob escaped Amy. How could she worry when he was so happy?  
  
His face fell again. He was thrilled. Of course, he was thrilled. He was just confused as to how it had happened. They hadn’t actually been together all that long, and they had taken precautions. “But when? You are always so careful. You made both of us wear condoms every time.”  
  
Amy licked her lips. That was almost true. “Except the night we got back from Volgograd.”  
  
Their first night. It had been a rushed hedonistic thing. More a blur of pleasure than anything else. Bucky stepped back to look at her again, her stomach still seemed flat, maybe the barest hint of roundness. “You can’t be that far along. You would have noticed the missed…. cycles.”  
  
Amy let out a hysterical giggle at one of the deadliest assassins in the world being unable to say the word period. So tough and intimidating in most situation but floundering in the face of normal bodily functions. “Except I haven’t had one of _those_ in over a year and they weren’t exactly regular before that.”  
  
He got over it quickly, pulling her back into his arms. How it happened wasn’t important. The important thing was they were going to have a baby. A little girl as perfect as his people were. “Amy! This is amazing.” He cut off her sceptical look with a kiss. “I know, it’s not great timing. But we’re going to figure out how to make the surgery work, and the hunt for Steve and the others is already starting to burn out, everything is going to work out. And we’re going to be a family. Trust me, baby girl."  
  
Bucky kissed her forehead. She still didn’t look convinced. He wasn’t saying it would be easy, but they would make it work. Her commitment comment rang an alarm bell in the back of his mind. Getting married would have to wait, skittish as she was, his little Fox would assume they only wanted her because of the baby. Which was the exact opposite of the truth. Steve might balk and mutter about impropriety, but he’d just have to live with it. Bucky didn’t have a problem with getting a jump on starting their family. Who knew how long the rest of their lives was going to be? Better to squeeze as much happiness in as they could.  
  
Amy cuddled herself against his chest. She really was panicking for no reason. Her boys loved her, and they would love her daughter too. “How did I get by without you?”  
  
“Slightly better than I did without you.” He kissed her head and curled his arm tightly around her. She and Steve were going to make such a beautiful baby. His family was going to be so beautiful.  
  
*****  
  
They curled up to read together before bed. It was something Bucky and Steve had started doing early on. An excuse to cuddle and unwind at the end of the day, an especially welcome one on rougher days. Amy had started joining them after her birthday, starting on the far side of the bed, then curling close to them once her feelings were out in the open. Tonight, they took advantage of Steve’s absence to indulge in one of Haruki Murakami’s surliest master pieces in the original Japanese. Amy held the book in her lap, and Bucky turned the pages. If he kissed her more than he normally would, well she needed a little reassurance and he had just discovered a new facet to his love for her.  
  
It was late when they stopped reading and snuggled down in the blankets. Steve was normally the one to dictate their bedtime. Amy pillowed her head on Bucky’s shoulder. The familiarity of the position was reassuring. Today wasn’t different from yesterday. Not really. She was loved and she was safe. A good night's sleep would help put everything in perspective.  
  
Bucky stroked the back of her hand where it rested on his chest, tracing the bones of her wrist and hand. The idea of a family had set his mind racing. “I wasn’t poor the way Steve was, you know.”  
  
Amy lifted her head to look at him. That was a very strange non-sequitur. “What’s that, _Mon Loup_?”  
  
“Shh, I’ve been remembering.” Bucky pulled her head back down to his chest. Bits and pieces had been coming back to him for months. He’d confirmed details with Steve, winning himself a bright smile every time he did. It wasn’t something he’d shared with Amy about though. They’d had other things to talk about. More important things, like their future. “My Pop owned taxis. Four cars and a garage big enough to park them and six others. We lived over that garage. Think the thing I found hardest about moving out, was falling asleep without the sound of engines downstairs. Good cars too. Clean. Respectable. It was a huge business for the neighbourhood back in the day. We were pillars of the community.”  
  
He closed his hand around her fingers again, rubbing his thumb over her wrist. “Didn’t have to worry about money. Or whether I would have a job when I was done school. I definitely never had to worry about dropping out of school to work. I was going to graduate, or my ma would have my hide.”  
  
“I went to a private Catholic school because we had money to send me to a private Catholic school.” He kissed her knuckles. That was something they had in common. She had gone to private school too. Although, he doubted she had ever been a disciplinary issue. No one would ever think about kicking her out of anywhere. “Steve was there on a scholarship. God. That damn scholarship. I was so scared he would lose it and I would lose him. He would never have survived in public school. Little punk would have had an asthma attack in the middle of a fight he had started and flat out died.”  
  
“You used to take the blame for things he did, fights he started mostly, because you thought they would kick him out if he got into trouble.” Amy cuddled closer to his side, slipping her other hand under his back. “Your sister told me.”  
  
A jolt of surprise shot through Bucky. “You talked to my sister?”  
  
Amy nodded and rubbed his chest. “I interviewed her a couple of times for my second degree. She was the lovely.”  
  
“She’s…” Bucky trailed off, licking his lips thoughtfully. Becca was almost ten years younger than him. She could still be alive.  
  
“She died, about five years ago.” Amy had never confessed her suspicions to Rebecca or her husband. She had let them believe her research into Bucky and the other Howling Commandos was just historical curiosity. The truth wouldn’t have helped anyone. “Before the whole Hydra thing.”  
  
Bucky sighed. “I don’t know if it’s better that way because she never had to know what I did, or worse because she thought I was dead all those years…”  
  
Amy tensed. Maybe she shouldn’t have said anything. Family had to be a sensitive topic, especially right now. “Baby…”  
  
“Nothing I can do either way.” Bucky kissed her hand. “Where was I?”  
  
“You were scared of losing Steve.” Amy answered, trying to relax against him again. He’d lost so much. Hydra had taken so much from him. She would do anything she could to protect him from more loss.  
  
“I’m always scared of losing Steve.” Bucky said tightly, pressing her hand to his heart. He’d been scared of losing her too, all the times she and Steve fought, the moments when had every right to walk away, it was amazing how scared considering it had only been a few months. Or maybe not, considering how hard and fast he'd fallen for her. “I made him move in with us after he lost his ma. It was stupid for him to live alone. He’d been behind on the rent for months before she passed. We had the room.”  
  
“Didn’t you live over a garage?” Amy ask sceptically. It had to be tight quarters, although knowing her Bucky, he would have thought there was enough room for Steve even if they had to sleep stacked on top of one another.  
  
“Who’s telling this story?” Bucky smiled. She saw right through him. “It was a big garage. I talked him in to staying with us until we graduated, couldn’t face the idea that brilliant Stevie might not get a chance to finish school.”  
  
“He insisted on moving out after we did graduate.” It had been a serious argument. Bucky had insisted Steve wasn’t imposing, but Steve had wanted to be independent. “I went with him. Told my parents I needed to spread my wings. Pop insisted I at least work for him. I started in the garage. Changing oil. Fixing tiers. That sort of thing. I loved that job.”  
  
He loved a lot of things about that period of his life. Everything had been so peaceful. None of the memories that had come back to him from then were traumatic. “Stevie was a shop boy for the greengrocer. I made him go to art school at night. Paid half his tuition so he could. Kept telling him he could pay me back once he was famous.” They had both known that the odds of Steve ever paying him back were practically non-existent, but the potential that Steve could be a commercial artist and earn himself a good living someday had given them both hope. Bucky would have paid all their expenses if it meant Steve got to keep doing his art.  
  
Amy cuddled closer to him. She had thought Steve was a hopeless romantic. He clearly had nothing on Bucky. “Sounds like you were happy.”  
  
“Happiest I ever thought I could be.” His mother had been impatient for him to settle down and start a family. Steve had been so sick so much of the time. And with his diabetes getting worse all the time… Bucky had figured a family could wait. That he could figure all that out after he lost the love of his life. He cupped Amy’s face tenderly, rubbing his thumb over her lips. His family had waited, even if it was nothing like what he had expected. “Until you found us.”  
  
Amy blushed and looked down. Those eyes were deadlier than anything in her armoury.  
  
“I know these last couple months have been hard. That we’ve had some unexpected surprises.” Bucky gently pressed his hand to Amy’s stomach. Some of those surprises had been better than others. “But crazy as it sounds, I love this life. And I love you. More than I ever loved that old life.”  
  
“I love you too, Bucky baby.” Amy whispered, hiding her face in his chest. Everything about this was still more than a little terrifying. Trust was hard. Being vulnerable with them was hard. She was trying.  
  
Bucky smiled and kissed the top of her head. They would get through all of this, the pregnancy, the surgery, being wanted war criminals. Love would be enough. Well love, a lot of specialist training, and what as far as he could tell, was nearly limitless wealth. Those things helped too.  
  
*****  
  
It was the middle of the afternoon when Steve finally made it back. He was exhausted and sore, but intact and home. The mission in Columbia had as well as they could have hoped. Two major arms stashes burned and a drug supply line interrupted. Nat was on her way to Florence, she had a safe house there, apparently it overlooked the Ponte Vecchio and there was an amazing bakery around the corner. Sam would be back in London, probably sitting on the terrace sipping coffee with the man he loved by now.  
  
And Steve had them both beat. He got to come home to Bucky lounging around in a sarong and Amy… Somewhere. She wasn’t in the living room, but he was sure she was around. Unless she’d had to leave for her own work. He rejected that thought as soon as it occurred. Bucky looked too calm and happy for Amy to be away. “Hey.”  
  
“Hey yourself.” Bucky grinned and vaulted the back of the back of the couch to get to him. He didn’t want to say he’d been impatient for Steve to get home. But he would admit to driving Amy mad the last couple of days with his constant staring at her stomach and inability to stop beaming. She’d pushed him off the couch while she was trying to work yesterday. He’d pulled her after him and kissed her until she’d forgotten why she was irritated with him.  
  
Steve caught Bucky’s face between his hands and kissed him fiercely. “I’ve missed you.”  
  
“I missed you too.” Bucky grinned and slipped his arm around Steve. He wondered how crazy the two of them would drive Amy. Despite Amy’s anxiety, he was sure Steve would be even happier than he was.  
  
Steve nipped at Bucky’s lips. Now that was the kind of welcome that made a guy want to hurry home. “You’re very smiley.”  
  
Bucky kissed him again. Steve was going to be such a good dad. “You will be too. Once you hear.”  
  
“Once I hear that Amy is waiting in the tub with a huge bottle of water and a sandwich?” Steve asked pulling off his jacket and tossing it over the back of the couch. Domesticity agreed with Bucky.  
  
“She is not, but she can arrange for water and a sandwich.” Amy said emerging from the dojo. She had scaled back her training a little at Bucky’s fretful insistence, but she wasn’t about to stop completely.  
  
“And a hot soak. I’m stiff, I’m sore, I just want to be wet and naked with the people I love.” Steve grabbed Amy by the hips and pulled her in against him. Kissing her down her neck in a way that forced her to bend backwards. They hadn’t spent nearly enough time in the hot tub. He and Bucky had chased Amy out most of the time when she had been scared of them. Since then all their attempts at soaking had been cut short. Which was his fault, he kept mauling one or the other of them and carrying them off to bed. He wasn’t sorry.  
  
Amy laughed and clutched at the back of his neck. He was always so ridiculous when he was first home. “We can do that.”  
  
“Shouldn’t you tell him first?” Bucky wrapped himself around her from behind, sandwiching her between them. He was excited. Steve needed to know, so that he could be equally excited. “I feel like you should tell him first.”  
  
Amy reached back to run her hand through his hair. “We said it could wait and it can wait.”  
  
“Hmmm.” Bucky frowned. He didn’t want to argue. He did want to see Steve’s face when he found out.  
  
Amy sighed, and turned around in Steve’s hold. His arms tightened automatically, pressing her close. Amy looked up at Bucky and his excited face, he was going to vibrate to pieces at this rate. “Do you want to tell him?”  
  
“No.” Bucky relented, tucking her hair behind her ear. She was the one doing the heavy lifting here. “It should be you.”  
  
“Tell me what?” Steve growled playfully, nuzzling against her neck. Speculating on what her news could be had entertained the team on their flight back from Columbia. Natasha had insisted that it was probably the CIA decision to move the man hunt to Southeast Asia. Sam thought she had probably found a way to move them to Japan without arousing suspicion. Both or those sounded reasonable, but Steve had his money on it being something more personal.  
  
“I don’t know. I’m kind of enjoying this now.” Amy giggled letting him lift her off her feet in his enthusiasm.  
  
“Why don’t we grab that bottle of water, then we’ll go soak and I’ll spend some time convincing you.” They really should spend more time relaxing in the hot tub, but they had lots of time to do that. If Amy needed convincing, he would convince her. Even if it was all a game. Especially if it was a game.  
  
Bucky was hypnotised. His people wrapped in each other’s arms, smiling like the world couldn’t touch them. There was so much domestic bliss in the moment. A nearly perfect family image. Not nearly perfect. Perfect. “Amy’s pregnant.”  
  
Amy tried to glare at him. The effect was completely ruined by the fact she couldn’t stop her lips from curling up in a smile. “What happened to _I_ should be the one to tell him?”  
  
“I should be sorry. I’m not.” Bucky kissed her, pulling her out of Steve’s arms at the same time. He cuddled his chest into her back, beaming at Steve. “Amy’s pregnant.”  
  
“You’re what?” Steve looked down at her. The waist under his hands had been tiny. Everything about Amy was tiny. Bucky towered over her, not even stretching to rest his chin on her head. His wrist twice as thick as Amy’s where his hand covered hers.  
  
Amy rubbed her stomach, Bucky’s hand moving with hers. She could feel the foetus wiggling, the sensation still unnerving. “Four months. Do you want to know if it’s a boy or a girl?”  
  
“It’s a girl.” Bucky blurted. Their little girl. She would grow up safe and loved, with nothing to worry about as long he had anything to say in the matter.  
  
Amy sighed and looked up at him exasperated. “Aren’t you a world class spy and assassin? Trained to resist all kinds of interrogation and never give up information.”  
  
Bucky ducked his head and nuzzled her ear. He was excited enough that she was lucky he wasn't shouting from the rooftops. “I have a brain thing.”  
  
“You’re…. I… A girl… She’s…” Steve felt more than a little blindsided. Amy was pregnant. They were going to have a child. They were going to have a little girl. He set his hand on Amy’s stomach. “We’re going to have a baby?”  
  
“A beautiful healthy baby girl.” Amy said laying her and Bucky’s linked hands over his.  
  
Beautiful. Healthy. Theirs… His… Steve looked up at Bucky. “What if she turns out like me?”  
  
Bucky's face fell. Every memory he had of Steve as a child he had rushed back to him. All the trouble they had gotten into. The exasperation they had caused their mothers. “Oh hell. I hadn’t even considered. Is it too soon to start childproofing?”


	64. Living the Life

Steve leaned back with a sigh. Fed, hydrated, still not showered, but feeling a lot better, her relaxed into the couch. Amy had made him a sandwich, working around the complication of Steve being reluctant to let her go and Bucky perched on the counter by the cutting board. After that, they had insisted he strip to his boxers and sit on the couch with his sandwich and the bottle of water he had thought was so important an hour ago. Bucky had stolen his belt while he was eating and was off refilling the pockets to replace the things he had used. Amy had taken charge of the rest of his uniform and was checking it over for tears and stains. She had offered to get him a new mission outfit. He had turned her down. As much as he had loved the sleek dark sneak suit she had given him last year, it was still in his room in the Avengers compound, and he couldn’t think of a reasonable explanation for where he would have found another one that didn’t involve her.  
  
He studied Amy as she cleaned the leaf stains off his mission jacket. He couldn’t tell how she was taking the news. Bucky had said it himself; she was skittish. She seemed calm, but she almost always seemed calm… Until she wasn’t. She caught him staring and raised an eyebrow. Steve grinned sheepishly. He might not be able to reliably read her, but she could read him.  
  
Amy set aside the jacket and settled herself in Steve’s lap. The jacket was going to need to soak in vinegar anyway. It looked like he had been rolling around in the jungle foliage. “You’re worried I’m freaking out.”  
  
Steve curled his hands gently around her waist. It was still too small for him to fully believe this was happening. He wanted it to be happening. He wanted them to have a family and a life together. They had been close to that before, and every time they got close, Amy pulled away. “In my defence…”  
  
“I know.” Amy took one of his hands and linked her fingers through his. Lifting his hand and rubbing her cheek against the back. “I’m not used to this loving and committed relationship thing.”  
  
“We get it.” Bucky said leaning against the wall by the hallway. He had been watching the two of them, heart full of love. He wrapped his arm around Amy from behind, slipping his hand under her shirt. She’d been burned before. They would look after her. No one was more protective than Steve. “Better get used to it though, little Fox. You’re stuck with us.”  
  
Amy leaned back into him, still anchored to Steve by their linked hands. “Stuck with you?”  
  
“Mhmm.” Bucky confirmed sliding his hand higher. Steve wanted to get married. Bucky just wanted to be with them. “We’re keeping you, faults and all. Ours and yours.”  
  
Steve wrapped his arms around both of them, holding them close. Faults and all definitely summed up their relationship. Everything had been more complicated than it should have. They had each other now. Their little family was coming together. Everything was out of order, but it was coming together.  
  
*****  
  
Steve leaned as casually against the door to the dojo. The pregnancy hadn’t slowed their girl down at all. Neither had Steve’s efforts to keep her awake all night. He had let her sleep in at least. Only indulging in one soft kiss on her cheek before his run. Bucky had done the same on his way to the farm.  
  
Now he was back from his work out, and she was awake and firmly in the middle of hers. Steve had loved watching her fight since the first time he’d seen it, and it was even better when she wasn’t in any danger. She was beautiful, dancing around the training dummy in the middle of the space. Beautiful, but he didn’t think calm. There was a too violent edge to her attacks. An almost frantic sharpness to her movements in place of her smooth controlled grace. He wasn’t sure if he was getting better at reading her, or if she was just bothered enough for it to show.  
  
She struck the target, hard enough to send it skittering back a few feet.  
  
Steve broke the silence. “You want to talk about it?”  
  
“Talk about what?” Amy asked, stalking a circle around the still rocking target.  
  
“Pretty sure there is only one thing worrying you right now.” Steve slipped all the way into the room.  
  
That was true. For all the complicated and dangerous things happening in the world, there had only been one thing on her mind for the past few days. There was not a doubt in her mind that it was the same thing on Steve’s. “Pretty sure I told you I’m fine.”  
  
“You said you know why I’m worried about you. Which isn’t the same thing.” Steve had let it slide last night. It had been enough to relive his anxieties for a few hours and he’d been intent on showing her exactly how pleased and excited he was by the news. Something Bucky had been more than happy to help with. This morning it wasn’t enough. This morning he needed to know she really was alright, not just putting on a brave face for him.  
  
Amy bit her lip, pushing her hair back from her face. It wasn’t. Not quite. “I’m not not fine. It is... a lot. A lot I didn't plan for.”  
  
Steve lowered himself onto the bench. That was what he thought. “Run it for me.”  
  
“What?” Amy laughed, turning to face him.  
  
“You’re worried about it. Let’s run the worst-case scenario,” Steve stretched his legs out in front of him, leaning back and crossing his ankles. “See if we can’t troubleshoot it.”  
  
Amy dropped her eyes, looking down at the wooden sword in her hand and her body, there was no visible outward sign of her condition yet. Just an occasional butterfly soft fluttering. The worst-case scenario... “Do you think I could handle it on my own?”  
  
Steve frowned, reaching out to take her free hand. “Why would you have to?”  
  
Amy bit her lip. Because of the thing she had been trying very hard not to think about for the last few weeks. Because she still wasn’t entirely convinced this was real. “If you and Bucky figure out you don’t need me.”  
  
“That is _never_ going to happen.” Steve drew her closer, kissing the pulse point on the inside of her wrist. He couldn’t blame his girl for being worried about the future. Not with something as life altering as their child coming out of nowhere. But he knew that particular fear was completely groundless. “But let’s focus on the logistics. If something happens to Bucky and me -I die, something happens Bucky’s surgery, anything- then you will go home to Japan. You’ll have Dai and Kiki, your family. I want to raise our kid with you, Amy. But if I can’t? A nanny and a full staff can handle a lot of the little things. And you can absolutely handle the big things.”  
  
Steve reached up and brushed his thumb tenderly over Amy’s cheek. The plan to not rock the boat until Amy was comfortable had gone out the window. At least the fundamental facts hadn’t changed. “I love you. Bucky loves you. Nothing is going to change that. Nothing.” He kissed her knuckles softly to emphasise the word. “I’m spending the rest of my life with you. I’m with you till the end of the line. But if something -and it would have to be a big something- takes us away from you, you won’t be alone, and our baby will always be surrounded by people who love her.”  
  
Amy lowered herself into Steve’s lap, letting him wrap his arms around her and anchor her there. “I’m scared. I don’t want to mess this up.”  
  
“I know. Me to.” Steve whispered, kissing her temple as he tucked her head against his neck. Excited. Happier than he had thought possible. But also completely terrified he wouldn’t know what to do. That fear was easier to handle when she was in his arms. “We’ll figure it out.”  
  
*****  
  
The sound of Steve’s pencil scratching against his sketch book was one he had always found soothing. It was even more soothing as he indulged in sketching Amy and Bucky. They were gorgeous, lounging in a nest of pillows on the living room floor. Ostensibly, they were reading a book on pregnancy and infant care. Something they had been working on sporadically for the last month. In reality, they had both figured out what he was doing and started posing for him. Bucky had Amy in his lap, his hand resting protectively on the now visible swell of her stomach. That hand was why Steve had given up on work to draw them. They were just too perfect together for him to resist committing them to paper. The soft wave of her hair tumbling over her shoulder. The curve of Bucky’s cheek where it pressed against her neck. The romantic way Bucky’s thumb had slipped over hers as soon as she touched his hand.  
  
Amy lowered the book, closing her eyes and setting her hand over Bucky’s. There was something very distracting about having an independent life inside you. The bigger and more restless she got the more distracting she was.  
  
Steve captured the moment, updating his sketch with a few bold lines. Amy’s left hand over Bucky’s right, it was too perfect. He tapped his eraser against the page, carefully considering his next alteration. It wasn’t true to life, but it felt right. Two lines, the tiniest bit of shading, and a ring glinted on Amy’s finger. A plain band. Simple and pure.  
  
Amy's phone rang, vibrating on the coffee table. She checked the caller ID. It was late for anyone who knew where she was to be calling. Dai. Not the emergency number. Probably just filling her in on what was happening with the Brunei delegation. She rolled out of Bucky’s hold with a sigh. “Sorry lovelies, I’ve got to take this.”  
  
“Problems?” Steve looked up at her with worried curiosity. Late night calls were trouble, they had meant one of them leaving more times than he cared to think about. Amy had responsibilities, but she wasn’t in any condition to go throwing herself into danger these days. He could go for her if she needed him to.  
  
“Shouldn’t be anything serious.” Amy assured him, lifting her phone to her ear and heading towards the dojo. It might not be a problem, but she sensed frustrated pacing in her near future. Pacing that would be significantly more tolerable with a sword. “Dai? Did they agree to the changes in the treaty?”  
  
Steve shook his head as she left. She might hate playing politics almost as much as he did, but she was a lot better at it.  
  
“So, how’d your drawing go?” Bucky asked, hauling himself off the floor to lean against the edge of the desk. He had always loved Steve’s art. He would have worked his fingers to the bone to keep him in art supplies if Steve would have let him back in the day. Their girl would make sure that he never ran out now. Behind the desk Amy’s portrait looked down on them benevolently, a testament to what Steve could achieve without financial limitations.  
  
“Take a look.” Steve tossed the book across to him. It was a good likeness. He thought he’d captured the soft curve of Bucky’s smile, and the graceful angles of Amy’s legs.  
  
Bucky ran his fingers down the page. It was beautiful. The little details lovingly rendered. The ring looked good there, the little glint drew the eye and filled him with a feeling of rightness. It belonged there. A dark thought snuffed out the feeling. The reason she had spent hours that first night standing on the balcony worrying instead of throwing herself into his arm with unbridled joy. She didn’t want them making commitments for ‘the wrong reasons’. “You can’t show her this.”  
  
“Why not?” Steve’s hand tightened on his pencil. It was a good proposal. Soft, thoughtful, inclusive of both of them. It wasn’t rushed like his last one had been. It didn’t demand anything from her. He’d pair it with a speech about his feelings. About how he loved them and wanted to spend the rest of their lives together. About how happy they would be together, as a family.  
  
Bucky closed the sketchbook gently. It wasn’t the right time. Too much had changed in their lives since Steve had asked him. “She’ll think it’s because of the baby.”  
  
Steve’s pencil snapped in his hand. “It’s not. You know it’s not.”  
  
“Doesn’t matter what I know. What matters is what she thinks.” Bucky said softly. This would count as ‘the wrong reasons’, at least in her mind. Whatever their actual intentions, beautiful, fierce, intelligent Amy, would jump to the worst possible conclusion. It was what she did, and he couldn’t do anything but love her for it. It had kept her alive long enough to find them.  
  
Steve sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. She would think that because she knew him. It wasn’t _just_ because of the baby. He might not be as old fashioned as she had accused him of being in the past, but his Ma had raised him to be a gentleman. He couldn’t even imagine what she would say if he found out he’d gotten a girl pregnant and hadn’t done ‘the right thing’. Hell, if his Ma had ever learned about half the things he did with Amy, she’d frog march them to the nearest church in a heartbeat. And as much as he hated to admit it, his Ma would have a point. “If we don’t get married before the baby comes…”  
  
“She won’t be any less loved, Steve.” Bucky reassured him, coming around the desk to stroke his hair. “And these days… people do things out of order all the time. It won’t affect her future.” Amy’s mother was the daughter of the Emperor’s mistress not his wife and look how well she and her children had done for themselves. Money and connections were protection. Amy had enough of both to shelter their little girl from the worst the world could throw at her. At least the worst the civilised world could throw at her. She would need a different kind of protection from the rougher parts, but they could handle that too.  
  
“At least not any more than having us for parents in the first place. I just…” Steve trailed off, unsure how to word exactly what he wanted. Them, and the truly impossible life that went along with them. He wanted to get it _right_. For once in his life he wanted the normal domestic part to be the easy part. It wouldn’t be easy. Even if Amy said yes and they got married in the next couple of months, it wouldn’t change anything. Not really. They were on the run. Any connection to them put Amy and the baby at risk. Their baby more than Amy. People would try to use her to get to them. They would be in danger. All of them. Because if anything happened to their girl, Steve wouldn’t even try to stop Bucky from doing terrible things to the perpetrator, he’d do some pretty terrible things himself. And he would hate himself for putting them in danger in the first place.  
  
“I know Stevie.” Bucky pulled him into a hug, tucking Steve’s head against his chest. He held his guy protectively close, letting Steve feel the frustration. Steve always held him when he was frustrated, for as long as he needed. He could repay the favour. “We’ll figure it out. It’s just going to take some time.”  
  
*****  
  
As much as Steve would have like to, they couldn’t spend all their time lounging around kissing and pampering each other. They all had responsibilities. Bucky had the farm, which required several hours of attention every day, feeding and taking care of the animals, tending the crops, the little maintenance tasks required to keep the hut semi-liveable. Amy had work, both as an ambassador to an emerging nation, and her academic work too. Steve was sure she was doing some work for the Fox clan too, and possibly for her brothers, but it never seemed to be what she was doing when he looked over her shoulder. And Steve had work, which for him meant leaving the people he loved here and letting people shoot at him.  
  
Or hiding in a stairwell to avoid having them shoot at him. Sam had a nasty cold and Wanda had exams, which left them shorthanded. To compensate they were doing this a quietly as possible. Steve was getting better at doing things quietly. Even if he did miss bursting through the front door guns blazing after an hour of sneaking where he had only advanced four stories. At least he was on the right floor now. Pressed against a wall listening to muffled inane chatter through the door because the patrol he needed to avoid had stopped to gossip outside his hiding place, but on the right floor. He didn’t even have anyone to roll his eyes at since he and Natasha had split up.  
  
*****  
  
Natasha ducked around a corner and out of sight of a group of office workers. A third person would have made this much easier. Steve’s plan would work, but the need to infiltrate the two terminals at the same time left them irritatingly without overwatch. Someone with a scope on the other side of the street pointing out roving civilians would be very helpful. Why the civilians were even here was beyond her. It was ten at night. They should be home with their families. She hoped Steve was having more luck getting into place.  
  
Workers safely on their way, Nat darted across the hall and boosted herself through a ceiling tile and into a more secure cover. Floating ceilings were a mixed blessing. They offered excellent concealment, no one ever looked up, but they were never secured to the actual ceiling reliably enough to be useful over long distances. “One room away.”  
  
“Hang on, I’m stuck waiting for the guards to finish… I don’t know comparing notes on the Bachelor or something.” Steve sounded frustrated even over radio. She pitied him. He couldn’t take shortcuts through the ceiling like she could, and it was a lot harder to hide his bulk in the shadows. Between that and his lack of practice, he was slow at this, and being slow drove him crazy.  
  
She crawled forwards carefully, listening as she went. Her target room was silent. Natasha slipped a remote camera through the ceiling to take a look around.  
  
“Surprised you didn’t bring Amy with you.” If Nat was in her position, she would be absolutely stir-crazy by now. This little data theft and liberation shouldn’t be discovered for at least a week. She could have joined in with minimal risk to her cover. Steve should have brought her along just so she could stretch her legs. Besides which, Amy would have been a God send. Steve could have taken up position for overwatch, and Amis would be in place by now. She would have solved half their problems all on her own.  
  
“It’s going to be a few months before I let her tag along.” Steve snorted. It sounded like he was moving again. That was good.  
  
“Why?” The camera feed looked good, she switched to thermal view scanning slowly around the room. “Are you mad at her?” Nat asked curiously. Last she had heard, everything was coming up roses. With the exception of their conference to discuss his need for surgery, it had been a been a few weeks since she had talked to her _Otets_. But when she had, he’d sounded overwhelmingly happy. The way he told it, Aims was madly in love with both of them and everything had fallen into blissful place like some kind of fairy tale. She wouldn’t be overly surprised to discover that he’d exaggerated, especially since he had been actively avoiding talking about how his treatments were going.  
  
The room was clear, she pushed aside the tile and dropped onto a desk. If Steve was moving, she might as well get into place.  
  
*****  
  
“No, she’s… uhh…” The security patrol had finally moved on, and Steve had slipped down the hall to the office he was after with minimal difficulty. He ducked down next to the locked door. At this point Nat’s questions were more of a problem than the next stage of the mission. Steve had honestly thought one of the others would tell Nat. “She’s pregnant. We’re going to have a baby.”  
  
“Steve!” Natasha sounded genuinely excited. Steve could perfectly picture her stopping what she was doing and looking up in surprise. “Remind me to hug you when we’re back in the same room.”  
  
“Yeah,” Steve chuckled. An excited Natasha was such a strange thing. “A girl. Bucky it ecstatic. He can’t stop smiling.”  
  
"How's Aims taking it?"  
  
Steve made a face. That was the question. She seemed happy. A calm, quiet happy. She wanted to write poetry, while he and Bucky wanted to throw her a parade. "Well. I think. She seems happy. She's reading the Book of Five Rings to the baby."  
  
*****  
  
That made Nat’s smile soften into something soft and warm. Her _Otets_ had been such a good father. She could hardly imagine what he would be like if he got to raise a child in peace and safety. She loved Clint’s kids, she would love her younger sister just as much. Steve and Amy’s daughter would be a handful. She would need someone to help her get into trouble. Nat couldn’t wait.  
  
She drummed her fingers against the desk weighting for the decryption program to breach the firewall. Local networks were all well and good, except when exploiting one loophole allowed you to get into multiple terminals. She just had to wait for her program to find the right algorithm.  
  
She missed having all the resources S.H.I.E.L.D. had given them. In a past life, she and Steve wouldn’t be the ones doing this. They would have sent in a standard strike team and save her all this waiting. Steve wondered why she always bugged him about his personal life when they were on missions. It was because she was _bored_. Thankfully, Steve had given her an excellent distraction this time. “When’s the wedding?”  
  
****  
  
Did anyone not know him? Steve sighed and hung his head. He sincerely wished it was as easy as picking a day. He was going to marry them. They just had a few details to work out. Like how and when to ask Amy. “We’re waiting.”  
  
“Scared Aims will say no again?” Nat asked evenly. He heard her typing and plugged in his phone. “Synchronising.”  
  
“Synchronising. And maybe a little.” Steve watched his readout for Nat’s signal. The countdown started and he entered the first command.  
  
*****  
  
Steve carefully closed the fire door behind him and reattached the alarm. He scanned the alley. Depressing, dank, empty. Just the way he liked them. He wondered vaguely how allies everywhere managed to have the same slightly sour smell of old rainwater. He whistled an all clear. The first time he had suggested the signal Natasha had given him a strange look. That look had made a lot more sense once he found out Bucky had trained her. It had been Bucky’s preferred all clear back in the war.  
  
Nat dropped out of a ventilation shaft above his head. Hauling a backpack with her.  
  
Steve pulled the civilian clothing she tossed him on over his uniform. Hoodie, jacket, baggy pants, baseball cap, his usual incognito disguise. Nat was already changed. Knowing her, she’d probably already checked the camera in their car to make sure their getaway was clean. He settled the hat low on his forehead and slung the backpack over his shoulder. “Good to go.”  
  
“We are in the same place. No one is trying to kill us. Get over here you big idiot.” Nat held out her arms and beckoned. With everything that had happened this year, it was nice to finally have something unambiguously good news.  
  
Steve picked her up and spun her around. Bucky might not be the only one who couldn’t stop smiling. His cheeks were starting to ache from all the grinning he was doing in his downtime.  
  
“God, Steve. You’re going to be such a good father.” Nat squeezed Steve as tightly as she could. Her feet fully off the ground. She didn’t care. She didn’t even really care that hugging him like this left them both vulnerable. The alley was reasonably secure and sometimes it was worth a little vulnerability to share a moment.  
  
“Thanks Nat.” Steve set her back on her feet. Her vote of confidence meant a lot. She was the most competent person he knew. If she thought he could do this, he had to believe her. He needed to talk to Bucky and Amy first, but he was pretty sure that she was going to end up as Godmother.  
  
*****  
  
The living room was empty when Steve arrived back in Wakanda. He tried not to sulk. There was no reason for him to expect a hero’s welcome. If he’d called ahead maybe, but they only had a vague time frame for when he’d be home tonight. Still, he thought as he dropped his gear in the armoury, it would have been nice for them to spend the evening on the couch. He poked his head into the bedroom on the off chance there was a surprise waiting for him there. Nothing fun, just a perfectly made bed looking inviting. He would fall into it, but he needed food first. Preferably food and a kiss. Assuming he could find either of the people who would kiss him.  
  
The sound of laughter drew him towards the dojo. Steve was going to be very displeased if he found them sparing. Amy was _pregnant_. He couldn’t be the only responsible one here. They all had to look out for each other. That meant not letting their girl over tax herself, and not putting Bucky in a position where he might need her to calm him down. How hard was it to not take any stupid risks for three days?  
  
“Why are we still doing this, you’re not going to win.” That was Bucky sounding cocky. Steve could almost see him circling, smirk firmly on his face, eyes glinting.  
  
“I don’t lose.” Amy, light, and teasing. She would station herself in the centre of the room, force him to move around her.  
  
A deep thud, metal on wood followed her words. Steve picked up his pace a little. Sparing he could just about get on board with. Amy got bored running drills and Bucky would never deliberately put her in danger. But live steel? Amy couldn’t be _that_ bored. Accidents happened, even to people as skilled as they were.  
  
Steve skidded to a stop in the door of the dojo, scanning the room frantically. If they were sparing with live steel, he couldn’t just charge in, that really would put them in danger. The scene that met his eyes wasn’t the chaos he had feared. Bucky was leaning against the wall, casually flipping a knife into the air over and over. The smirk was there. Mischievous and wolfish and with just a touch of arousal, all directed at their girl. Beautiful amazing Amy. Standing with her back to Bucky, about a yard away from the wall, a knife of her own flashing in her hand, Amy’s gaze was locked on a target on the far side of the room. A target already bristling with blades all neatly aligned in what looked like a perfect one-inch grid.  
  
Amy flicked her wrist, the knife thudded into place. Three inches left of centre, perfectly finishing off a row.  
  
Not sparing. Competing at knife throwing. Nice, relatively safe, low impact knife throwing. It smelled of compromise. Like they had both needed to burn off energy and this was the safest thing they could agree on. Steve sighed and leaned against the door frame. He was paranoid for ever doubting them. He loved them, and this was part of why. They were both so fierce, fragile and resilient at the same time. Perfect for each other, and for him. “What does a guy have to do to get a welcome home kiss around here?"


	65. An Unexpected Coffee Date

Exams were harder than Wanda had expected. It wasn’t the tests themselves. One of the things Natasha and the others had done a good job of teaching her was how to efficiently study and retain information. It was the atmosphere on campus. Everyone was so stressed. She had to be extra vigilant and keep a tight rein on her powers or it started to affect her. Seriously, the pre-mission Avengers weren’t as stressed as undergrads. Or maybe they were just better at controlling their minds.  
  
She hefted her bag, so it sat more comfortably on her shoulder and started down the strand. At least she had the morning off, her first exam wasn’t until two tomorrow. She could sleep in, have a lazy breakfast, avoid the rush hour crush on the tube, write a couple hundred words on hotel regulations in the EU, then it was just a matter of meeting her friends at the pub to celebrate surviving the week.  
  
Friends her own age were a revelation. They had seemed young the first few weeks. Innocents who had never suffered or had to fight for survival like she had. Then she had gotten to know them, settled into her life. They were bright and vibrant, full of life and spirit. And they all accepted that she was one of them. She didn’t have to suffer or fight. She was pampered and protected child. Life was easy and kind. She was happy, even if life as an Avenger had been more exciting. She still got to do that sporadically, which kept this life from getting bland.  
  
She skirted a group of people waiting for the bus, heels clicking on the stone pavers. She loved how anonymous she was here, just one of a dozen women wearing the same semi casual uniform of peacoat, jeans, and ankle boots. She hadn’t been invisible like this since before she lost her parents. Pietro would have loved it too.  
  
A tall figure separated from the crowd. Weaving through the people on the street and stepping in front of her. “Hello Wanda.”  
  
“I think you have the wrong person.” Wanda managed to keep her expression smooth. She was trained for this. That wasn’t her name. She didn’t know anyone with that name. She side stepped him without looking up, mentally remapping her route home so she could lose a tail. She hated changing trains, but she would have to. And she’d need a viable excuse, her relaxing afternoon was shot. She was going to have to go shopping.  
  
“I don’t think I do.” He stepped in front of her again, movements graceful, almost like he was floating.  
  
“What—” She knew that voice. She didn’t know this tall blonde man with this slightly ruddy complexion. She looked up. Straight into bright green eyes. She definitely knew those eyes. “Vis?”  
  
“We should get a coffee.” He touched her arm softly. “That’s what people do isn’t it? When they want to talk.”  
  
“Vis… If you’re going to arrest me, just arrest me. I won’t tell you where the others are.” She held out her arms, wrists together. Talking wouldn’t make anything better. It would be easier if they just got it over with. “I’ll come quietly. Tell them they don’t have to drug me this time.”  
  
“I am not here to arrest you.” Vision almost whispered. The reassuring words just loud enough for Wanda to here.  
  
“You’re not?” She lowered her arms cautiously. He didn’t look like an Avenger right now. He had made himself look human. His features were just as striking covered in human skin as they were in his natural red and silver. There was nothing intimidating about his clothing either. No uniform, just casual clothes. His slacks and sweater combination still made him look like a suburban dad, although the addition of a wool overcoat made him more of a yummy daddy.  
  
“No. I—I really would like to talk.” He smiled at her earnestly. A bubble of cautious hope forming inside him. She could have pushed him into the ground and made a break for it, again. She hadn’t.  
  
She couldn’t say no to him when he looked at her like that. They could talk first. Then she would figure out what to do about being discovered.  
  
*****  
  
Wanda curled her hands around her mug. She had liked the cute little café just off the Strand. Her English composition study group used to take over the largest table once a week. She would miss it. There was no way she would be able to keep this cover now that Vision had found her. She probably wouldn’t even be able to maintain an independent cover. Best case scenario she would move in with Nat and trail around after her like a child. Worst case scenario they would send her back to Wakanda and she would sit around kicking her heels while they kept her ‘safe’… Well, second worst case. Worst case she ended up back in her cell in the raft. The thought of being drugged like that again chilled her skin, even with the burning hot London Fog between her palms.  
  
“So, how did you find me?” She asked, fiddling with her teabag. Little bubbles of milk foam clung to it as it bobbed. It really was the little things. If she went with Natasha, she could probably find a new café, and even in Wakanda there was milk and tea. It wouldn’t be the same.  
  
“You have a distinctive writing style. I periodically scanned plagiarism checkers and major publications in to find you.” Her essay on ethical tourism had been a work of art. He would have read excerpts of it to anyone who would listen if it wouldn’t have gotten her into trouble.  
  
“I’ll have to work on that.” Not that it really mattered. Her next cover was unlikely to involve any writing. Wanda pulled out her tea bag and set it on the provided saucer.  
  
“I doubt anyone else would have been able to locate you. I had significant motivation.” Vision smiled at her, nervously adjusting his own mug of plain black coffee. He didn’t need to eat or drink, but it would have been strange for him to sit with Wanda without a drink of his own.  
  
Wanda smoothed her features again, studying him carefully. What constituted ‘significant motivation’? This was one of those times where she wished she had Nat in the back of her head. She was reasonably sure that people who were hunting you didn’t generally look at you like you were a priceless treasure.  
  
Vision cleared his throat, awkward in the silence. He was always awkward when it came to human things. He was much better when it came to facts and figures. He was especially bad at small talk. Or maybe it was that small talk was strange in this situation. It hadn’t been all that long since their fight at the airport and her arrest after all. “Why did you… choose this program…”  
  
Wanda shook her head. Just sitting here was breaking all the rules Steve and Natasha had laid out for the team. “You know I can’t answer that.”  
  
He reached across the table to touch her hand. The bright beat of her pulse thrilling through his fingers as he stroked her wrist. It was just possible that his attempt at small talk was miss guided. Perhaps they would be better off cutting to the chase. “I miss you.”  
  
“You had me arrested, Vis.” Wanda pulled her hand away from him, folding it in her lap. She used to like the feel of his hand on hers, now it reminded her of her last moments of freedom before they had taken her in to custody. “They put me in a straight-jacket and drugged me until I couldn’t think.”  
  
Vision’s face fell. He knew. He’d seen the tapes from the breakout. They had broken his heart. Killing Wanda’s vivaciousness. Shutting down her beautiful mind. That was more of a crime than anything she had done. At least in his opinion. “I didn’t know they would do that to you. You must believe that.”  
  
“I do, Vis.” Wanda traced the handle of her mug. “But that doesn’t mean it didn’t hurt.”  
  
“I am sorry, Wanda.” He had presumed too much turning her over without asking what they would do last time. He had hurt her. One short conversation wouldn’t make up for that. She needed to be the one to take the lead. Vision set his hand on the table again, palm up. She could take it or not. It was her decision.  
  
She set her hand in his and looked up to meet his gaze, accepting the peace offering for what it was. They sat together like that for long moments. Not talking. Just holding each other’s hands and studying expressions.  
  
Wanda blushed and dropped her eyes. There was never any guile in the way he looked at you. Vision was always so sweetly earnest. It was one of her favourite things about him. “We can’t talk about me. What have you been doing?”  
  
Vision obliged her attempt at changing the subject, telling her all about his day to day life under the new UN run Avengers. He focused on the little details. There were a hundred little stories about people they both knew. Lilian from accounting was getting married. They were reevaluating their pen supplier, Tony had devised an elaborate trial to rank the options based on longevity, ink quality and colour, environmental impact, and economic value. Anita from Human resources had developed a crush on Rhody, that was providing no end of amusing anecdotes. There was talk of hosting a summer camp for under privileged children.  
  
He avoided more sensitive topics. How strange the residential wing felt without her there. The way Tony had taken to obsessively carrying around the flip phone Captain Rogers had sent him. The search for her and the rest of the fugitives.  
  
And the entire time he held her hand, gently stroking his thumb over her knuckles.  
  
Eventually the conversation lapsed. The new silence that settled over them was much easier than the one that had come before. Wanda looked down at her mug, it had been empty for a while. She wasn’t ready for their coffee to end. It was stupid, and reckless, and she didn’t really care. “Do you want to take a walk”  
  
Vision held the door for her. Wanda smiled up at him shyly. It was good to see him again. Whatever happened.  
  
They fell into step easily. Arms bumping together. “How long do we have before they wonder why you’re hanging around London and follow your tracker.”  
  
“I turned off my tracker.” Vision answered absently, he was a little distracted by the way her knuckles had brushed against his.  
  
That surprised Wanda. Not that he could turn off his tracker. She would have been more surprised if they had come up with one he couldn’t turn off. That they hadn’t panicked and launched a massive man hunt to find them. “What did you tell them?”  
  
“That I needed some time away.” He had been worried that someone would ask what he was going to do with his time. Deception didn’t come naturally to him. He would have struggled to come up with a valid reason why he needed to take personal time.  
  
“And it was that easy?” Wanda asked sceptically. If it was that easy, Steve and Bucky would be living in Katsura with no one hunting them. Nat would be safely at the compound, keeping things running smoothly. Sam would be… probably exactly where he was, happily living with the man he loved.  
  
“Mr. Stark has been…” Vision weighed his words carefully. Tony had been a mess the past few months. Worried that everything was his fault. Devastated by what he saw as Steve’s betrayal. Overly attentive when it came to how the remaining Avengers were feeling. “…Very accommodating the last few months. I believe he regrets his actions in Germany.”  
  
“We all regret Germany.” Wanda dropped her eyes to the sidewalk in front of her. What had happened, if not the actual decision.  
  
Their meandering walk lead them to the Middle Temple Gardens. This early in the spring the Park still looked a little barren, but buds were starting to show, there was promise in the air. It could be the warming weather, or it could be something else. Vision took Wanda’s hand and drew her into the shelter of a branching oak, leaves just starting to fill in.  
  
“I should never have let them drug you like that.” Vision brushed her cheek. He had let her down. She had needed help and he had let someone else be there for her. “I should have been the one to break you out when they did.”  
  
“Vis…” Wanda didn’t know what she was going to say. There weren’t words to explain what she was feeling. She slipped her hand around the back of his neck and pulled his face down towards her. Their lips found each other easily.  
  
It was a different kiss from the few they had shared before everything went mad. Those had been shy, tentative things. Little pecks on the lips, quickly withdrawn, followed by stammering blushes. This kiss was still tinged with anxious nerves, but there were brighter sparks of fire and passion in it. His hands found the small of her back as she melted against him. She hadn’t noticed the almost metallic taste of his lips before. Somehow, she knew that was uniquely him.  
  
Wanda stepped back hesitantly. She was surprised how cold the air was outside of the shelter of his arms. The day hadn’t felt particularly bitter before. Suddenly she was freezing. It would be so easy to press herself back against his firm warmth, kiss him again. “I should go.”  
  
“Can I see you again?” Vision asked sincerely. His fingers toyed with the cuff of her coat sleeve. His mind toyed with the idea of pulling her back into his arms and flying them away from here.  
  
“I…” Wanda considered. She wanted to see him again. They had been so close before the accords ruined everything. Viz understood what it was like to be stronger than everyone and still have no idea what you were doing. Meeting in London was too big of a risk though. The safety net Natasha and Amy had built for her cut both ways. There was no way she could take him back to her apartment and if they spent too much time together in public someone in one of the networks keeping an eye on her would spot them. “Yes, but not here.”  
  
Vision slipped her a card with a website on it. She recognised it as a secure dark web chat site. Not something hosted on Stark servers. Somewhere digital and safe. “Don’t check it too often. I’ll find somewhere.”  
  
It took her less than half a block to make up her mind. She wasn’t going to tell Natasha or Steve about this. Vision was going to be her little secret. She didn’t want her team, or anything else, complicating things between them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fun fact. I will be posting something every day between now and the 26th. Not all Domesticated Foxes, but something. All leading up to a Christmas special on the 25th and 26th. It was supposed to be a full12 days of Christmas, but a couple of project stalled so... 9... 
> 
> Enjoy.


	66. Lessons in Conflict Resolution

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am going to content warning this and the next chapter for abuse. While in the fictional setting it has an explanation, I still worry it will be hard for people who have that particular pain point. 
> 
> Also PSA. No one in your life was brain washed by Hydra. It isn't okay. There are people who care and want to help.

Steve pushed his chair back from the desk. Nothing was quite as depressing as human trafficking. No, that wasn’t true. Nothing was more depressing than taking out one human trafficking ring only for another to pop back up in essentially the same place a month later. He’d been working on this file since he got back from his run this morning at it was starting to crush his soul. He needed a break. A break, and someone to lift his spirits. Bucky was down at the farm, and probably would be all afternoon, but it wasn’t like Steve was completely alone. He looked out the window at the early afternoon sun. His girl should just be finishing up her workout. Unless he was completely wrong about when she had kissed his neck and told him not to work too hard.  
  
His time keeping hadn’t been off. Amy was in the dojo, weapons packed away, working through the extended cool down he had insisted she add to her routine as her pregnancy progressed. Steve leaned against the door frame to take her in. Tension draining out of him already. Why had he skipped working out with Amy? She’d invited him. He’d insisted he needed to work. Their sporadic naginata training was always a delight. Especially now that they were back in a place where sparing ended with her throwing herself into his arms. Not that watching her cool down wasn’t enjoyable all on its own. Long slow stretches, that emphasised the length and shape of her perfect limbs. She turned her head towards him as she shifted from one pose to another, bending in half and pressing herself as close to her legs as she could manage these days. He blew her a kiss and slipped in to sit on the bench.  
  
Amy smiled back and rocked forward into an upside-down V. It was good to see him get away from his work. He’d been pushing himself to hard lately. He couldn’t change the world in the next four months and burning himself out wouldn’t help anyone. Maybe she could coax him into cooking a proper lunch. She could sit on the counter, they could talk about something meaningless, she would even let him baby her with vitals checks if it would relax him.  
  
Steve watched her float through a few more forms without saying anything, chest filling with love. There was a certain something extra about her the last few months. A glow. He’d seen it as early as her birthday party. Now that he knew what it was, he felt like an idiot for not recognizing it then. You’d have to be blind to miss her radiant aura now. She was going to be the most enticing creature at the Met Gala. He almost wished he was going with her. As it was, he’d have to trust her and Dai to beat off the hordes of men, married and single, that would fawn over her.  
  
“I never asked.” Steve leaned forward on his elbows, watching her elegant limbs stretch and curve. No, it wasn't an 'almost'. He wished he could go with her. He had a burning primordial desire to take credit for her condition. He wanted the world to know that she loved _him_ and was having _his_ baby. “What are you going to tell everyone? About the pregnancy I mean.”  
  
“I’m not going to tell them anything.” Amy shifted her weight, so it was centred over one foot and eased into a lunge, arms out, palms up, a deep warrior pose. “I’m going to take Brian as my date and let them infer.”  
  
Steve almost fell off the bench. Visions of a handsome man sliding his hand down Amy’s back. Of her meeting a knowing smirk with teasing eyes. He struggled to unclench his jaw so he could talk. “You’re going to _what?_ ”  
  
“I know. It complicates Sam’s cover a little, but we figured since there was no way Sam would ever be okay with sharing Bri, the fact that _Henry_ is totally fine with it only reinforces that they are different people.” Amy pushed up into tree pose, her shoulders creaking. Her body felt so heavy these days, her centre of gravity was completely off. “It took Brian a little convincing, but Sam is on board.”  
  
“Well, as long as _Sam_ is on board.” Steve grumbled, flexing one hand. What if he wasn’t on board? Amy and Brian had a history, and her hormones were all over the place right now. What was Bucky going to think of all this? He wouldn’t be okay with Amy and their daughter belonging to someone else.  
  
Amy straightened and slowly turned to face him. His tone left a lot to be desired. “Sorry, do you have a problem with my plan?”  
  
Steve crossed his arms over his chest. “Which part do you want to talk about first? The part where Brian ‘cheated’ on my best friend? Or where everyone is going to assume my daughter’s father is someone else for the rest of her life?”  
  
*****  
  
The sound of yelling made Bucky question his decision to skip his nap at the farm and come home. He’d thought he might walk in on Steve and Amy doing something, but he had hoped it would be something fun. Not tearing each other’s throats out. He sighed and reached for the door handle. Someone needed to stop them, and it wasn’t like anyone else could. “Honeys, I’m home.”  
  
Steve peeled his fingers off the chair he had been clutching. He didn’t know why he felt like he’d been caught with his hand in the cookie jar. He hadn’t done anything wrong. He wasn’t even the one being unreasonable here.  
  
Amy looked down at the sink full of broken dishes in front of her. Bucky didn’t need to see this. They shouldn’t be doing this at all. They wouldn’t have to if Steve would just see sense.  
  
Bucky looked around the room. It had been a long time since he had come home to them fighting like this. From the atmosphere in the room they had been going at it for at least an hour. Maybe he shouldn’t have had lunch down at the farm today. If he’d been here, he might have been able to cut them off before they got rolling. “Want to tell me what’s going on?”  
  
“Just Ayame deciding she knows better than us and she doesn’t need to discuss things.” Steve grumbled.  
  
“Oh yeah?” Bucky took a few more steps into the room. They hadn’t had a fight this bad since they all admitted to being in love with each other. He knew that wasn’t all that long ago in the grand scheme of things, but he had hoped that with everything that had happened since, they had put this sort of thing behind them. “What sort of things?”  
  
Amy dropped the last plate into the sink with a crash. “Independent mission specs. Gossip regarding me and my personal life. Appropriate long-term cover for me and my child.”  
  
Bucky did _not_ like that answer. At least not the way Amy worded it. She was pulling away. Steve was pushing her. “Why don’t we sit down, and you can catch me up.”  
  
Getting caught up didn’t make Bucky feel any better. Two strong opinionated people who were diametrically opposed were what had gotten them into this mess in the first place. The fact the opposed people were now his people, was in no way comforting. Steve was right. It was a dangerous decision. She shouldn’t have made it alone. Amy was right. She knew what they needed from a cover and Steve was under a lot of pressure. Both being right didn’t make either of them less defensive. Bucky tried to make them see reason, but it was hard to stop either of them once they were on a roll.  
  
He had managed to get them both sitting at least. Even if Steve’s knee kept bouncing, and Amy had gone unnervingly still. Any other time Bucky would be amused by how they handled stress. Today, all their dishes were broken and there were dents shaped like Steve’s fingers in the back of a dinning chair. Sitting was better than yelling at each other across the room, but he still wouldn’t call what they were doing communicating.  
  
“I’m not the one being stubborn here.” Steve hissed tapping a clenched fist against his knee.  
  
Bucky winced and rubbed his temples. Little shocks of what felt like electricity were bouncing off the back of his eyes. He knew that feeling, and he couldn’t let it get any worse. Not now. He was in the middle of something. Amy and Steve needed him.  
  
“What exactly is the difference between stubborn and obdurate? I always forget.” Amy snapped back. It was her mission and her cover. He had been fine with her making all the arrangements before he had figured out that there was another man involved. Her safety and the safety of her child, _their child_ , were more important that his fragile masculinity.  
  
Bucky closed his eyes. All he had to do was stay focused. He couldn’t lose himself right now. He couldn’t. If he could just shut out all the distractions…  
  
Steve gave up on sitting, shoving his chair away and pacing the length of the room. She wasn’t listening. Lies piled on top of lies. She had put them all at risk, him, Bucky, their child, even Sam. All because she was too stubborn to let him help, to even consider other options. There _were_ other options. Just because he couldn’t think of them off the top of his head didn’t mean there weren’t.  
  
The Soldier opened his eyes. His heart was racing. Something had set off the other one’s fight or flight reflex. He didn’t see any immediate threats. The Soldier tensed. Non-obvious threats were more dangerous.  
  
Amy followed Steve’s restless movements with her eyes, no other part of her moving. It was like he didn’t trust her. She wasn’t about to forget who she was with just because she attended one or two events with someone else. They were building a life together. A strange, chaotic, mess of a life, but a life. She loved them. She was making sacrifices for them. _This_ was a sacrifice she was making for them. She hated having to explain herself, especially when she was right. To the world, and more pressingly in this moment, to Steve.  
  
Steve struggled to get his breathing under control. So, what if he was jealous? The princess and her duke. The fairy tale couple. It was enough to drive anyone crazy. He didn’t want to spend the foreseeable future watching the tabloids gush about how cute they were together and how much his daughter looked like another man. Was that so wrong?  
  
“ _V ozhidanii zakazov._ *” The Soldier wasn’t used to not knowing what to do. Normally there was someone to tell him what was needed, or a threat waiting for him to eliminate. The frisson of tension filling the room was strange. He had never encountered something like it before. The Soldier didn’t like things he hadn’t encountered before. New things were dangerous.  
  
“You alright, Buck?” Steve asked touching his knee softly. It was a stupid question. The answer was obvious. Bucky’s eyes had gone blank, his posture was ridged, he wasn’t Bucky anymore. Not really.  
  
The Soldier pulled away from the man. He sounded like Steve. He also looked like the man he had fought on the bridge. The Soldier questioned his earlier threat assessment. He had been working off the other one’s feelings. The other one had been wrong before.  
  
Amy’s head snapped around. Bucky never spoke Russian. English to pretty much everyone, a little French with Steve, Spanish to Shuri, who was learning, occasionally Japanese to her, never Russian, not to anyone but Nat. Not unless he wasn’t entirely in control. “Bucky baby. Look at me.”  
  
The Soldier turned his head slowly towards the voice. The voice had made him go away in the past, turned the body back over to the other one. He didn’t know if that was a good idea this time. The other one was nearly as stressed as when they had woken up without the handlers.  
  
*****  
  
The bedroom was dark, the curtains drawn tight against the morning light. The sound of Bucky’s breathing was the only sound that broke the stillness, his chest rising and falling slowly. He was tucked into Steve’s side of the bed. Laying with his legs together and arm at his side in an uncannily corpse like repose instead of his normal loose-limbed sprawl.  
  
Amy knelt by the side of the bed, pressing her forehead into the mattress. She was sore from maintaining the position all night. The sheets had left lines on her face and her calves were both tightly cramped. It was the only position her stomach had been even remotely okay with. Sitting, or worse laying down, had left her gagging, and coughing up bile. Kneeling at least let her stay in the bedroom, and the idea of leaving the bedroom right now made her even more nauseous. This was her fault. Bucky reacted badly to stress. She knew that, still she had let Steve rile her up. She could have stayed calm and defended her position rationally. She hadn’t.  
  
It wasn’t just penance that had kept her on her knees at his bedside all night. There had been practical considerations too. She had put an end to at least three nightmares that tried to disturb her beautiful boy.  
  
“How is he?” Steve asked softly as he slipped back into the room. He had spent the night sitting on the edge of the bed holding Bucky’s hand. He wouldn’t have left at all if Bucky’s animals hadn’t needed feeding. He knew he could have asked the kids to, but he wanted them to take care of them himself. They were Bucky’s pride and joy. Steve couldn’t do anything to help Bucky, but he could look after the creatures Bucky cared about.  
  
Amy rocked back on her heels. Her eyes felt hot and gritty. She hoped Steve wouldn’t know she had been crying. She’d held it together all night while he’d been watching, wanting to be strong for him. As soon as she had been ‘alone’ the tears had started. She would blame hormones, but there had also been flashbacks to the worst time in her life. It wasn’t the same thing. Intellectually she knew that, but it had still been hard to clamp down on her panic. “Still asleep.”  
  
Steve traced his fingers along the bruise blooming across her jaw. It looked worse in the morning light. She had promised it was just a glancing blow and he didn’t need to worry about it. He should have known she was minimising. He sighed and eased himself onto the floor next to her. Amy was what she was, and it was why he loved her. They shouldn’t have fought. They should have made up at some point during the night instead of sitting silently refusing to look at each other. “I’m sorry. You were right. Brian is a great choice. He’ll watch your back, and the fewer people in on the secret the safer it is. Plus, if we do need to keep up the cover long term, he looks enough like me that no one will question the story. You know what you’re doing. I trust you.”  
  
“No. You were right.” Amy shifted closer to his side. Tucking her head against his chest so she could hear his steady heartbeat. It was reassuringly strong and steady. “Springing it on you was wrong. I should have talked to you. To both of you. I’m used to making decisions on my own and scared of people making them for me. I’m going to have to get used to sharing responsibility at least a little. It isn’t just my life anymore.”  
  
“Was that so hard?” Bucky croaked. His eyes were heavy, but he was glad he had woken up in time to hear them work everything out.  
  
“Buck!” Steve lunged to his knees. He was awake. Bucky was awake and he sounded like himself.  
  
“How long was I out?” Bucky ran his hand over Steve’s cheek. He looked fine. No black eyes, no bruising around his throat, he wasn’t favouring an arm, or acting like his ribs were tender. It didn’t look like Bucky had hurt him at all.  
  
Steve ran his fingers through Bucky’s hair. He’d been so scared. It wasn’t fair for things to go wrong now. Not when they had so much to live for. The baby, the surgery, their future together. It would have been even worse if they had gone wrong because of something he and Amy had done. Something he had done. “About fifteen hours.”  
  
“What did I—” Bucky cut himself off. Amy had settled on the bed next to Steve, moving her face out of shadow and into light. He cupped her chin and tipped her face, the dark splotch defacing her perfect complexion was the exact size and shape of his elbow. Steve was fine, Amy was not.  
  
“My centre of gravity is off.” Amy whispered, covering his hand with hers, to hide the mark. He couldn’t blame himself. It hadn’t been Bucky. He would never hurt her. There just happened to be someone else trapped in his head along with the man she loved. They had a plan for how to solve that problem. “It was one elbow, baby.”  
  
“Yeah, but it was one elbow that I threw.” Bucky pulled his hand away, shrinking in on himself. It was one elbow this time, but what about next time?  
  
“Hey,” Steve pressed his hand to Bucky’s cheek. Bucky couldn’t hide himself away from them now. In just a few months all of this would be over. Besides, Amy had disarmed Bucky and was halfway through sweeping his feet out from under him when he had hit her. The only reason he had made contact at all was her compensating for her belly. Two seconds after the hit, she’d had him on the floor pouring enough pour into him to render him catatonic. There was no doubt in Steve’s mind that she was in control the entire time. “You think I’d let her stay if I thought you were a real threat to her?”  
  
“No,” Bucky deflated, melting into Steve’s side and tangling his fingers with Amy’s. “You wouldn’t let anything endanger our girl. Not even me.”  
  
Steve wrapped his arms around Bucky and pulled Amy properly into their laps. They would get through this. They would talk and listen to each other, and they would get through this. Amy would have the baby. Bucky would have his surgery. They could make it through anything, together.  
  
*****  
  
A long shower and a clean silk tunic shirt had left Amy feeling worlds better. Her eyes didn’t feel dry and gritty. The knot in her chest had loosened, even if it hadn’t completely untied. She secured a messy bun with one more bobby pin as she wandered down the hall from the bathroom.  
  
The same couldn’t be said of Steve. He’d meant to clean up the kitchen. Clear away all the broken dishes and make the space liveable again. Instead, he had been standing in front of the sink for nearly twenty minutes. Turning a shard of plate the size of his palm over between his fingers. The distant sound of Amy getting ready for the day should have been reassuring. It hardly penetrated Steve’s mind, blocked out by the memory of yesterday. What had happened, and what had almost happened.  
  
A new bubble of worry bloomed in Amy’s gut. Her boy did not look okay. “Steve?”  
  
“I’m going to ask you a question, and I need you to answer it honestly.” Steve turned around to face her, leaning heavily on the edge of the counter. The serine aura of calm she projected was back. The dark blemish on her jaw invisible under a layer of makeup. Steve hated to think about why she was so good at erasing signs of violence. She deserved a more peaceful life than the one the universe had given her. Here of all places, she should be protected from that. “Did I lie to Bucky this morning? Are you safe here? Should Bucky stay down at the farm while you’re pregnant? Or should we find you somewhere else to stay?”  
  
Amy drifted into the kitchen. Definitely not okay. “That’s more than one question.”  
  
Steve ran his fingers down the inside of Amy’s arm, gently curling his hand around her wrist. “Amy…”  
  
Amy bit her lip. None of them were easy questions. He had a right to ask. Hard as they were, the answers were essential to their future. “I’m as safe here as anywhere. This is Bucky’s home. I’m not going to make him leave because of something that wasn’t his fault.”  
  
“No,” Steve dropped the chunk of ceramic in the trashcan waiting at his side. “It was my fault.”  
  
Amy squeezed his fingers. They were in this together. He didn’t have to take the weight of everything on his shoulders. “You weren’t the only one who made mistakes.”  
  
Steve stroked his thumb over the back of her hand. “You didn’t do anything wrong either, Aims. You were trying to keep us safe and save me from worrying. I’m the neanderthal who didn’t trust you.”  
  
“Steve.” Amy whispered the name, stepping closer as she did. They had fought because they had done a terrible job of communicating with each other. It was a fixable problem. "We're going to be okay. We have each other, and we will be okay."  
  
“There was one more question that you didn’t answer.” Steve looked down at their hands. Amy’s was so delicate in his. She was strong, but not unbreakable. “Should you stay?”  
  
Amy’s grip tightened. She had promised herself that if he asked her to leave, she would. But that had been before everything had changed. Before their love had clicked into place. Then the idea had broken her heart. Now… she didn’t know what it would do now… “I don’t want to leave you.”  
  
“You won’t be alone.” Steve lifted their linked hands, kissing her palm softly. He’d promised she wouldn’t have to do this alone, and she wouldn’t. Even if it wasn’t safe for her to be around Bucky right now. He would look after her. “I’ll split my time. Don't worry about Bucky. He'll be alright without us for a while.”  
  
“Steve, I’m pregnant and mildly famous, you’re wanted and recognisable everywhere. There’s no where we can go that we won’t stand out.” Amy smoothed a hand over her belly. “At least nowhere I would want for her.”  
  
“We’ll find somewhere.” Steve assured her, cupping her face. He wouldn’t lose her. As much as it would hurt for the three of them to not be together-- at least until after Bucky’s surgery, they still had that light at the end of the tunnel—It was more important that she was safe. And he would do anything to keep her safe and not lose her.  
  
Amy dropped her eyes. The fact there was nowhere else wasn’t the only thing she didn’t like about his plan. She knew it was reckless. She had always been reckless where her boys were concerned. “I don’t want to leave Bucky either.”  
  
Steve pressed his palm to the swell, feeling the soft kick of his child, so strong and alive. “Anything like this happens again and we’re taking you home to Japan. I don’t care about my risk. As long as you’re safe.”  
  
“It won’t happen again.” Amy said determinedly. Maybe if she said it enough, she would believe it. It was probably true. They knew what had caused the break. All she and Steve had to do was control themselves and it would be fine. A few more months and there wouldn’t be a risk at all.  
  
Steve wrapped his arms around her. Tucking her protectively against his chest, one hand on the back of her neck, the other spread over the small of her back. “I worry about you.”  
  
“I know.” Amy smiled against his chest. They would be alright. When he held her like this, she was sure of it.  
  
*****  
  
They spent the evening reading. Just the three of them curled up in bed. Steve and Amy took turns reading aloud. It was good, comfortable. Steve couldn’t deny when things were good between them, things were very good. They just had to figure out a better system for when things were less good.  
  
The darkness that filled the bedroom tonight had a different quality to it, warm instead of chilled by fear. Bucky had drifted off shortly after nine, Amy held against his chest as his little spoon. Steve was having less luck falling asleep. He’d spent the last three hours staring at the ceiling, completely unable to shake an uneasy feeling. The insomnia could be attributed to his inactivity all day. With his metabolism, a quick jog down to the farm to feed and water the animals just wasn’t enough to wear him out.  
  
Steve rolled onto his side to watch the people he loved sleep. He knew that wasn’t the whole truth. He still couldn’t shake the idea of someone else looking after Amy and their baby. Amy was stubborn, wilful, too clever for her own good. She could get herself into all sorts of trouble on her own in New York. It wasn’t a responsibility he wanted to give up.  
  
He had failed to protect her yesterday. Steve swung is legs out of bed. He would never forgive himself if something happened while she was away.  
  
Amy sat up as the mattress shifted. Steve hadn’t really slept all night, not that she was doing much better, but getting out of bed entirely was a surprise. He liked to stay close after Bucky had a rough day. He wasn’t just getting out of bed either. It looked like he was getting dressed to go out. “Steve?”  
  
“I’ve got to go away for a while. One day, maybe two.” Steve leaned over and tucked Amy’s hair behind her ear. He was pretty sure she was more shaken than she was letting on, if she needed him he’d figure something out. “You’ll be alright? Should you come with me?”  
  
Amy caught his hand as he pulled it back. She understood why he felt the need to ask, but she didn’t see them having a repeat of Bucky’s incident. The fight between her and Steve had been a clear trigger, and no one else could make Amy lose her cool the way Steve did. As long as he was himself, Bucky would never hurt her. She pressed his hand to her lips. “We’ll be just fine.”  
  
Bucky rolled onto his back, still half asleep. He hadn’t heard Steve’s phone go off with an emergency call, but he had been known to miss things when he was sleeping safely. “Work?”  
  
Steve kissed Bucky’s forehead. “Nothing like that. Just something I’ve got to take care of before I can sleep happy.”  
  
Amy bit her lip, guessing at exactly what he thought he had to take care of from the way he was holding his shoulders. Determined, protective, still a little jealous. He wanted to mark his territory and make sure his family was protected. She wouldn’t stop him. Not if it was something he needed to do. “Don’t be too hard on him.”  
  
He kissed her softly again. He needed to be sure that someone would look after her. And not just Dai. “Back as soon as I can. Stay safe.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *awaiting orders


	67. Filling People In

The breakfast nook was one of the cosiest spaces in the Braddock townhouse. Morning light bathed the small table in a warm glow. A carafe of coffee, a small jug of cream, and a bowl of sugar filled the space between two full English breakfasts. Munching on a slice of toast, Brian leaned back in his chair, appreciating the sight of Sam sipping his coffee and reading the paper. It was pure domestic bliss. The kind he had always hoped he would find. “We should do brunch next weekend. Unless you have to work?”  
  
Sam’s mouth twitched in a wry smile. “Brunch?”  
  
Brian leaned forward on his elbows. How could anyone resist that smile? “Falsa was telling me about this place over by Camden Market. Apparently, they do great popovers.”  
  
“Popovers?” Sam raised an eyebrow and stole a bite of mushroom of Brian’s plate. “Isn’t that a little gay?”  
  
“Wouldn’t be the gayest thing we did this week.” Brian smirked and licked his lip, wicked thoughts of all the things they had done the night before and all the things they were going to do again tonight running through his mind. More than six months living together, and the spark was still very much alive.  
  
Sam rolled his eyes. He knew that look. His guy was plotting how to jump his bones as soon as he got the chance. “I hate popovers.”  
  
Brian grinned. If that was Sam’s only objection, they were going to brunch. “They serve them with steak. I thought it would be a nice way to fuel up before heading to track day.”  
  
Sam laughed out loud and reached across the table for Brian’s hand. Track day might be Sam's favorite part of dating a rich boy. Other than the rich boy himself, if course. A whole day hanging out at the race track driving as fast as he could, and try to beat Brian's time around the time. If he was suggesting a track day, Brian had probably managed to get his hands on a fun and exciting car. Maybe even Ayame’s McLaren. “You win this round, Braddock.”  
  
Brian kissed Sam’s knuckles. It wasn’t just the naughty things. It was the little domestic things. Morning coffee like this, doing the grocery shopping, Thursday evening house cleaning, arguing about football, the way Sam nuzzled into him when he tumbled into bed in the middle of the night, waking him up with their heads on the same pillow.  
  
The sound of the doorbell made Brian frown. They weren’t expecting anyone. Sunday was the one day of the week they both reliably had off work, and they deliberately tried to avoid scheduling things that would interrupt their time together.  
  
“I’ll get it.” Sam squeezed Brian’s hand reassuringly, it was probably just someone with the wrong address, some quick directions and they could get back to deciding what they were going to do with their day. Sam was voting for an afternoon run down the Thames and takeaway curry for dinner.  
  
Brian’s eyebrows shot upward as Sam re-entered the kitchen, trailing a slightly sheepish Captain America in his wake. “To what do we owe the pleasure?”  
  
Steve pulled off his baseball cap, jaw set seriously. “We need to talk.”  
  
*****  
  
Steve cradled his mug off coffee carefully between his hands. Some of his anxieties had left him now that he was here. Brian’s home was lovely, a mix of antique and new furniture, the chair Steve was sitting on was new, but the coffee table was distinctly old, from the turn of the century at a guess. There were hints of Sam in the room too, a pair of running shoes by the garden door, two half empty glasses of water sitting on a magazine, Sam always forgot he had a drink.  
  
On the couch across form Steve, Sam sat sipping his own coffee, his arm draped along the back of the couch behind Brian. Brian had his head down reading the briefing document Steve had written up on his way here, autopilot could be such a blessing.  
  
Steve tried not to fidget. Now that he was here, this trip was starting to feel ridiculous. He should be home with Bucky and Amy. He could have written the briefing and emailed it. It was good to see Sam at least. Sam was always the level-headed one. He would tell Steve if he was being irrational. Steve missed having Sam around to bounce ideas off. If he told him, Sam would snort and say something about support systems.  
  
Brain looked up, incredulous. “You can’t seriously expect me to keep her away from tuna and other large game fish. She’s been in a land locked country for months. I don’t feel like losing a limb.”  
  
Steve took a long drink of cooling coffee. Why didn’t that feel like an over statement. His girl was so fierce, especially about little things. “If you’re is going to be her baby daddy, I need to know you’ll look after her the way I would.”  
  
“Actually, we’re going with accidental sperm donor. Not baby daddy.” Brian said absently as he looked over the second half of Rogers’ instructions. He understood the urge to include a section titled _Bar Fights_ , but if the goddess decided she wanted to brawl, pregnant or no, Brian was going to get out of the way. He had played that game one too many times.  
  
Steve blinked. He hadn’t thought to ask. They weren’t claiming to be in a relationship, just that they had slept together and had an accident. “You know what, that helps.”  
  
Sam rolled his eyes and poured Steve another cup of coffee. “Why are you here, Rogers?”  
  
The warmth of the mug sunk into Steve’s hands. He didn’t know why Sam was asking, he had a five-page document laying out why he was here. “I want to make sure that someone takes care of Amy while she’s away.”  
  
“Bullshit.” Sam crossed his arms over his chest. Steve wasn’t going to get out of having a hard conversation just because he had an easy answer. It was time to examine the causes of some reactions. “Aims needs looking after like a fish needs a bicycle. Why are you here?”  
  
“Bucky had another slip, it was bad.” Steve leaned his elbows on his knees, rubbing the back of his neck. “Amy got hurt.”  
  
Brian’s head snapped up and Steve waved him back down. “Not badly hurt. But hurt. Aims and I were fighting at the time, that’s what triggered him. Which means that it was my fault. The slip, Amy getting hurt, all of it. I love them, and I couldn’t keep them safe even in our home.”  
  
Sam leaned back in his chair, crossing his legs. There it was. Steve’s greatest strengths were also his biggest weaknesses. “Unpack that for me.”  
  
*****  
  
“-Isn’t the same situation, but it still felt like I was making excuses again.”  
  
Bucky hesitated outside the door to the armoury. He had thought he and Amy were alone, but she was talking to someone. Not just talking to someone, baring her heart to someone.  
  
He peeked in. Amy was kneeling at her low worktable, elbows digging into the wood, head hanging, phone clasped against her ear. A knife rolling around the fingers of her free hand.  
  
“No, it doesn’t feel the same.” Amy sighed, spinning the dagger on its point. “They never berate or belittle me. They are both unfailingly supportive.” The memory of her fight with Steve sat heavily in the pit of her stomach. No lying to her therapist, that was rule one, it was the only way he could help her. “We have occasional disagreements about some of my methods.”  
  
Bucky’s eyes fixed on the knife she was toying with. A narrow mat black dagger. _His_ dagger. The Fairbairn-Skyes that he’d fallen on love with the moment he found it in the gear he had been given. He hadn’t seen it in days, not since... Had he drawn it on her? Had she taken it off him?  
  
“Contrition after the fact isn’t a reason to forgive someone.” Amy’s hand tightened on the knife, stilling it, and driving the point into the surface of the wood. How many times had Jun’ichi apologised for what he had done? How many times had he promised her it wouldn’t happen again? How often had she forgiven him and promised she wouldn’t do whatever it was that had aggravated him? How long had it taken her to start believing it wasn’t anything she had done? “You spent months trying to drill that lesson into my stubborn head.”  
  
Bucky took a half step into the room. She looked so lost and scared. Like she was clinging to what little composure she had left. He needed to… do something… the dark shadow on her jaw was a stark reminder that she should be. That she was right to be scared of him.  
  
“Hang on.” Amy dropped her phone to her chest and looked up at him. “Did you need something, _Mon Loup?_ ”  
  
“No, just...” Bucky hadn’t been sure what he wanted to say before, and he had even less of an idea now. That look had vanished, replaced by worry about him. He didn’t deserve that concern. She was the one people should be worrying about. “Who are you talking to?”  
  
“My therapist.” Amy studied his expression thoughtfully. She had expected today to be another rough one, but it might be worse than she had thought. She might have to lend him a little bit of soothing power again this evening if he was going to get any sleep. She might even have to cut her call short and look after him now, which would be inconvenient. She really needed to take better care of her own mental health.  
  
“Oh... He... He knows about us?” Bucky had assumed it was Dai or even Steve. Steve had mentioned that she had therapist and Bucky had known intellectually that she talked to him about her life. He just hadn’t considered how much of her life consisted of him and Steve.  
  
“Yes.” Amy answered simply. He was her therapist.  
  
Bucky knelt next to her, careful not to touch her for the first time in a long time. He touched the hilt of the dagger she was holding. Mat black and vicious, it was definitely his dagger. “People don’t disarm me.”  
  
Amy rolled her eyes. People didn’t disarm him, and they didn’t land hits on her. “I’m not people, and you only have one arm.”  
  
Bucky looked at her, not at her face, he still didn’t deserve that, but at the phone she was still clutching to her chest. Her therapist knew everything. If he was any good, and Bucky assumed he was, he would tell her to get herself out of a dangerous situation. And she should, she should be somewhere safe. Little Fox should always be safe. “If... If he thinks you should leave, you should... I... I’ll explain it to Steve. You need to be safe, baby girl. Before anything else, you need to be safe.”  
  
Amy regarded him calmly. This latest incident had shaken them all, but it made sense that Bucky would be completely off kilter. “Do you want me to leave?”  
  
Bucky’s heart thudded with terror at the idea she could think that, even for a second. He gave up on not touching her, pressing his face into the back of her head. Her hair enveloped him. The silky perfumed waterfall had been his safe place almost since they had started living together. He hated the idea of her going anywhere, wanted to keep her close to him and Steve for the rest of their lives. “No. Never.”  
  
“I’m not going anywhere.” Amy said reassuringly. He would be fine, as soon as she was done here, she would give him all the comfort he could possibly need. “I am going to finish my call, because I am sure I’m being billed an exorbitant amount for the good doctor to browse Instagram while you and I chat.”  
  
Bucky sat back, nodding. He had interrupted. It was important that she be allowed to work through what had happened without pressure from him, even perceived pressure. She needed to do what was best for her and the baby. No matter what that was.  
  
She kissed his cheek. She loved him, but she needed to do this, and she needed to do it alone. “I’ll be out in a little bit.”  
  
“Love you.” Bucky whispered, rubbing his cheek against her silvery hair one last time before he left. She said she wasn’t leaving, but maybe she should. She had the baby to think about. If her therapist was any good, he would talk her around.  
  
*****  
  
Anxiety made Amy’s hand tremble as she went in search of Bucky. Her therapist thought she needed to share more of her past with her boys, level the playing field and redress the balance of power. He had a point, she knew everything that had happened to them, they knew almost nothing about her trauma. The only problem was, she didn’t talk about her weaknesses.  
  
She stopped just inside living room. Her boy was sitting on the couch, obviously trying to get into the novel he had started on Wednesday. Bucky looked like he was finally regaining some piece of mind. It would be cruel of her to ruin that.  
  
Amy chided herself. She was just making excuses to avoid something she didn’t want to do. “Can we talk?”  
  
This was it. Her therapist was sure to have made her see sense. Bucky braced himself for the hard new that she was leaving. “Always, baby girl. I’m so sorry. I can’t—"  
  
“I want to tell you a story.” Amy cut him off, perching herself carefully on the arm of the couch next to him. If she got distracted, she would chicken out. She considered her next words. Turning everything into a fiction might be cheating, but she wasn’t sure she could make it through without some emotional distance. “—a sort of fairy tale.”  
  
Bucky looked up at her confused. A fairy tale was a strange framing device for softening the blow. His little Fox usually went more for the rip the band aid off school of breaking bad news.  
  
Amy took his hand and spread it in her lap, palm up. She traced his fingers thoughtfully as she tried to put her thoughts into some semblance of order. The background was easy enough. Really the only question was where to start the main narrative. And even there, telling the story to Bucky, there was really only one place to start. “Once upon a time, not as long ago you might think, there was a little girl. In many ways, she was a normal little girl, she liked pretty clothes and playing with her friends. In other ways, she was very different. Her family had raised her to hunt the monsters in the world. One day, when she was almost grown, she went out to kill a very scary monster. Many men had hunted the monster in the past, he had killed them all.”  
  
Bucky started. His hand closed convulsively around her fingers. It had to be him. He was the monster she was sent to kill.  
  
Amy kissed his knuckles. Perhaps that hadn’t been the best wording. She wasn’t sure how else to set up the parallel she wanted to draw though. “The little girl fared little better than past adventures had. She managed to wound the monster, but he had injured her more than anyone ever had before. At the last moment she realised that he wasn’t a monster, he was a handsome knight under a terrible curse.”  
  
She made him sound so tragically romantic. “Amy…”  
  
“Shhh, story’s not over.” Amy whispered. She hadn’t even reached the hard part. “She fled from the knight, but from that day forth she pledged to discover how he had been cursed.”  
  
Bucky felt his stomach flip. All her academic work. The hours she still spent reading and reviewing articles. It was all because of him? Because of that one day in Prague?  
  
“To that end she went to study with the smartest wizards she could find. They all told her that the monster wasn’t real, but she knew he was. They asked why she was interested in the knight and not his king who had gone missing at the same time. They all thought the king was more interesting, but the little girl though he was a little pretentious. There wasn’t much information on the knight though, so she studied the king hoping to find insight that way.” A constricting band of panic tried to tighten around Amy’s ribs, she pushed the feeling away. She had come this far. She could finish. “One day when she was studying, she met a handsome prince.”  
  
“Tall, blonde, handsome beyond all reason? Did he fall madly in love with her?” Bucky smiled. It had to be Steve. Although it was strange that she had said prince when she had called him a king earlier on.  
  
“No.” Amy shook her head regretfully. How different would her life have been if she had met Steve back then? The baby shifted inside her before she could get to melancholic at the idea. Different wasn’t necessarily better. Steve might have saved her from some of the greatest pain in her life, but she also would have missed out on some of the greatest joys. Steve was far too noble to start a relationship with a teenager. She would have lost him and Bucky. Painful as the experiences had been, they had made her who she was and brought her to where she was now. It wouldn’t do to dwell on changing the past. Not when she had a bright, beautiful future with her boys and their child to look forward too.  
  
She took a deep breath and continued her story. That future would go smoother if her boys knew at least some of what they had gotten themselves into. “He was a prince from her homeland. Very handsome, and her family all approved. She fell madly in love with him, and she thought he felt the same. Before long she moved into his castle, that’s when she discovered that he wasn’t always the kind prince she had thought he was. When they were alone, he turned into a vicious monster. He… he hurt her. Worse than any of the monsters she had hunted ever had. Worse even than the knight.”  
  
“The little girl… she thought it was her fault. That if she just loved him _better_ , he wouldn’t have to hurt her.” Amy squeezed her eyes closed, trying desperately to shut out the sight of twisted metal and blood. It didn’t help. The motorcycle crash had happened a long time ago, it was only in her head now.  
  
“It wasn’t, baby girl, it was never your fault.” Bucky closed his hand protectively around her leg. He had confirmed with Natasha that ‘the bastard’, as Nat called him, was dead. Otherwise he would be off of the couch and tracking the man down already. No one should break another person the way he had obviously tried to break Amy, but Bucky had a particularly violent protective streak when it came to the people he loved. It wouldn’t have been a bullet that found Jun’ichi if he had still been alive. It would have been a coldly furious Winter Soldier. He would have taken care of the problem up close and personal.  
  
Amy let out a shuddering breath. She was safe. She was sitting in her living room with a man she loved, who loved her, not bleeding out on the pavement. “Who said anything about me? Let me finish my story.”  
  
Bucky bit off a protest nodded for her to continue. He didn’t think she would be telling this ‘story’ if she didn’t feel like she had to.  
  
“He made her hunt for him, some monsters still, but others as well, and he… he punished her to make sure she obeyed him. Hit her, scared her, when that didn't work…” Screams, not her own this time, echoed in her mind. “He was quite creative really.”  
  
Rage sang through Bucky’s chest again. If there was a way to kill someone a second time, he would.  
  
“The prince let her keep studying. The more she found out about what had happened to the handsome knight, the more she wished she had known him. He had lived with monsters worse than hers, and he had never let them break him. She started turning to her studies more and more. Retreating into the stories of what she had started to think of as _her_ knight as a refuge from the things that were happening to her… and the things she was doing. He was so brave and cleaver. And…” Amy trailed off.  
  
“And?” Bucky whispered, reaching up to touch her face. The bruise was fading already, another couple of days and it would vanish entirely. How anyone could disfigure her sharp figures deliberately was beyond him.  
  
Amy covered his hand with her. “And she fell in love again.”  
  
Bucky pulled her hand down to his lips and kissed the centre of her palm. Love, that was better. His little Fox deserved so much love. “With the knight?”  
  
“With the knight.” Amy assured him. “Knowing everything he had survived, how much he had done to resist his captors, the small ways he had found to rebel, how could she not. Thinking of him, hunting the past for signs of him, it helped keep her soul alive through the worst her monster could throw at her.” Amy took another deep breath. Violent as it had been, the end of her relationship was almost the least painful part. “Then her monster asked her to do something she would never do, could never do, so she turned on him, and ran away to hide in an ivory tower.”  
  
Bucky stroked his thumb over the back of her hand. This story felt very different from the few times they had talked about Amy’s life before. Less factual, more emotional. “Did she like her ivory tower?”  
  
“She did.” A hint of a smile touched Amy’s lips. “She was lonely, she looked for another knight, but none of them were as interesting as _her_ knight. Eventually the missing king found her, and he taught her how to be happy again, even if she wasn’t very good at it. And well, you know the rest.”  
  
Bucky stared at their linked fingers again. “I’m not sure there is a difference between being a monster and being cursed. Not if the knight ended up hurting people like the princess.”  
  
“Context is important, _Mon Loup_.” Amy lifted his chin with her free hand, forcing him to look at her. She hadn’t shared the story so he would feel bad about himself. The opposite in fact. “The monster hurt people because he wanted power and control, the knight hurt people because he was scared, in pain, and couldn’t help himself. Intentions matter.”  
  
Bucky shook his head. Intentions mattered, but so did results. “I’m still so sorry, baby girl. I want to say it will never happen again...”  
  
“You were never my monster, Bucky baby.” Amy slid into his lap, cupping his face between her hands. “And the very fact you won’t promise it won’t happen again proves you never could be.”  
  
Bucky wrapped his hand around her hip. He hoped she was right. “I love you, little Fox.”  
  
“I love you, _Mon Loup_.” Amy rested her forehead against his. Her breathing slowed to match his carefully controlled breathing. A calm quiet settled over them. Amy wished they could just stay like this forever. Safe in each other’s arms. There was just one thing missing, and Amy was reasonably sure he would be home by tomorrow.


	68. Doing Alright

The next month was quiet. Steve and Amy started using their training together as time to talk, actually talk, about all the hard things they had avoided talking about before. Bucky sat in on a few of their sessions. He liked watching them. Even rounding out the way she was, Amy was graceful, and Steve moved like an avalanche. An avalanche that Amy was slowly starting to teach how to direct itself the way she did. Twice, Bucky joined in. Together he and Steve managed to beat her at her own game, driving her into a corner until Steve could level his staff at her throat. Losing didn’t put her off the way Bucky had assumed it would. As soon as they lowered their weapons, she threw herself into their arms and dragged them to the bedroom.  
  
There was another sate dinner with the clan chiefs. Steve discovered that he and M’Baku actually had a lot in common. The Jabari chief graciously accepted Amy’s deferring her visit to the mountains until after the birth of her child. He also gave Bucky advice on how to keep the aphids off his yams, and how to cook them as something other than stew. Talking about the farm made Bucky open up in a way nothing else did.  
  
Steve’s favourite parts were the long lazy evenings together. Bucky would read, Amy worked, and Steve alternated between the two past times. Steve remembered exactly how much he liked sitting with Amy’s legs in his lap, a situation made even more pleasant by Bucky burrowing in against his other side. Some nights he would make Amy set aside her laptop and watch a show with them. Half the time when she did, she would fall asleep and Steve would carry her to bed. Some nights he would carry her and Bucky.  
  
Steve finally got his picnic too. The three of them spent an afternoon sprawled on a blanket at the farm, not doing much of anything at all. Steve and Bucky teased Amy for her skittishness around the goats. Although Steve had to admit, the big billy did seem to have a problem with her. Amy cuddled against Steve’s side and glared back at the goat. Let the boy’s tease, she wasn’t about to let livestock get the better of her.  
  
It wasn’t all pastoral bliss and falling asleep to bake off. There were nights where one or more of them had a nightmare. Days where Bucky retreated into himself and wouldn’t talk. Steve and Amy still had disagreements that left them fuming, although they both endeavoured to listen and give each other space to cool down. Those things were small irritations in the grand scheme. None of them would describe their lives together as anything but happy and content.  
  
*****  
  
It wasn’t a sound that woke Steve. It almost never was when Amy was the one having trouble sleeping. Bucky screamed and thrashed. Steve knew he whimpered, at least before he screamed. But Amy… if Amy got to screaming, it was bad. Their girl went quiet when she was scared. Quiet and still. Still enough that she stopped breathing. Steve propped himself on one elbow to peak over Bucky’s snoring body. He was having a good night at least. Amy’s side of the bed was empty. There wasn’t even a dent in her pillow, although that didn’t mean much. Amy used Bucky instead of the pillow most nights. Her phone was on the bedside table, so she hadn’t gone far.  
  
Steve slipped out of bed, carefully tucking the blankets back around Bucky. If they hadn’t woken him up, he needed the rest.  
  
A soft night breeze ruffled Amy’s hair as she leaned on the balcony railing. Her hands were shaking. she curled them into fists, squeezing to still them. Her mind was racing, concocting all sorts of horrendous scenarios for her time away. She’d given up on sleep after her third time jerking awake. Steve and Bucky didn’t deserve to have their sleep disturbed just because she was anxious.  
  
Steve snagged a sweater off a chair in the living room and followed her outside. Nights here were warm, but not warm enough to go wandering around in one of Amy’s flimsy little night gowns, or the light cotton pyjama pants that were all he was wearing. They called him a mother hen because of how much he worried about them. He wasn’t about to stop any time soon. Especially not the night before one of them left. “I’m supposed to be the one lying awake.”  
  
Amy unclenched her left hand, displeased that the tremor was still there. Her self-control should be better than this. She blamed the pregnancy hormones. All of her feelings were a little more intense, just enough that she couldn’t control herself. It didn’t help that her boys were an endless source of anxiety. They were both magnets for trouble. Steve didn’t have an ounce of self-preservation in his body, and neither did Bucky if Steve was the one at risk. “You don’t have a monopoly on worrying.”  
  
He wrapped his arms around her from behind tucking her inside the sweater with him. He hated to see her anxious like this. They’d spent too much time arguing about all the little things that could go wrong for it to be one of those. It had to be something big. “My big one is you getting into trouble and me being too far away to help. What’s yours?”  
  
Amy wrapped her hand around his forearm. It was firm, the big muscle warm against her palm. Strong. He was strong, and competent, and hopelessly reckless. To say nothing of Bucky. Sweet, fragile, Bucky. “What if something happens while I’m away? What if you need me?”  
  
“I love it when we worry about the same thing.” Steve murmured, burring his face in her newly dyed hair. Black again. A normal hair colour so she didn’t attract too much attention. As if she could be anything other than the most stunning creature in the room. The most stunning creature that would be half a world away, right in the middle of the lion’s den.  
  
“I’m serious.” Amy turned around in his arms. She worried about them. About the things that could happen while she left them alone. What if Wakanda had another coup? What if Bucky had another attack? Not just the little slips he recovered from so quickly, a major attack. She couldn’t leave them. But if they wanted Bucky to get better, she needed to. No one else could do what she could. No one else had the connections she did. She could protect them, or she could save them. She had to go.  
  
“So am I.” Steve kissed the top of her head. She was worried about her leaving. He was worrying about her leaving. It was the same thing. “I like when we are on the same page.”  
  
Amy nuzzled deeper into his chest. She liked it too, it was worlds better than when they were fighting. Here, safe in his arms, a soft jungle scented breeze cooling her exposed legs, Bucky sleeping soundly down the hall, the world didn’t seem so terrible. “Is this anything like how you pictured our lives?”  
  
“Parts of it.” Steve tucked her hair behind her ear. He’d pictured being in love. He hadn’t pictured having to hide. “Some of the details…They came as a bit of a surprise.”  
  
“Like what?” She tipped her head into the touch. She loved the casually adoring way he touched her. The warmth in his eyes that was enough to melt her heart. She hoped he felt even half as loved when she looked at him.  
  
“Like—” Steve scooped her up and carried her to the armchair by the open door. He settled her carefully in his lap, one arm cradling her back, the other curled around her legs. “I never pictured central Africa.” He kissed her temple. “And I thought there would be more preparation before we started a family. We still don’t have a nursery, I know Sam said we can use his bedroom, but babies take supplies and we’ve got nothing.”  
  
“I’m picking stuff up while I’m away.” Amy smiled. She wasn’t even here yet and their baby girl already had him wrapped around her finger. Bucky too for that mater.  
  
“I know.” He’d taken most of last week to put together a shopping list for her. He was sure he was forgetting something. They’d figure that out. Amy was planning to go home for the birth. Dai would pick up anything they forgot and have it waiting for him. He kissed the side of her head again. “I might paint.”  
  
“You’re nesting, _Mon Ours_.” Amy teased combing her fingers through his hair. It was sweet.  
  
“I know.” Steve chuckled and bumped his nose against hers. It should be her hormones urging her to turn their little apartment into a home. He was the one who and been spending time trying to baby proof and researching all of the gear they would need. This was the most important mission of his life. He wasn’t about to go in under prepared.  
  
Amy tucked her head against his chest, she could hear his heartbeat. It was soothing. Maybe she should have stayed in bed. Nestled in between them. Woken Steve up to hold her like this instead of making him come find her.  
  
Steve ran his knuckles down her arm. He loved their life. Even if it wasn’t exactly what he had imagined. He wouldn’t ask. He and Bucky had agreed not to ask until things were more settled, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t talk about the fact he had been thinking about it. That he had wanted to, even before they’d found out she was pregnant. Hell, even before he’d knocked her up. Before she’d let them back in even that much. “I thought we’d be married. Before we had kids, I thought we’d make everything official.”  
  
Amy looked up at him. The _M_ word was taboo between the two of them. They hadn’t talked about that last night together, about what he had asked. They hadn’t even really talked about their future, not beyond the baby and Bucky’s surgery. They’d been too busy playing catch up with the present for it to matter, and if she was honest with herself, she was scared.  
  
Steve stroked her arm softly. If he’d done things properly the first time, maybe they would have been. “I thought we’d have time, that we could get Bucky’s brain straight, then the three of us could figure things out. Then maybe I could ask, and you would say yes.”  
  
Amy snorted and shook her head. Steve Rogers, eternal optimist. Their life together was impossible. She was living it, and she still didn’t believe it. “You thought it would be that easy? That the pieces would just fall into place?”  
  
“I’d hoped—” He kissed her temple again. “Almost from the time I figured out I was in love with Bucky—I hoped the two of you would love each other as much as I love you both. That we could figure out a future together, all of us. I had absolutely no idea how any of it would work, but god, I wanted it.”  
  
Amy stroked his chest. She had never even thought to want it. Steve and Bucky belonged together; she had been convinced that she didn’t. Recent events had made her question that. Recent events and a steady stream of affection from both men. “You wanted to have your cake and eat it too.”  
  
Steve smiled and ran his hand up her leg to the hem of her nightgown. It didn’t look like she was freaking out. She wasn’t pulling away. She wasn’t lecturing him about why their getting married was a bad idea. It looked like his plan was working. She was thinking about it, but she wasn’t panicking. “Are you the cake in this analogy?”  
  
Amy laughed and smacked his arm playfully. Her hopeless romantic boy. He wanted her to know that he cared about her, and it was working. “You’re impossible.”  
  
“I’m in love.” Steve corrected, kissing the centre of her forehead. “You knew I was a commitment kind of guy before you asked me out.”  
  
Amy sighed and nestled back against him. She had. His loyalty was one of the qualities that had attracted her in the first place. The soft warmth of that love settling over her like a blanket. Her eyes felt heavy. Her mind calmed. “Steve?”  
  
“Yeah, sweetheart?” Steve rested his cheek on her head. They had spent hours sitting together like this when she was recovering from radiation poisoning. It was nice to do it when she was healthy.  
  
Amy curled her fingers sleepily into his sweater. “Take me to bed.”  
  
Steve stood up with Amy in his arms. Who knew how much sleep she would get while she was away. Another couple of hours now could make all the difference. Plus cuddling with Amy and Bucky was Steve’s happy place. “I can do that”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky woke up without Amy’s head on his shoulder. He didn’t like that. Not on the morning she was supposed to be leaving. Steve was still here; Bucky had his leg draped across Steve’s knees, so he was confident of that. He rolled his head to the side. There was his girl, curled half on top of Steve, looking as sweet asleep as she ever did in his dreams. He brushed his knuckle over her cheek. She opened sleepy eyes. God, he loved those eyes. Those impossibly violet eyes. All bright sparks and mischief. He ran his thumb over her lips. Pair them with that incredible mouth and she was irresistible.  
  
Steve opened one eye. A soft smile curled his lips. Bucky loved those eyes too. Little chips of the sky. He had dreamed of those eyes for years. He’d never hoped he’d get to be on the receiving end of that soft adoring smile though. Not really. But here he was, in a decade that had started out looking so bloody and had turned into his personal heaven. Steve loved him back, just as much as Bucky loved Steve, and they had found Amy, the love he hadn't known he was looking for.  
  
Amy nuzzled his fingers, a soft wakefulness changing the set of her limbs ever so slightly. The blankets slipped down as she stirred. She stretched as the cool air met her bare skin. One leg slipped between Steve’s the other she drew up towards her chest, the hem of her nightgown crept up with it. From where he was laying, the stretch would give Bucky more than a little flash of her underwear. He always like the ‘silky little scraps’ as he called them. especially when they matched her nightgown like tonight’s did.  
  
Bucky slipped his hand between Amy and Steve, pulling Amy over on top of him. That wasn’t the kind of invitation he was about to turn down. Not when a good night's sleep and a lazy morning wake up had reminded his body of some of its natural functions. Morning sex was something you only really got in stable relationship, and he wasn’t always up for it. Little Fox’s last morning here felt like a good day to indulge. “Come here, baby girl.”  
  
“What are you doing, Buck?” Steve asked, only a little reluctant to let him take Amy. He loved when she fell asleep on his chest. It was a little more awkward with her having to sleep on her side instead of draped across him face down the way she used to. But the weight of her still felt good, and he could put up with an elbow or a shoulder digging in here and there if it meant he could feel her heartbeat. Doubly so when Bucky piled on too, and Steve to feel them both breathing and living around him.  
  
“Reminding our girl why she wants to hurry home.” Bucky purred, pulling the strap of her nightgown off her shoulder and exposing her nipple, already gratifyingly perky and hard. The little needy whimper when his flicked his tongue over it, drove him crazy. That had to be one of the best noises anyone had ever heard.  
  
Steve rolled onto his side and kissed Bucky’s neck. Buck had a point, they had a few hours before Amy had to leave, it couldn’t hut to give her a little something extra to think about during her lonely nights away. Not that he thought his girl would stray, or stay away longer than she absolutely had to. He wanted to make sure she had something sweet to dream about to help keep away the nightmares. As far as he was concerned there were few things in this world that made for better dreams than the face Bucky made when he came. Amy’s fingers curled into his hair. He thought his girl agreed.


	69. Shopping!

Macy’s Fifth Avenue was crowded no matter what day of the week or time of day. Amy was seriously debating just giving in and hiring a personal shopper like the nouveau riche. It was such a needlessly decadent thing to do, but the inane tedium of picking between seven nearly identical options for crib sheets, all patterned with equally twee cartoon animals in pastel colours, was starting to grate on her. It didn’t help that she’d had to fend off a number of 'well meaning’ people who were unnervingly interested in her medical history and wanted to touch her. Even her normal ice queen demeanour wasn’t repelling them as well as she would like. Apparently, pregnancy softened her intimidating aura. An irritating discovery. She dropped a set of teething toys into her basket without paying much attention beyond establishing that they had clips to stop the baby dropping them.  
  
Brian and Shuri were around, helping her fill out her shopping list like some kind of infant themed scavenger hunt. She wasn’t convinced she needed all the things on the long list. Knowing her boys, their daughter was unlikely to need a bouncy chair to sooth her when no one could pick her up. It was entirely probable her daughter wouldn’t touch the floor until she was ready to start crawling.  
  
She couldn’t shake the feeling that her boys would love to be here. That they would enjoy this shopping experience far more than she was. Steve would carefully weigh the pros and cons of each option. Bucky would be delighted any all the saccharine sweet toys and gadgets. If they were here, she would have a basket full of frilly tutus and animals that made adorable noises, and her eyes wouldn’t be glazing over as she read the feature list on another bassinet. It was a basket for a baby to sleep in, how many features did it need?  
  
She wandered around a display of plush animals in trendy neutral colours, none of which spoke to her. And straight into Tony Stark. Because of course Stark was here. He always seemed to show up when she’d rather he didn’t.  
  
Tony was equally shocked to see her. “What are you doing here?”  
  
“This thing called shopping.” Amy turned her attention to a shelf full of swaddling blankets. Two different kinds, both in soft shades of green, went into her basket. Tony being here didn’t change anything. She was visibly pregnant and shopping for baby supplies, it wasn’t exactly revolutionary behaviour. “You exchange money for goods and services. You should try it some time.”  
  
She moved determinedly to the wall of bottles and bottle accessories. Those at least she didn’t need to compare and contrast. Steve had already picked out two kinds that he thought were ideal. The only decision she had to make was frogs or duckies… or little black cat heads. She knew which one Shuri would pick. A splash of orange at the back of the shelf drew her attention. Or cute little foxes. Perfect. Those went in the basket, along with the second size of bottle in candy bright teal and pink.  
  
The bottle accessories were more of a question. Did they need a bottle warmer? What were the differences between the twenty different kinds of brush?  
  
Tony leaned against the end of the shelf. Studying her earnestly. She was so coldly impassive. What had Steve seen in her. He’d been absolutely devastated when he had thought he lost her, there had to be something. Tony just didn't see. She was so cold... He had been devastated though. Devastated enough that there was no way he had gone on the run without reaching out to her. He got all the reports from the task force, she’d hardly said anything. Aside from the viral video and a handful of reports that hadn’t led anywhere.  
  
Her reports hadn’t led anywhere, and now she was knocked up. Tony could collect those dots. “Where is he, Amy? I can’t help if I don’t know where he is.”  
  
“Help. Is that what you call getting your ass handed to you in the bottom of a missile silo? If he wanted to turn himself in, he would.” Amy inspected a set of bottle brushes that purported to be 'vegan friendly' as if regular brushes were made of bacon.  
  
She settled on a set toting being both 'post-consumer recycled' and 'bpa' free. Steve would like those ones and they should be easy to disinfect.  
  
Tony ducked around in front of her before she could walk away. “The longer he is on the run, the less anyone can do to help him.”  
  
“Then someone should spend some time combing the rainforests of Argentina. Like I’ve been saying in my reports for the last 6 months.” Amy snapped, the irritation in her voice was genuine. No one had followed up on her reports. It would be one thing of they were on the right trail. She could accept not being able to pull the wool over the eyes of _everyone_ in the international intelligence community. The way they were all running around chasing their own tails and jumping at ghosts was just infuriating.  
  
She sighed and made a point of looking slightly pained. She didn’t need to lie to Tony, she just wouldn’t tell him everything. If he’d read any of the reports she had written, he had at least some of the facts already anyway. “I won’t say I haven’t seen him. I have. He sent me a letter, and I ran into him in Russia. He threw a grenade at me. That was in my reports too.”  
  
“I know you said I’m not allowed to spoil her, but how cute is this?” Brain came around the corner of the display, waving a rattle shaped like a sword, a stuffed dragon tucked under one arm. He did a double take when he saw Amy’s conversation partner. “Tony Stark. Lovely seeing you again. Congratulating the goddess, I see.”  
  
“Something like that.” Amy said dismissively. She let him take the basket and add the dragon and the little sword, they were pretty cute.  
  
Brian draped his arm casually around her shoulders. To the untrained ear she sounded as indifferent as always. Brian heard growing frustration. Dai probably would have caught it before now. Unfortunately, Daisuki and Fredrick were busy with final preparations for tomorrow night. Steve might not have been overreacting with his ‘looking after Ayame’ dossier. Some women excelled at being pregnant. Ayame evidently wasn't one of them. “Getting shopped out? Shuri is over judging strollers. We can grab her and head back to the hotel.”  
  
“No, we’re almost done. Help me pick some onesies, then we can go.” She appreciated Brian’s rescue, but she wished it could have been Steve of Bucky. Although Bucky probably would have just silently glared until Tony got nervous and left. He still wasn’t particularly gregarious in broader company. And Steve would have hugged him and asked if he wanted to be one of the god parents, sweet forgiving man that he was.  
  
She couldn’t wait to get back to them.  
  
*****  
  
Steve leaned against the counter, waiting for the coffee to finish dripping through the filter and into the pot. This time of day wasn’t actually all that different from when they were all here. He could almost imagine that Amy was asleep in bed, that if he went to check on her and see if she wanted coffee she would throw a pillow at him.  
  
He knew worrying was pointless. Amy was safe, and surrounded by people who would keep her that way.  
  
Bucky yawned, leaning back against the counter next to Steve. It was going to be another day of digging. Shuri and her mother seemed to have decided that their ‘favourite broken white boy’ was the perfect person to look after all their favourite broken animals. Which meant he needed somewhere to put horses with various injuries, broken legs, torn ligaments, and respiratory issues. Horses meant a paddock. A paddock meant a lot of fence. A lot of fence meant a lot of posts. Which in turn meant a lot of digging post holes. Figuring out how to dig the holes one handed had been a pain, but now that he had the hang of it, it was just tedious.  
  
Steve fiddled with his mug on the counter, spinning it around until it bumped into Bucky’s.  
  
Bucky's wrist flashed and he grinned. Six flashes. Long, shot, long, pause, short, long. That was the custom alert for Amy. He let the bead roll into the palm of his hand, answering the call. It was just voice, but it was still their girl. Her call should help Steve shake off his mopey mood. “Baby girl. Something wrong or did you just miss the sound of our voices?”  
  
“Closer to the second one.” Any sighed.  
  
Steve frowned. She sounded tired, exhausted exasperation weighing down her words. He had known something would happen. Why had they let her go off on her own? “What’s got you upset, sweetheart?”  
  
There was a long pause while she weighed her words. “Brian and I ran into Tony while we were out shopping.”  
  
“He give you any trouble?” Bucky growled. He didn’t like that pause or her tone now that he heard her. If anything had happened to her... If that man had so much as touched a hair on her head…  
  
“Nothing I couldn’t handle.” Amy assured them. There was a long pause while she rearranged fabric on her end. Steve had to assume she was trying to mound the pillows of her bed into something that resembled a comfortable position. He did worry about how well she was sleeping without them there. Was she cold? Did the pillows provide enough support to replace them? He doubted both, based on the way she sighed when the rustling stopped. “I miss you.”  
  
“We miss you too.” Steve cupped Bucky’s hand in his, the closest he could come to holding them both just now.  
  
“Tell me about your day?” Amy asked, voice soft and affectionate. “It will help me sleep.”  
  
Bucky leaned into Steve, pleased as always when an arm slipped around him. This being in love thing was pretty damn great. “I made Steve come help me on the farm yesterday. Don’t want him turning into a mushroom with this dry spell at work and his moping without you here.”  
  
Steve blushed and looked away from Bucky. The morning had been productive. The afternoon less so. They had gone swimming, then Bucky had dragged him to bed for an afternoon nap that didn’t feature as much sleep as it probably should have. From the way Bucky was smirking this afternoon would involve a repeat performance. Steve couldn’t even pretend he didn’t want it to.  
  
Bucky moved on to explaining his plan for the fence. Amy’s breathing slowed. Soft sighs and the sound of her nestling deeper into the blankets drifted soothingly to them.  
  
Steve smiled and rested his head against Bucky’s. She was alright. There was just one thing he, selfishly, wanted. “Before you drift off, sweetheart…”  
  
“I love you, _Mon Ours, Mon Loupe_.” Amy murmured sleepily. She always knew exactly what Steve needed.  
  
“We love you too.” Bucky nuzzled Steve’s neck. Amy’s affections sounded even sweeter when she was almost asleep. They had come so far from those rough first nights when he was terrified of touching Steve and she was scared to sleep around them. This was better. He listened to soft breathy sound of Amy, now soundly asleep. Bucky tipped his face so Steve could kiss him. This was so much better.


	70. The Met Fashion Gala

Shuri peaked out of a gap in the prep tent. So far, this gala thing was a mixed bag. Firmly in the pros column, was getting to dress as fantastically and flamboyantly as she wanted. Her dress was straight off the pages of an afro-punk comic. Crop top, full skirt, head wrap with sharp fan pleats, traditional patterns rendered in neon blue, green, and pink against jet black. The neon blue even glowed when she moved. Her bright pink lipstick and shocking green eyeshadow made her look even more like a comic book. It was her own design. Officially ‘in consultation’ with Amy’s friend Fredrick, unofficially, he had almost cried with joy when she had shown him her initial sketch and told him she could make it light up without clunky battery packs. Shuri liked him. More people should appreciate her inherent brilliance. A couple suggestions on fit and how much of a gap there should be between the skirt and the top, and her look was perfect.  
  
Unfortunately, leading the cons, they had been trapped in this tent for an hour. It had been fun at first. Meeting celebrities, having them fawn over meeting her and her amazing dress, checking out all of their stunning interpretations of the ‘illustration’ brief. Amy and her friends seemed to know everyone. Fredrick was on a first name basis with all of the designers and half the guests, Kiki knew the rest, and Amy was close with the event staff, especially the ones who worked for the museum.  
  
They were in the first half of the walk list for the red carpet, but not right at the start. Something about press coverage and building the hype and placement appropriate to their positions. Shuri was pretty sure that was Outsider speak for needing to follow the rules of protocol. She had really hope that the outside world wouldn’t subject her to boring things like waiting around for protocol.  
  
They were well into the second hour now, and things were starting to drag. “Is there always this much waiting?”  
  
“Modern democratic monarchy is almost all waiting.” Amy carefully adjusted the pair of irises that were nestled in the dark tumble of her hair. Tonight’s look was all about weightlessness. Soft violet silk swirled from a wide empire waistline to the floor. The scrap of cream satin that passed as the dress's bodice floated from the elaborate amethyst bib necklace. Everything about her floated, she hardly touched the floor as she drifted around the space.  
  
Kiki shared an exaggerated eyeroll with Fredrick as he fixed the layers of her kimono. It wasn’t that Amy was wrong. A not insignificant portion of her life these days consisted of waiting. It was that frustrating as inactivity was, she knew she could make a difference. She looked down at her outfit. There were some other perks. Red silk with white flowers and a sleeping cat painted on the hem, a long horizontal slash just above the cat cut through the top two robes, a near perfect recreation of her favourite woodblock print.  
  
“Alright princesses. You’re up next.” The red-carpet coordinator chirped. “Happy eyes and remember to pose with your head and body.”  
  
“Thank Bastet.” Shuri grumbled. She smoothed her skirts carefully, pleased at the ripple of digital lights that cascaded away from her touch. Waiting had been boring, but it was worth it to show off her dress.  
  
*****  
  
Amy drifted from one cluster of cameras to the next, her skirt fanning out behind her or twisting dramatically around her legs when she stopped. She kept her expression elegantly neutral, even as the photographers called for her to smile. She never smiled for their photos. They always seemed to turn out anyway. It was why her image was usually accompanied by adjectives like 'timeless’, or ‘serene’, occasionally 'aloof'.  
  
There were a handful, she knew, where she had dropped that mysterious façade. Photos from the few public events she had attended on Steve’s arm where she hadn’t been able to repress a slight curl of her lips. She smiled more when she was Steve. Even more around the combination of Steve and Bucky. She wished they were here now. She wanted Steve to take her in with his artistic eye. She wanted to see that glint that told her he would be drawing her later. She wanted Bucky to look her up and down, lick his lips licentiously, and make a comment about getting her out of her dress. She wanted the part after that when he set his hand on the small of he back, and kissed her shoulder softly, because as much as he wanted to tear her clothes off, he was happy just to be close to her. She wanted the part at the very end of the night, where they went back to their room and Bucky complained because he couldn’t undress her one handed so Steve did it for him. Where they were too tired from the party to do much more than kiss lazily and fall asleep in a tangle of limbs.  
  
She couldn’t have that and keep them safe. She settled for arching her neck and fanning her skirt, so it flared particularly dramatically. She’d run her real errands tomorrow, then she could get back to them.  
  
Brain sidled up next to her as they reached the British press, his hand on the small of her back. “Steady on, goddess. Just a few more hours.”  
  
“Smile and try to look like you adore me.” Amy looked down in a way the press was sure to interpret as sweet infatuation. They would probably even claim she blushed. Her pulse was as slow and even, her cheeks cool as ever. She appreciated his reminder that she had people on her side. She wasn’t trying to save her boys alone. Her friends had stakes in this too.  
  
*****  
  
Pepper scanned the mingling guests. The Met Costume Institute Gala was always a highlight of the year. Even more so since Tony had promoted her to CEO and she had started being able to attend as more than an assistant. Her dress for tonight was a work of art. A wireframe of a lily dominated the bodice, the petals curling like a low sweetheart neckline, the stem plunging down the centre front almost to her waist. Low as it was, Pepper didn’t feel the slightest expose. The intricate crisscross of black lines turned what could have been an intimidating expanse of skin into a hundred little glimpses. The back was largely open too, a pair of wireframe leaves framing the low dip. The skirt was lily shaped, floating out around her, bright white with narrow blue lines forming a perfect grid, the background reference frame for a 3D model. It was elegant and chicly modern at the same time. The writer for Vogue who had interviewed her on the stairs had flatteringly assured her she had a place at the top of best dressed list.  
  
Tony's suit was a blueprint technical drawing of a formal three-piece suit. Complete with measurements and animated holograms diagrams for how to fold the pocket square and the whole construction that showed up when he stood still. He had giggled like a schoolboy when she had shown him the initial design.  
  
They weren’t alone in their fabulousness. All 500 of the guests looked amazing. She spotted two Beatrix Potter inspired outfits, and one that had to be based on the works of M.C. Escher. This why Pepper loved the gala. So much creativity on display.  
  
A familiar face caught Pepper’s eye. Ayame Winters drifting through the crowed. And looking particularly fabulous, she was an art nouveau print come to life. Come to life and knocked up. There was no mistaking the swell under her wide sash. It made her graceful aura even more impressive. Pepper could already see the headlines on the best dressed lists tomorrow, ‘ethereal’, 'Madonna like', ‘imperial’.  
  
And Ayame’s dress was nothing compared to the one her friend Kiki was wearing. Pepper was starting to think she would have to settle for third best dressed. Princess Kyoko was regal in a scarlet kimono. Pepper didn’t recognise the young woman that rounded out their party. She was adorable.  
  
Pepper linked her arms through Tony's and nodded towards the women. “Doctor Winters looks lovely tonight. Is that the Princess of Wakanda with her?”  
  
“She’s hiding something. She knows where they are. I think the baby is Steve’s.” Tony said it all very fast. He knew he was right. He knew it. There was absolutely no proof. All of the double checking he had done had Amy coming up squeaky clean. She’d even been right about no one listening to her reports. But he still knew, deep down in his gut, that there was something she wasn’t telling them.  
  
Pepper narrowed her eyes. He was jumpy again. She had thought his paranoia was getting better, but there was no way Ayame was helping Steve. _Maybe_ Natasha. But not Steve. Their breakup had been brutal and, based on the summery reports she had read over Tony’s shoulder, Ayame was working towards their capture just as diligently as he was. There was also no way that Tony was jumping straight to ‘the baby is Steve’s’ if he was just finding out she was pregnant. “What did you do, Tony?”  
  
*****  
  
Tony’s explanation left a lot to be desired. Accosting Ayame while she was shopping for the baby was quintessentially Tony. It also explained why he had come home without the baby shower present he was supposed to be picking up. Even by Tony’s account she had been perfectly polite, and her story matched up with everything he knew. Ayame was working as Ambassador to Wakanda, helping review and compile intelligence to find the rouge avengers, even sporadically going into the field after them. The only evidence Tony had that she was anything other than completely above board was his gut.  
  
Pepper found it hard to believe that someone as obviously devoted to her own comfort and beauty would slum it with Steve and the other fugitives. All of their sightings had been in rough and inhospitable areas, their gear was wearing out and from the last pictures she had seen they needed a shower. Amy was sparklingly clean and wearing silk so fine that it would shred under the slightest stress. It made a lot more sense for Amy’s baby to be fathered by the handsome man who’d been hanging on her arm all night. Pepper was pretty sure he was the same Duke that Tony had thought she was cheating on Steve with last year.  
  
There was one way to prove it. Talk to her. And if Pepper was there, she could stop Tony from doing anything stupid. “Doctor Winters, how are you? You’re glowing.”  
  
“Ms. Pots, I’m lovely.” Amy exchanged light air kisses with Pepper. “Well, aside from the fact my baby’s father apparently picked up a degree in obstetrics while I wasn’t looking.”  
  
“You don’t have to be an obstetrician to know that eating your body weight in raw fish is a bad idea.” Brian sighed, completely exasperated. He’d been trying to chase her away from the hors d'oeuvres tray all night. With no help from Dai, and significantly less success than he was willing to admit.  
  
Amy glared up at him. Seriously, it was like none of the men in her life had heard of pregnancy cravings. They should be going out of their way to find her the food she wanted. Not telling her off at every opportunity. “Do you know how hard it is to get sushi in an isolated _landlocked_ country? You can take my tuna roll from me when you pry it from my cold dead hands.”  
  
“We had the same argument about unpasteurised cheese yesterday.” Brian rolled his eyes conspiratorially at Pepper. He’d played this game with Amy before, she hated to lie to people, but for some reason no one ever called her for telling the truth. Like the fact that he and Amy had argued over her eating the raw milk brie at lunch, but the argument had been based around the fact Steve would kill him if he found out Brian had let her eat it without at least a token protest. It was strange to think that Captain America was the one he was afraid of when I came to Aims, not the Winter Soldier.  
  
“Where are our manors? How are you? I saw your profile in Time Magazine, stunning.” Kiki linked her hand through Amy’s other arm, forming a protective vanguard around her. Between the two of them and Dai, they managed to keep the conversation flowing naturally and redirect it back to Tony and Pepper without arousing suspicion. The best lie was always no lie at all. The best way to avoid having to lie was to never talk about yourself. It was a game they had played for years.  
  
*****  
  
Tony and Pepper were seated a few tables over from the Japanese princesses and their party. Not so close that they could continue their conversation, but close enough that they could observe. Not that there was much to observe. Ayame’s table was rounded out by a couple of designers dressed in Alice in Wonderland inspired outfits, and it looked like they were having a completely normal meal. If anything, they were having more fun that Pepper was at her own table full mixed celebrities and corporate types. Next year she was specifically requesting not to be seated with the loud hotelier, he always made her eye twitch. Meanwhile at the other table with Ayame and her new beau, everyone was smiling and laughing. The conversation looked like it was centred around the construction of everyone’s costumes. Which would be a lot more fun than ‘stock dividends’ and ‘personal brands’, if Pepper wanted to work tonight, she would have stayed at work.  
  
“Feel silly yet?” Pepper raised one eyebrow and nodded over her shoulder at the table where Brian had his arm draped over the back of Amy’s chair.  
  
Tony glared at the back of Amy’s head sceptically. At that moment her cousin had reached over to feel her stomach, while the handsome blonde beamed proudly. The whole picture was somehow too quaint. Not staged, but not genuine either. There was definitely affection there, but it wasn’t the same kind of affection she’d had with Steve. “I’m not convinced.”


	71. Asking For Help

Bucky loved mornings, waking up next to Steve and Amy, remembering that he was free, revelling in the luxurious softness of the sheets. They glowed with a dream like pleasure. It was evenings that really brought home the changes in his life. He loved them too. There was something blissfully domestic about coming home to find Steve cooking dinner. He had missed the sound of the debates that had replaced Steve and Amy’s fighting these last few days, and the near constant sound of Amy typing. He wasn’t worried about her the way Steve was, but he wished she was back with them.  
  
With them forever. Steve had agreed they needed to wait before they asked her, but that didn’t mean they couldn’t talk about it. Maybe the sight of Steve humming and frying off a pair of steaks had him in a particularly romantic mood.  
  
Bucky wrapped his arm around Steve from behind and kissed down his neck. “So, how do we ask our girl to be a part of this whole, happily married, spending the rest of our lives together, thing?”  
  
“I tried. You stopped me.” Steve laughed, rubbing Bucky’s arm affectionately. He’d napped at the farm today, leaving Steve to work alone for most of the day. He’d gotten a lot done, summarised a good chunk of intelligence, laid a false digital trail to make it look like they were in Finland. If he had spent an indecent amount of time pouring over press coverage from last night’s gala, no one else needed to know. Bucky would understand if he saw what Amy was wearing.  
  
“You were going to fuck it up again.” Bucky stole a floret of cauliflower of one of the waiting plates. Steve’s plate, because it was no fun if he was sneaking _his own_ vegetables.  
  
“But you think I’m capable of not fucking it up. That’s good.” Steve laughed, smacking Bucky’s hand away from their dinner. He had a sneaking suspicion that when he tried to serve, the pilfered plate wouldn’t end up as Bucky’s. They had come a long way from when Bucky would sneak food _on_ to his plate. Not that Bucky didn’t insist on feeding Steve. He was just more equal opportunity about it now.  
  
Bucky kissed Steve’s neck tenderly, sliding his hand down Steve’s abs. “I think if we put our heads together, we can figure out most things.”  
  
Steve turned around and grabbed Bucky’s hips. He wasn’t allowed to say something sweet and make a move five seconds after insulting him. Steve had his dignity, even if he couldn’t stop himself from smiling. He didn’t have _that_ much dignity. “Okay wise guy. You tell me. How do we ask Ayame?”  
  
“I don’t know.” Bucky sighed and leaned back. He rubbed his neck thoughtfully. “Commitment freaks her out. She’s with us, but she’s still so scared. There has to be a way to make her feel safe.”  
  
Steve licked his lips. Make her feel safe. If they couldn’t manage it, there was only one person he could think of who had a better shot at it. “We need to call Dai.”  
  
*****  
  
The good thing about Brunch was none of the foods raised Amy’s overprotective companion’s ire. At least it hadn’t once she had acquiesced and let them over cook her eggs. Firm yolks were a small price to pay for a meal full of delicacies that her boys couldn’t pull off in their kitchen at home. She’d talked them into a multi-course affair, the company and conversation were both excellent, and this late in her pregnancy she really should have put on more weight than she had. A large meal with plentiful calories and proteins was more than justified. She had spent the better part of an hour lazily eating her way through a traditional American breakfast with all the sides and listening to Shuri banter with her friends.  
  
Dai’s phone buzzed and he broke off his sentence to check the caller ID. “I have to take this.”  
  
Amy was distracted from asking who was calling by the arrival of the waitress with the check. By the time she had waved off Brian and Shuri, he was already walking away from the table with phone to his ear. She caught the tail end of his greeting, ‘what’s wrong? What do you want?’, probably work then. He wasn’t usually that brusque with social acquaintances.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky rolled a bead out of his bracelet and set it on the table, where it glowed softly. A few quick flicks of his wrist brought up a secure phone line and a keypad. Steve dialled, and they waited while it rang.  
  
They had to wait an interminable length of time. Dai didn't answer until the fourth ring.  
  
“What’s wrong? Why are you calling?” Dai never wasted time on pleasantries.  
  
“Nothing is wrong.” Bucky answered tightly.  
  
“We need some advice.” Steve squared his shoulders. He’d never asked for permission to marry someone before. Not that that was what they were doing. Ayame would never put up with someone else feeling they had the right to dictate who she spent her life with. They were just looking for advice. But at the same time, if Dai didn’t approve... “Dai. We love Amy. Both of us. More than breathing. She completes us. Balances us. With Amy we’re –“  
  
“We want to ask her to marry us. How do we do it?” Bucky sunk in on himself after the question. It was the longest thing he had said to anyone outside their little extended family with the exception of the kids who helped on the farm. Steve was right. Daisuki was their best bet for feeling out how to do this right. That didn’t change the fact he hated talking to people outside the immediate group. Inside Wakanda, he wasn’t a monster. He was Shuri’s pet project, if he was anything. Outside Wakanda, he was still a wanted terrorist and murderer.  
  
“Which one of you is asking?”  
  
Steve curled his hand around Bucky’s knee. They could do this. There were complications, but they could overcome them. “Both. I know it is unorthodox, but it is legal here and we belong together.”  
  
There was a long silence on the other end of the line. A clunk, some distant rustling, but not response. Bucky sat perfectly still, counting his heartbeats, and trying not to panic. What if Dai didn’t approve? What if he told Amy to leave them, that they were getting too attached? They couldn’t lose Amy. They couldn’t.  
  
Steve rubbed soothing circles on Bucky’s back, forcing himself to breath normally. Everything would be alright. Worst case scenario nothing changed. Amy loved them. She wouldn’t abandon them if they didn’t force her too, and this time he wasn’t about to make their relationship contingent on her answer.  
  
Finally, there was a sound like Dai picking up the handset again. “Don’t go anywhere. I'll be in touch.”  
  
The phone line went dead.  
  
Bucky stared at the still glowing display. That could be good. Or it could be very bad. “Odds on him trying to kill us?”  
  
Steve leaned back into the couch. That was an excellent question. Whatever Dai thought of their plan, he didn’t think Dai would take it that badly. On the other hand, he couldn’t forget the last time he’d asked Amy to marry him. “Better not speculate… The good news is the force field will stop any drone attacks.”  
  
Bucky's jaw twitched. Drone strikes weren’t what worried him. He snapped the bead back into his bracelet. He was being irrational. Amy loved them. She wasn’t about to leave.  
  
*****  
  
Dai had made his excuses and left as soon as he finished his call. A quick fist bump goodbye for Amy and a kiss on the cheek for Fredrick. Amy had followed his lead. Leaving Brian and Fredrick to escort Shuri on a day of sightseeing. It was time to tackle the real reason she was in New York.  
  
The door to the sanctuary opened before she knocked. The house rearranging to give her a clear path to the rooftop patio. She settled in a lounge chair, pleased when a pot of tea appeared on the table next to her smelling fragrantly of jasmine. Old magic was always such a pleasure to interact with. It was good to be recognised for what she was.  
  
She was halfway through her second cup of tea when Strange pooffed onto the roof, cape billowing behind him. Amy set her cup down and turned to face him, a calm professional expression turning up the corners of her mouth.  
  
Strange was frowning. Confused and not overly pleased at her appearance. “If you are here about Mordo, I have it under control.”  
  
“You don’t. But I’m not here for your magical skills.” Amy tossed a file on the table. The Sorceress had a number of internal issues. She wasn’t about to get involved if they didn’t specifically ask for her help. “I need you to be a doctor.”  
  
The sorcerer raised an eyebrow curiously and picked up the file. Bucky’s medical file was easily half and inch thick. Some of the identifying information had been redacted, date of birth blacked out, any pictures with his face removed. He still wouldn’t be entirely anonymous, there were only so many cybernetically enhanced soldiers out there. Let alone ones with a metal arm. Even on reasonably tightly focused scans, there was no way to hide the hardware that connected his arm housing to his brain, they followed the left side of the spine and disappeared off the edge of the film into the left shoulder. Strange’s eyes followed the cabling to the bottom of the page. “Do you know where… the patient… is?”  
  
“I have a very good idea.” Amy maintained her relaxed posture, crossing her ankles delicately, not letting any hint of anxiety show. Location had been easier to mask than identity. Even if Strange guessed, a few credible sightings would be enough to overcome any suspicions based on a tip from someone so unconnected to the case.  
  
“What do you want me to do?” Strange paged through more of the file, inspecting the list of medications and therapies that had been tried. The final regimen the had been adopted eventually was a relatively simple cocktail of anti-depressants and anti-psychotics, with an additional anti-anxiety prescription to be administered as needed. High doses, but nothing out of the ordinary for someone suffering from severe PTSD.  
  
Amy freed the largest most complete scan from the file. She tapped the problematic area. It really wasn’t all that big. It would hardly be a problem at all if it wasn’t somehow generating its own power. “He needs to have _this_ removed.” She traced the bright lines of wire lacing the delicate flesh. Bucky had a beautiful mind. But his physical brain was a mess. “Without doing any more damage.”  
  
Strange exchanged the older Leviathan scan he was holding for the one Amy had selected. He held the film up to the light. Squinting at the contrast between the white and grey matter, the sharp definition of all the wires, even where they were surrounded by scar tissue. “What is this imaging?”  
  
“A friends proprietary technology. It’s live and interactive when he is hooked up to it.” Amy answered, keeping her voice calm and detached. Hooked up wasn’t exactly accurate. That was one of the reasons Bucky could stand the scans. Her sweet boy didn’t like electronics on his scalp. Some days he couldn’t even handle the little beads that buzzed around a few inches away.  
  
Strange dropped the transparent film back onto the file, his academic curiosity turning to dismay. “I can’t do it.”  
  
Amy’s mask of calm developed a hairline fracture. He had to be able to do it. There was no one else who could.  
  
“After the accident, when I learned how to use the dimensional energies,” Strange held his hands out between them palms down. They quivered. Muscle tremors racking him. “I had to choose. Between the magic and my hands…”  
  
“You chose the magic.” Amy finished for him. It was the first time he had ever shown any vulnerability to Amy. Under other circumstances she would consider it a victory. Not today. Not when Bucky’s life relied on her ability to pull off this surgery. Amy racked her brain for alternatives. She couldn’t think of another neurosurgeon they could trust. Certainly not one with the level of skill this surgery called for. There had to be another option. “Could you talk someone else through it?”  
  
Strange considered, looking over the brain scans again. “Maybe. If they were a good enough surgeon already.”  
  
Renewed hope sparked in Amy’s chest. Strange was very precise. If he needed a neurosurgeon, he would have specified neurosurgeon. If any subspecialty would do, they still had options. “Doctor May Winters. Is she good enough?”  
  
“She’s been doing those heart stent implantations without bypass.” Strange asked looking over the medications again. A couple of them were vasodilators, those could cause bleeding issues. Then there was the proximity to the corpus callosum and the way the wires wrapped around the internal carotid artery.  
  
“That’s her.” Amy thanked the gods that the world was tiny at the top of most professions and that surgery was no exception. Strange knew who her sister in law was, they had spoken at some of the same conferences. Amy didn’t need to lay out May’s credentials.  
  
Steady hands, interactive imagery with more detail than anything he had seen before, his expertise. It would be a hard surgery, but not impossible. “She could probably do it.”  
  
Amy closed her eyes as a wave of relief watched over her. May would help. Amy would have to fill her in on everything, which would be exciting, but family came first. She would help. Bucky was going to be alright.  



	72. Surprise Visitors

Sunset in New York was always a breath-taking thing. Warm peachy light glinting off the tall sleek buildings. Amy relaxed into a lounge chair on the deck to watch the colours change. She hoped she wasn’t rationalising her decision to go to May. Her brother’s wife had always been sheltered from this part of her world. Matt had worked hard to keep her safe. The closest she had ever really come had been patching Amy up after the Winter Soldier had shot her. A rather dramatic introduction to the family, and not something that would endear Bucky to her. This wouldn’t exactly put her in danger. Bucky was harmless… or as harmless as anyone in her life was.  
  
Shuri dropped cross legged onto the chair next to Amy. Her day of museums and shopping had been fun. Fredrick was a blast and Brian had the best commentary. There were twenty shopping bags in the suite’s living room, all filled with fantastic clothes.  
  
She didn’t think the Ambassador’s day had been as fun as hers had been. She was quiet, thoughtful, Shuri couldn’t say she looked stressed, she looked… well she looked neutral, the kind of blank expression you could project your own emotions onto. She definitely didn’t look relaxed the way she should if everything was set for the surgery. At least Shuri thought she didn’t. She wondered if White Wolf would be able to read Amy from a photo. It was probably easier to just ask. “Well?”  
  
“Small set back. I need to make another stop.” Amy tapped her phone against her lips. It wasn’t suspicious. Who wouldn’t stop in and visit family when they were close? And a six-hour flight was the closest she had been in months. There was something to be said for layers of explanation though. If there was something more distracting going on than her taking personal lunch. Like Oakland’s newly minted golden child checking on the construction of her pet project. “How would you feel about visiting California?”  
  
*****  
  
The sound of someone knocking on the suite’s door confused Steve. It was rare to begin with. It was unheard of when Amy wasn’t here. Anyone looking for Bucky sent him a message through his kimoyo beads. Anyone looking for him… sent Bucky a message. It was usually Shuri looking to guinea pig some black panther tec on him, or T’Challa looking for a sparring partner. He didn’t get out much when he was here. He didn’t mind being a homebody, when home was Bucky and Amy and the fun part of planning missions.  
  
Dai dropped his hand. “Told you I’d be in touch.”  
  
Steve stepped back surprised. It wasn’t the sudden appearance of Amy’s cousin that shocked him. It was the women standing behind her. He managed to pull himself together enough to remember to bow, elbowing Bucky so he would copy. “Lady Sakura. We are honoured, but I’m afraid Ayame isn’t here.”  
  
Sakura brushed past all of them, making straight for the best armchair. “I am aware. We need to have a conversation. I thought it better to have it without my dear niece interrupting. She can be rather over protective.”  
  
Steve and Bucky exchanged a worried look. If this estimable woman wanted to have a conversation, their plan to marry Amy might not be as straight forwards as they had anticipated. Steve cleared his throat. “I'll make tea.”  
  
Steve clattered around the kitchen, boiling water, and trying to remember how Amy did this when she wasn’t feeling lazy. The more he did the more he felt like he was missing steps. She could perfectly picture the graceful twist of her wrist, but had no idea what that movement actually accomplished. He gave up and just made tea the way his Ma had always taught him to.  
  
“Stop. Please. Just...” Sakura looked physically pained by what Steve was doing. She waved imperiously at Diasuki. “Help the poor boy.”  
  
“Yes ma'am.” Dai leapt to his feet and shooed Steve out of the kitchen.  
  
Steve perched anxiously next to Bucky on the couch and waited. Neither of them tried to initiate the conversation. A tight sense of dread settled between them. Sakura sat tall, proud, and calm in her chair, serine and unruffled by the tense silence. She looked unarmed. Bucky wasn’t fooled, Amy looked unarmed most of the time too. Even unarmed she was one of the biggest threats he had ever encountered. Bucky pressed his knee against Steve’s. He’d always known his little Fox was a predator. Now he could see where she had gotten it from. There was something inhuman about this woman.  
  
Finally, Dai set a laden tray on the coffee table. The heavy iron tea pot surrounded by delicate jade green teacups shot through with gold veins. Dai knelt at the corner of the table, with a little bow for his Aunt.  
  
Sakura lifted the tea pot, holding her sleeve back off her wrist elegantly as she poured. She passed each of the men a full cup, with a small smile. “Now then. Daisuke tells me you wish to ask for my niece’s hand in marriage. After our last conversation I was under the impression that you were comfortable as her paramour. I hadn’t realized you wanted a more formal bond.”  
  
Steve blinked. He thought he had been upfront about his intentions towards Amy. He wanted to spend the rest of his life with her. Now with her and Bucky. “I always did.”  
  
“Did you?” She tipped her head enigmatically. Her face the same smooth mask that Amy wore.  
  
Steve turned the teacup in his hands. They didn’t use Amy’s good tea set often, everyone in the suite preferred a more practical drinking vessel for day to day use. He’d never noticed, the gold wasn’t decoration, the cup had been broken and reassembled with the chasing. Broken and yet more beautiful for it, just like the people he loved. “I never wanted to sully her reputation by thinking I could have the best parts of her without the responsibility of the rest of her. I should have made my intentions clearer. To everyone.”  
  
Sakura considered his words for a long second, before switching tact. “I must say, I’m not overly impressed by what you can offer her. There are, what, ten rooms in the suite?”  
  
Bucky looked down at his tea. So that was the game. Figure out if they were worthy of Amy. Well, he and Steve had a crap hand when it came to material possessions. Might as well put everything on the table right away. “We can’t even offer her this.”  
  
Sakura raised a delicate eyebrow. “Excuse me?”  
  
“This isn’t ours.” Bucky took a sip of the scalding tea. It was the blend Amy liked in the afternoon. Very steadying. He could almost feel Amy’s hand resting on his shoulder. Their cards might be crap. But a crap hand had never held them back before, between him and Steve they could turn the truth into a win. “This is Amy’s. I’ve got a one room hut and a dozen goats to my name, Steve’s got even less.”  
  
“I see.” Sakura's eyebrows rose even higher. “What can you offer?”  
  
“Love.” Steve answered smoothly. Bucky wanted to go with the whole truth. The whole truth was money didn’t matter and they belonged together. He curled his hand around Bucky’s knee. “Amy doesn’t need anything material. She’s rich. She’s politically connected. She can defend herself. What she needs is love. Unconditional love. We love her. We'll support her no matter what. She needs people to remind her that she doesn’t always have to be on. That she is valuable as more than just a weapon.”  
  
Bucky set down his tea. Leaning back to rest his arm behind Steve. They had one last trump card to play, the only other thing Bucky thought would influence this woman. “Plus, we’re about the only ones who stand a chance protecting her from the kind of thing that’s an actual threat to her.”  
  
A tiny smile quirked the corner of Sakura’s mouth. Steve took that as an encouraging sign. It would take more than mild amusement to make Amy’s aunt show emotion.  
  
“She loves them. You’ve seen how much.” Dai said softly. Sakura had been in Mongolia. She had witnessed Amy’s plan to sacrifice everything to give the men a chance a freedom and a life together. In the end it was hard to deny Amy had gained more than she had given up. Even with her on the other side of the world and focused on keeping her boys safe, his cousin had been more herself than he had seen her in years.  
  
“Very well. You have my blessing. And the blessings of our Grandmother. Ask her when you are ready.” Sakura swept the hem of her kimono neatly out of the way as she stood to go.  
  
Steve and Bucky both leapt respectfully to their feet. Their deference earned them another pleased smile and a thoughtful nod. Her decision was obviously decisive. The boys exchanged a quick look. It looked a lot like they had just asked and earned permission to marry Amy. Not exactly how they had planned to spend their day, but not an unwelcome development. It wasn’t actually an answer to the question of how to ask her. But it was another point in their favour for when the time came.  
  
Bucky hurried ahead to open the door as Sakura drifted towards the exit. Outside of the door an orange circle of sparks surrounded a hole in reality that let out on a picturesque view of the Japanese countryside. Bucky looked back at Steve, it was always hard to say what was normal and what wasn’t these days. Foldable wings and bird shaped robot drone, normal. Guy in a bullet proof cat costume, normal, and a pretty great friend when you got to know him. From Steve’s wide slightly panicked eyes he gathered that the portal thing still fell firmly in the not normal category. That was good to know.  
  
Sakura stopped in the doorway and patted Bucky’s cheek. “ _My niece is trouble. So are you Kintsukouroi*. Look after her. And look after that big Captain of yours. Love strong enough to overcome the evil in the world is a rare and valuable thing._ ” Her Japanese was light and crisp, like sweet plum wine.  
  
“ _Thank you, Auntie._ ” Bucky bowed and responded in the same language. He was taking a liberty calling her Auntie, but he thought she would accept it as the affection it was. She approved of his and Steve’s intentions towards her nice. They were going to be family soon. She had been in Mongolia too. There she had been a calm confident presence. This was where Amy had learned that timeless grace of hers. And probably her ineffable belief that her plans would work. His girl was so confident, when it came to everything other than them.  
  
“ _Yes, I see why she is fond of you. Impertinent boy_.” She pinched his cheek, before drifting through the portal.  
  
Dai sighed, stopping next to Steve before he followed Sakura. “Let me know when you ask her. There are people who will have to be notified on our end.”  
  
“Thanks for this, Dai.” Steve understood why Dai still wasn’t their biggest fan. They’d stolen his best friend and basically locked her away from the world. Once their baby was born and Bucky’s brain was fixed, he would work on finding a way for them to return to the world at large. Who knew, maybe aliens would invade again, and he could get them pardoned for saving the world.  
  
“She loves you.” Dai said, affectionately exasperated. “I don’t get it, but she does. Hurt her again and I will end you.”  
  
“Understood.” Steve didn’t doubt that for a moment. If he hurt Amy again Dai had every right to be at the front of the line of people after his hide. He would have to settle for second in line. If he hurt Ayame, Steve would be the first to punish himself. He watched a bemused Bucky inspect the wall outside their door. No, Dai would have to settle for third. If he messed things up with Amy for a third time, he would end up looking down the sights of a very angry Winter Soldier.  
  
*****  
  
Sunshine in San Francisco wasn’t exactly a rarity, it was the breeze off the bay that soothed Amy’s nerves. There was nothing like a sea breeze to cool you off, mentally and physically. Amy watched the dappled shade from a weeping birch tree shift and dance. Her brother’s back yard was a steadying oasis in and of itself, an Americanized version of the moss garden at the Fox pavilion. The house and landscaping had been her wedding present to the couple. The elegance should have been undermined by the kid’s toys scattered across the grass, Amy was finding them charming today.  
  
May bustled out of the house balancing a full tray. Amy showing up out of the blue wasn’t an unheard-of event. May hadn’t even batted an eye before welcoming her. “I made lemon ginger. It helped me with the girls. My stomach was rocky the whole way through.”  
  
“The first trimester was a little rough. I’m doing better now.” Amy helped her set out the teacups.  
  
May reached over to pour Amy’s tea. “So, who’s the father?”  
  
Amy swirled the warm green liquid. It was a reasonable question. There were a lot of men in Amy’s life who would make good sperm donors, and not a lot who would make good fathers or life partners. Not for her at least. The best candidate had been Steve. And officially he was well off the table. It was time to face the reason Amy was here, filling May in on the _unofficial_ story. “That’s where things get complicated.”  
  
*****  
  
May sat frozen for a long time when Amy finished her story. She wouldn’t believe it if she wasn’t holding the file herself. Brain surgery. On the Winter Soldier. The Winter Soldier who wasn’t the father or Amy’s daughter, but was involved with both her and the father. May wasn’t under any illusion as to who the unnamed man was. It could only be Steve Rogers. Despite them being the two most wanted men in the world, Amy had somehow developed a romantic relationship, with both Captain America and the Winter Soldier. From the sound of it the healthiest relationship she had ever had. None of which made sense. Amy and the Winter Soldier had a history. A violent one. “He shot you!”  
  
“That wasn’t his fault.” It hadn’t been Bucky shooting at her, it had been the Winter Soldier. He’d been under orders. She had killed the man he was supposed to protect. She would have written it off as fortunes of war even if he hadn’t been brainwashed at the time. As it was, she could never hold it against him.  
  
May just stared at her incredulous. “Two high calibre rounds to the chest was some sort of misunderstanding?”  
  
“It was an unfortunate confluence of circumstance.” Amy topped off May's teacup with as much dignity as she could manage. Technically, only one of the rounds had hit her in the chest. Which was more of a testament to Hydra wasting Bucky’s talents than anything. Given full control of his mind and body, she doubted her boy would have missed like that. “This surgery will stop it from happening again.”  
  
May glanced down at the topmost scan. There was so much scarring. Not all of it due to the implants. She had seen scans like this before. Men who had served with her husband, the ones who had been tortured. The amount of electricity that must have been pumped through the poor man… And Amy loved him. The fact she was here was evidence of that. “What happens if I say no?”  
  
“I don’t know.” Amy shook her head and let her shoulders slump just a hair. The limbo they were in wasn’t great for Bucky, but he wasn’t having the seizures anymore, and avoiding stressful situations seemed to minimize the number of breaks. They could muddle through the way they had the last few weeks. No one would like it, but they could. She touched belly. The baby complicated things. They couldn’t put her at risk. Which meant if they couldn’t do the surgery, they couldn’t leave her alone with Bucky. That would break his heart, but he would be the first to insist on protecting her above all else. “We’ll figure something out, but I don’t know what the other options are. This surgery was our last good idea.”  
  
May bit her lip and tapped the file thoughtfully. “Everyone will be safer if the implant comes out, won’t they?”  
  
“Yes.” Amy sat a little straighter. It wasn’t just Bucky that would be safe. No one would be able to use him to do terrible things anymore either. The world would be free of the last Winter Soldier. Her sweet boy would be free.  
  
May looked up at her sister in law. There was more to it than just protecting the world at large. “And you love him?”  
  
“I love them both.” Amy bit her lip. It was still strange saying it out loud. She did. She couldn’t even imagine what her life would be like without them. “They’re good people, May. They make me feel safe.”  
  
May gently slipped the scans back into the file. She couldn’t leave a patient in a condition where he might hurt himself or someone else. She would want to help even if Amy hadn’t been emotionally involved. For someone Amy loved, she couldn’t say no. “I can’t make any promises, you know that, right?”  
  
Amy set a hand on May's forearm. She knew. There were no guaranties when it came to surgery, especially not ones as delicate as this. Things happened. “You can promise to try.”  
  
May covered Amy’s hand and squeezed gently. “I will try.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Kintsukouroi doesn't really translate, but it's this -https://mymodernmet.com/kintsugi-kintsukuroi/- like the teacups.


	73. Home For A Rest

The visit from Amy’s Aunt did nothing to help with Steve’s nightmares. He managed to stop himself from screaming and waking Bucky up two out of three times, which had to count for something. Bucky seemed to suspect he had missed some of them though and spent the morning codling him as much as possible.  
  
Steve had gone through three of his special punching bags. Knowing that Amy’s family approved had relived one anxiety. Tony’s presence at Macy's and the Met Gala had caused another. Steve had been assuming that Tony would hear about Amy’s visit to the States second hand. Tony was the smartest person he knew, and he had seen what Amy looked like when she attended that kind of event with someone she loved. It would be all too easy for him to put the facts together and get the right answer. He kept having visions of the Iron Legion bursting into the bedroom where Amy and Bucky were sleeping.  
  
Then there was yesterday’s call from Amy. She had to make another stop. Some complication with her first choice for a surgeon. She said it was fine, that they were still secure, and she had a plan B, but he wasn’t going to feel good about it until she was safely home, and Bucky’s surgery was scheduled.  
  
After dinner Bucky banished Steve to burn off some of his energy while he cleaned up their rooms. With Amy away they had fallen into some bad bachelor habits, clothes all over the bedroom floor, water stains on the bathroom mirror, three days’ worth of dishes in the sink. Their girl was due back late tonight or tomorrow morning. Bucky wanted her to come home to a clean apartment.  
  
Amy sighed as she let herself into the suite. The flight from California had been long. Shuri had crashed an hour in, snoring away to the sounds of her Movie. Amy had worked. Sleeping on a plane wasn’t exactly an option for her. All she wanted to do was fall into bed with her boys for a few hours… and then get some sleep.  
  
Bucky froze, surprise turning to delight as the reality of her presence hit him. He dropped the laundry and rushed to her. “Baby girl!”  
  
Amy laughed, her luggage tumbling to the ground as she let him sweep her off her feet. “Bucky baby.”  
  
“You’re home.” He hefted her a little higher in his grip, so she was sitting on his forearm. Was he imagining it, or was there more belly there even in just the week she had been away? Either way she was glowing, although that might not be the pregnancy. That might be a combination of his joy that she was home, and her own bright smile.  
  
“I’m home.” Amy whispered back, sliding her hands into his hair. She was home and she had never been happier.  
  
Bucky bumped his forehead against hers, tipping his head so their noses slid easily alongside his. His lips brushed hers. Softly the first time, then more firmly as she kissed him back. His tongue found its way into her mouth, tasting the sweetness of her. He loved her kisses, the gentle and the fierce ones. Her fingers tugging at his hair as she clung to him.  
  
Still kissing her, Bucky carried her toward the bedroom. He was going to show her exactly how glad he was she was home. Maybe it was the weeks of not having anyone mess with his brain. Or maybe he was on an endorphin high from her return. But he very much wanted to get his mouth and hand on other parts of her.  
  
*****  
  
Amy tangled her fingers with Bucky’s. Straddling his hips, with his erection rubbing against her slit, she couldn’t think of anywhere she would rather be. “I love you, Bucky baby.”  
  
“Love you too, baby girl.” Bucky kissed her fingertips.  
  
Steve leaned against the door. When he’d stepped over the mess of bags and laundry in the hall, he’d assumed he would find something like this. The sort of thing he dreamed about when he was having good dreams. He adjusted the front of his pants, torn between joining in and watching them. Bucky’s low moan as Amy rolled her hips decided him. Hands on was more fun. “Looks like someone could use a condom.”  
  
“We certainly could.” Amy reached towards him with her free hand. She’d wondered if he was just going to watch. Not that she would have minded. Steve’s eyes on her always added an extra thrill. It was almost was much fun as Steve touching her. Almost. She had missed him so much. “Where have you been?”  
  
“Sparing with T’Challa.” Steve leaned over the bed so she could slip her arm around his neck and press a line of kisses to her collar bone. She was home, and safe, and gloriously naked as she straddled Bucky. “I didn’t think you’d be back until morning.”  
  
“I missed you.” Amy said softly, her cheek resting on the back of his head. There was an extra masculine aura to him post sparing, pheromones that drove her crazy. It would have been enough to make her want to tear his clothes off even if she hadn’t been away.  
  
Steve purred wordlessly and nuzzled the creamy skin of her chest. He had missed her too. Her reassuring presence in the middle of the night. Her sarcastic commentary when he talked through missions with her. And this. He opened his mouth and drew in one of her perfect nipples. It had only been a week, but he had missed this.  
  
Bucky chuckled. Not that he didn’t share the love, but he’d been in the middle of something. Or maybe he was about to be in the middle of something was more accurate. “Weren’t you getting us a condom?”  
  
Steve ran his hands down Amy’s sides. “I don’t remember agreeing to that.”  
  
“I’ll get it.” Amy laughed and rocked to side to reach for her bedside table. She had a new box in the drawer.  
  
Steve pulled her into his chest before she could get very far, pushing her hair to the side so he could kiss her neck. He could get them a condom. Or he could tease the two of them until they were begging him for more. “But I’m busy.”  
  
Amy looked down at him coyly. “You’re wearing too many clothes to be busy.”  
  
“She has a point.” Bucky’s serious tone was undermined by his fingers trailing teasingly up the inside of Amy’s thigh. It wasn’t just Amy he was teasing. Steve’s eyes followed the movement too.  
  
Steve’s intentions to torment them vanished. He almost ripped his shirt in his hurry to undress. Intentions were one thing, but he never managed to hold out when it came right down to it. Individually they were an incredible temptation, together they were irresistible.  
  
Amy used the distraction of Steve trying to hop out of his pants to grab a condom and get it onto Bucky. She was glad Steve was here. She was also getting more than a little impatient.  
  
Bucky groaned as Amy sunk onto him. He slid his hand under her thigh. It was good to have her back.  
  
Steve scooped an arm across Amy’s chest. He could take her weight, take over moving her. His girl could have all of the pleasure with none of the work. Exactly what she deserved right now.  
  
Amy sighed and leaned into his hold, reaching back and running her hands over his beard. They were both acting like she might break at any second. She had given up on convincing them that she was pregnant, not made of porcelain. She didn’t mind a little coddling if it made them happy. Steve slid his other hand between her legs, stroking loving fingers over her clit. She definitely didn’t mind a little coddling.  
  
Bucky layback. There was nothing quite like teaming up with his guy to ravish their girl. He could spend the rest of his life watching Amy arch against Steve, her hands linked behind Steve’s neck, Steve’s hands all over her and his mouth on her neck. Hell, this was exactly how he planned to spend the rest of his life. He thrust up at the same time Steve rocked Amy’s down onto him. He groaned and let his eyes close. It was going to be a good life.  
  
Sparks exploded behind Amy’s eyes. Pleasure rushed through her veins like fire. Her hands tightened in Steve’s hair as she screamed. She opened her eyes, breathing hard. Bucky smirked up at her looking very satisfied with himself. She supposed he had earned a little pride in his abilities. It was tempting to kiss it off him though. If Steve wasn’t effectively holding her back... She nuzzled Steve’s shoulder, her hands sliding down his neck and arms. Maybe holding her up was a more accurate description. Her knees were absolutely weak from Bucky and Steve’s ministrations. Where had her stamina gone?  
  
Steve lifted her off Bucky and lay her down on the pillows. He was more than a little in love with how soft and affectionate she was right after her climax, the same way he was in love with Bucky’s smug smile.  
  
Amy held her arm up for Steve. Bucky had had his turn. Now it was Steve’s. She loved Steve and his bulk moving over her, his hands on either side of her head, her legs locked around his hips. He gave her part of what she wanted. Rolling over so he was braced above her. He didn’t slide inside her, even when she canted her hips towards him invitingly. He didn't even reach for a condom so he could.  
  
“You- aren’t- supposed- to- overexert- yourself.” Steve kissed her softly between each word. She was such a temptation, but someone had to be responsible. He wished like hell it wasn’t him right now.  
  
“It’s not overexerting myself.” Amy ran her hands down his torso, trailing her fingers along the sharp ridge of his Adonis lines. “It’s looking after _Mon Ours_.”  
  
Bucky nipped at her ear, curling his hand around the back of Steve’s neck at the same time. “Let me take care of our guy.”  
  
Amy slipped one arm around each of them, pulling their heads down to her. Three foreheads pressed together. Her mind still filled with a blissful post orgasmic fog. “Really? You’d do that for me?”  
  
“Anything for you, baby girl.” Bucky’s whisper was gravely with lust. Fuck Amy then Steve in quick succession. He was going to be absolutely furious if he woke up and this was a dream.  
  
“Such a gentleman.” Amy laughed, pressing herself into the mattress so Steve could roll off her and onto Bucky.  
  
“That’s our Buck, making the real sacrifices.” Steve purred, kissing down Bucky’s chest.  
  
Amy shifted up on the pillows. Watching them fool around was _almost_ as much fun as fooling around with them herself. And she doubted either of them were going to complain when she took matters into her own hands. She was reasonably sure it didn’t count as overexerting herself. She wished briefly that her vibrator wasn’t in the next room. There was no way she was leaving them long enough to get it. She would miss far too much.  
  
Bucky dragged Steve’s mouth back to his, kissing him fiercely as the other man started opened himself up. He felt more than saw Amy stretch out next to him and start touching herself. He was the luckiest guy on the planet.  
  
Warming up didn’t take Steve very long. He was getting good at knowing what his body needed to loosen up, and he was eager for more than just fingers. He knelt over Bucky and sunk slowly onto him. The best way to get used to Bucky’s girth was just to take it anyway. He closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths while he adjusted. He would never get used to just how _good_ Bucky felt.  
  
Bucky moaned as Steve started to move. Steve had definitely rushed his prep, no way he could be that tight, and be comfortable. It was more than comfortable for Bucky. It was amazing. He turned his face towards Amy, she was right there to whisper sweet nothings and encouragements into his lips. Bucky swallowed the words hungrily. Absolutely fucking amazing.  
  
Bucky wrapped his fist around Steve’s shaft, trying to stroke along with the rhythm of his thrusting. He didn’t quite succeed. That kind of coordination was hard when you were holding off blowing your load by the skin of your teeth.  
  
Steve’s hand closed over Bucky’s. Tightening his grip and speeding up the pace. His nerves buzzed and hummed. He needed more. His eyes raked over Bucky and Amy, spread beneath him. He needed them.  
  
Three sets of breathing grew harsh and ragged. Steve cupped Bucky’s face, tipping it towards him. He wanted to see into Bucky’s eyes as he finished. Bucky’s orgasm face was gorgeous, the way he bit his lip and his eyes fluttered half closed. Steve would do just about anything to get to see the face.  
  
Amy kissed Bucky behind the ear. The sweet nothings she was whispering slipping into Japanese as she got close. “ _I love you. This is all I want from the rest of my life_.”  
  
That was all it took to make Bucky lose the tenuous hold he had on his control. He groaned and arched up into Steve. The sight of Steve above him and feeling of Amy’s lips on his skin seared themselves into his mind, erasing everything else. He was more than fine with that. If he could only have one memory, this one would more than do.  
  
Bucky’s last deep thrust sent Steve spiralling over the edge of his own climax. He rocked forward, gasping as he pulled free of Bucky. He spilled across Bucky’s chest, in long gasping spurts.  
  
Amy buried her face in Bucky’s neck, smothering a long moan in his skin. All the stress and tension of the last week draining out of her, replaced by waves of calm satisfaction. She melted into the mattress breathing hard.  
  
Steve kissed first Bucky, then Amy. That was how he liked to see them, completely spent in his bed. He pulled Bucky’s condom off and knotted it off. A wet wipe off the bedside table was good enough for at least a cursory clean-up for all of them. He wasn’t sure how the garbage can had migrated to the far side if the room, but he wasn’t about to make Bucky or Amy get up. He couldn’t think of a single reason for them to be anywhere other than exactly where they were in this moment.  
  
Amy snuggled against Bucky’s side. Kisses lazy as they both floated on a tide of endorphins. She was sticky and she didn’t even care. She was back with her boys. It felt like she could fly. Bucky shifted closer to her, making space for Steve to get back into bed.  
  
Steve flopped into the space they had left open for him. There was nothing quite like having all three of them together. The heat radiating off Bucky sunk into his left side. Amy smiling at him from the other side of the bed. The world was peaceful and quiet. He was content.  
  
Late as it was, none of them wanted to sleep. They curled together in a tangle of limbs. Enjoying being together again. Amy cradled against Bucky’s metal shoulder, Steve had his arm around both of them, a nest of pillows propping them all up. Bucky’s hand found its way into Steve’s hair, combing through it absently. Steve lifted Amy’s hand and kissed her knuckles softly. “We missed you.”  
  
Amy groaned and rubbed her belly. Apparently, they weren’t the only ones who were awake. Baby was restless all of a sudden, squirming and kicking. “Apparently, baby missed you too.”  
  
Bucky pressed his hand to her belly, tiny heels drummed against his palm. It was a magical feeling. He loved their little girl so much, and he hadn’t even met her yet. “You know at some point we should think of a name for her. Can’t keep calling her ‘baby’ forever.”  
  
“She’s a Fox.” Amy said setting her hand on top of his. Not just any Fox. Strong as she was already, Amy would be very surprised if their daughter wasn’t a bright-eyed Fox like her. It meant she was probably cursed to have a more interesting life than the sweet girl’s fathers would like. “She needs a flower name.”  
  
Flower names. Bucky considered as he stroked Amy’s skin. Something sweet. Something innocent. “Daisy.”  
  
“Daisy?” Steve snorted. He couldn’t picture Amy’s daughter being named anything as common as Daisy. Daisy was cute, she wasn’t the most commanding presence in any room she walked into. People underestimated Daisy.  
  
Bucky elbowed him as best he could without letting go of Amy. Like he could come up with anything better. “Rose then.”  
  
“Sayuri.” Amy said definitively. There were only a few unique flower names left. Their little girl would need a unique name. She would be strong enough to turn her collar. They would make sure of it.  
  
“Our little water lily.” Bucky’s heart warmed. It had a certain sweet serenity to it. Something told him that Steve Rogers' child could use all the help she could get in the serenity department. “I like it.”  
  
“Sayuri Rogers.” Steve rolled the name around his mouth experimentally. “I don’t know. It doesn’t really flow.”  
  
“Kitsui Sayuri does.” Amy smiled. A beautiful name for their beautiful girl.  
  
Steve frowned. Not marrying Amy was one thing. Not recognising his daughter was another. It took two to make a baby, he was just as responsible as she was. “Yes, but—”  
  
“Steve,” She cut him off softly. Curling her finger around his and resting their clasped hands in Bucky’s lap. “You are the most wanted man on the planet. She can’t have your name.”  
  
“Can’t get married, can’t give my child my name. I hate not being able to do anything.” Steve grumbled. It wasn’t like he expected either of them to take it when they did get married, but their child was another thing. He couldn’t imagine what his Ma would say if she found out that he’d fathered a child and wasn’t claiming them, no matter the reason.  
  
“Ignore him,” Bucky shifted Amy, so she was sitting comfortably in his lap. They were doing a better job of communicating. If it was really bothering him, Steve would bring it up at a better time.  
  
“I do try to.” Amy teased, tucking her head against his neck. The details of what Steve was grumbling about could wait until after they'd all had a good nights sleep.  
  
Steve sighed and leaned against Bucky. They had to think of what would be best for the baby. For Sayuri. And that meant Amy was right, Sayuri would be safer with her Mother’s name over her father’s. It was a good name. She would do well in life with or without her fathers. He pressed his palm to Amy’s stomach. “Kitsui Sayuri. I can only hope you aren’t as stubborn as your mother.”  
  
Bucky twisted to kiss Steve’s cheek. If that wasn’t the pot calling the kettle black. “You’d rather she turns out hard-headed like her father?”  
  
“There’s always the chance she could learn to be like you.” Steve teased back.  
  
Amy nestled her head into Bucky’s neck. Now there was a thought. Steve wasn’t exactly the only one of her boys that was a magnet for trouble. “Thank the gods there’s three of us. She’s going to be more than a handful.”  
  
Bucky laughed and closed his eye. The three of them could handle anything, but their baby girl was sure to be their biggest challenge.


	74. Labour of Love

Steve’s eyes wandered away from his screen, too the two people curled together on the couch, the man he loved and the woman bearing his child. Tangled together with a book. They looked so peaceful, so perfect, with Bucky stroking Amy’s belly while she turned the pages of the book they were reading.  
  
He had them to himself for two more days. Then Amy would disappear for an indefinite period of time. Disappear to do something inherently dangerous. His mother had been a nurse. he knew how many women died in child bed. How many babies. And Amy was going to be on a different continent. He would be completely helpless if anything happened to her. At least if she was here….  
  
“No.” Amy spoke without looking up from the book. “I am going home to Japan to have her and that is final.”  
  
Steve’s knee bounced as an outlet for his anxious energy. He didn’t want this to turn into another screaming fight, for Bucky’s sake as much as for hers. But he also couldn’t let her leave without at least trying. “You have to admit that the medical facilities here are world class.”  
  
Amy tucked a bookmark between the pages she was reading. If he wanted to talk about medical facilities, she was happy to oblige. Not that she would be changing her mind about her birth plan, there were other considerations involved in that. “Actually, that’s something I think we need to talk about. Not for me and Sayuri. For Bucky.”  
  
“What about me?” Bucky asked, sitting back. It had to be about his surgery, he just didn’t see the connection to Steve thinking she should stay here.  
  
Amy shifted so she was sideways in Bucky’s lap and facing Steve. His arm automatically moved to circle her shoulders, and she reached up to link her fingers through his. She’d been thinking about this a lot, but it wasn’t something she could decide on her own. “I think doing your surgery in Wakanda would be a mistake. I trust the surgical team I have assembled, but the fewer people know your exact location the better. People let things slip. I also believe our hosts would prefer to limit the number of outsiders invited in.”  
  
“What’s the other option?” Steve asked rocking back in his seat. She had a point. T’Challa had done a lot for them, but the surgical team was a lot for him to have to justify to his chiefs, especially if there was a way they could pull it off without involving the country that had so generously offered them sanctuary.  
  
“There are a couple. Break into an old soviet instillation, although I think the flaws in that plan are obvious. We can buy out a floor of Mount Elizabeth Hospital in Singapore. I can do that without any paper trail that leads back to me but avoiding all contact with civilians would be difficult.” Amy hesitated. “Or, we can use the surgical theatre in Katsura…”  
  
Bucky’s arm tightened around her convulsively. Amy’s home? He didn’t see any way to pull that off without it tying back to her. He’d rather skip the entire thing than put her in danger. The image of a livid bruise discolouring her face swam into his mind. Maybe not skip it entirely, but he still didn’t like the risk to her security.  
  
Steve moved from the desk to the armchair across from them. Bucky obviously didn’t like the idea, but Steve didn’t think Amy would suggest it if she hadn’t thought it through. “Walk us through the plan.”  
  
“I’m going to be in Kyoto for a month after the birth. At the end of that month I will be taking Sayuri to Fushimi Inari shrine for her _Omiyamairi._ ” Amy smoothed her hand over her stomach. Sayuri’s introduction to the gods was an important day for her. She would need them to know her if she was going to grow up to be one. They could also use the pageantry to help her father. “It would be appropriate for a member to the Wakandan royal family to attend. It would be even more appropriate for my sister in law to join me and spend a week getting to know her first nice.”  
  
Steve nodded following so far. Shuri would be the obvious choice, she was the most outgoing of the royals. It wouldn’t be hard for Steve and Bucky to join her on the plane. The airstrip at Katsura was more than private, they didn’t need to worry about surveillance as long as they stayed on the grounds. “What about the other surgeon? Range or whatever his name is?”  
  
“He can travel without anyone tracking him.” She hoped he wouldn’t press the issue. Explaining exactly how Strange would avoid being tracked was a more involved prospect than she was prepared for right now.  
  
Steve spent another twenty minutes, grilling Ayame on the details of both plans. She had an answer for every flaw and contingency he could think of. The more he picked them apart, the clearer it was that the two plans weren’t created equal. It wasn’t that Singapore was a _bad_ option exactly, but Katsura was more secure, the facilities were similar, the timeline was tighter, there were fewer weakness in the transportation plans.  
  
Eventually, Steve ran out of questions. He leaned back in his chair, tapping his fingers against his knee. Amy’s face was perfectly smooth, not giving away any hint of her personal preference. Steve didn’t need visual cues to know where she landed. She wouldn’t have even suggested Katsura if she didn’t think it was the best option. “It has to be your decision, Buck.”  
  
“But you agree with her.” Bucky studied Steve’s face. Amy obviously favoured Japan, Steve agreed, there was just one reservation holding him back from agreeing himself. He pressed his face into Amy’s neck. “Promise this won’t put you in danger?”  
  
Amy shifted so he was cradled against her chest. It wasn’t quite that simple. Any time she spent with her boys was a point of vulnerability. Even here there was always the off chance of someone from the UN paying a surprise visit and discovering their refuge. That risk was slightly higher at home in Japan. “I promise I will be as safe with you in Katsura for a week as I am here.”  
  
Bucky sighed and sat back up. He didn’t want to put either of them at risk. And the best way to do that was to get his brain straight. “Okay. Set it up.”  
  
*****  
  
A soft breeze ruffled the trees around the landing pad. Steve anxiously trailed Shuri around a jet as she did prefight checks. She kept reassuring him that flying it remotely was just as safe as being on the plane herself, but he hated the idea of Amy being alone in a little tube for five hours. Even one with a plush couch. You weren’t supposed to fly after 36 weeks for a reason. Amy had met all of his concerns with calm reasoned counter arguments. Steve accepted all her points, but he still wanted to do everything he could to keep his family safe.  
  
The last month had passed faster than it should have. Bucky had been sure he would be ready for Amy’s departure when the day finally came. Now it was here, and he was dreading it. Bucky slid his hand down the inside of Amy’s arm. “Are you sure you have to go.”  
  
Amy slipped her hand into his. She’d take them with her if she could. It was just too risky. “I’m sure.”  
  
“’S just that Steve will get all mopey.” Bucky turned towards her, resting his cheek against her hair. He would miss the sweet smoke and flowers smell that always hung around her. “He’ll be all clingy and have nightmares.”  
  
“ _Steve_ has gone a month without seeing me before.” Amy cuddled into his chest, making herself small so he could wrap around her protectively. “It will be fine, _Mon Loup_. I will be safe, and you will be too busy with the farm to notice that I’m missing.”  
  
“Plane’s ready.” Steve whispered, touching the small of Bucky’s back. He didn’t want to interrupt their goodbye, but Amy should get going if she was going to make it to Japan at a reasonable time of day. He didn’t want her staying up all night and going into this next week over tired. Nothing was going to go wrong, but he wanted her well rested just in case. He hoped to god it was only a week. Any longer and he would start to go crazy.  
  
Amy reached up to cup Bucky’s cheek. “I’ll call. As soon as I land, and then everyday after. A month isn’t that long in the grand scheme of things.”  
  
“That’s true. We’ve got the rest of our lives.” Steve curled a hand around Amy’s neck and tugged her into a hug of his own. “Still going to be counting the hours, sweetheart.”  
  
Amy shifted them, so she had a head on each shoulder. How was she supposed to sleep without her boys around her? She’d come a long way from not being able to sleep around anyone. Although, her boys weren’t just anyone. “I love you.”  
  
They took turns exchanging one last long kiss each, and Amy boarded the plane.  
  
Bucky wrapped his arm possessively around Steve’s waist as the jet soared away. He wasn’t sure what he was going to do when Steve had to leave for work too. Sleep down at the farm and worry into himself into a depression, probably.  
  
*****  
  
Sunlight filtered through thin paper window coverings. Amy knelt in the middle of the room, heels together, knees apart. She kept her spine perfectly straight, face expressionless. She closed her eyes and took a slow breath. The smell of incense and tatami were reassuring. They were the smells of her childhood. How many times had she visited her Grandmother in her castle? At least twice a year for the first decade of her life. She could run the top of the surrounding wall blindfolded, she had in fact, as a part of her training. As familiar as she was with the castle as a whole, she had next to no memories of this room. It was the same room where a hundred Foxes had been born, almost every bright-eyed Fox for 1000 years.  
  
Amy smoothed her hand over the cotton robe covering her belly. The pains had started. It wouldn’t be long before the room welcomed one more Fox. “Come on, kit. The sooner you’re out, the sooner we can get back to your fathers.”  
  
“Do you want me to call them?” Dai asked, rubbing little circles on the small of her back. He and Amy were alone, at least for now. There was no reason not to check in on them. It would take one worry off her plate and maybe they could help her relax.  
  
Amy rolled her shoulders, she was tensing up during contractions, that was only going to lead to more discomfort later. She could use a distraction. “Please.”  
  
Dai pulled out Amy’s phone. He knew she had done video calls with Rogers and Barnes the last three days, usually over her breakfast. Voice only sounded like a better plan to Dai just at the moment. The last thing they needed was a pair of genetically engineered super soldiers getting worked up because Amy was in pain and couldn’t quite keep it out of her expression. Dai placed the call, turning on speaker phone and setting the setting the phone on Amy’s knee while it connected.  
  
Steve answered on the second ring. “Sweetheart?”  
  
“Hi, _Mon Ours_.” She’d only been gone a couple of days, but she already missed them. Just hearing Steve’s voice lightened her heart.  
  
“Are you alright?” Steve asked in a low worried voice.  
  
“She’s in labour.” Dai snorted and picked up a leaf shaped fan. Sayuri could have picked a cooler time to arrive. The early August heat wasn’t helping. Ayame always did better with the cold than with being too warm.  
  
“I’ve been worse.” Amy reassured him. She rubbed her lower back. It felt like her bones were grating against each other. Which she supposed they were. It would have been nice to have Steve here. His big warm hands would be able to rub the discomfort away.  
  
“Hang on, let me grab Buck.” The sound of Steve setting down his phone was followed by the scrape of a chair and a bang of a door being thrown open.  
  
“I’ll give you a few minutes.” Dai squeezed her around the shoulders in a half hug. He could check on the rest of the preparations while they talked. He pressed the fan into her hand. “Try to relax and stay cool.”  
  
Amy tapped her knuckles against his. She missed her boys, but there was no one she’d rather have with her right now.  
  
The door banged again. Two sets of feet jogged across a hard floor.  
  
“Baby girl!” Bucky sounded even more frantic than Steve had.  
  
Amy smiled. Poor worried boys. She understood their concerns. It would be worth it in the end. “Hi, Bucky baby.”  
  
“What do you need, baby girl? What can we do?” She could hear the way they had huddled around the phone. Crowding into one another, trying to be physically close to one another and to the phone.  
  
There wasn’t all that much they could do from where they were. Amy fanned herself as she considered. They needed a distraction almost as much as she did. “Tell me a story.”  
  
*****  
  
“A story?” Bucky looked at Steve. A story. Something to keep her mind busy and distract her from pain. They could do that. They had stories. Why couldn’t he remember any of their stories?  
  
Steve slipped an arm around Bucky’s waist, pulling him half into his lap where they sat on the couch. “Buck ever tell you about the time he got caught sneaking out of the Griffith Hotel for Women?”  
  
“I don’t think it ever came up.” Amy said, a little too calmly.  
  
Steve hated the edge of discomfort that coloured Amy’s voice. But that was exactly why they were telling her this story. “Summer of 39, Bucky met this girl. Katherine, I think her name was. Katy, with the big green eyes. She was beautiful, she was intelligent, she thought Bucky was adorable. And she lived in this ungodly boarding house in midtown Manhattan.”  
  
Bucky frowned. “Midtown?” Steve and Bucky had shared an apartment in Brooklyn back in the day. It might as well have been the other side of planet back then.  
  
“You met her at a church dance. You didn’t even like her that much. She was just interesting enough for you to be willing to take a train for a couple of times.” Steve kissed Bucky’s temple. Bucky hadn’t liked any of the girls he had courted back then all that much. He’d never fixed on one the way he fixed on Amy. Steve thought he understood why now. None of them had been _him_. Bucky had been trying to find someone he thought he could tolerate living with for 40 years, or someone to distract him for a night or two, not someone he was actually in love with. What they had now was better. Stranger, with the three of them all juggling each other, but it seemed to be working, it was definitely better.  
  
Bucky nodded thoughtfully and shifted closer to Steve. This story was distracting him just as much as it was Amy. He didn’t remember it, but he wasn’t sure he would have remembered it all that clearly in 45 either. All the people he had dated sort of blended together. None of them were the people he loved. It felt good to know that Steve had been paying attention.  
  
“Buck calls one night. There was only one phone in the building, Mrs. McKinny had to run up three flights of stairs to get me. I’d been minding my own business, trying to finish a project for school.” Steve shook Bucky affectionately. “But Mrs. McKinny said Buck was on the phone and it sounded like he was in trouble.”  
  
Bucky leaned against Steve’s side as he launched into the full story. He liked listening to Steve tell stories about their past. Most of what he remembered from the years right before the war was more feelings than actual concrete memories. This was a particularly fun anecdote. He didn’t remember sneaking into a dumb waiter. Or being chased out the front door holding his shoes but no pants. He could perfectly picture a disappointed Steve showing up in the middle of the night with a new pair of pants and a lecture on how he was a feckless jerk, although it was hard to say if that was a real memory of just something his brain had invented because it felt right.  
  
Steve leaned back into the couch. They had been standing on the sidewalk, with Bucky trying to comfort a crying Katy, when Steve had realised that Bucky didn’t actually love her. Bucky had done everything he could to make her feel better, but it had been perfunctory. He’d been going through the motions because he thought he had to, not because he wanted to. The day Steve had realised he was going to miss next months rent, was the same day Bucky had shown up at his apartment with a car and a determination that Steve was moving in with him until they graduated. Bucky would help pretty much anyone he could, because he was a good person, but he would move mountains for the people he really cared about. “We ended up taking Katy and everything she owned home with us on the train. Couldn’t leave the poor girl standing on the street corner after all.”  
  
“I remember that.” Bucky said, the pieces finally clicking into place. “I slept on the couch for a week while she found another place to live.”  
  
Amy actually laughed at that. A knot loosened in Steve’s stomach. She had to be doing alright if she could laugh. He closed his eyes and pressed his forehead into Bucky’s temple. He wished so much that he was right there with her. That he could confirm that she was alright through more than just tone of voice. For now, all he could do was keep her laughing. For that he needed another story.  
  
Bucky rubbed away the worried crease between Steve’s eyes. Amy would be alright, because she had to be alright. She needed them to distract her, they could manage that. “What about Steve’s fight with Conner Fadden? You ever hear that one?”  
  
*****  
  
The biggest contraction yet hit Amy, jerking her out of her immersion in Bucky and Steve’s story. It felt different from the others. Things were shifting.  
  
“I think my dears, that it is time for me to go.” Amy said as lightly as she could. The pressure was starting to feel overwhelming. Her body was telling her to push.  
  
“Amy…” Steve’s voice was a plaintive whisper, filled with a thousand things he didn’t have words for.  
  
“I know. I love you too.” Amy took a long slow breath through the discomfort. “I’ll call tomorrow.”  
  
Amy refused to let herself make noise as Steve and Bucky gushed their affectionate goodbyes. She loved them, but she was working to someone else’s timeline at the moment and she didn’t want them to panic as things got more intense.  
  
Dai slid the door open. He hadn’t wanted to intrude, but the wood floor of the balcony was hard on his knees. “How are they?”  
  
“They worry.” Amy smiled through gritted teeth. “I think it is time to call in the peanut gallery.”  
  
Dai leapt into action, tidying away the papers she had been trying to ready earlier, tucking her phone back into her bag, shoving her bag and slippers into a cupboard so the room was empty except for a single futon and a handful of pillows scattered in a loose semi-circle. He ducked his head out the door and called to Amy’s mother Rina who was waiting patiently at the head of the stairs.  
  
“Don’t scream.” Dai murmured, as he took his place supporting her left side.  
  
“I’m not going to scream.” Amy said, voice perfectly level. It was a matter of pride. Making it through this without showing pain would show not only her strength and dignity, but the strength of her child. Her child was strong. Steve and Bucky’s child was strong. She wouldn’t disgrace that strength by breaking now. She squeezed Dai’s hand. And she had strong people supporting her.  
  
The room filled up. Amy mother took her right hand, balancing Dai on her left. Kiki knelt just behind Dai with a fresh damp cloth. The Aunts filled in, taking up positions around the perimeter. The last to enter was her Grandmother. She claimed pride of place, sinking onto the pillow opposite Amy. The silk of her kimono pooling liquidly around her.  
  
*****  
  
Bucky stared around the room of half unpack baby furniture. They should finish setting up. She still needed a changing table, and a dresser. They hadn’t even put any of the furniture together yet. Steve had finished painting the walls at least. The soft lavender-blue was soothing. Everything else was a jumbled pile of bags and half opened boxes. A pile of empty frames waited in the corner, topped with a selection of drawings Steve had done specifically for the nursery. Cartoon animals, a sketch of daddy in his blue jacket and papa with shiny shield, mommy dancing, cartoon versions of Auntie Nat and Uncle Dai smiling, Uncle Sam with his wings.  
  
Bucky picked up the stuffed dragon sitting at the top of a bag. It was cute. Not as cute as the Bucky bear Steve had so proudly presented him with when they first stashed all the baby stuff in the spare bedroom, but cute. He rummaged through the rest of the bag. It was full of soft goods, swaddling blankets, cloth diapers, baby clothes. Something about the baby clothes made Bucky’s chest feel tight, the tiny socks, the little leggings. Bucky sunk to the floor, a onesie in his hand. _Daddy’s Little Princess_. The swirling pink letters sparkled with glitter. It was so small. He spread the scrap of fabric over his knee. The person that would fit it would be so vulnerable. Such a fragile little bundle of life.  
  
Steve wandered listless through the suite. Their rooms felt empty without Amy. It was strange, she was so quiet most of the time. She hadn’t even been gone that long, three days since she had left, and she was already in labour. Might even be done by now for all he knew. How long did that sort of thing take anyway? It was her future absence that hung over Steve and the space like a heavy fog.  
  
He stopped when he found Bucky sitting in the middle of what was going to be the nursery, looking despondent and lost. He sunk to the floor next to his guy and wrapped an arm around Bucky’s shoulders. “What’s got you thinking so hard, Buck.”  
  
“If she’s not—” Bucky spread his hand over the onesie, he could almost cover the entire thing. Their entire future represented by something barely bigger than his hand. “If I was wrong and we should have asked her before…” Bucky traced the word princess. Ayame was amazing, but she was still human. She could still be hurt. He had seen that with his own eyes. Hell, he’d been the one to hurt her on a number of occasions. She defied the odds most of the time. What if this wasn’t one of those times? What if the empty little onesie was all the future they ever had? “Women die, Stevie.”  
  
Steve couldn’t pretend that fear hadn’t been on his mind as well. He had worked hard to stop it from taking hold. Nothing had ever stopped Amy from coming back to him before, not even death. It wouldn’t come to that this time. Everything was going to be fine. “Not anymore. Modern medicine can work miracles, Buck. And Japan is one of the most advanced countries in the world.”  
  
Bucky sighed and rocked to his feet. Maybe doing something productive would help keep his mind off it. “Help me set up this damn dresser.”  
  
Conversation was kept to a minimum as they assembled furniture and arranged all the baby paraphernalia. Pictures went into frames and got hung on the wall. Bucky caught Steve stashing some of the early life things in a gear bag to take with them when they went to her at the end of the month.  
  
He added the _Daddy’s Little Princess_ onesie to the bag. Steve had to be right. Their future had to go the way they had planned. Bucky didn’t even know what their future looked like without Amy. She was the reason they had a home in Wakanda. The surgery that was supposed to make him safe was impossible without her. And there was no way her family would let him and Steve take custody of Sayuri if the worst happened. Not that Bucky blamed them for that. Their baby girl would be worlds safer with the Daisuki and the Winters family, than she would be with her fathers.  
  
Steve wrapped his arms around Bucky from behind. His guy was still worrying. “Do you want to sleep down at the farm tonight?”  
  
“Yeah, maybe.” Bucky answered noncommittally. On the one hand, he always found the farm relaxing, and the narrow cot bed forced him and Steve to sleep practically on top of one another. On the other, the bed down at the farm was missing the ghost of Amy that still permeated the pillows here… and the narrow cot bed forced him and Steve to sleep practically on top of one another.  
  
*****  
  
Three hours later, Amy was weak from her efforts, and her Grandmother proudly held a squalling infant. Sayuri had been washed and swaddled in pale pink silk. Eight silver haired women cooed proudly over the baby. Rina beamed at her newest grandchild from the edge of the circle. Amy propped herself on an elbow, trying to get a look at her daughter. Sayuri had been whisked away so fast, and Amy had been so preoccupied with third stage labour, that she hadn’t had a chance to do more than confirm her daughter was alive. From the strength of her cries, Amy had no reason to doubt she was very alive. It was the other less important questions that burned in her brain now. “Is she?”  
  
“Ten fingers, ten toes, eyes even brighter than yours.” Dai assured her helping her to her change her robe for a clean one and settling her onto the waiting futon.  
  
Amy let herself melt with relief. She would have loved her daughter even if she had lacked powers, but with parents like hers she needed every advantage. She would inherit enemies from all sides, and in all likelihood, take after her father and never meet a fight she didn’t love. Something that, if Ayame was being honest with herself, Sayuri’s mother was guilty of herself. Bucky was the one who preferred conflict avoidance, and he’d been denied that choice. Either way, Sayuri was destined to face adversity.  
  
“She is perfect.” Grandmother handed the infant to Amy’s mother. “A beautiful, bright-eyed, golden Fox. I look forward to seeing what she can accomplish.”  
  
Dai propped a rolled futon behind Amy, nudging her shoulder to get her to relax back into it. Ayame’s Grandmother and the Aunts drifted from the room. Sakura pausing long enough to kiss the top of Amy’s head and whisper a private congratulations of her own.  
  
“I think the little one is ready for her first meal.” Rina said, kneeling next to her daughter. Sayuri cradled against her shoulder, still bawling miserably.  
  
Amy held out her arms. Her mother gently settled the baby in the crook of her arm, arranging her for a feeding. Warmth and love washed over her. Lilly made tiny mewing noises as she nursed. Amy traced her perfect cheek. “Hello, little kit. You are so loved.”  
  
“You should think about eating something yourself,” Rina gently wiped her daughter’s forehead, smoothing back the strands of pale hair plastered to her skin. “If you’re feeling strong enough.”  
  
“Let’s start with just a smoothie.” Amy closed her eyes and leaned back into the soft embrace of the futon. Sayuri had latched on firmly and was feeding peacefully. It looked like the experience hadn’t worn her out the way it had her mother. Hopefully once she had eaten her fill, she would fall asleep, then Amy could take a nap of her own.


	75. Hello, Baby Girl

Bucky was practically vibrating in his seat as their plane landed. It was a combination of things. Nerves about his surgery, excitement at seeing his girls, general anxieties about being in ‘public’ for the first time in a year, muscle memory reminding him that basically every time he’d ever been on a plane it was followed by a fight. There was no fight at the end of this trip. Just Amy and Sayuri and the surgery that would make it safe for him to be around them.  
  
Steve rubbed Bucky’s knee. He was anxious to get to the ground too. A month was a long time to have Amy and their child on the other side of the world. There had been daily calls and video chats, but they weren’t the same. He wanted to fall asleep with Amy in his bed and he wanted to finally actually meet his daughter. He looked at the man he loved, still anxiously staring out the window. By the end of the week, Bucky would be free of the implant that kept wiping his brain. They were so close to the rest of their lives.  
  
Shuri banked the jet into the Katsura landing strip with practiced ease. Steve had to remind himself that this wasn’t actually the first time she had made this trip. She had flown Amy in remotely, but given her technology, it wasn’t actually all that different.  
  
Samurai met them at the foot of the ramp, Yuma just behind him. “Welcome to the Royal Residence at Katsura. Good to have you back, Captain Rogers.”  
  
Bucky scanned the airstrip and the rest of the visible. There was no sign of Amy. He could see a secure perimeter ringing the compound. None of the patrolling guards seemed to care about him or Steve, which was reassuring, but he wanted to see his girl. He wasn’t about to feel secure until he had his eyes on Amy. Shuri bounced down the ramp grinning and looking around curiously. Bucky moved a little closer to her, protectively. Steve recognised these people, but that wasn’t a guarantee of anything these days. Amy could have been waylaid and they could be here to arrest them.  
  
“Good to be back, Taiki.” Steve clasped the offered hand warmly. “May I introduce Princess Shuri of Wakanda?”  
  
“Your highness.” Samurai bowed respectfully. Revealing the crest on the back of his jacket. A white iris inside a white ring. Amy’s crest. The same one that was stamped on all her care packages. “Yuma will show you to your rooms.”  
  
Yuma shifted and Bucky saw the crest dyed onto the shoulders of her kimono as well. Bucky relaxed. They wouldn’t be wearing Amy’s crest if they weren’t following her orders. Little Fox had a reputation, and it wasn’t a particularly forgiving one.  
  
Yuma bowed even deeper than Samurai had. “An honour, princess. If you’ll follow me. You’ll be staying at the big house, I thought we would drop off your luggage before a quick tour of the facilities, and then the commander has invited you to the Fox Pavilion for dinner.”  
  
Shuri followed Yuma, already asking questions about the medical facilities and the plans for the surgery. Questions that Yuma seemed to have answers to.  
  
“Where is she?” Bucky muttered, taking another look around. Reassuring as it was to know these people worked for Amy, she should be here. There was no sign of her though, just professionals on guard duty and the highly collected ‘Taiki’.  
  
Samurai let out a barking laugh. “You’re two hours early. Where do you think Vixen is?”  
  
Steve threw one arm around Bucky’s shoulders. He knew exactly where she would be. “Come on. You’ll like this.”  
  
*****  
  
Balanced on top of a three-foot cube, Amy held her naginata blade down at her side. Just a practice weapon today, a white oak staff with a carved and weighted wooden blade. She had practice swords on her hip too, although she would only need them if she was somehow disarmed. Around her eight members of the Fox clan weighed their weapons in preparation for an attack. Including Demon from her own team. Further out, a class of senior students ringed the practice field. All she had to do was hold her position. All they had to do was make her touch the ground. They might be able to manage it too. She was a little out of practice. Being heavily pregnant or immediately postpartum both precluded the kind of intense combat training Amy favoured. She’d only really started getting back in condition two weeks ago. If felt good exercise her long dormant skills. She tapped the tip of her practice blade against the side of the box, as she waited for her sparing partners to work up the courage to attack.  
  
Steve recognised one of the flock of students surrounding the field as a very grown up looking Hakari, bouncing a little on the balls of her feet. He gave the girl a little wink. It was good to see that her misadventure hadn’t dimmed her spirits too much. From the looks of it her ankle had even healed cleanly. She grinned and waved back.  
  
At that moment, Amy’s first two opponents launched themselves at her from opposite sides. Ayame fended them off easily, a sweeping slash at the woman on the right, a jab to the collar bone with the butt for the man on the left.  
  
Bucky swallowed. Steve was right. He liked this. He liked this a lot. He moved half a step closer to Steve. He didn’t even have to worry about her, this was only practice. For all she was fighting like a wild thing, she was perfectly safe. For the next fifteen minutes he found himself hardly able to blink he watched Amy fight off wave after wave of attackers.  
  
As time wore on, her opponents grew bolder. Amy found herself unable to counter when four of them rushed her from one side, at the same time Demon went low on the other side, not aiming for Amy, but for the box. The combination knocked the box off level and rolling it to the side, leaving Amy without a firm footing. She tuck-jumped, used one of her attackers’ shoulders as a steppingstone, and landed back on the newly exposed side of her block. The landing only lasted for a second, before she planted the butt of her naginata and kicked into the chest of another man with both feet. He stumbled back, knocking in to two of his allies and sending all three of them tumbling to the ground.  
  
On the side lines Steve grinned and leaned against the fence. That was his girl. Fierce and undefeated. The movement drew Amy’s eyes to him. He winked at her. She tipped her head at him in surprise, not so much as breaking her rhythm as she repelled another wave of attackers.  
  
Amy barked a command and her sparing partners scattered. Her audience followed, falling into step behind Demon as he started moving and lecturing on what Amy had done to secure her victory. Only once they were all clear of the ring did Amy step down from her box.  
  
Amy vaulted the fence, practice weapons discarded as she went. “You’re early.”  
  
Steve caught her by the waist and spun her around. It felt so comfortably familiar, like slipping into a hot bath. Which was something else they needed to do while they were here. He kissed her long and slow, inordinately pleased when she pressed up into him. A month was too long to go without kissing her. She was soft, where Bucky and his beard were rough. They weren’t going to that long between kisses again. Not if he had anything to say about it. “Bucky couldn’t wait to see you.”  
  
“Is that true, baby?” Amy draped her arms around Bucky’s neck. “Did you miss me?”  
  
“Absolutely lost without you.” Bucky purred, curling his hand around the back of her belt, and pulling her even closer. He could feel her heartbeat, it was just a little fast. An increased rate he could attribute almost entirely to her kiss with Steve. He’d forgotten how much he loved watching her fight. She could be even more of a predator than he was. Those smooth movements. The way her weapon was an extension of herself. He rubbed his nose along hers. The way she could be sweet with them and fierce with the rest of the world gave him hope for himself.  
  
Amy melted into the kiss. She had missed them so much. Being home had been amazing, but there was nothing like being in her boys’ arms. A long workout followed by letting them carry her off to bed sounded like a perfect day.  
  
Steve smiled and touched Amy’s back, just above where Bucky was holding her. He’d missed her too. “Not that I want break this up, but there was actually someone else I was hoping to meet today.”  
  
Amy slipped her hand into Steve’s, keeping her arm around Bucky as she did. “Dai’s got her back at the Fox pavilion. Come on. Let’s go see your baby.”  
  
Bucky was almost too excited to notice their stunning surroundings as Amy lead them through the grounds. Curving paths lead through lush dense foliage. The paranoid part of Bucky’s mind noticed that the stone statues were strategically placed to create bottle necks. The steppingstones rendered the footing treacherous, at least for people who hadn’t trained to defend precautious perches like he had just seen Amy do. He spotted a path cut into the trees too, a camouflaged way to move across the grounds unhindered. He found it reassuring to know that his girl’s home was at the heart of somewhere so defensible. The pavilion itself didn’t disappoint him either, the raised veranda that ran around the outside would let anyone fighting from inside the building strike down instead of up.  
  
It was a good place to house his girls. He couldn’t have designed somewhere so peaceful and secure at the same time if he had tried.  
  
*****  
  
Amy knelt at the door across from her bedroom and slid open the door. Dai had been downstairs in the office, listening to Sayuri nap over the baby monitor. He’d made his excuses and rushed off to meet Fredrick’s train, leaving just the three of them for this introduction.  
  
It wasn’t a room Steve had spent a lot of time in on his previous visits. He was nearly positive it had been redecorated since the last time he had seen it. Now the space was a peaceful nursery. A rocking chair, a small fridge, a large inflatable ball, a pile of soft toys and books, a dresser come change table. Taking pride of place in the middle of the room, sat a bassinet made out of pale wood and creamy fabric. Ōjo slept soundly on a pillow by the window, ears twitching in a cat dream. It was light and cosy at the same time.  
  
Nestled in the bassinet, swaddled in dark blue and white muslin, slept the reason they were here. Steve took Bucky’s hand and crept closer, their footsteps muffled by the tatami mats.  
  
Bucky looked down at the sleeping bundle. Tiny scrunched nose, little chubby cheeks, and a little wrinkle between her eyebrows, giving her a concerned look, even as she snored softly. “God, Steve. She looks just like you.”  
  
Steve stepped closer, brushing his fingertips over Lilly’s curls, soft golden ringlets. She’d been beautiful in their video chats. In real life she was so much more. “She’s so small.”  
  
Bucky rested his head on Steve’s shoulder. This was a perfect moment. He had thought _Ryzhiy_ asleep was the purest thing he had ever seen. But even when he had managed to spirit her away to the woods for a night, there had always been the shadow of having to take her back to people who wanted to use her. Sayuri didn’t have that. And Bucky would give his life to make sure she never did.  
  
Lilly blinked open heavy eyes.  
  
Bucky gasped. Asleep she looked like Steve. But those eyes belonged to her mother. Huge, bright purple, almonds rimmed with long golden lashes. Bucky tucked her swaddling blanket back from her face more securely. “Hello beautiful.”  
  
Lilly yawed and made a tiny sleepy noise. One hand struggling free of her wrappings, pink fist bumping against her cheek.  
  
Steve felt his heart melt. Nothing had ever felt as important as this moment. This was what he was saving the world for. She was tiny, fragile, and so full of potential. He touched one of her curls. “Can I hold her?”  
  
“Of course.” Amy helped him arrange his hands, so he was supporting her head properly. Lilly yawned again, wiggled slightly to get comfortable and drifted off again. Bucky crowded in against Steve’s side, soaking in the sight of his guy holding their little girl. Amy kissed Sayuri’s head. Now that was where her baby belonged. Safe and content with her fathers beaming at her like she hung the stars.  
  
Steve sunk into the room’s chair, unable to take his eyes off his little girl. It was hard to believe something so perfect could have anything to do with him.  
  
Amy draped a burp cloth over Bucky’s shoulder and kissed his cheek. “I’m going to grab a shower. Think you can handle watching her sleep for about twenty minuets?”  
  
“Just try and stop us.” Bucky perched on the arm of the chair. Twenty-minuets wasn’t nearly long enough. He wrapped his arm around Steve’s shoulders and pulled in against his side. He was pretty sure he could sit like this for hours. Watching Sayuri sleep, watching Steve watch her sleep. He was so full of love right now, he had to be glowing.  
  
*****  
  
Sayuri woke up well before Amy it back from her shower. Barely ten minuets later she opened her eyes again. This time the was no adorable yawning and going back to sleep. This time their little girl demonstrated exactly how loud she could be. How such a small person could produce so much sound was beyond Steve. He bounced and shushed her, pacing around the room. He was glad she didn’t have his pre serum lungs, but he wouldn’t mind if she would put them to a less heart-breaking use. Most of his experience with babies consisted of someone thrusting one into his arms, a flash bulb going off, and the baby being whisked away. None of the books had prepared him for the reality. A quick diaper check had confirmed that that wasn’t the problem. Steve would have figured it out if it had been, he’d figured out how to undo her swaddling to do the check in the first place. As it stood, he and Bucky agreed she had to be hungry, but they were working largely on instinct. They would give her anything she needed, but unlike Amy they needed a little time to get her meal ready.  
  
Bucky found a bottle in the little fridge and popped it into the waiting warmer. He had spent most of the last month reading the instruction manuals for all the things Amy had bought. He could handle this part. At least he’d better be able to. Their little girl needed him to be able to. It took some fiddling to check the temperature one handed, but Bucky eventually managed it.  
Bucky sat with his back against the wall, knees up in front of him. He held his arm out towards Steve. “Give her here.”  
  
Steve lay Sayuri in Bucky’s lap, her head resting against his knees. Bucky offered her the bottle the way the books had all instructed. She latched as soon as the nipple brushed her lips, suckling like she was starving. Steve was sure that wasn’t true. He would be very surprised if she hadn’t been fed just before Amy left for her workout and he didn’t see Dai letting her starve if she had woken up between then and now.  
  
Either way, she made quick work of the liquid in the bottle. Her eyes closed, distress transforming into contentment almost instantly. Steve’s heart melted all over again at the soft little grunts and whimpers she made as she sucked.  
  
Bottle empty, she released the rubber teat and smacked her little pink lips together. Bucky passed Steve the bottle and wiped away a stray drip away from her chin. She blinked at him, awake and happy about it now that she was full.  
  
“ _Kon'nichiwaakachan._ *” Bucky whispered at her. He thought she liked that, at least her hands waved a little faster and her eyes seemed to focus more firmly on his face. His Japanese was a little rusty, but he could dust it off for his little girl.  
  
Sayuri’s hand just fit between Bucky’s thumb and index finger. He wiggled it playfully, marvelling at her tiny fingers and chubby arms. Everything about her was just so _little._ “She’s smiling at me.”  
  
Steve dropped the empty bottle in a basket with a few others waiting to be washed. “It’s probably gas, Buck. Babies don’t start deliberately smiling until around two months.”  
  
“So? Our girl’s smart, I bet she’ll be ahead on all those milestones.” Bucky jiggled his knees and Lilly spit up a little. He wiped away the guck with the corner of a burp cloth. It was just possible that Steve had been right about the gas. He was still convinced that his little girl was a genius.  
  
Sayuri wiggled and waved her little fists at him. Big eyes locked on his face. Now that he was looking at them up close, Bucky could see that they were a lighter shade of purple than her mother’s. More lavender than violet. Bucky leaned forward and kissed Sayuri’s forehead. Maybe it hadn’t been a real smile, but she was still such a happy baby.  
  
“You fed her?” Amy wafted back into the room, piling damp hair into a loose bun on the top of her head. She had changed out of her gi, and into a shin-length skirt made of dove grey brushed cotton and a pleated black crop top with a deep V neckline. The shirt was easy to nurse in, and she thought Bucky would enjoy the way it closed with a single bow on the side when he tried to take it off her later. He always loved when her clothes were easy to manage one handed.  
  
“Yeah.” Bucky smiled up at her. Fed her, burped her, generally adored her. All the things a father should do.  
  
Steve wrapped his arms around Amy from behind. Mother and baby were both happy and healthy. He and Bucky had passed their first test to prove they could figure this kid thing out. Right now, his future couldn’t look brighter. “I have the most beautiful family.”  
  
“Flatterer.” Amy reached back and kissed his cheek. She protested, but she also agreed. Her boys were almost inhumanly handsome, and their daughter was simply gorgeous. “You two should change for dinner.”  
  
*****  
  
Dinner was a family affair in the main room of the pavilion. Bucky found himself seated at a low table, sandwiched between Steve and Shuri. Amy had claimed her place at the head of the table. Amy’s mother Rina took the spot across from Steve, with Daisuki and his partner Fredrick next to her. Kiki took over the other end of table with a slightly restless Hideo in her lap. It was a relaxed intimate meal. All the food appearing out of insulated baskets piled by the door. Bucky kept waiting for someone to question his presence or even show some unease, the heir to the throne was here for crying out loud. There was nothing. Even Fredrick, who obviously wasn’t any kind of threat, seemed more interested in catching up with Shuri and gushing over the dress she had designed for the Met gala.  
  
Kiki bounced Hideo on her knee, feeding him bites off her plate. Steve was amazed to see how big the little prince had gotten. He could still remember seeing Amy onto her plane to go see the baby. Bucky had made her kiss them both goodbye. It was one of the first times Steve had really let himself believe that maybe the three of them wasn’t just a wild fantasy.  
  
Bucky decided he liked Amy’s mother. It hard not to when one of the first things she had said to him was ‘call me Rina, dear. Steve does.’ He liked her even more when she kept making sure his plate was full.  
  
Amy nursed Sayuri over the second course. Carrying her up to her nursery when she fell asleep.  
  
Hideo started fusing not long after, he was obviously getting sleepy himself. Steve offered to hold him, to give Kiki a chance to eat. Steve wouldn’t lie, he had a lot of pent up paternal energy  
  
During the dessert, Bucky was surprised to discover that Hideo had migrated out of Steve’s lap and into his. Even more surprising, no one seemed worried about that fact. The toddler clambered over him, tugging curiously at his beard and hair, and babbling away happily.  
  
Hideo slipped, falling out of Bucky’s lap and landing heavily on his bottom. His eyes went huge and his lower lip started to quiver. Bucky scooped up the child. Blowing a big raspberry on his belly to distract him before he could start to cry. Hideo looked surprised for a second, then started squirming and giggling uncontrollably.  
  
Bucky set Hideo back in his lap. The little guy was going to hurt himself if he wasn’t careful. “ _Chūibukai ōji._ *”  
  
Kiki smiled and leaned across Shuri to fill Bucky’s teacup. “You’re good with him.”  
  
“He’s sweet.” Bucky said, passing Hideo the slice of cucumber he was reaching for. “I always liked kids.”  
  
Hideo fell asleep a few minutes later. Flopping boneless over Bucky’s knee. Bucky smiled rubbed a hand over Hideo’s soft black hair. They were so like kittens at this age, only three modes, eat, play, or sleep, and they moved between them in the blink of an eye. He looked up to find Steve watching him. It looked like his guy was thinking the same thing he was. Lilly needed younger siblings, and if they couldn’t give them to her right away, they were at least going to practice.  
  
When dinner was done, Bucky helped Kiki get her son settled on her hip without waking him up. The others all left for the big house. Dai and Fredrick would be back after they dropped off the dirty dishes. Everyone else would be up at the big house until they left for the temple tomorrow.  
  
Steve wrapped his arms around Amy, as they stood together in the middle of the main room. Finally, they were alone, they had the rest of the night to themselves. “Have I told you how much I love you?”  
  
Amy nuzzled the centre of his chest. “You’ve mentioned it.”  
  
“Listen to that smooth talker, baby girl. He’s obviously trying to get into your pants.” Bucky purred, pressing against her from behind.  
  
“And you’re not?” Steve shoved Bucky’s shoulder playfully, before pulling him in so they were sandwiching their girl between them. They could hold her closer now that she had thinned down again. No more worrying about crushing precious cargo.  
  
Bucky kissed the nape of Amy’s neck. “Nah. I am. I’m just not a smooth talker like you are. I gotta rely on my good looks.”  
  
Sayuri’s cries interrupted them before Bucky could do more than tug loose the bow holding Amy’s shirt closed. He laughed and groaned. He couldn’t even be mad. As much as he wanted to spend some adult time with Amy, Lilly had to come first. And that sounded like more than just a hungry cry.  
  
*****  
  
Steve tucked his hands behind his head and lay back on the futon. Amy had replaced the mattress they had slept on when it was just the two of them with a larger one, plenty of space for all three of them. The sheets were still just as soft, and it still offered the exact mix of firm and cushioning Steve remembered from dozens of nights spent curled around the woman he loved. Their life in Wakanda was wonderful, but he couldn’t help thinking that living here full time, with Amy, and Bucky, and their daughter, would be as close to heaven as you could get on this planet. Who was he kidding? Living anywhere with his little family was going to be heavenly.  
  
Bucky snuggled against Steve’s side. The mattress on the floor reminded him of those first nights they had spent in Wakanda, the three of them sleeping sprawled together on the floor. An appropriately peaceful way for them to sleep during what felt like another beginning. He closed his eyes and listened to the muffled sounds from across the hall. Life had gotten a lot better since those early days. Amy was singing softly as Sayuri nursed. He smiled when he recognised the song, _Bye Bye Blackbird_ , he was rubbing off on her. He heard her whisper goodnight and relaxed a little more. She’d be in to bed any moment now.  
  
Amy took a moment in the door to just watch them. There was something especially peaceful about having them here. She loved their life in Wakanda, but this really was her home. She belonged here, and they belonged with her. Someday, she would find a way to have them all here. Right now, she had more immediate concerns. “Lilly should be down for at least a couple of hours.”  
  
“Good. Get in here.” Steve held out his arms for her. If she thought she was sleeping anywhere other than tucked in between them she was sadly mistaken.  
  
Amy let him tumble her into the blankets. Coming to rest with her head on Bucky’s chest, with Steve wrapped around both of them.  
  
They fell asleep kissing lazily. Bucky drifted off first. Amy followed a few moments later. Steve tucked the blankets around them. Bucky hadn’t been sleeping well all month, and he would be surprised if Amy had done any better. Fooling around could wait until after they’d all had a good night’s sleep.  
  
*****  
  
Sayuri woke up every few hours during the night. Amy tried to get up for her the first time, but Steve told her to lay back down and that he would get her. He changed Sayuri’s diaper and then carried her back to Amy so she could nurse. Amy struggled into a half sitting position, leaning against Bucky’s side. Steve knelt with them, passing Amy the baby with careful, loving, hands. By the time Sayuri was full, Amy was sleepy, and Bucky was already dozing again. Steve lifted his daughter out of her mother’s arms and kissed the sleepy baby’s head.  
  
The pattern repeated itself the next time Sayuri woke up. Steve was pretty sure this would be their established routine, at least until Sayuri started sleeping through the night better. It was a good routine. Soft and loving.  
  
The third time Steve returned from putting her back down he knew he wasn’t getting back to sleep. Even with all the interruptions, he was still better rested than he had been in a month. All credit to finally having Amy back in their bed, which meant he didn’t wake up looking for her, and neither did Bucky. Not getting back to sleep wasn’t necessarily a bad thing either. Today would be hectic once it got going, they could probably all use a little time together, while they were still alone, and things were quiet.  
  
He rummaged in the very familiar toy chest in the corner, the box he was looking for was close to the top. A quick check of the expiration date told him that the condoms were new. Amy must have picked them up for this visit. He’d have to remind her to pack them when they left, it would be a shame if they went to waste. “You awake gorgeous?”  
  
Amy reached up for Steve. “For you I am.”  
  
Bucky opened one eye and grinned, his hand sliding inside the hem of Amy’s nightgown and pushed it up. She was wearing underwear, but that was a problem Steve could definitely help him solve. “Me too.”  
  
Steve melted to the floor, his hands finding Amy’s hips and dragging her into his lap at the same time his mouth found hers. Steve luxuriated in the taste of Amy’s lips, slowly deepening the kiss. He pulled away just long enough for Bucky to peel Amy’s nightgown over her head, even then, he only traded her mouth for his. They were water in a desert. They were everything he needed in his life.  
  
Bucky pushed Amy’s hair out of the way so he could nuzzle the back of her neck. The feel of her creamy skin under his palm was more than enough to get him going. He knew Steve had initiated, but he was reasonably sure that some puppy dog eyes would convince his guy to let him jump the cue and jump their girl.  
  
He slid his hand between Steve and Amy, running it down Amy’s stomach and into her underwear. His knuckles brushed against Steve’s erection on the way. Steve’s groan made Bucky grin into Amy’s neck. Maybe jumping the cue would be unfair. Someone was very worked up. He wasn’t the only one either. Amy was practically dripping over the fingers he was stroking her with. “Did you miss us, baby girl?”  
  
Amy reached back to cup his head, arching her neck so Bucky could kiss it more easily. “You know I did.”  
  
Steve groaned and rocked his hips. Watching them always heated his blood. He let his eyes rake over them. Amy’s eyes rolled back in her head, Bucky’s fingers working between her legs, predawn light gilding them silver. They were gorgeous together. He ran his hands over Amy to familiarize himself with the feel of her again. Her breasts were a little heavier than they had been. A little more tender too, from the way she gasped at his touch. His fingers faltered as he traced the ink on her ribs. Her tattoo had changed again. Not a major change, he doubted anyone would notice it if they hadn’t spent hours studying the images etched on her skin. There was his star, even brighter in the soft morning light, and next to it, glowing like an ember, a second star. This one was red, a little smaller. Polaris and Sirius. Guiding stars.  
  
Steve found Bucky’s eyes. Two stars. One for each of them. A permanent, if private, deceleration of her love. They had each other; they were a family. For the rest of their lives. He wanted to make it official. He wanted to get married.  
  
Bucky lunged over Amy’s shoulder. Getting his lips to Steve’s and kissing him before he could do something stupid. Like propose to Amy in the middle of seducing her for a second time. Their girl was too cerebral for that. When the time came, they would have to be rational about it.  
  
Steve chuckled into Bucky’s mouth. He could take a hint. Wait for it. There was a lot happening in their lives right now. Once they made it through the next couple weeks, things would calm down. _Then_ Steve could ask her properly. He’d do a better job of it than he had when he’d asked Buck, make it romantic. They had a lifetime together, what was a few weeks or even a month in the grand scheme of things.  
  
Amy wrapped her arms around her boys’ necks. Holding them close as she focused on the way they were busy making her feel. Steve’s sweet wandering caress had stopped with him holding her rib cage, his hands burning hot against her skin. She blamed the way Bucky was kissing him. She’d lose track of what she was supposed to be doing too if he started devouring her like that. Bucky hadn’t let the kiss distract him. Even with Steve kissing him back just as heatedly, Bucky kept up his, stroking, probing, delightful, ministrations. One of them broke off the kiss to come up for air. Amy couldn’t tell which one of them had needed to breath. It didn’t really matter which it had been anyway, not when it resulted in them both turning their attention to her neck. She loved it. kisses as tender as their beards were rough.  
  
It was hard to say where one of them ended and another began once they really got started. Steve certainly didn’t discriminate on who he put his mouth on as he kept them both in his lap. Bucky seemed to gravitate towards whoever was making the best noises. Amy worked her hands into Steve’s pyjama pants so he could compete for best noise on reasonably even footing. He rocked into her touch with a moan that made Bucky’s eyes fix on him like a magnet.  
  
Amy made him do it again. She loved Bucky’s hungry look, the way he bit Steve’s lip and swallowed the rest of the sounds Steve made. At least until his own fingers made _her_ gasp. Then Amy was far to busy to know who’s mouth she was kissing, or who’s hands were where.  
  
Her world narrowed to a pin prick. Then exploded outward. She melted forward into a solid presence she thought was Steve. A presence that wrapped arms tight around her and kissed her as she shook with pleasure. Bucky had disappeared from her back; she could hear rustling cloth that sounded like stripping behind her.  
  
Steve rolled the condom onto Bucky. Kissing Amy as he lifted her out of his lap and guided her into Bucky’s, peeling her panties off in the process.  
  
Bucky wrapped his arm around Amy to grip her left hip, pulling her onto him with a low moan. “I love you, baby girl.”  
  
“Bucky.” Amy breathed his name, as she sank onto him further.  
  
Steve took them settling into each other as a chance to get out of his own clothes. Sinking back down in front of them naked. Amy’s eyes followed him, but she was obviously a little distracted. Steve reached his arms around Amy to Bucky’s sides. Cocooning them in the safety of his arms. Amy looked up at him through long lashes as Bucky pressed his face into her shoulder. Steve run the tip of his nose down Amy’s, tipping his head until their mouths fitted together perfectly.  
  
Amy’s skin tingled all over, trapped between them, she felt so free. Like flying. Better than flying. When Steve finally let her breath, there was nothing she could do except whisper “ _I love you_ ,” over and over in Japanese, hands stroking as much skin on both her boys as she could reach.  
  
Bucky pressed his lips to the napped of her neck, tightening his grip on her hip. How could anyone not feel loved when she dissolved into such a beautiful affectionate mess? A hot, slippery mess, that felt absolutely amazing around him.  
  
Amy nuzzled Steve’s cheek. Everything was bright, shimmering with pleasure. “Stand up.”  
  
“Sweetheart?” Steve cupped her head, peppering her face with kisses. Her breathing wasn’t quite steady, it hitched in time with Bucky’s thrusting. He loved the sound, the sweet rhythm of it, was almost as good as having one of them touch him.  
  
“Stand up.” Amy shoved at his knee. “We’ll take care of you t—” Amy’s last word was cut off with a strangled moan as Bucky moved inside her. Taking care of Steve might have to wait until Bucky finished taking care of her. She’d been too long without her boys. She was all pent up and a second climax had snuck up on her. Just a little more, that was all she needed. She whimpered and tipped her head back onto Bucky’s shoulder.  
  
Steve worked his hand between them, with a little smirk. He would recognise that look anywhere. His girl was close. A little push, and she would finish on Bucky’s dick. Getting her there would be good for her and for Bucky. Steve knew from experience that there were few things that felt as good as being inside Amy when she finished. He found Amy’s clit and rubbed circles around it, a counterpoint to Bucky’s thrusting. And if he knew his girl, just what she needed.  
  
Amy let out something between a sigh and a scream, going limp and letting herself collapse against Steve’s chest. Her hand covering Bucky’s as his grip tightened on her hip and he pulled her closer.  
  
Bucky groaned and buried himself deeper inside her. That was what he liked to feel. Amy’s orgasm clamping her around him. It was heaven. He swore long and fluidly in Russian as he took his own release inside her. He slumped forward too, forehead against Steve’s chest, check pressed into Amy’s hair.  
  
They stayed that way, panting and leaning against Steve, for long moments. Bucky was the one who collected himself first. Sitting back up and slowly easing himself out of Amy before pulling her back against his chest. “Fuck, baby girl. I needed that.”  
  
Amy purred and rubbed her cheek against his. She had needed it too.  
  
“Now, you were saying something about taking care of me?” Steve teased, rocking to his feet.  
  
Amy curled her hand around the back of Steve’s thigh and drew him closer. She had said something like that hadn’t she.  
  
Bucky nuzzled Steve’s hip. His nose bumping against Amy’s until she pulled back a little so he could share. Sharing with her was always way more fun than sucking Steve on his on his own, and he loved sucking Steve. The taste, the way it stretched his jaw, Steve’s fingers digging into his scalp, he loved all of it. He loved it even more when Amy traced the big vein that ran the length of Steve’s cock with the tip of her tongue and then winked at him. When she twisted to nibble at anything he couldn’t fit in his mouth.  
  
Steve’s hands tightened in their hair. Clinging to them both as he finished. His entire body tensed. An explosion of relief overwhelming him. It was more than just pleasure. It was everything he had been missing for far too long.  
  
Knees weak, Steve sunk back to the mattress, he pressed his forehead into Bucky’s neck, trapping Amy between them. It wasn’t like he and Buck have been celibate the last month. He would never get used to the feeling of both of them touching him. He never wanted to. He wanted every time to be as magical as this.  
  
Bucky lay back on the futon, pulling Steve and Amy with him. It was impossible to deny that it was morning now, light was starting to trickle through paper shutters over the window, he could hear birds chirping softly in the threes. Happy as he was to have them all back together, he was very conscious of time passing, and why he was here.  
  
He tried to ignore it. Put everything out of his mind and just enjoy this moment of bliss. He couldn’t shake the anxiety for more than a few minuets at a time. “The doctors are coming today?”  
  
Amy nodded against his chest. “May will be here in a couple hours. She’s coming to Sayuri’s _Omiyamairi_. And then Strange is aiming for some time in the evening.”  
  
“Nervous, Buck?” Steve asked rubbing Bucky’s chest. Bucky knew the plan as well as Steve did. He wouldn’t be checking details if he was feeling 100% about it all. In all the all the excitement of being back together he had almost forgotten that this week was about more than meeting their daughter. Maybe he shouldn’t have insisted Amy sleep in the middle. Bucky always slept better with one of them on either side of him.  
  
Bucky shrugged, cuddling Amy a little closer. She was easier to haul around like a teddy bear than Steve was. She still smelled soothingly of flowers and smoke. “Haven’t had the best luck with brain surgery.”  
  
Amy kissed his temple. Her boy had a gift for understatement. This time would be different, and after this, no one would ever touch her boy’s beautiful brain again. “I’ll be with you the whole time, baby. You know I’d never let anyone hurt you.”  
  
Bucky returned her kiss softly. He knew she wouldn’t. Neither of them would. Steve and Amy would die before they let anything happen to him. He knew that, and he trusted them with more than his life. That didn’t stop him from being nervous. If anything happened to him… It wouldn’t. He would be fine and next week all four of them would be safely back in Wakanda and able to move on with their lives without worrying about what his brain was going to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *hello baby  
> *Careful little prince


	76. Important Introductions

Amy tossed her phone onto her desk with an exasperated sigh. Why did work always have to intrude? Steve and Bucky’s first full day with their daughter and Amy was missing everything. Bucky had a pile of books he intended to read to her. Steve had been completely unable to stop grinning as he dressed her in an ‘ _I ♥️ my 2 daddies_ ’ onesie and a headband with a bow. And was Amy soaking in the warm glow of their love? No. She was taking frustrating phone calls from world leaders to talk them out of trade strategies that would only hurt all the countries involved. Even with that little mess cleaned up she didn’t have long to spend on domestic bliss. Her sister in law should be here soon, and once she arrived Amy would have to start preparing for Sayuri’s _Omiyamairi_. She had to get herself and the baby dressed in their formal clothes, no mean feat. She rubbed her eyes. She didn’t want to waste any of her precious time being frustrated.  
  
Dai slid the door to the office open. Looking over his shoulder nervously. “We have a problem.”  
  
“Dai,” Amy leaned back in her chair. Expression deliberately blank. She knew exactly where all the members of the royal family were, and nothing short of one of them being kidnaped would draw her out of Katsura today. “Two of the most wanted men on the planet are in the dinning room playing with their daughter. We are 24 hours from a major medical procedure on one of those fugitives, I have highly trained surgeons on their way here as we speak. I just got off the phone with the prime minister of Thailand, because apparently no one else can keep him calm, and Sayuri’s _Omiyamairi_ is in three hours. I don’t have time to have a problem.”  
  
“Oh, well in that case.” Dai crossed his arms over his chest. He knew all that. None of it changed the facts at hand. “We don’t have a problem. Either way, your brothers are up at the big house.”  
  
*****  
  
Amy hurried into the room where Dai had stashed her brothers. She had told Steve and Bucky to stay in the Pavilion with Sayuri, but it was a one in a million that they would listen for any length of time. She figured she had five minuets before they worried and came to find her. She didn’t want to think about what would happen if she failed to clean up this mess before then. There was a reason she hadn’t filled her brothers in on everything that had happened this year. “Hey, you guys didn’t have to come. It’s just going to be a quiet thing.”  
  
“Kitsui Ayame Winters.” Matt rounded on his little sister. He was furious. She had done reckless things before, but this, this was too much. “Tell me that my wife is mistaken, and the Winter Soldier isn’t here. Tell me you don’t have half of the CIA’s most wanted list sitting in your house, waiting for medical treatment. Because there is no way if the Winter Soldier is here and Captain America isn’t.”  
  
Amy swore internally. She’d hoped they had only wanted to surprise her by showing up for Sayuri’s _Omiyamairi_. That all she had to do was ask them to check on preparations to get them off the grounds and move dinner to a restaurant to keep them away. If they were here for more than just family duty she was going to need to think fast.  
  
May kissed Amy’s cheek. “I’m sorry. He started asking questions I couldn’t answer. I didn’t know what else to do.”  
  
“You dragged May into this mess? My wife. My _wife_ , Amy. She’s a doctor. She not part of your world.” Matt paced the length of the room. He should have known that she would go off the rails. Someone should have kept a better eye on her after the breakup. She and Steve had been so messy. Then she had run away to Wakanda. When they left her alone, that was when she lost it. They should have been there for her. They should have made sure that she was alright. Because this, whatever this was, was not alright.  
  
Amy eyed his restless movements. It might be too late for cleaver thinking. Amy might have to tackle this head on. “She’s the only one who can do it. And it needs to be done.”  
  
“She’s a civilian. He could kill her in a heartbeat.” Matt snarled. “I can’t believe you would put a member of your family in danger like this.”  
  
“He won’t be a danger to anyone if the surgery works.” Amy countered neatly. “Do you seriously think this was a spur of the moment decision? This is the only option.”  
  
“It isn’t the only option. It isn’t even the best option. There is an easy solution.” Matt crossed his arms and glared at his sister. She clearly wasn’t thinking rationally. Ayame had lost her head for a pretty boy before. Last time he hadn’t been there for her. He wasn’t making the same mistakes again. “We are turning them in and hoping like hell they believe us when we tell them you weren’t involved.”  
  
“He’s not wrong, Aims.” Ken leaned against the wall, trying not to fidget. Ayame had been known to make big plays, but this didn’t feel like a tactical decision. He couldn’t see what her endgame was. “We’ll call Ross, he’ll bring in a team. If we get them in handcuffs before they get here to arrest them… They won’t ask too many questions.”  
  
“Touch either one of them and the Winter Soldier will be the least of your problems.” Amy snapped, drawing her dagger with a metallic rasp. Family or no, she wasn’t about to let anyone lock up her boys.  
  
Fingertips ran down the inside of arm. She looked down Bucky’s hand rested on the inside of her wrist. Five minuets had been an optimistic estimate. She should have known they would be overprotective right now.  
  
Bucky gently worked open Amy’s grip on the knife. She could be hot headed. This wasn’t the time for rash actions. They needed to be calm and rational about it otherwise someone would get hurt. “They’re your brothers, baby girl. I don’t think we need this.”  
  
Amy surrendered her weapon, calming a little more when Bucky slipped it back into the sheath on the small of her back and then kept his hand there. He was right. They could talk through this. If she explained they would understand. Steve and Bucky weren’t a threat to anyone. The Sokovia Accords were an over reaction to a changing world, if they weren’t overturned in the next five years, she would be very surprised. All their behaviour in the wake of the Accords had been in reaction to Zemo’s actions. They were almost certainly going to be pardoned once he went to trial. At least, they would once her lawyers got involved.  
  
Matt narrowed his eyes. The Winter Soldier was standing intimately close to Amy. And wearing a very expensive looking pair of pants. Not the kind of clothes you could buy easily when you were on the run. Exactly the sort of thing Ayame would pick out if she was dressing someone. Amy wouldn’t bother dressing someone she was only sheltering. There was more going on here. “You’re sleeping with him? Or are you back with Steve?”  
  
Ken frowned, eyes on Amy’s left hand. Her empty left hand. “Matt.”  
  
Amy bristled. _Sleeping with_. Like this was just another of her flings. Something meaningless that she needed to get out of her system. Bucky and Steve were so much more than that. “I’m not sure that it is any of your business.”  
  
“Answer the question, Kit.” Matt growled, shifting his feet apart. Her defensiveness was only confirming his suspicions. The terrorist had her wrapped around his little finger.  
  
“Matt.” Ken said again, voice low. He was racking his brain. Trying to dredge up a memory of Amy being disarmed from the depths of his mind and coming up blank.  
  
“What?” Matt snapped. He was in the middle of something and he didn’t need his baby brother distracting him.  
  
“She just let him take her knife.” He could think of dozens of times someone had _tried_ to take away her weapon. Every other time that person ended up in the dirt. Frequently in the dirt and bleeding. Even Dai asked, and then waited for her to give it up willingly.  
  
Matt turned to face his brother. Had he completely lost to plot. “So?”  
  
“So, have you ever seen anyone take a knife off her before?” Ken asked seriously. The Winter Soldier—Barnes? —hadn’t used force. Amy had just… let go of the knife.  
  
Matt froze. He hadn’t. Not even the bastard had been stupid enough to _take_ a weapon away from her. He had _ordered_ her to put whatever she was holding down, and she had listened because she was afraid. But he’d never _taken_ one from her. He read his sitter’s surprisingly open body language; she wasn’t hiding, and she wasn’t afraid of this man. “Fuck. You’re not just sleeping with one of them are you.”  
  
Amy shifted closer to Bucky. “No.”  
  
Ken did some math in his head. Amy and Brian having an accident had never made sense to him. It would take more than just the physical to make Amy slip up. “Sayuri isn’t Brian’s, is she?”  
  
“No.” Steve bounced his baby girl against his chest as he moved to stand with Amy and Bucky. They were a united front. He didn’t know why he had agreed to Bucky’s ‘wait in the hall’ plan in the first place. This was where he belonged.  
  
Matt sighed and slumped against the wall. Nothing involving his sister was ever simple. “Do you love him?”  
  
“I love them both.” Amy slipped her and into Steve’s squeezing as he stepped up beside her. “So much that sometimes it hurts.”  
  
“Ahhh, Kit.” Matt sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “Life was so much easier when you didn’t have feelings.”  
  
Amy leaned into Bucky’s hold, Steve’s hand warm in hers. It had been easier. She didn’t regret starting to feel again though. The joy was more than worth the pain.  
  
Ken raised his hand nervously. “I have a question.”  
  
Amy rolled her eyes. Of course, he did. Her bratty younger brother was always going to be her bratty younger brother. “I’m not going to explain how it works.”  
  
“Yeah. Cool. Didn’t want to know.” Ken turned away from his sister and towards Bucky. How many chances did you get to talk to _James Buchanan Barnes_? “How did you make the Ignatieff shot? I’ve tried, and I can’t line it up from the window you’re supposed to have used.”  
  
Bucky frowned. That shot had been more than seventy years ago. He didn’t see how it had anything to do with Amy or his life with her and Steve. “I wasn’t in the window. I was on the ledge two feet over, shot between the wings of the angel statue.”  
  
“If you were on the ledge, you wouldn’t have been able to use a tripod… or a scope.” Ken felt like someone had told him he was still riding a bike with the training wheels still on. Ignatieff had been over 900 yards from that ledge, and it wasn’t like it was a clean field, there had been that angel statues and then the window to the room he was in, which had to have been covered in grime… A free-standing shot with a Winchester… Even one with good sights… No. Impossible.  
  
Bucky traded a confused look with Steve. He had been known to use a scope when they had time to set up and it looked like they were going to be able to fully secure the area. Both of those situations were few and far between. Most of the time it had made more sense to just take the shot. It was why he always shot twice. The second shot guaranteed the kill. “I didn’t.”  
  
Amy let out a relived sigh. It looked like at least one of her brothers was okay with her life choices. “Bucky, this is my baby brother Ken. Ranger Sniper. Ken, this is Bucky, he’s a better sniper than you.”  
  
*****  
  
Things had calmed down once Ken had broken the tension. Steve had asked Matt about Cupcake and the girls, which would always have helped endear him to the doting father. By the time Amy took Sayuri from Steve and left to get herself and the baby dressed, it looked like everyone was going to be friends. Amy just hoped that they could stay that way without supervision. She hurried through her own dressing. She needed to look presentable, but it wasn’t her day. It was her daughter’s day.  
  
Amy gently wrapped Sayuri in a tiny kimono jacket, pale blue green silk painted with big pink and white waterlilies. This day was already more exciting than what she had planned. She could only hope that the rest of the day went smoothly.  
  
“Kinda feel guilty missing this.” Bucky said leaning against the doorframe. He’d left Steve to catch up with Amy’s brothers. He wasn’t much of a conversationalist these days. Watching Ayame get their little girl ready for her big day was much more up his alley. His girls both looked beautiful. Sayuri in her miniature formal wear. Amy in a purple and white kimono. Her over robe was shear, embroidered with flowers and butterflies. The underrobe had a subtle white on white brocade pattern of curled foxes.  
  
Sayuri turned her face towards his voice, squirming on her back. Her legs kicked a little faster. And Bucky absolutely sure that was a smile this time.  
  
“Did you hear daddy?” Amy cooed tying the last bow over her daughter’s stomach.  
  
“’Corse she did.” Bucky knelt next to Amy, slipping one finger into Sayuri’s fist, and waving her hand around. “She’s brilliant.”  
  
“She really is.” Amy perched a headband covered in dangling flowers on Sayuri’s head. Completing her finery. “Why do you feel guilty?”  
  
“’S like a baptism, right? Should be a big family thing. Her papa should be there at very least.” Bucky gently touched the silver butterfly comb holding Amy’s hair back from her face. Steve deserved to be there for them. Steve would be such a good dad if the world would let him.  
  
“I think she would prefer having her fathers for the rest of her life, rather than knowing they were there for something she won’t remember.” Amy caught Sayuri’s lip starting to quiver. Someone was done with patiently laying on the floor while her mother fussed over her clothes. Amy scooped her up and set her in the crook of Bucky’s arm.  
  
The baby quieted right away, nuzzling into Bucky’s hold as he beamed down at her. She was so perfect. “Daddy and papa love you, Lilypad. Even when we can’t be right there with you.”  
  
“My brothers won’t be coming either you know. My father isn't even in the country.” Amy said leaning against Bucky’s side. “It isn’t that strange for the men to forgo the boring part of the ceremony.”  
  
Bucky ducked his head to kiss Sayuri. “I don’t want to be an absentee father. I want her to always know daddy is there. I don't want you to ever feel alone.”  
  
Amy tucked her head against Bucky’s neck. She wanted that too. Her little girl deserved all the love and protection she could get.  
  
Steve smiled at the tableau in front of him and snapped a quick picture on his phone. His family looked so perfect together. “Dai’s looking for you. He said your Grandmother is ready to leave.”  
  
“You’d better go then.” Bucky passed Amy the baby as gently as he could. Carefully smoothing her hair and jacket into place.  
  
Amy kissed his cheek. “She’ll always know you love her, Bucky baby.”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky leaned his head on Steve’s shoulder as they watched Amy form up with her family. He liked seeing their girl at home like this. Rolling her eyes affectionately as Dai fretted over her obi knot, her mother cooing over Sayuri, Ken stood next to his mother making faces at his new niece. May and Shuri stood near by chatting, both dressed in gossamer Kimono similar to Amy’s but in soft orange and green respectively, Kiki twirled an umbrella on her shoulder while she waited. A whole flock of white haired and purple eyed women milling around, all giving off the same predatory aura Amy did. Bucky recognised Sakura, who waved subtlety at them with her fan.  
  
Matt wandered over to stand by Steve and Bucky. “She’s cute. I’ll give you that.”  
  
“All your sister. I just chipped in on the hair.” Steve demurred. Cute didn’t even begin to cover his baby girl. She was flawless. The most perfect human he had ever seen. Amy made Sayuri wave at her fathers as the women started to leave. Steve felt his heart melt. He was starting to think it would be a regular occurrence, at least as long as Sayuri was tiny. He just loved her so much. From the way he leaned harder against his side, Bucky was in the same club.  
  
“Right,” Ken stretched out his shoulders. He wasn’t in the right mood to sit around. Visits to Katsura had always meant moving, it was just muscle memory at this point. “I only got leave on the condition that I get some shooting time in. Who wants to hit the range?”  
  
“There’s a shooting range here?” Steve hadn’t seen one on all his visits, and it would take up enough space that it would be hard to miss. Especially a range long enough to offer Ken any kind of challenge. Amy didn’t like shooting, he had assumed she went into the city, or even down to the American base when she wanted to practice.  
  
“Sort of.” Ken shrugged and started down the path towards the big house. “You’ll see.”  
  
The room in the basement of the big house was a strange place. It was a large space sure, but not large enough to be a shooting range. It reminded Steve more of Shuri’s lab or one of Tony’s virtual training simulators than anything else. Half the floor was made up of one-inch squares that looked like the could move independently. The other end was completely smooth. A touch screen terminal glowed against the end wall. A rack of guns lined the wall next to the terminal. Not real guns. Mat grey practice weapons, operational slides and triggers, but solid barrels. From the way Ken was testing them they were all weighted.  
  
Matt headed straight for the terminal. “You in the mood for Chitauri?”  
  
Ken strapped on a throat mic and popped in an ear bud. The AI would keep up a stream of chatter, letting him know what was going on and how many of his targets had actually gone down, along with ‘team member’ talking to distract him. “Yeah, give me the third terrace of 100 Park.”  
  
The floor at the other end shifted. Reordering itself into the topography of a roof top terrace. Waist high wall, a built-in planter, bench seating. Projectors in the corners of the rooms skinned it with a life like texture. Painting the walls around it with a 270◦ panorama of midtown Manhattan. The ceiling glowed with projected light too. Steve almost laughed when he recognised the slash in the sky. Ken was going alien hunting.  
  
A handprint glowed to life on the wall by the terminal. Ken shouldered his chosen rifle and pressed his hand to the shape. A count down started over it. 10. Ken rolled his shoulders and set his feet more firmly against the floor. 9. He closed his eyes and to a series of deep breaths to regulate his breathing. An elevated heartrate was the enemy of a steady hand. He opened his eyes again once he got his stable. 4. He wondered what difficulty level Matt had set the simulation to. 3. He wanted something that would challenge him. 2. But nothing so difficult that he would embarrass himself in front of _Barnes_. He had an award with the guys name on it for gods’ sake. 1.  
  
All thoughts vanished from Ken’s mind. He pushed away from the wall, sprinting for the cover of the railing. Aiming specifically for the corner between a planter and the railing. Cover on two sides. Two seconds to get in position, two seconds to get his range in on his scoped, and he was off. The aliens in their chariot things were coming through the portal a little to fast for him to bottle neck them there. He focused his fire on the ones trying to make it to the side streets. There was a kill box in front of grand central, courtesy of a digital Captain America and team.  
  
Bucky watched Ken take ten shots in a minuet. Fast for a sniper. There was something about Amy’s home that changed everything about combat skills. All the things he was good at, the things that made him a threat. They treated them all like a game here. It was a game _here_. Outside this place they used these skills to hurt some people and protect others. But here, in the gilded playground that was Amy’s home, they could practice just for fun. “Do you know where we put my arm?”  
  
Steve looked over at Bucky curiously. His guys eyes were shining. He knew that look. It was the same one Amy got when she got to spar with someone who offered an actual challenge. “In the main room back at the pavilion. Why?”  
  
“I think…” Bucky licked his lips. All of the challenge of shooting with none of the bloodshed. From the shots Amy’s younger brother was making, the simulation even had full environmental interference. It had been ages since he had actually taken a shot. Even in Volgograd he hadn’t done much more than over watch and stand there while Amy thrashed a squad of Spetsnaz. This though, this he could do. He wouldn’t even have to feel guilty about it. “I think I want to play too.”  
  
*****  
  
By the time Steve came back with Bucky’s arm, Ken had finished his simulation as was talking Bucky through the available gun options. Ken was grinning from ear to ear, very much a kid showing off his toys. Matt leaned against the terminal, occasionally putting in his two cents. Bucky was nodding along, engaged in the technical explanation.  
  
Bucky looked up when Steve set down the long case that held the arm. “’d you seriously go after those fuckers with just the damn shield?”  
  
“Yup,” Steve flipped open the clasps on the case. “Helped Nat get onto one of the chariots so she could fly to the top of Stark tower too.”  
  
“New rule.” Bucky stripped his shirt over his head and tossed it at Steve. “You and _Ryzhiy_ aren’t allowed out without adult supervision.”  
  
Steve snorted. Buck was one to talk. Not like he’d ever done anything stupid like run off and try and hunt down every high-ranking Hydra member left alive after DC all by himself. “Does Sam count as adult supervision?”  
  
Bucky traded his shoulder cover for the arm. “He’s probably the best you’re going to do.”  
  
The socket clicked into place and Bucky felt his molars buzz as the circuits connected. Nerve connectivity was weird. He shifted his balance to accommodate the new weight. He didn’t have to shift that much. This arm weighed almost nothing compared to the old one.  
  
“How’s it feel?” Steve asked running his fingers around the smooth rim where Bucky’s arm met his flesh. It felt like it was sitting flush, he couldn’t see any misalignment, and it didn’t look like it was rubbing against Bucky’s scars. Bucky claimed this one was better than the old one, but Steve still worried about his comfort.  
  
Bucky rolled his shoulder. Slowly working his way down the muscle groups. They all felt like they were working. Nothing like his old arm, the movements were smooth, and he had full feeling in his hand. He flexed the fingers. Full feeling and full range of motion. Shuri was brilliant. “Still weird that it doesn’t hurt.”  
  
Bucky slipped on the throat mike and it’s accompanying earpiece. They were comfortable. He shouldn’t be surprised. His girl only had the best. He tested the rifle sights and the feel of the butt against his shoulder. Perfect on both counts. Only the best.  
  
Steve squeezed Bucky’s shoulders. The metal one was only a little harder than the flesh. He looked good. Relaxed and happy. “I think Ken is anxious to show you how to play.”  
  
“Better let me go then, huh punk.” Bucky kissed the tip of Steve’s nose.  
  
He took his place next to Ken. His black hand shone dully against the wall. He didn’t hate how it looked. The timer didn’t start. Bucky looked around to figure out why. Ken and Matt were both staring at him like he was crazy. “What?”  
  
Ken felt like he had been hit in the face with a shovel. “You just called Captain America a punk.”  
  
“He is a punk.” Bucky snorted. People still put Steve on a pedestal, that was good to know. “Are we doing this or did I get all dressed up for nothing.”  
  
Steve shook his head in exasperation and leaned against the wall. Bucky’s good days were a mixed blessing. “You’ll have to forgive Bucky. Hydra tried to erase his personality, unfortunately they missed some bits.”  
  
Bucky winked at Steve. This was just the distraction he needed. “Your girlfriend likes those bits.”  
  
Matt rubbed his eyes. “I need a sandwich.”  
  
“Wouldn’t help.” Steve leaned over and hit the button to activate the simulation countdown. “Buck’s never been good at following the rules.”  
  
Bucky’s heart leapt as the numbers ticked towards zero. He pushed away from the wall and rolled into cover inside of a heartbeat. Vaulting the planter to set himself up in what he thought was the better vantage point. He had more options than Ken did. He could use the arm to stabilize and forgo a stand.  
  
Ken was two steps behind him. Dropping into his old position and setting up his bipod in a fluid motion.  
  
Bucky took his first pair of shots. The rifle recoiled realistically against his shoulder. A chariot spiralled towards the earth. He took a breath and waited for the crash that always came after a kill. Nothing. No backlash. No wave of guilt. He didn’t feel bad, because he didn’t have to feel bad. None of this was real. He lined up another target. He could do this all day, without it turning him into a monster. Ken took out the third target Bucky had marked before he could. A neat double tap.  
  
Between shots, Bucky snuck a look at Amy’s youngest brother. He was a good shot. Good enough that Bucky wouldn’t want to go up against him in a real game of duelling snipers. Of the two he seemed to be taking the revelation that their sister was in a relationship with the most wanted men on the planet the best. Bucky didn’t know how he would handle being in their position. But then Becca hadn’t been anything like Amy. “You’re fine with this?”  
  
“I mean,” Ken took two quick shots at chariots coming out of the scar. “I was always voting for Aims to make a go of it with Brian and have sniper babies, but you’ll do.”  
  
Bucky picked off another target. “Well, I can’t promise sniper babies.”  
  
“But you make her happy.” Ken said lining up another shot only to have Bucky hit it and the one he had intended to go for next in quick succession. He was willing to bet any child of Bucky’s, genetic or otherwise, would be at least an acceptable shot. “And I’d rather she gets to be happy than perfect.”  
  
Bucky finished off the wave and pulled his head away from his scope. “Happy, I can do.”  
  
“Can you take down that space whale?” Ken said with a laugh. He didn’t think Ayame would put up with anything less, not anymore.  
  
Bucky’s eyes lit up at the monster. Now that would be a challenge. Armoured all over. The only weak spots he could see were the eyes. This was so much more fun than the real thing.  
  
*****  
  
Steve pushed away from the wall as the projectors powered down. Bucky was grinning like a child. Completely at ease even with the arm on. He even had the same glint in his eye that Amy got after a good fight. Steve hadn’t seen him smile like that since before the war. No. Steve had never seen him smile like _this_. This was different. This was the new Bucky. The Bucky that had gone through more than any person should, survived, and was starting to come out the other side. This wasn’t the kid he had grown up with, this was the man he was going to spend the rest of his life with. “Had fun?”  
  
Bucky slung his left arm around Steve’s neck. He really had. Being good at things was fun. Being good at things without having to kill anyone was even better. “Think Shuri would put one of these in for me?”  
  
“I bet she could come up with something similar.” Steve took the gun from him and hung it back up. He wondered if Amy was back yet. He kind of wanted to show Bucky the hot springs, but he didn’t want her to miss out Buck’s first time.  
  
The onsen would be the perfect way to spend the rest of the day. A hot soak, a good dinner, and then bed. Maybe another love making session to make sure they all slept through the night. This week was turning out better than Steve could have hoped. Once everything was over tomorrow, he and Bucky should talk about rings. Steve was more than ready to take the next step with his family.  
  
*****  
  
Sunset found all four of the men lounging on the porch of the Fox Pavilion, sipping ice-cold beers. Matt was telling the story of Amy’s visit to Cuba last year from his perspective. Claiming he should have known Steve and Bucky weren’t their when Amy opted to stay Brian’s spotter instead of leading the charge. Steve was laughing along, his shoulder brushing Bucky’s companionably.  
  
Bucky turned the bottle in his hand studying the strange creature of the label. Some kind of deer crossed with an eastern dragon, a gold main flowing back from a narrow head crowned with horns, more flocking on each delicately cloven hoof. He leaned back on his elbow and took another long draught of the beer. Whatever the mascot, the liquid itself was crisp and smooth. Sun ripened wheat and fresh spring water trapped in brown glass. It tasted good enough he didn’t even miss the buzz of alcohol.  
  
The sound of approaching voices made him look up. His girls were back. Amy, and Shuri talking in low voices about historic building techniques and Japanese architecture earthquake resistant properties. May added a comment about practicality being elegant. Bucky set down his beer. He couldn’t wait to hear how the day had gone.  
  
Shuri broke into a run and threw herself at him as soon as she caught sight of him. “You’re wearing the arm!”  
  
“I am.” Bucky picked Shuri up and spun her around. He’d considered taking it off once they finished training. Then he’d remembered that wearing it was part of the reason they had their Lilypad in the first place. Wearing it tonight had felt appropriate. Besides, today had been a good day. He wanted to make the most of it. He had a lot of tactile affection to shower on people. Having two hands would help with that.  
  
Matt held his arms out towards his wife, who stole his beer as she settled in his lap.  
  
“How did it go?” Amy asked letting Steve take Sayuri out of her arms. It had been a long day for their little girl, and she was well and truly passed out. A slack little bundle of silk, her headband falling off. She hadn’t even woken up when all the Aunts and her Grandmother had kissed her goodbye and left at the entrance to the compound.  
  
“Ken took us down to your shooting range.” Steve rocked Sayuri softly to keep her asleep, wrapping his free arm around Amy. “They were like kids at Christmas.”  
  
Amy leaned against Steve. Soaking in his warmth and watching Bucky waltz Shuri along the Pavilion’s porch. Trying flutily to teach her to two-step. She loved seeing him happy. “Tomorrow morning is going to be hard.”  
  
“We’ll get through it.” Steve held Amy a little tighter and kissed her temple. The three of them together. They could get through anything.  
  
“Baby girl, get over here and help me show the Princess how to chicken walk.” Bucky called, twirling Shuri in a tight circle.  
  
Amy kissed Steve’s cheek. Steve was right. Tomorrow would be hard, but they would get through it, and it would be worth it to give Bucky more days like this. She left Steve smiling and holding his daughter and bounded toward Bucky. It would be worth almost anything to give them a lifetime like this.


	77. A Long-awaited Surgery

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> First, let me say I'm sorry.
> 
> Second, extra long chapter next Monday. I'm not completely evil.

Bucky took a deep breath and looked around the operating theater. It was an internal room, only one exit. He circled the instrument stand, careful not to touch any of the things laid out on the sterile sheet. May, Strange, Shuri and Dai were all waiting in the scrub room. Being allowed in first and having a chance to look around was supposed to help him feel more in control of the situation. It was only kind of working. Behind him, he could feel Amy watching intently. Her being here was supposed to be reassuring him too. It would be, if he hadn’t figured out how she showed her anxiety early in their relationship. A completely still and silent Amy was a worried Amy.  
  
He touched the back rest of the surgical chair. He understood why they needed him sitting up with his head restrained. He just wasn’t looking forward to it. At least he’d be sitting forward instead of back, and they had figured out how to do this without shaving his head. Keyhole surgery, that was what May had called it when she talked him through everything last night. Just a small bur hole in his temple. They would take all everything out in small pieces. All he had to do was sit, stare into Amy’s eyes, talk to her so everyone knew they hadn’t hit anything vital, and try not to burn through his anaesthesia too fast.  
  
It sounded simple when he put it like that. So why couldn’t he get his heartrate under 135?  
  
“Doing alright, Bucky Baby?” Amy rubbed his back as reassuringly as she could. It felt like a cold comfort right now. He looked like such a lost child, barefoot in scrub pants and an undershirt, tight black cuff covering his bad shoulder. Completely different from the gregarious two-armed man from last night. He was still her little wolf pup, so in need of protection, for all he could be a killer.  
  
Bucky shrugged. He wasn’t but it was either do this or keep putting his family at risk anytime he got stressed out. And his family wasn’t solely made up of people that could handle themselves against him anymore. He prodded the little wheeled stool next to the chair. “You won’t be comfortable sitting on that for more than an hour.”  
  
“Physical comfort is an irrelevancy.” Amy wrapped her arms around him and pressed herself against his back. As if a little thing like a stiff back would stop her from protecting him. “I grew up meditating in waterfalls, _Mon Loup_. I few hours on a stool isn’t going to kill me.”  
  
He rubbed her arm, drinking in the comfort of her skin. Even without her powers it helped. It helped a lot. So did knowing that Steve was sitting outside with their daughter. He would keep their Lilypad safe no mater what. “Am I still going to be able to feel you with the paralytic?”  
  
Amy nodded against his shoulder blade. They had put a lot of thought into how to sedate him. Needing him conscious had complicated everything. She would have preferred to put him all the way under, let him sleep through the worst of it and wake up safe and happy. She would burn herself out making sure he never felt afraid. “You should be able to feel everything from the neck down, you just won’t be able to move.”  
  
“Okay.” Bucky took a deep breath. “Let them in.”  
  
*****  
  
The waiting room was a plushily appointed siting room, not a sterile institutional space. Cushy couches, dark wood tables, a full bookshelf, even a go board on the coffee table. Dai had arranged a bassinet for Sayuri and a cooler full of premade bottles so Steve wouldn’t have to leave to take care of her. Which Steve deeply appreciated, Sayuri was the only thing that would tear him away right now. Being able to look after her here was worlds better. He knew why he wasn’t allowed in the operating theatre. That didn’t mean he wasn’t worried out of his mind.  
  
Amy’s brothers were staying until May was ready to leave. Ken had pointed out that it would be less suspicious that way. Steve was grateful for the company in the waiting room. Anything to keep himself from dwelling. Bucky had survived worse, and Amy was looking after him. He didn’t know what he would do if he didn’t have Matt to distract him with go and Ken to help keep a surprisingly awake Sayuri entertained.  
  
Currently Ken had Sayuri on his lap bouncing her gently, her hands curled tight around his thumbs. Her grip was getting better every day. Steve was almost as proud of her as he was worried about her parents. He was going to have to lean the nursery rhyme Ken was singing, Lilly obviously liked the sound of the Japanese.  
  
Matt leaned over the go board considering his move. His leg betrayed his anxiety, bouncing in time with his heat rate.  
  
“How mad are you?” Steve propped his elbows on his knees. Distracted and worried as he was, Matt was giving him a run for his money at go. They had played nine games and the score was four to five. And the more Steve looked at the board, the more he thought he’d painted himself into a corner this round.  
  
“I’m not mad. Just…” Matt sighed and leaned back in his chair. Steve would understand. Look at everything he had done to protect the people he cared about. “She’s my wife. I’m supposed to protect her.”  
  
Steve nodded. He had similar protective instinct. One he was trying to get over. But his people weren’t exactly normal. He made his move, which was more delaying the inevitable than trying to win. “Amy will look after her.”  
  
“Yeah, I know.” Matt flipped over another game piece. “What makes it worse is I would have done the same thing. Your secret is safe with us. Kit probably would have gotten custody anyway.”  
  
“At least that’s what you’re telling yourself.” Ken chuckled.  
  
Steve grinned and tried to figure out a move that would at least prolong the game.  
  
Sayuri started squirming and whimpering. Her lip trembled with impending tears. Ken checked her diaper and made a face.  
  
“I’ll change her.” Steve held out his arms for his daughter. Ken didn’t look up to the task, and it would save Steve from admitting that he was about to lose.  
  
*****  
  
It was another four hours before there was any news from the operating room. Steve lost at go a few more times. He wasn’t bad at the go, he’d picked it up pretty fast playing with Amy regularly, but he was too distracted to play strategically.  
  
Sayuri had a bottle and fell asleep in her bassinet. Steve rocked the basket gently any time she stirred. He prayed for her to sleep. For his daughter to rest peacefully and never know the worry her parents were facing. Little as she was, she wouldn’t remember this. That was one small blessing.  
  
Finally, the door opened. Steve shoved away from the table, not caring that the game board scattered, or that the table caught Matt in the shins hard enough to make him swear. All that mattered were his people, and the news coming through that door. Amy emerged first. Pale as her hair, with dark circles under her eyes. He opened his arms for her. His throat too tight to voice any of the questions he needed answers to.  
  
Amy melted into Steve’s hold. She was exhausted, her entire stomach was trying to crawl out her throat, and she was so relived she could cry. She wasn’t quite done yet. One of her boys was alright. The other needed a little love from her before she could completely let go. “It looks like everything went well. He’s sleeping now.”  
  
“Thank God.” Steve whispered, cradling her head against his chest. Bucky was alright. Ayame was alright. Everything would be fine.  
  
The rest of the surgical team funnelled out of the operating theatre. Dai brushed his knuckles against Amy’s on his way by. Shuri looked ready to collapse. The doctors were in slightly better shape, but they looked worn out too.  
  
“Thank you for everything.” Steve shifted Amy so she was tucked under his arm and offered his hand for Doctor Strange to shake. May, he pulled into a hug, they were family. “Any idea when he’ll be awake?”  
  
“Given his particular metabolism?” May said smiling tiredly. “Any number I give you would be a complete guess.”  
  
Steve would have liked a timeline, but if the question was how fast Bucky would metabolise whatever they had given him, they shouldn’t have to wait too long. He felt Amy sag against him a little more, probably doing the same math he was, and coming up with the same reliving number. “Anything else we should know?”  
  
May hesitated. “We did pretty well. No major damage. There will still be some bruising. He might… He might not be all there when he first wakes up.”  
  
“What do you mean?” Amy fisted her hand in the back of Steve’s shirt, her heart joined her stomach in her throat. The surgery was supposed to stop Bucky from losing himself, not make those losses permanent.  
  
Strange exchanged a look with May before picking up the explanation. “It’s hard to say what he’ll remember right away, what will need some time to come back to him, and what’s gone forever. It’s important that you don’t push him. Given where the damage it, he is very susceptible to implanted memories. Implanted memories could be very dangerous for him. They have a nasty habit of going dark places, and with his muscle memory...”  
  
“I still don’t know what that means. What do we need to do for him?” Steve spread his hand protectively over the small of Amy’s back. Bucky wasn’t here for him to shelter, so she would just have to put up with filling in. From the tenseness under his palm, this was news to her too.  
  
“Give him space.” May said soothingly. “Just let it come back naturally.”  
  
“Or give him at least six months to let whatever he does remember settle.” Strange said with an indifferent shrug. “A year would be better.”  
  
Amy’s fingers itched for a weapon. In retrospect her decision to go into the surgery unarmed was a mistake. She doubted Steve had anything on him either. Unlike her and Bucky, he didn’t feel the need to keep a blade on him at all times. She’d been so worried about what would happen during the surgery, she’d forgotten to worry about the aftermath. He’d remember Steve. He’d remembered Steve through worse than today’s surgery, but beyond that… She needed a run and a long fight, and she was barely standing upright without throwing up as it was. Amy locked all her feeling in a trunk and pushed the trunk off a cliff. She let ice fill her veins. Better cold and unemotional than irrational. “Thank you, Doctor. Is there anything else?”  
  
“I don’t think so. You know how to do the follow up exams.” Strange opened a portal against the wall, stepping through and disappearing before Steve could say anything. “And I do have the Mordo situation under control.”  
  
“Call if you have any questions.” May wrapper her arms around Amy. Her sister in law had looked scared before she shut down. Amy was never scared.  
  
“I will. Thank you, May.” Amy submitted to the hug, even as she retreated internally. Steve would need someone to lean on if this went sideways. She would need to be strong for him, which meant not feeling pain herself. For her boys, she would be silk and steel. Unfeeling. Unyielding. And yet still soft to the touch. She would be a goddess.  
  
Matt and Ken both hugged her on their way out assuring her that everything would be alright and reminding her to call if she needed anything. Matt stressed the word _anything_. Amy was grateful that they would be on a plane before Bucky woke up. She could be strong for Steve, but she wasn’t sure she could face more than that.  
  
*****  
  
Steve shifted Amy so she was settled more comfortably in his lap. Her breathing was slow, but he didn’t think she was sleeping. He knew he wouldn’t be anytime soon. They had been sitting here for hours. Sayuri had nursed twice already, and if the way she was starting to fuss sleepily in her basket was any indication she was going to need feeding again soon. Bucky should be awake by now.  
  
Amy nestled her head against Steve’s neck. She should eat something. Or at least drink something with electrolytes. Neither sounded appealing. She didn’t want to face food or drink until Bucky was awake and they could be sure that everything was alright.  
  
Bucky’s brain was fuzzy. The dark was comfortable, but he couldn’t stay here. He had to get back. There was someone he needed to get back to. It was important. There was someone he couldn’t leave alone. Someone who needed him. He struggled with his sluggish brain. One name stood out in sharp relief against the mush of all his other memories. “Steve?”  
  
Steve set Amy on the arm of the chair and moved closer to the Bucky and the hospital bed. “Yeah Buck, I'm here.”  
  
“I’m sorry I shot you.” Bucky’s voice cracked. His throat was so dry. He started to cough. It hurt, nails being driven into his skull. They’d fallen. Steve had rescued him, they’d fallen out of the… boat… plane… thing… and then… He remembered water. He remembered pulling Steve from the river. Being pulled from the river? Everything was so confused. He couldn’t focus. Thinking hurt too much.  
  
“’S alright, Buck. I forgive you.” Steve hurried to pass Bucky a waiting glass of water.  
  
The water helped. At least Bucky’s mouth and throat weren’t dry anymore. Bucky took a deep breath and let himself scan the room beyond Steve. Looking didn’t hurt, just thinking. It was a fairly standard hospital recovery room, neutral easy to wash colours. The sheets were better than average. He was a little surprised he wasn’t wearing a hospital gown. The under shirt and pants he was wearing were soft too. Soft but still largely unremarkable.  
  
The most striking feature was the woman perched on the arm of the room’s one chair. She was gorgeous. She was also staring at him intently. Eyes boring into him. Purple eyes. What did that remind him of? Hadn’t a woman with purple eyes stabbed him once? That was it. During the war. This couldn’t be her though. That woman had black hair. Whoever this was had distinctive silver hair. He’d remember that hair. She had to be someone, otherwise there was no way Steve would let her into the room while Bucky was asleep. “Who’s she?”  
  
Steve froze. No. The doctors had said he might not remember, Steve had assumed it was an all or nothing thing. This was worse. This was so much worse. Bucky remembered him, he had to remember Amy too. He couldn’t even tell Bucky who she was, everything she meant to him, to them. “She’s…”  
  
Amy couldn’t let either of them see the pain. Amy put on her best geisha smile and set her hand gently on Steve’s arm. He was struggling to come up with an answer that wouldn’t risk implanting memories, and to deal with the implication of him not remembering. Her sweet optimist, he obviously hadn’t spent the last few hours coming to terms with it. She had. She could handle it for a little while at least. “Ayame. A friend.”  
  
Bucky struggled into a sitting position. Steve helped him. The arm around his ribs felt right. Familiar. There was something else though. Someone missing. At least one person. More than one? He searched his memory. Red hair. He could remember red hair, and a wanting to protect her. His little girl. “Where’s _Ryzhevolosaya Decochka_?”  
  
“She safe. She’s in Bermuda this week.” Steve rubbed Bucky’s arm reassuringly. He remembered Nat. That was something at least. The rest would come back to him. It would. He snuck a glance over his shoulder at Amy. She had her geisha mask on. Cool, and indifferent to the world.  
  
It had to.  
  
Sayuri started to cry. Awake and hungry again.  
  
Amy unfolded herself from the chair with affected effortless grace. She was a goddess. As far as the world knew, she didn’t feel physical pain, let alone emotional. And she had more important things to do than wallow in self-pity. “If you gentlemen will excuse me.”  
  
*****  
  
N: Are you going to tell me how the surgery went, or do I have to fly over there myself?  
  
S: The good news is, he knows who I am, and he remembers you.  
  
N: Left a couple important people off that list, Cap.  
  
S: He’s still healing.  
  
*****  
  
N: I can be there by tomorrow if you need me.  
  
A: No one will thank you for getting yourself arrested. Physically everyone is fine.  
  
N: And mentally?  
  
N: Emotionally?  
  
A: We’ll figure it out.  
  
A picture message pinged on Nat’s screen. Sayuri in a frog onesie with a fly shaped bow on her head. From the way her eyelids were sagging, and her tongue was sticking out of her mouth she’d had her dinner and was right on the verge of falling asleep.  
  
N: You can’t just send me cute pictures to distract me.  
  
N: Although she is freaking adorable.  
  
*****  
  
Steve let Bucky lean on him as they made their way up the steep narrow stairs of the Fox pavilion. It was probably a vain hope, but he had this crazy idea that seeing the bed they had shared would help shake something lose. Steve didn’t want to spend the night knowing that Amy was in the next room, cold, lonely, and probably terrified that she had lost them both.  
  
Bucky stumbled, foot catching on the edge of a woven mat. Steve caught him. An arm around his waist. Bucky looked up at him. There was something very right about looking at Steve from this angle. Slowly, he reached up and stroked Steve’s cheek, fingers sinking into his soft beard. Steve didn’t pull away. If anything, his eyes lit up. Bucky looked at his hand. He knew what this beard felt like, and the cheek underneath when the beard was shaved… And the lips it framed so perfectly. “We kissed.”  
  
Steve’s heart swelled with hope. He was remembering. “Yeah Buck.”  
  
Bucky’s brow furrowed. He remembered the kiss, more than one, but there was no guilt or nerves associated with it. There were other guys, guys before Steve, every kiss with one of them was accompanied by guilt and fear of discovery. But not Steve. “Is that allowed now?”  
  
“Yeah.” Steve slid his hands down to Bucky’s hips. Bucky remembered kissing him. Which hopefully meant he remembered being in love. It was also a promising sign. Amy had been an established part of their life before Bucky had ever kissed him. “Yeah it is.”  
  
Bucky pulled Steve’s face down to his. The kiss felt right. It felt like home. ‘Bucky, I want to get married.’ The words echoed in Bucky’s mind. He’d laughed. Laughed and kissed Steve. ‘Is that a yes?’ It had been a yes. They were going to be together forever. Him and his Stevie. Just like he had always dreamed.  
  
The revelation made him pull away from the kiss. Could he really be that lucky? Or was he hallucinating? No. They had kissed, and it was allowed. There was nothing in the world that could keep Bucky from Steve if he wasn’t putting the man he loved in danger. Bucky nudged a pillow with his toe. He could almost picture Steve’s head nestled on it, next to his. There was something pleasantly cool pressed against the back of his neck in the memory, and the blankets lay heavy over his ribs. No. That wasn’t this bed. That bed was somewhere else. _Their_ bed was somewhere else. “This isn’t home.”  
  
Steve looked down at the Futon. There were only two pillows. Of course, there were only two pillows. Why would they have bothered with a third when Amy always used Bucky? The bubble of hope that Bucky would remember before they went to sleep popped. “No. No, it isn’t.”


	78. Purgatory

Bucky wasn’t feeling up to more than shuffling around the pavilion looking at things this morning. He’d already poked through the little armoury off the bedroom he and Steve were sharing, and the closet next door. There had been lots interesting things in the armoury. Amy obviously took very good care of her weapons. He respected that. He had also been pleased with what he had discovered in the closet. Or rather what he hadn’t discovered. It had been full to bursting with clothes, all of them Amy’s. When he had started poking around, he had been worried that he would find evidence that Steve and Amy were more than friends. So far it looked like that fear had been unfounded. All of Steve’s things were safely packed in his bag. The bedroom they were staying in looked like it was the best in the building. It was definitely Amy’s. Her things were still in the cupboards. He wasn’t sure where she was sleeping, but it was nice of her to give it up for them while he was recovering.  
  
He’d taken a short nap, before moving on to the other side of the hall. Another bedroom, this one made up as a nursery. He’d expected that, he’d heard the baby last night and the cries had sounded close. A futon rolled in the corner answered the question of where Amy was sleeping at least. There was a cat curled on it now, green eyes open and watching him. He picked up the stuffed bear sitting on the changing table. With its silver arm and black jacket, it looked like him. Like he had at least. He wondered where Steve had found it.  
  
The baby fussed in its basket. Her, not it, Bucky corrected himself moving a little closer. The little shirt thing she was wearing said _Daddy’s Princess_. Bucky leaned over the bassinet. He rubbed her belly softly to sooth her. She was cute even with her face all scrunched up. Soft golden hair, and the sweetest pout. “Hello beautiful. Who are you?”  
  
“Her name’s Sayuri. We call her Lilly.” Steve leaned as casually as he could against the wall, watching Bucky for any sign of recognition. He had to remember Lilly. He had to. He doted on her every breath. Loved her since she was just a tiny bump.  
  
Bucky smoothed his hand over the baby’s head. She was a pretty little thing. Corn silk curls and that determined jaw. No doubting whose daughter she was. “She looks like you.”  
  
Steve stepped up next to Bucky, resting his hand on the small of Bucky’s back. He’d had a hard night, listening for Amy and Lilly in the other room had broken his heart, but it had felt like Bucky had slept well. Which was something. “Yeah.”  
  
The baby stopped fussing and blinked up at them. Bucky's heart stopped. Those eyes. They were huge, they were intense, they were incredibly purple. More than friends then. Or at least it was more complicated than _just_ friends. Something tickled in the back of his mind. Something about purple eyes and beautiful babies. “She has Ayame’s eyes.”  
  
Steve felt like a knife was being driven into his heart. Bucky’s voice was cold. All the love and wonder from the first time he had commented on that fact was gone. He didn’t remember. He hadn’t just forgotten Amy. He’d forgotten their little girl too. “Yeah, there’s a resemblance.”  
  
Lilly’s face scrunched up again and she started to howl.  
  
Steve scooped her into his arms. That was Lilly’s hungry cry. He thought they were out of premade bottles and there was no water up here to make more. There had been a lot going on in the last day. Amy had been particularly distracted. He’d have to find her. She’d been downstairs in her office the last time he’d checked. When he’d asked if she wanted tea, she’d just hummed noncommittally and kept reading a report on her tablet. Or at least staring at the tablet. Her eyes hadn’t been quite focused. She was probably still downstairs pretending to read.  
  
“I’ll take her.” Amy said from the door. She was silk and steel. Silk and steel didn’t feel pain. And neither did she.  
  
“Aims—” Steve didn’t know how long she’d been there. Long enough he was sure. If his heart was breaking, how was hers holding up? He wished she would just talk to him.  
  
Amy refused to let any cracks form in her calm mask. They would be fine. Her boys still had each other. As long as they had love, she would be fine. In a dark place at the back of her mind, her powers stirred. She could make him love her. He might not remember her, but she could make him feel like he needed her. It wouldn’t be the same. It wouldn’t be _real_. But he would never know the difference.  
  
She couldn’t do that to him. She couldn’t take away his freewill just to ease her own pain. Amy held her arms out towards Steve. Focus on what you have, not what you’ve lost. Survive today, tackle tomorrow when it came. She would feed her baby, get her back to sleep. And then she would find some temporary relief from the situation. Possibly in violence. “Just let me take her, Steve.”  
  
Steve settled Sayuri in Amy’s arms. He didn’t like how still she had gone. There was a determined glint in her eyes. He didn’t think he wanted to know what that determination was. Amy was too much of a martyr when it came to him and Bucky.  
  
He shot a quick look over his shoulder at the still very confused looking Bucky, before leaning closer to Amy so he could whisper to her without being over heard. One thing a crying baby was good for was covering noise. "We should talk."  
  
"I have to feed Lilly." Amy looked down at the baby rather that up at her father. "Just look after him today. I'll come up with some options."  
  
It was only Sayuri howling louder that convinced Steve to let Amy pull away. Coming up with options and talking things out weren't mutually exclusive, but they weren't the same thing either.  
*****  
  
It was an irritatingly nice day. Amy would have preferred a nice storm. Something destructive. Something with lightning, or better yet, a good strong blizzard. Howling wind and ice sharp enough to cut unprotected skin. Instead, a cheery sun made the Katsura grounds look like the inspiration for a thousand paintings that they were. She rested a hand on the hilt of her katana, the texture of silk and sharkskin were reassuring. The weight of the twin blades on her hip even more so. She stalked along the path between the trees, a sleeping baby in the crook of her arm. She needed something to help her burn through this energy. Preferably something violent.  
  
Dai met her as she crossed the bridge separating the formal gardens from the practice grounds. He didn’t bother to say anything, which Amy appreciated, just tapped his knuckles against hers, took Sayuri from her, and fell into step behind her left shoulder.  
  
Amy pushed her shoulders back. She still had Dai on her side. Dai was always on her side. “Keep everybody away from the pavilion for now. I don’t want to see anyone until we figure out our next steps.”  
  
Dai studied the back of Amy’s head. He didn’t like how stiffly she was holding herself. A tense Ayame was a danger. To herself as much as to anyone else. Keeping her away from the general populous was a good idea. He’d mop up the mess out here and trust Steve to keep her reasonably secure internally… And check on her himself at regular intervals. “And the princess?”  
  
Amy took a deep breath. Right, Shuri was still here. Hopefully Yuma was doing a good job keeping her entertained. Amy certainly wasn’t being a very good host. Amy considered what to do about Shuri. She’d be safer back in Wakanda than she was here. And that would be one more thing Amy didn’t have to worry about. “Fill her in and send her home. I’ll keep her updated, but there’s nothing she can do here.”  
  
Dai could handle that. He could also handle the mood Amy was in. “I have a sparing session scheduled with Nobu’s team, assuming you want to punch someone in the face.”  
  
Amy’s grip tightened on the hilt of her sword. Her run this morning felt like years ago. “Gods, do I.”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky followed the sound of Steve’s voice. He was either talking on the phone or to someone much quieter. Bucky couldn’t tell which through the muffling of the walls. He edged down the hall. There was no denying that this place was secure. He liked that about it.  
  
He’d like it better if the paper doors didn’t distort the sounds so much.  
  
Steve’s words finally resolved into something comprehendible. “--want to know when she’ll be back, Dai. She missed lunch. She’s not answering her phone.”  
  
Bucky stopped with his hand on the doorframe. _She. Ayame._  
  
"Avoiding me isn't going to help. She was doing it last night too, and this morning she wouldn't talk to me."  
  
Bucky was pretty sure that tapping sound was Steve repeatedly bumping his fist against one of the wood beams that supported the outer wall.  
  
“Of course, I want to give her space and let her make her own decisions.” Stress and irritation laced Steve’s words. Obvious even through the door. “That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t talk it through. Our plans are better when we run them together.”  
  
There was a long pause while Steve waited for a response from whoever was on the other end of the phone call. Bucky held his breath too.  
  
“Lilly deserves to know her fath—” Steve bit off the word in the middle of a syllable, cut off by the person he was talking to.  
  
_Lilly deserves to know her father._ Bucky’s heart leapt her his throat. She did. She was beautiful. Flawless. She deserved to be loved and supported by both of her parents. Was Bucky keeping Steve from her? Was that what kept screaming in the back of his mind?  
  
Steve deflated, letting out a long, exhausted, sigh. “Just let her know I’m worried about her. And make sure she eats something.”  
  
“Yeah. I know you’ve been doing this longer than I have.” Steve sounded wrung out. “Tell her?”  
  
Bucky made a point of opening with a scrape. It was harder than it should have been. The track was smoothly polished and waxed.  
  
Steve jerked and turned towards the door, stuffing his phone back into his pocket. “You’re awake.”  
  
“Yeah.” Bucky shuffled into the room and looked around. Steve was anxious, with dark circles under his eyes, and a shake to his hands. Bucky nodded at the phone Steve was trying to hide. “What was that about?”  
  
Steve closed his eyes. The question twisting the knife in his heart. “The doctors say we’re supposed to let you remember things on your own.”  
  
“Only I don’t know what I’m supposed to be remembering.” Bucky growled. The beautiful woman sheltering them from… Bucky wasn’t sure what, but he knew it was something. The perfect baby. Whatever was wrong with their bed. And now mysterious phone calls. He was missing something. Something important.  
  
Steve cupped the back of Bucky’s neck and pressed his forehead against Bucky’s. “I know. Just try. Please. I need you to remember.”  
  
*****  
  
It was good to lay down. Despite not doing anything all day, Bucky was exhausted. His head still ached, and it throbbed sharply if he moved his head to fast. Laying down and closing his eyes helped. Laying down with Steve next to him, helped even more. Still, he couldn’t quite relax. There was something off about their bed. Bucky couldn’t place what. The mattress was soft, the blankets warm, but it still wasn’t _right_. Maybe it was just that it wasn’t _their bed_. It definitely wasn’t Steve next to him. That felt more right than anything else he could remember.  
  
He propped himself on his elbow to look down at Steve. There was something lost about him today. Poor guy was probably still drowning under the weight of residual worry. Bucky was tough, but brain surgery was brain surgery and Steve was known to fret himself to pieces over the people he cared about. Bucky kissed the centre of his chest. “I love you.”  
  
“I love you too.” Steve ran his fingers through Bucky’s hair. He did. He loved Bucky so much. But everything about this moment was wrong. This was Amy’s bedroom and they had chased her out. Steve couldn’t even begin to count the number of times he and Bucky had kissed while Amy was away. They had spent every night wrapped around each other. Made love easily a dozen times. None of it held felt like cheating. This. This felt like cheating. On both of them.  
  
He still had no idea what was going on in Amy's head. She'd been physically at dinner, but she wouldn't meet his eyes, and she'd locked herself in her office with Sayuri as soon as she'd finished eating.  
  
Amy slid open the door to the bedroom. Kneeling to enter her own bedroom felt needlessly formal. Formality was a form of armour. One she needed right now. She knew, deep in her bones, that she wouldn’t be staying here tonight. She just couldn’t imagine denying Steve a chance to say goodnight to his daughter. Not when he’d had so few.  
  
“What is she doing here?” Bucky growled, wrapping his arm around Steve protectively. Ayame was too pretty. And her child with Steve was too sweet. He didn’t like the idea that she could steal Steve away from him. But with that baby and those eyes. It would be all too easy for her.  
  
Steve looked at Amy, heartbroken. Bucky remembered their bed. How could he still not remember how much Amy belonged in it?  
  
Amy smiled serenely. As much as it hurt, she couldn’t let the cracks show. Steve was only just holding himself together. She couldn’t put more on him. “I brought Lilly to say goodnight.”  
  
Bucky relaxed a little. Saying goodnight to little Sayuri was fine. Bucky couldn’t fault Steve for loving the baby. She was obviously a sweet child. “Oh. Okay.”  
  
Amy sunk softly to her knees next to Steve, Sayuri shifting sleepily in her arms. Steve should have had more time with his daughter. Time to enjoy the miracle of her without anything hanging over them. Everything was so much more complicated now.  
  
Steve kissed Lilly’s soft curls, hand cupping the top of her tiny head. “Sleep tight, sweetheart. I'll see you in the morning.” He brushed Amy’s left hand as she pulled away. She knew that she was his sweetheart. They would figure this out. It might take time, but they could. Worst case scenario… she’d made Bucky fall in love with her once. She could do it again. It would be easier this time, she wouldn’t be trying to deny her feelings this time.  
  
Amy dropped her eyes from his worried look. He was looking at her like all they needed to do was sit down talk out a plan. Only life wasn’t that simple. She could only think of one solution to this problem, and she hated it. “Goodnight boys. I'll see you in the morning.”  
  
*****  
  
In the morning, Steve left Bucky sleeping soundly. They had expected Bucky to sleep a lot during his recovery. They hadn’t expected it to feel like a relief. At least, Steve hadn’t. From the way she had instantly started retreating inside herself he suspected Amy had been more prepared for this than he was. He followed the sound of birds through the main room. Amy had the walls rolled open to the morning air, kneeling on the encircling walkway, a tray of tea next to her. He lowered himself to the floor, dangling his legs off the walkway. There was a second upside down teacup on the tray. Steve flipped it over and reached for the teapot. Limited as their intimacy could be right now, they could at least share a morning cup of tea.  
  
Amy stilled his hand. Taking the pot herself and filling his cup with steaming liquid. “How did you sleep?”  
  
“I’ve had worse nights.” Steve brushed his knuckles over the back of Amy’s hand. Not many. But he had. He wouldn’t ask how hers had been. He’d heard Lilly wake up and Amy sing her back to sleep at least twice.  
  
A small black and white bird landed in the tree in front of them, trilling a disconcertingly cheery song.  
  
Steve watched Amy sip her tea. He didn’t like what he was seeing. The tea wasn’t the issue. The issue was the knife she was twirling between her fingers, the fact it was barely six am and she was awake, and the way her expression was still porcelain smooth. She wasn’t working. So, the knife was to deal with stress. To keep her focused on something other than everything that was going wrong. He understood why she was stressed. Bucky not remembering was hard. She was pulling away. He hated how she was pulling away. He had no idea how to bring her back. “He's still remembering. Don’t give up on us yet.”  
  
“I’m not giving up.” Amy watched the light flash on her blade. She wasn’t. She would find a way to get her boys back. She didn’t know how or when. But somehow, she would. She might just need some time. And space.  
  
If he believed that, Steve would feel worlds more confident about the future. He reached over to tuck her hair behind her ear. She was almost as pale as her hair again today. “Amy…”  
  
“Don’t say it.” Amy closed her fist around the hilt of the dagger. She couldn’t handle it right now. If Steve told her he loved her, in that sweet way he did when he thought she was hurting, she’d break down and cry. She knew she would.  
  
“You know?” Steve asked seriously. He wouldn’t say it if she didn’t want him to. Saying it wasn’t the important part anyway.  
  
“I know.” Amy slipped her dagger back into its sheath. “Can you watch Lilly for a while? I need a run.”  
  
Steve wished he could pull her into his lap and hold her for a while. Just until everything was alright. At least until he knew what alright looked like again. He couldn’t, all he could really do was give her the space she clearly wanted and look after Bucky for both of them. “Of course, sweetheart. Anything you need.”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky leaned over the bassinet. There was something fascinating about the baby. A little bit of Steve, a little bit of Amy. A little bit of a mystery. She was so little. He didn’t see Steve abandoning his pregnant partner, even for him. But he was almost positive that he had escaped from Hydra more than a year ago. Three felt more right.  
  
Little Lilly looked up at him, gumming her fist. Awake and quiet was strange state for her. She’d spent most of the last day either asleep or crying. It felt like she woke up every few hours crying. Every time she had during the night Bucky had woken up, Steve had tensed next to him, at least until the sound of her mother soothing her had come across the hall to them. The first time he could have sworn a still mostly asleep Steve had reached across him looking for something… someone? Bucky reached down and rubbed Sayuri’s stomach. Steve and Amy made for one cute baby. He just wished he could remember all the events around her. “Why do I feel like you’re the only one not keeping something from me?”  
  
Her fist bumped against his hand as she waved it. Bucky smiled and rocked his hand again, rolling her gently from side to side. He thought she liked his voice. At least, she was looking at his face, and he thought that might be a smile. Those purple eyes were so happy and so intelligent.  
  
Amy froze in the door to the nursery, Ōjo twining around her ankles. She had only come up because she wanted to grab her swords in hopes the weight on her hip would help her feel more confident. Her heart hammered in her throat. She was hallucinating. Bucky was bent over Sayuri, smiling down at her as warmly as he had the first time. Steve kept telling her to have faith. To trust that Bucky would remember her and Sayuri if she just gave them time. Had it happened? Had he remembered them? Could she have her boys back? Her family? She took a half step into the room. Please, let him remember. Let him look at her and see her the way he used to. “Bucky?”  
  
Bucky started and jumped away from the baby. He hadn’t been doing any thing wrong, but he still felt guilty. “Sorry, I—”  
  
Lilly’s heartbroken wail cut him off before he had to explain what exactly he’d been doing.  
  
Amy rushed forward and scooped her daughter into her arms, cradling her little head against her neck and bouncing softly. She had hoped Sayuri was too small to notice. A vain hope from the looks of it. The tension between her parents was thick enough to cut with a knife, and Bucky sudden coldness had evidently been noticed, or maybe she had just picked up on her mother’s anxieties. “ _Shhhh. I know little Fox. I know. No need to fret. You are so loved. So very loved_.”  
  
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make her cry.” Bucky backed slowly towards the door. He didn’t know why he felt so off centre. He hadn’t done anything wrong. So why did everything feel so _wrong_? “I’ll just…”  
  
He almost tripped over the cat in his haste to get out of the room. It glared at him with those too intelligent, too green, eyes. It felt like it was accusing him of something. He wished he new _what_ it was accusing him of. He should go back to bed. He felt better every time he woke up. Maybe the next time he would remember what the hell was going on.  
  
*****  
  
The run hadn’t helped as much Amy had hoped. The awkward lunch afterwards even less so. Bucky had watched her nervously, Steve had worried a linen napkin to shreds without noticing, Sayuri had fussed more than she ever had before, and Amy hadn’t been able to do more than pick at her food. Even with Lilly and Bucky upstairs for their respective naps the atmosphere was still tense. Amy had opened the walls again to try and get some air into the room. No matter how hard she tried, she just couldn’t breath.  
  
Hugging herself, Amy watched the wind rustle through the trees next to the veranda. They would start to change colour soon. She loved fall in Katsura. Adored the calm beauty of it. She needed that kind of calm in her life right now. And Sayuri needed the stability. If she couldn’t have the life her fathers had planned, she could at least have the security and family offered by the Fox Clan. Amy had enjoyed growing up surrounded by her Aunts, Sayuri would too. Kiki would ensure regular playdates with Hideo and Dai and Fredrick would dote be able to dote on her here, maybe Natasha would come visit occasionally. It would be a good childhood. Even if it wasn’t what her parents had planed.  
  
Steve ran his hands down her arms. It was so wrong, stealing time together when Bucky was asleep. He hated it almost as much as he hated the way Amy had closed herself off from him. It had only gotten worse since that first night. She was determined. But determination and confidence were different things. Steve would give almost anything to go back to the way things had been before the surgery. Their life had been so perfect that morning. The four of them together. So happy. The future ahead of them so bright. “What are you thinking?”  
  
Amy nodded. It had been a hard but, in the end, there had really only been one choice. “I want to stay here.”  
  
Steve didn’t know what to say. This was all so unfair. He didn’t want to take what little comfort being home offered Amy away, but being here put them all in danger. All four of them. Steve didn’t even want to think about what would happen to Lilly if anyone found out he and Bucky were here. “We can’t. Even doing the surgery here was a risk. As soon as Buck is stable enough to travel, we need to get out of here."  
  
Amy swallowed the lump in her throat. A risk she had insisted they take. Bucky had been in favour of the surgery, but she was the one who had really pushed it. “You and Bucky can’t stay. There’s no reason Lilly and I should leave.”  
  
Steve felt his beautiful future slipping through his fingers like sand. “Amy...”  
  
“I can’t do it, Steve. I’m sorry. I can’t—” Amy’s voice cracked. She buried her face in his chest before she broke down any further. She had to keep herself together, she had Lilly to think about.  
  
“Okay. Okay.” Steve cradled her softly. Kissing her head as he tried to think his way out of this. They couldn’t lose her. Not after everything. He couldn’t ask her to stay with them either, not if it was going to crush her heart like this. She deserved better than this pain. “Here’s what we’re going to do. Lilly’s going to be up in a few minutes and she’s going to be hungry. After she’s had her dinner, I’ll take her. We’ll make up some bottles, and I’ll take her all night and all day tomorrow. You can get some real sleep, spar with your team, go out for lunch with Dai, take a nice long soak, meditate in the garden. Whatever you need to do. After that, we’ll figure out a plan.”  
  
*****  
  
Lilly dozed in Steve’s arms. He knew he wasn’t supposed to carry her around while she was asleep, but he’d been finding excuses to keep holding and looking at her all day. He cupped her head protectively. His beautiful little girl. She deserved a better world than this. One where her parents weren’t tearing themselves apart. Steve looked up at the sound of the door rolling shut. Amy had been gone longer than he had thought she would be. She’d missed dinner, and he’d been starting to worry she wouldn’t be back before morning at all.  
  
Another crack formed in his heart. She didn’t look any more relaxed than she had before she had left. If anything, she looked worse. Shoulders slumped, cotton robe rumpled, dark circles under her eyes. She had obviously found herself a fight and showered to remove the evidence, but a shower couldn’t cover the lived red welt that cut across the right side of her face.  
  
Steve reached up and touched the lash mark. It looked worse than it was. Whatever had caused it, must not have made solid contact. It hadn’t broken skin, more a bruise than a cut. By the end of the week her cheek would be back to smooth unblemished perfection. Would he be around to see it? Or would she send them away before that? “Where did you go?”  
  
“A few clicks north. There’s an oni nest in the mountains. A crack between worlds. It needs cleaning out every once in a while.” Amy sunk to her knees next to them. He didn’t need to know how fast she had driven on the way there, or how close a fight cleaning it out had been. Amy rubbed Lilly’s stomach. The baby opened her eyes and cooed softly. “What did you get up to?”  
  
Steve held Sayuri’s hand and waved it as he spoke. She had such a strong grip. “We read a book, we looked at ourselves in the mirror, then papa tried to figure out how to hold his little girl while he ate.”  
  
“That’s what the U-shaped pillow is for, _Mon Ours_.” Amy took one of Sayuri’s hand from Steve and kissed her little fingers. “So, you can set her down.”  
  
“Yeah. That’s what Bucky said.” Steve brushed Sayuri’s forehead. He didn’t know how much time he was going to have _to_ hold her. He wasn’t about to lose a second of it, just to make it easier to eat.  
  
“Bucky…” Amy trailed off. She could picture it perfectly. ‘Steve, put the baby down. She’ll be there once you’re done eating and you’re going to get crumbs on her.’ Had he said it with warm exasperated affection? Or had he snapped at Steve. Threatened by what Lilly meant for their ‘new’ relationship.  
  
“He came down for dinner.” Steve wanted his family back so much it hurt. “He likes her, Aims. Even held her for a while before he went back to sleep.”  
  
“Him liking her isn’t the problem, Steve.” Amy dropped the little hand and sat back against the wall. That was something at least. “She’s a beautiful, happy, baby. Everyone who meets her, loves her.”  
  
Steve chose to look down at Lilly instead of at Amy. “You’re still not coming home with us, are you?”  
  
“It’s not home, _Taii_. Not if I don’t have you.” She closed her eyes before tears could start to form. “This is a good place to grow up. She’ll be happy here.”  
  
Steve wondered how much pain Amy was holding in for that much to show on her face. “Will you be?”  
  
“Why wouldn’t I be?” She sighed, rubbing the back of her neck and the whipcord tight muscles there. She would be living in the lap of luxury, surrounded by her friends and family, she could travel again, go to parties and fashion shows, pick up her academic work in her free time. It was a dream life. She would have nothing to complain about. At least as far as the world at large was concerned.  
  
Steve didn’t have an answer to that. At least not one that would help. He'd been trying to come up with a way to stay with her since she'd made her pronouncement. He still couldn't think of anything that wouldn't put her in danger. Not while he was still so wanted. They could steal time together. A few hours together here and there. But it wouldn't be fair to any of them. None of this was fair. "If I stay with you..."  
  
"You can't." Amy said, before he could get any further with the thought. A new burst of panic washing over her. "If you stay here, they'll find you. And they'll take you away from both of us."  
  
Steve closed his eyes, willing himself to not cry on his baby. "I can't lose you."  
  
"You aren't. We'll find a way. Once... once he's stable I'll come visit. We can figure something out." Amy bit her lip. A soft light trickled down the stairs. How could you miss someone who was in the same building this much? “You said he’s asleep?”  
  
“Yeah, out like a light.” Steve said, stroking Sayuri’s head. Steve had checked on him an hour ago. Asleep Bucky looked almost the same he had last week. The bandage around his forehead was the only outward sign that everything had changed.  
  
“I’m going to sit with him for a bit.” Amy rocked to her feet. Tomorrow they would work out a plan to get the boys back to Wakanda. Tonight… tonight she would mourn a future she had known deep down was never real.  
  
Steve caught her hand and kissed her knuckles softly. Whatever she needed to do to feel like her world wasn’t crumbling. “Okay, sweetheart.”  
  
Amy took a long slow breath to settle pulse a little more. Sitting with Bucky was probably a bad idea. He’d wake up and break her heart all over again. She couldn’t just walk away with saying some kind of goodbye. Even a silent one.  
  
“Amy?” Steve called before she could make it out of the room. She paused, turning back to him curiously. Steve searched her face for any trace of hope. It had gone smooth again, like the pain that had coloured it earlier had never happened. Like none of this was happening. Some days he hated that impassive mask of hers. He'd find a way to make her smile again. He didn't know how yet. But he would. “I love you. We can get through this.”  
  
Amy smiled at him wanly. At this moment, she didn’t know if there was a ‘through this’. There was ‘this’ and all she could think about was protecting them all as much as she could. Which meant giving them up. “Love you too, _Mon Ours_.”  
  
*****  
  
Bucky felt like he was floating. Not in water. Something thicker. Syrup, or maybe blood. It was comfortable. He was safe floating. He couldn’t stay. There was a reason he had to wake up. He couldn’t remember what it was. But he knew he had to. There was light above him, a mix of blue and purple and gold. He swam towards the surface. Towards the light.  
  
Amy curled in on herself, pulling her legs up to her chest and resting her cheek on her knee. Out the window she could see the last hints of sunset. Sunset was a good time for goodbyes. Tomorrow she should start working on getting the boys home. Bucky would be happier in Wakanda. She should call Shuri and Nakia first. Ask them to clean all of her stuff out of the bedroom. Or would out of the suite be better? Bucky was obviously worried that she was going to try as steal Steve. As if she could. As if she would. They belonged together. Her being a part of that had been a lovely, temporary, fantasy. At least she had gotten Sayuri out of it. She made all the pain worth it. She looked down at Bucky’s peaceful features. No. It would have been worth it without Sayuri. The pain would fade and leave only the love, however brief.  
  
Bucky blinked at the creature that next to him. She was beautiful. All purple eyes and white hair pulled up in a bun. He wanted reached out to touch that hair, but his right arm felt too heavy and he couldn’t feel his left arm at all. Starlight. That’s what her hair made him think of, starlight. Was she an angel? No. The spark of a memory in the back of his mind told him she was something else. ‘Angels have to be good. Goddesses are allowed to be more… Complicated.’ Complicated. That felt right. His girl was complicated. That felt right too. She was his. She also looked sad. That didn’t feel right. He could accept a little worry, although he didn’t think the was the first time he had woken up, it was hard to say, his head hurt. But the bereft expression darkening her eyes was all wrong. “Amy?”  
  
“Hi. I…” Amy’s voice cut off with a sad strangled noise. Not her. She was nothing to him right now. He wouldn’t accept the affection from her. “Steve didn’t want you to wake up alone.”  
  
Bucky managed to raise his right arm, even though it felt like swimming through we cement. He wanted to see her smile. He tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear. And what had she been about to say before she changed her mind? Steve didn’t want him to wake up alone, but what about her? Why did she only seem sadder when he touched her? He remembered touching her. He had a vision in his head of Steve wrapped around her from behind, her head falling back on Steve’s shoulder, Bucky’s hand on her thigh, and skin, so much skin. It felt real.  
  
"Don't be sad, baby girl." There were other memories. A cool hand stroking his hair. A morsel of fruit on the tip of a knife. A bell like laugh as he swept her around a dancefloor. Steve half curled around her as they washed dishes together. He stroked his thumb over her cheek. A hundred sweet quiet moments rushing back to him. “I love you.”  
  
“I love you too.” Tears pricked at the corner her eyes. He remembered her. The icy wall of loneliness that she had so carefully built over the last couple days crumbled, releasing a tidal wave of emotion.  
  
"I loved you for so long. God, you sweet stubborn girl. You didn't make it easy, but I did." Bucky slid his hand around the back of her neck. He had all the strength of a new-born kitten right now, but a light tug was all it took to bring her to his lips. It was a soft kiss, full of deep affection.  
  
Bucky lay back. The taste of her sweet on his lips. More memories were crystallising. He loved her. Her and Steve and… Sayuri. Sweet tiny Sayuri. His beautiful family. He’d made it through the surgery. The rest of their lives stretched ahead of them. "It's okay. It's all going to be okay."  
  
‘Bucky I want to get married.’ The words came back to him again, this time _with_ conversation that had followed. “We were going to ask you to marry us.”  
  
“What?” Amy laughed. She was still completely overwhelmed by his remembering her. A moment ago, she’d been ready to let both her boys go forever. Her mind wasn’t ready to grapple with a proposal. Had that been a proposal. It hadn’t sounded like a question. More like Bucky realising something that made him happy.  
  
Bucky stroked her hair. More and more pieces clicking into place. Steve on his knees. A farm. Talking to a girl, he thought her name was Shuri, about marriage customs. The words started to just flow out of him. “Steve wants to get married. I figured out that we could. In Wakanda. We can get married. We were going to ask you. We just never found the right time. But I’m safe now, aren’t I? There’s no more risk that I’m going to lose control of my mind. They can’t turn me into the Soldier. We were going to ask. We want to spend the rest of our lives together. With each other. With you. All of us together. As a family. Did we ask you? We should have asked you. There was never a good time. You were so scared of being happy. Then we found out about Lilly, you would have thought we were only asking 'cuz we knocked you up. Your Aunt came to visit. She said we could ask. She’s fucking terrifying. You don’t scare me little Fox, but she does. Steve wanted to ask before the surgery, but I didn’t want to break your heart if something happened to me while I was on the table. God, baby girl, do you know how many times I had to kiss Steve to stop him from just blurting out the question. I love you both so much. Steve couldn’t handle it if you said no again. I don’t want to fuck it up when we ask.”  
  
Amy was having a hard time breathing. Her chest was full to bursting with a boiling mess of emotions. She was still scared. Absolutely terrified. Terrified and excited. And relived. So incredibly relived. She hadn’t been able to say yes to Steve when he had asked because of Bucky. That wasn’t an obstacle anymore. The opposite in fact. The fact Steve loved Bucky was another reason to say yes if he asked again. “Don’t worry, Bucky baby. I'm sure you won’t.”  
  
“I wanna marry you little Fox. You and Steve. Fuck, we would be so happy.” Dark tendrils of sleep ate at the corners of his vision, dragging him back under. Bucky curled his finger in her hair, letting his eyes fall closed again. “I’m tired, baby girl. Will you be here when I wake up?”  
  
Amy took Bucky’s hand and kissed his knuckles softly. He remembered her. He more than remembered her. She was vibrating with love. “I'm not going anywhere.”  
  
Steve stood frozen in the doorway. His heart felt like it might burst out of his chest at any moment. The dread and anxiety of the last few days evaporating. “So… He remembers you.”  
  
Amy looked up at Steve. The tears in her lashes refracted the light from the hall. Haloing Steve with rainbows. “Is it true? You were planning to ask me to marry you?”  
  
“Yeah.” Bucky had been so sure they needed to be careful with how they told her. But here they were, with the pieces of their broken life clicking back into place. It was almost perfect. “I want to get married, to you and Bucky specifically. We even talked to Auntie Sakura, while you were in New York, she seemed to approve. Gave us her blessing.”  
  
Amy’s brain scrambled to find some fragment of reason to cling to. A life raft in the flood of feelings. “It would be smart. We couldn’t testify against each other. I might even be able to get you some level of diplomatic immunity. Bare minimum it is going to take them a while to figure out what to do about there being three of us. The Hague really isn’t set up for that sort of thing.”  
  
Steve’s limbs finally unlocked. He crossed the room and pulled her up into his arms. She was thinking again. Promisingly, it looked like she was thinking about reasons why they worked, not reasons why they didn’t. He didn’t want her to make this decision with logic. He wanted her to make it with her heart. “I don’t know if it is a good idea. We haven’t talked about the politics of it. We just know that we’ve never been as happy as when the three of us are together. We love each other and we love you. If you feel the same way, we’d like to make things official. _I_ love you. _I_ want to make things official.”  
  
Amy curled her fingers into the fabric of Steve’s shirt. It was a good thing he was holding her, because she honestly didn’t know if her knees were working. “I love you.”  
  
Steve tucked a finger under her chin and made her look up at him. Her eyes were so bright right now, he could see sparks dancing around her irises. He could feel love radiating off her, but he wasn’t sure if that was her powers, or just the emotion of the moment. “You don’t have to say yes or no right now. You can take as long as you need.”  
  
The tears finally overflowed. Twinned rivulets pouring down her face. “I think… I think I want to say yes. It’s just… even if you both love me, it’s complicated.”  
  
Steve tightened his grip on her. Yes. She wanted to say yes. Bucky had said yes. Whatever the complications were, they could figure it out. Together. “Then we’ll talk about it. We’ll go over all the complications. Figure out strategies to work through them. Or you can have us --me-- without any formal bonds. I’ll love you either way. That won’t change.”  
  
Amy sniffed. He was always so confident. She wanted him to be right. Wanted them working to be as simple as he seemed to think it was. “I’ll try not to cry next time you ask.”  
  
“As long as they are happy tears.” Steve kissed the salty tracks off her cheeks. He wasn’t giving her up. There was no compromising this time. Just Steve, and the people he loved and a life together. Once they were home in Wakanda, he’d put together something special. A happy memory for all three of them. Something with no shadows hanging over it.


	79. Till The End Of The Line

Nearly two months of planning had gone into this night. Now that it was here, Steve didn’t feel prepared at all. He was sure something would go wrong.  
  
Irrationally, dropping off Lilly was the part he was most worried about. This was the longest they would be leaving her with anyone other than Dai. And leaving her with Daisuki didn’t count as leaving her, not really. Rationally, Steve knew that she was just as safe with T’Challa and his team of bodyguards as with Amy’s cousin. Rational Steve and looking after Sayuri didn’t always overlap. Happy as she looked, gazing up at the king, her fist in her mouth, he couldn’t quite shake the urge to snatch her back and scrap the whole plan.  
  
T’Challa bounced the baby making her smile and grizzle happily. She was so cute, and her eyes were absolutely huge. He kind of wanted one himself. He wondered what Nakia would say. UN Ambassador was a job she could do while pregnant. And Nakia’s baby would be even cuter than Steve and Ayame’s. With big mahogany coloured eyes, instead of Sayuri’s unnaturally purple ones. And Nakia’s button nose. How adorable would Nakia’s nose be on a baby?  
  
Steve double checked that Lilly’s rattle was firmly clipped onto the shoulder of her onesie. She got sad if she yanked it off and it fell. And she was so particular about how you gave her bottles. If she wasn’t at the right angle she wouldn’t latch properly. “You’re sure you’ll be alright.”  
  
“My son can handle looking after a child for a couple of hours.” The Queen Mother scolded, chucking Sayuri under the chin.  
  
“And he will have ample supervision.” Okoye said softly so only Steve could hear.  
  
Steve tried not to laugh as he clapped T’Challa on the shoulder. She was probably right about that. There weren’t a lot of babies in the place. People would probably be ‘dropping by’ to see T’Challa and by extension his charge, all night. Which meant T’Challa would be fielding ‘when are you having one’ all night. Which he probably knew, and also probably wasn’t as prepared for as he thought he was. “Thanks for this. Do you need me to show you how the bottle warmer works again?”  
  
T’Challa did laugh. Patting Steve’s hand and shifting Sayuri higher in his grip. “Now, you are just stalling. Get out of here. You have big plans tonight.”  
  
“Papa loves you, Lilypad.” Steve kissed Sayuri’s head one last time. He had huge plans tonight.  
  
*****  
  
Steve scanned the clearing in front of Bucky’s hut. Garlands of white and pink flowers and glossy greenery ringed the area. Dozens of candles all glowing and flickering beautifully in cylindrical vases. The stars overhead were bright. There was a picnic basket waiting inside. It was perfect. Romantic, but casual. Elegant, but rustic. The ideal background for a dramatic gesture. Steve shot the cuffs on his dress shirt and smoothed his tie. Now he just had to live up to it.  
  
“Very pretty.” Amy bent to inhale the sweet scent of rock jasmine. Someone had put a lot of thought into creating a bower worthy of a fairy-tale. She would put money on a combination of the love-struck artist in front of her and the hopeless romantic of a princess he’d been huddling with of late. She certainly wasn’t about to complain. Not when Steve in a suit surrounded by candles and flowers played so well to her aesthetic sensibilities.  
  
Steve spun around to face her. He hadn’t heard her arrive, but he never did. She looked perfect too. Which Steve wanted to take some credit for. He had picked out the mist grey dress she was wearing, and he had been right about how flattering the double slit and deep neckline would be on her. Although, she had added the necklace he had given her, and a silk wrap painted with swirling purple winds on her own.  
  
“Steve. Why are we out here? Why am I wearing a dress? And what did you do with my daughter?” Amy draped her arms around his neck and matched her body to his. She’d gotten out of her post-workout shower to discover Steve and the baby missing, a dress laid out on the bed, and a note directing her to meet Steve and Bucky at the farm.  
  
“In no particular order. I got us a sitter so we could spend some time together. You’re wearing a dress because you look good and you should dress up for important events. And you know why we’re here.” Steve breathed the last words, slowly combing his fingers through her hair. The fact she had left her hair down was proof that she knew, or at lest suspected. She would have put it up if she thought it was just dinner. But she’d left it down, because both of her boys liked to play with it.  
  
“What’s with all the candles?” Bucky slipped his arm around Amy’s waist, hooking a finger into Steve’s belt loop in the process. He still couldn’t get over how good it felt to hold both of them. “Sorry I’m late. Got caught up helping Shuri move a table.”  
  
Amy reached back and curled her fingers into his hair. He was wearing a suite too, no tie for him though. Just soft white cotton open at the throat. She had a sneaking suspicion she should be paying attention, memorising the details so she could tell her children about them later. “Do you know what’s going on, _Mon Loup_? Your boyfriend has gone all mysterious.”  
  
“I don’t even pretend to know what’s going on with the punk.” Bucky chuckled, kissing Amy’s neck. All he knew was Steve had stopped by the lab this morning, with a garment bag and instructions to send him down to the farm in time for dinner. Although, given that they were all dressed up and Steve had decorated, Bucky could make an educated guess. There had been a number of ‘theoretical’ conversations about marriage over the last two months. Bucky had approved and participated enthusiastically. In no small part because they tied in so well with his reassuring his little Fox that despite his brain's brief betrayal, he loved her, and wasn't going anywhere.  
  
It turned out there were more logistical issues with being married to their little Fox than Steve and Bucky had anticipated. Ayame had family commitments, taking her on meant taking them on too.  
  
That was fine. Steve had largely dedicated his life to defending the planet from outside threats already. And protecting the Japanese royal family wasn’t exactly a huge burden, not when they had the rest of the Fox Clan keeping an eye on them too. Raising Sayuri to be a ninja would have been a good idea even without an obligation. Her parents had enemies; she would need to be able to protect herself. In theory, there was nothing to keep them from getting engaged anymore.  
  
Tonight, it looked like theory was being put into practice.  
  
“Jerk.” Steve leaned over Amy to peck Bucky on the lips. “See if I do anything romantic for you after this.”  
  
“Come on, Stevie. We only tease because we love.” Buck grinned and rubbed his cheek against Amy’s. He did, he loved Steve so much it was indelibly etched on his brain. “What’s so special about tonight?”  
  
Steve captured a hand from each of them, folding them together between his. He lowered himself to one knee. He’s doing this right for once in his life. He kissed Amy's wrist softly. “I love you. More than I ever thought I could love anyone. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, both of you.”  
  
“Love you too, Stevie.” Bucky ran his thumb over the back of Steve’s hand.  
  
Amy couldn’t talk. Couldn’t do anything other than smile with her whole body. She didn’t remember why she had been so scared of this moment before. She shifted closer to Bucky. Wrapping her arm around his waist and cuddling into his shoulder. She was overflowing with love. Pure, uncomplicated love. She let the emotion flow out of her, violet sparks floating over her skin and sinking into Bucky who sighed and pressed his cheek to her hair.  
  
Steve cleared his throat. This was it. The moment he had been building up to for months, if not years. “Kitsui Ayame Winters, James Buchanan Barnes, will you marry me?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for coming along with me on this journey. It's been a wild ride.
> 
> I've got a couple of prequals waiting in the wings. Some Peggy awesomeness to get us through the next month. Then Nat and Clint getting themselves into trouble. After that we will be rejoicing our lovelies to watch two super soldiers and a ninja try to raise a baby.
> 
> There might be a slight delay before the next major section though. I'm way behind on writing it. It has been a year and other projects keep stealing my attention. I'll give you guys a more exact timeline once we get through Nat's prequel. Just be prepared.


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